The Unorganized Manager, Part One: Damnation (1996) - full transcript
[MUSIC PLAYING]
My gut feeling is
tomato and basil.
Yes, Brandon, of
course, I understand.
Yes, I realize that.
Yes.
Yes, I know.
Yeah, well, you're on site.
You're the catering manager.
Well, why not tomato and basil soup
today and watercress soup tomorrow?
[BEEPING]
Good, fine, bye.
- Another crisis averted?
- I don't know.
He always seems to need
me to sort things out.
Still, that's what I'm here for.
Now, what was I doing?
You were going to email Dominic
about the catering contract
for the Royal Victoria Hall.
Oh, yes, how far have I got?
- "Dear Dominic."
- Is that it, "Dear Dominic?"
Afternoon, Richard.
How's life in the fast lane?
Stalled on the
central reservation.
Oh, dear.
What can I do for you this
fine afternoon, Keith?
Well, it's about my wedding.
I'm getting a bit worried.
We're doing it at cost, Keith.
There's no way we can reduce--
Oh, no, no, it's not that.
It's just that you know I said I'd
arrange the tent and everything.
Well, the suppliers say
they can't do that weekend.
Do you think you could use
your influence with them?
- I'll see what I can do.
- You're a star.
Yeah, hello, is
that under Canvas?
Yeah, can I speak to Janice--
- Josie.
--Josie Turing, please?
Oh, yeah, hello, Josie.
It's Richard Lewis here.
Yes, that's right, area manager
of Parker and Gibbs catering.
Yeah, now, look.
I understand there's a bit of a problem
for us about a tent on, uh, on, uh--
The 29th.
[BEEPING]
On Saturday, the 29th, yeah.
Oh, look, can you
hang on a minute?
My other phone is going.
Hello.
Oh, Bernard, can you
hang on a minute?
Look, I've got Keith with me.
I'm in a meeting, and
I'm on the other line.
Yeah, look.
Bernard, I can't talk now.
I'll hand you over
to Jane, all right?
Jane, you take this.
He says it's urgent.
Hello. Hello. Hello.
- Yeah, hello, Josie? Josie?
- Bernard?
We've already got 17 confirmed
bookings for the summer--
Vernon--
--with tent and catering
orders increasing by the month.
But the 29th is of
colossal importance to us.
Yes. Yes, that's right.
It's a wedding.
Yeah, well, it's not just
any wedding, you know.
It's, uh, it's Steve
Graham's wedding.
Can't he possibly
talk to you, he says?
No, no, I'll phone him back later.
I told you.
Hello, yeah, I'm calling in
a big favor here, Janice.
Bernard, he says
he'll call you later.
Great, yes, yes, so I'll sit by the phone,
waiting for good news, Janice.
- Yes, I promise I'll tell him.
- Oh, she's hung up.
Well, I think it'll
be all right, Keith.
Well, there is a
heaven [INAUDIBLE].
- Bernard's got a crisis on effect.
- What's happened now?
Uh, meat deliveries
haven't turned up.
Staff haven't arrived, and he's
discovered his float is light.
Oh, another thief in our
midst, what did you say?
- I said I'd tell you.
- Yes?
Well, is that all?
- Well, what else? I tried to--
What else? Jane, have
I got to do everything?
It would appear so, yes.
Well, if you'll
excuse me, I'll, um--
Can-- can you get Bernard
on the phone for us, Jane?
- I've just put it down.
- Yes, um--
[BEEPING]
What's happening?
No reply, he must have
gone off to hang himself.
Apparently, he can't blow his
nose without insulting me.
He said he had to talk to
you because he can't sack
one of the kitchen staff for
stealing without your OK.
- You said all decisions are to--
- Oh, yeah, yeah, I see.
Um, well, he knows who it was then?
Well, look.
I don't want to monopolize you,
but will you please keep trying to
get a hold of Bernard? Try his mobile.
- What about the email?
- Huh? What email?
Dominic, you said it had
to go off immediately.
Oh, it does.
Do you realize how much the new contract
at the Royal Victoria Hall means to us?
We're opening up their
own site in seven weeks.
We've got to sent it off immediately.
- You'd better finish it then.
Well, how far have I got?
- "Dear Dominic."
- Oh.
Ah, Richard.
Oh, Erica, Erica, come in.
Come in.
Sit down.
Coffee?
- Yes.
Um, now, what can I do for you?
Oh, well, I thought-- you've
asked me to pop in to see you.
That was tomorrow, wasn't it?
Well, that's-- that's great, great.
Uh, stay there.
Why wasn't it in
the diary, Jane?
Oh, here it is. "4:45 today, Erica
restarting as district manager on Monday."
Yes, you said you'd
brief me this afternoon.
[PHONE RINGING]
Yes, of course.
Oh, get that for me,
would you, Jane, please?
I'm in a meeting.
- Richard Lewis's phone.
Right, now, um, you've been
catering manager for how long now?
It's the managing director's assistant.
The MG is leaving her office.
Apparently, you said you had
to speak to her this afternoon.
Well, do I have to?
It can wait till tomorrow.
She's in Chicago for the restaurant
she opens tomorrow for the week.
What? Well, tell her I'll
catch her on the way down.
Yes, all right, he'll catch her on the
way down, yes, like he usually does.
Ah, well, Erica, look. There's nothing
else I need to tell you really.
You can handle it.
Uh, uh, you've go your car keys.
You know your patch. Off you go.
- Richard?
Uh, 15 contracts in your care, now
that is a big challenge. Good luck.
Uh, anything else you need
to know, just ask Jane, OK?
- Oh, could you pass my pen, please.
- What about your call to Bernard?
[PHONE RINGING]
- Uh, tell him I'll be there tomorrow.
- And the email to Dominic?
Uh, first thing in the AM.
Put it in the diary.
[INAUDIBLE]
Jane, I can't do everything.
[SECOND PHONE RINGING]
Carol, Carol, Carol,
no, Carol, I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry about this 11th-hour assault.
- What is it?
Remember, I spoke to you about
the Royal Victory Hall budget?
- No.
- Well, I did, a week ago, here.
Well, in the car park
actually, you were
just hurrying away
from a board meeting.
I asked you to send me a report.
And as I hadn't heard from you,
I thought you'd solved the problem.
I'm on my way to Chicago
for the restaurant show.
Yes, I know that, Carol, but--
Call me in Chicago, and
don't forget this time.
No, no, but-- but I need a decision
on the Royal Vic by Thursday.
[GASPING]
- Hello, Trevor.
- You forgot my birthday party.
Of course, I didn't.
I-- I got stuck in a meeting.
How did it go?
- Can you set my new computer up?
Yes, later, though, I've
just got all this work to do.
Hi. I did try, but I couldn't
make it back for the party.
Just so long as you've got
your priorities right, Richard.
Well, you said there
would only by mums there.
- I was making it easy for you.
- How did it go?
Noisy, but they seemed
to enjoy themselves.
Well, great, great.
Look, I'm sorry. I did try.
- I didn't really think you would.
- Now hurry up and get changed.
- What?
We're going to the Jacksons',
or had you forgotten that, too?
- We can't. We can't.
- Why not?
I think I'm having
a heart attack.
[EMERGENCY SIRENS]
[MONITOR BEEPING STEADILY]
[MONITOR BEATING MORE RAPIDLY]
[MONITOR FLATLINING]
[BELL RINGING]
[DIRGE PLAYING]
(SINGING) Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah,
hallelujah, hallelujah!
Ah, uh, hello.
- Hello.
- Can I help?
Uh, well, yes,
I'm Richard Lewis.
- Oh, hello. How do you do? Saint Peter.
- Ah, pleased to meet you.
- Excellent, well--
- Well, what-- what happens now?
- Well, what did you have in mind?
- Well, can I come in?
Come in?
Uh, well, I'll-- I'll check.
Uh, yes, do-- do step
inside, please, just,
uh, just for the
moment, you understand.
Now Richard Lewis.
[BEEPING]
No, no Richard Lewis
today, I'm afraid.
So you must be due at the,
um, the-- the other place.
Oh, that's not possible.
There must be a mistake.
I've lived a good life.
Well, I've-- I've always
made time for other people.
I've always had an open door.
I'm kind.
I'm patient.
I've tried so hard to do things right.
Are you sure?
- What are you doing?
- I'm checking L.
- Hell?
- No, no, L, for Lewis.
[MUSIC - "OH WHEN THE SAINTS GO
MARCHING IN"]
- What's that music?
- Oh, that's the saints.
They're practicing marching in.
Ah, here we are.
[BEEPING]
Oh.
- What?
Well, you're an S1, I'm afraid.
Well, what does that mean?
Well, the classic sinner,
the man who does evil
while thinking that
he's doing good.
Me?
No, I've always helped everyone.
They like me. They appreciate
what I've tried to do.
Yeah, um, would you like to
see what one or two of them
actually said about
you this very day?
There.
- He's ghastly to work with.
When he is in the office,
he messes me around all day.
I never know what's happening, and
he'll never let me get on with my work.
I'm supposed to work with him and
the three district managers as well.
He darts sit around all day like a
jumping jack, busy doing nothing.
When I need him, I
can never find him.
He's always under
pressure, and he
acts as if he's the only one
with anything important to do.
You just don't
know where you are.
When I really need his
help, he hasn't got time
to talk about anything properly.
And I'm so confused
about the job.
I just haven't got
any confidence left.
He's driving me around the bend.
You can't ask him for guidance
because he just takes over.
He wants to be consulted
about everything,
but you can never
get a hold of him.
He's always in a meeting
or on the other line.
So when things happen like
today with the theft, forget it.
I just hope he's not as chaotic to
work with as he is to live with.
He forgets everything,
even birthdays.
He says he'll do things
and then cancels them
at the last minute because
he hasn't got time.
You can never rely on him.
More?
Working with Richard is a bit
like being back at school.
Every month, without fail,
there he is, marking my work
and smiling at me
in that way of his.
I know he's only trying to be
nice, but it's so insulting.
I mean, I am 25.
I know what I'm doing.
I just wish he'd stop
wasting his time and mine
and trust me to get on with it.
I don't believe it.
Where did I go wrong?
Well, it won't help you if I spell it out
for you, but I'll tell you what I'll do.
I'll show you what you did, and then you
can work out what you did wrong, OK?
Now let's take a look at
what happened last Monday.
- Good morning, all.
- Good morning.
- Good morning, Jane.
- Good morning, Richard.
I have got so much
on today, Jane.
Shirley Debb from accounts, you
asked to see her first thing.
Fine, let's not hang around.
Good morning, Shirley.
There are one or two other things
in the diary. Then there's the mail.
I thought perhaps that we
could sort through this first.
Uh, no, let's do that later. I want
to check the accounts right away.
Fine, then do you mind if I go
and sort through Jim Allen's mail?
Applications for a clerical
assistant are coming in.
No, stick around.
I might need you.
- I don't know what else is on today.
- That's just what I was trying to--
Fine, yes.
Shirley.
I've got the spreadsheet from Fernicon's
staff restaurant as requested.
Oh, good, good, let's go
through them then, shall we?
Why not?
We always do.
Hmm, cleaning materials,
mm-hmm, disinfectant, yes,
um, what's, um, what's that
amount for advertising?
That was a local
advert for a cook.
Oh, well, next time,
get me to call them.
I can place an advert
for less than that.
Well, you see, I mean, that's
put us over by, uh, 0.003%.
But we're under budget overall.
Hmm, yeah, uh, oh, 3% increase
in the wages bill, I noticed.
Well, we lost a casual
assistant and employed a cook.
Oh, yes, yes, yes, well, I suppose what
with the-- the current rates, that's, uh--
[TYPING]
- See?
- What?
Give me strength.
You don't see.
Right, um, how many contracts is a
district manager responsible for?
15.
15, right, and how many
districts in your area?
3.
So you are responsible
for 45 contracts,
and you spend one entire hour of
your Monday morning doing that.
- How much money did you save?
- Well, I didn't actually save anything.
Not actually, I see.
How much did it actually
cost you for your time,
Shirley's time, and
Jane's wasted time?
No, it's a way of keeping
everybody on their toes.
So is setting fire
to the building.
Moving on, let's take a look
at what happened on Wednesday,
when you actually saw Bernard.
I happened to notice
on a printout, Bernard,
that we paid for 480 frozen croissants,
when we only took a delivery of 400.
Yes, well, I didn't
bother to double check
because I knew you'd go
through the figures anyway.
- Well, you're the district manager.
- It's supposed to be your responsibility.
- Yes, but you always do it anyway.
- Yes, but-- oh, never mind.
Make sure the 80 croissants
are credited next week.
Now what problems have
you got this week?
- Any more complaints about the menu?
- The food? No.
No, no, no, no, no, the menu, they didn't
like the way it was displayed, remember?
- Oh, yeah.
- Don't you remember? [INAUDIBLE]
Yeah, sure, yeah, it's
up there on the wall.
Yes, I can see that. But if they're
worried about not being able to see it
until they're in the restaurant, why don't
you put one up on the stairs as well?
Oh, yeah, that's possible.
Thanks.
I can do that, then, can I?
- Well, I should think so.
- Yes, well, shall I?
- Yes, good Lord.
There's a couple of other things that
I really need to talk to you about.
Yeah, but, look. Bernard,
I'm a bit late, and I've got
an appointment upstairs with
the finance [INAUDIBLE].
I've got a few [INAUDIBLE]
staffing problems. Yeah, yeah yeah.
- There's stealing going on.
- Bernard, call me.
When?
When?
You'll be busy, or
you won't be there.
When?
What's the matter?
I was solving his problems.
Precisely, you
were doing his job.
No wonder you have so
little time to do your own.
Well, what is mine then?
Well, not his, for a start,
we'll deal with that later.
Look. Focus now,
please, on that meeting
you had with the finance
director at Universal.
Universal, right, one of
your most important clients.
Did you get my proposal for
your new regional offices?
I did, but there's something else we
need to talk about first, Richard.
- OK.
- Last month's figures.
- What's the problem?
- The problem, as I'm sure you know,
is that catering costs
were over budget by 18%.
18%?
There must be a mistake.
No, well, we've had a few
problems in the office,
and, uh, well, I haven't
quite given this the time.
No, I'm sure I
can sort this out.
The point is there's no way we can pick up
that sort of overspend. It's down to you.
Yes, but the reason-- I can go into it when
I get back and let you know what happened.
Whatever the reason, we've
had to make decisions,
and I've had to reassure the board.
We'll be cutting your fee this month
to match the overspend,
unless you can, uh,
find some way of making
the savings yourself.
Well, if you could just
give me a day or two.
I don't need to tell you, Richard, that
I can hardly discuss new contracts
when there are problems here
and now-- priorities, Richard.
18%, well, there's
no-- there's no way.
We-- we can't cut that without,
uh, without slashing costs.
And we're already
down to the bones.
So the only way we could do that
would be by cutting staff and--
Well, I'm sure you'll do
whatever is necessary, Richard.
Shall we say by, uh, Thursday?
OK, OK, leave it with me.
Uh, I'll look into it, and I'll come
back to you by Thursday afternoon.
What day is it today?
You weren't ready
for the meeting
because you hadn't given yourself
enough time to prepare for the meeting.
So you could only react.
- Ew.
- What?
Reactive management, yuck, but
then you made things even worse.
Joe, what is going on?
Where is everybody?
- They're all here.
- You're three short.
- They're gone, redundancies.
- What?
- Richard Lewis's decision.
- I don't believe it.
Nobody tells me anything
Well, why didn't you tell him?
Well, I was embarrassed because I
ought to have consulted him first.
Oh, I see.
Straight down the stairs, follow your nose.
You can't miss it really.
No, no, please, give me one
more chance, please, please.
Provided you go back and put right
everything that you've done wrong.
Fine, uh, what exactly?
Well, I mean, where
does one begin?
I mean, allowing everyone
else to interrupt you,
getting sidetracked
by irrelevancies,
I mean, doing jobs you don't need to
do, not establishing your priorities.
- Priorities?
- Yes, priorities.
Anything else?
Uh, wasting everyone else's
time as well as your own.
- Such as? - Jane.
- Well, I'm not sure if Jane--
I mean, you fritter your whole day away.
You never have enough time for your staff.
- Well, that's not true.
- Yes, it is!
Well, I'm truly very
sorry, but I meant well.
- Ah.
- I repent.
And I'll be a different person if
I can just have one more chance.
I don't want you to
be a different person.
I want you to be the same
person, but organized.
- I'll try.
- Last chance, all right?
Thank you. Thank you.
You're an angel.
No, I'm not.
I'm a certified saint.
- Oh, you'd better have one of these.
- What is it, a Bible?
No, no, it's the Video Arts pack on
organizing yourself and other people.
We use it up here, you know.
[SCREAMING]
It's all right, everyone.
Panic over, I'm absolutely fine.
Oh, excuse me.
I'd forgotten this.
It's from, uh, well, it's
just-- I brought it with me
in case I woke up during the uh-.
Bye.
- Good morning.
- Good morning, Jane.
I am gonna make a really
organized start today.
Can we work together all day?
Richard, are you
feeling all right?
Fine, fine, yes, I'm the
same person, organized.
I heard you were
taken ill last night.
Oh, yes, yes, it was
nothing, just a heart attack.
- Should you be here?
- Yes, yes, yes, I'll be all right.
Now we have got all sorts
of things to do today.
We must, uh, make sure we've
got hold of Keith's tent,
and I must send that
email off to Dominic.
And, oh, let's get
a hold of Erica
and see how she's getting
on as district manager.
- Where's the mail, by the way?
- Here.
Ah, anything interesting?
I don't know. We haven't
sorted out yesterday's yet.
Right, well, let's due that, uh,
right now as well then-- organized.
Well, here's yesterday's.
Yeah, in fact, here's
the whole pending tray.
God, there must be
weeks of stuff there.
Now I want you to take
that all, go through it,
and throw out anything we've
missed the deadline for.
Then summarize
everything that's vital.
I'm so organized,
it's frightening.
And today's mail, oh, and let's get a
hold of Bernard on the phone right away.
When do you want it
done by, in what order?
Well, I want it all done now.
Don't be such a pain, Jane.
Would you like me to paint the
outside of the building as well?
- What's that supposed to mean?
- Work it out.
Well, that didn't take long, did it?
I should never have let you live.
You're completely hopeless.
- But I was only doing what you--
You can't just throw everything
at her and expect her to cope.
- Oh, that's what she meant.
- Yes.
- But I was delegating.
- That's not delegating.
That's abdicating.
In any case, you can't delegate until
you've got yourself organized.
Why not?
You can't organize other people
if you can't organize yourself.
How do you mean?
I can see I'm gonna have to
start right at the beginning.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
My gut feeling is
tomato and basil.
Yes, Brandon, of
course, I understand.
Yes, I realize that.
Yes.
Yes, I know.
Yeah, well, you're on site.
You're the catering manager.
Well, why not tomato and basil soup
today and watercress soup tomorrow?
[BEEPING]
Good, fine, bye.
- Another crisis averted?
- I don't know.
He always seems to need
me to sort things out.
Still, that's what I'm here for.
Now, what was I doing?
You were going to email Dominic
about the catering contract
for the Royal Victoria Hall.
Oh, yes, how far have I got?
- "Dear Dominic."
- Is that it, "Dear Dominic?"
Afternoon, Richard.
How's life in the fast lane?
Stalled on the
central reservation.
Oh, dear.
What can I do for you this
fine afternoon, Keith?
Well, it's about my wedding.
I'm getting a bit worried.
We're doing it at cost, Keith.
There's no way we can reduce--
Oh, no, no, it's not that.
It's just that you know I said I'd
arrange the tent and everything.
Well, the suppliers say
they can't do that weekend.
Do you think you could use
your influence with them?
- I'll see what I can do.
- You're a star.
Yeah, hello, is
that under Canvas?
Yeah, can I speak to Janice--
- Josie.
--Josie Turing, please?
Oh, yeah, hello, Josie.
It's Richard Lewis here.
Yes, that's right, area manager
of Parker and Gibbs catering.
Yeah, now, look.
I understand there's a bit of a problem
for us about a tent on, uh, on, uh--
The 29th.
[BEEPING]
On Saturday, the 29th, yeah.
Oh, look, can you
hang on a minute?
My other phone is going.
Hello.
Oh, Bernard, can you
hang on a minute?
Look, I've got Keith with me.
I'm in a meeting, and
I'm on the other line.
Yeah, look.
Bernard, I can't talk now.
I'll hand you over
to Jane, all right?
Jane, you take this.
He says it's urgent.
Hello. Hello. Hello.
- Yeah, hello, Josie? Josie?
- Bernard?
We've already got 17 confirmed
bookings for the summer--
Vernon--
--with tent and catering
orders increasing by the month.
But the 29th is of
colossal importance to us.
Yes. Yes, that's right.
It's a wedding.
Yeah, well, it's not just
any wedding, you know.
It's, uh, it's Steve
Graham's wedding.
Can't he possibly
talk to you, he says?
No, no, I'll phone him back later.
I told you.
Hello, yeah, I'm calling in
a big favor here, Janice.
Bernard, he says
he'll call you later.
Great, yes, yes, so I'll sit by the phone,
waiting for good news, Janice.
- Yes, I promise I'll tell him.
- Oh, she's hung up.
Well, I think it'll
be all right, Keith.
Well, there is a
heaven [INAUDIBLE].
- Bernard's got a crisis on effect.
- What's happened now?
Uh, meat deliveries
haven't turned up.
Staff haven't arrived, and he's
discovered his float is light.
Oh, another thief in our
midst, what did you say?
- I said I'd tell you.
- Yes?
Well, is that all?
- Well, what else? I tried to--
What else? Jane, have
I got to do everything?
It would appear so, yes.
Well, if you'll
excuse me, I'll, um--
Can-- can you get Bernard
on the phone for us, Jane?
- I've just put it down.
- Yes, um--
[BEEPING]
What's happening?
No reply, he must have
gone off to hang himself.
Apparently, he can't blow his
nose without insulting me.
He said he had to talk to
you because he can't sack
one of the kitchen staff for
stealing without your OK.
- You said all decisions are to--
- Oh, yeah, yeah, I see.
Um, well, he knows who it was then?
Well, look.
I don't want to monopolize you,
but will you please keep trying to
get a hold of Bernard? Try his mobile.
- What about the email?
- Huh? What email?
Dominic, you said it had
to go off immediately.
Oh, it does.
Do you realize how much the new contract
at the Royal Victoria Hall means to us?
We're opening up their
own site in seven weeks.
We've got to sent it off immediately.
- You'd better finish it then.
Well, how far have I got?
- "Dear Dominic."
- Oh.
Ah, Richard.
Oh, Erica, Erica, come in.
Come in.
Sit down.
Coffee?
- Yes.
Um, now, what can I do for you?
Oh, well, I thought-- you've
asked me to pop in to see you.
That was tomorrow, wasn't it?
Well, that's-- that's great, great.
Uh, stay there.
Why wasn't it in
the diary, Jane?
Oh, here it is. "4:45 today, Erica
restarting as district manager on Monday."
Yes, you said you'd
brief me this afternoon.
[PHONE RINGING]
Yes, of course.
Oh, get that for me,
would you, Jane, please?
I'm in a meeting.
- Richard Lewis's phone.
Right, now, um, you've been
catering manager for how long now?
It's the managing director's assistant.
The MG is leaving her office.
Apparently, you said you had
to speak to her this afternoon.
Well, do I have to?
It can wait till tomorrow.
She's in Chicago for the restaurant
she opens tomorrow for the week.
What? Well, tell her I'll
catch her on the way down.
Yes, all right, he'll catch her on the
way down, yes, like he usually does.
Ah, well, Erica, look. There's nothing
else I need to tell you really.
You can handle it.
Uh, uh, you've go your car keys.
You know your patch. Off you go.
- Richard?
Uh, 15 contracts in your care, now
that is a big challenge. Good luck.
Uh, anything else you need
to know, just ask Jane, OK?
- Oh, could you pass my pen, please.
- What about your call to Bernard?
[PHONE RINGING]
- Uh, tell him I'll be there tomorrow.
- And the email to Dominic?
Uh, first thing in the AM.
Put it in the diary.
[INAUDIBLE]
Jane, I can't do everything.
[SECOND PHONE RINGING]
Carol, Carol, Carol,
no, Carol, I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry about this 11th-hour assault.
- What is it?
Remember, I spoke to you about
the Royal Victory Hall budget?
- No.
- Well, I did, a week ago, here.
Well, in the car park
actually, you were
just hurrying away
from a board meeting.
I asked you to send me a report.
And as I hadn't heard from you,
I thought you'd solved the problem.
I'm on my way to Chicago
for the restaurant show.
Yes, I know that, Carol, but--
Call me in Chicago, and
don't forget this time.
No, no, but-- but I need a decision
on the Royal Vic by Thursday.
[GASPING]
- Hello, Trevor.
- You forgot my birthday party.
Of course, I didn't.
I-- I got stuck in a meeting.
How did it go?
- Can you set my new computer up?
Yes, later, though, I've
just got all this work to do.
Hi. I did try, but I couldn't
make it back for the party.
Just so long as you've got
your priorities right, Richard.
Well, you said there
would only by mums there.
- I was making it easy for you.
- How did it go?
Noisy, but they seemed
to enjoy themselves.
Well, great, great.
Look, I'm sorry. I did try.
- I didn't really think you would.
- Now hurry up and get changed.
- What?
We're going to the Jacksons',
or had you forgotten that, too?
- We can't. We can't.
- Why not?
I think I'm having
a heart attack.
[EMERGENCY SIRENS]
[MONITOR BEEPING STEADILY]
[MONITOR BEATING MORE RAPIDLY]
[MONITOR FLATLINING]
[BELL RINGING]
[DIRGE PLAYING]
(SINGING) Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah,
hallelujah, hallelujah!
Ah, uh, hello.
- Hello.
- Can I help?
Uh, well, yes,
I'm Richard Lewis.
- Oh, hello. How do you do? Saint Peter.
- Ah, pleased to meet you.
- Excellent, well--
- Well, what-- what happens now?
- Well, what did you have in mind?
- Well, can I come in?
Come in?
Uh, well, I'll-- I'll check.
Uh, yes, do-- do step
inside, please, just,
uh, just for the
moment, you understand.
Now Richard Lewis.
[BEEPING]
No, no Richard Lewis
today, I'm afraid.
So you must be due at the,
um, the-- the other place.
Oh, that's not possible.
There must be a mistake.
I've lived a good life.
Well, I've-- I've always
made time for other people.
I've always had an open door.
I'm kind.
I'm patient.
I've tried so hard to do things right.
Are you sure?
- What are you doing?
- I'm checking L.
- Hell?
- No, no, L, for Lewis.
[MUSIC - "OH WHEN THE SAINTS GO
MARCHING IN"]
- What's that music?
- Oh, that's the saints.
They're practicing marching in.
Ah, here we are.
[BEEPING]
Oh.
- What?
Well, you're an S1, I'm afraid.
Well, what does that mean?
Well, the classic sinner,
the man who does evil
while thinking that
he's doing good.
Me?
No, I've always helped everyone.
They like me. They appreciate
what I've tried to do.
Yeah, um, would you like to
see what one or two of them
actually said about
you this very day?
There.
- He's ghastly to work with.
When he is in the office,
he messes me around all day.
I never know what's happening, and
he'll never let me get on with my work.
I'm supposed to work with him and
the three district managers as well.
He darts sit around all day like a
jumping jack, busy doing nothing.
When I need him, I
can never find him.
He's always under
pressure, and he
acts as if he's the only one
with anything important to do.
You just don't
know where you are.
When I really need his
help, he hasn't got time
to talk about anything properly.
And I'm so confused
about the job.
I just haven't got
any confidence left.
He's driving me around the bend.
You can't ask him for guidance
because he just takes over.
He wants to be consulted
about everything,
but you can never
get a hold of him.
He's always in a meeting
or on the other line.
So when things happen like
today with the theft, forget it.
I just hope he's not as chaotic to
work with as he is to live with.
He forgets everything,
even birthdays.
He says he'll do things
and then cancels them
at the last minute because
he hasn't got time.
You can never rely on him.
More?
Working with Richard is a bit
like being back at school.
Every month, without fail,
there he is, marking my work
and smiling at me
in that way of his.
I know he's only trying to be
nice, but it's so insulting.
I mean, I am 25.
I know what I'm doing.
I just wish he'd stop
wasting his time and mine
and trust me to get on with it.
I don't believe it.
Where did I go wrong?
Well, it won't help you if I spell it out
for you, but I'll tell you what I'll do.
I'll show you what you did, and then you
can work out what you did wrong, OK?
Now let's take a look at
what happened last Monday.
- Good morning, all.
- Good morning.
- Good morning, Jane.
- Good morning, Richard.
I have got so much
on today, Jane.
Shirley Debb from accounts, you
asked to see her first thing.
Fine, let's not hang around.
Good morning, Shirley.
There are one or two other things
in the diary. Then there's the mail.
I thought perhaps that we
could sort through this first.
Uh, no, let's do that later. I want
to check the accounts right away.
Fine, then do you mind if I go
and sort through Jim Allen's mail?
Applications for a clerical
assistant are coming in.
No, stick around.
I might need you.
- I don't know what else is on today.
- That's just what I was trying to--
Fine, yes.
Shirley.
I've got the spreadsheet from Fernicon's
staff restaurant as requested.
Oh, good, good, let's go
through them then, shall we?
Why not?
We always do.
Hmm, cleaning materials,
mm-hmm, disinfectant, yes,
um, what's, um, what's that
amount for advertising?
That was a local
advert for a cook.
Oh, well, next time,
get me to call them.
I can place an advert
for less than that.
Well, you see, I mean, that's
put us over by, uh, 0.003%.
But we're under budget overall.
Hmm, yeah, uh, oh, 3% increase
in the wages bill, I noticed.
Well, we lost a casual
assistant and employed a cook.
Oh, yes, yes, yes, well, I suppose what
with the-- the current rates, that's, uh--
[TYPING]
- See?
- What?
Give me strength.
You don't see.
Right, um, how many contracts is a
district manager responsible for?
15.
15, right, and how many
districts in your area?
3.
So you are responsible
for 45 contracts,
and you spend one entire hour of
your Monday morning doing that.
- How much money did you save?
- Well, I didn't actually save anything.
Not actually, I see.
How much did it actually
cost you for your time,
Shirley's time, and
Jane's wasted time?
No, it's a way of keeping
everybody on their toes.
So is setting fire
to the building.
Moving on, let's take a look
at what happened on Wednesday,
when you actually saw Bernard.
I happened to notice
on a printout, Bernard,
that we paid for 480 frozen croissants,
when we only took a delivery of 400.
Yes, well, I didn't
bother to double check
because I knew you'd go
through the figures anyway.
- Well, you're the district manager.
- It's supposed to be your responsibility.
- Yes, but you always do it anyway.
- Yes, but-- oh, never mind.
Make sure the 80 croissants
are credited next week.
Now what problems have
you got this week?
- Any more complaints about the menu?
- The food? No.
No, no, no, no, no, the menu, they didn't
like the way it was displayed, remember?
- Oh, yeah.
- Don't you remember? [INAUDIBLE]
Yeah, sure, yeah, it's
up there on the wall.
Yes, I can see that. But if they're
worried about not being able to see it
until they're in the restaurant, why don't
you put one up on the stairs as well?
Oh, yeah, that's possible.
Thanks.
I can do that, then, can I?
- Well, I should think so.
- Yes, well, shall I?
- Yes, good Lord.
There's a couple of other things that
I really need to talk to you about.
Yeah, but, look. Bernard,
I'm a bit late, and I've got
an appointment upstairs with
the finance [INAUDIBLE].
I've got a few [INAUDIBLE]
staffing problems. Yeah, yeah yeah.
- There's stealing going on.
- Bernard, call me.
When?
When?
You'll be busy, or
you won't be there.
When?
What's the matter?
I was solving his problems.
Precisely, you
were doing his job.
No wonder you have so
little time to do your own.
Well, what is mine then?
Well, not his, for a start,
we'll deal with that later.
Look. Focus now,
please, on that meeting
you had with the finance
director at Universal.
Universal, right, one of
your most important clients.
Did you get my proposal for
your new regional offices?
I did, but there's something else we
need to talk about first, Richard.
- OK.
- Last month's figures.
- What's the problem?
- The problem, as I'm sure you know,
is that catering costs
were over budget by 18%.
18%?
There must be a mistake.
No, well, we've had a few
problems in the office,
and, uh, well, I haven't
quite given this the time.
No, I'm sure I
can sort this out.
The point is there's no way we can pick up
that sort of overspend. It's down to you.
Yes, but the reason-- I can go into it when
I get back and let you know what happened.
Whatever the reason, we've
had to make decisions,
and I've had to reassure the board.
We'll be cutting your fee this month
to match the overspend,
unless you can, uh,
find some way of making
the savings yourself.
Well, if you could just
give me a day or two.
I don't need to tell you, Richard, that
I can hardly discuss new contracts
when there are problems here
and now-- priorities, Richard.
18%, well, there's
no-- there's no way.
We-- we can't cut that without,
uh, without slashing costs.
And we're already
down to the bones.
So the only way we could do that
would be by cutting staff and--
Well, I'm sure you'll do
whatever is necessary, Richard.
Shall we say by, uh, Thursday?
OK, OK, leave it with me.
Uh, I'll look into it, and I'll come
back to you by Thursday afternoon.
What day is it today?
You weren't ready
for the meeting
because you hadn't given yourself
enough time to prepare for the meeting.
So you could only react.
- Ew.
- What?
Reactive management, yuck, but
then you made things even worse.
Joe, what is going on?
Where is everybody?
- They're all here.
- You're three short.
- They're gone, redundancies.
- What?
- Richard Lewis's decision.
- I don't believe it.
Nobody tells me anything
Well, why didn't you tell him?
Well, I was embarrassed because I
ought to have consulted him first.
Oh, I see.
Straight down the stairs, follow your nose.
You can't miss it really.
No, no, please, give me one
more chance, please, please.
Provided you go back and put right
everything that you've done wrong.
Fine, uh, what exactly?
Well, I mean, where
does one begin?
I mean, allowing everyone
else to interrupt you,
getting sidetracked
by irrelevancies,
I mean, doing jobs you don't need to
do, not establishing your priorities.
- Priorities?
- Yes, priorities.
Anything else?
Uh, wasting everyone else's
time as well as your own.
- Such as? - Jane.
- Well, I'm not sure if Jane--
I mean, you fritter your whole day away.
You never have enough time for your staff.
- Well, that's not true.
- Yes, it is!
Well, I'm truly very
sorry, but I meant well.
- Ah.
- I repent.
And I'll be a different person if
I can just have one more chance.
I don't want you to
be a different person.
I want you to be the same
person, but organized.
- I'll try.
- Last chance, all right?
Thank you. Thank you.
You're an angel.
No, I'm not.
I'm a certified saint.
- Oh, you'd better have one of these.
- What is it, a Bible?
No, no, it's the Video Arts pack on
organizing yourself and other people.
We use it up here, you know.
[SCREAMING]
It's all right, everyone.
Panic over, I'm absolutely fine.
Oh, excuse me.
I'd forgotten this.
It's from, uh, well, it's
just-- I brought it with me
in case I woke up during the uh-.
Bye.
- Good morning.
- Good morning, Jane.
I am gonna make a really
organized start today.
Can we work together all day?
Richard, are you
feeling all right?
Fine, fine, yes, I'm the
same person, organized.
I heard you were
taken ill last night.
Oh, yes, yes, it was
nothing, just a heart attack.
- Should you be here?
- Yes, yes, yes, I'll be all right.
Now we have got all sorts
of things to do today.
We must, uh, make sure we've
got hold of Keith's tent,
and I must send that
email off to Dominic.
And, oh, let's get
a hold of Erica
and see how she's getting
on as district manager.
- Where's the mail, by the way?
- Here.
Ah, anything interesting?
I don't know. We haven't
sorted out yesterday's yet.
Right, well, let's due that, uh,
right now as well then-- organized.
Well, here's yesterday's.
Yeah, in fact, here's
the whole pending tray.
God, there must be
weeks of stuff there.
Now I want you to take
that all, go through it,
and throw out anything we've
missed the deadline for.
Then summarize
everything that's vital.
I'm so organized,
it's frightening.
And today's mail, oh, and let's get a
hold of Bernard on the phone right away.
When do you want it
done by, in what order?
Well, I want it all done now.
Don't be such a pain, Jane.
Would you like me to paint the
outside of the building as well?
- What's that supposed to mean?
- Work it out.
Well, that didn't take long, did it?
I should never have let you live.
You're completely hopeless.
- But I was only doing what you--
You can't just throw everything
at her and expect her to cope.
- Oh, that's what she meant.
- Yes.
- But I was delegating.
- That's not delegating.
That's abdicating.
In any case, you can't delegate until
you've got yourself organized.
Why not?
You can't organize other people
if you can't organize yourself.
How do you mean?
I can see I'm gonna have to
start right at the beginning.
[MUSIC PLAYING]