Tonight's the Night (1987) - full transcript

[BAND PLAYING "HEART BE STILL"]

♪ Got my attention
With a flirty look ♪

♪ Snap of a finger
Was how long it took ♪

♪ Gave me your number
On an old matchbook ♪

♪ You stole my heart
Just like a master crook ♪

♪ There could be
Trouble brewing ♪

♪ Might be a power struggle

♪ I'm not here just pursuing

♪ I better keep my cool

♪ Heart be still

♪ Don't give it all away



♪ Heart be still

♪ Don't ever be chained

♪ To that girl

♪ She makes my mind a wreck

♪ Please be still

♪ Don't let her suspect

♪ That she has control

♪ Of my very soul

♪ Till I can let go

♪ Heart be still

♪ Oh, heart be still

MAN: Just trying to be
nice to the ladies.

-I'm leaving.
-Right.

Hey, I like your sweater.



-Hey, bro.
-Hey, Henry.

Do you know who that is?

-You're on TV, man.
-Make sure this guy
gets in a cab.

That's cool, man.
I like that.

♪ I wanna squeeze you, baby
Till you crunch ♪

So, you up to no good?

-One drink.
-Yeah.

♪ I thought it was a trick

♪ Like rabbits from a hat

♪ It happened just like that

♪ Heart be still

♪ Don't give it all away

HENRY: How you doing?

Good, good.

You been busy?

About average for a Thursday.

There's a couple
of nice-looking babes.

♪ That she has control
Of my very soul ♪

Smokers.

Some men like women with vices.

♪ Oh, heart be still

I don't know you.

You would have remembered.

Do you like sports?

If they don't smoke.

How about Chinese food?

[CHUCKLES] What is this, a test?

Yeah, you passed.

Hey, wait, listen.

We had a good time
in Hong Kong, didn't we?

-Yeah.
-So let's keep it going.

I'm tired. I really,
really wanna go home and...

-Me, too.
-It's really late.

We'll go to my place.

I'll make some pasta,
and then we'll go
to sleep early.

-I don't know, Sam.
-Please?

-Come on.
-Okay, okay.

I'm gonna drive my car, though.
I'll follow you.

-It's in the parking lot.
-Great.

-Yeah? Okay.
-Yeah, it'll be great.

Have to leave already?

Yeah, I gotta be up
at 6:00 in the morning.

Hayden.

I'd like for you to stay.

I would love to,

but it's just really
not a good night.

Okay.

I'll call you.

I'm bushed.

Me, too.

-Uh-huh.
-Uh-huh.

-Makes you want
to fly the plane, huh?
-Yeah.

I didn't leave the lights on,
I don't think.

Wait a minute.

I know I didn't leave
the door open.

Stay right here.

[WHISPERS] Stay here.

[MOUTHING]

[GASPS]

[THUNDER RUMBLING]

Oh, God. [EXHALES]

Jackie?

Hi, Sam.

What are you doing here?

Oh, I...

I came by to get
the silver napkin rings

that my mom gave us
for Christmas.

You having a late night
supper party?

No.

But they're mine,
and I'm taking them.

And I... And I don't
deserve the courtesy

of a phone call
before you come over here?

I left messages.
I called you for two days.

[SIGHS]

When are you gonna
let go of this, Jackie?

Let go of it?

We have a daughter
together, Sam.
Or have you forgotten?

And when you don't bother
to call her on her birthday,

I am the one that has
to deal with it!

I just got back tonight.

I work for a living.
Have you forgotten that?

No, you were too busy with
your little stewardesses.

I bet you don't forget
their birthdays, do you?

I'm not...

-I'm not gonna fight
with you, Jackie.
-No?

No. How'd you get in here?

I remember where
you hide your key.

Let me have it.

Let me have my key!

You happy now?

I'll be happy when
you're out of here.

-I'm changing the locks.
-JACKIE: Fine.

-And a new hiding place.
-Great.

And if you come back again,
I'm calling the police.

Just call your daughter,
Sky King.

Tanya?

Where did you go?

Great.

-Hi.
-Hi.

What time is it?

It's about 2:00.

Where have you been?

Working.

I had to cut a piece
for tomorrow.

Then stopped by Henry's,
had a drink.

You shouldn't work so hard.

I'll be right back.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[WHISPERS] Kim.

[IMITATING A POLICE OFFICER]
Rampart, we have
a male Caucasian.

He's approximately
six feet tall. Answers
to the name of Kenny.

Do you wish to
pursue at this time?

Kenny.

-Hi.
-Hi.

Do you have any
interoffice envelopes?

Sure.

Oh, thanks.

Ronnie says you guys
are going to Henry's tonight.

Well, they are, but I'm not.

Why not?

A whole bunch of us
are gonna go. It'll be fun.

I've got a term paper
due Monday.

You have to work
on Friday night?

I don't know. We'll see.

Oh.

Amanda.

He is so cute.

-Kenny?
-Yes?

[SCOFFS] Kenny.

I think we can safely say
that you're in love
with this individual.

Ronnie, you have got
to get him to go to Henry's.

PAMELA: I know, Bill. I heard.

I don't care what Kripke says.

That issue is not going higher
than 17, 17 and a half.

Bill, at that price,

it's not going to split.
There's not a chance.

Right.

Well, I'll see you there, too.

All right. Goodbye.

Morning.

Hello, Ms. Ahlberg.
How are you?

Fine. How are you?

Oh, I'm fine. Thank you.

Did you want something?

I, uh, came across an article.

on the new tax law
in the Harvard Business Review

that I thought was pretty good.

And I know you've been working
on that stuff for a while,

so I made a copy
for you, okay?

Thanks, Kenny.

I'll look at it later.

-[TELEPHONE RINGING]
-Excuse me.

PAMELA: Yeah?

Hi, John.

Talk to you later.

PAMELA: Yeah.

You're right. This afternoon.

What?

[SCOFFS] John, I told...

DONNA: I'm not happy, Hayden.

Why not?

You know what day it is Tuesday?

Hmm, let me guess.

It's your birthday.

I'm gonna be 30 years old,
and this is not
where I wanna be.

How about Rome? Paris?

Hey, you know I'm nuts
about you.

You know what's even better?

You're crazy about me.

I'm crazy.

And we have
a great relationship.

We have fun together,
we respect each other,

we admire each other.

Hayden, if we have such
a great relationship,

why aren't we ever together?

Why are you out every night?

I'm not out every night.

Donna, what do you want?
I mean, what do you need?

I need a future.

No, you need to get married.

I would like
to get married, yeah.

That's what people do
who are in love.

You make it sound like a crime.

I would like to believe
that you're not gonna take off

if things get a little tough.

Right now, I can't even
get mad at you

because that would give you
the excuse you need to bail out.

Oh, so you want me to
make a commitment so
what we could fight?

You know
what I'm talking about.

Hayden, I don't
like myself right now.

You mean a lot to me.

But we can't go on like this.

How do you wanna die, Henry?

-Uh...
-You ever think about it?

In a hotel room

in Las Vegas with mirrors
on the ceiling.

-Singing with the Temptations.
-Yeah?

How about, uh,

hitting a 30-footer...
[GRUNTING]

At the buzzer!

I'm not gonna die.

Yes, you are.

No, not till I have a kid.

Yeah.

So, what's bothering you?

Nothing.

Oh, come on. It's Donna, right?

She's on my case again
about getting married.

So why don't you marry her?

I don't know.

I guess I love her,
but I just can't see myself
married to her.

Well, who can you
see yourself married to?

I wish I knew.

Oh, no, you just like
running around too much.

Henry, if Donna
was right for me,

I wouldn't touch another woman.

Okay, so end it.

Well, I'm just not sure
that she's not right for me.

I know she's not perfect.

Listen, I think Donna's great.

Yeah, well she is.
She's wonderful.

She's bright, she's ambitious,

she's got a great body.

But she's a little short.

[HENRY SNICKERS]

And, you know, she's getting
a little too chummy with
that French vanilla.

Oh, man, you've driven
her to ice cream.

She has absolutely
no interest in sports.

Hey, she'd make a great mother.

[SIGHS] You know
what would be great?

If I could take the best
parts of Donna,

her brains, her warmth,

and then mix them together
with Karen's sense of humor.

-You remember Karen?
-[CHUCKLES]

Yeah, that would be great.

And she should look like Lisa.

[LAUGHS] Lisa was a tramp.

Yeah.

I don't know.

I'm just keeping
my options open,

just in case I do find her.

Yeah, but while you're
keeping your options open,

what happens to Donna?

Please, Henry,
your marriage
lasted seven weeks.

Hey, I made a mistake.
I ended it.

I didn't lie to her.

So Kim said that she and her
friends were coming
to the bar tonight, right?

Yes, Ronnie.
For the third time,
yes, that's what she said.

And she also said that Amanda
was gonna be there, right?

Yes.

Ronnie?

What happened?

What do you mean?
What happened where?

Here.

Notice anything different?

No.

No, thanks, I'm not hungry.

You know, I spent half the night
cleaning this place up.

I mean, what happened?

I guess Tom got home early.

Hi, guys.

Yeah. What is it?

What are you doing?

I'm working.
What's it look like?

Feel like taking a break?

[EXHALES] No, not particularly.

Kenny, I think you need
to take some time off.

I mean, you work too hard
on that thing.

You really do.

Get to the point,
will you, guys?

[CHUCKLES]
We're going out tonight,

and we just thought you might
like to come along with us,

-have some laughs.
-And some sodas.

You guys just want me
to go so I can drive
and you can get blitzed.

Forget it. I know you.

We thought you might say
something like that,

so what we did is we
came up with a little
incentive program for you.

If you do this for us,
we're gonna keep this
house clean for a week.

I mean, we're
talking spotless here.

A week?

You guys can't even
keep it clean for a day.

How are you gonna
do it for a week?

I'm going out of town.

No, you're not.

Look, will you just
come with us?

You might even have some fun.

All right, I'll come.

But I'm not wearing that shirt.

[BOTH SCATTING]

It's calling to you, Kenny.

[CONTINUES SCATTING]

[LAUGHTER]

[BAND PLAYING DANCE MUSIC]

♪ Two days in L.A.

♪ And then I meet you

♪ You got a girlfriend

♪ Who said she'd like
To come, too ♪

♪ After some foreplay

I'm sure of one thing.

Yeah? What's that?

Something special
is gonna happen tonight.

Deep, emotional,

spiritual.

Yeah? I just hope
I don't get depressed.

♪ Right now I ain't got time

♪ I had a hard time
Sleeping on your pillow ♪

♪ Looked underneath it

[LAUGHING]

♪ You got them rated, baby

♪ That's 'cause
you're bonkers ♪

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

I told you after last weekend
you're not welcome in this club.

I got help.
I'm gonna be okay now.

If I let you in,
Tommy, one favor.

While you're here,
you think about what you
wanna be when you grow up.

All right.

♪ I saw you last night

♪ Dining at my mate's home

♪ Stumbling downstairs

♪ Putting your clothes on

♪ You sure could
sell it, honey ♪

♪ You'd rather give it

♪ But if you have some cash

♪ You better stay

♪ Someone will school you
Someone will cool you ♪

♪ Somewhere down the line

♪ Someone will
School you, baby ♪

♪ Someone will cool you

♪ Right now I ain't got time

-Hi.
-Hi. Uh, three beers.

Three beers?

Make that two. Kenny,
what are you gonna have?

I'll have a Roy Rogers, please.

I bet her eyelids
taste like apple sauce.

[CHUCKLES] Her name is Sheila.
She started last weekend.

I think she's going out
with the bartender.

TOM: Too bad.

Look. Kenny, Kenny, Kenny.

RONNIE: Kenny, I mean,
she wants you, Kenny.

I mean, face it.

I mean, if I were you,
I'd just wrap her up
and take her home.

Give it a rest, okay?

I'm just trying to help.

Hi, Kenny. Hi, you guys.

RONNIE: Hi. Hi, Amanda.

Can we join you?

RONNIE: Sure.

♪ Someone will school you
Someone will cool you ♪

♪ Somewhere down the line

♪ Someone will school you, baby Someone will cool you ♪

♪ Right now I ain't got time

♪ Someone will school you, baby Someone will cool you ♪

♪ Right now I ain't got time

[CROWD CHEERING]

BILLY: Thank you. We're
gonna take a little break.

Here's Mackie, my main man,
your favorite DJ and mine.

[CROWD CHEERING]

Every time we talk,
she ends up yelling at me.

We've been split up
for six months
and Jackie's still crazed.

You'd think I divorced her.

Yeah, well, you know,
June and I still fight a lot.

That's how it is
when you've got kids.

You got to keep
seeing each other.

That's what she
was screaming about.

Oh.

It is hot up here,
you all, it is hot.

But it's going to get hotter.

Hotter. Yes, indeed.

A little Martha Reeves
and the Vandellas

with a little Heat Wave.

So, how is Jamie?

I don't know. I never see her.
And I don't know what Jackie
tells her about me.

Okay, I'm depressed now.
Okay, you're depressing me.

Look, I come here to have fun.

All right, you're right.

Look. Look at that
little poodle shake it, okay?

She's changing the
chemical composition
of my entire metabolism.

-Hi.
-Hi.

Do you mind if I join you?

You guys look like
the only adults here.

Uh, no, no, of course.

I was getting tired
of sitting by myself.

I'm Chris.

Chris. Uh, my name's Charlie.
This is Sam.

Sam.

Hello, Chris.

Chris.

Uh, what do you do?

I'm a travel agent.

Travel agent.

Do you come here a lot?

Now and then.

I think it's kind of interesting
to watch the people here.

Like, what do you mean?

Well, you see that table
over there with the blonde
with the long wavy hair?

The pretty one?

It's an interesting dynamic.

She's hitting on the cute guy,
but he's not interested.

And the brunette.

The skinny guy is hitting
on the brunette,
but she's not interested.

[CHUCKLES] That's pretty good.

Is that what you do? You come
here to make fun of people?

I didn't make fun of them.
I think they're interesting.

Well, it sounded kind
of clinical, actually.

I mean, they're young.
They're having fun.

They don't know they look silly.

We probably look silly to them.

I didn't say they looked silly.

Well, uh... Yeah, all right.

I'm sorry
I interrupted you guys.

It was a dumb thing to do.

I'll leave you guys.

-It was nice to meet you, Chris.
-Yeah. Yeah, you, too.

Say, you're a real charmer.
Mr. Smooth Guy.

What the hell's
the matter with you?

You know, it took some guts
for her to sit down here.

I'm in a funny mood, all right?

Funny mood? She liked you.

Didn't you pick up on that?

Charlie, she's old enough
to be my wife.

Okay.

Is there a cover charge?

-Huh? No.
-Cover charge?

Your first time here?

Yeah.

Main bar is right there.

There's another one upstairs.

The dance floor, the band.

Men's room's in the back.

If you run into anything
you can't handle by yourself,
I'm Henry.

Thank you.

-Wasn't that the guy...
-Yeah.

You know, and some
liberated sister who was
dumped ten years ago

is still mad at
every guy she meets.

Either that or, you know,
everyone's going on about
their biological clock.

So who am I? Father Time?

Hey, what do we got here?

-Where?
-Right over here.

Oh.

What do I do?

What do you do?
Get your butt over there.

Come on. She's just a kid.

She's a doll.

Yeah. Why don't you
go on over there?

Go on. Go on.

I would, but she's
looking at you.

SAM: Yeah, she is, isn't she?

CHARLIE: Yep.

SAM: I'll be back.

Don't wait up.

Hi, would you like
some company?

Sure.

Sit down.

I'm Sam.

I'm Steffi.

Hello, Steffi.

Would you like
to sign my petition?

Who are we saving tonight?

The whales or the whole world?

We're trying to get them
to make the dance floor bigger.

Don't you think it's too small?

Yeah, it's much too small.

Do you have a pen?

I think so. Just a second.

Where do you want me
to sign it?

On the paper.

Uh-huh.

Hey... [CLEARS THROAT]

Do you think your friend
would sign it, too?

I don't know.
You want me to ask him?

Yeah, I brought a friend
with me tonight.

She's in the ladies' room.

Maybe we could all
have a drink together.

All right, I'll be right back.

[SIGHS]

We may have a couple
of live ones here.

Yeah? What's the story?

She has a friend
who's in the ladies' room.

CHARLIE: The ladies' room.

SAM: This could be outstanding.

Yeah, yeah.

I don't know.

What if her friend's a,
you know, a fox terrier.

You know what I'm saying?

Hold up a hoop.

-[LAUGHING]
-Come on, you're no
day at the beach.

-Yeah, yeah.
-This was your idea.

Yeah, all right.
I'm coming, I'm coming.

But you may have
to sign something.

Steffi, this is Charlie.

Charlie, this is Steffi.

-Pleased to meet you.
-Hi.

Now, where is the petition?

Here it is.

It's for a larger dance floor.

So Sam says you got
a friend here tonight.

She's kind of shy.

Shy? Yeah.

I'll go find her.

CHARLIE: Good.

I'll be right back.

Don't go away now.

[CHUCKLES]

"Don't go away now?"

Jamie, come on, let's go.

Where are we going?

I've got these two great guys
waiting for us.

They're a little bit older,
but they're cute.

You have two guys for us?

These guys are
distinguished, mature.

And can afford
to buy us dinner.

Steffi, what are you
getting us into?

Come and talk to them.

If you don't want to go along
with it, you don't have to.

-But don't mess it up for me.
-Okay, okay, I'm coming.

I'll talk to them. Wait.

CHARLIE: Vegas, a couple
of quickie weddings.
What do you think?

We just have to be open
to a new experience.

-Here we are.
-Hi.

Sam, Charlie,
this is my friend, Jamie.

Jamie?

Yeah.

What are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

Ooh, you're Jamie's father?

[CHUCKLES] Ew.

Is this what you do now?
You go around to bars,
pick up strangers?

It's none of
your damn business.

What about you?
Is this your new thing?

You come to bars
and pick up girls
half your age?

Make a fool out of yourself?

[CROWD CHEERING]

Welcome to Henry's,
and we're Billy and the Beaters.

And right now we're going
to do a little song for you

that's sort of about
the world of fantasy.

["I GOT MY EYE ON YOU" PLAYING]

♪ Say it, baby
What's your name? ♪

♪ Girl, you got
Such a fine, fine frame ♪

♪ Now I'm not trying
To be bold or rude ♪

♪ But girl
You put me in the mood ♪

♪ I got my eye on you, baby

Just who do you think
you're talking to?

If you came up here
to give me a hard time,
forget it.

I am an adult.

You don't get to do
everything that I get to do!

I don't need
to hear this from you.

You left.

You lost your right
to treat me like a child.

I have that right as long
as I am paying
for your education.

Keep your money.

[SCOFFS]

This is what I told your mother
would happen if she went through
with the divorce.

Oh, please.
Who are you kidding?

You got exactly
what you wanted.

I what?

Freedom.

Your freedom.

Now you don't have to care
about anybody but yourself.

Jamie...

Jamie, when your mother
and I got married,

we made a deal.

I would make the money,

she would take care of our home,
the family and me.

Well, I kept my end
of the bargain.

And then somehow,
she just left and you
don't know why, right?

Well, I'm not just
another barfly
to tell your story to.

I was there, remember?

I happen to know
that your wife started
her business from scratch

and you couldn't handle
how well she did.

I encouraged her.

Yeah, when you figured out
how much easier it was
to leave her when she was busy.

You were always leaving.

You know, your family
tried pretty damn hard

to pin you down just
to talk to you.

To try to make it right.

And the bottom line is that
you didn't care enough
to even try.

No, that's not true.

You've got it all wrong, Jamie.

What do I have wrong?
Just tell me one thing
I have wrong.

Boy, you just turned out
to be just as...

as bitter and unreasonable
as your mother did.

[CROWD CHEERING]

Bonnie, you like sports?

No, but I like Chinese food.

You've heard of me, huh?

Yeah.

You're that guy who makes
all that money just for giving
scores and interviewing hunks.

I interviewed
Reggie Jackson last week.

He's one of Michael Jackson's
brothers, right?

I gotta talk
to my brother, Henry.

Will you excuse me?

Boy.

So what was wrong with her?

She looked pretty
good from here.

Physics.

No rocket scientist, huh?

I'm looking for something
special, Henry.

[CHUCKLES] That's right.

I forgot. You're on a mission.

Yeah, go ahead and laugh.
I probably deserve it.

This isn't the place, Hayden.

You come here to have fun,
that's all.

Yeah, well, where do I look?

What, am I supposed to spend
the rest of my life alone?

HENRY: Ooh, alone.

♪ I can take care of myself

♪ I don't need
Nobody's advice ♪

♪ You're so nice

Who is that?

HENRY: Who?

The brunette
with the green eyes.

Green eyes?

She's been in here before.
I don't know her.

That's her.

That's her all right.

Is she with that guy?

Why don't you ask her?

♪ I can take care of myself

♪ I don't need
Nobody's advice ♪

♪ You're so nice

♪ Ooh

-Hi.
-Hi.

You by yourself?

Yeah.

Me, too.

Can I buy you a drink?

No, but you can
buy your wife a drink.

-Excuse me?
-I said buy your wife a drink.

Oh.

Oh, sorry.

Lose the wedding band.

Oh.

♪ But I can take care
Of myself ♪

♪ My friends all say
I ought to think twice ♪

♪ I can take care of myself

♪ I don't need
Nobody's advice ♪

Kenny.

Are you having fun?

Yeah, I'm having fun.

You want to dance?

Uh, I don't know how to dance.

Come on, I'll teach you.

-No.
-Come on.

Come on.

You can dance.

What is she doing here?

I don't know.

Boy, I never would have
guessed the iron butterfly
would come to Henry's, huh?

Iron butterfly?

It's kind of sad,
don't you think?

A woman that age here?

She must be 35.

I think she's beautiful.

Mm.

♪ They could be correct
In their judgment of you ♪

You want to go somewhere else?

Where?

I don't know. You want
to go for coffee?

Uh, no, I can't. I'm driving.

Oh.

You could leave
your car for them.
We could take my car.

Look at them. I mean,
they're in no condition
to drive,

and I'm responsible
for getting them home safely.

You just don't want
to be with me, do you?

Why are you so mean to me?

I'm not mean to you.

I've been trying to get you
to notice me for months,

and you just
shut me off completely.

Kim, I'm sorry.
You are a good person.

It's just I'm not ready
to get involved right now,
that's all.

[SIGHS]

I feel sorry
for you, Kenny. I do.

Life's more than
working and studying.

You're missing out
on a lot of good stuff.

Have a good time.

Bye, you guys.

Hey, Amanda.

Nice going, Prince.

♪ I don't need
Nobody's advice ♪

[CROWD CHEERING]

Thank you. Thank you.

This song's for all
the broken hearts in the house.

A song called At This Moment.

♪ What did you think

Do you like to dance slow?

Yes, I do.

As a matter of fact.

♪ With tears in your eyes

♪ Tryin' to tell me that you

♪ Found you another

♪ And you just don't love me
No more ♪

♪ Oh

♪ What did you think

♪ I would say at this moment

♪ When I'm faced
With the knowledge ♪

♪ That you just don't love me

♪ Did you think
I would curse you ♪

♪ Or say things to hurt you

♪ 'Cause you just don't love me No more ♪

♪ Did you think
I could hate you ♪

♪ Or raise my hands to you

♪ Now come on
You know me too well ♪

♪ How could I hurt you

♪ When darling I love you

♪ And you know

♪ I'd never, never hurt you

♪ Whoo

♪ What do you think

♪ I would give at this moment

♪ If you stay

♪ I'd subtract 20 years
From my life ♪

♪ I'd fall down on my knees

♪ Kiss the ground
That you walk on ♪

♪ If I could just
Hold you again ♪

[CROWD CHEERING]

Thank you.

We're gonna take a little break.
We'll be right back.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Kenny, check this out. Look.

We got this little surprise
for you, all right.

We'll be back in a couple
of minutes, okay?

-What are you talking about?
-This is so good.

You're gonna love this.

Your friends are
gonna love you for this.

Hey, wait a minute, guys.
I don't think it's such
a good idea.

They don't want you going up
on stage and messing
with the equipment.

Come on.

One, two, three.

♪ I've got sunshine

♪ On a cloudy day

♪ When it's cold outside

♪ I've got the month of May

Come on, you guys.
You're really embarrassing me.

♪ I guess you'd say

- ♪ What can make me
Feel this way? ♪
-Everybody's watching.

That's very funny, you guys.

Now come on down. I don't
want to have to throw you
out of here.

Look, guys.

You don't have
to kill them, okay?
I'll take care of this.

Will you get down?

Tommy, come on,
let's go! Ronnie!

[CONTINUES SINGING]

[OVERLAPPING ARGUMENTS]

I'm really sorry
about this, okay.

It won't happen again.
Come on, Ronnie, get up.

I'm sorry, too.

[SPEAKING GIBBERISH]

You got a lot of
ugly girls in here.

Go on, Tommy.

And don't come back here ever.

[SCATTING]

I'm really sorry about this.

HENRY: It's okay.

Look, you wanna
come back here, I'll uh...
I'll buy you a drink.

I probably won't, but thanks.

["MY GIRL" PLAYING]

♪ I've got sunshine

♪ On a cloudy day

♪ When it's cold outside

♪ I've got the month of May

[MUSIC FADES]

Put a Band-aid on it.

What?

Take a piece of tape,

wrap it around your finger
like you cut yourself.

You think that will do it, huh?

Yeah. When I was married,
I used to do that all the time.

Look, I think I got one
in my wallet here.

-There you go.
-Oh, no, I uh...

No, no, no. Give me your hand.

Give me your hand.
Just the finger.

You see, basically,
women want to believe
that you're available.

-Yeah?
-If you give them
any reason to believe it,

and they will. Look at that.

Huh!

Are you sure about this?

♪ I'm standing
In the shadows of love ♪

♪ I'm getting ready
For the heartaches to come ♪

♪ Can't you see me standing
In the shadows of love ♪

♪ Trying my best to get

♪ Ready for
The heartaches to come ♪

Well, I worked up a sweat
on that one.

I think you'd better sit out
a couple of dances, Grambo.

We don't want to have
to get the paramedics in here.

Grambo, huh?

I didn't see you out there.

Hey, I've got a bad knee,
you know that.

Oh, yeah, yeah, right.

You haven't said anything
about running into Jamie.

What was she doing?

She just came here with, uh...

-Steffi...
-Steffi.

-She's never been here before.
-Uh-huh.

Hey, look, I'd... you know,

I'd feel weird if I ran
into my kid in a bar.

Can we change the subject?

Sure.

Thank you.

Hey.

I sold one of those
five-liter roadsters
the other day

to a guy who'd had a face lift.

How old was he?

I don't know. About your age.

What'd he look like?

Like this.

-I could never do that.
-Yeah, me neither.

Where does it go?

Under your hair.

-Lets me out.
-Yeah.

Say, you know, I heard
about a club in the Valley

that caters to singles
in, like, the 40 to 60 set.

Think we should check it out?

You're kidding.

No.

That means the women
are 40 to 60.

So?

Sometimes I wonder
about you, Charlie.

She's under 40.

Yeah, she sure is.

She looks like she could
use some cheering up.

-So could I.
-So why don't you
go talk to her?

Nah, I'm not in the mood.

Come on, go talk to her.

It'll make you feel better.

-Think so, huh?
-Hey.

I bet she'd be thrilled
to talk to a real live
airline pilot.

♪ If I have to beg
Plead for your sympathy ♪

♪ I don't mind 'cause you mean That much to me ♪

♪ Ain't too proud to beg
And you know it ♪

♪ Please don't leave me girl

What are you doing here
all by yourself?

No, I'm not.
I came with friends.

I'd like to be by myself
for a while, though.

I'm Sam. I'm an airline pilot.
What's your name?

Kim.

I like that. Kim, huh?
What do you do, Kim?

I'm a call-girl.

Really?

No, you're kidding. You're not.

You're not really a call-girl.
Is she a call-girl?

Hi, I'm Sam.
I'm an airline pilot.

-Look, Sam.
-What's your name?

Um, would you be a dear
and leave us alone
for a little while?

Because I really have
to talk to my friend here,

and we don't need
an audience.

Would you excuse us, please?

Yeah, sure, no problem.

That guy's old enough
to be my father.

♪ Just to keep you
From walking away ♪

♪ Let your friends laugh
Even this I can stand ♪

So how'd it go?

Flung herself
at your feet, right?

Shut up, all right, Charlie?

What's the matter?
Too proud to beg?

Ha.

-Hey, where are you going?
-To think.

To think?

Never heard of such a thing.

[GRUNTS]

This is for you lovers
out there.

Old lovers and new lovers.

Sometime love can hurt.

Sometime love
feels like a prison.

Oh, but it can hurt so good.

Oh, yeah.

I love what I do.

But don't ask me
if I know Michael Jackson.

[CHUCKLES]

Okay.

Do you like sports?

Bears, Bulls and Blackhawks.

Chicago.

Chicago.

So if you were married

and your husband came home
and turned on
Monday Night Football,

you wouldn't get mad?

I'd insist.

Have you ever been married?

No.

Why not?

I never met the right man.

Have you ever been married?

I've been close,
but it just never seemed right.

I've never even been close.

Oh, come on, you probably
have a hundred guys
chasing after you.

Yeah? I'm very picky.

It's hard finding a man
who's not intimidated
by what I do.

Hm?

You only need to find one.

Wanna dance?

Yeah.

Hi.

-Hi.
-I'm Barbara.

I'm Pete.

-Can I buy you a drink?
-Yeah. Thanks, Pete.

Bartender?

[LAUGHING]

What's so funny?

The Band-Aid
over your wedding ring.

Do you actually think you're
gonna fool anybody?

No.

No, I thought it was
a dumb idea,
but this guy insisted.

Nice talking to you, Barbara.

I thought you were
gonna buy me a drink.

It doesn't bother you
that I'm married?

No.

[CHUCKLING]

What's the matter?

What's wrong? Pete?

Oh, Barbara, it's been
very nice talking to you.

I've got to go.

Henry, this could be the one.

-Yeah?
-Yeah.

This girl is beautiful,

she's smart, she knows sports,
she's successful.

She's everything.
She's everything
that I'm looking for.

How does she feel about you?

I'll let you know
in the morning.

Hi, Pamela.

I'd like you to meet
my brother, Henry.

Henry, this is Pamela Ahlberg.

-Hi.
-Hi. Nice to meet you.

-Yeah, you've got
a nice club here.
-Ah, thank you.

So, Henry,
can I trust this guy?

Yeah.

Good answer.

-You ready?
-Yeah.

Nice to meet you.

Heartbreaker.

-Excuse me.
-Julie.

Peter.

What a surprise.

What are you doing here?

I just stopped by for a drink.

Oh, yeah. Me too.

I had no idea
it was this kind of place.

No, me neither.

Is Jack here?

No, he's out of town this week.
Had to go to Boston.

Oh, right. Yeah.

-Is Laura still in Denver?
-Uh-huh.

You know, she had that reunion.

Oh, yeah, she mentioned that.

[CHUCKLES]

Well, uh, I'm heading for home.

Yeah, yeah, me too.

-Say hi to Jack.
-Say hi to Laura.

-Bye-bye.
-Bye.

[CAR ENGINE STARTS]

-Are you all right?
-What?

I asked if you were okay.
Are you?

No.

Anything I can do to help?

Not really.
I just had a big fight.

With your boyfriend?

With my father.

Here?

Yeah. [CHUCKLES]

It's pretty weird, huh?

Slightly.

Uh, would you rather be alone?

No. I need somebody to talk to.

Can I ask you a question?

Sure.

Do you get along
with your parents?

No. Not really.

What would you do if you
really needed to communicate

and they just couldn't
be straight with you?

Nothing.

Did you ever try?

Yeah, once. With my father.

What happened?

Whacked me right
across the room.

What did you do?

I left.

Seems like you turned out okay.

I could find you 20 people
that think I'm totally weird.

[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

So what do you think
I should do about my dad?

Show him you don't need him.

I can't. I love him.

I really love him a lot.

And I want him to love me, too.

I just wish he would
be honest with me.

I mean, I wish he'd
be honest with himself.

You must think I'm pretty
grotesque sitting out here
feeling sorry for myself.

No. Not at all

Well, I feel grotesque.

Um, look, my friend's inside.

She's got the car keys,
and I really wanna
get out of here.

Are you going back in?

Yeah, I guess so.

You don't sound too thrilled.

Well, I have these roommates,

and they got hold
of this video camera,

and they're making rock videos
in the living room.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

How about I buy you a drink?

That'd be nice.

Okay.

Oh, yes.

[SIGHS]

[SCREAMING] No!

Hi, Chris.

Hi. Sam, was it?

You mind if I share
your viewing spot?

No.

I'd just like to apologize
for the way I acted down there.

I shouldn't have
interrupted you guys.

So, you're a travel agent.
What agency do you work for?

I have my own agency.

I'm in the travel biz myself,
sort of. I'm a pilot.

I fly 747s to the Orient.

Oh, I used to fly
those routes all the time
before I had my son.

I probably flew with you.

You've got a kid, huh?

Yeah, he's six.

A real good one, too.

You?

I got a daughter.

She's here tonight.

She's not the one I saw
running away from you, is she?

Looked pretty silly, huh?

Pretty intense.

Is that the way you guys
always talk to each other?

No, not really.

It's tough, you know,
a guy and a daughter.

I mean, since she
hit her teens, it's just been,

"Clean up your room,"

"Turn down the stereo,"

"Get better grades,"
"Get a job."

Not the stuff
of a close relationship.

You look worried about her.

Yeah, I'm worried.

She's always been a good kid.

She never caused us
any real trouble.

But?

Oh, her grades are slipping,

and she's been running
around a lot.

We haven't seen much
of each other since her
mother and I split up.

When was that?

Six months ago.
Real angry at me.

I think I just
gotta leave her alone.

-I don't think so.
-You don't?

I think she's trying
to get your attention.

I remember when I was a kid

trying to get my father
to pay attention to me.

I did some really bad things.

Like what?

Like I bleached my hair blonde
because he loved
Marilyn Monroe so much.

Pretty silly, huh?

Yeah.

You're the most important man
in the world to her.

Chris, would I be being
rude again if I left you here
and went down to talk to her?

No.

I hope it works out.

Thanks a lot.

Chris, I'd like
to ask you something.

What?

I can't do it.

What?

Do you have a business card?

Why? Planning a vacation?

No, I... I would
like to call you.

I would like to take you out.

Okay.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

I'm gonna make a fire.

This place is terrific.

Yeah, I like it.

Excuse me.

No! Don't turn on
the water, please.

Why? What is it?

Uh, I dropped my
wedding ring down the drain.

If you turn the water on,
it'll wash it right
into the river.

It's probably stuck
in the trap here.

It's probably already
in the river.

See? I bet it's right in there.

She's gonna kill me.

All we gotta do
is take the trap off.

I'll go see if we can round up
a pipe wrench.

You think you can get it out?

No problem.

-Stop worrying.
-Uh-huh.

-Stay calm.
-Uh-huh.

-Guard the sink.
-Uh-huh.

-I'll be right back.
-Uh-huh.

Oh, excuse me.

What's going on?

Hi.

I left my car back
in the parking lot.

You'll have to drive me over
and pick it up.

You know, we can do that
in the morning.

I like to wake up alone.

You know, I really want
to stay with you tonight.

Not tonight, Hayden.

When?

I don't know. I'll call you.

You'll call me?

What does that mean?

It means it was great.
That's all.

So, that's it? One night?

Well, you make it sound crummy.

I'd rather say we met...

...and we had fun.

Fun.

You know, I've met a lot
of women in my time,

but I've never met
anybody like you.

You're it for me.

You met me tonight, Hayden.

I don't care. I knew.

I knew the moment I saw you
that you were...
you were the one.

You have every quality that
I'm looking for in a woman.

It wouldn't work, Hayden.

Well, why not?

Because we're not right
for each other.

Well, how could you say that?

I mean, you're perfect for me.

I couldn't design
a better woman.

Hayden, you've dreamed
this up out of thin air.

You can't possibly mean
what you're saying.

But I do.

I mean, I think we'd
be great together.

Don't do this.

Why don't you just come back
to bed, and we can talk
about this tomorrow?

Don't make me say this.

Have you been to Wong's?

Hey, it's this great
Szechuan restaurant. We...

Hayden, I don't want to
get involved with you.

Why? Just tell me why.

Because you're not
what I'm looking for.

[SIGHS]

-But...
-Don't take it
personally, Hayden.

You're a very nice guy.
You really are.

I'm just very, very picky.

But what's wrong with me?
I mean...

Hayden, just take me
to my car, please.

Okay?

I'd better get dressed, then.

I think you'd better.

You know, this is kind of funny.

In a sick way.

Let me get the...

Hey, you want to go out
and have a drink?

And I'll be out
in a few minutes.

No, no. I want to
help you find the ring.

Actually, you're getting more
in the way than you're helping.

Oh.

Oh, uh...

Okay.

I'll, uh...

I'll be out at the bar.

Okay.

Okay.

-My name's Peter.
-Oh, Kenny.

-Kenny.
-Nice to know you.

Thank you.

Kenny, you'll...
you'll let me know as soon
as you find that ring.

You'll be the first
to know, I promise.

I'll let you know.

Okay.

JAMIE: Steffi!

Steffi!

♪ I found myself
In my hometown ♪

♪ I thought I'd take
A look around ♪

♪ My old

♪ Neighborhood

♪ Where my old school
Had been before ♪

♪ A burger stand
And liquor store ♪

♪ Now stood

Mind if I sit down?

♪ You can't go home no more

♪ You can't go home no more

You've wanted to tell me that
for a long time, haven't you?

Well, I think you're right.

You do?

You got all the details right.

But those aren't the real
reasons that your mom
and I split up.

I think it's important
that you know that.

Our love affair ended
a long time ago.

It did.

It just took us a while
to figure it out.

See, when we got married,
we were just kids.

We were your age.

And we had our little apartment
over next to the Air Force base.

And before we knew it,
we were parents.

I didn't know how to be
an adult, let alone be a father.

Then when I got out
of the service, I went
to work for the airline,

and I was gone half the time.

We just woke up one day and we
were married to strangers.

The surprise wasn't
that we split up, honey,

but that we stayed together
as long as we did.

-Dad, I...
-Honey.

I got one more thing
I want to say to you.

Okay.

Even though your mom and I
will never be together again,

she's the best friend
that I ever had.

I really miss her.

It gets lonely in
that big house, you know.

Without you guys.

Which is why I come
to places like this

and make a fool out of myself.

Dad, I didn't mean that.
I just said it because
I was mad at you.

Are you still mad at me?

A little. I love you.

I love you, too.

Well, I have ten days off
before I have to leave again.

Let's do something.

Let's go someplace,
just you and me.

Yeah?

All right.

I'm sorry
I missed your birthday.

Happy birthday.

Want to dance?

♪ You can't go home no more

♪ The past is dead
Dead and gone ♪

♪ You ain't gonna see me
cry no more ♪

♪ You can't go home no more

♪ You can't go home no more

BILLY: All right,
that's it, Jack.

It's 1:00 a.m.
I'm going home
or some place.

I got it.

Oh.

-Thank you.
-You're welcome.

Thank you.

Can I buy you a drink?

Yeah, sure.

Bartender.

I'll have a beer, please.

That was really close.

How long have you been married?

Forever.

That's a long time.

How old are you, anyway?

30.

Got married right
out of high school.

Kind of missed a lot
of stuff, you know.

I haven't had a lot of
experience with women.

Lately, I've been...

Lately, I've been
having these fantasies.

I haven't had a lot of
experience with women either.

I know what you mean
about those fantasies.

You do?

I think about my boss
all the time.

She kills me.

She's really great.

She likes you?

I don't know.

I'm a peon to her.

I mean, I become the
village idiot in her presence.

I can't believe that.

It's true.

That woman is way
out of my league.

I don't know why
I even came back.

I don't know why
I came here either.

Except that my wife
went out of town,
which she never does.

I ended up here.

Spending half the night
in the head.

[LAUGHING]

You know, I am glad
that it happened.

I love my wife.

It's not worth risking
our marriage for.

You know.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

["THE TRACKS
OF MY TEARS" PLAYING]

I gotta go.

Yeah, I guess I'm out of here
as soon as I finish this drink.

Good night, Kenny.

Good night, Peter.

Thanks.

Thank you.
It's a pleasure to meet you.

Drive safe.

This is compliments
of a young lady named Jamie.

♪ So take a good look
At my face ♪

♪ You'll my smile
Looks out of place ♪

♪ If you look closer
It's easy to trace ♪

♪ The tracks of my tears

♪ I need you
Need you ♪

♪ Need you
Need you ♪

♪ Since you left me

♪ If you see me
With another girl ♪

♪ Seeming like I'm having fun

♪ Although she may be cute

♪ She's just a substitute

♪ Because you're
The permanent one ♪

♪ So take a good look
At my face ♪

♪ You'll my smile
Looks out of place ♪

[MUSIC FADING]

PAMELA: Kenny?

You all right?

Yeah, fine.

I thought you left
with that sportscaster guy.

Yeah, I did.
I came back to get my car.

Where are your friends?

I took them home.

How are you gonna get home?

Driving.

In your condition?
No, you're not driving.

Come on,
I'll buy you a coffee.

Am I drunk?

Yeah, you're drunk.

You know, I've never
been drunk before.

Well, you're drunk now.
Get in the car.

Hey, is this like a date?

Yeah, it's a date.
Come on, get in the car.

Hey, Donna.

Oh.

It's getting late, child.
It's getting late.

It's time to boogie.

For all you good folks that have
got somebody to go home with,

and for all you folks that
are going home alone.
But remember,

it may not be a bad idea
to go home by yourself.

[CHUCKLING]

[FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey. Back so soon?

Donna left me.

What do you mean she left you?

She left me.

She moved out of the house.
She packed up all her stuff.

She left me a note.
She took off.

How do you feel?

How do you think I feel?

I'm destroyed.
That's how I feel.

It seems to me Donna
took you off the hook.

I mean, you met the woman
of your dreams tonight, right?

Well, she dumped me, too.

I'm hurting, Henry.

I mean, what am I
supposed to do?

I don't know.

What do you want?
What do you really want?

I want Donna.

Well, that's not what you
told me this morning.

No, I really want her.

All this time I been looking
for the perfect woman,

and I was living with her.

And I didn't realize it
until she left.

I think your ego's bruised.

You want her back,
you can be in control again.

No, I really love her.

You don't want
to listen, so fine.

Go and talk to her.

Uh, maybe you can get
what you want.

I don't think so. I think
Donna's got too much class.

What are you being
so negative for?

Because I'm tired of your act.
It's boring.

You think I'm acting?

I think you feel guilty because
you're relieved she's gone.

I just came here
for a little help.

I'm sorry if I bore you.

Do you want some help? Grow up.

-KENNY: Can I tell you
something, Ms. Ahlberg?
-PAMELA: Sure.

I really think you're great.

Some of the other
people at work, they
call you "iron butterfly."

"Iron butterfly"?

Mm-hm.

But I think you're the best
in the company.

Well, thanks, Kenny.

That's high praise,
coming from you.

How old are you?

22.

Is this your first job
since you got out of school?

Yeah.

What do you have
planned for yourself
in the company, Kenny?

Hm?

Vice president?

President.

I like that.

Do you live alone?

I have thousands of roommates.

You have a girlfriend?

No.

No?

I saw you talking
to Kim at the bar.

I spoke with her.
I think she's nice.

She's okay.

I'm gonna get some more coffee.
You want some?

Yeah. I'll have
some more coffee.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Kenny?

Kenny?

-Are you all right?
-Yeah.

All right, come on,
let's go inside.

Wait. Wait, Mom. Wait.

Dad wants to talk to you.

I have nothing to say to him.

-Yeah, I do want
to you talk, Jackie.
-About what?

Just take a minute.

Just listen to him, okay?

I love you.

-Jamie, this is ridiculous.
-Just talk to him.

Well, what is it you have
to say to me?

[SIGHS]

Well, I had, uh...

quite a talk
with Jamie tonight.

She's very wise.

She, uh... [CLEARS THROAT]

She made me think about...

...myself...

...and our marriage.

I'm sorry, Jackie.

I realize that it's too late

to make any difference,
but I just have to tell you...

...that I'm sorry.

Oh, Sam.

Do you want to go
upstairs and, um,

have a cup of coffee?

Yeah. Yeah,
I'd like to do that.

She is not here.

Have you talked to her tonight?

I talked to her.

Did she tell you
she was moving out?

I've been telling her
to do that for months,

but I didn't think
she had the guts.

Look, I saw her car out there.

-I just want to talk
to her for a second...
-Get out of here!

-I want to talk to her
for a second.
-It's all right, Betsy.

I'll talk to him.

I've thought
about this for months.

My mind's made up.

I want you to come back.

No. Please go.

Will you just listen
to me for a second?

I couldn't believe
you left like that.

I've been warning you.

You don't listen.

I know I have been a jerk,
and I'm sorry.

And I understand why you left.

I didn't realize it
till tonight.

I really love you.

I don't wanna hear this.

I want to make a commitment.

Before I would have given
anything to hear you say that.

But you've lied to me
so many times.

-I don't trust you.
-I'm not lying now.

I swear.

I don't think you're capable
of an adult relationship.

You want me because
you don't want to be alone.

But you also want
to come and go freely.
You can't have everything.

I'll do anything you want.

It will be the same story
all over again.

Hayden, I deserve
better than that.

Just give me one more chance.

It's too late.

["MY GIRL" PLAYING]

♪ I've got sunshine

♪ On a cloudy day

♪ When it's cold outside

♪ I've got the month of May

♪ I guess you'd say

♪ What can make me
Feel this way? ♪

♪ My girl

♪ Talkin' 'bout my girl
My girl♪

Yeah. Give me their
latest projections, Judy.

Okay. Right.

Kenny, just a moment.

Yeah, I'll call you back.
Right. Bye.

I'm really sorry. That's never
happened to me before.

How did you feel
the next morning?

Like there was a piece
of farm equipment in my stomach.

How did I get home anyway?

I took you.

Sit down.

I'm really sorry, Ms. Ahlberg.

I asked you to call me Pam.

You mean I'm not
gonna get fired?

No. No, of course not.

Thank you.

Look, when I was your age,
someone gave me a break.

I think it's time
I passed the favor on.

I'd like to help you.
You're smart,

and you're talented
and you're ambitious.

You're gonna do fine.

If you do one thing,
relax. Just calm down.

I want you to
have lunch with me.

Are you kidding?

Be here at noon.
I think, uh...

I wanna tell you how
that article on tax law fits
into a scheme of mine.

You're gonna
find it interesting.

Get out of here.
I've got work to do.

Thank you very much,
Ms. Ahlberg.

I really appreciate it.

-Okay.
-KENNY: Thank you very much.

You like Chinese food?

You like sports?

[CHUCKLES]

[BOTH LAUGHING]

["I CAN TAKE CARE
OF MYSELF" PLAYING]

♪ They say you like to feel
White gold on your neck ♪

♪ They say when you make love
You like to direct ♪

♪ And that new sports car
You proceeded to wreck ♪

♪ They say I ought to ask
Who picked up the check ♪

♪ I can take care of myself

♪ My friends all say
I ought to think twice ♪

♪ I can take care of myself

♪ I don't need
Nobody's advice ♪

♪ Help

♪ I can take care of myself

♪ I don't need
Nobody's advice ♪