The Departure (1967) - full transcript

A fast-paced comedy about a young Belgian car nut and hairdresser's apprentice, his girlfriend, and their legal and illegal attempts to get a Porsche under him for his nearing debut race.

- He's leaving for the weekend
- What?

It's not a tragedy, we'll
find a different solution.

Shit!

There's another solution... Maharajah!

His excellence asks if this is

the best reseller in Bruxelles

Yes, your excellence.

His excellence desires to buy
a black car that's extremely fast

Here it is, a black car

His Excellence can well
see that the car is black

but is it also extremely fast?



His Excellence would prefer
that I'm the one who drives.

Sure!

His Excellence is visiting
the Ambassador.

Later he thinks
he'll show him the vehicle.

It would be better if it's you who
shows it to His Excellence and the Ambassador

I'm not the driver.

You've driven it with such
ability despite it being your first time.

I'm just his secretary

We wouldn't do any better,
believe me. Here is my card.

We are open until 6. A telephone
call will suffice.

Hurry up. The porter asked
too many questions.

Rascal!

You're happy, aren't you?

You owed me 200 for the
Mercedes, plus this 500, it makes 700.



Help yourself.
Let's close our business.

Is it a deal?

It's a gift! Take what you want!

The only thing left
is this lousy wallet.

Take it as a gift.

- What for?
- It's for your collection.

I'm not convinced...

No... it's just that your job is over.

- Do you have a big deal?
- No, I'm done, nothing more.

Will you drive the 2CV back?

Can't you do it by yourself?

No, this morning I’ve
too many appointments.

Hurry up!

With this one and that one.

- Come on, get lost.
- Cool down.

The gasoline!

Thanks madam. Sorry for
being late but I punctured a tyre.

Wait a moment.

- Here it is
- Thanks madam.

Take the lift, or else Oscar
keeps on going upstairs

Come here, Oscar

Take your bone!

Come, so your mum puts
you on the little coat.

- Please, Mrs. Van de Put?
- What?

Michelle has just come out.

Mrs. please...

"Miss" please.

Sorry for being late.

You are not late at all.

Sorry but I punctured a
tyre that's why I’m late.

You are very kind.

This box is not for me

I'll go and see if Mrs.
Van de Put is still home

If you're frightened by
Oscar I'll put a muzzle on him.

- She is deaf and he's toothless.
- Where shall I put this?

Well done, do a good deed.

I don't know if it's Oscar that's too
small or his little coat that's too big

but in any case it hurts.

Give it to Mrs. van de Put

Do you think he has rabies?

No I don't think so unless
Mrs. Van de Put has bitten him.

Does it burn?

Doesn't it burn?

Ah! Perfect! I have to go.

- Do you want to taste a delicious sausage?
- Here it is, to pay for your delicious sausage.

It is for the engine.

It's the car who pays.

This sausage is very
good, we'll come back.

I often pass this way in the morning.

Are you Paul Frére?

May I ask you a question?

How did you get your
first car for your first rally?

I don't remember any
more. I did it somehow.

Did you apply without a car?

Yes, this one is not mine
and I haven't money to rent one.

I can't wait to drive in this rally.

You caught me a little unaware.

Don't you have a friend whom
you can ask for money?

Give me some advice.

No no, I haven't any and I must absolutely
take part in this rally

I put in it all my... I
don't know how to explain.

The hard part is to achieve results

to be successful, to compete
at a high level

to be a name.

Can't you help me at all?

Don't you know what I could do? The
rally begins the day after tomorrow.

No but I hope you manage it.

Good luck!

Are you crazy? Let me go.

- Let me go. what's got into you?
- Your friend told me everything!

You are a bastard!

Let me go!

Don't touch the number plate!

You want the number
plate? Go and get it!

I don't care about the plate!

I could go in jail!

Now return the car soon.

- Go away!
- Yes, I will go away!

Bastard!

See you in a quarter of hour,
at the Porsche. I'll arrive first.

Has the selection already be done?

Yes, the list of who is participating
is over there.

Number 9.

Sorry, I have applied with a
Porsche and I’d like to know...

Over there...

Are you Paul Deriviere?

I have applied with a
Porsche, I’ve number 9

I'd like to know if it’s possible
to change vehicle.

You have to maintain
the same category.

Look, it's badly parked,
and its brakes don't work.

May I start in a Mustang or a Jaguar?

- With one of these two?
- Yes, I wanted to know, just in case...

If it's just in case,
have your brakes repaired.

You are the cause of the
crash, then you blame the others!

- That's not true!
- I saw you!

He overtook me then cut me up!

[in Italian] Imbecile!
He saw that too.

He saw that too.

[In Italian] If you hit me
I'll break your face. You Know?

Officer!

He is a road hog!

He drives around with that old crock!

He cut me up!

It was you!

Come and see.

Give me the paper turban, idiot.

Get off!

I've return you that old crock.
Its brakes are filthy.

But it's an exceptional car.

Do you want a nut?

Goodbye. Don't you
want to see me again?

Bye.

Mister. You lost your number nine.

For heaven's sake! How
long should I wait?

Actually, it's the
same wherever you go.

Just think! The other hair-dresser
has burnt me!

Has burnt your hair? That's a shame!

By the way, some days ago
a hospice caught fire.

- 20 people died.
- More than 80!

Did you read it in the newspaper?

If you read it in a newspaper...

It said that someone was naked.

And I read that someone caught a cold.

For sure. They were
all wearing pyjamas.

They were sleeping. Someone was naked.

- Imbecile!
- Please?

Nothing, madam.

I'll wait for you to
continue our little talk.

What do you think about,
washing my hair?

I think of my mum.

And are you always thinking of her?

I'm not here for thinking.

When you think
something what do you think?

Let it remain between you and
I... I'm always thinking about cars.

That's better!

You have already
come here with a Porsche.

And so what?

Nothing!

I just wanted to know
if you still have it.

If it absolutely has to be a Porsche

there are three solutions.

Buy one, rent one...

things that seem to be ruled out

or being kind

to someone who owns one.

How much does it cost to rent one?

You'd better telephone
someone who owns a Porsche.

This way, Madam. Have a seat

When you get a tip
at least say thanks.

It wasn't a tip, it was
the address of a clairvoyant

I'm calling for the
renting of a Porsche.

No, it's just for a few days.

How much is the rental? What?

But that's not possible!

Is it the same for just one day?

That's impossible!

Tomorrow I'll steal something at
the car showroom to make some money.

Are you crazy? Go there at
night-time with a girl.

Give me a sausage.

- Will you give me a sausage?
- They are sold.

Ah, that's why this
morning I made a fool of you.

But you are a fool!

Nobody has forced you.

I gave you 20 Francs to put
a sausage in the car's exhaust.

Come on, give me a sausage!

You want a sausage?

Then, inflate the tyres.

I have money to buy a sausage.

Those people gave me money

to buy your sausages.

I've come here as you asked.

This is my private mode of transport,
it's quite responsive.

It's much faster than a
Porsche...in the traffic

Come here!

It's faster.

Ah, I get it! You prefer the old
ones. Those with a big belly.

Come on, get in!

We are closing!

It's beautiful, isn't it?

Did you get the catalogue?

There is one in the boot.

Here it is!

We are closing, exit please!

And so?

And so what?

What will we do now?

Nothing!

"Miss, I invite you to pass the
evening in the boot of a car"

If you had told me so I
would have thought you were crazy.

Miss, I invite you to pass
the evening in the boot of a car.

Do you still think I'm crazy?

What were you
talking about on your moped?

Nothing...

Just things...

Which things?

- Didn't you really hear anything?
- No, nothing!

So why did you get off?

Because you played your cards right.

You are an asshole!

You 're horrible.

Because a man who wants
to bed you who has a Porsche

is worth more than a man with a moped.

He is beautiful, the man on the moped!

I'm hungry.

Then why did you come here with me?

Is that all you have to tell me?

Why? Isn't that enough?

Yes, that's true, you're right.

It already happened that a man
wants to bed me in his car

or on foot...

I am the first on a moped!

I love you.

Isn't it good? It's a
perfect alibi if they catch me!

- A romantic love!
- It's perfect.

Are you here to flatten the tyres

To commit arson? Steal a Rolls?

No, to steal some spare parts,
I need 15000 francs.

- Can't you just steal?
- I’m not a thief.

And I'm not an alibi.

Don't touch me!

Let me get out or I'll slap you!

Try it!

Stop it.

Stop it!

I'm hungry.

I didn't come here to steal!

I have no money for a hotel and
my mum doesn't want me home.

There's a girl in the trunk

Are you scared?

I will begin to work.

No, wait. I'll find the 15000 francs

How are you going to?

- Let's go.
- Let's wait for the morning.

Once more.

Come on, once more, but stronger!

I can't punch you!

Yes, just do it!

- Do it!
- Leave me!

Hit me!

Hit me!

Give me a punch!

- Do you really want it?
- Yes!

- You asked for it!
- Hit me!

Go and find him!

Look for the boss!

Wet it.

Stay seated, if it doesn't get
better I’ll call a doctor.

I have something more to sell
and I will get some big notes.

Who and how much?

It doesn't matter!

You take 3000, we leave and win.

Why are you still
thinking? This time it's done.

Yesterday was the same, but the
money of the maharajah are gone.

You are a fool, you'll come to
a bad end because of this rally.

Even if you had that damned car
I wouldn’t leave with you.

Cut it out, idiot

The pilot sends you to hell.

I'd give to you the 15000
francs but I wouldn't leave with you.

You are crazy, go alone.

It's better a live hairdresser
than a dead driver.

I want to be good with
you, I'll give you my lighter

and my pencil case...

and also my watch too.

Sell them all, start
and break your bones.

The note-book.

You're getting better.

Go back to work, change your overalls.

Mark, you're a jerk.

Take it, here it is, your note-book

the moped is valued at 1000
francs, the dresses are at best 1000.

You are completely crazy.

Here, take this one
too, it is worth 10000.

but next Monday you'll have
the boss hot on your heels.

If you might wait just a moment,
I'll lend you a coat

Please have a seat,
I'll be with you in a moment.

Hello, I'd like to talk with Michelle

No, I'd like to talk with Michelle

No, nothing!

We should carry the wigs to
Mrs. Van de Put immediately.

No, it's nothing!

Telephone here and ask to have
the wigs carried immediately.

Yes, soon. Got it?

- What are you doing?
- Excuse me madam.

It is necessary to carry this
wig to Mrs. Van de Put.

Sorry madam...

- Marc is feeling better and I...
- Is it you now who's sick?

Go when you've finished and
come back in half an hour at most.

Hey sir, can you please hold my moped?

- Are you nuts?
- Shut up!

Old witch

- Well, how much for this original?
- It's a good copy.

No, look, this is original!

it's you who's "original".

Excuse me, will you help
me to get this mirror in?

- How much? It's original.
- Help the lady, the price won't change.

For the used dress?

...200 francs.

For the used shoes, 100 francs.

For the globe, 100 francs.

For the copy...

...300 francs and
it makes 900 for all.

- But it's original!
- It makes 900 for all!

How much for the mirror?

I'll give you my watch too.

- 300 francs.
- For the watch?

- But it's a real watch!
- 300.

How much for the mirror?

350!

300.

How much for the mirror?

- Be indifferent, like with poker.
- What's your opinion?

Who cares?

I'm an old man, consumed by
work I'm too good at heart.

Besides, it's not my mirror.

- I have a fantastic moped!
- So go and take a ride.

You, instead, you have
grown up in front of the mirror...

...first, standing up on your tiptoes
to see that nice little face

later, to learn
how to tie your ribbon.

And is it up to me? Is it
up to me to say the price?

Here it is. This is the moped.

I'm not finished yet with this lady.

I wouldn’t do this
price even for my daughter.

Including the projector?

- What are you waiting for?
- I'm waiting for you two to finish so I can leave with her.

I can't take care of you alone.

I have no time to lose.

What, 1000 francs? For the mirror?

The mirror is worth 300
and the moped 2000.

... if you don't like it...

It didn't go amiss.

Well. And now let's go for the plait.

Hello. Good morning madam, it's me.

Yes, you gave your telephone number.

I have a wonderful red
wig. Do you want it?

What?

She'll come back home tonight...

Not earlier? Ok.

I'm sorry. Bye.

You rascal, I'll break your face!

Out!

- Are you angry with me?
- Because... It's not your business!

But why me?

Calm down and wait for me at the bar.

we'll have a drink and fix it all.

Well... give me a coke.

Better yet, give me a Porto.

No, give me an aperitif.

No, give me a cocktail.

Which one, mister?

A cocktail.

For a young lady!

"Tenerissimo".

How much do I owe you?

Is it ok?

How did you guess?

I know lots of little things.

"Tenerissimo"!

And for example... what now?

One more?

You are not such a fool.
Even if you go around with a wig.

It's just a pretext.

You're not such a fool.

One more.

The first one has been paid, madam.

What can I offer you? Ice cream?

Cakes? Cinema?

Forget the wig, take it,
here's the notebook.

- What is it?
- Learn it by heart and you'll become a racing driver.

- Where do you go?
- Don't you care, wait here and I'll come back with money.

- Do you know where the brake pedal is?
- I also know where the accelerator is.

Then you drive.

Not bad.

With a Porsche it would be better.

Because with a Porsche it...

Do you hope I will add a Porsche
behind your number plates?

I didn't ask you for anything.

Was it by chance that
we met at the fashion show?

Or was it by chance that
you had the wig with you?

You know with chance, sometimes
it's lucky, others not.

This time it wasn't unlucky.

This was your plan!

You smile and when
she asks you what you want

you answer: "I requested a Porsche.

but I just have the number plates".

Please may I ask you to
take me back to the fashion show,

because down there... there is a...

a friend with a car.

How much do you need?

You know... this
doesn't matter anymore!

And it has to be a Porsche
1600 or a 912?

No, it's a 911 S.

Let's do this, you come to my
place and we'll talk about it quietly

Try to understand, first
of all, I must win the rally!

Can we go now?

It's too late now, the shop is closed.

Yes, I know, but the deposit
is my guarantee!

This is some money, plus these
wigs are worth plenty.

- Sorry, what is it all about?
- They are worth 10000 francs!

I'm not denying it.

I want to rent a Porsche, here
is the money and the hair.

Is it your little sister's
or your girlfriend's money?

They are valued 10000 francs,
call any air-dresser he will tell you.

As far as the money's concerned,
there it is, cash.

I'm sorry sir, to rent a car one
needs to be at least 23 years old.

I have a drivers
license. There's no other way?

Nothing to do?

Be careful not to
lose your 10000 francs...

Then, won't you ask me how it went?

We could go to the cinema.

No!

- I'll steal a car!
- Are you crazy?

It's the only solution.

That imbecile closed it.

We'll find an unlocked Porsche.

I'm tired!

Fill her up.

Hey, the money!

Give me the money.

Wait for me!

- It's over!
- Why?

Because a dog is a dog
and a car is a car.

I'm calling the gas station.

Do you want me to talk?

You know what to say?

My brother has borrowed a car

Yes, next to you, he found
it, there's a dog inside.

He just played a stupid trick.

It's not a big crime.

You can inform the owner.

Have a seat, madam. Please.

This is a comb.

I have to use it with my right hand.

I have to use it
with extreme gentleness.

It has to be lustrous,
very lustrous...

... too lustrous.

I have to bear

every change in your mood.

I dress in white.

to signify that I'm clean enough

to get next to you.

It's my stage costume

and I know my role very well.

- My boss!
- Is he coming upstairs?

I don't know...

- Take this!
- Why?

Take it!

- Get in.
- Why?

Get in!

- What did you write?
- And what do you care?

You could be kind. I'm
doing you a favour.

I wrote to my boss
that I borrowed his Porsche

to participate in tomorrow's
rally with it.

I didn't understand anything
of what's written in the notebook.

Wear your
crash-helmet! Listen to me, wear it!

Great, we have still some time left.

- We're only 100m from the hotel.
- We can't spend money.

- If we don't sleep, we are done.
- It's you who needs to sleep, go.

Pass, pass...

Shut up, the old women is listening.

You're a good driver.

- And you? - A
good co-driver?

I don't know.

Tomorrow we'll see.

You should be faster in signalling me.

You are very good at saying
"attention", "bend",

but you pause too much
when reading the speed

but some bends can be...

- Don't think about it.
- It's very important.

What's more... more important?

It's the bathroom.

I have nothing to get shaved.

Did you see how I counter-steer?

The main thing is to
keep owns arms extended

It's by the
principle of centrifugal force

Don't play the fool, come here.

Do you want... do you want a nut?

Here it is!

Turn off the light.

You are all wet!

In this filthy hotel there aren't
towels and water is frozen.

Take the suitcase.

Take your sweater off.

Turn round.

So you can have the chance
to see me naked.

It was a beautiful day in autumn.

My first dog, me and my
mum bred him by baby's bottle.

Is he still alive?

Oh no! It's clear you
haven't ever had a dog.

He died a long time ago.

That is my first professional
photo, I used to be a model.

- Of course I'm the one on the left.
- Are you still a model?

No, now it's over.

I forced myself to dance.

it was half dance and half gym.

That is my first cover.

And your first bike.

No! We have painted the background.

They told me I wear the hats well.

This is a make up test.

You'd have been happy!

That is my first appearance
in front of a television camera.

The first and the last, for TV.

There I was interviewed to know
what I thought about a soap

- Which soap?
- Just a soap...

There I was becoming
conscious of the end of my career.

I was sad because for me it was fun,

it was something extraordinary.

There... there I'm...

- Nothing...
- Who's he?

Just... a guy.

- And what are you doing with him there?
- Nothing, it's just a picture, he was a model.

And that?

Are you sleeping?

You asleep? Answer me.

What's happening?

- Nothing.
- Didn't you wake up?

Get up.

Get up!

Subtitles: MENiSCUS