American Horror Story (2011–…): Season 2, Episode 8 - Unholy Night - full transcript

A murderous Santa wrecks havoc on the asylum. Sister Jude faces off with the Devil. Arden has a shocking encounter in the Death Chute.

BOY: Tommy's is full of holes,

and the tail is falling off.

I want my own, just like Fess Parker.

Is that all Christmas
is to you, presents?

Put this in the can.

Ho, ho, ho!

Merry Christmas!

Now, you be good and listen

to your mom and maybe that

coonskin cap will be under
your tree Christmas morning,

huh? MOM: They're closed.

Come on, I think the Star Market
is open until 9:00.

(switches clank, Christmas music
winds down and stops)


(sniffles, sighs)

He's gonna be pretty steamed at you

if he doesn't get that hat.

Well, if he's good enough,

his mother will end up giving it to him.

If he's naughty, he'll blame himself.

It's never your fault, hmm?

It's all about the list.

Some kid doesn't get
their Renco Frogman,

but you can't blame Santa.

Pretty nifty win-win
you set up for yourself.

Hey, buddy... I'm just ringing
the bell two nights a week,

to get out of the house
till my wife falls asleep.


(four gunshots)

("We Wish You a Merry
Christmas" playing)

♪ ♪

GIRL: Santa?


Hi, sweetie.

This is a fantastic train set.

The farm even has tiny little hay bales.

It's my dad's.


Where's your beard?

I shaved. It was scratchy.

Why are you here?

Christmas isn't for six days.

That's what you get
for letting Rudolph organize

your calendar. And it would

explain the lack of milk and cookies.

(wind whistling)

Why didn't you come through the chimney?

What's your name, sweetie?

Susie. (Gasps) Susie.

That's a lovely name.

Well, Susie, none of it
makes much sense, does it, huh?

Flying reindeers,

shimmying down chimneys,

every good Christian house
in the world in one night,

Huh? (Scoffs)

They call me crazy.

Are you hurt, Santa?

Oh, no, no, no, no.

No, this isn't Santa's blood.

You want to take me to Mom and Dad?

Merry Christmas, Daddy.

It's not Christmas yet, baby.

Haven't you been keeping
your advent calendar?

It's wrong. Santa's here.

I think we should all go downstairs.

Milk and cookies time
for you and me, Susie.

What do you want? Money?

I have a safe upstairs, under the bed,

with $5,000 cash in it.

Jewelry, too. You want to know

why I chose your house?


Your Christmas decorations.

("Up on the Housetop" begins)

Christ, man, I mean,

what are you trying
to prove out there, hmm?

What's wrong with a
little Christmas spirit?

You know, you're right.

You're right.

You know what tonight needs?

A little more jingle bells.

Stop! What do you want?

I'm "Santee" Claus!
I'm here to bestow

a little Christmas spirit upon you

because what is Christmas about

if it's not about families
being together?

Do you appreciate that
right now? Do you?

Don't you feel wonderful about being

with your family, huh? Huh?
MAN: Yeah.

Yes? Yes? Yes.

Yes. Yes.


I'm gonna tell you
what Santa's gonna leave

under your tree tonight.

He's gonna leave a little terror.

A little rape.

You keep your hands off of her.

Who said anything about her?

You know the difference between
that Santa Claus and me?

He only comes once a year.

Please leave us.

I have to finish my list, huh?

It wouldn't be Christmas
without one big ticket item

from Santa's sack.

And I'm feeling so full

of the Christmas spirit, I...

am gonna let you choose

which one of you

I kill first.

No, please. Stop.

Y-You don't have to do this.

You know what?

I'm not feeling

very Christmassy.


(Gene Autry's "Here Comes
Santa Claus" plays)

♪ Here comes Santa Claus,
here comes Santa Claus ♪

♪ Right down Santa Claus Lane ♪

♪ Vixen and Blitzen
and all his reindeer ♪

(whistle blowing)

♪ Bells are ringing, children singing ♪

I have an exciting announcement, people.

Christmas... is back.

After last year's debacle,

Sister Jude told you we'd never
celebrate Christmas here again.

Well, I say... "Bah Humbug."

We need a little Christmas, and luckily,

we are under new management.

Line up.

♪ So jump in bed ♪ Now!

♪ And cover your head... ♪

♪ 'Cause Santa Claus comes tonight... ♪
Let's go.

That mean old Grinch
tossed out all of our ornaments.

So, we'll need to improvise.

Mr. Deakins.

♪ Here comes Santa Claus,
here comes Santa Claus... ♪

You wear dentures, don't you?

♪ He'll come around
when chimes ring out ♪

♪ It's Christmas time again ♪

♪ Peace on Earth will come to all ♪

♪ If we just follow the light ♪

♪ So let's give thanks
to the Lord above ♪

♪ 'Cause Santa Claus comes tonight ♪

♪ Here comes Santa Claus,
here comes Santa Claus ♪

♪ Right down Santa Claus Lane ♪

♪ Vixen and Blitzen
and all his reindeer... ♪

You see?

We all make a little sacrifice

for the greater good.

That's the spirit

of Christmas.

♪ Peace on Earth will come to all ♪

♪ If we just follow the light ♪

♪ So let's give thanks
to the Lord above ♪

♪ 'Cause Santa Claus
comes tonight. ♪

O, Lord, I beg of you,

through your loving-kindness,

have mercy on the soul of Grace.

Through Christ our Lord.




I swear to you,

I'm gonna make things right.

You have my solemn word.

(sniffs, sighs)

Doctor, I've been thinking...

You want to be careful, Frank.

That can be dangerous.

I think we should call the police.

I think we should tell them
what happened,

about Kit Walker,

about Sister Felicity,

about that...

monster. And what about you?

You shot and killed

an unarmed woman, Frank.

Are you quite sure you want

to bring the authorities into this?

Yeah, I'm ready to face
whatever consequences

come from it.

I'll see what I can do.

("God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" playing)


I've been asking myself

how is it the Devil can
move so freely here

among the sacred icons?

How does a demon wear a crucifix

and not burn the flesh it inhabits?

And then I realized...

it's her.

You're using

Mary Eunice... her purity...
as a shield.

What if I were to slit this soft throat

and release her soul to Heaven,

then where would you go, foul thing?

Might just jump into you.

You made a big mistake coming back here.

No, you made a mistake.

And I'm about to send you back
to the hell that made you.

Yeah? What are you gonna do?

Cane the Devil out of me?

This demon, it tricks you.

(knocking on door)
Sister, may I have a word?

Dr. Arden...

(sighs) security.

We have an intruder.

You're making a mistake, Doctor.

Because you deny God, you can't see
the Devil right in front of you.

See that she doesn't
come back on the property.

We have a problem.

I can handle Jude.

I didn't mean Jude,

although I wouldn't underestimate her,

if I were you.

Our former Irish cop is feeling

the need to confess.

I've got it under control.

(hinges creaking)


Oh, Sister Jude.

I thought you never
wanted to see me again.

Jude is gone.

There's been a change in management.

Try to remain presentable.

There's a photographer coming

from the Gazette to take our picture.

I would like to see
bright, shining faces

delighting in your bag of chestnuts

and your new hymnal... Sister?

Gifts from the Monsignor himself.

The-The-These cuffs, huh?

They're heavy, and they dig in.

Where's your Christmas spirit, Sister?

What do you take
me for, an idiot? Huh?

You killed 18 people from
five families in one night.

You might expect to remain in irons

for the rest of your life.

Well, I don't want to be
in your shitty picture, then.

I don't want to be any
part of your damn lie.

Yeah, what lie is that?

Nothing like a picture
of happy, shiny faces

to take away the guilt
of locking us away.

You got that backwards,
Mr. Emerson.

The picture is to remind the public

that without Briarcliff,

you would be out there,
living among them.

And that's why you will
be front and center,


and under control.

What's he doing?

Who, Sean? He's handing out
the presents like you asked.

He's wearing that silly hat
and that ridiculous beard.

Now, I thought I very was clear

about how I wanted Christmas celebrated.

All respect, Sister, I really
don't see the problem with it.

The-The patients love it,

it makes Sean and the boys happy.

And St. Nicholas was a saint.

The photographer's here!

Sister Jude, the newspaper
photographer is here.

I thought we decided

that you would bring
him in when we were ready.

I'm sorry. Are we not ready?

(spitting, yelling)

Take him to the hole!

Oh, you really don't want me
out there with other people

this time of year.

Not as yourself.

Your beard goes perfectly

with the suit.

Jesus, you don't know
what Christmas means to me?

I do now, Leigh.

I know you were a petty criminal

thrown in jail for
shoplifting a loaf of bread,

and while you were in there,

the jailers went caroling
in the cell block,

and five men held you down

and took your virginity.


the first one did.

The others took your dignity,

and your self-esteem and...

most importantly...

Your Christmas spirit.

But then you got out

and you found the suit,

and it gave you everything
you were missing.

You see, I-I knew
who deserved to live

and who deserved to die.

Who was naughty, who was nice.

And you had the power, Leigh.

You can have it again.

Who do you want to be?

The victim...

...or the victor?

(door opens) ARDEN: Sister.

I hope I'm not interrupting.

Come on in, Arthur.

I was just thinking
about my Christmases.

There were so many of us

that all we got was a
tangerine and socks.

Did you celebrate Christmas
in your Nazi household?

We had wonderful Christmases
when I was a boy.

They're some of fondest
childhood memories.

And in that spirit,

I've brought you a Christmas present

since you've now become my family.

You're joking!

How adorable!

Is it Tabu perfume?

Open it.

I think you'll be pleased.

Well, knowing you, it's probably

some cheap toilet water
from the Woolworth's.

Yardley's Lavender.

Christ, why even get my hopes up.

Well... la-dee-da.

Mother of God, are they real?


Rubies are the most glamorous of all.

You couldn't have found them
in this dreary town.

Are they family heirlooms?

They belonged to a Jewess in the camp.

She was always reminding
people that she was

a woman of considerable means,
and that her husband was

an influential and
wealthy doctor in Berlin.

She was constantly complaining to me

about her stomach problems,

and as a doctor, I thought I
ought to do something about it.

So I followed her, one day,
to the latrine,

thinking I might diagnose her condition

if I had a stool sample.

She was in there,

on her hands and knees,

picking through her own feces

to retrieve those earrings.

She confessed to me
that she swallowed them

every day, day after day,

carrying them around inside of her,

as if, someday, she might return

to her former grandeur.

Poor, ridiculous woman,

she died from internal bleeding.

The earrings were
very hard on her intestines.

Obviously, I retrieved them.

I knew someday I'd meet
someone who was worthy

of their exceptional beauty.

You were very clever
to retrieve them, Arthur.

Look how beautiful they are on me.

They bring out the rose in my cheeks.


you're such a sap.


Not exactly for the reasons
you may think,

but a sap nonetheless.

I so dearly hoped you'd
throw them back in my face,

that you couldn't bring
yourself to touch

those shit-stained earrings.

I was hoping there'd be
a glimmer of horror,

a glimmer of that precious girl

who was too afraid

even to take a bite

of my candy apple...

You're pathetic.

And gee whiz,

I just hate to break it to you...

...but you're no angel either.

Now... I have work to do,

and you're either with me,

or you're against me.

And if you're against me,

even God can't help you.

The cook has a terrible habit

of forgetting to wash his hands.

I keep telling him...

I haven't eaten anything.

I'm just upset.

I need to know if Sister Mary
Eunice talked to the police.

If Sister Mary Eunice says
she's going to do something,

then you have to believe
it has been done.

You need to stop fretting.

(whispering voice)

KIT (muttering): You died.

Who is that back there?

Another unfortunate soul.

Nothing you need to
worry yourself about.

I feel much better.

Thank you.

(church bell tolling)

I don't know what to do for you, Jude.

You've lost your credibility
at Briarcliff.

I want to help you,
but I don't know how.

You've got to help me
get back into Briarcliff.

I don't know, Jude.

Look at me.

Don't I look different?

I'm not running anymore,

and God had a plan for me all along:

To be a soldier in His army,

but we're losing that war.

Did you know.

The National Broadcasting
Company is showing.

Rudolph the Red-Nosed
Reindeer this very week?

Nothing about Christ,

nothing about the nativity story.

This country's turn
towards unadulterated blasphemy

frightens me.

It worries me deeply,

but that's how the Devil works.

Bit by bit,

he turns our eyes away from God,

but he can't have her!


I will do what I can.

I promise, Jude.

(phone ringing)


(bell tolling)

Thank you.

You have a visitor.

(bell tolling)

I can't remember the last time
I was in a house of worship.

Why are you here?
You and I got off

on the wrong foot
right from the very beginning.

Perhaps it's because we're both such

strong personalities.

But although our ideologies may differ,

I believe our commitment

to Briarcliff is equally matched.

What is this?
I think you must know

how hard it was for me to come here,

to turn to you, of all people.

I don't have time for the prologue.

Just say it!

You were right.

About Sister Mary Eunice.

She's in desperate trouble.

I had hoped to come up

with a medical explanation
for it, but...

I can't.

(thud echoing)


She doesn't know I'm here.

You're afraid of her.

No. No?

That's not it.

I have my work to do.

I can't be baby-sitting
a deranged nun all day long.

That's what you came for?

A baby-sitter?

Yeah. Well, go to hell.

You were right about me, too.

I don't believe in God.

But I do believe in evil.

I've seen it...

up-close and personal.

I have no doubt.

That's why her purity meant
so much to me.

She had this...

light in her.

The light's gone out.


and that's not a word
I use often...

I'm begging you,

please help me.

I'm doing this for her, not you.

You must follow my every instruction.

No questions asked.

You swear to me?

I swear.

♪ O, holy night... ♪

There you go. Thank you.

♪ The stars are
brightly shining... ♪

(speaking quietly)
...Merry Christmas.

I'd like to present you all

with this star,

this... beacon

of Bethlehem.

It was hand-crafted
for the Archdiocese of Boston.

I've decided that this year,

it should hang on your tree.


Yes, please... (laughs)

What a triumph.

You've renewed these halls, Sister.

Even your tree shows imagination
and resourcefulness...

(gentle laugh)

...filled with the very icons
of their lives.

It reminds me of Marcel Duchamp
and the school

of found object art.

So clever and forward-thinking.

Just what's been missing.

Thank you, Monsignor.

I've had these ideas for a while.

Oh, and Leigh Emerson.


I must confess, I was more
than a little concerned

with your instincts to offer
him Christmas largesse.

Yes. But look at him.

A renewed soul.

What do you say, we blow this pop stand,

go savage a few elves and
then suck on each other, hmm?

MONSIGNOR: So, Arthur?


There is a palpable spirit
of love and joy in this room.

What say we put aside
our... difficulties

and celebrate
this successful transition?

Our young.

Sister Mary Eunice

is quite a treasure, isn't she?

That she is, more than
you can possibly imagine.

Frank, we need you up here, and, uh,

bring the ladder.

(Sister Mary Eunice sighs)

I want to hang this star

before the entertainment portion
of our party.

We are watching Rudolph
the Red-Nosed Reindeer tonight.

Oh, what a treat.

♪ Christmas ♪

♪ Snow's coming down... ♪

ALMA: Is it big?

(groans) Big enough to break my back.

♪ Christmas ♪

♪ Lots of leaves all around ♪

♪ Christmas ♪

♪ Baby, please come home... ♪

(groans) Hands off, woman.

I got a bun in that oven.

Really? I thought I was
just eating too much pie.

Keep eating.

I want that kid
to pop out fat and happy.

What if it's a girl?

But it's not.



♪ They're singing
deck the halls... ♪

But what if it is a girl?

Then I'll love her to the moon and back.

I just have a hunch.

I want to teach this kid baseball.

And football.

And how to change a tire.

What? I can't teach him.

Grace. (Laughs)

What's this about?
I'm so sorry, Grace.

I should have stayed gone.

If I hadn't come back...

Shh. Who cares about that?

Dance with me.

LANA (whispers): Kit...

Kit, can you hear me?

They're saying you escaped custody.

I heard on the radio there's a manhunt.

The police are still looking for you.

Oh, God.

If they don't know you're here,

they don't know
what happened to me, either.

No one is coming for either of us.

And he's still out there.


No, Kit.

It's Lana.
I haven't seen Grace.

I don't know where she is.



Grace is dead.

We have to get you out of here.

We both have to get out of here.

They've got you doped up.

I just have to get to a telephone.

I need to call the police.

They're gonna fry me.

No. No one is going
to fry you, Kit.

You're innocent, and I can prove it.

It was Thredson.


He murdered those women, not you.

He took me, Kit.

He showed me where he did it.

It was him.

That's why he got himself
appointed to your case...

to get you to confess to
crimes that he committed.

Did he hurt you?

They need to know.

They have to get there
before he does it again.

And before he destroys the evidence.

I have to get to the phone.


Are you really here?

I'm really here.

And I'm coming back.

You kept your word, Dr. Arden.

Where is Sister Mary Eunice now?

In the common room,
hosting a Christmas party.

She should be stopped,
for that reason alone.

You sure you don't need any help?

No. Only I can reach her.

I just need time.

Bring her to my office.

Lock the door.

And don't let anyone interrupt us.

Consider it done.

I never thought I would see it.

What's that?

The day you and I would work together.

Coming through.

(crowd chatter)

Sister Mary Eunice, you
really have stepped out

from the shadow of Sister Jude,

shining brighter
than anyone could imagine.

Thank you, Monsignor.

Oh, if you could stay
just a little bit longer,

Frank is about to put
your star on the tree.

Oh, no, Sister,
like the mythical jolly old elf,

I, too, have more than one visit
on this festive night, but

I am happy and grateful

to leave Briarcliff
in your capable hands.

Okay, hand me the star.




MAN: Get down!


Two steps forward, one step back.


Frank, you all right?

Yeah. I'm fine.

Can you take him to solitary?

I'd be glad to.


Get him up.

Turn him around.

FRANK: All right.

Sister Mary Eunice,
there's a pressing matter

in your office that
needs your attention.

(door creaks softly)

Hope you're not planning
on making a toll call.

Hey, Frankie, what about the outfit?

Sister's instructions were just
to throw you back in your hole.

Do not open until the next
Christmas after never.

Go rot in there, you bastard.

He give you any trouble?

No, Sister. Oh...

(whispers): I think he did.



how did this get in the building?

I pray we're not looking at a rampage.

(wheezing laugh)

(praying quietly)

(door closes)

What are you doing here?

I'm here to open my present.

♪ ♪

I trust now my loyalty
is no longer in question.

Ho, ho, ho.

(Leigh grunts)

(rattling doorknob)

(pounding on door)

Dr. Arden, open this door!

I'd put the lion's share of blame

on that sexy Little Sister.

She really

doesn't like you.
What's this all about?

You left me in that hole to rot.

But you're out now.

Anything is possible.

Let me pray with you.
I think I'd rather tell you

about my fantasies,

like the one where I jam

this gigantic crucifix
up your ass, or the other one

where I take my rotting teeth

and my foul-breathed mouth

and chomp down

on your dried-up...

Help me! Please!

Oh, Sister, where's your sense

of Christmas spirit?

I'm just beginning

to feel the comfort and joy!


Dear God, someone help me!

Anyone, help me!

Does this offend
your delicate sensibilities?

Actually, I find it rather tedious.

Now, if you'll excuse me,

I have more pressing
matters to take care of.

(sighs softly)

How did you find me?
Well, you were

in a car accident, Lana.

The details were in all the papers.

"Escaped mental patient returned

to ward."

You'll never get away with it,

not as long as I have a voice.

Is that what you were doing
on the phone?

You were going to call the police?

You know what I've been
doing since you left me?

I've been mourning.

You made me kill Bloody Face.

I've been through every inch

of my house with a toothbrush
cleaning up... no...

bone, no...

skin, no... drop
of blood escaped

my scrutiny, and the furnace

has been burning red-hot,
believe me.

You haven't made me disappear.

I'm a witness.

To the courts?

An unreliable one at best.

In fact, I was just gonna let you talk.

With no hard evidence, who
do you think they'll believe,

the doctor or the patient?
But then I thought

about how you betrayed me.

I opened my heart to you,

I told you my story,

and you used it to confuse me.

You made me give you

my intimacy, and that is a wrong

that I need to make right.

You're insane.

Everyone is gonna be able to see that.

I've lost so much recently, I feel like

I've been set adrift in
the open sea... but now...

that you're here...

so close to me again, well...

I feel like I've been found.

(Lana gasping)


(muffled shout) Shh.

Do you believe in fate, Lana?

Hmm? (Muffled sobbing)

We've been drawn together like
magnets, and I must admit

I didn't fully understand why until now.

But like the Phoenix,
who had to turn to ashes...

Bloody Face had to burn
so he could be born again.

And your skin...

will be the start of a
whole new Bloody Face.

(Lana wails)



LEIGH: It's just you

and me, Sister. God's off

having schnapps with the nice Santa.

I'm not the enemy.

You're not the only enemy,

you just happen to be the one
I'm focusing on right now.


("Carol of the Bells" playing)

(cane striking) (gasps, groans)

I take that back.

Maybe God is here,


he's giving me a sign.

("Carol of the Bells" continues)

(quietly): Oh, yeah.


My welts never healed.

No sunlight,

no medicine, no bathing,

and you never, (Sister Jude grunts)

ever checked on me!

Not once!

They're putrid now.

They're seeping pus.

Maybe I'll have you lick them
after I'm done, huh?

(Sister Jude groans)

Remember what you said? Huh?

We're going to soften you up

so God doesn't have to work so hard

to enter you with His light.

(cane striking)

Guess what?

There is no God.


But there is a Santa Claus.

(cane striking)

We have to kill him.


Wait, wait, wait a second...

Wait a second... stop it...

You have to let me do this.

We need him.

He's the only thing standing between me

and the electric chair.

Why is there still a manhunt?

Why haven't they turned you in?

(loud, harsh buzzing)


(gasping, groaning)


(buzzing stops)

("Carol of the Bells" fades in)


Are we having fun yet?

Have you softened up enough
to receive the light?

Except it won't be God...

and, actually, it won't be light.

(cane strikes, Sister Jude gasps)

LEIGH: Again!

(Leigh groans)

(gasps, groans weakly)

("Carol of the Bells" continuing)

This isn't going to work forever.

Look at the dust...
it's a junk room.

They practically never come in here.

But you're right... we'll have
to think of something.

I'll finish.

Get back to the infirmary
before they realize you're gone.

One day, I'll bury you.