The Last Will Be the Last (2015) - full transcript
Life used to smile at Luciana Colacci. Well, she was not the wealthiest woman on earth, as she was only a worker in the local factory, but she had very good relationships with her friends, the people of her neighborhood and her fellow employees. And she was (almost) happily married to Stefano, a charmer with a nice sense of humor. But almost only... considering the fact that her partner was more interested in hanging out in cafes doing business that never succeeded than in supporting his wife. That almost perfect life unfortunately came to an end the day Luciana was abruptly fired. Her crime: being pregnant! A fateful day which marked the beginning of her slow descent into hell...
Ma'am, drop the gun
or I'll be forced to shoot.
- What should I do?
- Do what the cop says.
Ma'am, I'm telling you
to lower the gun!
No! I won't!
..and the Holy Spirit.
As it was in the beginning,
is now and ever shall be,
world without end, amen.
Hail Mary, full of grace,
the Lord is with thee...
Not again!
Blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, mother of God...
Morning, Mrs. Gina,
morning, ladies.
THE LAST WILL BE LAST
You didn't go to mass?
- Hey, Luciana.
- Hi.
Come here!
Hi, Enzo!
You bought a new stroller?
Yep, we bought this spaceship.
- Hey, doll!
- Doll, how are you?
I haven't seen them in 2 weeks,
they've grown so much.
Those legs need to be nibbled!
- What took you so long?
- I took the host.
You should take the pill instead.
Don't say that!
Children are blessings from God.
Four blessings is a lot!
He could've give some to Luciana,
she doesn't have any.
Shut up!
- I made a joke.
- Don't, because you're no good at it.
Lia, how are you?
Darling.
I said a prayer for your dear mom,
I miss her so much.
- Thanks.
- Can I ask you a favor?
Can you help my granddaughter
find a job? Please?
It's not easy nowadays,
but I'll see what I can do.
Hey, pals!
Did you go to confession?
Did you fess up?
Mrs. Lia, did you?
Hope so...
- Let's take a selfie.
- Mrs. Lia too!
Stand near me.
Hold my bag.
Squeeze together
so we're all in it. Ready?
Rossana,
can you smile at least today?
Simona, when will you marry
and settle down?
When your husband stops sexting me!
Liar!
Buffalo mozzarella
doesn't exist in Slovenia,
we'd make a killing there!
My friend sells limoncello
in California.
Now he's got a mansion
and two blondes who serve him drinks.
You've got a wife
who made you a casserole.
- Hey, sweetheart.
- Yeah, right...
Give Marione's daughter
some pastries.
Just call me Luciana!
- Oh well, Luciana...
- Professor!
We're still so fond of Marione,
God rest his soul.
A true warrior and motivator.
He had spirit till the very end.
He only weighed 40 kg, but never
stopped cheating on your mom.
Thanks for that lovely reminder.
Well, Zanzotto...
I've never met
a dishonorably transferred agent before.
You sure mucked things up
in your town.
- It shouldn't have happened...
- Silence.
Because of you,
people no longer trust us.
Things will be different here:
you'll do highway patrol.
So you won't screw anything up.
Sir.
She's Caputo, your partner,
the only one who didn't refuse
to partner with you.
Will we both be able
to fit into the car?
I wouldn't joke if I were you.
Next time, you won't get off
with just a transfer.
Be very careful, Zanzotto.
And pray nothing happens
or you'll be on your ass.
Yes, sir.
Look out, as of today criminals
have their days numbered!
Lethal Weapon is here!
Enjoy...
Want some gum?
We're on the air live,
don't show me up.
I won't, as long as you strip naked!
No way!
Naked! Naked!
These two are so funny.
Geez, why can't I listen to
the radio in peace?
Where are my glasses?
- Here. Will you fix the antenna?
- Yes.
- Hold it!
- What?
You look like
you've gone through the grinder.
I have to go.
What's the rush?
A sweet deal in the works...
- Try and make a buck or two.
- Yes, kiss.
- Hi.
- Hello.
- I got here early.
- That's good.
These are the offices,
we work on the other side.
- Morning, Bruno.
- Luciana, good morning.
Omelet sandwich for breakfast?
Of course, and for lunch a sandwich
with a pepper omelet.
Nice diet...
- This is Matilde.
- It's a pleasure... sorry...
- Bruno Sebastiani, it's a pleasure.
- Likewise.
This useless human here is Ruggero.
On rare occasions he even wakes up.
Careful, it's a narrow passage.
Thanks.
Step one: the iron.
See, while the timer's on
you come here and do the hair.
We'll use this as an example.
- You rake out the hair.
- Rake out?
- Untangle it.
- I see...
You try untangling it.
No, it got stuck because...
because you pulled down,
so it gets stuck, see?
- Right.
- See?
Do it this way and it slides smoothly.
Hold on, the iron is ready now.
Forceful.
No, not like that
or the timer won't start. Okay?
Try again.
Careful, it's hot.
Go!
Well done!
Grab the hair.
Not with two hands,
we're not in the jungle.
- Use the left hand, okay?
- Got it.
Careful, these are sharp.
Make sure to give it your all.
He is very...
- Hi, Luciana.
- Be smart.
- Hi, Tommaso.
- Hello.
- She's the temp?
- She just moved here...
- How'd the tryout go?
- Very well, she did a great job.
I'll be honest,
we're not offering a yearly contract,
I just need a 3-month replacement
for Teresa.
Then we'll see
when she comes back... okay?
Okay, that's awesome.
Thanks.
Thanks, Tommaso.
And my contract renewal?
- You don't even need to ask...
- Thanks.
- Who is it?
- Zanzotto, Antonio Zanzotto.
The chief gave me your address
for the room for rent.
- Come in.
- Hello.
The kitchen.
Bathroom with hot water.
The room, the mattress is new.
My husband only used it for a month
then he died.
Great.
The hairdresser is waiting in there
to do my hair.
Go ahead, ma'am.
- I'll close the door.
- Thanks.
No, the razors!
Holy shit, what is that?
Let us acknowledge our sins
to celebrate the sacred mysteries.
I confess to almighty God, to my
brothers and sisters that I have sinned
in my thoughts and words,
what I have done and failed to do,
through my fault,
through my most grievous fault...
- Excuse me, ma'am?
- Yes?
How come I hear the mass
in the sink?
It's because of the antennas.
Handy, isn't it?
- I hear the mass in bed!
- Very handy.
You okay, Mr. Antonio?
Yes, I was wondering if
you happen to have a disposable razor.
- No, sorry.
- I do.
Here, it's new, you can keep it.
- Thanks.
- No problem.
- I'm Antonio.
- Hi, Manuela.
Excuse me.
Wait, miss!
I'll help you with that.
- Thanks.
- Let me.
- I'm not used to people helping.
- No?
- In the car?
- Yes.
- Open the trunk.
- Yes.
Go ahead, thanks.
- Stick it in the back.
- Okay.
Thanks.
- All set.
- Very kind of you.
- I must repay the favor.
- It's no big deal.
No, I insist.
Then you can offer me coffee
next time.
- Okay.
- But I'll pay!
- Then you'd be offering!
- That's all right.
- Thanks again.
- Goodbye.
- Guys, let's make a toast.
- What's the occasion?
He got a loan for the new house.
Bleeding me dry...
I'll be paying even after I'm dead.
Enzo, that's how it is
for everyone nowadays.
When will you be moving?
It should be ready in a few months.
Rossana and I haven't been apart
for more than a week since birth.
We need to get our kids
away from these antennas
or they'll end up
like your mom and dad.
- Why on earth would you say that?
- I can't say a fucking thing!
Last one there pays for drinks!
- He outruns his opponents and wins!
- He's such a kid.
Don't take off your shirt in public.
- Why?
- You give me goosebumps.
So do you, even when you're dressed.
And when you get angry...
Oh baby!
- No biting.
- A little bite...
- You'll scar me.
- Come on, I like it...
Don't stop or I'll divorce you.
No way, I can't afford to pay alimony.
- Ora pro nobis...
- What's that?
- Ora pro nobis.
- That's a real turn-off.
- St. Rita of Cascia.
- Ora pro nobis!
- St. Paul the Apostle.
- Ora pro nobis.
How long do you have to
hold that pose?
- It said a few hours online.
- Damn, those sperms are slow.
- That's what it said.
- Maybe it'll help if I do it too.
- Dummy.
- I make you laugh.
- You sure do.
- Gimme a kiss.
- Ouch, I've got a cramp.
- Just put your legs down.
Colacci... here you go.
Thanks.
Either do business well or not at all.
You're right.
Sorry, it's a client,
give me a minute.
- Sorry to interrupt your sweet deal.
- What is it?
- Huh?
- Understand?
I don't understand.
How'd the deal go?
That's what I meant... well!
Will they deliver the parcel?
Hope it's a female parcel.
Yes!
- Any cravings?
- Watermelon.
Where'll I find one in November?
- I was kidding.
- I knew that...
- Bye, baby.
- Bye.
What can I get for you?
Sambuca with a coffee bean.
Okay.
- Antonio, sambuca?
- Yes.
- That's pretty old-fashioned.
- I guess.
For you... miss?
A Spritz.
I'm from the 21 st century.
- A Spritz for the lady.
- Okay.
Thanks, you can go.
How long have you been in Italy?
I came here more or less in 2000.
- You were just a little girl.
- No.
I was already developed.
Why are they staring at us?
Who knows.
Bet they wish they were me,
sitting close to you.
- I doubt it.
- No?
They've never seen me out with a man
since I got here.
I see...
I consider myself lucky then,
hot damn!
Mrs. Colacci,
Mr. Saltutti wants to see you.
- Saltutti?
- Yes.
- Wow... wonder what for.
- Dunno.
- Sir...
- Have a seat.
- How are you, Luciana?
- Fine, thanks.
A bit surprised,
you've never called me in before.
Did I do something wrong?
Luciana,
I'll get straight to the point.
Okay.
I can't renew your contract.
- Meaning?
- You understood.
You're firing me?
No, we're not renewing your contract.
Same thing.
I'm sorry,
but we'll have to manage without you.
But I can't manage without you.
What'll I do?
I'm sorry, it's not up to me,
I'm just doing my job
and I assure you it's not easy.
But in your condition, how much longer
will you be able to work?
- My condition?
- Luciana, you're pregnant.
Were you going to tell us
after the renewal?
- Does that seem fair?
- No, I would've told you.
And I certainly can't ask you
to forgo pregnancy.
- Why, would that make a difference?
- Well...
I see.
Luciana...
You would've been showing
in 2 months...
But in 2 months my contract
would've been renewed, you bitch!
You should be ashamed of yourself.
- And what you say to her instead?
- What'd I say...
Nothing.
You could've told Saltutti
the pregnancy isn't a sure thing.
- It's not the first time...
- Hoping for a miscarriage?
- No, but if it happens again...
- It won't.
- I don't want you to be upset.
- It won't happen again.
It'll be fine this time, I can feel it.
Okay, it won't happen again.
My father was a mechanic,
his name was Mario.
He'd take me to the hills
to see the sunset and tell me stories.
Not Little Red Riding Hood
or Snow White...
He told me when he was a kid
he'd steal cheese from German soldiers
for my grandma.
Once he won the lottery
and bought a Fiat 500.
And to win over mom he exchanged blows
with Belotti the bully.
Marione told me stories
about him reacting.
And then he'd mock me
because I never reacted.
Finardi!
Hold up!
What were you thinking?
Meaning? You make it sound like
I got up to mischief.
I've been trying for 10 years,
I have every right!
Why didn't you tell me?
Saltutti knew and I didn't.
How can I fucking help you
if you don't talk to me?
You're right.
All you can do now is
wait till the next renewal in 6 months.
Just don't forget about me.
Leave it to me.
- Thanks.
- I still think you screwed up.
- Bruno?
- Luciana...
- I wanted to say bye.
- I just can't believe it...
You won't be here tomorrow.
You're telling me,
I've been working here forever.
No, Luciana, don't do that!
You're always so cheerful,
don't fall apart now!
Come on.
Finardi is a slick bastard,
he'll get you back in.
You'll have a job again soon.
- Hope so.
- Trust me.
I'd drive you home,
but I'm here alone.
- Say bye to him when he wakes up.
- If he wakes up.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Hi, mom.
Toni! Don't just stand there,
come help me.
You're always sulking.
Don't drop the codfish, Toni.
Don't call me Toni, I hate it.
All right Toni, but let's go
because I need to tinkle.
Okay.
Careful, that drawer is broken.
A miracle has occurred...
I heard the holy mass for free!
It was coming from the sink.
- Do you usually pay for the mass?
- I leave a donation.
Mom, it's not a miracle.
It's radiation from the antennas
which is bad for you,
sooner or later it'll make me sick.
This place is not heaven, it's hell.
Sweet Mary, you're always so negative.
I'll heat you up some codfish.
Codfish now?
It's 5:00 in the afternoon...
Perfect time for a snack.
Fine.
Honey, you're not the first or last
person who's been fired.
Say it louder, they didn't hear you
in the next town over.
We'll roll up our sleeves now.
- Who, you?
- That's not fair.
I'm closing a sweet deal
and you'll get your job back.
What deal is that?
Buying Rastelli's discarded chairs,
they're practically free.
- Free?
- No, but dirt cheap.
I already found a buyer,
he needs them for his restaurant.
No, we don't have a cent.
We'll sell them for double the price.
Trust me for once.
All right.
- Hi, Stefano.
- Not him...
- Can I talk to you?
- Sure.
- I'll just steal him a second.
- Go ahead.
How's it going?
Hi, professor.
I swear I'll sort it out.
Give me 20 days, I'm closing a deal.
- So you don't have the money?
- Not now.
- I'll wait till this bad spell's over.
- Thanks.
- But don't make me come look for you.
- Of course.
What's up? Your landlord's
come looking for money?
I'm terribly ashamed...
what's more, Stefano
had one of his brilliant ideas again.
Oh hell...
Why not come do catering with us
for a while?
We'll split the earnings three ways
till you get the job back.
Rossana, what can I say?
Thanks.
Canapé?
Care for a canapé?
- Bubbly, sir?
- Thanks, Rossana.
How long did renovations take?
Two years,
but she took care of it all.
- Nonsense.
- She slogged away.
She chose the architect,
contractor, decor... I did nothing.
- It was no big deal.
- She did it all.
- Excuse me.
- No, thanks.
Happy birthday dear Giulia,
happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday, honey.
A great birthday
requires a great gift,
so I happen to have
a little something for you.
- Here, honey.
- Thanks.
It's gorgeous, honey.
It's stunning, thanks.
Times are tough...
This year we lost
400,000 euros in net profits.
But Raimondo hit it big
with those betting centers.
I can't complain, I just opened
my sixth one, things are good.
- Do you gamble too?
- Are you crazy? Never.
No, I make a profit
off those poor fools who gamble.
Damn Sampdoria team,
I lost 300 euros on a bet!
- Sampdoria still?
- So what?
- It's like the Lazio team.
- No soccer, please.
- Who picked this place?
- Enzo.
- Online coupon.
- 9.90 euros!
- Are you nuts?
- What'll we eat?
Welcome to "The Codfather",
we serve traditional Roman dishes
revamped with fish.
Pastas: amatriciana with fish,
carbonara with fish,
- or gricia...
- With fish...
Second courses: grilled squid,
sweet and sour bass,
codfish fillet, or stewed cuttlefish.
Or steamed angler fish
with vegetables.
How fancy!
Or even broiled lavaret with potatoes.
- So it's not just fish?
- No, dumbass.
Isn't Lavaret that bird
that swims in oil spills?
That's a cormorant!
I recommend it,
it's very delicate and very...
Side dishes: chicory and mixed greens.
How about some ceviche?
- No, she can't.
- No raw fish for me.
- Congratulations.
- Thanks.
I know what I want.
Gricia, mixed greens, chicory,
and just two pieces of codfish.
Eating light, I see...
- Don't be shy, eat something!
- Shut up, I'm hungry!
Pregnancy weight is hard to lose.
Quit being nasty!
- How about some assorted starters?
- Yes.
- Still or sparkling water?
- Both.
Excuse me, never mind...
I wanted to ask
if they have any fish dishes.
So...
I'll buy you the good luck onesie
for when it's born
since you're like a sister to me.
You're going to make me cry!
- Rossana, come on!
- What?
The poor thing's a hormonal mess.
You're gonna make her croak!
Crybaby, I spoke to my sister,
she can lend you
her old playpen and walker.
- So don't buy them.
- All right.
Hand-me-downs are great,
babies outgrow things so fast.
I'll give you crib sheets,
they're practically new
since my little leeches
would only sleep in our bed.
Don't mention them today,
it's like a dream to have a day off.
Happy birthday to you...
A fish-shaped cake!
Happy birthday dear Stefano,
happy birthday to you!
Ready?
- I'll cut it.
- Will you fillet it?
- Happy birthday, baby.
- Wonder what it is...
- I'm dying to know.
- What is it?
It's awesome, thanks baby!
In your face! In your face!
- Why'd you buy that?
- He kept hounding me...
Careful where you leave it,
someone might steal it.
While we were in the Champions League,
you were in the kiddie league!
- League 2!
- I'll light up in your face.
This is from us.
She's the brains behind it.
We'll accept anything.
"Gift certificate for a crib".
- Darling!
- Thanks so much.
This is from us.
Hope you like it...
- You'd better!
- Look...
It's a voucher
for five pool workout sessions.
- Prenatal sessions...
- I thought it was my birthday!
- It cost 150 euros!
- Aren't you classy?
A drop above the rest,
your friend here.
If he were my friend, he would've
just handed him cash.
If we didn't buy it for Luciana
you would've had to.
Of course! I would've bought it...
Yeah...
So... Moretti,
Iacobelli, and Corsetti
are lucky and have December 24
till January 2 off.
Roccotelli and Brugna are spared
for December 25 and 26,
you start vacation
at the end of the week.
At most I'll be on the couch
eating fruitcake.
Silence...
Caputo and Zanzotto will be on duty.
Figures...
Sorry sir...
You promised me I could take
my mom home for Christmas.
Promised? I don't make promises.
Ever.
You could ask a colleague
to swap shifts.
Who'll give up their vacation
for Zanzotto?
Sorry... you'll have to put mom
on a bus then. All right?
Antonio! Look!
There's a surprise for you.
- Manuela, how much do I owe you?
- No...
The first time is free,
you can pay next time.
- Are you sure?
- Yes, your mom is so sweet.
I took the liberty of doing
something... Want to see?
Come along.
- Voila.
- How lovely, what is it?
A coatrack.
It represents l'arbro de la vida,
that means the tree of life.
I noticed you toss your clothes
on a chair and they get arrugan...
- They get...
- They get creased... true.
- It's better this way.
- Yes.
- Are you upset?
- No.
- Is it too colorful?
- No, it's wonderful.
- Did I overstep the bounds?
- Nonsense.
You're so kind.
Thank you.
And you're always so kind to me.
It's the least I can do.
Okay, bye.
Antonio, I have an idea:
Saturday I'll take you to Cesano
to eat some great pasta.
Okay, great idea...
- Bye.
- Bye, see you Saturday.
- Careful going down the stairs.
- Okay.
Mom?
- Where are you?
- In the bathroom.
Come in.
What are you doing?
I can hear it better from the toilet.
..and I ask the blessed Mary,
ever virgin...
- Don't you look lovely?
- Indeed.
And also with you...
Amen!
Mom, listen.
I'm sorry but they screwed up
my vacation days,
I have to work on Christmas.
- Yes.
- But I have to go back to town.
I can't neglect your sisters
and their kids at Christmas!
I know.
So tell me... what do you think
about that lady, like her?
Yes, what can I say...
she's a good man.
What do you mean, man?
Toni... are you just plain stupid?
There's nothing wrong
with having an invert friend.
What does that have to do
with Manuela? She's a woman.
Toni, her name's Manuel
and she's manlier than you.
- You think?
- Yes.
Let us pray...
Our Father, who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name...
Manuela!
What is it, Antonio?
Sweet Jesus, she's a man.
You played the lady with me...
Antonio, let go!
I introduced you to my mom.
We sat at the cafe
in front of everyone.
What an ass I made of myself...
Thanks to you, everyone in town
will think I'm a faggot!
- Why didn't you say anything?
- Everyone here knows.
Don't get any funny ideas,
people like you gross me out.
Why?
Do you think you're so cool?
I liked you because you were kind,
but you're just fake.
Me, fake? You're fake!
And a fraud!
Bet I know how
you made a living before...
Buddy, I'm a hairdresser now
and I work in clubs on weekends.
I'm an honest, upright person
who makes good choices.
And what about you, Antonio?
Rumor has it you're incapable
of making good choices.
Bye.
Keep making circles
with your arms underwater.
Forward and back...
Amazing, I feel like I weigh 20 kg!
Right?
Wish we could do this every day.
Move the legs and turn sideways...
Move forward with a breaststroke...
Here comes the collector...
- Collector of what?
- Take a guess!
What's she wearing, dental floss?
I'd wear that too if I had her body.
Poor fool is falling for her...
Little does he know
that she devours men after mating.
What's the problem?
She's pretty, single,
why can't she have fun?
I like her...
Alternate the legs...
Luciana, congrats!
- Thanks, doll.
- I heard the news, awesome!
I already can't stand her...
Limber your hips, fatso!
It says we should be talking
to the baby in the womb
because it understands.
Apparently, newborns sleep
up to 16 hours a day.
But they wake up every 3 hours.
You made your bed, now lie in it.
And baby food is super expensive.
How'll we manage?
The chair money will save us.
I should've said no
to that chair deal.
- But you said yes.
- Not really.
You always say yes to me.
You said yes
when I first kissed you,
and 30 minutes after
when I want to bonk...
- How romantic.
- You said yes to marriage.
Well, I just say yes out of pity.
It's cold.
- Where the hell are my pajamas?
- Same place as always.
- Same place?
- Here.
If it's a girl
we should call her Asia.
No way.
We can't call a suburban kid Asia.
- And if it's a boy?
- I was thinking about Mario.
- Like your dad.
- Yes.
I don't want to impose though...
- It's old-fashioned.
- It's classic.
- We'll decide later.
- My baby must be a Lazio fan.
- Figures.
- Let me have a chat with your belly.
Line-up of Lazio
1973-1974 Italian champions:
Pulici, Petrelli, Martini,
Wilson, Oddi, Nanni,
Garlaschelli, Re Cecconi,
Chinaglia, Frustalupi, D'Amico.
How disgraceful.
True, because
I left out the reserves.
- Spare us the reserves.
- No way.
Our baby must respect players
like Facco, Badiani, Polentes
and his Mexican mustache.
- The Mexican too...
- He was a real hack.
Come on, babies want to hear
songs, lullabies.
Then get a load of this...
"Fly above the green field,
Lazio, you will never be alone."
Mom was fired,
and now what will we do!?
Enough!
Honey...
If we only buy items that are on sale,
we'll save 6.50 euros a week,
which is about 26 euros a month.
Or use that money for a sure bet
and double it in a flash.
Why, sure bets exist?
Under-over.
50% chance of winning.
This week Verona soccer team is over.
- How about getting a job?
- No, I don't want a boss anymore.
- 'Cause you're foul-tempered.
- Says you.
You'd be the world's greatest mechanic.
Like Marione said:
"He knows how to do one thing,
repairs cars."
Geez thanks, dad.
I'd love for you
to open your own shop.
Maybe we'll have a boy
and he could help you out.
What do you think?
Will you help out daddy?
- It's kicking, what's that mean?
- It's a girl.
Kicking like crazy.
Who is it?
Hey, Bronte.
What's up?
No cigarettes.
They're still available.
96 dark walnut chairs.
No problem.
Finish renovating, I'll keep
them in my warehouse for you.
What warehouse?
It'll just be a month, right?
A month?!
You're getting a real steal.
Thanks, bye.
- Where'll we keep these chairs?
- Here.
When the going gets tough,
your husband steps in!
- We've got all this space...
- No!
How many chairs are there?
- 100 or so.
- Are you nuts?
We have tons of space in the hallway.
And how'll we fit through?
Stefano and I go on vacation in October
because it's cheaper.
Last year the only other guest
at our motel was an old lady
carted around in a wheelchair
by her dopey carer.
But Stefano and I found it funny.
We were happy, the two of us together.
Then we'd go home,
meet up with friends
and tell them about our vacation...
It was more than enough for me.
Because I still had a job.
Repetitive, exhausting,
underpaid...
but at least it allowed us to get by.
It was shitty life, truth be told...
but that's what we got dealt.
And we were fine with it.
Can you pop a wheelie
with this spaceship?
Yes... but not in front of her.
Tonight, we have a Raf cover band.
When's the next catering gig?
The day after the twins' baptism.
I've got the hang of it now.
Did you know Fr. Ralph's
the only one who does baptisms?
- The colored guy?
- Yes.
- So what?
- I'm not crazy about that...
Rossana, are you racist?
Racist?
No, I have nothing against him.
But the photos...
Do we have to go?
- Yes.
- Just checking...
Who'd want to miss a Ref
cover band?
- You mean Raf?
- In English it's Ref, Ref...
Such idiots!
Stefano?
I have something to tell you.
It's a boy.
It's a boy?
It's a boy!
It's a boy?!
Right on!
It's a boy!
Wherever you may be...
Wherever I may be...
We will never let go...
If this is love, eternal love
Professor, it's odd seeing
the square so dead.
It's 11:00 in the morning,
everyone's at work.
Tell me about it.
You're so pretty,
you have your father's eyes.
But luckily you're not like him,
you're a reasonable person,
not a hothead like good old Marione.
Because... let me be straight with you,
with all of his union battles,
what did Marione
ever achieve?
Well, at least he called
a spade a spade.
He'd tell me: "Don't be a sheep
or the wolves will eat you!"
I'm just a simpleton,
I wish I were like him.
Darling, I know some sheep
who lived a happy life for 100 years
because they never
got above themselves.
All right, mom?
In Viterbo the driver will show you
what bus to take home.
Why the long face?
I'll see you soon.
I know,
but it's our first Christmas apart.
Don't worry,
I'm sure I'll get Easter off.
I don't know, I have a bad feeling...
Sweet Lord, and you say I'm negative!
What could possibly happen?
Relax.
- Take care.
- Okay.
Go, they're waiting...
When supper was ended,
he took the cup and gave thanks.
He gave it to his disciples and said:
"Take this and drink from it,
this is the cup of my blood,
of the new and everlasting covenant
shed for you and for all..."
Is that a brontosaurus leg?
No, they were out of it, this is lamb.
You don't find it sad
to eat alone on New Year's?
Well... I'm used to it.
- And you?
- It bothers me.
Do you have a beau, a boyfriend?
I've never had much luck with men.
Never? Not even puppy love?
Nothing?
Yes, once, a boy from town,
the son of my dad's farmhand...
Francesconi,
we went for a ride
to look at the stars.
Then he started groping me,
got on top of me and... did it.
But he didn't even give me a kiss...
I didn't like that.
That Francesconi is a real pig!
But I thought about
Francesconi for years.
Maybe if he'd gone slower,
had been more gentle,
it could've been a nice memory.
You've really depressed me now.
I have that effect on people.
And you? I heard about
what happened to you.
- Bad news.
- Yes, bad.
- How are things?
- How do you think?
I have Giovanni's photo on my wall,
it still keeps me up at night.
Well now you've depressed me!
I guess
I have that effect on people too.
Five, four, three, two, one...
- Happy new year!
- Same to you.
What a pain!
- Hi, baby.
- Hi.
Babe, will you fix the antenna?
- Now's not the time.
- And why not?
What's wrong?
That dickhead doesn't want
the chairs anymore.
What?
We spent all we had on them!
- You said it was a sure deal.
- He backed out.
It's not my fault.
Our bank account's empty,
our house is full of chairs,
now what'll we do?
I'll go do construction.
- Excuse me?
- Yes.
You've used up your voucher lessons,
renew for the month
and you'll get a 10% discount.
- How much would that be?
- 75 euros.
- So, shall we renew it?
- No, let me think it over.
I have a ton of things
to do this month so...
- Okay.
- Thanks.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Done.
But don't drive 200 km/h.
No worries, this car can't even
do 80 km/h downhill.
If you need chairs for the new place...
Sorry pal, we already have chairs.
Sorry the deal flopped,
time for you to get a job.
- Can you believe it?
- Yep...
- Give me a light.
- Here.
Here, light up with the sacred flame.
I'm leaving you in good company,
with your Lazio lighter.
- Dinner once we've settled in.
- Any time!
Bye.
Be good.
You deserve
the greatest things in the world.
- We're only moving 20 km away!
- Shut up.
- You'll see her at the catering gig.
- Hush.
Call you tonight, doll.
- Bye Stefano, be good.
- Bye, take care.
Baby?
How'd it go?
I need to shower.
Finardi!
Big-belly!
Hi.
How are you, when do you pop?
- In 8 weeks.
- Great.
I spoke to my doctor
and he said I could start working
in a few months
so I'm wondering if there's any news...
Especially since Stefano and I
are flat broke now.
Luciana, what can I say?
Let's wait.
Things change fast in here,
so don't worry, we'll find a way.
Just take one thing at a time!
- A tentative start date?
- Sorry. Hello?
Speaking. Hello!
Yes, tomorrow at 3:00 PM
with the samples of course.
No assistant, just me.
Look who's here,
watch your backside!
- She-male alert!
- Dumbass!
Quit busting her balls
every single day!
Mirko, I'll tell your mom on you!
Watch it, I'll clobber you.
I'll chuck my shoe at you!
How dare you say those things.
Didn't anyone teach you manners?
Get over here! People give birth
to dumbasses like this.
No worries, I'm used to it.
Here you go.
Enjoy.
Ma'am?
Salmon canapé, ma'am?
- Rossana?
- Yes, sir?
- Can I speak to you?
- Certainly.
- Fill those up.
- Okay.
Are you insane
bringing a pregnant woman
here to work?!
You were so pleased with her last time.
She's fine and can work perfectly...
Perfectly? If anything
happens to her it's my problem.
Nothing will happen.
If she suddenly faints while working,
what'll I do?
- Sir...
- Luciana, please.
I'm sorry for causing trouble.
I insisted on coming,
Rossana had nothing to do with it.
No, Rossana is my contact person
and must realize...
I can assure you I am fine.
- Luciana, don't.
- I'm fine.
I can see you're fine,
and I'm happy for you.
It's nothing personal but...
please don't insist.
Rossana, carry on with the buffet.
Ask your co-worker
to go home and rest now.
- You'll do without her.
- But I...
Your payment will obviously
remain as agreed.
But please leave now. Thanks.
These fucking chairs!
- Finished already?
- Yes.
Where's the rice I made?
I ate it.
There's prosciutto if you're hungry.
I am hungry
but I can't eat prosciutto.
- I'm pregnant, remember?
- I forgot you can't eat it.
You forgot...
Is it really that hard
to clear the dirty dishes?
What's with you? Quit nagging,
I didn't think about it.
Do you ever think about me?
- Why are you saying that?
- I don't ask for much.
Just a kind gesture now and then.
It doesn't take much to please me.
For example,
to celebrate the arrival of our baby
did it not occur to you
to buy a gift, a flower, a ring...
When the baby's born
of course I'll buy you a gift.
I don't want anything major,
I'm not demanding.
I know.
I'd just like a little attention.
You know me,
I don't think of these things.
Right, you don't have the time
to think of these things,
too much stuff to do...
What are you trying to say?
- What are you saying?
- Get lost.
Say it.
I bust my back for us both
and still fall for your bullshit ideas.
And not one has ever paid off!
But I'm the fool
for following along with you.
Some sweet deal...
Dumbass.
We're broke
with a house-full of chairs.
How will we put food on the table?
What'll we feed the baby, wood?
Rotten luck but it was a sweet deal.
- No, Stefano!
- Sweet deal!
It was a sweet deal.
Fine, whatever.
That's not work, that's a gamble!
We can't live on gambles,
we have to work!
With a pregnant wife,
a man who's not a selfish loser
would roll up his sleeves
and go to work all week long.
I went to the construction site,
didn't I?
Once... you only went once,
then came home moping
and threw the money at me.
Get out of my way.
I'm fucking sick of this shit!
And will you fix the fucking antenna!
When I was small
and my parents happened to fight,
Marione would leave,
slamming the door
and mom would wait up all night
for him to come home.
I always wanted to tell her:
"Go to sleep, he'll be back".
I promised myself I'd never do that,
but for better or worse
even if these things are wrong,
I found myself doing
the same things they did.
But that night
Stefano didn't come home.
Bronte?
- Hi.
- Hi, Stefano.
I'm having a cash flow
problem right now.
Remember those chairs
I told you about?
Not again, I said no.
I'll sell them to you for what I paid.
- I paid 1,000, look...
- It's still too much for me.
Pay me now and I'll halve the price.
- That's not worth it for you.
- I know.
But I have no choice.
I'm really in bad shape.
In that case, bring me the chairs.
Thanks.
INSUFFICIENT FUNDS
Damn it!
- You okay?
- Yes.
It's just nothing seems
to be working today.
Gotta go
before the greengrocer closes.
Fuck...
- Have you seen Stefano by chance?
- Stefano?
No, have you checked at the cafe?
- He's not there.
- You okay? What's wrong?
Everything's fine. Bye.
- Hi, Luciana.
- Hi, Pino.
How are you and the belly doing?
- Worn out but almost there...
- Good.
I don't want to stress you out
in a time like this
but your husband's
been giving me the runaround.
- That's not right.
- No, I'm really sorry.
He's just been crazy busy
with a work thing so...
There's always an excuse.
6 months behind on rent,
it's not peanuts.
- Can you give us another month...
- I've been doing that forever.
Luciana, I won't evict you
because I'm a good man
but I'm not a charity worker,
you know.
Ever heard of road rules?!
- He's at fault for rear-ending me!
- We'll verify it.
What's there to verify?
I pay your fucking salary!
Don't touch me!
- Zanzotto, will you come help me?
- Antonio!
Are you in a daze?
I was looking at you from inside...
I was just looking.
Coming to the town festival?
We're organizing it.
Yes. I'll go home and freshen up
since I rushed out to run errands.
I'm going home too,
to get my hair done.
Why don't you come?
You can tidy up.
No, thanks,
I left my wallet at home...
She's looking for new clients,
the first time is free.
- Dunno...
- Know her?
Manuela... that sweet lady...
Lady... man...
the super tall trannie!
Know her?
Come on.
- What a dumbass!
- Guys, it's no big deal.
You should've given me a hand
instead of standing there,
you asshole!
- But I didn't understand...
- What?
He attacked me,
what's there to understand?
You lucked out.
He's no partner, he's a dummy.
- You're going overboard.
- Let's tone it down.
You should be ashamed!
- Ashamed of what?
- Of what?
You got your partner killed!
Hey, I didn't get anyone killed,
is that clear?
You should be ashamed!
Were you there? No!
Did you know Giovanni?
He was like a son to me!
I raised Giovanni!
I told him:
"Let me go after him",
but he came along anyway.
When he turned around,
I saw he was 15 at most,
and I don't shoot kids!
So you let him shoot your partner?
Shithead!
Two seconds to decide.
- Can you decide in 2 seconds?
- If they're shooting my partner, yes.
You're paid to make decisions
in 2 seconds, asshole.
- Roccotelli!
- Come on, Stefano!
Roccotelli!
- I'm glad you like my work.
- Thanks.
- Tell your friends.
- Will do.
Sorry but I have to go.
Can leave my case here till tomorrow?
- Sure.
- Bye.
Thanks.
I'd better go too,
or I'll get stuck in the parade.
- Where'd I put my jacket?
- I don't know.
Here it is.
I don't think I'll go,
I don't feel like it anymore.
I might just stay home
and watch a movie
instead of having people
stare at my ass...
You know...
Finardi, can I have a word?
Hi, how are you?
You never let me know about the job.
We're at the festival now,
let's talk tomorrow.
And you never take my calls...
Excuse me.
I've got no say at Greenlife anymore,
they're going bust.
Right now the CEO and Saltutti
are having a meeting and may fire me.
I was counting on you,
you promised.
I know, but I can't solve
everyone's problems.
You can't just count on others,
learn to be fucking self-sufficient.
- Hold on.
- No, I have to go.
- Want to make me feel guilty?
- You're too tense now.
And I can't get upset
or my baby will start kicking.
I'm tense because that place
makes you become evil.
For 10 years I had to interact
with awful people,
smile at those monsters,
be tainted by their stench.
Well, I happen to miss
those awful monsters,
because I have no choice.
I was tainted by their stench too,
but since it was my bread and butter,
I didn't care.
The stench is much worse
when you have no job.
I feel like shit.
Mom was wrong, Mario.
Mom put up with things for 38 years,
but not you, don't be a sheep
or the wolves will eat you.
Don't give in, Mario!
Always ask why and how come.
Breathe down their necks,
don't let them get the upper hand.
And if they slap you, slap back!
React, Mario... react, my love.
Hey, what are you doing here?
I'm going to work at the club.
- Dressed like that?
- Yeah...
go-go dancers can't wear sweats.
You're a go-go dancer?
No, hold on.
Would you please stop?
Get lost, what the hell
do you want from me?
Come with me and let's talk it over.
I'm not going anywhere with you.
I was ashamed,
this situation isn't easy for me.
Antonio, get lost!
I want to apologize.
But I'm not ready
to have a "different" friend.
Different? Really?!
What's so different about me?
We'll get nowhere if
you attack my every word.
I meant different as in unconventional.
- Do you understand?
- Listen, honey...
I eat with my mouth like you.
The only thing different about me
is if I want to be a nurse,
they won't allow me to.
If I want to open a bank account,
they call the cops.
If I want to go to the town festival,
I have to endure people mocking me
all night long.
If I were a whore,
then nobody would be shocked.
Can I buy you a beer, Manuela?
Vale.
What are you doing here now?
I need to see Saltutti,
I know he's in a meeting.
Don't cause trouble,
you know you can't.
And why can't I?
They fired me, I have the right
to talk to him.
I know, but...
- Let them work.
- Why are you defending them?
Please, Luciana, leave.
I get it, sorry. Bye.
Bye, Luciana.
No, where are you going?
You'll get me in trouble!
Where are you going with that belly?
Luciana, don't get me in trouble.
Don't cause trouble, Luciana!
For chrissake!
- Saltutti, we have to fire people.
- I know that...
Excuse me.
- What's going on?
- I just want to talk to Saltutti.
Mrs. Colacci, now's not the time.
If you let me in,
I'll just be a minute.
What's all this ruckus?
You see, some time ago
I'd spoken to Mr. Finardi
who said I'd be given my job back...
Since I'm due any day now,
I could come back to work next month.
Mrs. Colacci, you should just focus
on your baby now.
Now catch your breath,
drink some water,
and I'll have you driven home.
All right.
But will you please rehire me?
I need this job.
I'm sorry for disturbing you,
but I beg you to help me.
No need to beg.
But you need to go home now, okay?
Okay...
So you'll rehire me?
You don't seem to understand.
You can't come here begging for work
while we're having a meeting
to safeguard our employees.
Plus, you're pregnant!
You shouldn't do these things now.
Everything will sort itself out,
but let's not lose our dignity,
it's essential.
What's wrong?
- Bruno, help her.
- Come with me.
Make sure she sees a doctor.
- What is it?
- Contractions.
Breathe deeply.
- Are you sure you feel better?
- Yes, I'm fine now.
- Can I call someone?
- I'm fine.
Okay.
Some fresh air will do you good.
- Yes.
- Bye, Luciana.
Everything will sort itself out,
you'll see.
Everything will sort itself out.
Hey!
- Don't, it's loaded.
- Let me in.
- Luciana, calm down.
- No!
I won't calm down,
I'm fucking fed up!
- No, Luciana.
- Move!
Move!
Luciana,
what are you doing with that gun?
Don't move!
Of all times to wake up...
- Drop the gun.
- No, drop yours.
Did you hear Luciana?
Lower your gun.
- Why?
- Why doesn't matter...
We both have kids.
You lower it too, Luciana!
I'm in the middle.
- Don't move!
- You don't move.
Damn you, lower that gun!
We both know you'd never shoot.
Did you hear that?
That was a gunshot.
Let me go back and see.
Know what?
Dignity is a word
you shouldn't even pronounce.
I came here before
to talk to you politely,
and you treated me like a poor sucker.
- I was trying...
- Like a piece of garbage.
You think I'd be here
if I weren't really in need?
- I understand but...
- I want my life back.
I want my measly salary back!
I want to work here
for the rest of my life!
I want to be rewarded
for bringing a child into this world,
that's all I ask!
Give me my job back!
Antonio...
Be careful!
Holy shit...
I'm going in.
You stay here, don't move.
Take this.
No, I don't want anyone to get hurt,
we don't need it.
Bruno?
Be careful.
It was a shitty life, truth be told,
but that's what we got dealt
and we were fine with it.
Now I want my life back.
Of course, yes...
Luciana...
Leave, this doesn't involve you.
Relax, lower the gun.
- Yes, lower the gun.
- Shut up!
- Oh God!
- Call an ambulance.
- Call an ambulance.
- Yes, I will.
Look at me, look at me...
Lower that gun.
No, I won't!
Then point it at me.
Look at me, point it at me.
- What do you want?
- Calm down, Luciana.
It's not worth it... not for them.
Be reasonable.
They don't want
to be reasonable with me.
Get rid of the gun anyway.
I don't have one, see?
Just talk to me...
think about your baby,
he'll suffer the consequences.
Don't be crazy.
I'm not crazy...
I'm tired.
I'm tired.
Good.
Police!
Drop the gun.
- No!
- Step aside.
No and don't move or I'll open fire!
No! Stay calm, Christ,
or someone will get hurt!
Officer, arrest that nutcase!
Shut up, asshole!
Just ignore him,
she's not crazy, she's just confused.
I'm not confused, rehire me
or I won't drop the gun.
Luciana.
It's just me and you...
Look at me, Bruno.
It's just me and you...
- Luciana!
- I said to stay in the car!
Ma'am, drop the gun
or I'll be forced to shoot.
- No shooting!
- Move aside.
Bruno...
what should I do?
Luciana, do what the cop says.
Luciana, do what Antonio says.
He won't hurt you.
She's in pain,
call an ambulance, please!
I won't call an ambulance
unless she drops the gun.
Ma'am, I'm telling you
to lower the gun!
Luciana...
Sweetheart!
You'll be fine, my love...
Someone's been wounded.
By a shot, a gun,
by a gunshot!
Ma'am, push.
Come on!
Come on, honey...
Mario...
We have to call him Mario,
like my dad.
Okay, baby.
Mario!
Mario!
Coming!
Where were you?
- Playing ball.
- Always playing ball...
Give me the 16.
I said 16...
- I messed up?
- Yep.
No problem, I'll handle it.
Clean it up with that rag.
Let's get to work now.
My Mario weighed 3 kg at birth,
and he didn't shed a single tear.
His eyes were open and he looked
at everyone as if he knew them.
He had a proud, bold look
on his face,
like a small, quiet warrior.
Everyone in town calls him
"Luciana's son".
When I tell him how he was born
he looks wide-eyed at me and says:
"Tell me again, mom!"
Maybe it's wrong to, but
at least I'm telling him the truth.
Our Lord said that
the last shall be the first
but he didn't exactly say...
when.
or I'll be forced to shoot.
- What should I do?
- Do what the cop says.
Ma'am, I'm telling you
to lower the gun!
No! I won't!
..and the Holy Spirit.
As it was in the beginning,
is now and ever shall be,
world without end, amen.
Hail Mary, full of grace,
the Lord is with thee...
Not again!
Blessed is the fruit
of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, mother of God...
Morning, Mrs. Gina,
morning, ladies.
THE LAST WILL BE LAST
You didn't go to mass?
- Hey, Luciana.
- Hi.
Come here!
Hi, Enzo!
You bought a new stroller?
Yep, we bought this spaceship.
- Hey, doll!
- Doll, how are you?
I haven't seen them in 2 weeks,
they've grown so much.
Those legs need to be nibbled!
- What took you so long?
- I took the host.
You should take the pill instead.
Don't say that!
Children are blessings from God.
Four blessings is a lot!
He could've give some to Luciana,
she doesn't have any.
Shut up!
- I made a joke.
- Don't, because you're no good at it.
Lia, how are you?
Darling.
I said a prayer for your dear mom,
I miss her so much.
- Thanks.
- Can I ask you a favor?
Can you help my granddaughter
find a job? Please?
It's not easy nowadays,
but I'll see what I can do.
Hey, pals!
Did you go to confession?
Did you fess up?
Mrs. Lia, did you?
Hope so...
- Let's take a selfie.
- Mrs. Lia too!
Stand near me.
Hold my bag.
Squeeze together
so we're all in it. Ready?
Rossana,
can you smile at least today?
Simona, when will you marry
and settle down?
When your husband stops sexting me!
Liar!
Buffalo mozzarella
doesn't exist in Slovenia,
we'd make a killing there!
My friend sells limoncello
in California.
Now he's got a mansion
and two blondes who serve him drinks.
You've got a wife
who made you a casserole.
- Hey, sweetheart.
- Yeah, right...
Give Marione's daughter
some pastries.
Just call me Luciana!
- Oh well, Luciana...
- Professor!
We're still so fond of Marione,
God rest his soul.
A true warrior and motivator.
He had spirit till the very end.
He only weighed 40 kg, but never
stopped cheating on your mom.
Thanks for that lovely reminder.
Well, Zanzotto...
I've never met
a dishonorably transferred agent before.
You sure mucked things up
in your town.
- It shouldn't have happened...
- Silence.
Because of you,
people no longer trust us.
Things will be different here:
you'll do highway patrol.
So you won't screw anything up.
Sir.
She's Caputo, your partner,
the only one who didn't refuse
to partner with you.
Will we both be able
to fit into the car?
I wouldn't joke if I were you.
Next time, you won't get off
with just a transfer.
Be very careful, Zanzotto.
And pray nothing happens
or you'll be on your ass.
Yes, sir.
Look out, as of today criminals
have their days numbered!
Lethal Weapon is here!
Enjoy...
Want some gum?
We're on the air live,
don't show me up.
I won't, as long as you strip naked!
No way!
Naked! Naked!
These two are so funny.
Geez, why can't I listen to
the radio in peace?
Where are my glasses?
- Here. Will you fix the antenna?
- Yes.
- Hold it!
- What?
You look like
you've gone through the grinder.
I have to go.
What's the rush?
A sweet deal in the works...
- Try and make a buck or two.
- Yes, kiss.
- Hi.
- Hello.
- I got here early.
- That's good.
These are the offices,
we work on the other side.
- Morning, Bruno.
- Luciana, good morning.
Omelet sandwich for breakfast?
Of course, and for lunch a sandwich
with a pepper omelet.
Nice diet...
- This is Matilde.
- It's a pleasure... sorry...
- Bruno Sebastiani, it's a pleasure.
- Likewise.
This useless human here is Ruggero.
On rare occasions he even wakes up.
Careful, it's a narrow passage.
Thanks.
Step one: the iron.
See, while the timer's on
you come here and do the hair.
We'll use this as an example.
- You rake out the hair.
- Rake out?
- Untangle it.
- I see...
You try untangling it.
No, it got stuck because...
because you pulled down,
so it gets stuck, see?
- Right.
- See?
Do it this way and it slides smoothly.
Hold on, the iron is ready now.
Forceful.
No, not like that
or the timer won't start. Okay?
Try again.
Careful, it's hot.
Go!
Well done!
Grab the hair.
Not with two hands,
we're not in the jungle.
- Use the left hand, okay?
- Got it.
Careful, these are sharp.
Make sure to give it your all.
He is very...
- Hi, Luciana.
- Be smart.
- Hi, Tommaso.
- Hello.
- She's the temp?
- She just moved here...
- How'd the tryout go?
- Very well, she did a great job.
I'll be honest,
we're not offering a yearly contract,
I just need a 3-month replacement
for Teresa.
Then we'll see
when she comes back... okay?
Okay, that's awesome.
Thanks.
Thanks, Tommaso.
And my contract renewal?
- You don't even need to ask...
- Thanks.
- Who is it?
- Zanzotto, Antonio Zanzotto.
The chief gave me your address
for the room for rent.
- Come in.
- Hello.
The kitchen.
Bathroom with hot water.
The room, the mattress is new.
My husband only used it for a month
then he died.
Great.
The hairdresser is waiting in there
to do my hair.
Go ahead, ma'am.
- I'll close the door.
- Thanks.
No, the razors!
Holy shit, what is that?
Let us acknowledge our sins
to celebrate the sacred mysteries.
I confess to almighty God, to my
brothers and sisters that I have sinned
in my thoughts and words,
what I have done and failed to do,
through my fault,
through my most grievous fault...
- Excuse me, ma'am?
- Yes?
How come I hear the mass
in the sink?
It's because of the antennas.
Handy, isn't it?
- I hear the mass in bed!
- Very handy.
You okay, Mr. Antonio?
Yes, I was wondering if
you happen to have a disposable razor.
- No, sorry.
- I do.
Here, it's new, you can keep it.
- Thanks.
- No problem.
- I'm Antonio.
- Hi, Manuela.
Excuse me.
Wait, miss!
I'll help you with that.
- Thanks.
- Let me.
- I'm not used to people helping.
- No?
- In the car?
- Yes.
- Open the trunk.
- Yes.
Go ahead, thanks.
- Stick it in the back.
- Okay.
Thanks.
- All set.
- Very kind of you.
- I must repay the favor.
- It's no big deal.
No, I insist.
Then you can offer me coffee
next time.
- Okay.
- But I'll pay!
- Then you'd be offering!
- That's all right.
- Thanks again.
- Goodbye.
- Guys, let's make a toast.
- What's the occasion?
He got a loan for the new house.
Bleeding me dry...
I'll be paying even after I'm dead.
Enzo, that's how it is
for everyone nowadays.
When will you be moving?
It should be ready in a few months.
Rossana and I haven't been apart
for more than a week since birth.
We need to get our kids
away from these antennas
or they'll end up
like your mom and dad.
- Why on earth would you say that?
- I can't say a fucking thing!
Last one there pays for drinks!
- He outruns his opponents and wins!
- He's such a kid.
Don't take off your shirt in public.
- Why?
- You give me goosebumps.
So do you, even when you're dressed.
And when you get angry...
Oh baby!
- No biting.
- A little bite...
- You'll scar me.
- Come on, I like it...
Don't stop or I'll divorce you.
No way, I can't afford to pay alimony.
- Ora pro nobis...
- What's that?
- Ora pro nobis.
- That's a real turn-off.
- St. Rita of Cascia.
- Ora pro nobis!
- St. Paul the Apostle.
- Ora pro nobis.
How long do you have to
hold that pose?
- It said a few hours online.
- Damn, those sperms are slow.
- That's what it said.
- Maybe it'll help if I do it too.
- Dummy.
- I make you laugh.
- You sure do.
- Gimme a kiss.
- Ouch, I've got a cramp.
- Just put your legs down.
Colacci... here you go.
Thanks.
Either do business well or not at all.
You're right.
Sorry, it's a client,
give me a minute.
- Sorry to interrupt your sweet deal.
- What is it?
- Huh?
- Understand?
I don't understand.
How'd the deal go?
That's what I meant... well!
Will they deliver the parcel?
Hope it's a female parcel.
Yes!
- Any cravings?
- Watermelon.
Where'll I find one in November?
- I was kidding.
- I knew that...
- Bye, baby.
- Bye.
What can I get for you?
Sambuca with a coffee bean.
Okay.
- Antonio, sambuca?
- Yes.
- That's pretty old-fashioned.
- I guess.
For you... miss?
A Spritz.
I'm from the 21 st century.
- A Spritz for the lady.
- Okay.
Thanks, you can go.
How long have you been in Italy?
I came here more or less in 2000.
- You were just a little girl.
- No.
I was already developed.
Why are they staring at us?
Who knows.
Bet they wish they were me,
sitting close to you.
- I doubt it.
- No?
They've never seen me out with a man
since I got here.
I see...
I consider myself lucky then,
hot damn!
Mrs. Colacci,
Mr. Saltutti wants to see you.
- Saltutti?
- Yes.
- Wow... wonder what for.
- Dunno.
- Sir...
- Have a seat.
- How are you, Luciana?
- Fine, thanks.
A bit surprised,
you've never called me in before.
Did I do something wrong?
Luciana,
I'll get straight to the point.
Okay.
I can't renew your contract.
- Meaning?
- You understood.
You're firing me?
No, we're not renewing your contract.
Same thing.
I'm sorry,
but we'll have to manage without you.
But I can't manage without you.
What'll I do?
I'm sorry, it's not up to me,
I'm just doing my job
and I assure you it's not easy.
But in your condition, how much longer
will you be able to work?
- My condition?
- Luciana, you're pregnant.
Were you going to tell us
after the renewal?
- Does that seem fair?
- No, I would've told you.
And I certainly can't ask you
to forgo pregnancy.
- Why, would that make a difference?
- Well...
I see.
Luciana...
You would've been showing
in 2 months...
But in 2 months my contract
would've been renewed, you bitch!
You should be ashamed of yourself.
- And what you say to her instead?
- What'd I say...
Nothing.
You could've told Saltutti
the pregnancy isn't a sure thing.
- It's not the first time...
- Hoping for a miscarriage?
- No, but if it happens again...
- It won't.
- I don't want you to be upset.
- It won't happen again.
It'll be fine this time, I can feel it.
Okay, it won't happen again.
My father was a mechanic,
his name was Mario.
He'd take me to the hills
to see the sunset and tell me stories.
Not Little Red Riding Hood
or Snow White...
He told me when he was a kid
he'd steal cheese from German soldiers
for my grandma.
Once he won the lottery
and bought a Fiat 500.
And to win over mom he exchanged blows
with Belotti the bully.
Marione told me stories
about him reacting.
And then he'd mock me
because I never reacted.
Finardi!
Hold up!
What were you thinking?
Meaning? You make it sound like
I got up to mischief.
I've been trying for 10 years,
I have every right!
Why didn't you tell me?
Saltutti knew and I didn't.
How can I fucking help you
if you don't talk to me?
You're right.
All you can do now is
wait till the next renewal in 6 months.
Just don't forget about me.
Leave it to me.
- Thanks.
- I still think you screwed up.
- Bruno?
- Luciana...
- I wanted to say bye.
- I just can't believe it...
You won't be here tomorrow.
You're telling me,
I've been working here forever.
No, Luciana, don't do that!
You're always so cheerful,
don't fall apart now!
Come on.
Finardi is a slick bastard,
he'll get you back in.
You'll have a job again soon.
- Hope so.
- Trust me.
I'd drive you home,
but I'm here alone.
- Say bye to him when he wakes up.
- If he wakes up.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Hi, mom.
Toni! Don't just stand there,
come help me.
You're always sulking.
Don't drop the codfish, Toni.
Don't call me Toni, I hate it.
All right Toni, but let's go
because I need to tinkle.
Okay.
Careful, that drawer is broken.
A miracle has occurred...
I heard the holy mass for free!
It was coming from the sink.
- Do you usually pay for the mass?
- I leave a donation.
Mom, it's not a miracle.
It's radiation from the antennas
which is bad for you,
sooner or later it'll make me sick.
This place is not heaven, it's hell.
Sweet Mary, you're always so negative.
I'll heat you up some codfish.
Codfish now?
It's 5:00 in the afternoon...
Perfect time for a snack.
Fine.
Honey, you're not the first or last
person who's been fired.
Say it louder, they didn't hear you
in the next town over.
We'll roll up our sleeves now.
- Who, you?
- That's not fair.
I'm closing a sweet deal
and you'll get your job back.
What deal is that?
Buying Rastelli's discarded chairs,
they're practically free.
- Free?
- No, but dirt cheap.
I already found a buyer,
he needs them for his restaurant.
No, we don't have a cent.
We'll sell them for double the price.
Trust me for once.
All right.
- Hi, Stefano.
- Not him...
- Can I talk to you?
- Sure.
- I'll just steal him a second.
- Go ahead.
How's it going?
Hi, professor.
I swear I'll sort it out.
Give me 20 days, I'm closing a deal.
- So you don't have the money?
- Not now.
- I'll wait till this bad spell's over.
- Thanks.
- But don't make me come look for you.
- Of course.
What's up? Your landlord's
come looking for money?
I'm terribly ashamed...
what's more, Stefano
had one of his brilliant ideas again.
Oh hell...
Why not come do catering with us
for a while?
We'll split the earnings three ways
till you get the job back.
Rossana, what can I say?
Thanks.
Canapé?
Care for a canapé?
- Bubbly, sir?
- Thanks, Rossana.
How long did renovations take?
Two years,
but she took care of it all.
- Nonsense.
- She slogged away.
She chose the architect,
contractor, decor... I did nothing.
- It was no big deal.
- She did it all.
- Excuse me.
- No, thanks.
Happy birthday dear Giulia,
happy birthday to you!
Happy birthday, honey.
A great birthday
requires a great gift,
so I happen to have
a little something for you.
- Here, honey.
- Thanks.
It's gorgeous, honey.
It's stunning, thanks.
Times are tough...
This year we lost
400,000 euros in net profits.
But Raimondo hit it big
with those betting centers.
I can't complain, I just opened
my sixth one, things are good.
- Do you gamble too?
- Are you crazy? Never.
No, I make a profit
off those poor fools who gamble.
Damn Sampdoria team,
I lost 300 euros on a bet!
- Sampdoria still?
- So what?
- It's like the Lazio team.
- No soccer, please.
- Who picked this place?
- Enzo.
- Online coupon.
- 9.90 euros!
- Are you nuts?
- What'll we eat?
Welcome to "The Codfather",
we serve traditional Roman dishes
revamped with fish.
Pastas: amatriciana with fish,
carbonara with fish,
- or gricia...
- With fish...
Second courses: grilled squid,
sweet and sour bass,
codfish fillet, or stewed cuttlefish.
Or steamed angler fish
with vegetables.
How fancy!
Or even broiled lavaret with potatoes.
- So it's not just fish?
- No, dumbass.
Isn't Lavaret that bird
that swims in oil spills?
That's a cormorant!
I recommend it,
it's very delicate and very...
Side dishes: chicory and mixed greens.
How about some ceviche?
- No, she can't.
- No raw fish for me.
- Congratulations.
- Thanks.
I know what I want.
Gricia, mixed greens, chicory,
and just two pieces of codfish.
Eating light, I see...
- Don't be shy, eat something!
- Shut up, I'm hungry!
Pregnancy weight is hard to lose.
Quit being nasty!
- How about some assorted starters?
- Yes.
- Still or sparkling water?
- Both.
Excuse me, never mind...
I wanted to ask
if they have any fish dishes.
So...
I'll buy you the good luck onesie
for when it's born
since you're like a sister to me.
You're going to make me cry!
- Rossana, come on!
- What?
The poor thing's a hormonal mess.
You're gonna make her croak!
Crybaby, I spoke to my sister,
she can lend you
her old playpen and walker.
- So don't buy them.
- All right.
Hand-me-downs are great,
babies outgrow things so fast.
I'll give you crib sheets,
they're practically new
since my little leeches
would only sleep in our bed.
Don't mention them today,
it's like a dream to have a day off.
Happy birthday to you...
A fish-shaped cake!
Happy birthday dear Stefano,
happy birthday to you!
Ready?
- I'll cut it.
- Will you fillet it?
- Happy birthday, baby.
- Wonder what it is...
- I'm dying to know.
- What is it?
It's awesome, thanks baby!
In your face! In your face!
- Why'd you buy that?
- He kept hounding me...
Careful where you leave it,
someone might steal it.
While we were in the Champions League,
you were in the kiddie league!
- League 2!
- I'll light up in your face.
This is from us.
She's the brains behind it.
We'll accept anything.
"Gift certificate for a crib".
- Darling!
- Thanks so much.
This is from us.
Hope you like it...
- You'd better!
- Look...
It's a voucher
for five pool workout sessions.
- Prenatal sessions...
- I thought it was my birthday!
- It cost 150 euros!
- Aren't you classy?
A drop above the rest,
your friend here.
If he were my friend, he would've
just handed him cash.
If we didn't buy it for Luciana
you would've had to.
Of course! I would've bought it...
Yeah...
So... Moretti,
Iacobelli, and Corsetti
are lucky and have December 24
till January 2 off.
Roccotelli and Brugna are spared
for December 25 and 26,
you start vacation
at the end of the week.
At most I'll be on the couch
eating fruitcake.
Silence...
Caputo and Zanzotto will be on duty.
Figures...
Sorry sir...
You promised me I could take
my mom home for Christmas.
Promised? I don't make promises.
Ever.
You could ask a colleague
to swap shifts.
Who'll give up their vacation
for Zanzotto?
Sorry... you'll have to put mom
on a bus then. All right?
Antonio! Look!
There's a surprise for you.
- Manuela, how much do I owe you?
- No...
The first time is free,
you can pay next time.
- Are you sure?
- Yes, your mom is so sweet.
I took the liberty of doing
something... Want to see?
Come along.
- Voila.
- How lovely, what is it?
A coatrack.
It represents l'arbro de la vida,
that means the tree of life.
I noticed you toss your clothes
on a chair and they get arrugan...
- They get...
- They get creased... true.
- It's better this way.
- Yes.
- Are you upset?
- No.
- Is it too colorful?
- No, it's wonderful.
- Did I overstep the bounds?
- Nonsense.
You're so kind.
Thank you.
And you're always so kind to me.
It's the least I can do.
Okay, bye.
Antonio, I have an idea:
Saturday I'll take you to Cesano
to eat some great pasta.
Okay, great idea...
- Bye.
- Bye, see you Saturday.
- Careful going down the stairs.
- Okay.
Mom?
- Where are you?
- In the bathroom.
Come in.
What are you doing?
I can hear it better from the toilet.
..and I ask the blessed Mary,
ever virgin...
- Don't you look lovely?
- Indeed.
And also with you...
Amen!
Mom, listen.
I'm sorry but they screwed up
my vacation days,
I have to work on Christmas.
- Yes.
- But I have to go back to town.
I can't neglect your sisters
and their kids at Christmas!
I know.
So tell me... what do you think
about that lady, like her?
Yes, what can I say...
she's a good man.
What do you mean, man?
Toni... are you just plain stupid?
There's nothing wrong
with having an invert friend.
What does that have to do
with Manuela? She's a woman.
Toni, her name's Manuel
and she's manlier than you.
- You think?
- Yes.
Let us pray...
Our Father, who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name...
Manuela!
What is it, Antonio?
Sweet Jesus, she's a man.
You played the lady with me...
Antonio, let go!
I introduced you to my mom.
We sat at the cafe
in front of everyone.
What an ass I made of myself...
Thanks to you, everyone in town
will think I'm a faggot!
- Why didn't you say anything?
- Everyone here knows.
Don't get any funny ideas,
people like you gross me out.
Why?
Do you think you're so cool?
I liked you because you were kind,
but you're just fake.
Me, fake? You're fake!
And a fraud!
Bet I know how
you made a living before...
Buddy, I'm a hairdresser now
and I work in clubs on weekends.
I'm an honest, upright person
who makes good choices.
And what about you, Antonio?
Rumor has it you're incapable
of making good choices.
Bye.
Keep making circles
with your arms underwater.
Forward and back...
Amazing, I feel like I weigh 20 kg!
Right?
Wish we could do this every day.
Move the legs and turn sideways...
Move forward with a breaststroke...
Here comes the collector...
- Collector of what?
- Take a guess!
What's she wearing, dental floss?
I'd wear that too if I had her body.
Poor fool is falling for her...
Little does he know
that she devours men after mating.
What's the problem?
She's pretty, single,
why can't she have fun?
I like her...
Alternate the legs...
Luciana, congrats!
- Thanks, doll.
- I heard the news, awesome!
I already can't stand her...
Limber your hips, fatso!
It says we should be talking
to the baby in the womb
because it understands.
Apparently, newborns sleep
up to 16 hours a day.
But they wake up every 3 hours.
You made your bed, now lie in it.
And baby food is super expensive.
How'll we manage?
The chair money will save us.
I should've said no
to that chair deal.
- But you said yes.
- Not really.
You always say yes to me.
You said yes
when I first kissed you,
and 30 minutes after
when I want to bonk...
- How romantic.
- You said yes to marriage.
Well, I just say yes out of pity.
It's cold.
- Where the hell are my pajamas?
- Same place as always.
- Same place?
- Here.
If it's a girl
we should call her Asia.
No way.
We can't call a suburban kid Asia.
- And if it's a boy?
- I was thinking about Mario.
- Like your dad.
- Yes.
I don't want to impose though...
- It's old-fashioned.
- It's classic.
- We'll decide later.
- My baby must be a Lazio fan.
- Figures.
- Let me have a chat with your belly.
Line-up of Lazio
1973-1974 Italian champions:
Pulici, Petrelli, Martini,
Wilson, Oddi, Nanni,
Garlaschelli, Re Cecconi,
Chinaglia, Frustalupi, D'Amico.
How disgraceful.
True, because
I left out the reserves.
- Spare us the reserves.
- No way.
Our baby must respect players
like Facco, Badiani, Polentes
and his Mexican mustache.
- The Mexican too...
- He was a real hack.
Come on, babies want to hear
songs, lullabies.
Then get a load of this...
"Fly above the green field,
Lazio, you will never be alone."
Mom was fired,
and now what will we do!?
Enough!
Honey...
If we only buy items that are on sale,
we'll save 6.50 euros a week,
which is about 26 euros a month.
Or use that money for a sure bet
and double it in a flash.
Why, sure bets exist?
Under-over.
50% chance of winning.
This week Verona soccer team is over.
- How about getting a job?
- No, I don't want a boss anymore.
- 'Cause you're foul-tempered.
- Says you.
You'd be the world's greatest mechanic.
Like Marione said:
"He knows how to do one thing,
repairs cars."
Geez thanks, dad.
I'd love for you
to open your own shop.
Maybe we'll have a boy
and he could help you out.
What do you think?
Will you help out daddy?
- It's kicking, what's that mean?
- It's a girl.
Kicking like crazy.
Who is it?
Hey, Bronte.
What's up?
No cigarettes.
They're still available.
96 dark walnut chairs.
No problem.
Finish renovating, I'll keep
them in my warehouse for you.
What warehouse?
It'll just be a month, right?
A month?!
You're getting a real steal.
Thanks, bye.
- Where'll we keep these chairs?
- Here.
When the going gets tough,
your husband steps in!
- We've got all this space...
- No!
How many chairs are there?
- 100 or so.
- Are you nuts?
We have tons of space in the hallway.
And how'll we fit through?
Stefano and I go on vacation in October
because it's cheaper.
Last year the only other guest
at our motel was an old lady
carted around in a wheelchair
by her dopey carer.
But Stefano and I found it funny.
We were happy, the two of us together.
Then we'd go home,
meet up with friends
and tell them about our vacation...
It was more than enough for me.
Because I still had a job.
Repetitive, exhausting,
underpaid...
but at least it allowed us to get by.
It was shitty life, truth be told...
but that's what we got dealt.
And we were fine with it.
Can you pop a wheelie
with this spaceship?
Yes... but not in front of her.
Tonight, we have a Raf cover band.
When's the next catering gig?
The day after the twins' baptism.
I've got the hang of it now.
Did you know Fr. Ralph's
the only one who does baptisms?
- The colored guy?
- Yes.
- So what?
- I'm not crazy about that...
Rossana, are you racist?
Racist?
No, I have nothing against him.
But the photos...
Do we have to go?
- Yes.
- Just checking...
Who'd want to miss a Ref
cover band?
- You mean Raf?
- In English it's Ref, Ref...
Such idiots!
Stefano?
I have something to tell you.
It's a boy.
It's a boy?
It's a boy!
It's a boy?!
Right on!
It's a boy!
Wherever you may be...
Wherever I may be...
We will never let go...
If this is love, eternal love
Professor, it's odd seeing
the square so dead.
It's 11:00 in the morning,
everyone's at work.
Tell me about it.
You're so pretty,
you have your father's eyes.
But luckily you're not like him,
you're a reasonable person,
not a hothead like good old Marione.
Because... let me be straight with you,
with all of his union battles,
what did Marione
ever achieve?
Well, at least he called
a spade a spade.
He'd tell me: "Don't be a sheep
or the wolves will eat you!"
I'm just a simpleton,
I wish I were like him.
Darling, I know some sheep
who lived a happy life for 100 years
because they never
got above themselves.
All right, mom?
In Viterbo the driver will show you
what bus to take home.
Why the long face?
I'll see you soon.
I know,
but it's our first Christmas apart.
Don't worry,
I'm sure I'll get Easter off.
I don't know, I have a bad feeling...
Sweet Lord, and you say I'm negative!
What could possibly happen?
Relax.
- Take care.
- Okay.
Go, they're waiting...
When supper was ended,
he took the cup and gave thanks.
He gave it to his disciples and said:
"Take this and drink from it,
this is the cup of my blood,
of the new and everlasting covenant
shed for you and for all..."
Is that a brontosaurus leg?
No, they were out of it, this is lamb.
You don't find it sad
to eat alone on New Year's?
Well... I'm used to it.
- And you?
- It bothers me.
Do you have a beau, a boyfriend?
I've never had much luck with men.
Never? Not even puppy love?
Nothing?
Yes, once, a boy from town,
the son of my dad's farmhand...
Francesconi,
we went for a ride
to look at the stars.
Then he started groping me,
got on top of me and... did it.
But he didn't even give me a kiss...
I didn't like that.
That Francesconi is a real pig!
But I thought about
Francesconi for years.
Maybe if he'd gone slower,
had been more gentle,
it could've been a nice memory.
You've really depressed me now.
I have that effect on people.
And you? I heard about
what happened to you.
- Bad news.
- Yes, bad.
- How are things?
- How do you think?
I have Giovanni's photo on my wall,
it still keeps me up at night.
Well now you've depressed me!
I guess
I have that effect on people too.
Five, four, three, two, one...
- Happy new year!
- Same to you.
What a pain!
- Hi, baby.
- Hi.
Babe, will you fix the antenna?
- Now's not the time.
- And why not?
What's wrong?
That dickhead doesn't want
the chairs anymore.
What?
We spent all we had on them!
- You said it was a sure deal.
- He backed out.
It's not my fault.
Our bank account's empty,
our house is full of chairs,
now what'll we do?
I'll go do construction.
- Excuse me?
- Yes.
You've used up your voucher lessons,
renew for the month
and you'll get a 10% discount.
- How much would that be?
- 75 euros.
- So, shall we renew it?
- No, let me think it over.
I have a ton of things
to do this month so...
- Okay.
- Thanks.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Done.
But don't drive 200 km/h.
No worries, this car can't even
do 80 km/h downhill.
If you need chairs for the new place...
Sorry pal, we already have chairs.
Sorry the deal flopped,
time for you to get a job.
- Can you believe it?
- Yep...
- Give me a light.
- Here.
Here, light up with the sacred flame.
I'm leaving you in good company,
with your Lazio lighter.
- Dinner once we've settled in.
- Any time!
Bye.
Be good.
You deserve
the greatest things in the world.
- We're only moving 20 km away!
- Shut up.
- You'll see her at the catering gig.
- Hush.
Call you tonight, doll.
- Bye Stefano, be good.
- Bye, take care.
Baby?
How'd it go?
I need to shower.
Finardi!
Big-belly!
Hi.
How are you, when do you pop?
- In 8 weeks.
- Great.
I spoke to my doctor
and he said I could start working
in a few months
so I'm wondering if there's any news...
Especially since Stefano and I
are flat broke now.
Luciana, what can I say?
Let's wait.
Things change fast in here,
so don't worry, we'll find a way.
Just take one thing at a time!
- A tentative start date?
- Sorry. Hello?
Speaking. Hello!
Yes, tomorrow at 3:00 PM
with the samples of course.
No assistant, just me.
Look who's here,
watch your backside!
- She-male alert!
- Dumbass!
Quit busting her balls
every single day!
Mirko, I'll tell your mom on you!
Watch it, I'll clobber you.
I'll chuck my shoe at you!
How dare you say those things.
Didn't anyone teach you manners?
Get over here! People give birth
to dumbasses like this.
No worries, I'm used to it.
Here you go.
Enjoy.
Ma'am?
Salmon canapé, ma'am?
- Rossana?
- Yes, sir?
- Can I speak to you?
- Certainly.
- Fill those up.
- Okay.
Are you insane
bringing a pregnant woman
here to work?!
You were so pleased with her last time.
She's fine and can work perfectly...
Perfectly? If anything
happens to her it's my problem.
Nothing will happen.
If she suddenly faints while working,
what'll I do?
- Sir...
- Luciana, please.
I'm sorry for causing trouble.
I insisted on coming,
Rossana had nothing to do with it.
No, Rossana is my contact person
and must realize...
I can assure you I am fine.
- Luciana, don't.
- I'm fine.
I can see you're fine,
and I'm happy for you.
It's nothing personal but...
please don't insist.
Rossana, carry on with the buffet.
Ask your co-worker
to go home and rest now.
- You'll do without her.
- But I...
Your payment will obviously
remain as agreed.
But please leave now. Thanks.
These fucking chairs!
- Finished already?
- Yes.
Where's the rice I made?
I ate it.
There's prosciutto if you're hungry.
I am hungry
but I can't eat prosciutto.
- I'm pregnant, remember?
- I forgot you can't eat it.
You forgot...
Is it really that hard
to clear the dirty dishes?
What's with you? Quit nagging,
I didn't think about it.
Do you ever think about me?
- Why are you saying that?
- I don't ask for much.
Just a kind gesture now and then.
It doesn't take much to please me.
For example,
to celebrate the arrival of our baby
did it not occur to you
to buy a gift, a flower, a ring...
When the baby's born
of course I'll buy you a gift.
I don't want anything major,
I'm not demanding.
I know.
I'd just like a little attention.
You know me,
I don't think of these things.
Right, you don't have the time
to think of these things,
too much stuff to do...
What are you trying to say?
- What are you saying?
- Get lost.
Say it.
I bust my back for us both
and still fall for your bullshit ideas.
And not one has ever paid off!
But I'm the fool
for following along with you.
Some sweet deal...
Dumbass.
We're broke
with a house-full of chairs.
How will we put food on the table?
What'll we feed the baby, wood?
Rotten luck but it was a sweet deal.
- No, Stefano!
- Sweet deal!
It was a sweet deal.
Fine, whatever.
That's not work, that's a gamble!
We can't live on gambles,
we have to work!
With a pregnant wife,
a man who's not a selfish loser
would roll up his sleeves
and go to work all week long.
I went to the construction site,
didn't I?
Once... you only went once,
then came home moping
and threw the money at me.
Get out of my way.
I'm fucking sick of this shit!
And will you fix the fucking antenna!
When I was small
and my parents happened to fight,
Marione would leave,
slamming the door
and mom would wait up all night
for him to come home.
I always wanted to tell her:
"Go to sleep, he'll be back".
I promised myself I'd never do that,
but for better or worse
even if these things are wrong,
I found myself doing
the same things they did.
But that night
Stefano didn't come home.
Bronte?
- Hi.
- Hi, Stefano.
I'm having a cash flow
problem right now.
Remember those chairs
I told you about?
Not again, I said no.
I'll sell them to you for what I paid.
- I paid 1,000, look...
- It's still too much for me.
Pay me now and I'll halve the price.
- That's not worth it for you.
- I know.
But I have no choice.
I'm really in bad shape.
In that case, bring me the chairs.
Thanks.
INSUFFICIENT FUNDS
Damn it!
- You okay?
- Yes.
It's just nothing seems
to be working today.
Gotta go
before the greengrocer closes.
Fuck...
- Have you seen Stefano by chance?
- Stefano?
No, have you checked at the cafe?
- He's not there.
- You okay? What's wrong?
Everything's fine. Bye.
- Hi, Luciana.
- Hi, Pino.
How are you and the belly doing?
- Worn out but almost there...
- Good.
I don't want to stress you out
in a time like this
but your husband's
been giving me the runaround.
- That's not right.
- No, I'm really sorry.
He's just been crazy busy
with a work thing so...
There's always an excuse.
6 months behind on rent,
it's not peanuts.
- Can you give us another month...
- I've been doing that forever.
Luciana, I won't evict you
because I'm a good man
but I'm not a charity worker,
you know.
Ever heard of road rules?!
- He's at fault for rear-ending me!
- We'll verify it.
What's there to verify?
I pay your fucking salary!
Don't touch me!
- Zanzotto, will you come help me?
- Antonio!
Are you in a daze?
I was looking at you from inside...
I was just looking.
Coming to the town festival?
We're organizing it.
Yes. I'll go home and freshen up
since I rushed out to run errands.
I'm going home too,
to get my hair done.
Why don't you come?
You can tidy up.
No, thanks,
I left my wallet at home...
She's looking for new clients,
the first time is free.
- Dunno...
- Know her?
Manuela... that sweet lady...
Lady... man...
the super tall trannie!
Know her?
Come on.
- What a dumbass!
- Guys, it's no big deal.
You should've given me a hand
instead of standing there,
you asshole!
- But I didn't understand...
- What?
He attacked me,
what's there to understand?
You lucked out.
He's no partner, he's a dummy.
- You're going overboard.
- Let's tone it down.
You should be ashamed!
- Ashamed of what?
- Of what?
You got your partner killed!
Hey, I didn't get anyone killed,
is that clear?
You should be ashamed!
Were you there? No!
Did you know Giovanni?
He was like a son to me!
I raised Giovanni!
I told him:
"Let me go after him",
but he came along anyway.
When he turned around,
I saw he was 15 at most,
and I don't shoot kids!
So you let him shoot your partner?
Shithead!
Two seconds to decide.
- Can you decide in 2 seconds?
- If they're shooting my partner, yes.
You're paid to make decisions
in 2 seconds, asshole.
- Roccotelli!
- Come on, Stefano!
Roccotelli!
- I'm glad you like my work.
- Thanks.
- Tell your friends.
- Will do.
Sorry but I have to go.
Can leave my case here till tomorrow?
- Sure.
- Bye.
Thanks.
I'd better go too,
or I'll get stuck in the parade.
- Where'd I put my jacket?
- I don't know.
Here it is.
I don't think I'll go,
I don't feel like it anymore.
I might just stay home
and watch a movie
instead of having people
stare at my ass...
You know...
Finardi, can I have a word?
Hi, how are you?
You never let me know about the job.
We're at the festival now,
let's talk tomorrow.
And you never take my calls...
Excuse me.
I've got no say at Greenlife anymore,
they're going bust.
Right now the CEO and Saltutti
are having a meeting and may fire me.
I was counting on you,
you promised.
I know, but I can't solve
everyone's problems.
You can't just count on others,
learn to be fucking self-sufficient.
- Hold on.
- No, I have to go.
- Want to make me feel guilty?
- You're too tense now.
And I can't get upset
or my baby will start kicking.
I'm tense because that place
makes you become evil.
For 10 years I had to interact
with awful people,
smile at those monsters,
be tainted by their stench.
Well, I happen to miss
those awful monsters,
because I have no choice.
I was tainted by their stench too,
but since it was my bread and butter,
I didn't care.
The stench is much worse
when you have no job.
I feel like shit.
Mom was wrong, Mario.
Mom put up with things for 38 years,
but not you, don't be a sheep
or the wolves will eat you.
Don't give in, Mario!
Always ask why and how come.
Breathe down their necks,
don't let them get the upper hand.
And if they slap you, slap back!
React, Mario... react, my love.
Hey, what are you doing here?
I'm going to work at the club.
- Dressed like that?
- Yeah...
go-go dancers can't wear sweats.
You're a go-go dancer?
No, hold on.
Would you please stop?
Get lost, what the hell
do you want from me?
Come with me and let's talk it over.
I'm not going anywhere with you.
I was ashamed,
this situation isn't easy for me.
Antonio, get lost!
I want to apologize.
But I'm not ready
to have a "different" friend.
Different? Really?!
What's so different about me?
We'll get nowhere if
you attack my every word.
I meant different as in unconventional.
- Do you understand?
- Listen, honey...
I eat with my mouth like you.
The only thing different about me
is if I want to be a nurse,
they won't allow me to.
If I want to open a bank account,
they call the cops.
If I want to go to the town festival,
I have to endure people mocking me
all night long.
If I were a whore,
then nobody would be shocked.
Can I buy you a beer, Manuela?
Vale.
What are you doing here now?
I need to see Saltutti,
I know he's in a meeting.
Don't cause trouble,
you know you can't.
And why can't I?
They fired me, I have the right
to talk to him.
I know, but...
- Let them work.
- Why are you defending them?
Please, Luciana, leave.
I get it, sorry. Bye.
Bye, Luciana.
No, where are you going?
You'll get me in trouble!
Where are you going with that belly?
Luciana, don't get me in trouble.
Don't cause trouble, Luciana!
For chrissake!
- Saltutti, we have to fire people.
- I know that...
Excuse me.
- What's going on?
- I just want to talk to Saltutti.
Mrs. Colacci, now's not the time.
If you let me in,
I'll just be a minute.
What's all this ruckus?
You see, some time ago
I'd spoken to Mr. Finardi
who said I'd be given my job back...
Since I'm due any day now,
I could come back to work next month.
Mrs. Colacci, you should just focus
on your baby now.
Now catch your breath,
drink some water,
and I'll have you driven home.
All right.
But will you please rehire me?
I need this job.
I'm sorry for disturbing you,
but I beg you to help me.
No need to beg.
But you need to go home now, okay?
Okay...
So you'll rehire me?
You don't seem to understand.
You can't come here begging for work
while we're having a meeting
to safeguard our employees.
Plus, you're pregnant!
You shouldn't do these things now.
Everything will sort itself out,
but let's not lose our dignity,
it's essential.
What's wrong?
- Bruno, help her.
- Come with me.
Make sure she sees a doctor.
- What is it?
- Contractions.
Breathe deeply.
- Are you sure you feel better?
- Yes, I'm fine now.
- Can I call someone?
- I'm fine.
Okay.
Some fresh air will do you good.
- Yes.
- Bye, Luciana.
Everything will sort itself out,
you'll see.
Everything will sort itself out.
Hey!
- Don't, it's loaded.
- Let me in.
- Luciana, calm down.
- No!
I won't calm down,
I'm fucking fed up!
- No, Luciana.
- Move!
Move!
Luciana,
what are you doing with that gun?
Don't move!
Of all times to wake up...
- Drop the gun.
- No, drop yours.
Did you hear Luciana?
Lower your gun.
- Why?
- Why doesn't matter...
We both have kids.
You lower it too, Luciana!
I'm in the middle.
- Don't move!
- You don't move.
Damn you, lower that gun!
We both know you'd never shoot.
Did you hear that?
That was a gunshot.
Let me go back and see.
Know what?
Dignity is a word
you shouldn't even pronounce.
I came here before
to talk to you politely,
and you treated me like a poor sucker.
- I was trying...
- Like a piece of garbage.
You think I'd be here
if I weren't really in need?
- I understand but...
- I want my life back.
I want my measly salary back!
I want to work here
for the rest of my life!
I want to be rewarded
for bringing a child into this world,
that's all I ask!
Give me my job back!
Antonio...
Be careful!
Holy shit...
I'm going in.
You stay here, don't move.
Take this.
No, I don't want anyone to get hurt,
we don't need it.
Bruno?
Be careful.
It was a shitty life, truth be told,
but that's what we got dealt
and we were fine with it.
Now I want my life back.
Of course, yes...
Luciana...
Leave, this doesn't involve you.
Relax, lower the gun.
- Yes, lower the gun.
- Shut up!
- Oh God!
- Call an ambulance.
- Call an ambulance.
- Yes, I will.
Look at me, look at me...
Lower that gun.
No, I won't!
Then point it at me.
Look at me, point it at me.
- What do you want?
- Calm down, Luciana.
It's not worth it... not for them.
Be reasonable.
They don't want
to be reasonable with me.
Get rid of the gun anyway.
I don't have one, see?
Just talk to me...
think about your baby,
he'll suffer the consequences.
Don't be crazy.
I'm not crazy...
I'm tired.
I'm tired.
Good.
Police!
Drop the gun.
- No!
- Step aside.
No and don't move or I'll open fire!
No! Stay calm, Christ,
or someone will get hurt!
Officer, arrest that nutcase!
Shut up, asshole!
Just ignore him,
she's not crazy, she's just confused.
I'm not confused, rehire me
or I won't drop the gun.
Luciana.
It's just me and you...
Look at me, Bruno.
It's just me and you...
- Luciana!
- I said to stay in the car!
Ma'am, drop the gun
or I'll be forced to shoot.
- No shooting!
- Move aside.
Bruno...
what should I do?
Luciana, do what the cop says.
Luciana, do what Antonio says.
He won't hurt you.
She's in pain,
call an ambulance, please!
I won't call an ambulance
unless she drops the gun.
Ma'am, I'm telling you
to lower the gun!
Luciana...
Sweetheart!
You'll be fine, my love...
Someone's been wounded.
By a shot, a gun,
by a gunshot!
Ma'am, push.
Come on!
Come on, honey...
Mario...
We have to call him Mario,
like my dad.
Okay, baby.
Mario!
Mario!
Coming!
Where were you?
- Playing ball.
- Always playing ball...
Give me the 16.
I said 16...
- I messed up?
- Yep.
No problem, I'll handle it.
Clean it up with that rag.
Let's get to work now.
My Mario weighed 3 kg at birth,
and he didn't shed a single tear.
His eyes were open and he looked
at everyone as if he knew them.
He had a proud, bold look
on his face,
like a small, quiet warrior.
Everyone in town calls him
"Luciana's son".
When I tell him how he was born
he looks wide-eyed at me and says:
"Tell me again, mom!"
Maybe it's wrong to, but
at least I'm telling him the truth.
Our Lord said that
the last shall be the first
but he didn't exactly say...
when.