West Coast (2016) - full transcript

‪- What's up, Grandma?‬
‪- Nothing.‬

‪- Erwan?‬
‪- Yo, nigga?‬

‪Your uncle's coming tomorrow.‬

‪Ok.‬

‪Later, Chewbacca.‬

‪Hurry Malo, we're late.‬

‪What're you doing?‬

‪Shit!‬

‪Some T-shirt.‬

‪From your mom's boyfriend, I suppose?‬

‪Dad!‬
‪Menace loaned it to me.‬



‪It's pretty cool.‬

‪Totally fresh and fly!‬

‪- Isn't that it?‬
‪- Sure.‬

‪You'll ride it one day, kiddo.‬

‪Too dangerous now.‬

‪Takes a special license.‬

‪It blows being your brother.‬

‎Keep us in mind
‎Drive kind

‪Dad, stop.‬

‪Why?‬

‪They'll see you.‬

‪- It's the last day. Can't I?‬
‪- No.‬

‪See you right after school?‬

‪Dad, let me chill.‬



‪Call me at least!‬

‪Ok... maybe. I'll see.‬

‪Catch the bad guys.‬

‪You too, thanks.‬

‪Have a nice chill.‬

‪Be good.‬

‪Let's go, kids.‬

‪C'mon!‬

‪Off the bus.‬

‪"Off the bus please, sir."‬

‪Off the bus please, sir.‬

‪Go on.‬

‪Hey, bros.‬

‪- Too sly!‬
‪- You nailed it.‬

‪- What happened?‬
‪- West Side!‬

‪Menace showed her.‬

‪Who? Tell me.‬

‪- That bus driver bitch.‬
‪- She's so rude.‬

‪What a tool.‬

‪He looked her right in the retina.‬

‪Like, 10 minutes.‬
‪She pissed in her miniskirt, the biatch!‬

‪I just reminded her who we are.‬

‪Serial Killer!‬

‪Next time I'll shut her up for good.‬

‪West Side!‬

‪Listen, Menace.‬
‪Crazy thing happened to me too.‬

‪This dude was into my bike...‬

‪Fuck...‬

‪Only 2 more months.‬

‪Yeah, high school chicks are hot.‬
‪Goodbye, farm girls!‬

‪We'll be scorin'...‬

‪like...‬

‪total fags.‬

‪Guys?‬

‪Think it'll be easier in Lorient‬

‪to get girls?‬

‪You got your internet girl.‬

‪She's special.‬
‪I meant sex.‬

‪Right, sorry.‬

‪Dude, they'll see we're gangstas.‬

‪They'll go ape.‬

‪We're so gonna get laid!‬

‪You like that, bitch?‬

‪Delete's your man!‬
‪Take it, eat it, hoe!‬

‪Get lost, creepy girls.‬

‪Let it go, nigga.‬
‪They stink of death.‬

‪Guys, you'll never guess!‬

‪Crazy shit!‬

‪- The gym teacher hit on me.‬
‪- The whore!‬

‪He's full of shit.‬

‪Shut up.‬
‪Check it out.‬

‪Showing me her boobs!‬

‪Totally.‬

‪She picked up a ball.‬

‪Shut up!‬

‪You're jealous.‬

‪As if!‬

‪Hey, Loic!‬

‪Let's go.‬

‪I'll have to bone her!‬
‪Serial Killer!‬

‪- Yeah, nigga!‬
‪- Thug life!‬

‪She's butt ugly anyway.‬

‪Yo?‬

‪Coming!‬

‪Just a second, guys.‬
‪Go on, go.‬

‪Laetitia?‬

‪Can I ask you something?‬

‪- You won't laugh?‬
‪- No, promise.‬

‪Does your dad work for Microsoft?‬

‪I like your Xbox!‬

‪Just teasing.‬

‪I'm having a party later.‬

‪- Wanna come?‬
‪- Sure. Just a sec.‬

‪So close.‬

‪Hi, Malo. What's up?‬

‪Leaving for break?‬

‪Yeah, no...‬
‪I'm around next week.‬

‪Then I'll be with my mom.‬

‪I'm sticking around.‬

‪Wanna hang out?‬

‪Totally.‬

‪Call me, ok?‬

‪Totally.‬

‪Cool.‬

‪Excuse me, I gotta go.‬

‪Chill, biatch.‬

‪Yeah, nigga!‬
‪You rock, dude!‬

‪Let's hear it.‬

‪I nailed it.‬
‪I called her biatch.‬

‪Bet she loved that.‬

‪C'mon kids, hurry up.‬

‪I've got a surprise.‬
‪Gonna be ace!‬

‪Go on, I'll catch up.‬

‪Grandma told me‬
‪you're coming tomorrow.‬

‪Why, though?‬

‪No, tell me now.‬

‪What?‬

‪I take good care of Grandma.‬

‪What the fuck‬
‪will I do in Alsace?‬

‪Ok, bye.‬

‪"With my rocker heart‬

‪I never could say I love you‬

‪But Mom, I loved you‬

‪Like nobody else ever did‬

‪I was still just‬

‪a teenager‬

‪Living the life of an outsider..."‬

‎Dreamt of u
‎Woke up wet

‎Wanna meet

‎FOR REAL??!!

‎Your place, biatch!
‎U gonna COME!!!

‪Brieuc!‬

‪No interest in music?‬

‪Yes.‬

‪It's about a rebel,‬
‪you can relate.‬

‪Come up here.‬

‪Knock 'em dead.‬

‪I'll beatbox for you.‬

‪Sing it on your own.‬

‪Everything ok with you?‬

‪Perfect.‬

‪"With my rocker heart‬

‪I never could say I love you..."‬

‪For Laetitia.‬

‪Take it.‬

‪Pass it.‬

‪Are you retarded?‬

‪Pass it, asshole!‬

‪Be polite, young man.‬

‪Respect my bro, muthafucka!‬

‪Erwan, that's not nice.‬

‪"Respect my bro, muthafucka!"‬

‪- It's not funny!‬
‪- Chill.‬

‪Don't make fun of Bieber.‬

‪Erwan, please sit down.‬

‪Know what SWAG means?‬

‪Secretly We Are Gay.‬
‪You're fags.‬

‪Know what?‬
‪We'll fuck you up.‬

‪Asshole.‬

‪Who do you think you are?‬

‪Fags!‬

‪Clowns!‬

‪Stop it!‬

‪Assholes!‬

‪Buttfucker!‬

‪You're pathetic.‬

‪Fucking stop it!‬

‪I'll waste every one of you!‬

‪I'll fuck him up.‬

‪The bastard!‬

‪Fuckin' snob.‬

‎B there in 2hrs slut...
‎B afraid biatch!

‪We'll show him who's boss.‬

‪Am I right?‬

‪Totally.‬
‪Nobody messes with our posse.‬

‪Yo, niggas. Whassup?‬

‪I know.‬
‪We'll crash his stupid party.‬

‪Humiliate him at home.‬

‪- What?‬
‪- His place.‬

‪I can't go, guys.‬

‪We'll bring him to his knees.‬

‪He'll beg forgiveness.‬

‪Respect, nigga.‬
‪Serial Killer!‬

‪Hang on.‬

‪There's gonna be tons of them.‬

‪You're such a weak link.‬

‪Delete's right.‬

‪- See?‬
‪- We need something.‬

‪A gun.‬

‪Not my dad, please.‬

‪Meet at your house.‬

‪That's the shit! You rule!‬

‪So what went down?‬

‪- Hi there.‬
‪- Gotta go.‬

‪Bye.‬

‪Hi.‬

‪- Was that Mom?‬
‪- Yeah.‬

‪You're in PJs.‬
‪Our bike ride?‬

‪Sorry, I think I'm getting sick.‬

‪Shall I call the doc?‬

‪No, I just need some rest.‬

‪So, is your mom doing alright?‬

‪Yeah, sure.‬

‪Are you?‬

‪Grandma, I'm going out.‬

‪Yo Chewbacca,‬
‪what're you doing?‬

‪Tidying up for your uncle.‬

‪You're sweet, Grandma.‬

‪So are you, dear.‬

‎The Tour de France is...

‪- Nailed it.‬
‪- Wait.‬

‪Check it out!‬

‪- Shit!‬
‪- I'm on it.‬

‪- Your dad!‬
‪- What's he doing?‬

‪Your dad!‬

‪Feeling better?‬

‪Hide, dude!‬

‪Not really.‬
‪Just getting some air.‬

‪He blew it again.‬

‪Don't move!‬

‪Get some rest.‬

‪Fuck!‬

‪What'd you do?‬

‪What?‬

‪Dude, you got a problem!‬

‪Admit it, it turns you on!‬

‪Clown!‬

‪Serial Killer!‬

‪Wait for me, guys!‬

‪West Side!‬

‪- Gimme, nigga!‬
‪- I rule.‬

‪Magnum, nigga!‬

‪Hey, guys...‬

‪Sig Sauer 9mm.‬

‪That fag'll shit himself.‬

‪Gimme a little credit.‬

‪Let's do it.‬

‪There's a problem.‬

‪What is it?‬

‪You're wearin' PJs.‬

‪Fag!‬

‪It's Iceman, a collector's item.‬

‪I'll loan you some duds.‬

‪Don't leave me with this nerd!‬

‪No time!‬
‪We gotta go to Sylvain's now.‬

‪Move it.‬

‪This is so uncool.‬

‪Gimme it, c'mon.‬

‪- Here.‬
‪- You're nuts.‬

‪- Can I have it?‬
‪- It's loaded.‬

‪Chill, I know guns.‬

‪Give it back.‬

‪Can I try?‬

‪Kiss your family goodbye!‬

‪That's not how it's done.‬

‪Show me.‬

‪It's not a toy, guys.‬

‪Help me, dude!‬

‪Let him have his fun.‬

‪Tupac style.‬

‪Nice!‬

‪- Do something!‬
‪- Chill.‬

‪Snoop Dogg style.‬

‪You rock.‬

‪Cut it out.‬

‪Fifty Cent style...‬

‪- Sweet.‬
‪- Thanks, nigga.‬

‪Stop it, Delete.‬

‪Delete style...‬

‪Fuck, no!‬

‪- What'd you do?‬
‪- Wasn't me!‬

‪I got you, loser!‬

‪- Asshole!‬
‪- Are you insane?‬

‪Look guys, look!‬

‪Shit.‬

‪Guys, wait up!‬

‪Serial Killer!‬

‪Guys...‬

‪wait up!‬

‪Guys, please!‬

‪Ok, kid...‬

‪I'm not mad at you‬
‪for shooting at me, ok?‬

‪On the contrary.‬

‪It was kinda cool.‬

‪It was a pebble.‬

‪What?‬

‪A pebble.‬

‪Delete!‬

‪Up here!‬

‪Delete, c'mon!‬

‪Move your ass!‬

‪Hide, dude!‬

‪Good job, dude.‬

‪Thanks.‬

‪It wasn't hard.‬

‪Give us the gun.‬

‪Can I keep it a while?‬

‪- No, give it.‬
‪- No.‬

‪Why not?‬

‪I gave it away.‬

‪- Funny.‬
‪- You're hilarious.‬

‪- Where is it?‬
‪- Seriously.‬

‪I gave it to him to make amends.‬

‪Are you kidding?‬

‪I don't believe you.‬

‪What a douche.‬

‪No worries, nigga.‬

‪I know where he's going.‬

‪That lighthouse is in Quiberon.‬

‪Yeah, so?‬

‪So he's going to Quiberon.‬

‪Huh? What?‬

‪I got his license plate.‬
‪We're saved.‬

‪I'm dead.‬

‪Bitch!‬

‪Fuck...‬

‪Niggas, fuck the gun.‬
‪Let's hit the party.‬

‪We'll never get a ride.‬
‪Let's go home.‬

‪We'll kick his ass.‬

‪You hold him‬
‪and I'll kick him.‬

‪We lost the gun.‬
‪This is serious.‬

‪We gotta find it.‬

‪First Quiberon,‬
‪then the fag.‬

‪Thug life, dog?‬

‪Serial Killer.‬

‪We gotta split up.‬

‪That's what I'm saying.‬

‪Me and Copkiller.‬
‪You and your bro. Don't lose him.‬

‪- No way!‬
‪- C'mon.‬

‪I got somethin' to do.‬
‪Go home.‬

‪What?‬

‪You're scared.‬
‪Scared to get beat up.‬

‪That's not it.‬

‪Sure it is.‬

‪You're chicken.‬
‪Fuck this shit!‬

‪You're a biatch‬
‪in badass clothes.‬

‪No I'm not.‬

‪I'm ashamed to be your brother.‬

‪I got a date with a girl.‬

‪- To fuck her.‬
‪- What?‬

‪You can't find your dick.‬

‪Seriously, look.‬

‪What's this shit?‬

‪Get lost then.‬

‪Go home, swear?‬

‪Make an effort.‬

‪What for?‬

‪We'll find the gun.‬

‪Trust me.‬

‪Call on your Chi.‬

‪Cut the Chinese crap.‬

‪Remember Bodhidharma‬
‪and Kung Fu?‬

‪Yeah.‬

‪He got stuck in a cave‬
‪during the coldest winter.‬

‪Mister Freeze stalactites‬
‪everywhere, man!‬

‪- Dude was pissin' popsicles.‬
‪- I get it.‬

‪His monk friends forgot all about him.‬

‪One day one of 'em was like,‬
‪where is he?‬

‪They thought he was dead.‬
‪Know how they found him?‬

‪No, how?‬

‪In great shape!‬

‪Naked, kissing a tree,‬
‪the snow melting around him.‬

‪Psycho, right?‬

‪What's your point?‬

‪Just gotta believe.‬

‪Give me a break.‬

‪A lighthouse sticker‬
‪means he's going to Quiberon?‬

‪If you don't trust me,‬
‪I'll go alone.‬

‪Sorry, you're right.‬

‪I'll kiss a tree‬
‪and a car will stop.‬

‪I'm going to Quiberon.‬
‪Need a ride?‬

‪Comin'?‬

‪Just luck.‬

‪Shit!‬

‪What about Quiberon?‬

‪Keep cool, fool.‬
‪Just a detour, manure.‬

‪Can I borrow your Iceman T-shirt?‬

‪- If you take us to Quiberon.‬
‪- No prob, dude.‬

‪Biatch, where's the fag who lives here?‬

‪- I think he's...‬
‪- You don't know.‬

‪Your bitch is too fat!‬

‪What's he doing?‬
‪He said 5 minutes.‬

‪He's a Rasta, dude.‬

‪So?‬

‪They have‬
‪a different concept of time.‬

‪Hang on.‬

‪Shit, my dad!‬

‪What do I do?‬

‪Hurry up!‬

‪- Let it ring.‬
‪- What?‬

‪- Don't hang up.‬
‪- What?‬

‪Fuck, no!‬

‎Copkiller here, have no fear

‎Tell me what I wanna hear!

‪Malo, I take it you're feeling better.‬

‪Could you call me, please?‬

‪I'm just a tad worried.‬

‪Fuck, I'm dead.‬

‪- What?‬
‪- He knows I snuck out.‬

‪You jerk!‬
‪I thought it was the gun.‬

‪I'm a jerk?‬

‪- You made me lose his gun.‬
‪- How so?‬

‪I didn't care what Sylvain said.‬

‪Why'd you get so mad?‬

‪This morning my uncle called...‬

‪I don't give a shit!‬

‪Why do I listen to you?‬

‪No one's forcing you.‬

‪Just stay in your boring life.‬

‪What?‬

‪"I'm a good student,‬
‪I make my dad proud."‬

‪Look at you.‬
‪Think you're a gangster?‬

‪Nobody's scared.‬

‪The others are right.‬

‪You're a loser.‬

‪Retard!‬

‪Menace!‬

‪Come back! Sorry!‬

‪Can't wait‬
‪to be away from you.‬

‪I didn't mean it,‬
‪I was upset.‬

‪I don't care!‬

‪You'll miss me‬
‪when I'm gone.‬

‪I can't find the gun‬
‪without you.‬

‪So you need me?‬

‪Yeah. I'm sorry.‬

‪I'll find it, then we're done.‬

‪Shit.‬

‎Beefcake,
‎Amber is yours in 5 minutes

‪You guys lost or what?‬

‪Yo dogs, whassup?‬

‪What'd you say?‬

‪Actually,‬

‪this guy was supposed‬
‪to take us to Quiberon.‬

‪But don't worry.‬

‪The heat's on us too,‬
‪we won't snitch.‬

‪Snitch about what?‬

‪Shut up.‬

‪Know Barf and Belch?‬

‪Guilty!‬

‪Get outta town, Goulven!‬

‪Gonna drop 'em off?‬

‪No stress, man.‬

‪When I finish this‬
‪we're off to Zion.‬

‪What's Zion?‬

‪Ok, kids.‬

‪Go sit over there.‬

‪"Go sit over there."‬

‪While he finishes.‬

‪Hello.‬

‪Civilian clothes suit you.‬

‪Malo ran away.‬

‪Shit.‬

‪Is he here by any chance?‬

‪I don't know.‬

‪Well, could you check?‬

‪Loic, Brieuc? You there?‬

‪Hello.‬

‪Hello, sir.‬

‪The latest‬
‪"Battle of Wakfu Kingdom Fire."‬

‪Know it?‬

‪No, you don't.‬

‪Malo's not here.‬

‪Nor are our kids.‬

‪There you go. Sorry.‬

‪What do you mean?‬

‪- Wanna play?‬
‪- Where are your kids?‬

‪No idea.‬

‪Me neither.‬

‪When'll they be home?‬

‪No idea at all.‬

‪They do whatever they like?‬

‪Usually I'm in charge.‬

‪Those little rascals are naughty!‬

‪I'm not happy.‬

‪I'll give them a good talking to!‬

‪Bad news for them.‬

‪Do they have a phone?‬

‪- Sure.‬
‪- Like everyone.‬

‪We bought one.‬

‪Right.‬

‪Yeah, what?‬

‪You tell me, big boy!‬

‎Big boy?

‎What's with you?

‪Hey, now!‬

‪That's better.‬

‪- That's better!‬
‪- Where are they?‬

‪Where are you?‬

‎I'm at a party,
‎Virgin's on a ride.

‪Good luck.‬

‪You're punished, pumpkin!‬

‎Like it or not.

‎So...

‎How's the party?

‎Having fun I hope?
‎Are they nice?

‪Gotta go, I'm on a mission.‬

‎Ok, but don't be late.

‪- Shut your trap.‬
‎- What?

‪C'mon, dammit!‬

‪Fuck, so uncool.‬

‪Amber! It doesn't matter.‬

‪Florence, please!‬

‪Giving me the silent treatment?‬

‪Excuse me, man.‬

‪- What?‬
‪- Are we going?‬

‪Yeah.‬

‪What're you doing?‬

‪Gotta finish it.‬

‪Gimme some.‬

‪If I finish the candy vodka,‬

‪will you french me?‬

‪I don't think so.‬

‪JB, get some booze‬
‪at the restaurant.‬

‪Ok, but tell your little friends‬
‪to go easy.‬

‪Gotcha.‬

‪Get lost, dude!‬

‪Hey, Ricky Martin!‬

‪Messed with my posse?‬

‪You dirty little ho!‬

‪What?‬

‪- Talkin' to me?‬
‪- Yeah, ho!‬

‪What's wrong with you?‬

‪Fuck...‬

‪Scare you, Machine?‬

‪The name's Sabine.‬

‪Ok, cool.‬

‪You ok?‬

‪Not really.‬

‪Like my make-up?‬

‪Uh... yeah.‬

‪- Really?‬
‪- Yeah, a lot.‬

‪Cool.‬

‪What'd you say?‬

‪- What?‬
‪- You said something.‬

‪I don't think so.‬

‪Sorry.‬

‪I get it.‬

‪What?‬

‪I coughed, so...‬

‪- maybe you...‬
‪- Cool.‬

‪Take this off.‬

‪Sorry, thought I had.‬

‪Sometimes I forget at home too.‬

‪- What's that?‬
‪- What's what?‬

‪That thing you....‬

‪Shit, sorry!‬

‪Stop apologizing. It's all good.‬

‪You're right, sorry.‬

‪Shit.‬

‪Hey, Amber?‬

‪Yeah?‬

‪I'm gonna spank you,‬

‪you horny little biatch,‬
‪I know you want it.‬

‪Yeah... Beefcake,‬

‪hung like a horse...‬
‪Send me to the shiny moon‬

‪with your velvet rod.‬

‪You're gonna get it. I'm gonna...‬

‪tear your ass up.‬

‪You big slut!‬

‪- What's his problem?‬
‪- Dunno, ask him!‬

‪- Fuck him!‬
‪- I'm thirsty...‬

‪I'm thirsty...‬

‪You're drinking all the ammo!‬

‪- Yeah, stupid!‬
‪- I'm thirsty...‬

‪- Ouch!‬
‪- Sorry.‬

‪I don't call this peace.‬

‪Without team spirit, we die.‬

‪- How'd we win in '98?‬
‪- Dunno, I wasn't born.‬

‪They're here, we lost.‬

‪Don't worry, I'm on it.‬

‪- Just a scratch.‬
‪- You cheat!‬

‪What do we do?‬

‪We jump, men.‬

‪For real?‬

‪C'mon.‬

‪You ok?‬

‪Dunno.‬

‪- Wanna stop?‬
‪- Yes.‬

‪I mean yes, let's do it.‬

‪- You seem upset.‬
‪- It's just...‬

‪I can't see without my glasses.‬

‪Gotta hit the kitchen‬
‪for ammo.‬

‪I wasted Goulven!‬

‪Got my bullet-proof vest!‬

‪You're dead now!‬

‪Fuck him up!‬

‪Son of a bitch.‬

‪Could you move your ass?‬

‪Hey you, off my bike.‬

‪Are you ok?‬

‪Did I hurt you?‬

‪Not yet.‬

‪Bye, kiddo.‬

‪Get off the road,‬
‪it's dangerous.‬

‪Can you drop me off?‬

‪I'm running late,‬

‪my mom might worry.‬

‪Where do you live?‬

‪Quiberon.‬

‪You're lucky.‬

‪I sure am.‬

‎Mean Dog

‪Hellish!‬

‪- What?‬
‪- Gotta go.‬

‪I ditched my brother.‬

‪He'll get raped.‬

‪Little brother? How old?‬

‪Three.‬

‪Really? Better go get him.‬

‪That's what I said.‬
‪Off I go.‬

‪Thanks a lot.‬

‪Brieuc, cut it out.‬

‪- I've got an idea.‬
‪- What?‬

‪We'll take my mom's car.‬

‪Are you sure?‬

‪Enough, guys!‬

‪This isn't a stadium.‬

‪It's Laetitia!‬

‪- Who?‬
‪- Laetitia!‬

‪- Who's she?‬
‪- His girl.‬

‪Got a girl?‬

‪Yeah, I do!‬

‪Leave a message!‬

‪He's got a girl, awesome!‬

‪Hello, Laetitia...‬

‪Just wanted to say‬
‪you're really pretty.‬

‪Super sweet and refined.‬

‪And you're not dumb‬
‪like some fat whore.‬

‪I'll save you from Sylvain's party,‬

‪cuz I love you, Laetitia!‬

‪"Even kids can dream..."‬

‪It's stupid to make fun.‬

‪I didn't call Laetitia.‬
‪I called your house.‬

‪No way. And my dad?‬

‪Right in the ass!‬

‪"Even kids can dream‬

‪Kids can have feelings‬

‪I want him to kiss me on the lips‬

‪Not like a child..."‬

‎Come out of your shell!

‪We'll find him.‬

‪It's ok, I've got my bike.‬

‪No, I won't let you down.‬
‪I'm coming.‬

‪Ok.‬

‪Florence?‬

‪- What?‬
‪- Can I drive?‬

‪Of course... Beefcake.‬

‎Hey, Goulve!

‪Don't leave yet.‬

‪You're the winner.‬

‪My trophies!‬

‪Buck up, dude.‬

‪Go home, Iceman.‬

‪Drive that beater home.‬

‪Right, this is your turf.‬

‪Wait for me!‬

‎Brothers and sisters,
‎old friends, new friends,

‎two by two
‎they share the adventure.

‎Palliative treatment includes sedation

‎to ease the pain.

‪Hot in here, isn't it?‬

‪You said it, it's awful!‬

‪I think I'll have to get naked.‬

‪For real?‬

‪'Course not, kiddo!‬
‪Just joking.‬

‪It's not funny.‬

‎Slam some rhymes
‎on my sex chat line.

‎Serial Killer!

‪- Yeah?‬
‎- Where are you?

‪"Fair are you?"‬

‎Is King Kong there?

‪Who is this?‬

‎Delete. Is my bro with you?

‪No, don't think so.‬

‎Aren't you in Quiberon?

‪Why would we be in Quib...‬

‪How's school?‬

‪Got a girlfriend?‬

‪Not really.‬

‪- No?‬
‪- Girls don't get me.‬

‪Every time I try with one,‬
‪she dumps me.‬

‪They're so lame.‬

‪Girls are weird.‬

‪How do you go about it?‬

‪I call 'em hoes.‬

‪Biatches, y'know.‬

‪So they know I rule,‬
‪I'm top dog.‬

‪Get it?‬

‪Yeah, I get it.‬

‪That's why I prefer girls like you.‬

‪Old girls.‬

‪Can I give you some tips‬
‪about girls, kiddo?‬

‪Sure.‬

‪But don't call me kiddo.‬
‪It bugs me.‬

‪Ok.‬

‪Hello, Alexandra?‬

‪I was just calling to find out if,‬
‪by chance,‬

‪Malo is with you?‬

‪Yeah, you know,‬
‪it's vacation,‬

‪so I let him go out, and now...‬

‪Sure, I'll send you a text‬
‪so I don't bother you.‬

‪Bye, honey.‬

‪Sorry, I mean Alexandra.‬

‪Bye.‬

‪Where the fuck is he?‬

‪What'd you want to tell me?‬

‪What d'you mean?‬

‪The thing about your uncle.‬

‪The thing is...‬

‪What the hell?‬

‪West Side!‬

‪Where'd you get it?‬

‪Hitchhiking didn't pan out.‬

‪- Sweet!‬
‪- Where's your bro?‬

‪Hang on.‬

‪So...‬
‪Stop that, please.‬

‪Stealing was the only option.‬

‪I sent King Kong home.‬

‪- Right.‬
‪- Gimme the keys.‬

‪Stroke of luck,‬

‪I found this car with keys‬

‪and came for you.‬

‪Get in.‬

‪- And your head?‬
‪- Hit the steering wheel.‬

‪Bummer.‬

‪What's this crap?‬

‪- I'll be DJ.‬
‪- Yeah.‬

‪Where's your bro?‬

‪No idea,‬
‪I keep telling you.‬

‪Dude lost his brother!‬

‪Bitches!‬

‪Hey, lil' bro.‬

‪Screening me? That's cool.‬
‪I took your advice.‬

‪I found the posse.‬
‪I got us a car.‬

‪We need you now, bro.‬

‪Hope you're ok.‬
‪Yo, Serial Killer!‬

‪Love you.‬

‪- Weird he's not answering.‬
‪- Yeah.‬

‪- Fuck, it's King Kong!‬
‪- And?‬

‪Freaky shit, man.‬

‪- What?‬
‪- Outta control!‬

‪- Yeah.‬
‪- What happened?‬

‪He's dead, dude.‬

‪What?‬

‪Here, look.‬

‪I scored‬
‪Don't wait 4 me‬

‪Cops at 12 o'clock!‬

‪What?‬

‪I got it under control.‬

‪Sure. You're 15,‬
‪driving a stolen car...‬

‪He has a point.‬

‪Rebel without a cause, dudes.‬

‪Gimme a break.‬

‪Rebel without a cause.‬

‪What the fuck?‬

‪- WTF?‬
‪- Vin Diesel style!‬

‪Too cool!‬

‪Insane, dude. You rule!‬

‪Shit, so uncool.‬

‪Fuck.‬

‪What's wrong?‬

‪- Car's dead.‬
‪- Shit.‬

‪It's ok, we can walk.‬

‪- What?‬
‪- Cool.‬

‪Get out.‬

‪Hey, dudes.‬

‪What's with him?‬

‪Get out.‬

‪C'mon, dude!‬

‪Wait.‬

‪What?‬

‪We can't leave the car here.‬

‪Why not?‬

‪The guy I stole it from‬
‪will never find it.‬

‪Great. Let's go.‬

‪Fuck!‬

‪C'mon, screw the car.‬

‪It's Amber's car.‬

‪What?‬

‪You met the internet babe? When?‬

‪The fag got a real girl!‬

‪She's not really my girl.‬

‪Yo, my nigga!‬

‪Delete popped his cherry!‬

‪- What's she like?‬
‪- You know her.‬

‪If it's Laetitia you're dead.‬

‪The music teacher?‬

‪- As if!‬
‪- No, it's Florence.‬

‪I think I'm in love.‬

‪The goth girl is Amber.‬

‪Are you kidding?‬

‪She's hideous!‬
‪I think I'm gonna puke.‬

‪Why?‬

‪- Gross!‬
‪- Did your mom rape you?‬

‪She must stink of death!‬

‪I don't get it.‬

‪Fuck you fags,‬
‪you stupid bastards!‬

‪I've taken all I can take from you!‬

‪You never listen, I don't exist!‬

‪You make my lil' bro diss me.‬

‪Listen, Delete...‬

‪You're his idol.‬

‪Not me.‬

‪He doesn't like me.‬

‪Listen, dude,‬

‪we're sorry,‬
‪we'll be careful.‬

‪If you like her,‬
‪we like her too.‬

‪Absolutely, bro.‬

‪- Let's take that car back.‬
‪- Thanks.‬

‪So she's cool?‬

‪Totally.‬
‪She's Goth cuz she's shy.‬

‪- It's her shell.‬
‪- Did you fuck?‬

‪I had to rescue you,‬
‪but it would've been amazing.‬

‪Let's give it all we got!‬

‪Shit.‬

‪This is so beyond uncool.‬

‪We'll come back for it.‬

‪I promise.‬

‪It's hard to catch a black cat‬
‪in a dark room.‬

‪Especially when it's in there.‬

‪Hi Fred, how are you?‬

‪Bad, obviously.‬

‪No! You have to go.‬

‪I gotta tell you something.‬

‪What?‬

‪My mom is actually a man.‬

‪My parents are two men.‬

‪How cool! Go on, scram.‬

‪You don't get it.‬

‪I've never seen breasts.‬

‪Can you show me yours?‬

‪It'll happen for you someday,‬

‪I promise.‬

‪It might not.‬

‪Let me talk.‬

‪Sorry, honey.‬

‪Ciao, Piccolo!‬

‪You can't treat a child this way.‬

‪Menace,‬
‪I don't get the black cat thing.‬

‪Chinese proverb.‬

‪Means catching a black cat‬
‪in a dark room is hard.‬

‪If he's in there. Metaphor.‬

‪Right, of course.‬

‪What's it got to do with me?‬

‪No point looking for trouble‬
‪if there is none.‬

‪Asian psychology. Dig?‬

‪But I do have a problem.‬

‪Isn't it: "Hard to catch‬
‪a black cat in a dark room‬

‪if it's not there?"‬

‪No, I don't think so.‬

‪Anyway, who cares.‬

‪If she loves you,‬
‪she'll forgive you.‬

‪- Think so?‬
‪- Totally.‬

‪Cool.‬

‪Hello, Emile.‬

‪Hello.‬

‪Luckily I took a picture.‬
‪Saved you again!‬

‪Great. Now what?‬

‪Dunno.‬

‪We go there.‬

‪No way!‬

‪We get his address at the club.‬

‪You're one lucky dude.‬

‪Then what?‬

‪We find the gun‬
‪and you return it.‬

‪- Back to the future!‬
‪- And the fag?‬

‪I'll get him one day.‬

‪Afraid he's frenching Laetitia?‬

‪"The toad's spit‬
‪never touches the dove."‬

‪That's not Chinese.‬

‪All animal stuff is Chinese.‬

‪Zoophilia, even?‬

‪In Chinese circuses,‬

‪girls get it on with horses‬

‪and small dogs.‬

‪That's all circuses.‬

‪No, Chinese girls are tiny,‬

‪animals can reach them easier.‬

‪Peruvians and Mexicans too.‬

‪What're you doing?‬

‪I'm happy to see you.‬

‪Get out of here,‬
‪I'll be fired.‬

‪Surprise.‬

‪Is that real?‬

‪Totally.‬

‪- Exciting, right?‬
‪- Get that away from me!‬

‪Get out of here.‬

‪You have penis issues.‬

‪As if.‬

‪I don't see the link.‬

‪Hang on... Hang on!‬

‎You got a girl?

‎- Yeah!
‎- Leave a message!

‎He's got a girl!

‎Hello, Laetitia...

‎Just wanted to say
‎you're really pretty.

‎Super sweet and refined.

‎And you're not dumb
‎like some fat whore.

‎I'll save you from Sylvain's party,

‎cuz I love you, Laetitia!

‎I love you!

‎Sorry, we are closed

‪We'll come tomorrow.‬

‪Don't have much choice.‬

‪Where'll we sleep tonight?‬

‪Here, under the stars.‬

‪You're in your PJs.‬

‪Won't your dad worry?‬

‪No, I left him a message.‬

‪Cool.‬

‪Coming?‬

‪One day this guy told me,‬

‪"Kiss a tree, believe,‬
‪and everything works out."‬

‪What a load of bullshit.‬

‪Everything I do goes balls up.‬

‪Hardly.‬

‪We'll see the guy...‬

‪Are you kidding me?‬

‪Your dad's gonna know‬
‪you stole his gun.‬

‪It's over.‬

‪You trusted me‬
‪and I fucked it up.‬

‪The main thing is giving it back.‬

‪He'll be mad...‬

‪You were right.‬

‪I'm a big loser.‬

‪What does that make me?‬

‪If it weren't for you,‬

‪I'd be a good, obedient little boy.‬

‪I didn't tell you...‬

‪My grandma's losing her marbles.‬

‪I can't stay with her.‬

‪I'm moving to my uncle's.‬

‪- What?‬
‪- Why didn't you tell us?‬

‪I tried.‬

‪Shit.‬

‪I'm sorry.‬

‪Alsace! Rough.‬
‪Weird accent.‬

‪Sucks for rap.‬

‪Colmar.‬

‪The Far East, nigga.‬

‪- What was that?‬
‪- Dunno.‬

‪You bastards can't stop me!‬

‪- We're here to help you!‬
‪- Not true.‬

‪This is a prison!‬

‪He's right.‬

‪The fucking nurses‬
‪think they're wardens.‬

‪Stop!‬

‪Why should I play scrabble all day?‬

‪Just waiting to die?‬

‪- What're you doing?‬
‪- Pooping.‬

‪Go to the toilet!‬

‪Here, cutie.‬

‪- What?‬
‪- Cover me.‬

‪I'll get the car.‬

‪Ok. Awesome!‬

‪Don't panic.‬

‪Gilda?‬

‪Come help me.‬

‪No! Look, guys.‬

‪Serial!‬

‪Killer!‬

‪- I'm so happy!‬
‪- Me too, bro.‬

‪You got the gun! Give it here.‬

‪You're a star, dude!‬

‪Why are you here?‬

‪Come meet my girl.‬

‪I swear she was here.‬

‪Sure.‬

‪Shit, the cops.‬

‪- Think it's my dad?‬
‪- No, relax.‬

‪Let's move!‬

‪Hasta la vista, baby!‬

‪Shit!‬

‪That way!‬

‪Hide the gun.‬
‪Cut the light.‬

‪Fuck.‬

‪This way.‬

‪Go for it!‬

‪- Hurry!‬
‪- Help me.‬

‪Get up there!‬

‪"How handsome you are‬

‪My lovely blond angel‬

‪My loving lips‬

‪At the touch of your skin‬

‪Faint dead away..."‬

‪Fucking hell!‬

‪What's going on?‬

‪Evening, ma'am.‬

‪Get out!‬

‪Get going.‬

‪What are you doing?‬

‪Get out!‬

‪Everything alright, ma'am?‬

‪Step back!‬

‪They're up there!‬

‪There must be a ladder‬
‪or something.‬

‪Gimme a boost.‬

‪Let's go.‬

‪- Anything?‬
‪- No luck.‬

‪- You?‬
‪- Nada, dude.‬

‪Shit!‬

‪Hurry up.‬

‪Cops everywhere!‬

‪Fuck!‬

‪You ok?‬

‪Fuck this shit.‬

‪- Take this!‬
‪- What for?‬

‪Block their path.‬

‪- What do we do?‬
‪- Dunno!‬

‪We're fucked.‬

‪Hang on, guys.‬

‪We won't get caught.‬

‪What?‬

‪Check it out.‬

‪What do we do?‬

‪We jump, men.‬

‪Forget it, dude.‬

‪You're nuts.‬

‪No.‬

‪Yes, dude.‬

‪Cocoon!‬

‪Look at him go!‬

‪What now, guys?‬

‪Look!‬

‪Crazy.‬

‪Careful, dude.‬

‪We got 'em good!‬

‪Left, turn left!‬

‪If you do,‬
‪I'll never be bad again.‬

‪Hey guys, know what?‬

‪We're going home.‬

‪Seriously?‬

‪- Awesome.‬
‪- Can't wait.‬

‪So cool!‬

‪So much booze!‬

‪- Shall we?‬
‪- Big time.‬

‪- Thanks.‬
‪- Awesome.‬

‪Dude,‬

‪that jump in the pool was whack.‬

‪Sure was.‬

‪You aced it. Respect.‬

‪Thanks, guys.‬

‪Want some?‬

‪You bet.‬

‪Respect, nigga.‬
‪Proud to be your bro.‬

‪Thanks, brother.‬

‪The booze is here.‬

‪Get a load of this!‬

‪These guys take party crashing‬
‪to a whole new level!‬

‪Pure genius.‬

‪Must've been your idea.‬

‪I'm impressed.‬

‪Come help me.‬

‪Off my property, dickface.‬

‪On your knees, asshole!‬

‪My friend's no dickface.‬

‪Your toy doesn't scare me.‬

‪Get on your knees and apologize.‬

‪Stop, it's pointless.‬

‪Leave it.‬

‪Do it now!‬

‪Got shit for brains?‬
‪Get down!‬

‪Apologize.‬

‪Apologize, dammit!‬

‪Do it!‬

‪Don't you get it?‬

‪Apologize.‬

‪Malo!‬

‪Lower the gun, Malo.‬

‪Malo, please.‬

‪Do what your dad says.‬

‪Malo, lower the gun.‬

‪You son of a bitch!‬

‪Thanks for that, dude.‬

‪You're welcome.‬

‪Come on out.‬

‪Thanks.‬

‪Wait here.‬

‪Go sit down.‬

‪You're coming with me.‬

‪What can I say?‬
‪You know how I feel.‬

‪Excuse me, can I explain?‬

‪I called your mom to reassure her.‬

‪But she's right.‬

‪How so?‬

‪I let you wear what you want,‬
‪use big words I don't understand...‬

‪I'm too nice.‬

‪I tried to be your friend‬
‪but you need a dad.‬

‪I was stupid.‬

‪Promise me you'll never do it again.‬

‪I promise.‬

‪You can go.‬

‪I love you, Dad.‬

‪So?‬

‪- We're free.‬
‪- Dope!‬

‪- Cool.‬
‪- Amazing, dude!‬

‪- How'd you do it?‬
‪- Blamed you.‬

‎Thirsty?

‎Yeah, big time.

‎Cheers.

‎For you!

‪"Even kids can dream‬

‪Even kids have feelings..."‬

‪That was my doing.‬

‪I went to the party‬
‪and saw that ladies' man.‬

‪I filled the bottle with shit.‬

‎Drop dead!

‪- Nice!‬
‪- What's your message?‬

‪Nothing. Spam.‬

‪You ok?‬

‪Yeah, don't worry.‬

‪See you around.‬

‪Let's blow this hick town.‬

‪Go to the real West Coast.‬

‪Great idea.‬

‪California, niggas!‬

‪Weed and lowriders for days!‬

‪Don't be dumb.‬

‪We'll buy real Timberlands.‬

‪I'll bone a biatch a day,‬
‪minimum!‬

‪We leave Monday at sunrise?‬

‪The Bretons are coming!‬

‪West Side!‬

‪Bye, guys.‬

‪Menace?‬

‪We did prison time.‬

‪We're real gangstas.‬

‪So what happened to you guys?‬

‪We were with these crazy dealers.‬

‪Freaky dudes, man.‬

‪No way, you lie.‬

‪- You smoked pot?‬
‪- Big time.‬

‪You bastards! And?‬

‪- Amazing. Can't remember a thing.‬
‪- Too bad.‬

‪How was the old folks' home?‬

‪Insane.‬
‪You'll never believe me.‬

‪How'd you find the gun?‬

‪That's another story.‬

‪When the dude drove off,‬
‪I spied a fingernail on the road.‬

‪- No way.‬
‪- Way!‬

‪- So I called the lab.‬
‪- The Russians?‬

‪Exactly.‬
‪Bingo, DNA evidence.‬

‪All I needed‬
‪was a ride to his house.‬

‪That's when‬
‪the nuclear bomb pulled up.‬

‪I had to bone her, natch.‬

‪- Tough job.‬
‪- Dream job, you mean!‬

‪Then things got ugly.‬
‪I had to fight off 20 guys...‬

‪Subtitles by Sionann O'Neill - a.s.i.f.‬