When Zachary Beaver Came to Town (2003) - full transcript

Zachary Beaver, a sideshow attraction known as the world's fattest boy, arrives in the sleepy town of Granger, Texas.

-Do you know what
would be cool?

-Do you know what
would be cool?

-What?

-Climb all the way to the top

and cross the catwalk.

and cross the catwalk.

-I could do it.

-Then do it.

-Then do it.

I dare ya.

(exhales)



(sighs)

(yelling) Ahh!

Get Wayne!

(sighs) I'm gonna die.

My mom's gonna
kill me if I die.

My mom's gonna
kill me if I die.

-You're not gonna die.

I'll get ya down.

-How?

-How?

-What were you doing, climbin'
up here?

-Cal dared me.

-Cal dared me.

-I did not!



I told him he was too little.

-I'm not too little!

-I'm not too little!

Catwalk broke.

-You do whatever my little
brother says?

Here, just grab on.

Here, just grab on.

(gasps)

-There you go.

-There you go.

(straining) There... okay.

All right.

All right.

(yelling) Ahh!

-I got ya. There we go.

-I got ya. There we go.

(shouting from below)
All right, Wayne!

(grunts)

(grunts)

You gotta be smarter now
that I'm leavin'.

You gotta be smarter now
that I'm leavin'.

(sighs) When are
ya comin' back?

(sighs) When are
ya comin' back?

-They don't tell ya.
(chuckles)

Come on, I'll buy
ya a snow cone.

Come on, I'll buy
ya a snow cone.

TOBY: Even though Wayne is
technically Cal's brother,

TOBY: Even though Wayne is
technically Cal's brother,

he's totally like a big
brother to me.

So starting here on the
silo makes sense.

So starting here on the
silo makes sense.

See, that day was not only

the first time he was leaving,

but also the last time
anything in my life

but also the last time
anything in my life

was ever normal.

-Stay close.

-Up till then, every
day was fun,

-Up till then, every
day was fun,

and trouble was never
anything Wayne

and a snow cone couldn't fix.

and a snow cone couldn't fix.

-But Wayne had to go
join the army,

-But Wayne had to go
join the army,

and as the summer went on,

I realized that was only the
beginning.

-Mom, where did you
get those pants?

-I ordered them online.

-I ordered them online.

They look killer, don't they?

-They look uncomfortable.

-They look uncomfortable.

-Comfort and lookin' good
aren't exactly

two peas in a pod, honey.

two peas in a pod, honey.

(exhales) But I feel good...

which is why I'm gonna win the

"Hearts of Country
Music Television."

"Hearts of Country
Music Television."

-Mom actually
works as a waitress,

but her dream is to
be a singer.

but her dream is to
be a singer.

...like a Dixie Chick,
or Shania Twain.

-What is it now?

-Don't worry,
I've about got it.

-Don't worry,
I've about got it.

-I can not miss my flight.

-I got it, honey.

-My dad works as a mailman,
but he really likes worms.

-My dad works as a mailman,
but he really likes worms.

I'm serious-- he raises worms
for fertilizer and fish bait.

I'm serious-- he raises worms
for fertilizer and fish bait.

-I got somethin' for you.

-Oh, no.

-Oh, no.

-It's to keep your throat
warm before you sing.

-It's to keep your throat
warm before you sing.

-So, anyway, 12 years ago
they got together and made me.

-So, anyway, 12 years ago
they got together and made me.

-Thanks. Be careful
with it.

I don't need engine
grease on my neck.

Toby, come and hug me.

(chuckling) Ohh...
goodbye, baby.

(chuckling) Ohh...
goodbye, baby.

(KISSES HIS HEAD)

(KISSES HIS HEAD)

You and your dad
and these glasses.

You'll look better
in contacts.

You'll look better
in contacts.

-You think so?

-I know so.

-I know so.

-Be back by four. Give that
worm a squirt, okay?

-Be back by four. Give that
worm a squirt, okay?

-I love you.

-I love you, too.
Don't be scared.

-I love you, too.
Don't be scared.

I knew I'd miss my mom.

But I'd no idea of the trouble
headed my way...

But I'd no idea of the trouble
headed my way...

... and no idea,
that rolling into town,

... and no idea,
that rolling into town,

was the last person I'd
ever expect to change my life.

(shouts, indistinct)

(shouts, indistinct)

-Toby!

-Toby!

Toby!

-I'm in the worm shed.

-Didn't you hear?

-Didn't you hear?

-Hear what?

-Come on, quick.

Wo-Honey, honey, look.

Wo-Honey, honey, look.

-Come on!

-Come on!

-Wait up!

-Look.

♪ (carnival music plays) ♪

-You're not going
in there, are you?

-Hi, Kate.

-Of course, we are.

What are you going to do,
stand there

What are you going to do,
stand there

and take stupid pictures?

-Has your mom left for
Nashville yet?

-She's on her way.

-She's on her way.

-If she wins, she's gonna get
to make a record, right?

-Yeah, that's what they say.

-Nice talkin' to you
guys, too. (grunts)

-Ooh, Scarlet.

Toby, dude, she wants you.

(indistinct)

(indistinct)

-Hey, Toby. Would y'all
do me a favor?

-Hey, Toby. Would y'all
do me a favor?

-Sure.

-Take Tara in for me.
I gotta get home.

-Take Tara in for me.
I gotta get home.

Mom's out so Juan's
droppin' by.

Mom's out so Juan's
droppin' by.

-It's show time, folks.
Welcome, fellow Texans.

-It's show time, folks.
Welcome, fellow Texans.

-It's show time, folks.
Welcome, fellow Texans.

Your lovely town may be
too remote for

the circus to visit,
but not for us.

the circus to visit,
but not for us.

My name is Paulie Rankin,
known in the business

as The Wizard.

as The Wizard.

It's time now to
enter the domain

of Zachary Beaver, possible
the fattest boy in the world.

of Zachary Beaver, possible
the fattest boy in the world.

Four-hundred and
forty-three pounds.

Now, you don't have to rush,
but no dawdling, please.

Now, you don't have to rush,
but no dawdling, please.

In the tradition, I'll be
happy to take your questions.

-And your money.

-And your money.

Oh, by the way, could you lend
me the five bucks?

-Add it to your tab.

-Add it to your tab.

(sarcastic)
Ha, ha, ha.

-Is that another letter
from Wayne?

-Oh, yeah. Here.

-Oh, yeah. Here.

-Let's see.

-Its so weird-- he can't email
when he's on a mission.

Ever write him back yet?

Ever write him back yet?

-No, not yet.

-Man, do you think
Intelligence checked this

to see what he wrote?

to see what he wrote?

-Intelligence?
It doesn't matter.

I mean, he sails halfway
around the world

I mean, he sails halfway
around the world

and then he writes back about

'excitement central' here

like it's the greatest
place on earth.

like it's the greatest
place on earth.

-Whew! Makes you think,
don't it?

-It certainly does.
It certainly does.

-Here, and her.

-Here, and her.

-Mm-hey--

Sh-- She doesn't gotta go to the
bathroom, does she?

-Do you?

-Do you?

-Okay.

-She better not, or else.

-She better not, or else.

(gasps)

-How much do you eat?

-How much do you eat?

-As much as I can.

-How old are you?

-How old are you?

-Old enough.

-Where do you go to school?

-You're looking at it.

-You're looking at it.

-What's in this gold box?

-What's in this gold box?

-Do I smell pee?

-Do I smell pee?

-Gee!

(angrily) Did that kid
just pee in here?

(shouting, angrily)
Get her out of here.

(shouting, angrily)
Get her out of here.

-Here, home. Go change.

-Here, home. Go change.

-He was so fat!

-Hey, man, I didn't
know you babysat.

-Hey, man, I didn't
know you babysat.

(Scarlet laughs)

-Oh, my God.

-Oh, my God.

-Come on, your mom
never lets me cook.

I'm goin' all out while I can.

I'm goin' all out while I can.

Where's the-- Oh.

This came for you.

This came for you.

-What's this?

-I think it's the...

-I think it's the...

contact lenses your mother
ordered for you.

Hungry? It's Manwich flambe.

Hungry? It's Manwich flambe.

(belches)

(belches)

-One more.
-Give it a rest.

-One more, come on.

-One more, come on.

-No.
-Stupid loser.

-Just come out here and have a
smoke, for Christ's sake.

Can I just come out here--

Can I just come out here--

-One more.
-No more.

Forget it.
No more Boggle.

-Well, what else do
you wanna play?

-Well, what else do
you wanna play?

Paulie, come on.

Hey, Paulie! Come back!
Come on!

Hey, Paulie! Come back!
Come on!

Paulie.

(indistinctx conversation)

-You won't be able to
get your license

if you can't learn to park.

if you can't learn to park.

-Oh, be quiet!

-AH! OH!
She hit me.

-AH! OH!
She hit me.

I'm hit.

I'm hit.

-Cal. Cal.

-Cal. Cal.

You boys come here a minute?

-You know, ladybugs are
comin' in a few days

and we're gonna need some
help,

with Wayne gone-- from both of
you. All right?

with Wayne gone-- from both of
you. All right?

-Sure, mom.

-We need 'em for the cotton
crop.

-We need 'em for the cotton
crop.

They're nature's pesticide.

(tires squeak)

-Kate!

-Kate!

-Why don't you boys give
her some space?

Go away... now.

Go away... now.

-What do you want to do?

-I don't know. What
do you want to do?

-I don't know. What
do you want to do?

-I don't know.
There's nothing to do.

-You think
he's still there?

I mean, you know, the fat kid?

I mean, you know, the fat kid?

(sighs) Na, it's too hot.
He'd melt.

(sighs) Na, it's too hot.
He'd melt.

-You really think he
weighs four hundred

and forty-three pounds?

-I don't know. That's
what they said.

-How do you think
they weigh him?

-How do you think
they weigh him?

Most scales don't
even go that high.

(snickers) Maybe at
the meat market.

(snickers) Maybe at
the meat market.

-Ohh, how do you think
he goes to the bathroom?

-Nasty!

-You're such a little girl.
(chuckles)

-You're such a little girl.
(chuckles)

-Well, you are.

-I'm hungry. Come on,
let's go eat.

-I'm hungry. Come on,
let's go eat.

-Think it's safe
to go in here

without your mom working?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-Hi, Ferris.

-Hi, Ferris.

-Is your mom back yet?

-She just left yesterday.

-Oh. Tell her to
hurry back.

-Oh. Tell her to
hurry back.

She's the people-person
around here, you know?

-Why'd they leave the trailer?

-They'll be back soon enough.

-Well, how'd that fat kid fit
in that old convertible?

-Well, how'd that fat kid fit
in that old convertible?

-And don't think I'm givin'
you any free meals

like your mom does.

like your mom does.

Is that why you're here?

-Guess not.

(under his breath)
Waited this long.

-Morning, Ferris, boys.

-Morning, Ferris, boys.

-Levi, Miss Earline.

-Ferris, about that business
across the street-

-Ferris, about that business
across the street-

I thought they'd have
pulled out by now.

-It's bad enough, what
happened yesterday,

-It's bad enough, what
happened yesterday,

but what in the world
is that trashy,

tin can still doin' here?

-It is my lot, ma'am.

-It is my lot, ma'am.

-Well, they've been gone since
early this mornin'.

You got any idea
where they went?

You got any idea
where they went?

-He gave me money
to feed the boy.

-He gave me money
to feed the boy.

-You mean, that boy
is still out there?

-He said he'd just
be overnight.

-He said he'd just
be overnight.

-Sheriff, it's illegal
to abandon a child

in the state of Texas.

in the state of Texas.

And immoral, anywhere
on God's good earth.

-Okay, what would you
like me to do?

-Okay, what would you
like me to do?

-Well, there's an
abandoned child.

So call the Social Services
on him, or I will.

So call the Social Services
on him, or I will.

-So, why--

He must be on the
toilet or somethin'.

-Stop bein' a baby.

-Stop bein' a baby.

-Unbelievable.

Man, you gotta see this.
Look at this.

Man, you gotta see this.
Look at this.

Look-- Have you ever seen a
cereal box that big?

Look-- Have you ever seen a
cereal box that big?

-What are you perverts
lookin' at?

You get out of here!
I'm callin' the cops!

You get out of here!
I'm callin' the cops!

-This guy's a lot bigger
than that fake in the trailer.

-Give him time.

-Give him time.

-No way. The man said
he only weighed

four hundred and
forty-three pounds, right?

-Well, I doubt if
that's even true.

-Well, I doubt if
that's even true.

Man, I want a refund.

-Hi, guys.

Heard from mom today?

Heard from mom today?

-Nah.

(sighs) Cal, why don't you
join us for dinner?

(sighs) Cal, why don't you
join us for dinner?

-Oh, su-- Oh, no, um.

You know, I don't think I can.

You know, I don't think I can.

-Well, sure you can.
I'll call your folks.

-Dear Cal, hope
summer vacation is

-Dear Cal, hope
summer vacation is

treatin' you right.

We've been on some
pretty crazy missions

over here, so I haven't

over here, so I haven't

had much decent to eat lately.

Tomorrow I start R&R for two
days and I'm gonna eat

the biggest meal I
can find, twice.

the biggest meal I
can find, twice.

After that, more top-secret
work I can't write about.

After that, more top-secret
work I can't write about.

You know how we'd all
play war in the back yard

with paint balls
and water guns?

with paint balls
and water guns?

-Well, it's a whole
other deal,

what we're doin' over here.
I've seen some scary stuff.

what we're doin' over here.
I've seen some scary stuff.

But I like to think
we're makin' a dent.

Plus, I am getting' paid.
Mom sent some organic

Plus, I am getting' paid.
Mom sent some organic

fiber cookies, but it's hot
here.

fiber cookies, but it's hot
here.

Every day it's snow-cone
hot, as Wiley puts it.

They're the best way
on earth to beat the heat.

They're the best way
on earth to beat the heat.

I want one, bad.

-Can I have the number
of Social Services, please?

-Can I have the number
of Social Services, please?

-I hope mom's finally
over me runnin' off

to the military.

to the military.

You know, if she gets on
your case about anything,

just tell her how pretty
her roses are lookin'

and
she'll calm down.

and
she'll calm down.

-Little brother, you gotta
write me sometime.

-Little brother, you gotta
write me sometime.

Email's iffy, but an actual
letter...

will get to me
eventually.

Fill me in on what's
up in town, what Billy is doin'

Fill me in on what's
up in town, what Billy is doin'

what, what girls you're
meeting,

Kate's latest oddity--
all of it.

Kate's latest oddity--
all of it.

Be good, Wayne.

Be good, Wayne.

P. S., tell your buddy
Toby I said 'hi'.

P. S., tell your buddy
Toby I said 'hi'.

(sighs) Maybe he's dead.

-Maybe you should knock again.

-Maybe you should knock again.

-I got a better idea.

-If he's asleep, this
will wake him up.

-If he's asleep, this
will wake him up.

(grunts)

(grunts)

-Ha, you suck.

-You could do better?
You try it.

-You could do better?
You try it.

Here.

-No, we'll get in trouble.

(grunts) Stop being a baby.
-I'm not a baby.

-Oh, you know a
better word for it?

-Oh, you know a
better word for it?

-You're the baby and you'll
always be because

you're the youngest in
your family

and younger than me.

-Oh, that doesn't mean any...

-Oh, that doesn't mean any...

-Three months.

-... thing. Uh-uh, no, that
doesn't mean

(overlapping, arguing)

(overlapping, arguing)

-Ah! We missed him!

-Fat boy, come out again.

-Oh, no, look.

-Oh, no, look.

(KNOCKING)

(GASPS)

-We've got to stop them.

-We've got to stop them.

-And fire!

(GRUNTING)

(laughing) Oh, I
think I just hit him!

(grunts)

(grunts)

(SMASHES WINDOW)
-Oh, my God!

We gotta get out of here!

We gotta get out of here!

-Oh, shoot! Go, go, go!

(sighs)

-Butthead, you notice you lost
something yesterday?

It's in my room.
I'll go get it.

It's in my room.
I'll go get it.

-Hey, I didn't lose anything.

(sighs)

(KNOCK AT THE DOOR)
-Hello?

(KNOCK AT THE DOOR)
-Hello?

Hello?

It's the sheriff.

It's the sheriff.

(spits & gags)

-Oh, man, the fat
freak told on us.

(whispering)
Quiet. Quiet.

(whispering)
Quiet. Quiet.

-Back door. Let's go.

-Come on. This way.

(dog grumbles)

-No.

-No.

(overlapping, whispering)
No, no.

(whispering) No, shh!
Quiet! No! Stop.

No, no, no, no.
Shh! Shh! Stop.

No, no, no, no.
Shh! Shh! Stop.

-Muchacho...

... what have we got here?

(dog barks)

(dog barks)

Well, here, you boys are.

(Speaks Spanish)

He minds better in Spanish.

What are you boys up to? Hmm?

What are you boys up to? Hmm?

Listen, I've got a
favor to ask y'all.

Listen, I've got a
favor to ask y'all.

Would you mind comin' with me

over to that
side-show trailer?

-Sure.

-Sure.

-I need to find out what those
fellow's plans are.

But I don't wanna scare
that-- that fat kid, you know?

But I don't wanna scare
that-- that fat kid, you know?

And since you boys are about
his age, maybe he'll relax,

And since you boys are about
his age, maybe he'll relax,

loosen up and tell me the
whereabouts of that other guy.

-It's a nice place
you got here.

(sighs)

-You have everything you need?

-You have everything you need?

-I'm fine, cowboy.

-Sheriff'll do.

-Sheriff'll do.

Looks like you
got a problem with your

window over there.
What happened?

window over there.
What happened?

-I guess some kids did it.

-Well, I'll drop by
later on and we'll

-Well, I'll drop by
later on and we'll

get somebody
to fix it.

Toby and Cal, here,
are about your age.

Toby and Cal, here,
are about your age.

How old are you boys?

-Twelve.
-Twelve.

-I'm fourteen.

-You don't sound like
you're from Texas.

-You don't sound like
you're from Texas.

-I'm from New York-- New
York City. Ever heard of it?

(chuckling) You're somewhat
of a comedian, too.

(chuckling) You're somewhat
of a comedian, too.

Here?

Here?

Ah... so you and Wizard are
from New York, is that right?

-"Wizard"? Nobody calls
Paulie that, except Paulie.

-"Wizard"? Nobody calls
Paulie that, except Paulie.

He's from Jersey.

He's from Jersey.

-Do you know where
Paulie is now?

-He's lookin' for a couple of
acts to add to our show.

-He's lookin' for a couple of
acts to add to our show.

-So, Paulie is your father?

-No way.

-No way.

Hey, put it down.
My mom gave that to me.

-Put it down.
-It's just a bible.

-Put it down.
-It's just a bible.

-It's not "just a bible."

My mom gave that to me
when I got baptized.

-Cal--

-Cal--

-Now, put it back.

-Cal, now put the boy's bible
down.

All right, so where
are your parents?

-Rosemont Cemetery.

-Rosemont Cemetery.

-Oh, well, I'm sorry
to hear that, son.

-I'm not your son.

-I'm not your son.

-Of course not... Who is your
legal guardian?

-Of course not... Who is your
legal guardian?

-Paulie Rankin's
my legal guardian.

-I see. Well, I hate to
break this to you, but,

Mr. Rankin should never
have left you here.

Mr. Rankin should never
have left you here.

-There's nothin'
to worry about.

-There's nothin'
to worry about.

Paulie'll be back by tomorrow.

-Well, he told Ferris he would
be back today.

-Well, he told Ferris he would
be back today.

-Really? I'm his business
partner, you know.

-I see.

-I see.

Well... you boys stay here and
get acquainted.

Mr. Beaver, I do hope
your partner comes back.

Mr. Beaver, I do hope
your partner comes back.

Mr. Beaver, I do hope
your partner comes back.

-What is this?

-What is this?

I'm the biggest crime problem
in the whole town?

-Ah- choo!

-Ah- choo!

Sure gets
dusty in here quick,

Sure gets
dusty in here quick,

with that window broken.

-Get the TV, too.

-You do tricks with
those or somethin'?

-You do tricks with
those or somethin'?

-Yeah, they're called
sleights.

It's all about the shuffle and
the patter.

It's all about the shuffle and
the patter.

Shuffle and the patter.

(chuckling)
Oh, hey, here, look.

There's the Wizard.

There's the Wizard.

-That's an old book.

Paulie and I are gonna be much
bigger than all of those acts.

Paulie and I are gonna be much
bigger than all of those acts.

We're adding more talent. We
got a big future in show biz.

-Right.

-Right.

-So what do you cowpokes do
around her for fun?

-We're not cowpokes.

-We're not cowpokes.

-Really? Isn't this Texas?

Where the buffalo
roam and the deer

Where the buffalo
roam and the deer

and the cantaloupe play?

-Right, there's tons of
cantaloupe

running around out here.

running around out here.

They're right outside
of WalMarts.

-I said antelope.

-No, you didn't.
-Yeah, I did.

-No, you didn't.
-Yeah, I did.

-Didn't.
-Did.

(CONTINUES OVERLAPPING)

-Hey, guys?

-Hey, guys?

-You said cantaloupe.

Don't mess with me, okay?

-We're not cowpokes.

-We're not cowpokes.

-Cantaloupe! Cantaloupe!
Cant--

(CONTINUES OVERLAPPING)

-Guys, come on.

-Did, did, di--

-Did, did, di--

(yelling)
Cal!

-It's time to go.

-I know you said cantaloupe.

-Hey, it's pretty cool he
didn't tell on us, huh?

-Yeah.

-Otto.

-I heard you boys were in the
back of the squad car.

Were you in some kind of
trouble?

-Not at all.

-Not at all.

-We were helpin'
the sheriff with

some official business, about
Zachary Beaver over there.

some official business, about
Zachary Beaver over there.

-Now, Otto, I wouldn't
want my son

mixed up with those people.

-These boys have
been a big help.

Find out anything new
I need to know?

Find out anything new
I need to know?

-And if your wife was here,

she'd probably just write a
song about it,

somethin' like, "The Battle
of Zachary Beaver."

somethin' like, "The Battle
of Zachary Beaver."

-Any word on that contest yet?

-No... not yet.

-No... not yet.

Toby, I need you to
come with me.

Sorry, Cal.

Sorry, Cal.

(exhales)

-She didn't win.

-She didn't win.

-But you just told everybody.

Um... was a long shot.

Um... was a long shot.

Guess we'll have her back
tomorrow, right, dad?

-She'll be stayin' on
for a while.

-She'll be stayin' on
for a while.

She got runner-up.

Apparently some...

Apparently some...

some manager thinks he could
get her a record deal.

some manager thinks he could
get her a record deal.

-How long will that take?

-Those kinds of things can
take a long time, son.

-Those kinds of things can
take a long time, son.

-How long?

-Sometimes they never happen.

-Sometimes they never happen.

-Mom won't leave us forever.

When is she coming back?

When is she coming back?

(sighs)

I can't answer that.

I can't answer that.

You're gonna have to call her
and ask her yourself.

(sighs)

(sighs)

(dialling phone)

(dialling phone)

(sighs)

(sighs)

-What ya doin'?

-What ya doin'?

-Nothing.

What are you doing?

-Nothing...

-Are you okay?

-Are you okay?

-I broke up with Juan.

-Oh. Sorry. That's tough, huh?

-Oh. Sorry. That's tough, huh?

-Mama doesn't like
Juan because

he's 15 and Guatemalan.

he's 15 and Guatemalan.

But I bet, if he was
20 and a Martian,

But I bet, if he was
20 and a Martian,

she'd like him fine, just
as long as he was rich.

she'd like him fine, just
as long as he was rich.

He won't stand up to her

and I don't want a boyfriend
that's scared of my mama.

and I don't want a boyfriend
that's scared of my mama.

-You don't want that.
You deserve better.

-You're right. I do!

-You're right. I do!

Thank you, Toby.
You are so smart.

(DISTANT MUSIC & CHATTER)

-Oh, listen.
I love this song.

-Oh, listen.
I love this song.

Let's dance!

-Dance?

-Dance?

♪ (country music ballad) ♪

♪ (country music ballad) ♪

-You hold a
girl like this.

(chuckles)

-This song
is makin' me sad.

-This song
is makin' me sad.

I-I-I'd better go.

I-It was good talkin'
to you though.

I-It was good talkin'
to you though.

♪ (music fades) ♪

-I guess you spoke
to your mom.

-I guess you spoke
to your mom.

(sighs)

You all right?

-I'm fine.

-Oh, Toby. Hi.

-Oh, Toby. Hi.

What's wrong?

You act like you've
never seen a bra before.

-Here, my dad told me
to bring you this dirt.

-Here, my dad told me
to bring you this dirt.

-It's not dirt, it's soil.

Fertilized and aerated
by your dad's worms.

Fertilized and aerated
by your dad's worms.

How do you think he
knew I needed more?

-I don't know.
You know how he is.

-I don't know.
You know how he is.

-Hey, are you wearing
contact lenses?

-Yeah, my mom said
they look better.

-Yeah, my mom said
they look better.

-You do look more grown-up.

Oh, how'd your mom
do last night?

Oh, how'd your mom
do last night?

-The Country Music Television
place had a fire...

-The Country Music Television
place had a fire...

-Oh.

-And they postponed the contest

-And they postponed the contest

-How horrible.
Was anybody hurt?

-No, it just burned the
part where they're holding it.

-No, it just burned the
part where they're holding it.

-Oh, I see.

-They haven't
rescheduled it yet,

-They haven't
rescheduled it yet,

but, uh, my mom's
hanging out till it's over.

-Hmm, well, give her my
best when you talk to her.

-Okay.

-Cal's inside, I think.

-Cal's inside, I think.

-Hey.

-Oh, hey, Toby. How ya doin'?

-Oh, hey, Toby. How ya doin'?

-Um... I'm cool. Hi.

-Um... I'm cool. Hi.

-Famous people always
get the best clothes,

things you can't buy
around here, like, this.

things you can't buy
around here, like, this.

I love her top.

-I gotta have lunch
made or my mom will

freak out.

-My dad likes to cook.

-Don't you wear glasses?

-I did. Contacts.

-I did. Contacts.

-Oh.

Would you get my CD player?
It's in my room.

Would you get my CD player?
It's in my room.

-Scarlet, Toby's...

-Scarlet, Toby's...

... spraying your perfume!

-I am not spraying perfume.

-Weirdo!

-Weirdo!

♪ Toby is a weirdo! ♪

♪ Toby is a weirdo! ♪

♪ Toby is a weirdo! ♪

-I did not spray your perfume.

But I got this. Nice radio.

I spilled, then the top
fell off and the--

then I put it back.

-Na-ah. You sprayed
some perfume.

-Na-ah. You sprayed
some perfume.

-Tara, vamos! Fuera!

-Tara, vamos! Fuera!

No language works
on this brat!

Juan was helping me learn
Spanish before...

Juan was helping me learn
Spanish before...

(phone rings)

-Hello?

What do you want?

What do you want?

Speaking of the devil,
it's Juan.

-Toby, I wanna see him again.

-Toby, I wanna see him again.

I don't want
to talk to you.

-Take me to the fat man.

-I have company.

-I have company.

-I wanna see the fat man!

-Who? Toby Wilson.

-I wanna see him.
Toby, I wanna see him!

-I wanna see him.
Toby, I wanna see him!

-Don't call back.

(sighs) Hey, baby.

(clears throat)

(sighs)

(sighs)

Are you Heather's
boy Timmy?

-Toby. Yes, m'am.

-You look different.

-You look different.

(sighs) Anyhow, your mama's at
that singing competition, right?

How'd she do?

-Uh, it's been postponed.
There was a fire.

-Fire? Where?

-Fire? Where?

-At Country Music Television.

-Bull! I was just
watchin' it at work.

-Bull! I was just
watchin' it at work.

They never said a thing
and they were

broadcastin' just fine.

broadcastin' just fine.

Look, it doesn't matter
if she didn't win.

I'm proud of
her for just tryin'

I'm proud of
her for just tryin'

to get out of this town.

-Toby, I wanna see him.

(KNOCK AT THE TOOR)

-Come in.

-Come in.

-What are you doin' here?

-Where have you been?

-Where have you been?

Oh.

Hey, squirt.

-He's blowin' up! Eew!

-He's blowin' up! Eew!

-Bahh!

(laughing) Oh, man.

(laughing) Oh, man.

(laughing)

-Where are your glasses?

-Contacts.

-You look weird.

-What's that smell-- perfume?

-What's that smell-- perfume?

-No.

-Hey, I heard about the fire.
That's wild.

-What fire?

-What fire?

-At Country Music
Television Studio.

Just a small one, but it
messed up some stuff

Just a small one, but it
messed up some stuff

my mom was doing there.

-Hey, when did your
mom die, anyway?

You said she got
you that bible

You said she got
you that bible

when you were baptized, right?

-I didn't never say
I got baptized.

I said I almost got baptized.

I said I almost got baptized.

-How does someone
almost get baptized?

-Have you ever been baptized?

-Have you ever been baptized?

-No.

-Toby, take me home!

-Gotta go.

-Gotta go.

-See ya.

-See ya.

-Toby, the contest
was last night and

I've finally calmed down.

I've finally calmed down.

Now, what I'm about to
write to you is pretty

darn hard for me, and it
has nothing to do

darn hard for me, and it
has nothing to do

with whether I won or not.

I didn't, but never mind that.
(sighs)

I didn't, but never mind that.
(sighs)

Me and your dad have been havin'
a rough time of it lately,

and I need some time to
figure some things out.

and I need some time to
figure some things out.

Don't go blamin'
yourself.

Don't go blamin'
yourself.

You are the best son
that a mother could have.

And I'm not leaving you.

Your father has
my phone number

Your father has
my phone number

and I'm only a
phone call away.

Come to think of it, that
would make a really

good title for a song.

good title for a song.

♪ Though you're miles apart ♪

♪ You're still in my heart ♪

♪ You're still in my heart ♪

♪ Love's just a
phone call-- ♪

♪ Love's just a
phone call-- ♪

-Son. Listen, I don't
think we'll bother

-Son. Listen, I don't
think we'll bother

with the worm run today.

-The bait shops are waiting.

-The bait shops are waiting.

-Let's give the fish a break.

-Let's give the fish a break.

-Dad? Dad.

(yells) Damn it, Dad!

(yells) Damn it, Dad!

-Hey, you don't use that
kind of language.

-How else can I get
your attention?

-You try that stunt again,
you're gonna get

-You try that stunt again,
you're gonna get

the wrong kind of attention.

Now, put the worms back,
like I told you.

Now, put the worms back,
like I told you.

(sighs) This is what I think of
your freakin' worms.

-You shouldn't have done that.

-You shouldn't have done that.

-What does it matter.
Mom's left.

You care more about the worms.

You care more about the worms.

Nobody cares about me.

-I do. I've provided a
very good life for you

and your mother-- a very
good, quality life.

and your mother-- a very
good, quality life.

I guess it wasn't excitin'
enough for your Mom.

I guess it wasn't excitin'
enough for your Mom.

Maybe that's why she
ain't comin' back.

-You don't know that.
She may come back.

-You don't know that.
She may come back.

What if she doesn't?

What if she doesn't?

What's gonna happen to us?

-We're gonna be fine.

-We're gonna be fine.

We're gonna live here
and we'll be fine.

We're gonna live here
and we'll be fine.

After you grow up,

you can decide where and what
your life's gonna be,

but until then, this is it.

but until then, this is it.

-Then, I can't wait
to grow up.

-Then, I can't wait
to grow up.

-Social Services is comin'
for him tomorrow.

So we gotta do it.

So we gotta do it.

-What does Social Services do
with abandoned children?

-What does Social Services do
with abandoned children?

-Foster homes or some
juvenile center place.

(Phone rings)

(Phone rings)

-I bet he won't go for it.

-I bet he will.

-This is she. Oh,
man, this is great--

-This is she. Oh,
man, this is great--

-How would he fit in the car.

-How would he fit in the car.

-We take the pickup.
He rides in the back.

They're on their way.

Ladybugs arrive on this
afternoon's train.

-Then we'll set the
dance for tomorrow.

-Then we'll set the
dance for tomorrow.

-Okay.

-Yeah, let's do it for him.

-Who would drive us?

-Who would drive us?

-Absolutely not. If you think
I'm gonna have

any part of making fun
of somebody,

then you're wrong.

then you're wrong.

-I'm not making fun of him.

-Right.

(grunts)
We're not, honest.

(grunts)
We're not, honest.

Just think he might want
to see a drive-in movie.

Just think he might want
to see a drive-in movie.

Just forget it, Toby, okay?

Some people are too
important to help out

a lonely guy on his way to
foster home misery.

a lonely guy on his way to
foster home misery.

(sighs) I wanna
meet him first.

(sighs) I wanna
meet him first.

(sighs) I'm not goin'
anywhere.

-We have a truck. We could all
ride in the back.

-We have a truck. We could all
ride in the back.

-Forget it.

-Forget it.

(CAR ENGINE STOPS)

-Who's that?

-Oh, that's our chauffeur.
She's fully licensed.

-Oh, that's our chauffeur.
She's fully licensed.

-Kate, meet Zachary.
Zachary, Kate.

-Kate, meet Zachary.
Zachary, Kate.

-Hi.

-Hi.

-I understand your mom
died two years ago.

That means you're
only 12, right?

That means you're
only 12, right?

-Yeah.

-Uh, was she fat too?
-What?

-She was a big lady.

Big heart, too. (sighs)

Big heart, too. (sighs)

Went to church all the time.

-Is it hard having people walk
through your home,

-Is it hard having people walk
through your home,

looking at you?

-Well, they're gonna
stare, anyway.

I mean, I might as well
get paid for it.

I mean, I might as well
get paid for it.

But pretty soon the money's
gonna be even better.

But pretty soon the money's
gonna be even better.

Paulie and I are
adding new acts.

I mean, that's what
he's doin' right now.

I mean, that's what
he's doin' right now.

But, these people here,
they don't get it.

-Why didn't he take
you with him?

-Why didn't he take
you with him?

-It's easier for me
to stay here.

(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWS)

(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWS)

-There's the train.

We've some ladybugs to meet.
Let's go.

-Ladybugs?

-Ladybugs?

-Organic farming. I'll tell
you about it tonight.

You're coming, right?

You're coming, right?

-What time should I be ready?

-Mom, look!

-Wow, look at all of 'em.

-Do we leave 'em
in the truck?

-Do we leave 'em
in the truck?

-I think so.

Cal, you and Kate
get washed up.

Supper's almost ready.

And, Kate, will
you set the table?

And, Kate, will
you set the table?

-Okay.

-See ya in an hour.

-Hey, Toby. Come here a minute.

-Hey, Toby. Come here a minute.

-Yes, m'am?

-You know, I know you
must really miss your mom.

-You know, I know you
must really miss your mom.

I sure did.

You know, it takes a
really brave person

You know, it takes a
really brave person

to go after their dream.

You ought to be proud of her.

My dream was to go searching
for lost rose breeds

My dream was to go searching
for lost rose breeds

through the southeast.

It can be kind of cool,
to be able to travel

It can be kind of cool,
to be able to travel

around like that.

-Mrs. McKnight?

-Yes?

-Yes?

-Ma'am, is your
husband home?

-Ma'am, is your
husband home?

I think you may need to
have him with you.

-What is this about? Tell me.

-What is this about? Tell me.

-It's about your son,
Private Wayne McKnight.

Ma'am, is your husband home?

-No. Tell me, what
about Wayne?

Is he hurt? Is he okay?

Is he hurt? Is he okay?

-There was a routine
surveillance mission.

An accident occurred.

(bursts into tears)

(bursts into tears)

There were no survivors.

-No.
(crying) No!

-No.
(crying) No!

-We're sorry.

(screams)

(screams)

-Toby.

-Toby.

(moans)

-Tob-- somethin' wrong?

-Hey, son?
(KNOCKING)

-Hey, son?
(KNOCKING)

Di-Did you talk to your
mother? Toby?

Di-Did you talk to your
mother? Toby?

(sighs)

(LADYBUGS BUZZING)

(LADYBUGS BUZZING)

(BUZZING CONTINUES)

(BUZZING CONTINUES)

(BUZZING CONTINUES)

(BUZZING CONTINUES)

-Shut up! Shut up!

-Shut up! Shut up!

-Shut up!

Shut Up! Shut Up!

Shut Up! Shut Up!

Shut Up! Shut Up!

Shut Up! Shut Up!

(SNIFFS & SOBS)

(SNIFFS & SOBS)

-We have to dress up for
the wake, you know.

It's time to go.

It's time to go.

-I'm not going.

-I'm not going.

-He was Cal's brother.

-I know that.

-I know that.

-He's gonna need you.

Have you even spoken to him yet?

Have you even spoken to him yet?

-No.

-What's goin' on here?

-What's goin' on here?

-I just don't feel like going.

-We have to go.
Our friends need us.

-We have to go.
Our friends need us.

Understand?

Understand?

I'll see you there.

I'll see you there.

(Telephone rings)

(Telephone rings)

-Hello?

MOM: Toby? Oh, thank goodness.

I had a feeling
that you might be there.

I had a feeling
that you might be there.

I heard about Wayne.

That's awful.
Are you okay?

That's awful.
Are you okay?

-You're like me, you can't
handle sad.

We're not like your dad
that way, are we?

We're not like your dad
that way, are we?

Are you there?

-I'm here.

-I'm here.

-I miss you.

I don't know what I'd do if
I ever lost you, honey.

They might as well just dig
another grave for me.

They might as well just dig
another grave for me.

-I want you to come see me

while there's still some
summer left, okay?

while there's still some
summer left, okay?

-I'm tryin' real
hard here, Tob.

-I'm tryin' real
hard here, Tob.

-I gotta go.

-I lov--
(TOBY HANGS UP)

-Toby Wilson, what are
you doing out here?

-Toby Wilson, what are
you doing out here?

-God damn-it.

When's your mama coming Back?

When's your mama coming Back?

I can't run that
diner by myself.

I can't run that
diner by myself.

-Are you all right?

-Yeah...

-Yeah...

no... I-- I have a
nasty cold.

I can't-- Keep me from going to
the Wayne's thing.

I can't-- Keep me from going to
the Wayne's thing.

Why aren't you there?

Why aren't you there?

-Uh...

-I really liked Wayne, too.

-I really liked Wayne, too.

I did.

Son of a bitch
shames me.

I admit it!

I admit it!

I did what everybody said.
I-- I avoided my duty...

to stay out. Back in '67.

to stay out. Back in '67.

I shot myself in the leg, bang!

I shot myself in the leg, bang!

Like that.

(GRUNTS & GROANS)

(GRUNTS & GROANS)

Don't ever start
drinkin'.

Don't ever start
drinkin'.

Next to money, it's
the root of all evil.

(KNOCK KNOCK)

(KNOCK KNOCK)

(video game sounds)
-Go away.

-Hi.

-Enjoy the movie?

-Enjoy the movie?

(sighs) Something came up.

Did anybody tell you?

Did anybody tell you?

-I don't care anyway.

What happened to
your contacts?

-Those were
my mother's idea.

-Those were
my mother's idea.

(sighs)

(sighs)

They're taking you
away today, right?

-Yeah. It's gonna be awful.

-Yeah. It's gonna be awful.

-Do you really know
where Paulie is?

-Do you really know
where Paulie is?

-I told you. Bishop.

(chuckles) Let's go get him.

-How'd you learn to drive?

-How'd you learn to drive?

-When I deliver worms
with my dad, he lets

me drive on the
back roads sometimes.

me drive on the
back roads sometimes.

-Is this your first
time on the highway?

-Yes.

-Yes.

-Look, I'm a valuable asset.

Now, drive carefully.

-Yeah. You should navigate.

-Yeah. You should navigate.

Tell me how far it
is to the turnoff.

(gust of wind)

-It reminds me of the sea.

-What?

-What?

-The fields. It looks like an
ocean.

-I don't see it.

-You don't know how to look.

-You don't know how to look.

You have to really
look at something.

(MOTORCYCLE ENGINES ROAR)

-What are you lookin' at?

-How much further?

-I don't know.

-I don't know.

-Check the map.

-What map?

-The map. The one I gave you.

-The map. The one I gave you.

-You never gave me a map.

-Bet ya they have maps.

-Whatever.

-Hey! Pick up some
Mars bars wi--

with the map, will
ya? I'm starvin'!

with the map, will
ya? I'm starvin'!

(laughter)
Hey, look at that fat-ass!

(laughter)
Hey, look at that fat-ass!

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

(laughing)

That's too much for
that little truck.

That's too much for
that little truck.

Hi, Ray. Who's driving
that truck with the

Hi, Ray. Who's driving
that truck with the

humongous kid in the back?

-Umm... the man he's with
is in the bathroom.

-Umm... the man he's with
is in the bathroom.

Says he's taking
him to Granger.

Says he's taking
him to Granger.

Oh, not with him in
the back like that.

That's a hazard like that.

-Sure is.

-Sure is.

(tires screech)

-What are you doin'?

-What are you doin'?

-We gotta go!

If that officer caught you,
we're up!

-Take it easy, cowboy!

-Here's the cut-off!

-Here's the cut-off!

We've gotta hide!

-What the heck?

-What the heck?

(tires spin)

-Come on.

(tires spin)

(tires spin)

-Look! Toby, look!

-Look! Toby, look!

(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWS)

(tires spin)

(tires spin)

-Come on! Get out! Quick!

-Come on! Get out! Quick!

(screaming) Get out!

-Put something under the wheel
for traction.

A stick, something! Go on!

A stick, something! Go on!

-Hurry!

-Hurry!

-Under it!

(grunts)

-Come on! Get up! Get up!

-Come on! Get up! Get up!

(Train whistle blows)

-Go on! Get in the car!

Come on!

(tires squeal)

-We did it!

-We did it!

-You okay?

-We did it! We did it!

-We did it! We did it!

-Can't catch us!

-We're unstoppable!

-We're unstoppable!

-That's great. That's great.

(SCREAMS)

-Are you okay?

What happened?

What happened?

-I think the road
gave way under us.

(distant howling)

(distant howling)

-Maybe when the
man-eating coyotes leave

we can get a ride. How
much further to Paulie?

we can get a ride. How
much further to Paulie?

-I don't know.

-I don't know.

I don't know where Paulie is.

The circus has gone
from Bishop by now.

The circus has gone
from Bishop by now.

I know he'll be back.

But I don't know when

But I don't know when

and I don't know where
he is anymore.

and I don't know where
he is anymore.

(sighs) I lied.

-How could you lie like that?

-How could you lie like that?

-I didn't want those people to
take me away.

Let's just get a ride
back to Granger.

-I don't want to go
back to Granger.

-I don't want to go
back to Granger.

-Why not?

-You know Cal's brother Wayne?

He died.

He died.

That's why we couldn't go
to the drive- in.

That's why we couldn't go
to the drive- in.

He was like a big brother to
me. But nobody gets that.

He was like a big brother to
me. But nobody gets that.

They expect me to wait
around for stupid Cal.

He never even wrote him back.

He never even wrote him back.

I feel worse than Cal does.
(sighs)

I feel worse than Cal does.
(sighs)

-I understand why you left.

-I understand why you left.

Hey, listen.
The howling stopped.

Hey, listen.
The howling stopped.

-Thomas Edison was so smart.

He even invented stuff
out of order.

He even invented stuff
out of order.

He invented the record
player in 1877,

He invented the record
player in 1877,

but the microphone wasn't
invented until 1878.

Think about it.

Think about it.

What recordings could
Edison's player play

that first year. Weird, huh?

that first year. Weird, huh?

-You sure know a lot of stuff.

Have you ever been
to a funeral?

Have you ever been
to a funeral?

-Yeah, my mother's.
It was awful.

-Yeah, my mother's.
It was awful.

They had to make
a special casket.

She was like me,
you know. Bigger.

She was like me,
you know. Bigger.

(sighs) Anyway, CNN showed up,
Dateline--

(sighs) Anyway, CNN showed up,
Dateline--

lookin' for human-
interest news.

When they saw me,
it got out of hand.

When they saw me,
it got out of hand.

It was supposed to be private.

-What happened to your dad?

-Gone since I was a baby.

-Gone since I was a baby.

So Paulie's my legal guardian,

the closest thing I've
got to family.

the closest thing I've
got to family.

-My mom's staying
in Nashville.

She left us for a shot at a
singing career.

She left us for a shot at a
singing career.

I don't know when I'll
ever see her again.

I don't know when I'll
ever see her again.

(sighing) I thought I
was going to die

Before-- The train. And I
thought then, that

Before-- The train. And I
thought then, that

I'd never see my mother again.

I'd never see my mother again.

-But your mother's
already dead.

-That's why she wanted
me to get baptized--

-That's why she wanted
me to get baptized--

so I could see her
again in heaven.

so I could see her
again in heaven.

-So, since your
weren't baptized,

you can't go to heaven?

you can't go to heaven?

-Apparently they
don't let you in.

You know, you
got yourself

a pretty mellow daddy,
there, my man.

I- I'd count my
blessings on that.

I- I'd count my
blessings on that.

I'd be major p. o.' d if my
boy took my truck

and carried around a, uh--

and carried around a, uh--

I mean, how much
does he weigh?

...He makes my lie down
in green pastures.

...He makes my lie down
in green pastures.

He Leads me on the path of
righteousness for

His name' sake

His name' sake

Even though I walk through the
valley of the shadow of death,

I fear no evil, for
thou art with me

I fear no evil, for
thou art with me

Thy rod and thy staff,
they comfort me... "

Thy rod and thy staff,
they comfort me... "

TOW TRUCK DRIVER:
Good luck to you!

-You boys are in
a lot a trouble.

A lot of trouble.

A lot of trouble.

Otto woke up everybody,
lookin' for auto thieves,

kidnappers,
you name it.

kidnappers,
you name it.

(car horn honks)

And it was not a good
day for it either.

Don't ever start drinkin,
boys.

Next to Money--

Next to Money--

-It's the root of all evil.

-Who told you that?

-I think I've heard it
once or twice.

-Well, don't even think
about goin' anywhere.

-Well, don't even think
about goin' anywhere.

You're dad's on the way.

And the Sheriff's comin' to see
you, Mr. Beaver...

And the Sheriff's comin' to see
you, Mr. Beaver...

and let you know they'll
be takin' you away

later today.

later today.

-My dad's gonna kill me.

-Here.

-Here.

Sixty- seven dollars.

All the money I owe for
my tab. We're even.

All the money I owe for
my tab. We're even.

And you lie, just as much as
your new best friend.

And you lie, just as much as
your new best friend.

Everyone knows about your mom.

Everyone knows about your mom.

She's never... coming... back.

She's never... coming... back.

Never, ever...

(gasps)
...coming back.

Like Wayne.

Like Wayne.

-Why don't you tell your
little friend that you

-Why don't you tell your
little friend that you

can't visit right now.

Come and see me inside.

-Thanks for the necklace,

but I can't keep it.

but I can't keep it.

-Why not?

-It's too much gift.

-It's too much gift.

My mom said I have
to return it to ya.

And... pearls remind
me of somethin'

And... pearls remind
me of somethin'

an old lady would
wear. I'm sorry.

an old lady would
wear. I'm sorry.

-My mom never
wore 'em either.

-My mom never
wore 'em either.

-Did you really steal
your dad's truck and

drive halfway to Bishop?

drive halfway to Bishop?

Wow.

Bye.

-Is that a present?

-Is that a present?

-No.

-Then what is it?

-It's nothing.

-Hey. Come back here.

-Hey. Come back here.

-I'm not mad at you.
-Good.

-I'm not mad at you.
-Good.

Son, do you
have any idea

what you put me through,
waitin' to hear

what you put me through,
waitin' to hear

from you last night? Do you?

-If your not mad
at me, why are you yelling?

-If your not mad
at me, why are you yelling?

(sighs) I don't know.

-Whatever. Just leave
me alone, okay?

-Whatever. Just leave
me alone, okay?

-I see you up there.

Come on, Toby.

-You're gonna fall.

-You're gonna fall.

-I used to be a pretty good
climber, too.

I spent all last night dreading
I'd never see you again.

I spent all last night dreading
I'd never see you again.

I'm not mad.
I'm relieved.

Wayne's folks--
they aren't so lucky.

Wayne's folks--
they aren't so lucky.

They don' t get
him back, do they?

-I know. Life sucks.

-I know. Life sucks.

I can't count on
anyone or anything.

-You can. You can count on me.

-You can. You can count on me.

And you can count
on your mother.

You can go and see her
whenever you want.

You can go and see her
whenever you want.

-I don't wanna have
to go to see her.

It shouldn't be like that.

It shouldn't be like that.

-But it is.

It's not the end of the World.

It just feels like it.

You're mother and me, we,
uh-- (sighing)

You're mother and me, we,
uh-- (sighing)

Well, I thought we wanted the
same thing in life,

Well, I thought we wanted the
same thing in life,

but we don't.

but we don't.

We both love you, though. That's
about all I know for sure.

-I hate this.

-I hate this.

-Me, too.

(They sigh)

(They sigh)

-Dad...

-Dad...

I did something really bad.

-I'm sorry.

-I'm sorry.

-Really. Here.

You know, his picture's
still in there.

-And one, more thing.
I wrote him back

and signed it "From Cal,"
as if I were you.

and signed it "From Cal,"
as if I were you.

-Just keep it!

-Cal!

-Stop!

(grunts)

-Cal! Stop!

-No!

-Stop!

-Come on, let me help you.

-I don't care!

-I don't care!

-You wanna fight? I'll fight!

-God damn it!

-God damn it!

(fighting grunts)

(fighting grunts)

-I'm sorry, man.

I'm sorry!

Come on.

-Help me with my bike.

-Whoo.

Yeah, man, you actually hurt me.

Yeah, man, you actually hurt me.

(chuckles) Good.

Oh, my letter.

Oh, my letter.

I should have written
him back myself.

-I should have gone
to the funeral.

-I should have gone
to the funeral.

-So... what did I write
him about?

-So... what did I write
him about?

-What a fun summer you
and I were having.

How we would eat
snow cones for him--

How we would eat
snow cones for him--

Stuff like that.

-Yeah, well, know that
he's up in heaven,

he can probably see
everything we're doin'.

he can probably see
everything we're doin'.

-I bet us riding our
bikes into the lake

impressed him.

(laughing) Oh, yeah,
I'm sure it did.

(laughing) Oh, yeah,
I'm sure it did.

You know, did that get
in the water at all?

You know, did that get
in the water at all?

It's kind of like he finally
got baptized.

-Yeah. Wait... this
could work.

-Yeah. Wait... this
could work.

You're a genius!

You're a genius!

-Found it.

-Do you think it even
counts if we do it ourselves?

-Let's see what it says.

There it is.

Does this make any sense to you?

Does this make any sense to you?

-None.

It's not exactly an
instruction manual.

It's not exactly an
instruction manual.

-We need help.

-I ain't a preacher.

-I ain't a preacher.

-But you're almost one.
My mom told me.

-Almost and is ain't the same.

-Almost and is ain't the same.

What's all this about?

-We need to get Zachary
baptized before

-We need to get Zachary
baptized before

they take him away
and it's too late.

-We have to get him
baptized so he can

get into heaven... to see his
mom.

get into heaven... to see his
mom.

-It sounds like you better go
see Reverend Newton.

-No. He'll make us use
the baptistery in the church.

-No. He'll make us use
the baptistery in the church.

-That's how it's done.

-Zachary wouldn't fit. (sighs)

-Zachary wouldn't fit. (sighs)

He wouldn't even go for it.

If word got out,
there'd be a crowd.

If word got out,
there'd be a crowd.

-How will you baptize
that boy without a Baptistery?

-Gossamer Lake.

-Gossamer Lake.

-You'd be trespassing.
Besides, somebody might drown.

-Not if you came.

-Not if you came.

-No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I don't need the trouble.

I don't need the trouble.

(DOG BARKS)

-Come on, man.
We've got to hurry.

-I don't even understand this.

Can you at least explain it?

Matthew 3:14 and 15.

-Well, yeah. This is about
Jesus tryin' to get

-Well, yeah. This is about
Jesus tryin' to get

John the Baptist
to baptize him.

But John doesn't think he's
good enough.

But John doesn't think he's
good enough.

But he's Jesus!

-So what happens?

-So what happens?

-Well, gather up what
stuff you can and I'll--

I'll send the rest.

I'll send the rest.

(dog whimpers)

Look. I know it's hard,
but it'll go better if

you cooperate.

you cooperate.

"For thus becometh...

... us to fulfill
righteousness."

... us to fulfill
righteousness."

Get it?

Jesus is sayin', that
by John, doin' the act,

Jesus is sayin', that
by John, doin' the act,

he will become
worth of doin' it.

-Um-hm. So he does it.

-Um-hm. So he does it.

-Of course he does it!

-Then you'll do it for
Zachary?

(sighs) I didn't say that.

(sighs) I didn't say that.

-We need you, Ferris.
Come on.

-We need you, Ferris.
Come on.

Gossamer Lake, five o'clock.

-Or, we'll try it ourselves,
and God know if...

... he'll get into
heaven or not.

... he'll get into
heaven or not.

-Oh... it's you guys.

Why are you all dressed up?

-Zachary Beaver, we're
here to take you

to your baptism.

-I'm not goin' to any church.

-You're not.
We're gonna baptize you.

-How? They're
comin' for me any minute.

-We have it all
planned out. Trust us.

-We have it all
planned out. Trust us.

(yelling) Ferris? Ferris?

(yelling) Ferris? Ferris?

Guess we're' gonna have
to do this ourselves.

Guess we're' gonna have
to do this ourselves.

-Do you even know
which chapter?

-Do you even know
which chapter?

-Sorry I'm late.

I decided to take
Matthew's word for it.

I decided to take
Matthew's word for it.

-Do you prefer the long

or the Short version?

or the Short version?

-Will the short work
just as well?

-Yes, sir. It's a personal
preference.

My dinner rush starts
in a half an hour.

My dinner rush starts
in a half an hour.

-Short'll do.
This water's cold.

-Short'll do.
This water's cold.

-You got a middle name?

(mumbles)

-Alvin?

-Alvin?

-Elvis.

-Elvis?

-It's a fine name.

-It's a fine name.

Do you, Zachary Elvis Beaver,
take the Lord

Do you, Zachary Elvis Beaver,
take the Lord

Jesus Christ as your Saviour?

-Yeah.

-I can't hear you.

-Yeah!

-Yeah!

-That's the way!

I baptize you in the
name of the Father,

I baptize you in the
name of the Father,

the Son and the Holy Ghost.

Whosoever believes in him
shall not perish,

Whosoever believes in him
shall not perish,

but have everlasting
life. Amen.

but have everlasting
life. Amen.

It's time for your plunge.

-Don't be afraid.
We won't drop you.

-Come on.

-Come on.

(straining) Lift him up.
Come on.

(grunts)

-God bless you,
Zachary Beaver.

-God bless you,
Zachary Beaver.

-Yeah.

(they laugh)

(knocks on door)

(knocks on door)

-It's okay. Let's go.

-Now what? Oh, I can't
wait to put an end

-Now what? Oh, I can't
wait to put an end

to this nonsense.

-What on earth?
Have you all been

-What on earth?
Have you all been

swimming?

-Somethin' like that.

(sighs) Zachary, we've
got important

(sighs) Zachary, we've
got important

business to
take care of.

These people are from the State
Social Services Office.

These people are from the State
Social Services Office.

-And they'll find
somewhere to place you.

-And they'll find
somewhere to place you.

Better than bein' left in
a tin can in an empty lot.

They'll find you a
good home.

They'll find you a
good home.

-That tin can
is my home.

(sighs) Where are they gonna
take me, Sheriff?

(sighs) Where are they gonna
take me, Sheriff?

-Away, right Sheriff?

-Away, right Sheriff?

It doesn't matter where, as long
as he's away from here. Right?

It doesn't matter where, as long
as he's away from here. Right?

(HORN HONKS)

-Paulie, welcome back, ya bum!

-Hey, what, are ya in
some kind of trouble?

-Hey, what, are ya in
some kind of trouble?

-Actually, Mr. Rankin,
I'm afraid you're in trouble.

-Very big trouble.

-Very big trouble.

-What?

Wha-- What did he do?

What did you-- I can't
leave you alone for,

for a couple a days
now without

for a couple a days
now without

all hell breakin' loose?
Why, I oughta--

-Hey, hey, just
calm down.

That's the whole point. You
can't leave this boy alone.

That's the whole point. You
can't leave this boy alone.

You are the guardian. It's not
legal and it's not right.

You are the guardian. It's not
legal and it's not right.

Not right? Not right.
Well, all tell ya-- all of you

Not right? Not right.
Well, all tell ya-- all of you

what's not right. What's
not right is,

when I, his guardian, tries to
make a better life

when I, his guardian, tries to
make a better life

for the kid by expanding
our business.

for the kid by expanding
our business.

And this insane country,
called Texas,

throws everything at me, to
stick it to me, to-to-to

throws everything at me, to
stick it to me, to-to-to

screw me, to-- I can't get one
hour outside

of this town before fascist
obstacle number one:

of this town before fascist
obstacle number one:

a speed trap sends
me straight to a

game of Texas Hold
'Em-- county jail version.

game of Texas Hold
'Em-- county jail version.

I'm required to pay
cash--fascist obstacle

number two-- of which
I don't have enough.

number two-- of which
I don't have enough.

So, what do I do? I'm
forced to spend three days

washing dishes, with no
rights, normally reserved

washing dishes, with no
rights, normally reserved

for citizens
of the United States,

which, apparently I
left when I came

which, apparently I
left when I came

to Texas. Then I'm finally
able to make a phone call.

I dial the number
that he gave me...

I dial the number
that he gave me...

No answer, all day!

-Ferris, did you
remember any calls?

-Ferris, did you
remember any calls?

-I don't hear phones
so good sometimes.

-So, what can I do?
I now have exactly one day

-So, what can I do?
I now have exactly one day

to drive halfway
across this state to

catch up to Pablo and
Esther, here,

catch up to Pablo and
Esther, here,

who were expectin' me
days ago, to meet with them

about joinin' our-our
growin' enterprise.

about joinin' our-our
growin' enterprise.

Eh, you know,
Esther's a dancer.

Pablo's a contortionist.

Pablo's a contortionist.

Pablo, Esther, do your--
You know, give 'em a taste

of-of-of the act.

You got it, Wizard.

You got it, Wizard.

-Watch this.

(APPLAUSE)

(APPLAUSE)

-Bravo. Incre-- Incredible.
Isn't that amazing?

I tell ya, I seen a lot of
things, but anyway,

I tell ya, I seen a lot of
things, but anyway,

I drive today, all day,
through, God knows,

how many speed traps to
get back to my

how many speed traps to
get back to my

business partner.

-Zachary, are you a legal
partner in this Business?

-Zachary, are you a legal
partner in this Business?

-I think so. Am I, Paulie?

-Yeah, of course, you are.

-Yeah, of course, you are.

-Well, I don't know whether
to take his word

and turn you loose, or
take him in for abandonment.

and turn you loose, or
take him in for abandonment.

What really matters

is, what you wanna
do, Zachary.

is, what you wanna
do, Zachary.

You've got a choice, and you
do not have to stay with

Paulie if you don't want to.

Paulie if you don't want to.

-I'm gonna stick with Paulie.

-I'm gonna stick with Paulie.

-Good move, Zach.

-Now, you sure about that?

-Now, you sure about that?

-I'm sure.

-Zachary's life was
going to be

different now, and so
was mine and Cal's.

We figured something out:

We figured something out:

There really is no such thing a
normal.

But when we help each other,
there can be such a thing as

But when we help each other,
there can be such a thing as

extraordinary.

-Can I get a picture?

-Yeah, sure.

-Yeah, sure.

-Wayne's gone, but

he'll always be with us.
I know that now.

he'll always be with us.
I know that now.

-This is for you.

-This is for you.

-Thank you.

-Thank you.

-Ready?

-Good luck, everybody.

-Good luck, everybody.

I hope y'all like Mozart.

♪ (Mozart plays) ♪

♪ (Mozart plays) ♪

♪♪

-Oh my God...

-Oh my God...

-Oh my God...

-Wow! Did you see that?

-What are you boys
doin' up on my roof?

-What are you boys
doin' up on my roof?

Watchin' the comin'
and goin' of Granger?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-Mostly the goings.

(both chuckle)

-Well, why don't
ya come on inside?

I'll fix ya a
breakfast special.

I'll fix ya a
breakfast special.

-You got any money?

-It's on the house.

-All right! Yeah!

-All right! Yeah!

-Yeah.

-Do you see 'em anymore?

-Do you see 'em anymore?

-Nah.