Zhenitba Balzaminova (1965) - full transcript
Listening to the sweet sound of the crazy old woman's song "Dobraya, dobraya!" curly dreamer can't decide to marry.
Mosfilm Studios
BALZAMINOV'S MARRIAGE
a film comedy
based on A. Ostrovsky's trilogy
Written and Directed by
Konstantin Voinov
Director of Photography
G. Kupriyanov
Art Director F. Yasyukevich
Music by B. Tchaikovsky
Sound by V. Krachkovsky
The Cast:
Georgy Vitsin as Balzaminov
Lyudmila Shagalova as Balzaminova
Lidia Smirnova as the matchmaker
Ekaterina Savinova as Matryona
Zhanna Prokhorenko as Kapochka
Lyudmila Gurchenko as Ustinka
Tamara Nosova as Nichkina
Nikolay Kryuchkov as Neuedenov
Rolan Bykov as Chebakov
Inna Makarova as Anfisa
Nadezhda Rumyantseva as Raisa
Nonna Mordyukova as Belotelova
Dirt reads as wealth. It means gold.
You will be a man of wealth.
I wish it come true, mama!
I’ve seen so many dreams
in which I am well dressed
and have a lot of money,
and marry a rich lady.
Then I wake up and oops! I won't
believe in it anymore.
- One can't but believe in dreams.
- Just an illusion.
With your trying, you should have
long married a millionaire.
No luck. One should have a luck
even picking up mushrooms
not to say
of rich marriageable girls.
But what if I’m really fated
to meet my fortune?
Maybe it's waiting for me somewhere?
But where to seek for it?
It’s really tempting, mama, isn’t it?
Mama!
I'm a poor young man,
even a beggar.
A beggar by all accounts.
Now I am having a walk somewhere…
In dreams, I'm a dark-haired man
with moustache.
Well, I am having a walk
and suddenly I see a woman
or a girl at the window.
And the house she’s living in
is mine…
So I sit, like that, in the morning
and drink coffee
in a pink dressing gown...
Flowerets at my garden...
These dreams, my dear,
are just a smoke.
Oh, mama, why did you interrupt me?
You don't know what a pleasure
it is to dream!
Well, dream on, God be with you.
But your night dream was really good.
A holiday dream comes true
before lunch.
Let's wait. If it won't come true
before lunch, all for nothing,
and you should put it out
of your head.
Flowerets at my garden,
Please, I beg your pardon,
Ask to come my sweetheart now!
Is my heart to harden?
Night, I prey, you do not fail -
Bring my sweetheart in your shade.
And you also, nightingale,
Lure her with your serenade.
Now you help me, garden gate,
Squeak and quell my yearning.
Oh, my sweetheart, don’t be late,
With desire I’m burning!
My handsome one, what gifts
would you give in return?
- To whom?
- To me.
- What for?
- If you know much, you'll get old!
What gifts, you say?
I’ve got nothing.
Now you've got nothing, then you’ll
get a lot! What an eligible bachelor!
Piercing hearts, eh?
So cried Ivan the Fool: “Come quick,
my fleet-footed steed!
He got in one horse’s ear, came out
from another and became a prince.
A princess was sitting in her wooden
tower at the window;
and the prince jumped
on horseback up to the window
and kissed the princess
on her sweet lips.
And she applied her own seal
on his forehead, just to remember.
Misha, have you gone mad or what?
What if I can become an honorable man?
I'm getting mad about it.
Hanging would be too good
for Matryona!
God will provide!
Would you like some tea?
I've already had it four times today.
I stay in shape, but tea
is flat as flat can be.
Matryona, run to the shop!
What for?
We have all eatables.
What about vodka?
I don't refuse from anything.
Everything is good,
I'm not overnice about treats.
No need.
Once, at one’s house, they wanted
to mock at me
and gave me a glass
of eau-de-Cologne.
Well, all right. I drank it and
thanked them.
It couldn’t injure my health, could it?
Akulina Gavrilovna!
What is the pleasant news?
Don't you know?
Who but you captivated her,
so you must know better.
The girl is lovesick. They saw
the trouble and sent for me.
It’s not for the first time I’m doing
this job of an envoy.
So if we think better,
we, matchmakers,
should be promoted to high ranks!
Without us, it would be the end!
Human race would stop existing.
On whose behalf, Akulina Gavrilovna?
Where do you stroll from morning till
night? Don't you know?
He walks under her window
and she making eyes at him.
You came on behalf of the Nichkins?!
Right you are!
- What's up with him?
- It’s because of love.
It could have been worse.
Love is cruel for heart.
Nothing’s more terrible.
People shed blood for infidelity!
Enough.
Why did they send you to us?
To make acquaintance.
You are to come tonight.
They invite you kindly to have
a dish of tea.
- Dear me!
- Love is in effect!
I wonder, what about her dowry?
The golden girl. 300.000 in silver
inherited from her father!
- I'll die! I'll go mad!
- Look, how it seized him.
And she is such a beauty.
A real peach.
That the dream comes true, mama.
I warned you! Why are you curling
your hair?
You look nicer in a natural way.
I'm not a hairdresser. What do you
expect from me?
- I asked to curl hair, not ears!
- Why do you grow them that long?
You could go to the hairdresser.
Look, mama. Hanging would
be too good for her!
- Where is my pencil?
- Why do I know?
What a scribe you are losing your pencil?
I am not a scribe!
Your pencil is like a gun for a soldier.
Do soldiers lose their guns?
Mama!
Now I have a salary 120 rubles annually.
We are living on it, right?
But what if it would be 300.000?
A thousand per year... I can live
on it for 300 years, right?
Oh my! Dear me!
Do you want to live for 300 years?
Why? If one enjoys his life,
maybe he could?
And what if I will spend 2.000
per year?
It'll be enough for 150 years.
Mama!
I'll go and sit in the courtyard.
I need a whiff of breeze
when I think so hard about life.
Misha! Don't think!
It'll be worse.
There are some French words
sounding like Russian ones.
- You learn them.
- What words?
Well, you say: “I'll go
for a walk”. That’s not good.
- Say: “I'll take a promenade!”
- Yes, promenade is better.
I know a lot of such words.
Let me go!
Misha!
How would you say if
someone is not worth your attention?
- Trash.
- That's impolite.
You must say in French “goltepas”!
Goltepas? A good word.
If someone is putting on airs and
you want to pull him up -
- it is called “assager”.
- Assager?
A good word as well.
Oh, I'm so afraid!
- I'm afraid.
- What are you afraid of, my dear?
I'm always afraid of the men
I fall in love with.
What are you afraid of?
Do they bite?
They should better speak openly
and not beat about the bush,
for I don’t know what to answer,
and I can't hide my feelings.
- I may lose them all in the end!
- Don't be afraid. I am with you.
- Oh, I'll die!
- Don't sigh so hard. Seams may burst.
Uncle! This way you will frighten
my suitor away!
- What suitor? Go off.
- You shouldn't take that tone
with young ladies! It’s bad manners.
- Who is that?
- My friend.
- Of a noble family?
- Of merchants.
- Small fry.
- What a boor!
I'm so afraid!
Kapochka would advise you
to be more daring with her!
She's very timid.
You don't be shy!
We're simple people.
- Where is her mother?
- She changes.
Ah, I'm afraid of you!
Don't come close to me!
Why such disfavor, may I ask?
- Girls must never trust men.
- But I can restrain myself.
Everybody says so but it happens
in the opposite way.
I do not blame men.
They get everything easy.
But girls must fear their inclination
for falling in love.
What do you like more: winter
or summer?
- Summer. You can stroll in summer.
- You can sleigh in winter.
What berries do you like more?
- What about you?
- Strawberries with cream.
- I like gooseberries.
- How can it be? They’re thorny!
Why are we so submissive?
Men can do anything with us.
How can I dare without your favor?
What do you think, who is
better: man or woman?
Chicken is not a bird,
woman is not a human.
Mama, don't bring shame on you!
They say, you know,
there are such strong horses
that will never overstrain
themselves. My dear sir...
How was everything
between the two of you?
It is so adorable when my friends
indulge in confidences with me!
One minute - and I'm lost forever!
- Do you read newspapers?
- I do.
Have you read anything about
Napoleon?
- Is he marching at Moscow again?
- Not at all.
He is settling down at a new place.
Decorating rooms in his palace.
Thank God! This way, please.
Well, they say that Tsar Pharaoh
is coming out of the sea
with his troops at night!
He comes out and goes away again!
- Isn’t it before the end of time?
- It's very possible.
How to live in this world?
How horrible!
Hard times are coming!
They say a certain White Arab
is rising against us.
He leads 200 million troops!
- Off you go, I'll call you later.
- Where is that White Arab from?
- From White Arabia.
- Papers don’t tell much about it.
Such times!
Isn’t your suit too tight for you?
According to the fashion.
He is always dressed
according to the fashion.
My mama.
Did you hear - there is some
comet or planet descending on us.
Scientists looked at the sky
through a metroscope
and calculated with accuracy,
to the last digit,
on what day and at what hour
it will land on the Earth.
Oh God! Is it possible to evade
any God's planet
when every man has his own destiny?
- What are you talking about?
- What should we talk about?
- Don't bring shame on you.
- Do you read poetry?
I read mostly sentimental poems
which express love
and all kind of anguish.
You know there is so much poetry now
that expresses nothing.
So, I’m not interested in that.
Recite something to us, we will listen.
I’ve got a notebook for poetry
at home,
I put my verses down in it.
If you wish, I shall bring it.
Only now it’s impossible
to find good poetry.
Angry shepherd
Smelt… like peppered.
Yushka!
Bring me a stone to crack nuts!
Brother!
Here are our new acquaintances!
Hello, dear sir.
Would you like some tea?
Melanya! Tea!
- Do you serve?
- I do, sir.
Good, sir. To each his own, sir.
A trader trades, a serviceman serves,
an idler idles about.
I want to talk to you about our
trading business.
In our trading business…
- money is an important thing.
- Everyone likes to have money.
Who likes it, he should make it.
It is hard to make money nowadays.
Especially if a man is with good
taste, so he has to suffer -
he wants to live exquisitely, but,
alas... Take, for example, me…
A man who can’t get anything
shouldn’t live at all, nothing to say
about living in wealth.
- What are they to do then?
- To do dirty work, to dig ground.
- What rank do you have, dear sir?
- The first, sir.
A long way to General for you!
- How much are you paid?
- 120 rubles.
So, in one pocket it’s getting dark,
in the other it’s dawning.
In Tartar it’s “yuck”,
in Russian it’s “naught”.
Some tea, brother?
Dear sir!
Well, dear sir,
my sister is a damned fool.
- Gee, brother…
- What’s up with your gee?
- I’m not a horse to gee me up!
- Brother!
Most of all I'm afraid
that she'll find a match
as stupid as she is herself.
Oh God! They have such a fortune
no son-in-law will spend for ages!
They can make a poor man happy.
The money was made by her husband
not for her wasting and spending it.
- Money makes business go around!
- Yes.
Let her marry off her daughter,
- but I’m sorry for the money.
- I’m sorry, too!
Some young men are worth
2 kopecks in banknotes,
but he’ll dupe some silly girl
and would then show off:
Give me, he says, this much money!
Give me the best dowry!
After such words we've got nothing
to do here!
Mama!
I do not take these words personally.
Please, do take them personally.
Your mama is smarter.
She got my train of thought.
I am not after big money.
I’d be happy to have anything.
If you have not a kopeck,
any ruble is a fortune for you!
- So, good-bye! I didn’t expect it.
- Farewell.
- Thank you for your hospitality.
- You are welcome.
Come again! Life is dull
without fools!
Uncle, I’ll die just now!
Feign you have swooned.
- What is it?
- Nothing!
It will pass.
Didn't I tell you, yours was
a dream on the eve of the feast.
Had I seen it on a weekday,
that would be quite another thing.
Well, mama, if only I were a general…
These dreams are like a smoke.
You have again interrupted me. Why?
And at the most interesting moment…
In you go, shameless man! In you go!
Garrison detachment, fall in!
Recover bunches!
Have you gone mad or what?
Matryona!
Hello, good lady!
Don’t order to behead me,
but order to speak up!
You know there are people
that never have any shame.
Go!
We are little people, but have
clear conscience.
My conscience is
purer than gold or crystal!
You fell into such discomfiture,
it can't be helped.
But I will make up for it.
I expect nothing
but mockery from you.
If I feel guilty, I’ll do everything
to amend. My soul is of that kind.
Although it’s hard to live with
such virtue these days.
I don’t trust you. We’re poor people,
what interest you have in us?
I'll tell you what... Whoa!
A smart suitor will find a girl
without any matchmaker,
but your son is nothing without me,
so I’ll charge a good fee.
Everyone acts in his own interest.
What a dish I have in view now!
She is a rich widow, and is very
bored because of it.
She feels kind of a burden,
it’s like an illness.
She called in a doctor, of course.
And the doctor said that she needs
no medicine,
but only some amusement
and to get married.
- And so?
- She gave him three rubles.
I am about her marriage.
She said she was not against it,
but it’s hard to find a man,
being a home-sitter.
But what I am for? And she
asked me to take up her case.
What about her fortune?
Beyond any limits!
Matryona! Cabby, turn about!
Get in!
Misha!
Misha, my handsome one,
are you well?
We are. With our bulls and cows
returning you graceful bows.
Enough!
I found a girl for you!
Well, no need.
The end will be the same!
I have found one myself.
- Where?
- I won’t tell you!
- Nothing will come out it!
- We'll live and see!
Consider this: what kind of girl
you might need?
Me? An ordinary one.
No, not ordinary.
Listen to me. You are stupid...
- Oh, yes! Tell me another!
- Trust my words!
I'm a woman of experience.
I won’t cheat you.
Why are you so glad to argue about
everything, Mikhail Dmitrich?
Why shouldn't I argue
if she's calling me a fool!
She knows better.
So what she says is true!
What do you want from me?
- Be quiet!
- I am quiet.
You're stupid. You needn’t a girl
that is smarter than you, right?
- Of course!
- So we look for a sillier one.
Why are you pestering me?
You came to make fun of me!
- Just you wait!
- And what will you do?
I know what to do!
I’ll bring you to court!
Me - to court?
Are you in your right mind?
- You think I'm scared? Oh my!
- Akulina!
Good people!
Get up! Let’s go to law!
- What court you’ll bring me to?
- It’s my business!
We’ll have a special court and
you’ll have a verdict in no time!
I don't care!
What vices of mine are you going
to prove?
You are...
You’ll never find the words!
And I will say this and that…
They will write me a privilege
on paper!
What privilege?
Against you!
That I be better than you,
and higher in all things!
- Madam!
- I’ll never come here till my death!
Because, my friend, it is
not bread following the belly.
Let's go!
Hanging would be too good for you!
Go to hell you all.
I have tracked him down,
where he goes to.
- And?
- Not far from here.
He doesn’t go straight,
but in a roundabout way
so that the neighbors
couldn’t guess.
If only it turned out well!
I think he will not succeed
there, either.
- Why do you think so?
- Not a fine figure of a man.
Nothing to be tempted with.
A clerk of low rank.
- Who are they?
- The Pezhenovs.
What are they?
- Their own masters.
- How so?
- Well, in their own right.
- Stupid you are!
Are they civil servants
or merchants?
- In trade, I think.
- And what about girls?
Two sisters, both single.
They are cooped up there,
like under lock and key.
- Why so?
- The brothers ordered.
- What for?
- Very shameless towards men.
It’s terrible what a weakness
they have for men!
Balzaminov! What’s up with you?
I am waiting for you!
- Go round, I'll be right out.
- I’m, Lukyan Lukyanich...
- Sorry, Lukyan Lukyanich.
- Not good, I'm...
Wait, wait!
What is that? Asinchuk’s, eh?
So handsome! All right, you go.
Why do you look uneasy, eh?
Enough! Tell me whether you’ll do
what you promised, eh?
- Certainly.
- That's right. What?
Wait-wait! Get’im! Get’im!
So, as agreed?
Well, what I have promised…
Tell me another! I know people
of your sort.
So now, Balzaminov,
- you change into a shoemaker.
- Why?
You must look like a shoemaker.
He gave his consent.
How can you get in otherwise?
And now…
you ring at the gate…
they open it…
and you say that you came to young
ladies to take measurements.
It’s all agreed. And they lead you
to them right away.
What then?
- Are you in love or not?
- In love.
Then you must open your heart,
and hand in a letter.
You must give this letter to my girl
and declare your love to yours.
Tell her you’ll drive her away,
but you don’t confuse
my elder one with your younger one.
My Anfisa with your Raisa.
For mercy's sake, how can I?
Have you, Lukyan Lukyanich,
opened your heart already?
Me? Long ago!
And when will we drive them away, sir?
As soon as they agree.
But we must not be mistaken about...
About money?
No, I never make
mistakes in such matters.
- That’s you, but me…
- The sisters have it in equal parts.
The brothers don’t marry
them off because of the money.
Look! A real cobbler!
- I'm a shoemaker.
- Look, very much the same!
Very much, yes. Some shoemaker!
Wait-wait!
Look, Balzaminov, I even envy you.
What a handsome steed! Stop, I say!
Well, make him rear up!
I even envy you, Balzaminov!
You will be talking
with your beloved girl,
and I'll have to suffer alone.
Take the letter.
Come on! Come on!
Stop! Stop!
Listen, Balzaminov,
but what if your chief will know
that you make shoes?
It’s not good. My colleagues
will wonder, too.
And what if you will be flogged, eh?
Flogged!
What is this?
Lukyan Lukyanich, I won’t go.
You yourself send me there
and say that I’ll be flogged!
I meant it as a joke.
Don’t you like jokes, eh?
Don’t confuse my Anfisa
with your Raisa.
- I do not care much.
- Off you go!
What a nincompoop! A perfect fool.
He fancies that
they will fall in love with him.
However, if you look at life
philosophically,
such people are very helpful.
Whom else can you make change
into a shoemaker?
I can have 1.500 rubles,
if it turns out well.
Let me go, please…
Listen… let me go.
- What a bore, Anfisa!
- What a bore, Raisa!
- Oh Lord, how dull it is here!
- It makes me feel like howling.
You must get married Anfisa as soon
as possible and be free.
To get married to whom?
I'd rather die than be married
to those boors our brothers bring.
I am sick of ignorance at home.
- We are to blame ourselves, too.
- How come?
When our dad had died...
we kind of let our hair down.
That was a golden time!
Memorable moments.
Khimka! Play “Galop”!
Khimka! Come on!
Anfiska, Raiska, stop your gallop!
Let's go in to sleep on.
I thought much and have thought of
- eloping with Lukyan Lukyanich.
- What? How can you!
What of it? I'll just
go out, and farewell.
Do I feel sorry for anybody here?
While we live here, the brothers
have power over us,
but as soon as we are out,
it's all over.
And then I shall demand
the money I inherited.
- It seems scary to be abducted.
- Not a bit, Raisa.
- I had already been taken away.
- I remember
- as you came back before long.
- Snake!
Let bygones be bygones.
He has come!
The shoemaker has come.
What shoe…
What shoe…
What shoemaker?
I don’t know.
He says he was sent by his friend
to take measurements.
- Where are the brothers?
- They went in to sleep.
- Go open the gate!
- They will scold you.
Do it!
But how brave you are!
Love overcomes everything.
Khimka, go and stand on watch!
If somebody is awake, let us know.
Have you seen Lukyan Lukyanich?
I have a letter from him.
Give it to me.
I have got everything ready.
You have seen many
proofs of my love.
For your sake I abandoned
the society and all my connections.
I forgot all the pleasures of life
and am living for more than a year
in this wild land
where only bears
and Balzaminovs can live.
If you want us both to be happy,
tonight, when it gets dark
and your folks go to bed,
you go out into the garden.
In the side street
at the back of your garden,
I will be waiting for you
in a carriage.
Your garden fence is bad
at one place.
We will tear some planks off
and you will be free.
We will drive fifteen miles
to a place
where my friends are waiting
and everything is ready,
even music.
Oh, Raisa, what a noble man he is!
He steals me away, and all is ready,
even music.
Well, who but a gentleman can
behave like that?
- Will you go, Anfisa?
- Of course I will!
It would be impolite not to.
But you might still enjoy
your life here.
In that case, I feel sorry
for my proposal to elope with me…
Why does he think so low about us?
If you will not venture to flee tonight,
then tomorrow…
...tomorrow I will leave
to the Caucasus.
I am so grateful to you, Mister
Balzaminov.
Please wait for my answer.
Sorry to have kept you waiting.
Not at all! It’s very nice!
- Where did she go?
- To write an answer.
Will it be soon?
We do nothing too soon,
it’s not our habit.
And besides letters,
we write nothing.
Off you go!
I feel miserable nowadays…
- So do us!
- You, maybe, not because of…
Because we are locked up and
have no entertainment!
- I have another reason…
- What is your reason?
Of a night, I cannot even
- sleep!
- Maybe you sleep in the daytime?
No. Not because of that,
but because of my sentiments…
I feel as if… I am...
the most miserable man in the world.
You don't say so! A man is always
happier than a woman.
The woman is unhappy because
she is always in somebody’s power.
But men’s unhappiness
results from love.
And who is the lady who happened
to fascinate you?
Maybe it’ll be unpleasant
for you to hear it?
Not in the least,
quite on the contrary!
In that case, I should say that
you are that lady!
Well, I never! I did not expect this!
No words to express my love!
I would like to express it, but…
I can’t.
- And when did you fall in love?
- On Thursday last week.
- Quite recently!
- I can love longer!
Maybe you are a frivolous person?
I consider this as meanness in men.
Well, if so, would you agree to elope
with me?
Lukyan Lukyanich wants
to take away your sister,
so I could do it together with him.
Goodbye, Mr. Balzaminov!
Here is the letter!
Brothers… woke up!
Hurry!
- Get off!
- Get off!
Sit and help yourself!
Away!
How soon will you find a suitor
for me?
Very soon, my beauty.
Find a good one!
Even if he were undersea
I’ll get him from the bottom
of the sea for your pleasure.
But you, too, be kind
to repay my errands.
I’ll do. I am kind.
She is kind. She is kind.
What Moscow is talking about?
People talk much, but you
can’t believe everything.
Isn’t there a new war declared?
Peace has been made everywhere.
Though it’s rumored the earth
is shaking in some places.
Not good!
Well, for your precaution,
they say that
- a gang of robbers showed up.
- Where from?
From deep forests, it is said.
They have iron claws on hands
and they walk on stilts.
Their chief is dressed like a Turk.
Why on stilts?
For speed and for horror.
A cock-and-bull story, maybe?
It’s true, you can trust me.
Well, look at the fence.
On their stilts they can jump
over even that high fence!
Akulina Gavrilovna!
Holy saints! You scared me to death!
My heart even gave a jump!
Devil take you!
- Where am I?
- How did you get here?
- Help me out of here!
- Barbarian, what you have done!
With our ample forms, we must be
careful not to die of fright!
What if we’ll tie you up and take
to police?
- Why?
- Do not jump over fences!
Look, how you frightened
my mistress!
I wonder whether she is alive
or not out there!
- What an unlucky man I am!
- Don’t try to evoke pity!
She is widow for five years!
And she wants to get married now.
She has all her rights to sue you
for disgrace,
and you’ll be tried and sent
to the land of no return!
Do not frighten me!
I’ll give you all you want.
- Two thousand rubles!
- Where can I get it?
You’ll have it. But you should
listen to me and do as I tell you!
Now come to the mistress
and say that you are in love.
She’s a widow and is rich
beyond limits. Got it?
- I’ll shower you with gifts!
- Tomorrow we’ll sign a deal.
You only say: “I am in love!” and
kiss the hand.
Not mine! Go wash yourself
and come to her!
Never mind! It’s a friend
of the mistress got by mistake.
Domna Evstigneevna!
Do not be afraid!
It’s a friend got by mistake.
- Why did you...?
- In love.
- And why over the fence?
- Moved by sentiments.
You are not angry with me?
I am never angry. I am kind.
- What are you doing?
- Me? Nothing.
So am I.
It’s so boring to do nothing all alone.
- It’s happier if together.
- Much more!
Do you want it together?
I would be all happy!
May I kiss your hand, please?
Very well...
Come close.
I will so…
You love me, so I will love you, too!
Much obliged, ma'am!
Oh, how cold…
how cold is the water in your pool!
The samovar is still warm, isn’t it?
I like him.
- You make him…
- I’d rather go home.
Make him come to me every day!
All is in our hands.
She’s a little too plump, eh?
Now you start talking? Off you go!
What? Through the gate! Don’t be
afraid, no one will touch you!
Kiss the hand.
O Lord!
I feel much happier now!
Mother of God and Virgin, rejoice!
Pass, pass…
Boy!
Matryona!
Matryona!
Do we have a fortune teller,
a cheap one, living not far?
What do you want to ask her about?
About life, happiness, all this.
There is one, dealing with
lost things.
But she never mentions
a thief's name.
They’d ask: “Who has stolen this?”
And she’d kind of conjure
and says
to blame a black-haired man
or a pocked one.
Though she’s telling lies mostly
in her old age.
- I don’t need this kind.
- There's no other around!
What a place we live in!
You can never find anything
you really need!
- And who reads the cards around?
- I don’t know.
What an inattentive woman you are!
You have no curiosity
about the world.
I don’t want to get my fortune told.
I do not expect any heaps of gold.
So I can live without
any fortune telling.
Well, mama, it's done.
I saw the girl
and the woman the matchmaker
proposed, too.
- I'll marry her!
- Whom?
Both.
What? Are you a Tartar or what?
Come to your senses!
Mama!
I’ll hire a butler and fire Matryona
for rudeness!
This girl, how much does she have?
- A hundred and fifty thousand!
- And she agreed to marry you!
Both agreed. But the first one
wants to be taken away
and the second one, well… at home.
You know what came to my mind,
mama?
If they give away that garden
for the Pezhenov girl
it would be possible
to pull down the fence,
for their gardens are neighboring,
and make a single park
with various pavilions and alleys...
Do you really want to marry
both of them?
You are interrupting me again!
I could have dreamed at last!
Never mind, dream on!
Some might not even speak with
his mother
on getting such a wealth!
But I talk with you of whatever
you want.
No matter that I am rich.
I treat you with reverence.
And which of them is more beautiful?
For me, mama, all rich women
are beauties. I can see no difference
somehow.
No light!
In the dark I can dream better.
Now I can fancy myself as I like -
now in a big
and beautiful chamber,
now in a carriage, in a garden…
But if you bring a candle, I will see
this poor room and all is lost.
Dream on!
No, I can feel that things
get confused in my head;
it’s even getting weird!
It’s because I’m not used to think
as a richman.
I always had thoughts of a poor man,
and now all this richness
doesn’t fit into my head.
Mama, what if I would build
a tower so high
that we can see all Moscow at once!
I can keep pigeons in the tower.
- What?
- Oh, my dear.
Sorry, ma’am.
- I am here, Lukyan Lukyanich!
- It's time!
- Misha, where are you to?
- To the Pezhenovs.
I delivered a letter in which it was
said we will take them away tonight.
- You’ve made up your mind?
- No.
Because if I marry one of them,
I’ll have to lose the other, right?
- Why are you going then?
- What will be, will be!
I should try my fortune in any way!
- What shall I do, sir?
- I'll teach you!
And where are the ladies usually
brought when taken away?
Anywhere!
- And where’s my carriage?
- You'll learn later.
Gee up!
Respectable people, who wish
themselves well,
go to the madhouse to see Ivan
because of every trifle!
They take counsel! And we are
marring off without any advice!
They say that even a stick
can shoot once!
And you’ll come to live with us!
We’ll have a good time together!
- I'll pick up a serviceman, too!
- And what about this blond?
- You must be mad!
- Why are you flirting with him then?
Out of boredom!
Farewell, Balzaminov!
I’ll add you to my list of names
remembered before God!
- When are we going to elope?
- Go away from me!
I‘m bored with you to death!
Help! Help!
It’s all because you never
seek advice.
Why couldn’t you think of where
you take her to and in what?
I was counting upon
Lukyan Lukyanich!
That's all he needs to get into now!
Every tub must stand
on its own bottom!
If truth be told, mama,
I was as if in a daze.
It seemed the carriage would come
out of the blue,
- and I would bring her to us!
- To this apartment?
You wouldn’t believe it,
but when I was thinking
of taking her away, I fancied
we had our own stone house!
It’s a pity that things are
like that, all wrong,
when the rich marry the rich
and the poor marry the poor.
Is there any justice?
If I were the Tsar...
The Tsar's decree!
The rich marry the poor
and the poor marry the rich!
And the one who disobeys
must be beheaded!
Matroyna, can you read dreams?
Why should I? Anything
can happen in a dream.
There can be any changes
in people's lives!
One comes out
of poverty into wealth,
yet others -
out of wealth into poverty.
I have not yet seen such changes.
Richmen live in wealth as before.
and the poor, despite
any changes, are still poor.
Such a strange dream!
It’s a kind of festivities
with people strolling…
- It means snow.
- In August?
- Then it is rain.
- No, not rain.
- Then I don’t know what.
- If so, shut your mouth.
- I shut it.
- And keep it shut.
- And then I see as it sails away…
- What?
- A ship.
- Money would melt away!
- But at first I see a bridge…
- Bridge reads as moving!
Don’t interrupt me! And beyond
the bridge there is China!
I don’t know what it means.
But China is neither land,
nor a town.
It looks like a nice house! But
it has a signboard “China”.
And there come out of the house
not Chinese men or women,
but Misha, and he says:
“Mama, come here, into China”.
And I am kind of going to come,
but people start crying:
“Don’t go! He’s lying!”
China, they say, is not there.
It is on our side.
I turn round and see that China
is really on our side!
Just the same!
And Misha is so cheerful.
He is dancing and singing:
“I’ll go to China to have fun!”
What does it mean?
Even if my life were at stake
I couldn’t tell you what it meant.
That woman the matchmaker proposed
has a shop in Kitay-gorod which
sounds like China town, that’s all.
- Mama!
- What?
Tell me, in which month I was born?
- In May!
- So I may fool about all my life.
Soon the matchmaker will come
and bring such news
you can be off your head with!
I never take chasers.
I have no such stupid habit.
Because I'm a educated woman,
very educated.
I was well educated by my late
husband.
Ask me what I hadn’t been
beaten with?
With a poker,
with a stovelength…
thrown against the stove, but, no,
not beaten with the stove.
Mikhail Dmitrich!
Mikhail Dmitrich!
I have come from far away.
I went by towns and villages,
by deep forests,
by thick bushes,
by steep river banks!
My throat is dry,
my tongue is tired!
And there shot the prince
a white swan with his arrow!
I have the honor to report, that
you may get married any day!
Stop! Stop!
Just a moment!
Mama!
You watch now lest I do
something with myself!
What is it, mama?
Am I not a Balzaminov any more,
but another man?
And you said that I was a fool.
I won’t go back on my words!
Misha, don’t take offence,
you needn’t be smart!
Let you live happily!
Having money, we can live
very well as it is!
Mama, previously I felt hurt
that I was neither rich, nor smart!
And now let them speak
that I am a fool!
Let them speak! I am a fool!
A fool!
Flowerets at my garden,
Please, I beg…
Translated by Alexander Kormashov
BALZAMINOV'S MARRIAGE
a film comedy
based on A. Ostrovsky's trilogy
Written and Directed by
Konstantin Voinov
Director of Photography
G. Kupriyanov
Art Director F. Yasyukevich
Music by B. Tchaikovsky
Sound by V. Krachkovsky
The Cast:
Georgy Vitsin as Balzaminov
Lyudmila Shagalova as Balzaminova
Lidia Smirnova as the matchmaker
Ekaterina Savinova as Matryona
Zhanna Prokhorenko as Kapochka
Lyudmila Gurchenko as Ustinka
Tamara Nosova as Nichkina
Nikolay Kryuchkov as Neuedenov
Rolan Bykov as Chebakov
Inna Makarova as Anfisa
Nadezhda Rumyantseva as Raisa
Nonna Mordyukova as Belotelova
Dirt reads as wealth. It means gold.
You will be a man of wealth.
I wish it come true, mama!
I’ve seen so many dreams
in which I am well dressed
and have a lot of money,
and marry a rich lady.
Then I wake up and oops! I won't
believe in it anymore.
- One can't but believe in dreams.
- Just an illusion.
With your trying, you should have
long married a millionaire.
No luck. One should have a luck
even picking up mushrooms
not to say
of rich marriageable girls.
But what if I’m really fated
to meet my fortune?
Maybe it's waiting for me somewhere?
But where to seek for it?
It’s really tempting, mama, isn’t it?
Mama!
I'm a poor young man,
even a beggar.
A beggar by all accounts.
Now I am having a walk somewhere…
In dreams, I'm a dark-haired man
with moustache.
Well, I am having a walk
and suddenly I see a woman
or a girl at the window.
And the house she’s living in
is mine…
So I sit, like that, in the morning
and drink coffee
in a pink dressing gown...
Flowerets at my garden...
These dreams, my dear,
are just a smoke.
Oh, mama, why did you interrupt me?
You don't know what a pleasure
it is to dream!
Well, dream on, God be with you.
But your night dream was really good.
A holiday dream comes true
before lunch.
Let's wait. If it won't come true
before lunch, all for nothing,
and you should put it out
of your head.
Flowerets at my garden,
Please, I beg your pardon,
Ask to come my sweetheart now!
Is my heart to harden?
Night, I prey, you do not fail -
Bring my sweetheart in your shade.
And you also, nightingale,
Lure her with your serenade.
Now you help me, garden gate,
Squeak and quell my yearning.
Oh, my sweetheart, don’t be late,
With desire I’m burning!
My handsome one, what gifts
would you give in return?
- To whom?
- To me.
- What for?
- If you know much, you'll get old!
What gifts, you say?
I’ve got nothing.
Now you've got nothing, then you’ll
get a lot! What an eligible bachelor!
Piercing hearts, eh?
So cried Ivan the Fool: “Come quick,
my fleet-footed steed!
He got in one horse’s ear, came out
from another and became a prince.
A princess was sitting in her wooden
tower at the window;
and the prince jumped
on horseback up to the window
and kissed the princess
on her sweet lips.
And she applied her own seal
on his forehead, just to remember.
Misha, have you gone mad or what?
What if I can become an honorable man?
I'm getting mad about it.
Hanging would be too good
for Matryona!
God will provide!
Would you like some tea?
I've already had it four times today.
I stay in shape, but tea
is flat as flat can be.
Matryona, run to the shop!
What for?
We have all eatables.
What about vodka?
I don't refuse from anything.
Everything is good,
I'm not overnice about treats.
No need.
Once, at one’s house, they wanted
to mock at me
and gave me a glass
of eau-de-Cologne.
Well, all right. I drank it and
thanked them.
It couldn’t injure my health, could it?
Akulina Gavrilovna!
What is the pleasant news?
Don't you know?
Who but you captivated her,
so you must know better.
The girl is lovesick. They saw
the trouble and sent for me.
It’s not for the first time I’m doing
this job of an envoy.
So if we think better,
we, matchmakers,
should be promoted to high ranks!
Without us, it would be the end!
Human race would stop existing.
On whose behalf, Akulina Gavrilovna?
Where do you stroll from morning till
night? Don't you know?
He walks under her window
and she making eyes at him.
You came on behalf of the Nichkins?!
Right you are!
- What's up with him?
- It’s because of love.
It could have been worse.
Love is cruel for heart.
Nothing’s more terrible.
People shed blood for infidelity!
Enough.
Why did they send you to us?
To make acquaintance.
You are to come tonight.
They invite you kindly to have
a dish of tea.
- Dear me!
- Love is in effect!
I wonder, what about her dowry?
The golden girl. 300.000 in silver
inherited from her father!
- I'll die! I'll go mad!
- Look, how it seized him.
And she is such a beauty.
A real peach.
That the dream comes true, mama.
I warned you! Why are you curling
your hair?
You look nicer in a natural way.
I'm not a hairdresser. What do you
expect from me?
- I asked to curl hair, not ears!
- Why do you grow them that long?
You could go to the hairdresser.
Look, mama. Hanging would
be too good for her!
- Where is my pencil?
- Why do I know?
What a scribe you are losing your pencil?
I am not a scribe!
Your pencil is like a gun for a soldier.
Do soldiers lose their guns?
Mama!
Now I have a salary 120 rubles annually.
We are living on it, right?
But what if it would be 300.000?
A thousand per year... I can live
on it for 300 years, right?
Oh my! Dear me!
Do you want to live for 300 years?
Why? If one enjoys his life,
maybe he could?
And what if I will spend 2.000
per year?
It'll be enough for 150 years.
Mama!
I'll go and sit in the courtyard.
I need a whiff of breeze
when I think so hard about life.
Misha! Don't think!
It'll be worse.
There are some French words
sounding like Russian ones.
- You learn them.
- What words?
Well, you say: “I'll go
for a walk”. That’s not good.
- Say: “I'll take a promenade!”
- Yes, promenade is better.
I know a lot of such words.
Let me go!
Misha!
How would you say if
someone is not worth your attention?
- Trash.
- That's impolite.
You must say in French “goltepas”!
Goltepas? A good word.
If someone is putting on airs and
you want to pull him up -
- it is called “assager”.
- Assager?
A good word as well.
Oh, I'm so afraid!
- I'm afraid.
- What are you afraid of, my dear?
I'm always afraid of the men
I fall in love with.
What are you afraid of?
Do they bite?
They should better speak openly
and not beat about the bush,
for I don’t know what to answer,
and I can't hide my feelings.
- I may lose them all in the end!
- Don't be afraid. I am with you.
- Oh, I'll die!
- Don't sigh so hard. Seams may burst.
Uncle! This way you will frighten
my suitor away!
- What suitor? Go off.
- You shouldn't take that tone
with young ladies! It’s bad manners.
- Who is that?
- My friend.
- Of a noble family?
- Of merchants.
- Small fry.
- What a boor!
I'm so afraid!
Kapochka would advise you
to be more daring with her!
She's very timid.
You don't be shy!
We're simple people.
- Where is her mother?
- She changes.
Ah, I'm afraid of you!
Don't come close to me!
Why such disfavor, may I ask?
- Girls must never trust men.
- But I can restrain myself.
Everybody says so but it happens
in the opposite way.
I do not blame men.
They get everything easy.
But girls must fear their inclination
for falling in love.
What do you like more: winter
or summer?
- Summer. You can stroll in summer.
- You can sleigh in winter.
What berries do you like more?
- What about you?
- Strawberries with cream.
- I like gooseberries.
- How can it be? They’re thorny!
Why are we so submissive?
Men can do anything with us.
How can I dare without your favor?
What do you think, who is
better: man or woman?
Chicken is not a bird,
woman is not a human.
Mama, don't bring shame on you!
They say, you know,
there are such strong horses
that will never overstrain
themselves. My dear sir...
How was everything
between the two of you?
It is so adorable when my friends
indulge in confidences with me!
One minute - and I'm lost forever!
- Do you read newspapers?
- I do.
Have you read anything about
Napoleon?
- Is he marching at Moscow again?
- Not at all.
He is settling down at a new place.
Decorating rooms in his palace.
Thank God! This way, please.
Well, they say that Tsar Pharaoh
is coming out of the sea
with his troops at night!
He comes out and goes away again!
- Isn’t it before the end of time?
- It's very possible.
How to live in this world?
How horrible!
Hard times are coming!
They say a certain White Arab
is rising against us.
He leads 200 million troops!
- Off you go, I'll call you later.
- Where is that White Arab from?
- From White Arabia.
- Papers don’t tell much about it.
Such times!
Isn’t your suit too tight for you?
According to the fashion.
He is always dressed
according to the fashion.
My mama.
Did you hear - there is some
comet or planet descending on us.
Scientists looked at the sky
through a metroscope
and calculated with accuracy,
to the last digit,
on what day and at what hour
it will land on the Earth.
Oh God! Is it possible to evade
any God's planet
when every man has his own destiny?
- What are you talking about?
- What should we talk about?
- Don't bring shame on you.
- Do you read poetry?
I read mostly sentimental poems
which express love
and all kind of anguish.
You know there is so much poetry now
that expresses nothing.
So, I’m not interested in that.
Recite something to us, we will listen.
I’ve got a notebook for poetry
at home,
I put my verses down in it.
If you wish, I shall bring it.
Only now it’s impossible
to find good poetry.
Angry shepherd
Smelt… like peppered.
Yushka!
Bring me a stone to crack nuts!
Brother!
Here are our new acquaintances!
Hello, dear sir.
Would you like some tea?
Melanya! Tea!
- Do you serve?
- I do, sir.
Good, sir. To each his own, sir.
A trader trades, a serviceman serves,
an idler idles about.
I want to talk to you about our
trading business.
In our trading business…
- money is an important thing.
- Everyone likes to have money.
Who likes it, he should make it.
It is hard to make money nowadays.
Especially if a man is with good
taste, so he has to suffer -
he wants to live exquisitely, but,
alas... Take, for example, me…
A man who can’t get anything
shouldn’t live at all, nothing to say
about living in wealth.
- What are they to do then?
- To do dirty work, to dig ground.
- What rank do you have, dear sir?
- The first, sir.
A long way to General for you!
- How much are you paid?
- 120 rubles.
So, in one pocket it’s getting dark,
in the other it’s dawning.
In Tartar it’s “yuck”,
in Russian it’s “naught”.
Some tea, brother?
Dear sir!
Well, dear sir,
my sister is a damned fool.
- Gee, brother…
- What’s up with your gee?
- I’m not a horse to gee me up!
- Brother!
Most of all I'm afraid
that she'll find a match
as stupid as she is herself.
Oh God! They have such a fortune
no son-in-law will spend for ages!
They can make a poor man happy.
The money was made by her husband
not for her wasting and spending it.
- Money makes business go around!
- Yes.
Let her marry off her daughter,
- but I’m sorry for the money.
- I’m sorry, too!
Some young men are worth
2 kopecks in banknotes,
but he’ll dupe some silly girl
and would then show off:
Give me, he says, this much money!
Give me the best dowry!
After such words we've got nothing
to do here!
Mama!
I do not take these words personally.
Please, do take them personally.
Your mama is smarter.
She got my train of thought.
I am not after big money.
I’d be happy to have anything.
If you have not a kopeck,
any ruble is a fortune for you!
- So, good-bye! I didn’t expect it.
- Farewell.
- Thank you for your hospitality.
- You are welcome.
Come again! Life is dull
without fools!
Uncle, I’ll die just now!
Feign you have swooned.
- What is it?
- Nothing!
It will pass.
Didn't I tell you, yours was
a dream on the eve of the feast.
Had I seen it on a weekday,
that would be quite another thing.
Well, mama, if only I were a general…
These dreams are like a smoke.
You have again interrupted me. Why?
And at the most interesting moment…
In you go, shameless man! In you go!
Garrison detachment, fall in!
Recover bunches!
Have you gone mad or what?
Matryona!
Hello, good lady!
Don’t order to behead me,
but order to speak up!
You know there are people
that never have any shame.
Go!
We are little people, but have
clear conscience.
My conscience is
purer than gold or crystal!
You fell into such discomfiture,
it can't be helped.
But I will make up for it.
I expect nothing
but mockery from you.
If I feel guilty, I’ll do everything
to amend. My soul is of that kind.
Although it’s hard to live with
such virtue these days.
I don’t trust you. We’re poor people,
what interest you have in us?
I'll tell you what... Whoa!
A smart suitor will find a girl
without any matchmaker,
but your son is nothing without me,
so I’ll charge a good fee.
Everyone acts in his own interest.
What a dish I have in view now!
She is a rich widow, and is very
bored because of it.
She feels kind of a burden,
it’s like an illness.
She called in a doctor, of course.
And the doctor said that she needs
no medicine,
but only some amusement
and to get married.
- And so?
- She gave him three rubles.
I am about her marriage.
She said she was not against it,
but it’s hard to find a man,
being a home-sitter.
But what I am for? And she
asked me to take up her case.
What about her fortune?
Beyond any limits!
Matryona! Cabby, turn about!
Get in!
Misha!
Misha, my handsome one,
are you well?
We are. With our bulls and cows
returning you graceful bows.
Enough!
I found a girl for you!
Well, no need.
The end will be the same!
I have found one myself.
- Where?
- I won’t tell you!
- Nothing will come out it!
- We'll live and see!
Consider this: what kind of girl
you might need?
Me? An ordinary one.
No, not ordinary.
Listen to me. You are stupid...
- Oh, yes! Tell me another!
- Trust my words!
I'm a woman of experience.
I won’t cheat you.
Why are you so glad to argue about
everything, Mikhail Dmitrich?
Why shouldn't I argue
if she's calling me a fool!
She knows better.
So what she says is true!
What do you want from me?
- Be quiet!
- I am quiet.
You're stupid. You needn’t a girl
that is smarter than you, right?
- Of course!
- So we look for a sillier one.
Why are you pestering me?
You came to make fun of me!
- Just you wait!
- And what will you do?
I know what to do!
I’ll bring you to court!
Me - to court?
Are you in your right mind?
- You think I'm scared? Oh my!
- Akulina!
Good people!
Get up! Let’s go to law!
- What court you’ll bring me to?
- It’s my business!
We’ll have a special court and
you’ll have a verdict in no time!
I don't care!
What vices of mine are you going
to prove?
You are...
You’ll never find the words!
And I will say this and that…
They will write me a privilege
on paper!
What privilege?
Against you!
That I be better than you,
and higher in all things!
- Madam!
- I’ll never come here till my death!
Because, my friend, it is
not bread following the belly.
Let's go!
Hanging would be too good for you!
Go to hell you all.
I have tracked him down,
where he goes to.
- And?
- Not far from here.
He doesn’t go straight,
but in a roundabout way
so that the neighbors
couldn’t guess.
If only it turned out well!
I think he will not succeed
there, either.
- Why do you think so?
- Not a fine figure of a man.
Nothing to be tempted with.
A clerk of low rank.
- Who are they?
- The Pezhenovs.
What are they?
- Their own masters.
- How so?
- Well, in their own right.
- Stupid you are!
Are they civil servants
or merchants?
- In trade, I think.
- And what about girls?
Two sisters, both single.
They are cooped up there,
like under lock and key.
- Why so?
- The brothers ordered.
- What for?
- Very shameless towards men.
It’s terrible what a weakness
they have for men!
Balzaminov! What’s up with you?
I am waiting for you!
- Go round, I'll be right out.
- I’m, Lukyan Lukyanich...
- Sorry, Lukyan Lukyanich.
- Not good, I'm...
Wait, wait!
What is that? Asinchuk’s, eh?
So handsome! All right, you go.
Why do you look uneasy, eh?
Enough! Tell me whether you’ll do
what you promised, eh?
- Certainly.
- That's right. What?
Wait-wait! Get’im! Get’im!
So, as agreed?
Well, what I have promised…
Tell me another! I know people
of your sort.
So now, Balzaminov,
- you change into a shoemaker.
- Why?
You must look like a shoemaker.
He gave his consent.
How can you get in otherwise?
And now…
you ring at the gate…
they open it…
and you say that you came to young
ladies to take measurements.
It’s all agreed. And they lead you
to them right away.
What then?
- Are you in love or not?
- In love.
Then you must open your heart,
and hand in a letter.
You must give this letter to my girl
and declare your love to yours.
Tell her you’ll drive her away,
but you don’t confuse
my elder one with your younger one.
My Anfisa with your Raisa.
For mercy's sake, how can I?
Have you, Lukyan Lukyanich,
opened your heart already?
Me? Long ago!
And when will we drive them away, sir?
As soon as they agree.
But we must not be mistaken about...
About money?
No, I never make
mistakes in such matters.
- That’s you, but me…
- The sisters have it in equal parts.
The brothers don’t marry
them off because of the money.
Look! A real cobbler!
- I'm a shoemaker.
- Look, very much the same!
Very much, yes. Some shoemaker!
Wait-wait!
Look, Balzaminov, I even envy you.
What a handsome steed! Stop, I say!
Well, make him rear up!
I even envy you, Balzaminov!
You will be talking
with your beloved girl,
and I'll have to suffer alone.
Take the letter.
Come on! Come on!
Stop! Stop!
Listen, Balzaminov,
but what if your chief will know
that you make shoes?
It’s not good. My colleagues
will wonder, too.
And what if you will be flogged, eh?
Flogged!
What is this?
Lukyan Lukyanich, I won’t go.
You yourself send me there
and say that I’ll be flogged!
I meant it as a joke.
Don’t you like jokes, eh?
Don’t confuse my Anfisa
with your Raisa.
- I do not care much.
- Off you go!
What a nincompoop! A perfect fool.
He fancies that
they will fall in love with him.
However, if you look at life
philosophically,
such people are very helpful.
Whom else can you make change
into a shoemaker?
I can have 1.500 rubles,
if it turns out well.
Let me go, please…
Listen… let me go.
- What a bore, Anfisa!
- What a bore, Raisa!
- Oh Lord, how dull it is here!
- It makes me feel like howling.
You must get married Anfisa as soon
as possible and be free.
To get married to whom?
I'd rather die than be married
to those boors our brothers bring.
I am sick of ignorance at home.
- We are to blame ourselves, too.
- How come?
When our dad had died...
we kind of let our hair down.
That was a golden time!
Memorable moments.
Khimka! Play “Galop”!
Khimka! Come on!
Anfiska, Raiska, stop your gallop!
Let's go in to sleep on.
I thought much and have thought of
- eloping with Lukyan Lukyanich.
- What? How can you!
What of it? I'll just
go out, and farewell.
Do I feel sorry for anybody here?
While we live here, the brothers
have power over us,
but as soon as we are out,
it's all over.
And then I shall demand
the money I inherited.
- It seems scary to be abducted.
- Not a bit, Raisa.
- I had already been taken away.
- I remember
- as you came back before long.
- Snake!
Let bygones be bygones.
He has come!
The shoemaker has come.
What shoe…
What shoe…
What shoemaker?
I don’t know.
He says he was sent by his friend
to take measurements.
- Where are the brothers?
- They went in to sleep.
- Go open the gate!
- They will scold you.
Do it!
But how brave you are!
Love overcomes everything.
Khimka, go and stand on watch!
If somebody is awake, let us know.
Have you seen Lukyan Lukyanich?
I have a letter from him.
Give it to me.
I have got everything ready.
You have seen many
proofs of my love.
For your sake I abandoned
the society and all my connections.
I forgot all the pleasures of life
and am living for more than a year
in this wild land
where only bears
and Balzaminovs can live.
If you want us both to be happy,
tonight, when it gets dark
and your folks go to bed,
you go out into the garden.
In the side street
at the back of your garden,
I will be waiting for you
in a carriage.
Your garden fence is bad
at one place.
We will tear some planks off
and you will be free.
We will drive fifteen miles
to a place
where my friends are waiting
and everything is ready,
even music.
Oh, Raisa, what a noble man he is!
He steals me away, and all is ready,
even music.
Well, who but a gentleman can
behave like that?
- Will you go, Anfisa?
- Of course I will!
It would be impolite not to.
But you might still enjoy
your life here.
In that case, I feel sorry
for my proposal to elope with me…
Why does he think so low about us?
If you will not venture to flee tonight,
then tomorrow…
...tomorrow I will leave
to the Caucasus.
I am so grateful to you, Mister
Balzaminov.
Please wait for my answer.
Sorry to have kept you waiting.
Not at all! It’s very nice!
- Where did she go?
- To write an answer.
Will it be soon?
We do nothing too soon,
it’s not our habit.
And besides letters,
we write nothing.
Off you go!
I feel miserable nowadays…
- So do us!
- You, maybe, not because of…
Because we are locked up and
have no entertainment!
- I have another reason…
- What is your reason?
Of a night, I cannot even
- sleep!
- Maybe you sleep in the daytime?
No. Not because of that,
but because of my sentiments…
I feel as if… I am...
the most miserable man in the world.
You don't say so! A man is always
happier than a woman.
The woman is unhappy because
she is always in somebody’s power.
But men’s unhappiness
results from love.
And who is the lady who happened
to fascinate you?
Maybe it’ll be unpleasant
for you to hear it?
Not in the least,
quite on the contrary!
In that case, I should say that
you are that lady!
Well, I never! I did not expect this!
No words to express my love!
I would like to express it, but…
I can’t.
- And when did you fall in love?
- On Thursday last week.
- Quite recently!
- I can love longer!
Maybe you are a frivolous person?
I consider this as meanness in men.
Well, if so, would you agree to elope
with me?
Lukyan Lukyanich wants
to take away your sister,
so I could do it together with him.
Goodbye, Mr. Balzaminov!
Here is the letter!
Brothers… woke up!
Hurry!
- Get off!
- Get off!
Sit and help yourself!
Away!
How soon will you find a suitor
for me?
Very soon, my beauty.
Find a good one!
Even if he were undersea
I’ll get him from the bottom
of the sea for your pleasure.
But you, too, be kind
to repay my errands.
I’ll do. I am kind.
She is kind. She is kind.
What Moscow is talking about?
People talk much, but you
can’t believe everything.
Isn’t there a new war declared?
Peace has been made everywhere.
Though it’s rumored the earth
is shaking in some places.
Not good!
Well, for your precaution,
they say that
- a gang of robbers showed up.
- Where from?
From deep forests, it is said.
They have iron claws on hands
and they walk on stilts.
Their chief is dressed like a Turk.
Why on stilts?
For speed and for horror.
A cock-and-bull story, maybe?
It’s true, you can trust me.
Well, look at the fence.
On their stilts they can jump
over even that high fence!
Akulina Gavrilovna!
Holy saints! You scared me to death!
My heart even gave a jump!
Devil take you!
- Where am I?
- How did you get here?
- Help me out of here!
- Barbarian, what you have done!
With our ample forms, we must be
careful not to die of fright!
What if we’ll tie you up and take
to police?
- Why?
- Do not jump over fences!
Look, how you frightened
my mistress!
I wonder whether she is alive
or not out there!
- What an unlucky man I am!
- Don’t try to evoke pity!
She is widow for five years!
And she wants to get married now.
She has all her rights to sue you
for disgrace,
and you’ll be tried and sent
to the land of no return!
Do not frighten me!
I’ll give you all you want.
- Two thousand rubles!
- Where can I get it?
You’ll have it. But you should
listen to me and do as I tell you!
Now come to the mistress
and say that you are in love.
She’s a widow and is rich
beyond limits. Got it?
- I’ll shower you with gifts!
- Tomorrow we’ll sign a deal.
You only say: “I am in love!” and
kiss the hand.
Not mine! Go wash yourself
and come to her!
Never mind! It’s a friend
of the mistress got by mistake.
Domna Evstigneevna!
Do not be afraid!
It’s a friend got by mistake.
- Why did you...?
- In love.
- And why over the fence?
- Moved by sentiments.
You are not angry with me?
I am never angry. I am kind.
- What are you doing?
- Me? Nothing.
So am I.
It’s so boring to do nothing all alone.
- It’s happier if together.
- Much more!
Do you want it together?
I would be all happy!
May I kiss your hand, please?
Very well...
Come close.
I will so…
You love me, so I will love you, too!
Much obliged, ma'am!
Oh, how cold…
how cold is the water in your pool!
The samovar is still warm, isn’t it?
I like him.
- You make him…
- I’d rather go home.
Make him come to me every day!
All is in our hands.
She’s a little too plump, eh?
Now you start talking? Off you go!
What? Through the gate! Don’t be
afraid, no one will touch you!
Kiss the hand.
O Lord!
I feel much happier now!
Mother of God and Virgin, rejoice!
Pass, pass…
Boy!
Matryona!
Matryona!
Do we have a fortune teller,
a cheap one, living not far?
What do you want to ask her about?
About life, happiness, all this.
There is one, dealing with
lost things.
But she never mentions
a thief's name.
They’d ask: “Who has stolen this?”
And she’d kind of conjure
and says
to blame a black-haired man
or a pocked one.
Though she’s telling lies mostly
in her old age.
- I don’t need this kind.
- There's no other around!
What a place we live in!
You can never find anything
you really need!
- And who reads the cards around?
- I don’t know.
What an inattentive woman you are!
You have no curiosity
about the world.
I don’t want to get my fortune told.
I do not expect any heaps of gold.
So I can live without
any fortune telling.
Well, mama, it's done.
I saw the girl
and the woman the matchmaker
proposed, too.
- I'll marry her!
- Whom?
Both.
What? Are you a Tartar or what?
Come to your senses!
Mama!
I’ll hire a butler and fire Matryona
for rudeness!
This girl, how much does she have?
- A hundred and fifty thousand!
- And she agreed to marry you!
Both agreed. But the first one
wants to be taken away
and the second one, well… at home.
You know what came to my mind,
mama?
If they give away that garden
for the Pezhenov girl
it would be possible
to pull down the fence,
for their gardens are neighboring,
and make a single park
with various pavilions and alleys...
Do you really want to marry
both of them?
You are interrupting me again!
I could have dreamed at last!
Never mind, dream on!
Some might not even speak with
his mother
on getting such a wealth!
But I talk with you of whatever
you want.
No matter that I am rich.
I treat you with reverence.
And which of them is more beautiful?
For me, mama, all rich women
are beauties. I can see no difference
somehow.
No light!
In the dark I can dream better.
Now I can fancy myself as I like -
now in a big
and beautiful chamber,
now in a carriage, in a garden…
But if you bring a candle, I will see
this poor room and all is lost.
Dream on!
No, I can feel that things
get confused in my head;
it’s even getting weird!
It’s because I’m not used to think
as a richman.
I always had thoughts of a poor man,
and now all this richness
doesn’t fit into my head.
Mama, what if I would build
a tower so high
that we can see all Moscow at once!
I can keep pigeons in the tower.
- What?
- Oh, my dear.
Sorry, ma’am.
- I am here, Lukyan Lukyanich!
- It's time!
- Misha, where are you to?
- To the Pezhenovs.
I delivered a letter in which it was
said we will take them away tonight.
- You’ve made up your mind?
- No.
Because if I marry one of them,
I’ll have to lose the other, right?
- Why are you going then?
- What will be, will be!
I should try my fortune in any way!
- What shall I do, sir?
- I'll teach you!
And where are the ladies usually
brought when taken away?
Anywhere!
- And where’s my carriage?
- You'll learn later.
Gee up!
Respectable people, who wish
themselves well,
go to the madhouse to see Ivan
because of every trifle!
They take counsel! And we are
marring off without any advice!
They say that even a stick
can shoot once!
And you’ll come to live with us!
We’ll have a good time together!
- I'll pick up a serviceman, too!
- And what about this blond?
- You must be mad!
- Why are you flirting with him then?
Out of boredom!
Farewell, Balzaminov!
I’ll add you to my list of names
remembered before God!
- When are we going to elope?
- Go away from me!
I‘m bored with you to death!
Help! Help!
It’s all because you never
seek advice.
Why couldn’t you think of where
you take her to and in what?
I was counting upon
Lukyan Lukyanich!
That's all he needs to get into now!
Every tub must stand
on its own bottom!
If truth be told, mama,
I was as if in a daze.
It seemed the carriage would come
out of the blue,
- and I would bring her to us!
- To this apartment?
You wouldn’t believe it,
but when I was thinking
of taking her away, I fancied
we had our own stone house!
It’s a pity that things are
like that, all wrong,
when the rich marry the rich
and the poor marry the poor.
Is there any justice?
If I were the Tsar...
The Tsar's decree!
The rich marry the poor
and the poor marry the rich!
And the one who disobeys
must be beheaded!
Matroyna, can you read dreams?
Why should I? Anything
can happen in a dream.
There can be any changes
in people's lives!
One comes out
of poverty into wealth,
yet others -
out of wealth into poverty.
I have not yet seen such changes.
Richmen live in wealth as before.
and the poor, despite
any changes, are still poor.
Such a strange dream!
It’s a kind of festivities
with people strolling…
- It means snow.
- In August?
- Then it is rain.
- No, not rain.
- Then I don’t know what.
- If so, shut your mouth.
- I shut it.
- And keep it shut.
- And then I see as it sails away…
- What?
- A ship.
- Money would melt away!
- But at first I see a bridge…
- Bridge reads as moving!
Don’t interrupt me! And beyond
the bridge there is China!
I don’t know what it means.
But China is neither land,
nor a town.
It looks like a nice house! But
it has a signboard “China”.
And there come out of the house
not Chinese men or women,
but Misha, and he says:
“Mama, come here, into China”.
And I am kind of going to come,
but people start crying:
“Don’t go! He’s lying!”
China, they say, is not there.
It is on our side.
I turn round and see that China
is really on our side!
Just the same!
And Misha is so cheerful.
He is dancing and singing:
“I’ll go to China to have fun!”
What does it mean?
Even if my life were at stake
I couldn’t tell you what it meant.
That woman the matchmaker proposed
has a shop in Kitay-gorod which
sounds like China town, that’s all.
- Mama!
- What?
Tell me, in which month I was born?
- In May!
- So I may fool about all my life.
Soon the matchmaker will come
and bring such news
you can be off your head with!
I never take chasers.
I have no such stupid habit.
Because I'm a educated woman,
very educated.
I was well educated by my late
husband.
Ask me what I hadn’t been
beaten with?
With a poker,
with a stovelength…
thrown against the stove, but, no,
not beaten with the stove.
Mikhail Dmitrich!
Mikhail Dmitrich!
I have come from far away.
I went by towns and villages,
by deep forests,
by thick bushes,
by steep river banks!
My throat is dry,
my tongue is tired!
And there shot the prince
a white swan with his arrow!
I have the honor to report, that
you may get married any day!
Stop! Stop!
Just a moment!
Mama!
You watch now lest I do
something with myself!
What is it, mama?
Am I not a Balzaminov any more,
but another man?
And you said that I was a fool.
I won’t go back on my words!
Misha, don’t take offence,
you needn’t be smart!
Let you live happily!
Having money, we can live
very well as it is!
Mama, previously I felt hurt
that I was neither rich, nor smart!
And now let them speak
that I am a fool!
Let them speak! I am a fool!
A fool!
Flowerets at my garden,
Please, I beg…
Translated by Alexander Kormashov