The Spooky Tale of Captain Underpants Hack-a-Ween (2019) - full transcript
When Melvin tries to cancel Halloween, clever best friends Harold and George create their own spooky holiday -- and it's a huge success.
Trick or treat!
This is George Beard
and Harold Hutchins.
George is on the left
with the tie and flattop.
Harold is on the right
with the T-shirt and bad haircut.
Remember that, now,
except George is actually Harold,
and Harold is actually George.
They're dressed that way
because they've always loved Halloween,
a holiday that celebrates creativity
instead of stifling it, like Arbor Day.
Kids, go plant a tree! Gar!
- Isn't Halloween great?
- Werewolf! Run for your lives!
The greatest.
Trick or treat!
Wearing costumes
and getting free candy!
- What could be better?
- Do you mind, bumblebee?
I'm trying to take
a relaxing guacamole bath!
Nothing could be better, that's what.
Trick or treat!
- I wish tomorrow was Halloween, too.
- I wish every day was Halloween.
I'm not a rhino!
I'm a man!
- I think that was a real werewolf.
- Yeah. Solid tackle, too.
♪ So George and Harold make comic books ♪
- ♪ We're cool! ♪
- ♪ Me, too! ♪
♪ But they met a mean old principal
Who told them what to... ♪
♪ So they got a hypno-ring
And first they made him dance ♪
♪ Then accidentally, kinda on purpose
Turned him into Captain Underpants ♪
♪ Tra-la-la ♪
♪ With a snap, he's the Captain
Not the brightest man ♪
♪ And don't forget when he gets wet
You're back where you began ♪
♪ Put it all together
What could possibly go wrong? ♪
♪ This is the end
Of the Captain Underpants song ♪
- ♪ By George Beard and Harold Hutchins ♪
- ♪ Tra-la-ween! ♪
The Heartbreaking Havoc
of the Haunting Hack-A-Ween!
Chapter One: Hallowaiting Game.
One month before Halloween.
Hot chocolate?
Thanks, I needed this.
How long you been up?
Never went to sleep. Too excited.
T-minus four hours
till Hallowarehouse opens.
I love Hallowarehouse.
It's all the best parts of Halloween:
candy, fake skulls,
fake blood, fake eyeballs,
fake Dracula fangs,
fake werewolf claws,
real flashlights, crammed under one roof.
This Halloween,
only Hallowarehouse can save you...
money, because candy corn's on sale!
We're gonna be the first ones in,
which means we'll have our pick
of the best Hallo-wares.
This was the greatest idea we've ever had!
Almost as good as the trick
we played on Melvin last Halloween.
Zombie plumbers?
But I don't wanna be eaten
or have my sink fixed!
Melvin!
Ugh, this fake blood is sticky.
Or the trick we pulled on Melvin
last, last Halloween.
Ghost pool cleaners?
But ghosts are fake
and I don't have a pool!
- Melvin!
- Ha!
Oh, this harness is pinchy.
Or the trick we pulled on Melvin
last, last, last Halloween.
Stay back! Stay back!
There's only one Melvin, and it's me!
- Wrong, you unstable isotope!
- Ha!
Ugh, these glasses are blurry.
Phew, this episode
is flashback-heavy so far.
Sure is. Here's to us, buddy.
Doors open in five, four...
Three, two...
- What do we do?
- Grab some stuff!
- What stuff?
- Any stuff!
Ugh. Aah!
- That was amazing!
- Yep.
That's gonna be a great story
for our grandkids.
Back in my day...
What did you think
of those Skeletorches costumes?
Skeletorches!
We don't even know what they do.
They were fine, but the ones
we're gonna make will be way better.
Hall-No-Ween!
Hall-No-Ween! Hall-No-Ween!
What this side of beef means,
by his inexcusable pun,
is Halloween must be canceled!
What? But you love Halloween!
Wrong! The only thing
I despise more is you two.
Oh, yeah. I must be thinking of Bo.
- Pssh! Halloween can't be canceled.
- No?
That's what you said about Gorilla Lawyer.
Well, that's different.
The gorilla went nuts.
Get off the building, Karl!
Get off the building!
Yeah, Halloween is bulletproof.
Aah, why?
Three weeks before Halloween.
Okay, a lot of Halloween ground to cover,
so let's dive right in.
Good notes on our Skeletorches costumes.
We can dial it back.
Can't unsee that. Can't unsee that.
Gooch, you were undecided
on your costume yesterday.
- Any update?
- Yes. I'm going as a dinosaur.
Sorry, but dinosaur is my thing.
It's the only costume that fits me.
Okay, what about a pirate?
Like, I'm going as a pirate queen.
Sophie One is my parrot,
and, ugh, Other Sophie is, like, scurvyyy.
- Ninja?
- Taken. Smoke bomb.
Don't worry, buddy.
We'll make you a costume.
Okay, but I kind of don't wanna be
traumatized by a costume.
No offense, so I'll just go back
to Hallowarehouse and get a new one.
Those who enter
Hallowarehouse never leave...
empty-handed,
because clown masks are half off.
Quick candy scouting update.
Based on our intel, these houses
are giving out the best candy.
Chocolate Mufflelogs, Sugar Beardies,
and, my favorite, Fruit Swirvel.
Oh, and we got a tip that Mrs. Wrinklefoot
is giving out used gum again,
so stay frosty.
Finally, let's do a quick trick check.
Quick trick check. Qui-Quick trick...
Oh, that's hard to say.
TP, check.
Eggs, chicken and ostrich, check.
Shaving cream, check.
Fake snakes, check.
Sorry, I'm doing fake snakes.
♪ Fake 'n' snake! ♪
Man, I can't catch a break.
Oh, sorry to smash your pumpkins,
you demagnetized magnets,
but Halloween is soon to be Hall-No-Ween!
Another victory for the candy intolerant,
of who I am...
one...
of them.
To be clear, I'm candy intolerant.
- But you love Halloween!
- No!
I told you earlier, in no uncertain terms,
I despise it!
Oh, right. Thinking of Bo again.
It's true. I'm a Halloweeniac.
Not gonna happen, Melvin.
You're the only kid who hates Halloween.
And no one listens to Krupp.
No, I said pizza!
These are socks!
Oh, really? Then where are they going?
- What are our parents doing here?
- And where are they going?
And you can support Hall-No-Ween
by wearing these T-shirts.
The e-mail said free cookies.
At the end. The end!
- Guess someone does listen to Krupp.
- Yeah, but they're adults.
And no one listens to adults.
Two weeks before Halloween.
Skeletorches!
They're skeletons
who are on fire, we think.
Mom, Dad, Halloween's almost here.
Where's the candy?
Ugh, I've been too busy to buy it.
We should get it after Halloween
when it's practically free.
No! We need candy now!
They're trying to cancel Halloween,
and we can't let them win!
- Who's they?
- I am not overpaying for candy!
Mom, Halloween is in trouble,
so I need you to start hanging cobwebs
and stop painting Mr. Meaner.
I can't! He's mesmerizing!
- Mesmerizing.
- I'm a yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah work of art.
One week before Halloween.
Hall-No-Ween signs?
Where are all the Halloween decorations?
No skeletons, no coffins,
no decaying zombies clawing at the dirt,
trying to escape from the grave?
Where's all the fun?
At least Old Man Rattlechains
is getting into it.
Yeah, but his house always looks haunted.
I heard he's a zombie.
I heard he's a zombie-werewolf.
I heard he went to college
with Dracula, borrowed Dracula's car,
and crashed it into the dean's pool,
but that's probably not true.
And don't forget to show up tonight
for the meeting at city hall
on the future of Halloween.
Or should I say "Hall-No-Ween"?
Hey, where did that stop sign come from?
You're a menace.
Your license should be revoked.
Joke's on you. I don't have a license.
- You thinking what I'm thinking?
- Never get in a car with Krupp?
That, and we're going to that meeting.
And the motion to add a tar pit
and dinosaur-friendly benches
to Piqua Park is denied.
Byah!
- Hey, George and Harold.
- Hey, Diddly.
A lot of orange in here.
Yep, and bad orange,
like, biohazard orange.
Next, we'll hear from Principal Krupp
on his motion to...
cancel Halloween?
But why?
- Adults of Piqua...
- That's not a microphone.
You're not a microphone!
For too long, we've suffered the horrors
and inconveniences of Halloween.
It's time to cancel this spine-chilling,
hair-raising, bloodcurdling atrocity.
If we don't, here's what will happen.
Melvin?
A probability algorithm
beyond your comprehension
found there's a 97-percent chance
this simulation is our future
if Halloween continues.
These are the candy mines
where you will all work until you drop.
So, who's with me?
I don't know about all this.
- I kind of like Halloween.
- Oh, do ya?
Do you kind of like buying
a bunch of candy just to give it away?
Well...
Do you kind of like your doorbells
being rung over, and over, and over,
and over, and over, and over, and over,
and over, and over, and over, and over,
- and over, and over, and over, and over?
- No!
Do you like your houses, cars,
and trees covered in eggs,
- shaving cream, and toilet paper?
- No!
Do you like living in fear of the werewolf
who wants to wrap you in a giant tortilla,
fry you, and eat you
like you're a kruppichanga?
You've derailed. Taking over.
The answer is no!
Because today we turn Halloween
into Hall-No-Ween!
Hall-No-Ween! Hall-No-Ween!
Hall-No-Ween!
Hall-No-Ween!
- Wow! I finally started a chant.
- Hall-no-ween! Hall-no-ween!
Hall-No-Ween!
Whoa, Melvin started a chant.
I thought he loved Halloween.
You're thinking of Bo.
And we need to turn this around.
- We just need... our parents!
- I hear ya!
Mom, Dad, Harold's Mom,
you've gotta stop this madness.
Yeah, if they cancel Halloween,
what's next, summer?
I hear you, but I hate doorbells.
And candy is terrible for you.
And Mr. Krupp is right,
that werewolf does want to ichanga us.
Plus, these T-shirts are lovely. Lovely.
All in favor of canceling Halloween,
say "byah"!
Byah!
The byahs have it!
No!
Aah! How?
I can't believe they canceled Halloween.
This is worse than the time
they canceled The Advancimals.
♪ Advancimals ♪
♪ This show is tanking ♪
♪ They're shutting us down ♪
♪ Can you blame them? ♪
To be fair, with all the puns,
toilet humor,
and lazy writing, they had it coming.
Do you mean they had it plumbing?
♪ Advancimals! ♪
No. No, I don't.
We can't save The Advancimals,
but we can still save Halloween.
Can you, now? Can you, really?
Sure. Don't worry, Melvin,
we know how much you love Halloween.
Gah! You're thinking of Bo!
Actually, I was thinking of Gooch.
Except I'm a Saint Paddy's Day guy.
No one wants hear you gloat
in big words today, Melvinedict Arnold.
Understandable, so this time,
I'll do my gloating in song!
♪ Halloween is canceled
And everything's better for me ♪
♪ No sweets to aggravate
My intolerance to candy ♪
♪ No costumes, fake blood
Or trick or treat ♪
♪ No pumpkins, or zombies
Or ghostly sheets ♪
♪ No shaving cream, eggs
Or TP in my trees ♪
♪ 'Cause Halloween is canceled ♪
♪ Yes, Halloween is canceled ♪
♪ And everything's better for me ♪
♪ And also me! ♪
Ow!
Ugh! You ruin everything.
Oh, yeah?
Well... I think I sing
like a parrot.
Oh! I'm stuck!
But that's fine
'cause I can just...
Ah, yah!
We need to make the adults remember
what's great about Halloween,
but they won't listen to us.
Yeah, adults only listen
to other adults... and jazz.
- That's it! That's how we get them!
- A jazz concert?
No, an adult.
Who has the most to lose
if Halloween is canceled?
- Us?
- Besides us.
- Ghosts?
- No. Hallowarehouse.
Hallowarehouse
will be the end of you...
shopping for Halloween stuff,
because we have pre-carved pumpkins.
Pre-smashed, too!
No Halloween means no Hallowarehouse.
So, if we ask the owner of Hallowarehouse
to help us save Halloween, he'll say yes.
Genius! But who's the owner?
You're never gonna believe it.
Chapter Two:
Haunted House Call.
Old Man Rattlechains
owns Hallowarehouse?
Told you you'd never believe it.
It makes sense.
I mean, look at his house.
- I'm not going in there.
- Sure, you are.
That's why Erica's here,
to show you there's nothing to fear.
- There's nothing to fear, except zombies.
- Zombies?
- Just kidding.
- Phew!
Or am I?
Nah, I'm just kidding.
Why so many gates?
And why are they all so creaky?
Halloween, guys.
Eyeball on the prize.
Wolf-howl doorbell. Nice touch.
Yeah, I'd love it if I wasn't so scared.
Wolf-howl door knocker!
Question: why do you love Halloween
if you're afraid of it?
Because Halloween makes fear fun!
Aah!
- Seriously, all these hinges need oil.
- Not now, Harold!
Yes?
Oh, sorry.
Forgot I was wearing this costume.
Forgot about the mask, too.
Apologies.
I test-wear every costume we carry
at Hallowarehouse!
So, you're Old Man Rattlechains?
Call me Creeply.
Your name is Creeply Rattlechains?
A name like that doesn't leave you
a lot of options.
Well, it was either
Halloween store or magician.
So, um, yeah. Come on in.
This is not what I expected at all.
Yeah, it's nice, Home Snob nice.
Coming up on Home Snob...
Like this house? Too bad!
You can't afford it.
Why doesn't the inside
look like the outside?
The haunted house vibe scares people away
better than an alarm system.
Plus, I love Halloween.
Or I did until those Hall-No-Weenies
canceled it.
That's why we're here,
to convince you to help us
convince them to uncancel it.
Yes!
And when we're done,
they'll beg for murder!
I mean mercy!
- Why are you yelling?
- Guys, you heard Krupp.
Halloween is nothing but work for adults.
Candy, decorations, jack-o'- lanterns,
costumes, trick-or-treaters, pranks,
and a big mess to clean up when it's over.
Yeah, but adults like work.
And some adults love Halloween,
especially if they own Halloween stores.
No, she's right.
So, we have to remind all adults
why they loved Halloween
before they became adults
by scaring their pants off
with a haunted house.
Yes! Because skeletons
plus fear equals love.
- Not so sure about that math.
- I am.
That's why I opened Hallowarehouse.
Fear is a blast! Yeah!
Glad you feel that way,
'cause we're gonna make the inside
of your house match the outside.
What's that, now?
Chapter Three:
The Scarent Trap.
To lure adults
into the haunted house,
the boys dangled the one carrot
no adult could resist.
Uh, do you think they're really
giving away free batteries here?
I don't know, but for free batteries,
it's worth the risk.
Not for me. I'm waiting outside.
No, you're coming in.
That's why Erica's here,
to convince you there's nothing to fear.
There's nothing to fear...
except werewolves.
Werewolves?
This is the way to free batteries.
There's plenty of tomb! I mean room!
Why is he yelling?
It's so spooky in here!
And I do not see any free batteries.
Boo!
See? I told you this was a mistake.
That was amazing!
It was even better than the haunted house
I went to when I was ten! When I was ten.
So good! So good.
Halloween's awesome!
You need to sign this petition
to uncancel it.
Boys, what are you doing in here?
Forget it! I hate being scared!
- Can we go again?
- Sure. Just sign this petition.
- I knew this would work.
- Yep. It's in the Halloween bag.
I want double-As, Cs and nine-volts,
lots of nine-volts!
Your free batteries are right in-died!
I mean inside! Inside!
Why are you yelling?
Hello, robed stranger.
Will you sign our petition
to uncancel Halloween?
No! Instead, I've turned
your fake haunted house
into a real nightmare
with my Inanimanitator 2000!
It animates the inanimate.
- It brings lifeless objects to life.
- You mean like string, or socks?
Or a comb, or ham, or volleyballs?
Yes, all those things!
And now, when your
living Halloween decorations
scare the adults to death,
it will be the death of Halloween forever!
Evil laugh!
Eh, how bad could it be?
Ow! Uh! Ow!
Bad. We need Captain Underpants.
Aah! Bones!
Save me from the bones!
- Great timing.
- Save yourself.
♪ Tra-la-leg bone! ♪
Looks like he's got a bone
to pick with me, am I right?
So good. Now fight him!
Right. I'll be bad to the bones.
You're on a roll, but we gotta
keep the show moving, so...
So I'll keep it bare bones.
Still rolling!
Chapter Four: The Incredibly
Graphic Violence Chapter,
presented in Hall-O-Rama,
because Halloween is ending with a boo,
courtesy of Hallowarehouse
Hallo-well-that's-it sale.
Everything must go!
Like fake eyeballs.
Oh! An eye for an eye!
Ten for a buck!
And Shrillows, the pillows that scream!
Oh! I'll never sleep again!
Help yourself. No charge.
And Bubble Bats.
They're just bats you put in the bath.
Ugh, I don't wanna be squeaky clean!
We'll pay you to take them! Please!
Captain Underpants for the Hall-o-win!
Uh, not quite.
How are we gonna stop this stuff?
Piece of snake!
Looks like you're up to bat.
I don't think that closet
can hold those decorations.
And it's too small to be practical.
That's why it's time
for a waistband wall-off!
Stand back!
Ooh! Wolf-howl knocker!
Whoo!
Captain Underpants for the Hall-o-win!
- You already used that one.
- Or did I?
Captain Underpants for the Hall-o-win!
That's not me.
Oh! I'm late for a foot massage!
Why am I wet? Where are my pants?
George and Harold,
this time you've done it!
My house
is wrapped in underwear.
Yeah, really sorry about that.
Good news is we got a bunch of signatures
to uncancel Halloween.
Great!
My house and all my worldly possessions
are a small price to pay for that.
Let's go celebrate!
Just need to do one thing first.
See? So much better.
I don't believe it.
All I had to do was oil the hinges?
Huh, who knew?
Everyone. Now let's celebrate.
Yes, let's celebrate my victory.
Your haywire haunted house
has sealed Halloween's fate forever!
We took another vote,
and Halloween is no longer canceled.
- Yes!
- Harold, there's probably more.
There is, you kinked garden hoses.
Halloween is now... illegal!
No!
Officers, arrest those pumpkins!
Chapter Five: Thrillegal.
A $500 fine for carving a pumpkin?
And 1,000 for wearing a costume?
And up to six months in jail
for trick-arrr-treating!
♪ Incarceration! ♪
I wanna do the crime,
but I can't do the time!
Sophie One, get ready to throw
Other Sophie under the bus.
Other Sophie, get ready to go to jaaail.
I guess that's it.
Halloween is officially history.
History? Let's talk about history.
When the Vikings told Columbus
America didn't exist, did he quit?
No! Columbus got on his dragon
and flew until he found America.
Did the Romans give up when
they had nowhere to go to the bathroom?
Nope! Flushus Bowlicus
invented the toilet, and problem solved.
And when the aliens closed space,
did the astronauts pack it up?
No way! The astronauts took
the aliens' rocket for a space joyride.
Not a single thing you just said was true.
Yeah, we don't know history.
- But you're right.
- But we do know Halloween.
So when the adults say
Halloween is illegal, what do we say?
Hall-No-Way! Hall-No-Way!
Hall-No-Way!
Hall-No-Way!
- So, you have a plan?
- I always have a plan.
Coming to the Hall-No-Ween victory party?
Someone might bring cheese.
No, you empty salt shaker.
George and Harold love Halloween
as much as I love DNA Day.
DNA all the way!
Hey!
The Hall-o-war is not over!
'Kay, more cheese for me.
Cheese!
I don't have a plan. I don't even have
a cool name like Skeletorches.
Skeletorches!
They like tea, sure!
- Time for a comic?
- Comic it is.
Captain Underpants
and the Huffy Holihater!
By George and Harold.
So, one time, Holihater,
a bad guy and boring dresser
who hated holidays,
used a Holiray to vaporize
all the town's Halloween stuff.
Candy, berzap!
Overpriced pumpkins, kergok!
Even inflatable owls, for what?
And he was all, "Anyone who says
'Halloween' gets vaporized, too!"
That threw a wrench
into Captain Underpants's Halloween party.
But his party pal Tony was all like,
"Just hack it, man.
Lose the H." 'Cause Tony.
So, Cap Captain Underpants
hacked his Halloween party
into a no-H All-o-ween party.
"Wow, so smart!" "Really?"
Everyone showed up with whatever:
pillows, drywall, tires,
a roller skate, you name it.
And instead of Halloween costumes like
Dracula, Frankenstein, and the mummy,
people dressed as Doctorca,
an orca who went to med school;
and Scorpionion, half scorpion,
half onion, all monster;
and Frobra, a frozen cobra!
'Cause All-o-ween, no H,
was the Wild West of holidays
with fewer cowboy hats and horse cars.
But when people posted pictures online,
due to low self-esteem,
Holihater saw them
and crashed the party to shut it down.
And Captain Underpants
was all, "Party foul!"
And he dunked Holihater
in Tony's mystery punch,
which was just lemonade,
pickle juice, and ketchup,
'cause Tony, agh!
And Holihater was all,
"Ugh, too pickle-y! I give up!"
Turns out Holihater only hated holidays
because he was never invited to parties.
So Captain Underpants gave a toast,
"To a holigreat guy!"
And everyone got pucker face
from the punch.
Then the cops showed up
'cause there were noise complaints.
"Too loud!" Okay, the end.
- So, we're gonna hack Halloween?
- You mean Hack-A-Ween.
One day before Halloween.
I mean Hack-A-Ween.
We did it! Halloween is finished!
Tomorrow night there'll be no costumes,
no candy, and no doorbells.
Just peace and quiet
and a bathtub full of guacamole.
To Hall-No-Ween and cheese!
We should have a victory party.
Tomorrow night!
What? This is the victory party.
What if we all have victory parties
tomorrow night?
No, no, no! It's tonight.
We have cheese!
Ooh! And we can all go door to door
to each party.
Byah! Byah!
And we should wear costumes!
Costumes.
And give out
yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah candy!
- And hang skeletons in the trees.
- And fight the toilet zombies.
No. No! That's Halloween!
We want Hall-No-Ween!
Oh, no!
No, the cheese!
Oh, no!
No!
Chapter Six:
Tween Ween Fighting Machine.
It's called Hack-A-Ween.
- It's a complete reinvention of Halloween.
- As this helpful video will explain.
Welcome
to Hack-A-Ween Orientation.
Courtesy
of Treehouse Comix Productions.
Like Halloween,
but don't want to get arrested?
Then Hack-A-Ween,
a legally acceptable workaround
to the Halloween ban, is for you.
Not yet, Gooch. Too soon.
- Instead of costumes...
- Disguises!
- They're the same thing.
- Not if we say they aren't.
Gooch, what are you doing?
- Instead of trick-or-treating for candy...
- Sneak-or-snacking for snacks.
- Here are some nachos.
- ♪ Snacky! ♪
Now stay out of my garage,
you whippersnappers.
♪ Sneaky! ♪
Gooch!
Instead of Halloween monsters,
like Dracula, Frankenstein,
and a werewolf...
New Hack-A-Ween personalities
like Doctorca, Scorpionion, and Frobra.
Gooch, this is your scene.
I'm Frobra!
- Want hypothermia?
- Frostbite! Want frostbite!
And that's Hack-A-Ween.
Yes, we know. We're in the video.
- I like Frobra.
- Because it's you.
We'll post this video online
to get the other kids on board.
Now we just need Hack-A-Ween supplies.
Which won't be easy
because Krupp and Melvin
were collecting all things Halloween
for disposal.
- Feeling better now, Sneedly?
- Yes.
George and Harold can't revive Halloween
if there's nothing left to revive.
♪ Plastic glowing skulls ♪
♪ Fake blood that's half full ♪
♪ Masks and wigs and claws and fangs ♪
♪ And bats and way too many evil clowns ♪
Oh, who are you calling evil? Ha!
- Now we just need to burn it.
- Right.
Wait, burn it? We can't burn it!
That pile is mostly cheap plastic.
It'll go up like a...
Our eyebrows will grow back.
Fortunately, George and Harold
found some Hallowiggle room.
"Hackawarehouse."
I like it.
- You sure this won't get me arrested?
- Sure enough.
And if you go down,
we're all going down with you.
I'll call my lawyer.
Uh, sir, forklifts aren't allowed
in Avocadepot.
Too late, it's done.
I'm whipping up a guacamole bath.
A guaca-bath!
A bath-mole!
Still working on the name.
Point is, this is a code green
and I need all the avocados.
- Uh, sir, we deliver!
- Really?
Great, 'cause I don't know
how to drive this thing.
Aah!
Every kid in Piqua
saw the Hack-A-Ween video.
Ugh! I knew George and Harold
were up to something.
- Including Melvin.
- Hack-A-Ween!
They may have found a loophole
in Hall-No-Ween,
but I'll make them wish they hadn't!
Melvin?
We're worried about how much time
you spend without any friends.
Uh, so we arranged a playdate
with one of your little classmates.
I'm here because my mom
gave me five dollars.
Hack-A-Ween Day.
Ready for Hack-A-Ween, Deputy Drawers?
Hangin' loose and sippin' juice,
Lieutenant Long Johns.
Who are you again?
We're expanding
the Captain Underpants universe.
So we're in very un-Halloweeny
spin-off disguises.
- You?
- I'm the junior senator from Mars.
Like, I'm Dr. Braincrime,
head of Weirdo Penitentiary.
Sophie One is Warden Frownface
and Other Sophie is, like,
our most dangerous prisoner,
Noiseless Nancyyy.
You sure these costumes
won't land us in jail?
They're not costumes.
They're disguises, remember?
I checked with Underneath The Law.
We're good.
Youse got legal troubles?
I got you covered, chief.
I'm a plumber.
Yeah, that legal advice
is as solid as a copper pipe.
And those are fantastic Doctorca,
Scorpionion, and Frobra disguises.
- ♪ Frobra! ♪
- But I'm Frobra!
Hey, why did you guys need me
to harvest all my pit cabbages?
Well, jack-o'- lanterns are illegal,
but hack-o'- lanterns aren't.
How are the hack-o'- lanterns coming,
Mr. Rattlechains?
Good, but cabbages are harder
to carve than pumpkins,
so I also have enough coleslaw
to choke a rhino.
Perfect. Guys, let's hack it up.
Wait! I have a surprise for you.
Called in some favors
from my inflatables guys.
Happy Hack-A-Ween!
Whoa!
- It's Doctorca!
- And Scorpionion!
♪ And me! ♪
No, I'm Frobra! Me!
This is the most beautiful sight
these eyes have ever seen.
These eyes, too.
Thanks, Mr. Rattlechains.
Okay, Hack-A-Weeners,
let's get out there and let
the tortilla chips fall where they may.
Yeah, into our bags
with pizza rolls and tater tots!
Chapter Seven: Big Hack Attack.
No doorbells, remember?
Hack-A-Ween.
Right. And if we get arrested,
I hope we get an ocean-view cell.
Oh, sorry, toilet reflexes.
What's up?
- Sneak or snack!
- What is that?
Like, trick or treat?
I thought Halloween was outlawed.
It was, but this is Hack-A-Ween,
a legally sound alternative
according to Underneath the Law.
Sneak or snack means you give us a snack
or we do something sneaky.
You guys like turkey jerky?
Melvin's house.
Maybe we should skip it.
As they say, you mess with the Melvin,
you get the beakers.
If you skip a house on a Halloween,
you might miss something good.
Same deal for Hack-A-Ween.
- Sneak or...
- This is worse than Halloween!
...snack.
I'm starting to think
Melvin hates Halloween.
Happy Hack-A-Ween!
- ♪ Sneak or snack! ♪
- And nice disguise.
What disguise?
Like, give us snacks, or we let
Noiseless Nancy make some noooise.
I just made tuna casserole.
Where's the yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-
yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah fire?
Happy Hack-A-Ween!
♪ Sneak or snack! ♪
Sneak, it is.
Just some more kids in disguises
begging for food.
Speaking of food, I could really go
for a yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah burrito.
Not now. Not now.
We're in the zone.
But I need more paint, so don't move.
- Sneak.
- Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah hello?
- Sneak!
- Aah! Who yeah-yeah-yeah said that?
- We said sneak or snack.
- You chose wrong.
- What's all that screaming?
- Mom!
Seriously?
You've gotta stop painting this guy.
I can't!
He's my muse. My muse.
I'm her muuuse.
So, you got any snacks?
Ah, guaca-bath-ole.
Relaxation is served.
Huh.
Probably just a boat.
Or a goose fight.
Or the big game.
- Happy Hack-A-Ween!
- Hey, those aren't fighting gooses!
- ♪ Sneak or snack! ♪
- No, it can't be.
Halloween is illegal. Illegal! Ow!
Mm! These stuffed mushrooms are sublime.
- Wait until you try the shrimp toast.
- Aah!
Happy Hack-A-Ween?
You!
Sneak or sna...
Happy Hack-A-Ween!
Who wants popcorn shrimp? Oh!
Hello, Mr. Krupp.
Uh, why are you green?
Because I was in the middle
of a relaxing guaca-bath-ole
when I was interrupted
by these two Halloween hoodlums!
- Arrest them!
- For what?
For Halloweening!
It's against the law!
True, but they're celebrating Hack-A-Ween.
That's perfectly legal.
I checked Underneath The Law.
Underneath the Law: if you
can read, you can give legal advice.
Hack-A-Ween? Yeah, that's legal.
I clean pools.
And frankly, Hack-A-Ween's a hoot-a-ween!
Finger food! Byah, byah!
Ooh, now I gotta fry up some fish sticks
before kids sneak into my basement.
This isn't over. You're gonna slip up.
And when you do, I'll be there
to bring the law down on your heads,
just like that!
Like...
♪ Tra-la-lobster roll! ♪
Cool disguises, guys.
Let me guess, you're a kayak
and you're an active volcano.
No, we're spin-offs.
- I'm...
- Don't bother. He's disguise-blind.
Who am I?
- So, where'd you get all the grub?
- From sneak-or-snacking.
- It's like trick-or-treating, but...
- Oh, I got it!
♪ Tra-la-lettuce wraps! ♪
Sneak or snack!
- He doesn't got it.
- No, but we got it, buddy.
- We saved Halloween with Hack-A-Ween.
- Yep. Everybody's happy.
- Back, Hack-A-Ween horde!
- Everybody except Melvin.
Or be bathed in hot chili.
Mother, more chili!
Hack-A-Ween tanked his Hall-No-Ween plans.
I wonder why Melvin turned on Halloween.
He had a blast trick-or-treating
with us all last year.
Trick or treat!
- He didn't go with us.
- The year before that?
- Trick or treat!
- Nope. No Melvin then either.
Has Melvin ever been
trick-or-treating with us?
That's why Melvin hates Halloween.
- Just like Holihater in our comic!
- ♪ Callback! ♪
Chapter Eight: Melvinvitation.
Yeah, yeah, sneak or snack!
Take your pigs in a blanket
and stay out of our guest bathroom!
Oh, it's you two.
Here to gloat?
Well, enjoy your victory while it lasts.
Actually, we're here to see
if you wanna join us.
Yeah, grab a disguise
and come sneak-or-snacking.
Oh, sure!
And then you'll turn into vampire cops
and arrest me for not having a neck!
I'm no fool! I know your tricks!
No tricks. They're illegal.
More importantly...
we want you to come.
- What?
- Yeah, you can be a spin-off just like us!
Your name is...
Melvinhaler!
And you have the power
to, uh, breathe easy.
You just need a cape.
- You're... You're giving me your cape?
- Sure.
That's what Hack-A-Ween's all about,
mending bridges.
It's... It's mending fences.
And it's a very gracious offer.
I just wish you made it 38 minutes ago.
Why? What happened 38 minutes ago?
What's that noise?
- Noise? I don't hear a noise.
- Melvin, what did you do?
Nothing. Let's go.
Which house shall we visit first?
Melvin, what did you do?
Me? Do?
- What?
- Melvin!
Okay, I was angry. I wanted revenge.
How was I to know
you'd come and mend bridges?
Wait, is it bridges or fences?
Harold, look!
Oh, no!
He hacked Hack-A-Ween!
Melvin, whatever you did, un-did it!
Look, I can't!
Bringing those inflatables to life
fried the Inanimanitator!
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry!
We don't need sorry.
We need Captain Underpants.
But we're still going
sneak-or-snacking together, right?
Aah! Guys?
Guys, that house down the street
is giving out aluminum siding.
Mm!
Aluminuminummy!
Hey, big balloon guys!
I gotta get a picture with them
for my album.
Those aren't nice balloons.
They're messed-up Hack-A-Ween balloons.
And that means no more sneak-or-snacking.
Nuh-uh!
No one gets between me and my siding.
Time to blow up some blow-ups.
So, shall we...
sneak... or snack?
♪ Tra-la-la! ♪
Chapter Nine: The Second
Incredibly Graphic Violence Chapter,
presented in Horror-O-Rama,
because something that fun to say
can't be violent or scary.
Horror-O-Rama!
Horror-O-Rama!
I'm walking in the woods, alone, at night.
Seems safe to me.
Forest for the Screams.
In theaters this Hack-A-Ween.
I'm showering in my underwear.
What could go wrong?
The Final Shower.
In theaters this Hack-A-Ween.
I'm lost in an abandoned prison.
Now, this was a bad call.
Don't Go
Into That Abandoned Prison.
In theaters this Hack-A-Ween.
Knocked...
...the wind...
...out of me!
Can't breathe!
Can't breathe? That's a job for...
Melvinhaler! Melvin, he's got the need!
Yes! Uh, yes! I am Melvinhaler!
And by the power of bronchial dilators,
I will open your airways,
expand your troubled lungs,
and end wheezing!
Whoa, that needs work.
Thanks for the air, nerdy bear!
- Now, how do I let the air out of them?
- You don't.
Lieutenant Long Johns
and Deputy Drawers do!
Courtesy of Mrs. Wrinklefoot,
who really stepped it up for Hack-A-Ween.
But how do we get into kabob range?
Captain Underpants,
can you create a distraction
so we can get close enough
to burst those bubbles?
I'm all distraction... and cheese!
♪ Tra-la-lamb kabobs! ♪
The bounce stops here...
Ow! Whoa! Ow!
I can't pop them!
So let 'em pop themselves!
Can you bounce back from bouncing?
Spin-offs for the Hack-a-win!
- Help!
- Help!
Whoa, you're like a rubber wall!
I have those in my room.
Time to pull out all the pops.
Whoa!
Kabobs!
Why am I wet? Where are my pants?
- Boom! We Hack-a-won!
- Yeah!
Good thing this isn't one of those movies
where you think it's over, but it's not.
Uh, anyone seen my house?
It's missing.
- Found it.
- But how is it moving?
Well...
I may have blasted the house
with the Inanimanitator
to bring it to life.
I...
What? I was angry!
Time for round two, Cap U!
Don't snap at me! I'm not a bird!
He's still wet. We're on our own.
We lost Halloween.
We can't lose Hack-A-Ween!
Yes! We must save Hack-A-Ween
because I'm having fun now, so it matters!
Don't worry,
nothing three spin-offs can't handle.
I-I'm sorry, did you say three?
The Spinoffs!
Starring Lieutenant Long Johns
and Deputy Drawers and Melvinhaler!
By George and Harold.
Sooooo, Halloween so!
The Spinoffs do what you always do
when your house is crawling with life...
they called an exterminator.
Lieutenant Long Johns
and Deputy Drawers kept the house busy
with a heroic game
of ding dong ditch, ding dong!
While Melvinhaler took
a deep, cleansing breath
and turned the exterminator's tent
into the Nonexistent 2000.
Pssh-kank-sqwork Nonexistent!
The Nonexistent convinced
the stuff in the house
it wasn't alive anymore,
and problem solved!
Spinoffs!
Gosh, good thing exterminators
take care of monster houses.
- So, when can I move back in?
- Not for a year, at least.
A bill? Seriously?
And while Hack-A-Ween wasn't perfect,
it was the perfect reminder
that all kids love Halloween.
- I feel like candy!
- Mm, mm, mm!
Even if they are adults.
- Candy rules!
- Mm, mm, mm. At any price!
And these costumes are inspiring!
- So good.
- I love being someone else.
Are you a yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah mirror?
So, all in favor
of bringing back Halloween?
Byah!
The byahs have it!
- Halloween is reinstated!
- Aah!
- Double byah! Byah!
- No! No!
Hey, look!
"Halloween meeting tonight.
Bring your own snacks."
"Halloween is back!
Get your ghost on."
Ugh, sorry, Melvin.
Oh, don't be.
I'm not really candy intolerant.
That was just an excuse I used to minimize
the unpleasantness of Halloween.
I actually enjoy candy. Watch.
See? I'm totally fi...
I'm so sick!
Happy Hack-A-Ween!
This is George Beard
and Harold Hutchins.
George is on the left
with the tie and flattop.
Harold is on the right
with the T-shirt and bad haircut.
Remember that, now,
except George is actually Harold,
and Harold is actually George.
They're dressed that way
because they've always loved Halloween,
a holiday that celebrates creativity
instead of stifling it, like Arbor Day.
Kids, go plant a tree! Gar!
- Isn't Halloween great?
- Werewolf! Run for your lives!
The greatest.
Trick or treat!
Wearing costumes
and getting free candy!
- What could be better?
- Do you mind, bumblebee?
I'm trying to take
a relaxing guacamole bath!
Nothing could be better, that's what.
Trick or treat!
- I wish tomorrow was Halloween, too.
- I wish every day was Halloween.
I'm not a rhino!
I'm a man!
- I think that was a real werewolf.
- Yeah. Solid tackle, too.
♪ So George and Harold make comic books ♪
- ♪ We're cool! ♪
- ♪ Me, too! ♪
♪ But they met a mean old principal
Who told them what to... ♪
♪ So they got a hypno-ring
And first they made him dance ♪
♪ Then accidentally, kinda on purpose
Turned him into Captain Underpants ♪
♪ Tra-la-la ♪
♪ With a snap, he's the Captain
Not the brightest man ♪
♪ And don't forget when he gets wet
You're back where you began ♪
♪ Put it all together
What could possibly go wrong? ♪
♪ This is the end
Of the Captain Underpants song ♪
- ♪ By George Beard and Harold Hutchins ♪
- ♪ Tra-la-ween! ♪
The Heartbreaking Havoc
of the Haunting Hack-A-Ween!
Chapter One: Hallowaiting Game.
One month before Halloween.
Hot chocolate?
Thanks, I needed this.
How long you been up?
Never went to sleep. Too excited.
T-minus four hours
till Hallowarehouse opens.
I love Hallowarehouse.
It's all the best parts of Halloween:
candy, fake skulls,
fake blood, fake eyeballs,
fake Dracula fangs,
fake werewolf claws,
real flashlights, crammed under one roof.
This Halloween,
only Hallowarehouse can save you...
money, because candy corn's on sale!
We're gonna be the first ones in,
which means we'll have our pick
of the best Hallo-wares.
This was the greatest idea we've ever had!
Almost as good as the trick
we played on Melvin last Halloween.
Zombie plumbers?
But I don't wanna be eaten
or have my sink fixed!
Melvin!
Ugh, this fake blood is sticky.
Or the trick we pulled on Melvin
last, last Halloween.
Ghost pool cleaners?
But ghosts are fake
and I don't have a pool!
- Melvin!
- Ha!
Oh, this harness is pinchy.
Or the trick we pulled on Melvin
last, last, last Halloween.
Stay back! Stay back!
There's only one Melvin, and it's me!
- Wrong, you unstable isotope!
- Ha!
Ugh, these glasses are blurry.
Phew, this episode
is flashback-heavy so far.
Sure is. Here's to us, buddy.
Doors open in five, four...
Three, two...
- What do we do?
- Grab some stuff!
- What stuff?
- Any stuff!
Ugh. Aah!
- That was amazing!
- Yep.
That's gonna be a great story
for our grandkids.
Back in my day...
What did you think
of those Skeletorches costumes?
Skeletorches!
We don't even know what they do.
They were fine, but the ones
we're gonna make will be way better.
Hall-No-Ween!
Hall-No-Ween! Hall-No-Ween!
What this side of beef means,
by his inexcusable pun,
is Halloween must be canceled!
What? But you love Halloween!
Wrong! The only thing
I despise more is you two.
Oh, yeah. I must be thinking of Bo.
- Pssh! Halloween can't be canceled.
- No?
That's what you said about Gorilla Lawyer.
Well, that's different.
The gorilla went nuts.
Get off the building, Karl!
Get off the building!
Yeah, Halloween is bulletproof.
Aah, why?
Three weeks before Halloween.
Okay, a lot of Halloween ground to cover,
so let's dive right in.
Good notes on our Skeletorches costumes.
We can dial it back.
Can't unsee that. Can't unsee that.
Gooch, you were undecided
on your costume yesterday.
- Any update?
- Yes. I'm going as a dinosaur.
Sorry, but dinosaur is my thing.
It's the only costume that fits me.
Okay, what about a pirate?
Like, I'm going as a pirate queen.
Sophie One is my parrot,
and, ugh, Other Sophie is, like, scurvyyy.
- Ninja?
- Taken. Smoke bomb.
Don't worry, buddy.
We'll make you a costume.
Okay, but I kind of don't wanna be
traumatized by a costume.
No offense, so I'll just go back
to Hallowarehouse and get a new one.
Those who enter
Hallowarehouse never leave...
empty-handed,
because clown masks are half off.
Quick candy scouting update.
Based on our intel, these houses
are giving out the best candy.
Chocolate Mufflelogs, Sugar Beardies,
and, my favorite, Fruit Swirvel.
Oh, and we got a tip that Mrs. Wrinklefoot
is giving out used gum again,
so stay frosty.
Finally, let's do a quick trick check.
Quick trick check. Qui-Quick trick...
Oh, that's hard to say.
TP, check.
Eggs, chicken and ostrich, check.
Shaving cream, check.
Fake snakes, check.
Sorry, I'm doing fake snakes.
♪ Fake 'n' snake! ♪
Man, I can't catch a break.
Oh, sorry to smash your pumpkins,
you demagnetized magnets,
but Halloween is soon to be Hall-No-Ween!
Another victory for the candy intolerant,
of who I am...
one...
of them.
To be clear, I'm candy intolerant.
- But you love Halloween!
- No!
I told you earlier, in no uncertain terms,
I despise it!
Oh, right. Thinking of Bo again.
It's true. I'm a Halloweeniac.
Not gonna happen, Melvin.
You're the only kid who hates Halloween.
And no one listens to Krupp.
No, I said pizza!
These are socks!
Oh, really? Then where are they going?
- What are our parents doing here?
- And where are they going?
And you can support Hall-No-Ween
by wearing these T-shirts.
The e-mail said free cookies.
At the end. The end!
- Guess someone does listen to Krupp.
- Yeah, but they're adults.
And no one listens to adults.
Two weeks before Halloween.
Skeletorches!
They're skeletons
who are on fire, we think.
Mom, Dad, Halloween's almost here.
Where's the candy?
Ugh, I've been too busy to buy it.
We should get it after Halloween
when it's practically free.
No! We need candy now!
They're trying to cancel Halloween,
and we can't let them win!
- Who's they?
- I am not overpaying for candy!
Mom, Halloween is in trouble,
so I need you to start hanging cobwebs
and stop painting Mr. Meaner.
I can't! He's mesmerizing!
- Mesmerizing.
- I'm a yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah work of art.
One week before Halloween.
Hall-No-Ween signs?
Where are all the Halloween decorations?
No skeletons, no coffins,
no decaying zombies clawing at the dirt,
trying to escape from the grave?
Where's all the fun?
At least Old Man Rattlechains
is getting into it.
Yeah, but his house always looks haunted.
I heard he's a zombie.
I heard he's a zombie-werewolf.
I heard he went to college
with Dracula, borrowed Dracula's car,
and crashed it into the dean's pool,
but that's probably not true.
And don't forget to show up tonight
for the meeting at city hall
on the future of Halloween.
Or should I say "Hall-No-Ween"?
Hey, where did that stop sign come from?
You're a menace.
Your license should be revoked.
Joke's on you. I don't have a license.
- You thinking what I'm thinking?
- Never get in a car with Krupp?
That, and we're going to that meeting.
And the motion to add a tar pit
and dinosaur-friendly benches
to Piqua Park is denied.
Byah!
- Hey, George and Harold.
- Hey, Diddly.
A lot of orange in here.
Yep, and bad orange,
like, biohazard orange.
Next, we'll hear from Principal Krupp
on his motion to...
cancel Halloween?
But why?
- Adults of Piqua...
- That's not a microphone.
You're not a microphone!
For too long, we've suffered the horrors
and inconveniences of Halloween.
It's time to cancel this spine-chilling,
hair-raising, bloodcurdling atrocity.
If we don't, here's what will happen.
Melvin?
A probability algorithm
beyond your comprehension
found there's a 97-percent chance
this simulation is our future
if Halloween continues.
These are the candy mines
where you will all work until you drop.
So, who's with me?
I don't know about all this.
- I kind of like Halloween.
- Oh, do ya?
Do you kind of like buying
a bunch of candy just to give it away?
Well...
Do you kind of like your doorbells
being rung over, and over, and over,
and over, and over, and over, and over,
and over, and over, and over, and over,
- and over, and over, and over, and over?
- No!
Do you like your houses, cars,
and trees covered in eggs,
- shaving cream, and toilet paper?
- No!
Do you like living in fear of the werewolf
who wants to wrap you in a giant tortilla,
fry you, and eat you
like you're a kruppichanga?
You've derailed. Taking over.
The answer is no!
Because today we turn Halloween
into Hall-No-Ween!
Hall-No-Ween! Hall-No-Ween!
Hall-No-Ween!
Hall-No-Ween!
- Wow! I finally started a chant.
- Hall-no-ween! Hall-no-ween!
Hall-No-Ween!
Whoa, Melvin started a chant.
I thought he loved Halloween.
You're thinking of Bo.
And we need to turn this around.
- We just need... our parents!
- I hear ya!
Mom, Dad, Harold's Mom,
you've gotta stop this madness.
Yeah, if they cancel Halloween,
what's next, summer?
I hear you, but I hate doorbells.
And candy is terrible for you.
And Mr. Krupp is right,
that werewolf does want to ichanga us.
Plus, these T-shirts are lovely. Lovely.
All in favor of canceling Halloween,
say "byah"!
Byah!
The byahs have it!
No!
Aah! How?
I can't believe they canceled Halloween.
This is worse than the time
they canceled The Advancimals.
♪ Advancimals ♪
♪ This show is tanking ♪
♪ They're shutting us down ♪
♪ Can you blame them? ♪
To be fair, with all the puns,
toilet humor,
and lazy writing, they had it coming.
Do you mean they had it plumbing?
♪ Advancimals! ♪
No. No, I don't.
We can't save The Advancimals,
but we can still save Halloween.
Can you, now? Can you, really?
Sure. Don't worry, Melvin,
we know how much you love Halloween.
Gah! You're thinking of Bo!
Actually, I was thinking of Gooch.
Except I'm a Saint Paddy's Day guy.
No one wants hear you gloat
in big words today, Melvinedict Arnold.
Understandable, so this time,
I'll do my gloating in song!
♪ Halloween is canceled
And everything's better for me ♪
♪ No sweets to aggravate
My intolerance to candy ♪
♪ No costumes, fake blood
Or trick or treat ♪
♪ No pumpkins, or zombies
Or ghostly sheets ♪
♪ No shaving cream, eggs
Or TP in my trees ♪
♪ 'Cause Halloween is canceled ♪
♪ Yes, Halloween is canceled ♪
♪ And everything's better for me ♪
♪ And also me! ♪
Ow!
Ugh! You ruin everything.
Oh, yeah?
Well... I think I sing
like a parrot.
Oh! I'm stuck!
But that's fine
'cause I can just...
Ah, yah!
We need to make the adults remember
what's great about Halloween,
but they won't listen to us.
Yeah, adults only listen
to other adults... and jazz.
- That's it! That's how we get them!
- A jazz concert?
No, an adult.
Who has the most to lose
if Halloween is canceled?
- Us?
- Besides us.
- Ghosts?
- No. Hallowarehouse.
Hallowarehouse
will be the end of you...
shopping for Halloween stuff,
because we have pre-carved pumpkins.
Pre-smashed, too!
No Halloween means no Hallowarehouse.
So, if we ask the owner of Hallowarehouse
to help us save Halloween, he'll say yes.
Genius! But who's the owner?
You're never gonna believe it.
Chapter Two:
Haunted House Call.
Old Man Rattlechains
owns Hallowarehouse?
Told you you'd never believe it.
It makes sense.
I mean, look at his house.
- I'm not going in there.
- Sure, you are.
That's why Erica's here,
to show you there's nothing to fear.
- There's nothing to fear, except zombies.
- Zombies?
- Just kidding.
- Phew!
Or am I?
Nah, I'm just kidding.
Why so many gates?
And why are they all so creaky?
Halloween, guys.
Eyeball on the prize.
Wolf-howl doorbell. Nice touch.
Yeah, I'd love it if I wasn't so scared.
Wolf-howl door knocker!
Question: why do you love Halloween
if you're afraid of it?
Because Halloween makes fear fun!
Aah!
- Seriously, all these hinges need oil.
- Not now, Harold!
Yes?
Oh, sorry.
Forgot I was wearing this costume.
Forgot about the mask, too.
Apologies.
I test-wear every costume we carry
at Hallowarehouse!
So, you're Old Man Rattlechains?
Call me Creeply.
Your name is Creeply Rattlechains?
A name like that doesn't leave you
a lot of options.
Well, it was either
Halloween store or magician.
So, um, yeah. Come on in.
This is not what I expected at all.
Yeah, it's nice, Home Snob nice.
Coming up on Home Snob...
Like this house? Too bad!
You can't afford it.
Why doesn't the inside
look like the outside?
The haunted house vibe scares people away
better than an alarm system.
Plus, I love Halloween.
Or I did until those Hall-No-Weenies
canceled it.
That's why we're here,
to convince you to help us
convince them to uncancel it.
Yes!
And when we're done,
they'll beg for murder!
I mean mercy!
- Why are you yelling?
- Guys, you heard Krupp.
Halloween is nothing but work for adults.
Candy, decorations, jack-o'- lanterns,
costumes, trick-or-treaters, pranks,
and a big mess to clean up when it's over.
Yeah, but adults like work.
And some adults love Halloween,
especially if they own Halloween stores.
No, she's right.
So, we have to remind all adults
why they loved Halloween
before they became adults
by scaring their pants off
with a haunted house.
Yes! Because skeletons
plus fear equals love.
- Not so sure about that math.
- I am.
That's why I opened Hallowarehouse.
Fear is a blast! Yeah!
Glad you feel that way,
'cause we're gonna make the inside
of your house match the outside.
What's that, now?
Chapter Three:
The Scarent Trap.
To lure adults
into the haunted house,
the boys dangled the one carrot
no adult could resist.
Uh, do you think they're really
giving away free batteries here?
I don't know, but for free batteries,
it's worth the risk.
Not for me. I'm waiting outside.
No, you're coming in.
That's why Erica's here,
to convince you there's nothing to fear.
There's nothing to fear...
except werewolves.
Werewolves?
This is the way to free batteries.
There's plenty of tomb! I mean room!
Why is he yelling?
It's so spooky in here!
And I do not see any free batteries.
Boo!
See? I told you this was a mistake.
That was amazing!
It was even better than the haunted house
I went to when I was ten! When I was ten.
So good! So good.
Halloween's awesome!
You need to sign this petition
to uncancel it.
Boys, what are you doing in here?
Forget it! I hate being scared!
- Can we go again?
- Sure. Just sign this petition.
- I knew this would work.
- Yep. It's in the Halloween bag.
I want double-As, Cs and nine-volts,
lots of nine-volts!
Your free batteries are right in-died!
I mean inside! Inside!
Why are you yelling?
Hello, robed stranger.
Will you sign our petition
to uncancel Halloween?
No! Instead, I've turned
your fake haunted house
into a real nightmare
with my Inanimanitator 2000!
It animates the inanimate.
- It brings lifeless objects to life.
- You mean like string, or socks?
Or a comb, or ham, or volleyballs?
Yes, all those things!
And now, when your
living Halloween decorations
scare the adults to death,
it will be the death of Halloween forever!
Evil laugh!
Eh, how bad could it be?
Ow! Uh! Ow!
Bad. We need Captain Underpants.
Aah! Bones!
Save me from the bones!
- Great timing.
- Save yourself.
♪ Tra-la-leg bone! ♪
Looks like he's got a bone
to pick with me, am I right?
So good. Now fight him!
Right. I'll be bad to the bones.
You're on a roll, but we gotta
keep the show moving, so...
So I'll keep it bare bones.
Still rolling!
Chapter Four: The Incredibly
Graphic Violence Chapter,
presented in Hall-O-Rama,
because Halloween is ending with a boo,
courtesy of Hallowarehouse
Hallo-well-that's-it sale.
Everything must go!
Like fake eyeballs.
Oh! An eye for an eye!
Ten for a buck!
And Shrillows, the pillows that scream!
Oh! I'll never sleep again!
Help yourself. No charge.
And Bubble Bats.
They're just bats you put in the bath.
Ugh, I don't wanna be squeaky clean!
We'll pay you to take them! Please!
Captain Underpants for the Hall-o-win!
Uh, not quite.
How are we gonna stop this stuff?
Piece of snake!
Looks like you're up to bat.
I don't think that closet
can hold those decorations.
And it's too small to be practical.
That's why it's time
for a waistband wall-off!
Stand back!
Ooh! Wolf-howl knocker!
Whoo!
Captain Underpants for the Hall-o-win!
- You already used that one.
- Or did I?
Captain Underpants for the Hall-o-win!
That's not me.
Oh! I'm late for a foot massage!
Why am I wet? Where are my pants?
George and Harold,
this time you've done it!
My house
is wrapped in underwear.
Yeah, really sorry about that.
Good news is we got a bunch of signatures
to uncancel Halloween.
Great!
My house and all my worldly possessions
are a small price to pay for that.
Let's go celebrate!
Just need to do one thing first.
See? So much better.
I don't believe it.
All I had to do was oil the hinges?
Huh, who knew?
Everyone. Now let's celebrate.
Yes, let's celebrate my victory.
Your haywire haunted house
has sealed Halloween's fate forever!
We took another vote,
and Halloween is no longer canceled.
- Yes!
- Harold, there's probably more.
There is, you kinked garden hoses.
Halloween is now... illegal!
No!
Officers, arrest those pumpkins!
Chapter Five: Thrillegal.
A $500 fine for carving a pumpkin?
And 1,000 for wearing a costume?
And up to six months in jail
for trick-arrr-treating!
♪ Incarceration! ♪
I wanna do the crime,
but I can't do the time!
Sophie One, get ready to throw
Other Sophie under the bus.
Other Sophie, get ready to go to jaaail.
I guess that's it.
Halloween is officially history.
History? Let's talk about history.
When the Vikings told Columbus
America didn't exist, did he quit?
No! Columbus got on his dragon
and flew until he found America.
Did the Romans give up when
they had nowhere to go to the bathroom?
Nope! Flushus Bowlicus
invented the toilet, and problem solved.
And when the aliens closed space,
did the astronauts pack it up?
No way! The astronauts took
the aliens' rocket for a space joyride.
Not a single thing you just said was true.
Yeah, we don't know history.
- But you're right.
- But we do know Halloween.
So when the adults say
Halloween is illegal, what do we say?
Hall-No-Way! Hall-No-Way!
Hall-No-Way!
Hall-No-Way!
- So, you have a plan?
- I always have a plan.
Coming to the Hall-No-Ween victory party?
Someone might bring cheese.
No, you empty salt shaker.
George and Harold love Halloween
as much as I love DNA Day.
DNA all the way!
Hey!
The Hall-o-war is not over!
'Kay, more cheese for me.
Cheese!
I don't have a plan. I don't even have
a cool name like Skeletorches.
Skeletorches!
They like tea, sure!
- Time for a comic?
- Comic it is.
Captain Underpants
and the Huffy Holihater!
By George and Harold.
So, one time, Holihater,
a bad guy and boring dresser
who hated holidays,
used a Holiray to vaporize
all the town's Halloween stuff.
Candy, berzap!
Overpriced pumpkins, kergok!
Even inflatable owls, for what?
And he was all, "Anyone who says
'Halloween' gets vaporized, too!"
That threw a wrench
into Captain Underpants's Halloween party.
But his party pal Tony was all like,
"Just hack it, man.
Lose the H." 'Cause Tony.
So, Cap Captain Underpants
hacked his Halloween party
into a no-H All-o-ween party.
"Wow, so smart!" "Really?"
Everyone showed up with whatever:
pillows, drywall, tires,
a roller skate, you name it.
And instead of Halloween costumes like
Dracula, Frankenstein, and the mummy,
people dressed as Doctorca,
an orca who went to med school;
and Scorpionion, half scorpion,
half onion, all monster;
and Frobra, a frozen cobra!
'Cause All-o-ween, no H,
was the Wild West of holidays
with fewer cowboy hats and horse cars.
But when people posted pictures online,
due to low self-esteem,
Holihater saw them
and crashed the party to shut it down.
And Captain Underpants
was all, "Party foul!"
And he dunked Holihater
in Tony's mystery punch,
which was just lemonade,
pickle juice, and ketchup,
'cause Tony, agh!
And Holihater was all,
"Ugh, too pickle-y! I give up!"
Turns out Holihater only hated holidays
because he was never invited to parties.
So Captain Underpants gave a toast,
"To a holigreat guy!"
And everyone got pucker face
from the punch.
Then the cops showed up
'cause there were noise complaints.
"Too loud!" Okay, the end.
- So, we're gonna hack Halloween?
- You mean Hack-A-Ween.
One day before Halloween.
I mean Hack-A-Ween.
We did it! Halloween is finished!
Tomorrow night there'll be no costumes,
no candy, and no doorbells.
Just peace and quiet
and a bathtub full of guacamole.
To Hall-No-Ween and cheese!
We should have a victory party.
Tomorrow night!
What? This is the victory party.
What if we all have victory parties
tomorrow night?
No, no, no! It's tonight.
We have cheese!
Ooh! And we can all go door to door
to each party.
Byah! Byah!
And we should wear costumes!
Costumes.
And give out
yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah candy!
- And hang skeletons in the trees.
- And fight the toilet zombies.
No. No! That's Halloween!
We want Hall-No-Ween!
Oh, no!
No, the cheese!
Oh, no!
No!
Chapter Six:
Tween Ween Fighting Machine.
It's called Hack-A-Ween.
- It's a complete reinvention of Halloween.
- As this helpful video will explain.
Welcome
to Hack-A-Ween Orientation.
Courtesy
of Treehouse Comix Productions.
Like Halloween,
but don't want to get arrested?
Then Hack-A-Ween,
a legally acceptable workaround
to the Halloween ban, is for you.
Not yet, Gooch. Too soon.
- Instead of costumes...
- Disguises!
- They're the same thing.
- Not if we say they aren't.
Gooch, what are you doing?
- Instead of trick-or-treating for candy...
- Sneak-or-snacking for snacks.
- Here are some nachos.
- ♪ Snacky! ♪
Now stay out of my garage,
you whippersnappers.
♪ Sneaky! ♪
Gooch!
Instead of Halloween monsters,
like Dracula, Frankenstein,
and a werewolf...
New Hack-A-Ween personalities
like Doctorca, Scorpionion, and Frobra.
Gooch, this is your scene.
I'm Frobra!
- Want hypothermia?
- Frostbite! Want frostbite!
And that's Hack-A-Ween.
Yes, we know. We're in the video.
- I like Frobra.
- Because it's you.
We'll post this video online
to get the other kids on board.
Now we just need Hack-A-Ween supplies.
Which won't be easy
because Krupp and Melvin
were collecting all things Halloween
for disposal.
- Feeling better now, Sneedly?
- Yes.
George and Harold can't revive Halloween
if there's nothing left to revive.
♪ Plastic glowing skulls ♪
♪ Fake blood that's half full ♪
♪ Masks and wigs and claws and fangs ♪
♪ And bats and way too many evil clowns ♪
Oh, who are you calling evil? Ha!
- Now we just need to burn it.
- Right.
Wait, burn it? We can't burn it!
That pile is mostly cheap plastic.
It'll go up like a...
Our eyebrows will grow back.
Fortunately, George and Harold
found some Hallowiggle room.
"Hackawarehouse."
I like it.
- You sure this won't get me arrested?
- Sure enough.
And if you go down,
we're all going down with you.
I'll call my lawyer.
Uh, sir, forklifts aren't allowed
in Avocadepot.
Too late, it's done.
I'm whipping up a guacamole bath.
A guaca-bath!
A bath-mole!
Still working on the name.
Point is, this is a code green
and I need all the avocados.
- Uh, sir, we deliver!
- Really?
Great, 'cause I don't know
how to drive this thing.
Aah!
Every kid in Piqua
saw the Hack-A-Ween video.
Ugh! I knew George and Harold
were up to something.
- Including Melvin.
- Hack-A-Ween!
They may have found a loophole
in Hall-No-Ween,
but I'll make them wish they hadn't!
Melvin?
We're worried about how much time
you spend without any friends.
Uh, so we arranged a playdate
with one of your little classmates.
I'm here because my mom
gave me five dollars.
Hack-A-Ween Day.
Ready for Hack-A-Ween, Deputy Drawers?
Hangin' loose and sippin' juice,
Lieutenant Long Johns.
Who are you again?
We're expanding
the Captain Underpants universe.
So we're in very un-Halloweeny
spin-off disguises.
- You?
- I'm the junior senator from Mars.
Like, I'm Dr. Braincrime,
head of Weirdo Penitentiary.
Sophie One is Warden Frownface
and Other Sophie is, like,
our most dangerous prisoner,
Noiseless Nancyyy.
You sure these costumes
won't land us in jail?
They're not costumes.
They're disguises, remember?
I checked with Underneath The Law.
We're good.
Youse got legal troubles?
I got you covered, chief.
I'm a plumber.
Yeah, that legal advice
is as solid as a copper pipe.
And those are fantastic Doctorca,
Scorpionion, and Frobra disguises.
- ♪ Frobra! ♪
- But I'm Frobra!
Hey, why did you guys need me
to harvest all my pit cabbages?
Well, jack-o'- lanterns are illegal,
but hack-o'- lanterns aren't.
How are the hack-o'- lanterns coming,
Mr. Rattlechains?
Good, but cabbages are harder
to carve than pumpkins,
so I also have enough coleslaw
to choke a rhino.
Perfect. Guys, let's hack it up.
Wait! I have a surprise for you.
Called in some favors
from my inflatables guys.
Happy Hack-A-Ween!
Whoa!
- It's Doctorca!
- And Scorpionion!
♪ And me! ♪
No, I'm Frobra! Me!
This is the most beautiful sight
these eyes have ever seen.
These eyes, too.
Thanks, Mr. Rattlechains.
Okay, Hack-A-Weeners,
let's get out there and let
the tortilla chips fall where they may.
Yeah, into our bags
with pizza rolls and tater tots!
Chapter Seven: Big Hack Attack.
No doorbells, remember?
Hack-A-Ween.
Right. And if we get arrested,
I hope we get an ocean-view cell.
Oh, sorry, toilet reflexes.
What's up?
- Sneak or snack!
- What is that?
Like, trick or treat?
I thought Halloween was outlawed.
It was, but this is Hack-A-Ween,
a legally sound alternative
according to Underneath the Law.
Sneak or snack means you give us a snack
or we do something sneaky.
You guys like turkey jerky?
Melvin's house.
Maybe we should skip it.
As they say, you mess with the Melvin,
you get the beakers.
If you skip a house on a Halloween,
you might miss something good.
Same deal for Hack-A-Ween.
- Sneak or...
- This is worse than Halloween!
...snack.
I'm starting to think
Melvin hates Halloween.
Happy Hack-A-Ween!
- ♪ Sneak or snack! ♪
- And nice disguise.
What disguise?
Like, give us snacks, or we let
Noiseless Nancy make some noooise.
I just made tuna casserole.
Where's the yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-
yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah fire?
Happy Hack-A-Ween!
♪ Sneak or snack! ♪
Sneak, it is.
Just some more kids in disguises
begging for food.
Speaking of food, I could really go
for a yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah burrito.
Not now. Not now.
We're in the zone.
But I need more paint, so don't move.
- Sneak.
- Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah hello?
- Sneak!
- Aah! Who yeah-yeah-yeah said that?
- We said sneak or snack.
- You chose wrong.
- What's all that screaming?
- Mom!
Seriously?
You've gotta stop painting this guy.
I can't!
He's my muse. My muse.
I'm her muuuse.
So, you got any snacks?
Ah, guaca-bath-ole.
Relaxation is served.
Huh.
Probably just a boat.
Or a goose fight.
Or the big game.
- Happy Hack-A-Ween!
- Hey, those aren't fighting gooses!
- ♪ Sneak or snack! ♪
- No, it can't be.
Halloween is illegal. Illegal! Ow!
Mm! These stuffed mushrooms are sublime.
- Wait until you try the shrimp toast.
- Aah!
Happy Hack-A-Ween?
You!
Sneak or sna...
Happy Hack-A-Ween!
Who wants popcorn shrimp? Oh!
Hello, Mr. Krupp.
Uh, why are you green?
Because I was in the middle
of a relaxing guaca-bath-ole
when I was interrupted
by these two Halloween hoodlums!
- Arrest them!
- For what?
For Halloweening!
It's against the law!
True, but they're celebrating Hack-A-Ween.
That's perfectly legal.
I checked Underneath The Law.
Underneath the Law: if you
can read, you can give legal advice.
Hack-A-Ween? Yeah, that's legal.
I clean pools.
And frankly, Hack-A-Ween's a hoot-a-ween!
Finger food! Byah, byah!
Ooh, now I gotta fry up some fish sticks
before kids sneak into my basement.
This isn't over. You're gonna slip up.
And when you do, I'll be there
to bring the law down on your heads,
just like that!
Like...
♪ Tra-la-lobster roll! ♪
Cool disguises, guys.
Let me guess, you're a kayak
and you're an active volcano.
No, we're spin-offs.
- I'm...
- Don't bother. He's disguise-blind.
Who am I?
- So, where'd you get all the grub?
- From sneak-or-snacking.
- It's like trick-or-treating, but...
- Oh, I got it!
♪ Tra-la-lettuce wraps! ♪
Sneak or snack!
- He doesn't got it.
- No, but we got it, buddy.
- We saved Halloween with Hack-A-Ween.
- Yep. Everybody's happy.
- Back, Hack-A-Ween horde!
- Everybody except Melvin.
Or be bathed in hot chili.
Mother, more chili!
Hack-A-Ween tanked his Hall-No-Ween plans.
I wonder why Melvin turned on Halloween.
He had a blast trick-or-treating
with us all last year.
Trick or treat!
- He didn't go with us.
- The year before that?
- Trick or treat!
- Nope. No Melvin then either.
Has Melvin ever been
trick-or-treating with us?
That's why Melvin hates Halloween.
- Just like Holihater in our comic!
- ♪ Callback! ♪
Chapter Eight: Melvinvitation.
Yeah, yeah, sneak or snack!
Take your pigs in a blanket
and stay out of our guest bathroom!
Oh, it's you two.
Here to gloat?
Well, enjoy your victory while it lasts.
Actually, we're here to see
if you wanna join us.
Yeah, grab a disguise
and come sneak-or-snacking.
Oh, sure!
And then you'll turn into vampire cops
and arrest me for not having a neck!
I'm no fool! I know your tricks!
No tricks. They're illegal.
More importantly...
we want you to come.
- What?
- Yeah, you can be a spin-off just like us!
Your name is...
Melvinhaler!
And you have the power
to, uh, breathe easy.
You just need a cape.
- You're... You're giving me your cape?
- Sure.
That's what Hack-A-Ween's all about,
mending bridges.
It's... It's mending fences.
And it's a very gracious offer.
I just wish you made it 38 minutes ago.
Why? What happened 38 minutes ago?
What's that noise?
- Noise? I don't hear a noise.
- Melvin, what did you do?
Nothing. Let's go.
Which house shall we visit first?
Melvin, what did you do?
Me? Do?
- What?
- Melvin!
Okay, I was angry. I wanted revenge.
How was I to know
you'd come and mend bridges?
Wait, is it bridges or fences?
Harold, look!
Oh, no!
He hacked Hack-A-Ween!
Melvin, whatever you did, un-did it!
Look, I can't!
Bringing those inflatables to life
fried the Inanimanitator!
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry!
We don't need sorry.
We need Captain Underpants.
But we're still going
sneak-or-snacking together, right?
Aah! Guys?
Guys, that house down the street
is giving out aluminum siding.
Mm!
Aluminuminummy!
Hey, big balloon guys!
I gotta get a picture with them
for my album.
Those aren't nice balloons.
They're messed-up Hack-A-Ween balloons.
And that means no more sneak-or-snacking.
Nuh-uh!
No one gets between me and my siding.
Time to blow up some blow-ups.
So, shall we...
sneak... or snack?
♪ Tra-la-la! ♪
Chapter Nine: The Second
Incredibly Graphic Violence Chapter,
presented in Horror-O-Rama,
because something that fun to say
can't be violent or scary.
Horror-O-Rama!
Horror-O-Rama!
I'm walking in the woods, alone, at night.
Seems safe to me.
Forest for the Screams.
In theaters this Hack-A-Ween.
I'm showering in my underwear.
What could go wrong?
The Final Shower.
In theaters this Hack-A-Ween.
I'm lost in an abandoned prison.
Now, this was a bad call.
Don't Go
Into That Abandoned Prison.
In theaters this Hack-A-Ween.
Knocked...
...the wind...
...out of me!
Can't breathe!
Can't breathe? That's a job for...
Melvinhaler! Melvin, he's got the need!
Yes! Uh, yes! I am Melvinhaler!
And by the power of bronchial dilators,
I will open your airways,
expand your troubled lungs,
and end wheezing!
Whoa, that needs work.
Thanks for the air, nerdy bear!
- Now, how do I let the air out of them?
- You don't.
Lieutenant Long Johns
and Deputy Drawers do!
Courtesy of Mrs. Wrinklefoot,
who really stepped it up for Hack-A-Ween.
But how do we get into kabob range?
Captain Underpants,
can you create a distraction
so we can get close enough
to burst those bubbles?
I'm all distraction... and cheese!
♪ Tra-la-lamb kabobs! ♪
The bounce stops here...
Ow! Whoa! Ow!
I can't pop them!
So let 'em pop themselves!
Can you bounce back from bouncing?
Spin-offs for the Hack-a-win!
- Help!
- Help!
Whoa, you're like a rubber wall!
I have those in my room.
Time to pull out all the pops.
Whoa!
Kabobs!
Why am I wet? Where are my pants?
- Boom! We Hack-a-won!
- Yeah!
Good thing this isn't one of those movies
where you think it's over, but it's not.
Uh, anyone seen my house?
It's missing.
- Found it.
- But how is it moving?
Well...
I may have blasted the house
with the Inanimanitator
to bring it to life.
I...
What? I was angry!
Time for round two, Cap U!
Don't snap at me! I'm not a bird!
He's still wet. We're on our own.
We lost Halloween.
We can't lose Hack-A-Ween!
Yes! We must save Hack-A-Ween
because I'm having fun now, so it matters!
Don't worry,
nothing three spin-offs can't handle.
I-I'm sorry, did you say three?
The Spinoffs!
Starring Lieutenant Long Johns
and Deputy Drawers and Melvinhaler!
By George and Harold.
Sooooo, Halloween so!
The Spinoffs do what you always do
when your house is crawling with life...
they called an exterminator.
Lieutenant Long Johns
and Deputy Drawers kept the house busy
with a heroic game
of ding dong ditch, ding dong!
While Melvinhaler took
a deep, cleansing breath
and turned the exterminator's tent
into the Nonexistent 2000.
Pssh-kank-sqwork Nonexistent!
The Nonexistent convinced
the stuff in the house
it wasn't alive anymore,
and problem solved!
Spinoffs!
Gosh, good thing exterminators
take care of monster houses.
- So, when can I move back in?
- Not for a year, at least.
A bill? Seriously?
And while Hack-A-Ween wasn't perfect,
it was the perfect reminder
that all kids love Halloween.
- I feel like candy!
- Mm, mm, mm!
Even if they are adults.
- Candy rules!
- Mm, mm, mm. At any price!
And these costumes are inspiring!
- So good.
- I love being someone else.
Are you a yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah mirror?
So, all in favor
of bringing back Halloween?
Byah!
The byahs have it!
- Halloween is reinstated!
- Aah!
- Double byah! Byah!
- No! No!
Hey, look!
"Halloween meeting tonight.
Bring your own snacks."
"Halloween is back!
Get your ghost on."
Ugh, sorry, Melvin.
Oh, don't be.
I'm not really candy intolerant.
That was just an excuse I used to minimize
the unpleasantness of Halloween.
I actually enjoy candy. Watch.
See? I'm totally fi...
I'm so sick!
Happy Hack-A-Ween!