American Horror Story (2011–…): Season 5, Episode 11 - Battle Royale - full transcript

Ramona draws vitality from an unlikely source. Sally uses her past to negotiate her future. Scarlett learns the truth of her family's affliction.

She's back.

She just came through the lobby.

She... she seems upset about something.

Then now is the perfect time.

Are you ready for this, girl?

All right, then.

We go in, guns blazing.

And don't stop.

And once she goes down...

Oh, God.

...we need to make sure she stays down.


# It took seconds of your time
to take his life #

# It took seconds

# For a second...


# For a second...

Goddamn it. Donnie,

what'd you have to go and do that for?

You murdered me.

No, baby, no!

We were aiming for her.

Iris, we need to find her.

We need to finish her!

I am not leaving my son.

Oh, you can't let me die in this place.

You are not gonna die. I won't let you.

It's too late. Please.

You gotta get me out of here.

You can't leave me.

I can't be trapped here
with her other lovers.


All right. Let's go.

Aah! Oh.


What are looking at? Keep moving!

Am I... am-am I safe?

Yes, baby, yes. Yes, baby, you're safe.

You're safe.

Hey. Thank you...



# American Horror Story 5x11 #
Battle Royale
Original Air Date on January 6, 2016

Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh!

Shh... Hey, hey!

Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.


Hold tight.

There's still another
half bullet in there.



Shh, shh!

You saved me.


Because I need you.

Because, for once,

I won't be left.

The bullet nicked your femoral artery.

You lost a lot of blood.

I know every vein

and artery in the human body.

You're certainly

Edward Sexton
with that needle and thread.

They don't call me
Hypodermic Sally for nothing.

You're not going to leave me, right?

They always leave.

Promise me you won't leave me.

I'm not going anywhere.


This kid I grew up with,

Juan Moacanda.

I gave him his first hand job.

We were from the Valley.

Anyway, he went on

to become this giant drug dealer.

His stuff was the shit.

I used to sell it for him.

Made a lot of good friends, you know?

It was always, "I'm hurting, Sally."

"Can you hook me up, Sally?"

Except for Nick Harley

and Tina Black.

The musicians?

I saw them once.

At the Troubadour.

They were almost good.


They were good.

They were good to me.

Same pickup point.

- Yeah, okay.
- They liked my songs.

Still rolling.

- They thought I had talent.
- Two, three,


# Has anybody seen

# My buddy Pain...

# You went out

# For a pack of Pall Malls...

# My buddy Pain...

You want me to cut that out

and keep going or should
we start from the top?

I don't know. What do you think, Sally?

I mean, it's your song, right?

It's hot.

I think you should leave it.

Sally, you damn pervert.

I love you!

You holding?


Well, then we're done here.

Let's get a room

and melt our faces away.

They treated me like an artist.

Oh, your grandest suite

for me and my two nieces, please.

All the rooms are basically the same.

And I'm gonna need a deposit.

What the shit, lady...
based on the way we look?

Has there ever been a more aptly named

style of music than grunge?

Man, this is what
rock and roll looks like now.

It's not hair spray

and spandex anymore.

Just put a towel down on
anything if you sit on it naked.

Poets' skid marks stain
as much as us commoners.

And for the record,

Shout at the Devil was
an underrated masterpiece.

Oh, come on. Yes.

Come on. I hear it feels
like a constant orgasm.

Oh, it's gonna hurt like hell.


I'll write a song about it.

Pull it out, I want to see.

It'll be easy.

I call it the Big Veiny,
for obvious reasons.

# You know what to do about

# When you can't

# Seem to do anything about it

# Just go, go

# Go

# Go...


I just want to crawl inside
your skins and masturbate.

Got to stay close, man.

Thick as thieves. That's how you get

a number-one record... you make it real.

I know how we can get close.

Make it real.

Do you trust me?

# Go, go...

I don't know why the idea came to me.

I just...

I wanted us to be so close.

I just loved them so much.

Tell me you love me.

I didn't want them to ever leave.

Tell me you love me, yeah,

tell me you love me...

No. No, no, no.

No, no, no!

Help me!

Pretty sure they're dead.

Well, almost.

Please call the doctor. They need help.

Not sure what I can do to help them.

They'll be messing themselves
soon enough.

I'll come back.


Postmortem excrement

is the biggest

stain challenge of them all.

No! No, please, help.


I had done an excellent job.

I wouldn't be abandoned this time.

Not for five days.

On day two, he showed up.

He tortured me for three days.

I couldn't take it anymore.

After that...

this was my spot.

It's the only place
I had ever experienced any real

belonging or happiness.

You have serious abandonment issues.

That's why I saved you.

I'm flattered.

Yeah, well, I don't want you, bitch.

I want John.

And he left.

With that battle-ax of a wife

and your sweet angel child.

I want him back in the hotel
and I want him dead,

here with me, forever. So...

I'm gonna need you to do it.

Your timing is off.

I'm gonna get you well.

I'm gonna bring you blood.

As much as you need.

Not human blood.

I need blood like mine.

Would you bring Donovan here?

I can feed off him.

Just a little bit at a time.

Until I'm well.

Donovan is dead.

He was very beautiful.

Do you remember where

your room is?

I'll take you.

You want something to eat?

How 'bout some fruit?

It's rotten.

How long has it been
since you were home?

Too long.

Now that we have Holden, it's
gonna go back to the way it was.

We're gonna be a family again.

How are you going to
explain this to Grandma?

He looks like a baby.

Holden's supposed to be my big brother.

Grandma doesn't have to know.

This is our secret.

As long as we take our medicine,

we'll be healthy.

You mean drink blood?

Is that what happened to Jasper?

Are you going to eat me, too?
Of course not.

You'll always be safe.

How are you going to eat?

That's my job.

It's nothing you have to worry about.

What the hell are they doing here?

You're getting worse.

You're not healing yourself

the way you should be.

You said it. You need blood.

Your blood.


There must be another way.

You don't have a lot of options.

And you need a fix.


It'll kill them.

I'd rather die.

You're not saving anyone.

What do you think's
gonna happen to your children?


It won't take long for Iris
and Liz to mow them down.


Please. Please, I can't.

I can't! It's okay, Mommy.

Let us help you.

My sweet... my...

Hold on to Mommy.



You did it.

Big hotel.

Big furnace.

Thank you.

I just couldn't have him
going down that chute

like so much trash.

Of course not.

Is there any sign of her?

Not yet. Hopefully she crawled
into some corner and died.

It's not likely.


Could I have a minute?


Oh, Donovan.

Sweet baby.

You did always have that mean streak.

I always said that orneriness
came from your father.

But that's not so.

That was pure me.

Oh, we were so much alike.

Maybe that's why we couldn't be close.

But I did love you.

I swear to God I did.

How are you feeling?

Leave me alone.

My goodness,

did we have a little accident?

I want every speck of him gone.

Oh, my.

Who was that?

My son.

Would you like him back in the can?


Use the vacuum.

Where's the bag?

It's bagless.

I'll have him all scooped up in a jiffy!

Are you sure this is a good idea?

We can't go back now.
We didn't kill her.

We'll never get another
chance like that.

She is gonna eat me the minute

you let her out of that cage.

Ramona and I go way back.

I can guarantee you that she'll at least

listen to me.

And we share a common enemy.

And, hopefully, she'll see that that

supersedes any recent mistakes
you may have made.

So we're desperate.

Just out of options.

We'll just point her in
the direction of the Countess

and get out of the way.


What could go wrong?

What the...? Oh!

Oh. How... did that get in here?


Look at all of them.

Oh, God.

That sad soul.

They've all been drained.

This place is a meat locker.



- Run!
- Oh, God!

Not another step!

And don't you dare point

either of those things at me!


the Countess sent you here

to finish me off.

- Oh...
- Well, the game isn't over

till I do the finishin'.

Liz Taylor?

Since when are you working
with the Countess?

No, no, no, no.

We're all working against the Countess.

Not that one.

Bitch put me in that hole
and made me hungry

for blood and revenge.

Eatin' you...

is gonna make me feel doubly good.

- Told you.
- No.

We need her.

We need all of us if we're going to end

the Countess's grip on this place,

her grip on all of us. Please,

- sweetheart.
- Don't you "sweetheart" me.

I have been scratched at, conked out,

and locked up.

But Mama...

is on a course correction.


I should have listened to you
about the Countess,

but I was a love-addled idiot,

so, please... forgive me.

I feel you.

But I'm just not feeling
like myself right now.

I fed...

but something not agreein' with me.

Oh. Oh, but we can fix that.

- Oh, yeah.
- I have...

some of the Countess's purified stash

up at the lounge.

I don't need any of her baby aspirin.

I need to take a life

to bring me back to life!

Well... that can also be arranged.

We can't just go out on the street

and bash somebody in the head.

If you have another idea, I'm all ears.


Is anybody here?

Hey, either of y'all work here?

Dinner is served.

Did you have a reservation?

Uh, yeah. One name:


Oh, yes, I have you.

And you're gonna be staying with us

for three nights.

- Are you traveling alone?
- Just me.

And what brings you to L.A.?

Drew Carey.

I'm here to win big money
on The Price Is Right.



Well, I hope you

get called to "come on down!"

That's actually guaranteed.

Between you and me,

my Supreme did
a little somethin'-somethin'

to my ticket, so...

it's enchanted.

I thought you looked familiar!

I saw you...

I saw you on CNN!

You're one of the witches!

My God.

Oh, my God.

Oh! It's this amazing story.

There's a whole gaggle of them.

They're a bona fide coven.

They wear chic black,
and they do spells...

Oh, my goodness! I hope
you didn't have to marry Satan

or anything to join.

That's actually ignorant and offensive.

We're born that way.

We'll all part of an ancient bloodline.



That's fascinating.

Liz, why don't you go upstairs

and make sure
she has everything in her room

she'll need during her stay.

Oh. Of course.

I'll get right on that.

I'll just be a few minutes.



There's a lot of bad juju in this room.

Oh, that's... the previous tenant.

He's gone.

Ice machine is down the hall,
and local calls are free.

Plenty of fluffy towels

in the bathroom... I just checked.

You're all set.

No. I have a dark feeling.

I'll take another room, please.

Oh, we're close to capacity,

but I'll check when I go downstairs.

Meanwhile, you can freshen up.

You'll want to be
tip-top for the taping.

Bitch, when's the last time
you saw a dermatologist?

Okay, you are obviously trippin'.
What do you want?


Yeah, you clearly don't know
who you're messing with.

That's right...

I'm a human voodoo doll, bitch.

Any hurt on me gonna go
right back to you!

You're a damn witch!

Witch's blood will make me strong.

I ain't nobody's protein shake, bitch!

That's all you got?


I'm not letting some raggedy-ass,

red-dotted, blood-whore freak

take up another second of my time.

It's my vacation, bitch!

The Price Is Right is waitin'.

Come on down!

Why aren't you...

Your magic has nowhere to go, my dear.

You see, I'm not alive.

You may be a witch...

...but I am a ghost.


A shame she had to die.

This one had a flair for the dark arts.

Who the hell are you?

James Patrick March.

You saved me for a reason.

I need you to kill the Countess.

Looks to me you qualify for the job.

And ruin my one chance
for happiness? Oh, no.

She must die in this hotel, but she can't
suspect I had anything to do with it.

You're the only one strong enough.

Then she'll be bound to the Cortez.

She's on the verge
of absconding forever,

and I will not allow it.

Drink up, darling.

You're going to need your strength.

Do you swear you haven't taken

any drugs in the last 30 days?

I'm a cop. I can test you.

Do I have to test you?





Hello, John.


What'd you do with my family?

I didn't do anything.

You know I'm trapped here.

And you want nothing more...

than for me to be trapped here with you.

Well, that's right.

And I would've taken a hammer
to the back of your head

the second you walked in, but...

he wouldn't let me.

March... are you saying
he took my family?

You made him a promise, John.

Where are they? One last kill,

and then I can take you to your family.

They're safe.

For now.

He's never gonna leave me alone

until I give him what he wants.

"Thou shalt not commit murder."

That's all that's left.

I need to find a murderer.

Well, that shouldn't be too difficult.



I hate it when a woman

looks better in one of
my outfits than I do.

I know, I know.

I ought to be in pictures,

'cept I can't be photographed.


we have some accessories for you.

I don't need

any of that.

I got witch's blood in my veins.

Plus, a golden opportunity.

The Countess has never
been more vulnerable.

I don't need any convincing, sisters.

It's time... for me to rise

and her...

to fall.

It's not the Shalimar
that gives you away.

It's your blood.

I've never known another woman

whose blood smelled like walnuts.

Yours still smells like black licorice.

You look incredible.

What have you been eating?

I just had me a witch.


I feel like grizzly bears
are running through my veins.

I feel strong.

Strong enough to take me down?

I could have Yogi Bear
running though my veins

and I could take you down.

And I imagine that locking you
up in that hallway hasn't

softened your rage towards me.

I fantasized about coming here
and ending you

every day.

And what did you settle on?

You always did like to...

take your time.

I haven't decided yet.

I've never been one to plan.

I prefer improvisation.

I'm weak, but I'm still the champ.

You may beat me,

but you're not getting out
of here without

at least a severe, lifelong limp.

You're bullshitting me?

I think everyone in the world thinks

they're either blessed or cursed.

I've come to realize that I'm neither.

I am a curse.

Nobody that gets within
ten feet of me survives.

And God help you if you get

right up close, skin to skin.

Then you're really screwed.

You're trying
to make me feel sorry for you?

I'm trying to apologize.

I'm not used to this.

Cut me some slack, bitch.

What if I gave you the hotel?

Hah. Severance pay for 20 years of hell?

I liked staying here
because it made me feel safe.

But I see now that it's just
because I was so comfortable

living in heartbreak.

I don't want to be here anymore.

It's harder to kill you

when I'm sitting
in the same room as you.

Easier to carve your heart out
of your chest and eat it

when you're just a monster in my mind.

That sounds like a dream way to die.

So erotic.

I want to go.

Just me and my baby boy.

Okay... kill me.

But screw me first.

# You adore me

# You adore me

# You adore me

# I wanna, I wanna, I wanna be adored #

# I wanna, I wanna, I wanna be adored #

# I wanna, I wanna, I wanna be adored #

# I wanna, I wanna

# I gotta be adored...

# I wanna be adored.

Give yourself a smile, John.

Ten Commandments.

Each victim a worthy
representative of their sin.

And the last one:
Thou shalt not commit murder.

I suppose you or I could
be sitting on that shelf,

but your choice was inspired.

Couldn't have worked out any
better if I had planned it myself.

Aren't you proud of our boy, Sally?

I always knew he was the one.

How do you feel, John?

- It must be exhilarating.
- Yeah.

A true sense of completeness.

I'm completely done.


No! He belongs with me!

No! I need him alive. Out in the world.

There's more at stake here
than your womanly desires.

I have great plans for this one.

- - Stop now before
my addiction demon

becomes your constant companion!

No more plans.

Take me to my family.

- John... John!
- Please!

Do you remember
the first time, Miss Evers?

When I had intimacies
with the opposite sex?

The first time you realized
you were a ghost.

Oh! Well, I was very
frightened and confused,

but I had you to steady my hand.

You were my rock, Mr. March.

Yes, yes.

The Countess will be similarly unmoored.

It's up to us to provide that ballast.

I want everything to be perfect.

What's for dinner?

Chipped beef on toast.

To serve my queen?!

This is an outrage!

Darling, you look ravishing. Come in.

Take my hand.

It'll take some time
to acclimate yourself

to your new state.

How do you feel?

There's no pain but...

no passion.

No passion, no fire.

The passion was in front of your nose,

if only you'd opened
your eyes to see it.

At least I don't have
to spend an eternity

as a pear-shaped frump.


Yes. Uh... you'll find

some frustrations, no doubt,
as you adjust to the vicissitude

of your new life. The inability

to step outside the confines
of this hotel, for one.

But there is no profit
accentuating the limitations.

On the balance, we are blessed.

We are together again, my love.

That one fact erases
a multitude of sins.

I can finally forgive you for
turning me in to the police.

I didn't turn you in.

There is no need for any
further prevarication, darling.

We are reduced to our essence.

I'm not lying.

If I wanted you dead,

I would have killed you myself.

Then who?

You should've left!

Why didn't you leave?!

I knew you would eventually get bored.

Why did you have to die here?

It was me. I did it!

I wanted you for myself!

I left the handkerchief for the police.

I knew that they would come,

and I knew that you would never
allow yourself to be captured.

I wanted us to die together.

So that you can see
the depth of my devotion.

While this one resented every moment

she was obligated
to be in your presence.

I would happily stand behind you,

waiting to serve,

savoring your every word.

Have you seen no evidence of my love?

Do you feel nothing at all?

Can you see me now?

I have laid myself bare.

I've dwelt in silence for so long.

Give me a word, Mr. March.

Let me be happy.

Get out.


are banished from my presence.

I-I feel...

strangely free.

I will no longer wait on you...

...and your whore.

You have nothing.

What else would you

possibly do?

There are more stains
in heaven and earth

than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

A toast.

How thrilled I am
to have you across from me.

Not once a month, but from now on.

Until the sun falls from the sky

and the heavens burn in conflagration.