What Scoundrels Men Are! (1932) - full transcript

Bruno, a young Milanese driver, falls in love with Mariuccia, dependent on a perfumery. Wanting to impress her, he shows up for their first date, in his employer's car.

WHAT SCOUNDRELS MEN ARE...

- Is that OK?
- Yes.

- Hey, Tadino.
- Hey.

105.

100...

and five, OK?
- OK.

- Good Morning.
- Morning.

Here you go!

- How did it go?
- Well, it could have gone better.

This is the man who steals our bread.

Go to hell!



Hey, sleepyhead. Wake up!

Good morning.

- Did you sleep well?
- Yes, daddy.

Get up and go to work!

Ouch, ouch!

Bye, dad.

- Thanks.
- You're welcome.

Charming... I like you very much.

Miss...

- Why don't you tell your friend...
- Just go away.

After all, we don't like guys
who ride on bicycles!

I get it. You prefer cars...

- Of course!
- We'll buy a car then.

- Good morning.
- Good morning, madam.



- Good morning, madam.
- Good morning.

Tell me, Mariuccia,
has he been following you for long?

- I didn't see him.
- You didn't notice, eh?

As if the men didn't exist for you.

I think he's a nice guy.

Enough now. Come on, we're late.

- Hey there. How are you?
- Hi.

- What are you doing?
- I'm taking the car today.

You have permission from the boss?

That one never goes out.

- Bruno!
- What?

Call for you.

- Who is it?
- The boss.

Damn...

Hello? Bruno?
Have the car here today at 1 pm.

Well, sir...
The spark plugs are dirty.

The spark plugs? Change them!

Yes...

I should add that the car is broken.

Broken?

- But it'll be ready for tomorrow.
- Tomorrow? No doing!

- My wife needs the car today.
- Let it go. We'll just take Olga's car.

As if we didn't have our own.

Alright, alright, tomorrow then.

You see?

- So?
- Nothing.

What time is it?

11:05 am.

- 90, 112...
- Good day, madam.

- Shall I come today?
- No, we will deliver tomorrow.

- Thanks.
- Goodbye.

Goodbye, madam.

- Goodbye, madam.
- Goodbye, girls.

- Where are you going today?
- Me? To the Lakes.

Oh, here he is.

And you, Mariuccia,
where are you going today?

- Nowhere.
- See?

You could go bicycling
with that guy we saw this morning.

- Bye, Mariuccia.
- Bye.

- Bye, Mariuccia.
- Bye.

Look, miss...

I bought this just for you.

Yes, I did.

May I drive you home?

There is no harm in it.

But, quick. This is one-way street.
I will get fined.

Yes?

Where to?

- Corso Sempione.
- Fine.

Where are we going?

- Where are you taking me?
- We're just going for a little ride.

Don't be afraid.

- Slow down!
- Don't worry.

- Where are you we going?
- To the Lakes!

- The Lakes? You're mad! It's far away.
- Have you ever been there before?

- No, I haven't.
- Good.

You'll see.
We'll be there in an hour.

Here...

I told you it was worth the trip.

Wonderful...

Now, we'll take the steamboat.

- Are you tired?
- A little bit.

Let's sit down here.

No... Leave me alone.

Let's go home, shall we?
It's getting late.

- Why? Somebody is waiting for you?
- No.

So, let's pull up here
and have a drink.

- No, no.
- Yes, yes.

Waiter!

Ham, Muscat and... biscuits.

More!

Well done.

- Do you smoke?
- No, thanks.

Let's take a look.

Ah, "Mariù"!

- I know this song.
- Do you?

Lovely.

It's about you: Mariuccia.

- They are good dancers.
- Funny.

Here, on your heart
I don't suffer anymore.

How beautiful you are,
more than ever this evening, Mariù!

la, la, la, your blue eyes.

Even if the fates
should be contrary tomorrow

Today I am with you, why be sad?

Speak to me of love, Mariù!

I live only for you!

Your lovely eyes shine brightly.

They flash with a dreaming fire!

Tell me that this is no illusion.

Tell me that you are all mine!

Here, on your heart
I don't suffer anymore.

Speak to me of love, Mariù!

- Bravo!
- Thank you.

- Another one?
- No, no, thanks.

- Have a nice day.
- Bye.

Those brats! Please, wait a minute.
I'll be right back.

Bruno, what are you doing here?
You said the car was broken?

Yes, but I repaired it.

Then I went out to test it
and... I stopped here.

Well done! We've come
at the right moment! Get out of car.

Come Olga.
We'll have more space now.

- See you later then?
- Yes, yes.

Bruno, let's go.

Goodbye.

Go to the terrace, tell the young lady
sitting alone that I'll be back shortly.

Bruno, let's go. Hurry up!

Oh, my God, what a wild ride!

- It goes in the garage?
- Yes.

Damn!

- Look, my trolley is wrecked!
- You were in the middle of the road!

- You must keep to the right side.
- I was keeping to the right side!

- Oh, you, good.
- Calm down.

- Your papers, please.
- Here they are.

- I need to go to Arona. I'm in a hurry.
- You're not moving from here.

- But I really have to.
- Enough!

The street has to be cleared
as soon as possible.

- But I...
- Enough, I said!

I'm sorry, miss,
but we have to close.

- That's all I have.
- I get it. Please, wait a moment.

You're not paying, eh?

Where did that young man go?

You understand...

If I don't go home before
my dad goes back tomorrow morning...

I'm ruined.

Because, I swear, madam,
it's the first time...

Mom! I can give her a lift tomorrow.

- What are you doing there?
- Oh, madam, you would save me!

The lady can spend the night
in a separate room.

- Keep quiet!
- It doesn't matter to me!

All I need is
to get back in Milan in time!

There now...

Tell Rosa to make a bed.

Thanks. Thanks, madam.

Come on, stop crying.
The same happened to me.

What Scoundrels Men Are!

If you only knew
what happened to me...

Long ago, before my husband,
that kind soul, passed away,

I met a young, handsome man,
he wooed me and wooed me...

- See? On time.
- Bravo. Thanks. Bye.

Will you pay us a visit?

- I'm the owner.
- Really?

- May I?
- Oh, thanks.

Come on, sleepyhead, wake up!

Mariuccia?

- Did you sleep well?
- Yes, yes, dad.

Get up and go to work!

As for the trolley,
if you have confidence in me...

I could pay in monthly installments.
- Monthly installments?!

The trolley... And my car!
My destroyed car!

My smashed car,
who is going to pay for it?

Listen, I've already told you:
clear off!

Here is 100 liras, your wages
have now been paid.

Now, get out! Get out!

Goodbye, sir.

Please, come with me...

This one? No!

Goodbye.

- The cyclist is here.
- Where?

Outside.

What an insolent!

- You're an incorrigible flirt!
- I didn't do anything.

Stay here. Here!
This one, miss. Let's go.

- I have to pay.
- Go pay, come on.

- Mariuccia, listen...
- Can I help you?

- Last night I couldn't...
- Can I help you?

How can I help you?

A perfume, please.

- Eau de Cologne?
- Yes.

This one?

Yes.

- 120.
- No, no.

I prefer this one.

I understand. A women's perfume.

Indeed.

140.

This one. Listen, Mariuccia.
Last night, I...

Patou, 200 liras.

- May I have a shaving soap, please?
- Sure.

Mariuccia...

3.50 liras.

12.

- 3.50.
- He's about to spend a fortune here.

3.50.

- Do you have a car?
- No. Thank you.

CHAUFFEUR skilled mechanic,
good looking, with references,

1,000 liras per month. PO box 465.

CHAUFFEUR skilled mechanic,
good looking, with referencies,

800 liras per month. PO box 465.

CHAUFFEUR skilled mechanic,
good looking, with referencies,

600 liras per month. PO box 465.

DEAR SIR, FEW DAYS AGO,
MY FIAT 525 TORPEDO,

AS A RESULT OF NEGLIGENCE ON THE PART
OF MY CHAUFFEUR, WHO I DISMISSED,

COLLIDED WITH A TROLLEY
AND IT IS STILL UNSERVICEABLE.

IT HAS TO BE REPAIRED.

GO TO MY OFFICE IN MELEGNANO STREET 2.
YOURS FAITHFULLY, ENGINEER A. STACETINI.

WANTED: chauffeur, few requirements.
350 per month. Call 80-667.

It fits you like a glove.

Perfect.

My car is milk-and-coffee-coloured.

And whoever drives my car must wear
a milk-and-coffee-coloured uniform.

How much is it?

- Good afternoon.
- Hello.

- What are you doing here?
- I'm waiting for Gina.

- That's pretty obvious.
- There they are.

Good afternoon, Gina.

- Good afternoon.
- Good afternoon.

- Let's go for a drink?
- Yes.

- Sure, let's go.
- No, thanks. I'm going home.

Always the same. Go on home, then!

Goodbye.

- May I drive you home?
- No, thanks.

At least permit me to ask why you refuse
my kind offer to take you home?

- I'm like that. I'll go on foot.
- Be careful!

- Let's go. Come.
- Since you so kindly insist...

Good. Where to?

- Corso Sempione.
- Please.

Bruno, Corso Sempione.

- Do you mind if I smoke?
- No.

- I smoke too.
- Oh, sorry.

No, leave it to me.

You don't have any errands
to attend to today?

That way we could
spend more time together.

How generous!

We could go on a ride,
like your girlfriends do.

On Sunday, for example.

- Where?
- I don't know... To the Lakes?

Ah, the Lakes.

I've never been there.

- C'mon, sweetie...
- No, leave me alone.

You're tickling me.

- What's the matter?
- It's...

- I've had enough.
- Enough of what?

Of this thing here.

Ah, these servants!
Don't pay attention, miss.

Oh, please.
You should be ashamed!

- Move, move.
- But I can't drive!

Where's your chauffeur?

Listen...
My chauffeur has just resigned.

Are you kidding?
Anyway, I'll have to report you.

- Why did you do that?
- Leave me in peace.

- But it was a joke.
- Yeah, nice one.

- Who knows what you think about me now.
- Me? I think nothing.

A Fernet.

- Do you want one?
- Thanks.

- One more.
- Sure.

I hoped so much to see you
in the perfume shop.

Sure, the way you treated me...

You see...

After that night at the Lakes...

I didn't know...

you had a job.
- Now you know, so leave me alone.

- Why?
- Because...

Girls like you are for rich guys.

- That's how you think I'm like?
- Yes.

Just like that!

May I help you, sir?

- Miss Mariuccia?
- She's not here.

- Good night.
- Good night.

- What do you mean "she's not here"?
- She doesn't work here anymore.

I see...

- Goodbye.
- Goodbye.

- Mr. bicyclist!
- Are you talking to me?

Thanks. Thanks a lot.

Three times faster
than usual ironing.

- Nice.
- Yes, it is.

Everything for 25 liras, madam.

Very good perfume.

Would you like a perfume, madam?

Hey, young man!
There is no wall behind you.

- I'm sorry.
- OK...

- Sweets?
- No, thanks.

For free.

Have some more.

Thanks.

- What's the price?
- Wait a second.

"Special powder...
Perfumed, 5 liras."

"No perfume, 3 liras and..."

- Good evening, miss.
- Good evening.

What a coincidence, huh?

You found me!
Have you been looking for me?

Me? No.

I was just passing by.

I see...

- Good evening, madam.
- Good evening.

Isn't that guy over there
ever going to move?

- Madam is here!
- What does it matter?

I put on some perfume...

- I went to the perfumery tonight.
- So they told you?

That you had left.

I was afraid you were angry at me.

You were so unkind.

May I?

- Did you find a job?
- A job? No.

I don't worry about that.

- I have plenty of offers.
- Come on, Mariuccia. Enough.

Good night.

- Will you come back?
- Yes, tomorrow.

Goodbye.

No perfume left after him!

What times we live in!

Restaurant of the Nations, an elegant
meeting place at the Milan Fair.

Please go to the restaurant Milan,
of the Ferrario Brothers,

behind the pavilion of the Radio,
next to the amusement park.

- Ah, poor thing!
- It's all my fault.

All my fault!

Hey! Hey!

Gina! They might find him a job.

- Hello, Miss Gina.
- Good afternoon.

- Mariuccia.. Engineer Leali.
- Pleased to meet you.

- And Mr...
- Pozzi.

- A cognac?
- Yes.

Five cognacs, please.

- How's work going?
- Not bad. The place is swarming.

- Is it?
- Miss Mariuccia...

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Here you go, Gina.

- Engineer...
- Thanks.

Mr. Pozzi...

- Cheers!
- Cheers!

You never smile, miss?

Poor girl...
One of her relatives is out of work.

And you, engineer, should find him
a job here, at the fair. You can do it.

- He's a mechanic.
- A good one.

- Where's he?
- Look, that one there.

- Listen, Pozzi...
- Yes, engineer.

- See that young man there?
- That one? Yes.

- Find some work for him to do.
- Understood.

- Thank you, sir.
- Don't mention it, darling.

Thanks to Gina...

Mariuccia, it's late. We have to go.

- Goodbye, miss.
- Goodbye.

- Thanks, Gina.
- Not at all.

He'll be so happy!

Good afternoon.

Good afternoon.

Sweets?

Thanks.

Good afternoon.

- Good afternoon, Miss Mariuccia.
- Good afternoon.

- They need me here at the fair.
- Are you happy?

They insisted so much.
Maybe I'll accept the job.

- I'll accept it just to be near you.
- Near who?

Near you.

You see, Miss Mariuccia...
I've never told you...

Maybe I have a rotten temper, but...

- Sorry, miss. How does it work?
- Works like this.

- What a temper!
- Go elsewhere, please.

I realized you are not
like other girls.

You are a good girl.
Am I right, Mariuccia?

Well...

- I have to go back to work.
- And try not to lose it this time!

- Bye.
- Have a nice day.

No!

As you can see, gentlemen,

today, the same stream intensity
needed to operate a doorbell,

the electric doorbell each of you
have in your own home,

is enough to activate
any of these pumps.

Please, look. This is just amazing!

One.

Two.

Please.

Please, come here, madam.
Have a try yourself.

See yourself.

One.

Two.

Wonderful!

Even a foreign girl,
who doesn't speak our language,

can easily operate this machine.

- For you, miss.
- Thanks.

DEAR GINA, I WILL PICK YOU UP
AT 11 PM TONIGHT.

AS YOU KNOW, THE ENGINEER FOUND
A JOB FOR MARIUCCIA'S RELATIVE.

THE ENGINEER IS COMING WITH US.
MAKE SURE MARIUCCIA IS COMING TOO.

A KISS FROM YOUR MARIO.

I'm not going. I can't.

You're impossible!

What are you afraid of?
Are they going to eat you?

You need people like them in life.
Not guys like your sweetheart.

If you don't come with us,
they can fire him.

Enough now! Please work!

The same stream intensity enough
to operate a small electric doorbell,

comfortably sitting at your desk,

no need to get up...

We've proved the functionality
and the usefulness of our pump.

Please.

If I had to talk about the possibilities
in the field of irrigation,

I would have so much
to tell you about. And...

Closing now!

That would be all for tonight.
We'll speak again tomorrow.

Advance?

- Tomorrow at 8 am sharp.
- Don't worry.

Good night.

She's not here.

Right.

She went home.

- Good night.
- No. She did not go home.

She went with some gentlemen.

They are at the amusement park.

What's more...

Good night.

Come on, that kind of girl
is not for you.

There you need a car...

and a big stack of cash.

Let's go have a drink?

Why?

- Bad taste in your mouth?
- Me?

- You think that I, for that girl...
- Yes, I think you would...

- Did you know that you're pretty?
- You realize it only now?

Hands off!

Rude man!

Who knows where you are taking me?

ROLLERCOASTER

One more round!

Another round?

Yes, fine.

- Let's go for a drive.
- Yes, let's go.

Excuse me.

Idiot!

One more round!

Go, go now.

He's got a nerve! Let's go.

How lovely...

Look who's here.

- Hello, dear.
- How is it going?

- My friend, Mariuccia.
- Pleased to meet you.

Isn't she lovely?

Are you at the fair too?

- Champagne?
- Yes, this one.

Two cups of coffee.

- So nice here, isn't it?
- Yes. And also, this year

there are some interesting
presentations...

Shall we dance?

Let's dance. You too, miss.

- No, thank you.
- Come on, dance!

- Miss...
- Thanks.

Drink, Mariuccia!

Shall we dance?

- Another dance?
- No, thanks.

But, Bruno...

- Forgive me, sir.
- Please.

Listen...

Shall we go now?

I live far away.
We shall not miss the last tram.

Yes.

Bruno...

- What do you want?
- Come on!

You'd better go now.

They're waiting for you.

And you have to be kind with them
to get where you want.

Go, drive!

Bruno!

Crocodile tears.

All you women are the same!

Why did you go with such people?

Why?

What a fool I am.

Mariuccia...

Mariuccia, let's get married!

You know how much I love you.

No more perfumery, OK?

You'll be staying at home...

cooking risotto!

What is he doing? Why did he stop?

Let's go, Mariuccia.
You're back home.

- Dad...
- Get out.

Let's go, young man.

Get out!

- I'm a good guy.
- Yes, he is.

Be quiet!

But I am a good guy.

Are you coming or not?

Giovanni, three Stregas.

- Three liras?
- Yes.

Cheers.

Damn!

- Hey! Are we going?
- Let's go.

Work is calling.

Come with me.

Would you mind waiting a moment?

- Bye, Mariuccia.
- Good night, dad.

Nice...

- Good night, Mariuccia.
- Good night, Bruno.

- Good night.
- Good night.

Enough now.

Excuse me...

- Do you mind?
- Not at all.

- He's my son-in-law.
- Manzoni Street.

THE END