The Christmas Clause (2008) - full transcript
A stressed out lawyer and mother of three gets her yuletide wish when she wishes to see what her life would be like if she had chosen to pursue her career in Law rather than marrying and becoming a working mother.
[Christmas music]
- [Mom Narrator] Ah Christmas.
Everyone's favorite time of the
year.
Those magical days in December
when anything seems possible.
[alarm ringing]
Except if you happen to be me.
- Give me back my brush.
- It's mine!
- No It's my brush, my brush.
- Guys, guys please, please can
we stop?
[children arguing loudly]
Just give her the brush Anna,
please.
Sophie have you seen my glasses?
- Give it back!
- Guys I said no shouting.
- It's mine, give me back my
brush.
- Okay, you're not listening.
Go, kitchen.
[child shrieks]
- [Older Child] Give it back.
- [Younger Child] It's mine.
- It's over there.
- Thank you.
Pancakes in five minutes.
- Quiet!
These last few years,
Christmas seems like another
sugar coated to do on
my already bloated list.
Women everywhere are expected
to conjure their inner Marthas
and do it all.
Mommies / supermodels.
Gourmet chefs.
Of course there's the
decorating.
[baby crying]
Doesn't it just make you want
to sing?
[baby crying]
[Mom moaning]
[Mom sighing]
Whoopsie, there we go.
Oh Annie honey, please.
Put on your socks.
- Toes hurt, toes hurt.
- Yeah well nothing is
worse than cold feet.
[puke splattering]
[baby burping]
Except for barf on the Lasky
brief and a 10 year old hooker.
Okay sweet cheeks wash it off.
Is that my heirloom
engagement ring, Nikki?
Give it to me.
- But it's for school.
- Go, wash, now.
- I hate you.
- Santa heard that.
[groaning]
Oh are those yesterday's
clothes?
Please tell me you weren't
up all night working.
- Okay I won't but I was.
You have got to see my new
design for the Community Center.
It's, Soph I really think
we've got a shot at this one.
- Hallelujah.
- [Dad] Oh thanks.
- It's just that honey, I
think that Nikki needs braces
and my transmission's shot.
You know it would be really
great if you got this job.
[sniffing]
- I know that starting my
own firm has always seemed
kind of speculative to you,
but look I'm a good architect.
I'm good at my job.
I'm going to get work.
- Yeah you have one job, I have
10.
- Excuse me?
- I can't be late.
Go on get your stuff.
Alright you guys I cannot be
late.
Nikki, Anna, come on hurry up.
- Okay listen, you go.
I will take JJ to daycare.
- No, no, no I have him, I have
him.
[sighing]
- Soph listen, let me do it.
- No, no, no, I have
everything under control David.
I'm fine.
Girls, now, let's go, go, go!
Oh gosh.
- Come on sweetie.
Love you guys.
[horn beeping]
[kids arguing and singing]
- Okay.
Anna just stop for a
second please, thank you.
- Can we see Santa after school?
- We're busy later right Mom?
- Oh yeah I'm busy.
After lunch I have a staff
meeting.
I have the contracts at two.
I have a deposition at four
and I sure hope that Bob
doesn't expect me
to work late tonight again.
- That's all, that's all
you have on your schedule?
- Mom I wanna see Santa.
- Okay girls, we're almost
at the front of the line.
Get ready.
- Why does no one ever listen
to me?
- I can sing for him.
Jingle bell jingle
bell jingle all the way
- Please Anna anything but that
song.
Anything, I can't bear to hear
it again.
Okay.
- I decided I want a puppy from
Santa.
Do you think he'll get me a
puppy?
- Mom, hello?
- Nikki, my first born apple
of my eye, gem of my life.
What is with you today?
Alright, girls, we're here.
Get it together.
Alright girls, come on.
Let's go, go go go.
Good you've got your backpack.
Good go.
Goodbye honey I love you.
I love you, bye.
Bye girls.
[ominous music]
- Sophie Kelly are you avoiding
me?
- Hey neighbor, no of course
not.
- Did you bring your
cookies for the bake sale?
- They're cooling on the rack.
- It's just awesome of you to
volunteer.
I don't know how you do
it, you Superwoman you.
- Yay.
[sighing]
[school bell ringing]
- So your Mom really forgot
about the Christmas play today?
- Yeah I even put my
makeup on to remind her.
- And what'd she say?
- She called me a hooker
and then made my Dad upset.
- Whoa.
What's a hooker?
[ominous music]
- They man's a donkey who
says it's my own fault
I signed a contract with no
benefits.
I hope this baby knows how to
file.
- You alright Claire?
- Do I look like a whale?
- No.
- Okay.
- You're beautiful.
Oh my gosh.
- Oh thank Hades.
Bob is choking on his All Bran.
Gosh did I miss the Lasky
meeting?
- They were early.
I swear that woman gets
up at five in the morning
just to sharpen her horns.
Here they come.
- Mark, rest assured this firm--
- Quick, duck!
- Will be at your back and call
24 / 7.
- That man is vile, vile!
- Okay look, I need you
to print me up a new copy
of this contract and send
some cookies to school
and rough them up a bit so they
look like they're home made.
You're an angel, thank you.
- You're my goddess.
Which is why it is with
deep regret that I have to
give you the latest.
- What do you mean you're
going to give the Lasky account
to Chuck?
My work on this file has been
spotless.
Figuratively speaking.
- So when I climbed Everest
last year I had the best guide
in Nepal.
Got caught on the peak, ice
storm, 40 below, lost my pick.
Sherpa saved my ass.
- That's a beautiful story
Bob, what's your point.
- You leave work early
several times a week.
- Yeah well things have
been a little hectic lately.
- Well there's a major
property deal for the firm.
I just don't know if you're
the right person to be
up on that mountain right now.
- Excuse me?
- Well ever since you came
back from your last kid,
and believe me motherhood
is the most important job
in the world.
I just think you may have lost
your edge.
- Lost my edge?
I'm edgy.
No edge.
- We're making that push for
the top.
You gotta be able to
depend on your whole team
to get you there.
- I'm here for you Bob.
Look at me.
Okay I might have a run in my
stockings
but I am here for you.
- Oh come on, when push comes
to shove
what's it going to be?
24 / 7 with the Laskys or
little Angela's got pneumonia.
- Her name is Annie and she
refuses to put on warm socks.
- Not all Mommies can
reach the peak Sophie.
- Or the corner office.
- Sophie, Sophie, Sophie.
Come on, time is money.
[knocking]
- Come in.
- Hey sis.
- Hi.
Do you ever call first?
- More spontaneous this way.
So did we ever decide what
we were going to get Mom yet?
- We were supposed to get
her something last week.
- Is this some sort of passive
aggressive
sibling order thing?
- No, no, no, I'll get
her something tonight.
I've got to go to the mall.
- No, tonight you're
putting on a pretty dress
and making nice with the
clients.
- My god the office party.
- Any single men for me?
- No.
- Just for that I'm going
to bring the mashed yams
with the little colored
marshmallows for Christmas
dinner.
- Oh I forgot I was going to
host that.
I volunteered.
- After she got drunk
drinking two shots of tequila
at Mom and Dad's anniversary
party.
- Not a good day.
- See ya.
- Bye honey.
[sighing]
[metal clanking]
- The chair, I know, I'm on it.
- [Announcer] Attention holiday
shoppers,
there's only four days
left 'til Christmas.
Be sure to stop by our
Santa's Village to get your
photo with Santa.
[upbeat Christmas music]
- [Sophie] Oh baby please.
- [Child] I'm going
first, I'm going first.
- [Sophie] It's going to be
great.
Everything's going to be fine.
Would you guys stop arguing,
please.
Santa's going to hear you.
Okay just stand quietly
you're almost there.
- [Child] No I'm the one going
first.
Mom said I could.
- Hey Dave?
Dave?
Pick up the phone.
My battery's dying Dave,
please pick up the phone.
I'm at the mall.
I'm trying to get a dress and
I need you to take care of--
[squealing]
The kids because I have
this office party tonight.
Pick up the phone.
Honey!
[growling]
- Sophie?
- Marcia Wade.
- Oh my gosh.
What's it been 15 years?
- You look the same if that's
possible.
- Well you look healthy.
Tell me this isn't yours.
- Yeah he looks just like Dave.
My other two are other there.
- Mom, Mom!
- Get your rat nest hairdo out
of my face!
- Mom!
- Kids, you ever think about
them?
- Well let's just say the men I
date,
we're not spending a lot of
time thinking about babies.
[laughing]
I can't believe you and
Dave are still together.
- Yeah.
- God we used to have
so much fun in school.
- [Sophie] I know.
- You know, we should
get together for a drink.
Catch up properly.
- Yeah, you still at Coltrane
and Brock?
- It's Wade, Coltrane and Brock.
I took the whole thing over.
[baby screaming and crying]
- Oh well.
- You'd better call.
Martinis.
- Not gonna happen.
Here's your binky.
Nikki, please.
[baby crying]
Oh that's good.
Honey, it's time to see Santa.
- He looks weird.
- Uh well, no honey, come on.
Over here.
Santa is your friend.
Don't you want to tell
Santa your special wish?
- Uh uh.
- No?
Do you mind?
- [Santa] Come on.
- He doesn't bite, okay honey?
See it's okay.
- [Santa] Smile.
[shutter clicking]
And what does Mommy want for
Christmas.
- Her life.
[melancholy music]
[twinkling music]
It's your turn now.
Come on.
- [Santa] You must be Anna, huh?
Come here.
So what do you want for
Christmas.
- A puppy.
- [Santa] A puppy?
What kind of puppy?
- [Anna] A little snowball
puppy.
- [Santa] Snowball puppy?
- [Anna] Like that.
- [Santa] Okay.
Thanks a lot kid, Merry
Christmas.
- [Anna] Merry Christmas.
- Okay um, I've got 10
minutes to drive home
and then three minutes to shower
and then try on this dress.
Oh my gosh I hope this dress
fits.
I really do.
Hey watch that, it's kinda hot
okay?
- You know Santa said
I could have a puppy.
- You know Santa sometimes
brings other things.
Come here.
Santa brings other things
that you might not have asked
for okay?
- Maybe I should have asked for
a Mom
who cares about my life.
- You know you promised
that if I bought you some hot
chocolate
you'd stop complaining
for five minutes, alright?
- How can I?
This is the worst day ever.
- Agreed.
Keys, keys, where are my keys?
Oh god of randomly missing
things don't do this to me now.
[keys jingling]
Honey give me the keys.
Anna, stop it.
Just give me the keys.
[keys jingling]
Anna, stop it.
Anna please.
- Mom this is so boring
can we please just go?
- I know, look, I would send
you to Venus
and leave you there if I could,
alright?
Anna what are you doing
with the hot chocolate?
Stop that!
[gasping]
My new dress!
Oh my gosh.
How could you do that?
How am I ever going to
get a dress that fits now.
[kids yelling]
[baby crying]
- You shut up!
[baby crying]
[twinkling music]
Shut up!
[thumping]
[groaning]
- Where am I?
What?
The furniture department?
Or am I being punked?
[TV actor speaking Spanish]
By Pablo Escobar's mother.
[voice speaking Spanish]
- Slut, Margareta!
[gasping]
Your lobster cobb is
almost ready Miss Sophie.
- I'm sorry did I scare you?
- Are you okay?
You don't look so good.
I told you, you're working too
hard.
I make you a nice herbal tea.
- This is definitely not my
life.
- Okay, martini.
- It's a dream, right?
It's a dream.
Woo it's a dream.
Of course.
An amazing gravity defying
dream.
[water gently splashing]
Maybe I died and went off
to real estate heaven.
[laughing]
Hello!
- [Santa] Well well it's you
again.
- Aren't you that Santa from
the mall?
- How do you like your present?
- Kidnapping and hair
extensions.
Very funny.
- Oh I gave you more than that
sweetheart.
I gave you a whole new life.
- You did this?
It isn't real.
I'm dreaming.
I'm sleeping.
This is a dream.
Obviously.
[gasping]
Aren't I?
- Nope.
- Get away from me.
- Listen lady, I'm just
trying to do my job here.
- And what kind of job is that?
Where are my kids?
Do you have my kids?
Where are my kids?
- Whoa whoa just relax.
Your kids are fine, such as
they are.
- Okay what is that supposed to
mean?
- I was sent here to help.
And myself incidentally.
I got into a bit of trouble on
my last job
trying to make business
associates disappear.
See the thing is I wound up
dead too.
Bad boy, I know, but then
this opportunity came up
to kind of make things right.
- Oh really and how is it
right that I'm standing here
half naked in the back yard of
a McMansion
I don't recognize with
a pool cleaning Santa
who claims he's dead.
- You see once a year,
the big guy outsources.
Hires a few schmucks to pick up
the slack,
make a few wishes come true.
So if I get this right,
I'll be enjoying my
dearly departed Ma's
meatballs by New Years.
- So you're dead and you need
me to help you get to heaven.
Could this be any more cliche.
- Look, from the minute
I saw you in the mall
I knew you was a desperate
woman.
And you needed your wish to
come true.
Come on, could this be any
more like what you dreamed of?
Perfect house, perfect life,
perfect uh...
- Look I don't have time for
perfect.
I have shopping to finish,
an office party not to enjoy,
Christmas dinner for 23 and a
husband
I still haven't finished
yelling at yet.
[laughing]
- It's good you haven't
lost your sense of humor.
You know I had this client in
Chicago,
he went absolutely postal
when I turned his Ma
into Joey Ramone.
[laughing]
- Okay I'm going home now.
[sighing]
[gasping]
Would you just stop that?
Okay I have to go home.
- They're not there Sophie.
- What do you mean they're not
there.
You can't just make an entire
person's life disappear
just like that.
- I can and I did.
- Well then bring them back.
It's time for dinner.
I need money for a taxi.
Do you have any?
Or is there a coach made
out of a pumpkin outside?
- No see that's the thing.
I'm still working the kinks
out of my return policy.
- What is that supposed to mean?
- That is for you to figure out.
Otherwise...
- Otherwise what?
- This one could be final sale.
- You mean I could be stuck
like this?
My entire family could be gone
forever?
- Afraid so.
- You can't do that.
- Sure I can, I'm Santa Clause.
- No, that's crazy.
Look...
[gasping]
[phone buttons beeping]
Please be there Dave.
Honey, please be there, please
be there, please be there.
- [Recorded Phone Voice]
The number you have reached
is no longer in service.
- No.
No!
[crying]
Not that can't be me.
Anna, Annie!
Dave!
Dave are you up here?
Annie!
Nikki!
Anybody?
My babies.
[gasping]
[keys jingling]
[melancholy music]
[knocking]
Dave!
[knocking]
Dave honey!
Nikki!
Anybody home?
It's me Mom!
[knocking]
It's me Mommy!
Mommy's home.
- If you're looking for the
O'Brians they're not home.
- Barbara I am so glad to see
you.
- Do I know you?
- Yes of course you know me.
I'm the flaky Mom from the PTA.
I forgot to return the
bicycle pump last Spring.
Barbara, I live next door to
you.
My daughter Nikki and your
daughter have been friends
since kindergarten, come on.
- I'm sorry I don't know a
Nikki either,
and as long as I can remember
the O'Brians live here.
All nine of them.
Do you need some help?
- No, I'll just be going now.
- Somebody's husband is in
trouble.
[water dripping]
[sighing]
- It's only temporary so
I might as well enjoy it.
[bubbles popping]
Wow!
[upbeat music]
Oh my gosh, I am so tired.
[laughing]
[moaning]
I feel fantastic.
I haven't had a full
night's sleep in years.
Good morning.
And good night.
[groaning]
[phone ringing]
Go away.
Hello?
- Hi Sophie, the Laskys are on
for 10.
- Morris?
You know me?
- Unfortunately.
Are you on your way.
- Alright I'll be there.
Soon.
[groaning]
Alright let's see what I have
to wear.
Look at this closet, it's all
in order.
[gasping]
Oh soft.
Wow.
These are all mine.
Whoever said a Kelly bag
doesn't make a woman feel
powerful was lying.
[ominous music]
[phone ringing]
Hi Claire.
- You know my name?
- Yeah.
- She's been pissy since you
refused
to give her maternity leave.
- You look great Morris.
- No, I will not work on
Christmas Day.
Did you get my message about
the client party on Thursday?
Oh and the travel agent called
about Aspen
and Bob is late again.
- Yeah well he is the boss.
- Yeah in his sad little
Italian loafer dreams
he has your job.
[gasping]
- Not all Mommies can reach the
peak.
But I can.
I have waited my entire career
for this.
- I get it.
Late night again last night
with your Tony Robbins
motivational tapes?
- Don't you have something to
do?
I'm kidding Morris, I'm kidding.
[weak laughter]
- I know.
- This is the life.
Bob?
Bob!
- Sorry I'm late my kid has the
flu.
- Oh my gosh really?
- No.
- A lawyer lying.
Bob, Bob, Bob.
Time is money.
- The Laskys are in the
conference room.
I think we've kept them
waiting long enough.
- Jake.
- Good morning.
- Margaret.
Okay Ms. Lasky, singing the
land transfer agreements.
Here you go.
- This land has been in the
Lasky family for generations.
Developed properly it could be
our legacy.
- Well I can assure you that
this is my
utmost priority right now
and that this is my...
And like I was saying I can
assure you--
- Do you find this amusing?
- Actually not and if you look
at this
you can tell that this is my
priority
and I'm on this job 24 / 7.
- Me too.
- Let's hope so.
- Alright well can you open
up and look on page one.
You're absolutely right
about those changes,
I will make them and I'm
sure you'll be very happy.
- I will see you later.
- Hypothetically speaking
does playing footsie
under the table in some
weird alternate universe
count as cheating on my husband
who quite possibly doesn't
even know we're married
and might actually not even
exist?
- Come again?
- What's going on with Jake
Lasky and me?
- You mean Jake Lasky the
most eligible bachelor
in the city?
- Yes.
- He's been after you for weeks.
- After me as in after me?
- Let's just say this land
transfer isn't the only deal
he's planning on sealing this
Christmas.
Way to score boss.
- Hey!
Hey you!
Weird Santa guy, hey!
[sighing]
[melancholy Christmas music]
I need therapy.
A little retail therapy.
[upbeat Christmas music]
- Sophie, we've got that Tory
Burch trench
you were asking about.
- Oh socks!
- I heard she's seeing Jake
Lasky.
What I wouldn't give for that
life.
Come on.
[sighing]
- Wow.
You come here twice a week?
[laughing]
That's fantastic.
Ah there goes 10 years of
stress.
[phone ringing]
Oh can you get that, I...
Thank you.
Hello?
- Where are you?
- I'm right where I belong.
[imitates buzzer buzzing]
- You're late for the
Christmas wish charity concert.
- No can do.
I have a date with a memory
foam mattress
after my nails dry.
- Sting is hosting.
- What?
Sting?
Oh my god Sting, I love
Sting, I love Sting.
What am I going to wear?
I can't go alone.
Do you want to come with me?
- No I have to meet my trainer.
What about Jake.
- Oh no I can't deal
with Mr. Freaky Footsie.
Not tonight.
What about Marcia Wade.
She said she wanted to go for a
drink.
- After you bankrupted her firm
last year?
- What?
Collateral damage after our
expansion.
It was magnificent.
- Oh I'm a slut and a tyrant.
Did you have any luck
with that list of Santas
from the Bay Ridge Mall?
- They referred me to
head office in Jersey.
- Oh, well keep trying.
- [Morris On The Phone] Yeah
I'm not even going to ask.
- Jill, it's me Sophie.
Your sister.
Do you like Sting?
Jill look at these shoes.
Aren't they crazy?
Look how high they are, it's
insane.
And this bag, it's got
this weird horn on it.
I bet it's really expensive.
I wanted to show you these.
Look, real diamonds.
- You're festive.
- Yeah I know well it's not
every night I get to go out
partying with my little
sis in a limo to see Sting,
come on.
- You have to admit it's a
little weird.
I mean all of a sudden
you're leaving messages
and insisting we go out.
- Yeah but we talk five
times a day, I mean come on.
Or maybe I think about
you five times a day.
Forgot to call?
- For a year?
- Oh god.
- I can understand that you
don't have enough time for me
but Mom and Dad?
- What?
What is wrong with Mom and Dad?
- Sophie, you missed their
50th anniversary party.
- Yeah well I probably
had some important--
- You don't need to make
excuses.
You know what Mom ad Dad are
like.
They're proud.
Your career took front seat
and they just learned to live
with it.
[melancholy music]
[crowd chattering]
- You know Jill, I'd really
like to apologize for all the
terrible things I've done,
but I really can't remember
what they are, so.
Look all I can say is I'm going
to make it up to you, okay?
Oh champagne, you want some?
No?
Come on honey let's have some
fun.
[gasping]
Look at this art.
Dave would love this.
- Dave?
Dave Kelly?
- Yeah.
- I haven't thought about him
in years.
Wonder what happened to him.
- Yeah I wonder too.
- Do you ever imagine what
your life would have been like
if you hadn't dumped him?
- Yeah lately a lot.
- He's just such a great guy.
- He is but sometimes--
- Are you kidding?
Me and my girlfriends we
were just so jealous of you.
- Really?
- Yes, he was just so arty and
into you.
Imagine it, you would have
had like the cutest kids,
big house, 2.5 kids.
- Medium house with three kids.
- Yeah right.
- What?
- I just can't picture you
as the mother of three.
The mother of anything.
- Jill I would make a very
disheveled but charming mother.
A very good one.
- You slay me.
- It's true.
- Sophie, remember you're a
lightweight.
- Not tonight.
- [Announcer] Ladies and
gentlemen please find your
seats.
Sting has arrived--
- Oh my gosh.
[crowd murmuring]
Oh my gosh that was such a
great event.
I wish that he would have sang
more than three or four songs.
It was four.
- You know I think I'm getting
a little bit tired, so.
- Tired?
What is it, it's nine o'clock.
- Club soda?
- Come on.
Three's dancing.
Woo hoo, come on girl.
- No no no no, Sophie, Sophie,
no no no.
[loud dance music]
[camera shutter clicking]
'Cause I don't want nobody
but you
[crowd cheering]
'Cause I don't want nobody
but you
[camera shutter clicking]
- Hello world!
- Get down Sophie we're
going to get arrested.
Sophie!
- Oh gosh who cares.
None of this is real anyway.
- Well I don't feel like
spending the night in jail.
- What happened to you?
What happened to my fun
loving little sister?
- Your fun living little
sister who has to wake up early
in the morning to buy a
Christmas present for Mom?
Don't worry I'll sign
your name on the card.
- Jilly, Jilly oh Jilly
Jilly Jilly flower.
- You're so weird.
You haven't called me that in
years.
It's almost like you're
back to your old self.
- I am my old self.
This is not my life.
It is not yours either.
- You're drunk.
- I love you.
- Well I was drinking
cran-sodas.
Here please.
[groaning]
- Look honey, Jill wait.
Can't we just spend the
holidays together.
We can do like we did when
we were kids when I would
let you eat all those
chocolate thingys, you know,
from the calendar.
And then we could make
some stockings and eat,
oh that Scotch salmon
from Nova Scotia is good.
- I have plans with friends
upstate.
- Bring them all along.
I've got a very big house
and trust me I've got cooking
for 20 down pat.
- Maybe we can do something
in the New Year, okay?
- Okay.
- Sleep well, thanks for
everything.
Drink lots of water and
Merry Christmas, okay?
- Merry Christmas.
[sighing]
[food sizzling]
[phone ringing]
[groaning]
I love pancakes.
Especially when they're burnt.
- Since when do you eat carbs?
- Is it always so quiet around
here?
- When you were dating
that guy from the city gym,
there was the sound of his
expensive electric shaver he
use.
[imitates buzzing shaver]
Though personally, I don't
think it's healthy for a man to
shave so much, you know, down
there.
[groaning]
Hey Sophie, where are you?
Hello?
Sophie?
Are you hiding?
Where did you go?
[melancholy Christmas music]
[kids chattering]
- Hi.
Hi oh, are your hands cold?
You should put your mittens on.
Wish I had some.
I'm sorry.
[sighing]
[melancholy music]
Anne? Nik?
[children chattering]
- Get your roasted chestnuts
here, hot roasted chestnuts.
Merry Christmas.
Get your roasted chestnuts
here, hot roasted chestnuts.
- You!
- Hey!
- You!
- Whoa with the violence again.
You know you would have
made a great wingman.
- You think this is funny?
What kind of Christmas present
is this?
- Hey, you're the one that
wished for the new life.
- What good is a new life when
the ghosts of your old life
keep coming back to haunt
you ever single day.
- You wanted the Manolos
sweetheart,
now you gotta walk the walk.
- Manolos gave me bunions in
the 90s
and now that I have kids
they don't even fit.
And speaking of my kids, where
are they?
Do they exist?
Will they ever exist?
And my husband?
Just please, just tell me what
to do to reverse this thing.
- Okay.
It's simple.
You just gotta figure out
what's really important.
- My family, my husband, shoes
that fit.
Isn't it obvious?
Oh please I would do
anything to just see them.
- Don't start crying geez.
[children chattering]
- Oh Nikki.
- [Kids] I love you Mommy.
I love you.
- Don't go, wait!
That's just mean!
I have no more time for riddles.
Just tell me what to do.
- I'm sorry.
It doesn't work that way.
You have gotta figure
this out on your own.
You gotta dig deep, you gotta
look for the soul of this.
When it comes you'll know.
You're gonna feel it, right
here.
- I screwed up, I know that.
Isn't that enough?
- Just start at the beginning,
the answer will come.
It starts with a D.
- Dave.
Okay the last time I was talking
to Dave I was mad at him.
Okay, so I need to find him
somewhere and apologize.
Okay.
- Oh and Soph, one more thing.
You've got 'til the close
Christmas Eve
to make any exchanges.
Get your roasted chestnuts
here, hot roasted chestnuts.
Low in sodium.
[light music]
- Hello?
Dave?
- You're early, I have--
Sophie?
- It's so good to see you.
- Did someone die.
- No, no, you look so great.
- What are you doing here.
- You know how hard it is to
find a good diner in the city?
There's one over there
and I thought I'd come by
and say hi.
Hi.
- Hi.
- Um could I come in?
- Um, yeah I guess so.
This way.
I'm just on my way out of town,
so.
- Wow this place is not
like I remembered it.
- Well when they turned
the building into condos
I decided to ramp it up a
little bit.
- You've designed buildings
all over the world.
I forgot how talented you are.
- Well my favorite is
this community center
I'm trying to get built
down by the water, but,
you know, no money, monster
hours.
- And kind too, I forgot that.
- Okay Sophie, why are you
really here?
- I thought that we
could catch up, you know.
Go over old times.
- Oh is this some kind of
closure thing
because honestly I'm good,
really.
- Oh wow, gee look at this.
Self-improvement.
From the Inside Out, you
working on that.
- Yeah it's a little holiday
break.
- At a health spa?
- Well I haven't had a vacation
in years,
or Christmas actually, so it's,
just call it my attempt at one.
- Oh god, we used to love
to go away before the kids.
- Kids?
- Ah, look what I'm going
to say is going to sound
a little weird.
- Go on.
- What if I told you that we
didn't break up in college
and that we did get
married and we have three
wonderful, amazing, slightly
ill-behaved children.
- Oh you know what I gotta go.
- No please let me explain.
See I was having this
really really horrible day
because Anna wouldn't wear her
socks,
and Nikki, she's going through
one of those weird phases
where she's talking
back and wearing makeup
and then JJ was throwing
up all over the place
and I found myself at the
mall and there was this
really, really weird Santa
and then I ran into Marcia Wade.
Do you remember Marcia Wade?
You know and she looks great
and I was yelling at you
on the phone and I'm really,
really sorry about that.
See this is me apologizing.
Anyone up there?
Come on.
Any time now, come on.
[fingers snapping]
- You know what I should call
someone.
Can I call someone for you?
- Look the point is I didn't
mean for my entire family
to disappear.
I just needed a good night's
sleep.
- Okay Sophie I gotta tell you,
you're freaking me out now.
- I know none of this makes
any sense to you or me
but maybe it will some day.
But the thing is in order
to reverse this thing
I need to find out what's
really important to me
and that begins with you.
It all starts with you, Dave.
You and me as a family.
Please.
- Why now, of all times why now.
- Dave from the bottom
of my heart I am so sorry
for not trying hard
enough and for making you
have your office in the laundry
room.
- Uh hey, honey can you believe
it?
Sophie was just in the
neighborhood and--
- Honey?
- Let me fill you in since I'm
guessing
Dave hasn't gotten around to it.
- Well I was just about to.
- Fill me in on what Dave?
- It's an interesting story.
- Yes a tragedy with a happy
ending.
After you put me out
of business last year,
you know bankrupting
my firm and putting me
and my 25 employees out of work,
I had a little time on my
hands so I ran a marathon,
took up crochet and reconnected
with a few old friends
from college, like Dave.
- Facebook.
- Anyway one thing led
to the next and well,
we're both still single.
- Your mother's heirloom
engagement ring, it's mine.
- It's going to be a
simple wedding really.
Just us, some relaxing
yoga and some massage.
- You're getting married?
- On Christmas Eve.
- You love her.
You forgot all about me.
How did this happen?
- Well I'm sorry Sophie but you
and I,
that was a long time ago.
- I'm going to go to work.
- Probably.
- What?
She just showed up.
- Oh come on Sophie, you're the
CEO
of one of the biggest law
firms in the whole city.
Just get it together,
just get it together.
[crying and sniffling]
Hi.
- Hello.
- You hate me don't you.
- Hate is a very strong word.
- Well I'm a terrible
boss, I'm a bad mother,
I'm an awful person.
Oh god I hate this mascara.
And those eyelash curlers, you
know,
guys could never use them.
I'm a 60 percenter in
a hundred percent world
and now I'm being punished.
- Do you want me to get Morris?
- I just have to try harder.
I have to start with you.
What can I do to make your life
better?
- Seriously?
- Yeah.
- Well the whole maternity
leave policy sucks.
I mean how am I seriously
expected to be back on the job
two weeks after I have this
baby?
I need to be able to be a good
lawyer
and be a decent parent.
- You know what, take as
much time as you need.
- Can I get that in writing?
- Yeah, yeah, Morris will draw
it up.
- Wow, thank you.
Really.
- Call it new appreciation
for the working Mom.
[sobbing]
[upbeat Christmas music]
- So how is it that the new
most popular girl in school
isn't even at her own soiree?
- Have you ever wished that
you had a different life?
[laughing]
- Yeah like only every day.
See, this is my happy work face.
- Alright alright, I officially
apologize for being a pain
to work with.
Okay?
- What about my last employee
review where you called me fat
and said that if I didn't lose
weight
it would be bad for the
company's image.
- You look great.
- I know.
- Yeah, you know my whole
career I've wondered
what it would be like
if I focused on the job
instead of my family
and here it is.
I've destroyed every important
relationship I've ever had.
For what?
80 pairs of shoes.
Time to put on my makeup.
Big empty house.
God.
- Well if there's anything I
can do.
- Can you keep a secret?
- What a fantastic story.
A wiseguy Santa, lingerie and a
fur coat.
- You don't think I'm crazy?
- Oh yeah, absolutely, but
your story gives me hope.
- Don't you see, if I don't
figure out
how to reverse this thing by
Christmas Eve
I'm in danger of losing my
family forever.
- Well for starters you
have to stop Marcia Wade
from marrying Dave.
- Yeah but how can I do that.
He thinks I'm crazy.
He doesn't even know who I am
any more.
- Well then he needs
to get to re-know you.
Remember what he loved about
you in the first place.
Listen you took Marcia Wade
down once, you can do it again.
- But that was business.
I don't want to take anybody
down.
Besides, we used to be friends.
- Santa said start at the
beginning.
Your family begins with the two
of you.
Besides it wouldn't look
very good if you just
let your husband run off
and marry somebody else.
- You're right, you're right.
I've gotta get to that spa.
- I'll book you a room.
- Do you think I could
really win him back?
- Sophie, you are ruthless,
cruel and have fantastic teeth.
I know you can.
[car horn beeping]
- Sylvia the car's early.
Bye!
[ominous music]
Jake, what?
- Would you mind explaining
to me why you've not
been returning my phone calls?
- Well you know Christmas, busy
busy busy.
- Odd response considering
I'm your biggest client
and we made plans to spend
the holiday together.
- We did?
[laughing]
- You're funny.
And after six months of sexual
tension
I'm not sure I get the joke.
- Ah well um, here's the thing.
About those plans, um something
came up.
I have to cancel.
A family emergency.
- What a coincidence.
Me too.
[upbeat party music]
- Uh, I kinda don't remember
that part of the evening.
- Actually I kind of
like this side of you.
Makes me hot.
Aunt Margaret on the other
hand is a little less enthused.
- Well she'll get over
it 'cause she's old.
- We need a distraction.
We need to do something special
for her over the holidays.
This could kill the deal Sophie.
- Yeah well some things
just aren't meant to be.
- Trust me a 50 million dollar
land deal is meant to be.
- I don't really care about
money.
[laughing]
- Since when?
- I just went to law school
to make my Dad happy,
and then I bought a house
and I was supporting
my husband's artistic--
How much money?
- 50 mil give or take.
- No.
You're going to have to
do this one on your own.
- No way.
You got me into this
jam with Aunt Margaret.
You're going to help me get out.
We need to spend some time with
her.
Some quality family time.
- Psst.
- Not now Sylvia.
Just one second.
Why are you eavesdropping?
- I know what you're trying to
do.
You're trying to dump Jake
so you can seduce other man
at spa lodge.
- I'm not going to--
- This other man he know you're
coming?
- Maybe.
- You need to do like Margareta
on
[speaks foreign language].
She bring one man to make
distraction
while she try to do
sex with the other man.
Like man decoy, hm?
So other man not think
you are crazy stalker.
- Yeah that's a good idea but
how am I going to find a guy
in the next 10 minutes?
You are a very clever woman
Sylvia.
- I want a raise.
- You got it.
Would you take my bags?
[engine humming]
[groaning]
Look I'm sorry we had to drive
all night
but I still don't know how it's
my fault
that the limo broke down.
- This reminds me of rehab.
Why did we go to Palm Beach
again?
- Let's get Aunt Margaret
checked in.
Come on dear.
[grunting]
- Okay.
No, no, no I'll get these.
Geez.
- [Marcia] I just thought it
would be nice
to have our parents here.
- They won't allow your
Dad and his cigars in here.
- Maybe it's silly at our
age to make such a big deal.
- Yeah.
- You've got to be kidding me.
What is that woman doing here?
Did you tell her we were coming
here?
Dave you promised me that she
was gone.
Okay, okay, you know
what, let me handle it.
- Five minutes and I come out
swinging.
- Okay, okay I got it.
Uh let me guess, you were
just in the neighborhood.
- Uh yeah well actually
I'm on a business trip.
- At Christmas.
- Family business and I totally
forgot
that you were going to be here.
- So it was just a funny
coincidence.
- [Sophie] Hilarious.
- Okay.
- Hey girl.
- Hi.
- Your associate?
- Client / boyfriend.
He's rich and handsome and
totally lusting after my body.
Actually the real reason
I'm here is 'cause
I have to keep you
from marrying Marcia Wade.
It's not that she's not a nice
person
because I think she is really
deep down.
- Oh my god you're a stalker.
- Yes, no, yes, no.
The real, real reason I'm
here is because all that stuff
I told you about, you and
me being married, is true
and I have to reverse that
botched Christmas wish
and get back to my own real life
and that all starts with you.
- Sophie.
- Go back, just, just back.
- Look I know I wasn't
the most attentive wife
and I should have been more
supportive of your career
and I kind of let myself go.
You think I'm crazy because
hello,
but I really have to try.
I have to try really hard
and I'm running out of time.
- Hey.
- Hi, Jake, Dave, Dave Jake.
- Hey, I've got the key to our
room.
You ready?
- Yes, okay.
I'll talk to you later?
Save me.
- Who was that guy?
- My husband.
[grunting]
Could you help me please?
[electric razor buzzing]
I can't believe there
was only one room left.
- [Jake] She really likes you,
you know.
- Oh who?
- [Jake] Aunt Margaret.
- Oh I really got that feeling
when we were at the last
truck stop and she ripped
the Twinkie out of my hand.
- She admires your independence.
Me on the other hand she
considers to be a very bad boy.
- Yeah.
- You see you're forgetting our
deal.
- Oh the land transfer deal.
The contracts are right over
there.
- No our other deal.
[laughing]
- You know I think that Morris
forgot to pack that file.
- Whoa whoa whoa wait wait wait.
How do you think your firm got
this gig in the first place?
- Because I'm a really hard
worker with an eye for fairness.
[laughing]
- Guess again.
- Because I'm a ruthless cow
who's willing to sleep her way
into the big leagues.
- Look you get what you want.
I get what I want.
- You really think that's
what it takes to get ahead?
- Yeah, it helps.
It's that guy isn't it?
Who the hell is he anyway?
- He's a really great architect.
He's an old friend.
Small time land developer.
- Are you trying to screw
me out of this land deal?
Because if you are--
- Believe me I have no
interest in your land deal
and your inheritance.
None.
- You mean, you won't sleep
with me
just because I'm rich and
powerful?
- I would never sleep with
someone to get ahead, okay?
- I finally found a woman
who likes me for me.
Oh Sophie, oh Sophie.
- Just hold that thought for
one minute.
Hello, is this the Bay Ridge
Mall?
I have a bit of an emergency.
I need to know what time the
mall closes.
Or at least the Santa station.
Okay, thank you very much.
[phone beeps]
[ominous music]
Please don't hit me.
- How dare you suggest that
we call off this wedding?
- Listen I know how
this looks, and trust me
you don't want to know
the real reason I'm here
any more than the lie
I'm about to tell you,
so why don't you just
give me a few minutes
to talk with him alone.
- Just stay away from my fiance.
If I catch you within two
feet of us while we are here,
I am getting a restraining
order.
[ominous music]
I was thinking with the
snow capped mountains
in the background, the
patio would be perfect
for our wedding photos.
And this room could be a
fantastic place to have
an intimate dinner with
our closest friends and--
- Well this is going to be
interesting.
- Oh yes, flowers, we need
flowers...
- What am I doing?
I'm just stupid.
- I'm on to you dear.
- Oh?
- At first I assumed you
were simply after my nephew
but then I realized
you're too smart for him.
And so the question remains,
what is it exactly that you
want.
- Oh to close the deal
and all that corporate--
- Who is that man?
- You know what, you
wouldn't understand it.
- Trust me honey, at my
age nothing you could say
would shock me.
- My husband.
- I see.
- It's a long story.
- Stories are in the past dear.
What's to do about it now.
- Oh I don't know.
I don't even know why I'm here.
I should be at home reading
the Grinch, stuffing stockings,
resenting my in laws.
I made just a terrible mistake.
- You know, wealth
always came easy for me.
Success a snap.
But family, children, a man
that I love,
I didn't want any of that.
Wasn't possible with my career.
Heck I invented 24/7.
But you, I think there's
something else for you.
You know dear, if there is
something else or someone else
who inspires you--
- There's four other people.
But I'm afraid I might
have lost them forever.
- Unless you get that man.
- I don't know.
It's all I have to go on right
now.
- Well then go.
- But you don't understand,
I've been trying.
Oh my gosh.
- Oh stop your whining already.
Go after him before it's too
late.
- Okay.
You're right, you're right,
thank you.
Why am I so nervous.
I've known this man forever.
Keep it together Sophie, keep
it together.
Hey.
Psst.
Dave.
- Since when do you do yoga?
- Since when do you wear
a matching track suit?
- It was a gift.
- I'm sorry I'm just used
to seeing you in those
funky old sweats.
- Those sweats are a classic.
- I know I just washed them.
They're sitting there unfolded
in the laundry basket.
- Shh.
- Okay.
- Look, I also know
that you just found out
that you need glasses.
[gong ringing]
I bet even in this alternate
reality
you're trying to get
your band back together.
You know, your old band?
Dave, you won't buy coffee
from Starbucks because
you think it's ridiculous
that they call a small coffee
tall.
Now look even if half of
what I say you believe,
I need you to just--
- You again.
That's it.
I'm calling security.
I am not going to let
you get away with this.
- Marcia, Marcia, wait, wait.
[gong ringing]
- Um, very relaxing class thank
you.
Ohm.
- First she took over my
business and now she's trying to
sabotage my wedding,
my kundalini, my life.
- Dave?
- Don't you take one step
closer.
- Look Marcia I know
that you're upset with me
and I can't blame you, but--
- Sophie's just an old friend
who's going through a tough
time.
- Old friend, don't
you mean old girlfriend
who you still have a thing for?
- No I--
I'm, well, I don't know, I
didn't expect any of this.
- Damn you Dave Kelly you've
had cold feet
ever since she got here the
other day.
- You have?
- Just take this okay?
Take it, take it.
- That's my ring.
- No it's my ring.
- Excuse me.
- Excuse me.
- It's my ring.
- Excuse me.
- Ah okay just--
[grunting]
[metal ring pinging]
[gasping]
[whooshing]
[splatting]
- Get out of my way!
Excuse me.
- It is not I just had it
cleaned.
- Get back.
- It's my ring and I want it.
- Would you stop.
- Where is it?
- I got it, I got it,
it's mine and you're not
getting it back from me.
- Give me the ring.
- No it's mine.
[cake splattering]
[grunting]
- I got it, I have it.
[cake splattering]
[crowd gasping]
- No, no Marcia no, no.
[grunting]
No, Sophie, Sophie, please
Sophie.
[grunting]
[cake splattering]
- Is that enough for you?
Did you want some more?
- [Dave] Marcia, Sophie, Sophie
come on.
- Where is it now?
- I don't know.
- It's gone.
And I was supposed to
be on a low carb diet.
[sighing]
Hey.
- Oh great.
- No, no please.
Come here--
- You can't be serious.
- I want to apologize.
Please, sit down.
Honestly I'm really sorry.
I didn't mean to make you hate
me.
I was kind of immature back
there.
Although you were the first
person to hit me in the face.
- I was.
- We used to be friends.
What happened to us?
- Girl plague.
You know that female
competitive thing
that kicks in somewhere between
middle school and death?
- I am sorry.
I know you think I'm
crazy and that I'm trying
to ruin your life and I would
explain my twisted rationale
but you wouldn't believe
it unless you were six
and waiting for Santa Clause.
- What is it with this time of
year?
- Brings out the worst in
everyone.
- I don't know why we do it to
ourselves
because I am tired.
- So am I.
- It's not the men in our
lives, you now.
It's that women want
to impress each other.
They just want to out
Superwoman the next person.
And you now what we really want
to do
is open a bottle of wine, sit
on a beach,
and thank god that we weren't
born in the Middle Ages.
- Yeah but the corsets were
kind of hot.
- Well.
- This is the worst Christmas
ever.
- At least you got the guy.
- Really?
- Yeah, Dave still has a thing
for you.
He confessed.
And I think you should go for
it.
It's okay.
Weirdly, very weirdly, I kinda
think that Jake Lasky's cute.
- I could so hook you up.
- Oh really?
Happy New Year Marcia.
- Thanks.
- So what is it that you do
when you're not breaking hearts?
- I'm an architect.
- Condos, shopping malls?
- No not that kind of architect.
I'm more of an idealist
than a mogul I guess.
Current project I have
is a state of the art
community center with
pools and soccer fields
and a non-profit daycare.
Kind of like a place
for parents and families
who could never afford private.
- Sounds wonderful.
- Yeah and it will be
as soon as we can find
someone to donate the land.
Quite a legacy.
- Yes.
Yes, it would be.
As my father always said,
the true measure of a man
is not about the deal in
hand, it's what he does next
that makes him great.
- Dave?
Dave, I've got to go.
- Thanks for the drink.
- Hey, come here.
I've got something to tell you.
- I've got one minute.
- Thank you so much for coming
with me.
- Well you were rushing
around and we didn't really
get the chance to talk to one
another, so.
- Yeah it was crowded.
I can't believe that Margaret
Lasky gave you all that land.
- Well she didn't give it to me,
she gave it to the kids of the
city.
What's something like that
worth?
10 million, 15?
Wow, Merry Christmas.
- Life is full of surprises.
- Yeah it is.
You know Margaret also said
that if I were to let you go
I'd be a fool.
Sophie, I don't know, I
mean 90% of this stuff
you talk about just sounds
absolutely ridiculous.
But then you describe that life
and it sounds pretty great.
- Well it's messy and it's noisy
and we never get to sleep alone.
Oh my god I forgot a
turkey, I forgot a turkey.
I need one of those that
are already thawed out
and those prosciutto things
that you love
and my Mom, and the Christmas
tree.
I wonder if you fixed the
Christmas tree.
Oh gee I have a deposition,
okay I'll wear that black wrap
dress.
- Do you know what Sophie
you have not changed
one little bit.
- What?
- Isn't this exactly why we
broke up in the first place?
You always had something on the
go.
Honestly I think you woke up
one morning and you forgot to
put me on your to do
list and that was that.
How much time do you have to
figure out
this magical curse thing?
- Oh god, just a few minutes.
- I don't know whether to kiss
you or have you committed.
- Maybe both.
Okay.
Here's the mall.
Wish me luck.
Okay.
- [Dave] Okay.
- This is it.
- Sophie I really hope you
find what you're looking for.
- Yeah me too, I--
Wait!
[joyful Christmas music]
[gasping]
Oh my god I'm still here.
That was supposed to be a magic
kiss.
I did everything you told me to
do.
I went back to the beginning
and the beginning is Dave
and I'm still here.
Oh god.
- Sophie what are you doing?
- Don't you see it didn't work.
I have to go back and
find that stupid Santa.
- No, no isn't it enough
that I'm willing to
go through this with you again.
I mean come on you don't have
to go on
with this charade, okay.
You won, you got me.
I'm yours.
So enough with the fairy tales.
- It's not a fairy tale Dave.
It's my life, it's your
life, it's our kids' life.
- Sophie, please don't go in
there.
Stay with me please.
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Let me in, let me in please!
Oh god, I have to try.
I know there's a back door.
Dave, wait for me.
Santa!
Santa please, Santa!
Santa!
Oh god.
Santa.
No.
No, no.
[sobbing]
- So I got you the tree
and presents for children,
whoever they are.
- Thank you Sylvia, no really,
than you.
- You owe me 78 bucks and
I want time and a half
for working Christmas Eve.
- Wow, that's fair, you deserve
that.
And something a lot more.
Here.
- I have keys.
- No, for the house.
I want you to have it.
- You going to take pills or
put your head in the oven?
- No I'm not.
- I'll be out tomorrow.
I want you to have it.
It's not really my style.
- I know.
[sighing]
[melancholy music]
- Aw.
[bells chiming]
- You're busy later, right Mom?
But it's for school.
You're busy later, right Mom?
Maybe I should have asked for
a Mom who cares about my life.
- Oh Nikki.
Oh I forgot your play.
- How you holdin' up?
- My whole life I've been so
worried
about accomplishing everything,
you know,
being the best, being in charge,
being right.
I've been so wrapped up in my
own race to I don't know where
I'm missing the stuff that
matters along the way.
The things I should
have taken time to enjoy
like kissing my husband
and really listening to Anna
sing.
Those little morning snuggles
with JJ
and little Nikki, that play
was so important to her
and she was too proud to tell
me.
Oh, how could I let it happen?
How could I get so busy
that I'm actually missing my
own life?
I thought I wasn't doing enough,
but Dave had me all figured out.
My problem has always been
trying to do too much.
- Balance is important.
- Yeah it is.
But it's too late now, huh?
[melancholy music]
What?
- Well you see I just got back
from a quick run to Vegas.
This librarian who had a thing
for the Cirque du Soleil,
you know the dirty one?
You think I'm giving up this
easy on my Ma's meatballs?
I'm still running on Vegas
time, so this watch says
we still got 10 minutes
to get you back home.
[gasping]
What do you want for Christmas,
Sophie?
[bells ringing]
- All I want for
Christmas is my life back.
[ethereal music]
I'm home.
[gasping]
I'm home.
Is anybody here?
I'm up.
- Mom's awake, Mom's awake!
- Honey, you have no idea
how glad I am to see you.
- We got a puppy from Santa.
Mom did you see our new puppy?
[puppy barking]
His name's Joey Ramone.
Joey, come on.
- Joey Ramone?
- Joey!
[laughing]
- He's so cute.
Honey where's Daddy?
- He's in the kitchen.
- Lets go.
[child laughing]
Honey!
- What are you doing up?
You are supposed to be resting.
You had a fever of 103.
- Oh my god how long was I out?
- A few days.
The doctor said it was acute
exhaustion.
- Wait, wait, what about
the presents and the food
and is my mother here--
- Just don't worry about it.
We're doing a pot luck, we've
got everything under control.
Your sister's going to
bring those yams with the
disgusting little marshmallow
things.
So listen, hey hey hey.
Go back to bed.
I've got, I'm in charge, so go
on you little control freak.
- Oh my gosh go!
- No no no no no.
- Hey honey.
- Hi Mom, are you feeling
better?
- Yeah I am.
Look I'm really sorry
about missing your play.
- It's okay.
It was just some stupid drama
class thing.
- No it wasn't.
It was important and I
should have been there.
- It's okay Mom, really.
- Look, things are going to
be different from now on.
I promise.
I'm still going to forget a few
things
and I'm going to need your help
with that
but I'm going to try
to just, I don't know,
just be here with you and
not wish my life away.
- Mom, you are here.
- Yeah, I am.
- Okay who wants crispy
pancakes?
- Why do they smell like
meatballs?
Mom, do you smell meatballs?
- Yeah I smell meatballs.
- Mom, promise me you're not
going to be
one of those parents who quits
their job to stay at home
and then spends all their
time bugging their kids.
- I promise.
- No no no don't.
My 50 million dollar deal.
Margaret Lasky just gave that
land away.
- Well, take this up the
mountain Bob.
- Resignation?
[upbeat music]
- So how did Bob react?
- It was magnificent.
- I'm looking slimmer
these days don't you think?
- So who's our first client?
- Margareta DeSouza, some
big time real estate mogul.
[upbeat Christmas music]
- [Mom Narrator] Ah Christmas.
Everyone's favorite time of the
year.
Those magical days in December
when anything seems possible.
[alarm ringing]
Except if you happen to be me.
- Give me back my brush.
- It's mine!
- No It's my brush, my brush.
- Guys, guys please, please can
we stop?
[children arguing loudly]
Just give her the brush Anna,
please.
Sophie have you seen my glasses?
- Give it back!
- Guys I said no shouting.
- It's mine, give me back my
brush.
- Okay, you're not listening.
Go, kitchen.
[child shrieks]
- [Older Child] Give it back.
- [Younger Child] It's mine.
- It's over there.
- Thank you.
Pancakes in five minutes.
- Quiet!
These last few years,
Christmas seems like another
sugar coated to do on
my already bloated list.
Women everywhere are expected
to conjure their inner Marthas
and do it all.
Mommies / supermodels.
Gourmet chefs.
Of course there's the
decorating.
[baby crying]
Doesn't it just make you want
to sing?
[baby crying]
[Mom moaning]
[Mom sighing]
Whoopsie, there we go.
Oh Annie honey, please.
Put on your socks.
- Toes hurt, toes hurt.
- Yeah well nothing is
worse than cold feet.
[puke splattering]
[baby burping]
Except for barf on the Lasky
brief and a 10 year old hooker.
Okay sweet cheeks wash it off.
Is that my heirloom
engagement ring, Nikki?
Give it to me.
- But it's for school.
- Go, wash, now.
- I hate you.
- Santa heard that.
[groaning]
Oh are those yesterday's
clothes?
Please tell me you weren't
up all night working.
- Okay I won't but I was.
You have got to see my new
design for the Community Center.
It's, Soph I really think
we've got a shot at this one.
- Hallelujah.
- [Dad] Oh thanks.
- It's just that honey, I
think that Nikki needs braces
and my transmission's shot.
You know it would be really
great if you got this job.
[sniffing]
- I know that starting my
own firm has always seemed
kind of speculative to you,
but look I'm a good architect.
I'm good at my job.
I'm going to get work.
- Yeah you have one job, I have
10.
- Excuse me?
- I can't be late.
Go on get your stuff.
Alright you guys I cannot be
late.
Nikki, Anna, come on hurry up.
- Okay listen, you go.
I will take JJ to daycare.
- No, no, no I have him, I have
him.
[sighing]
- Soph listen, let me do it.
- No, no, no, I have
everything under control David.
I'm fine.
Girls, now, let's go, go, go!
Oh gosh.
- Come on sweetie.
Love you guys.
[horn beeping]
[kids arguing and singing]
- Okay.
Anna just stop for a
second please, thank you.
- Can we see Santa after school?
- We're busy later right Mom?
- Oh yeah I'm busy.
After lunch I have a staff
meeting.
I have the contracts at two.
I have a deposition at four
and I sure hope that Bob
doesn't expect me
to work late tonight again.
- That's all, that's all
you have on your schedule?
- Mom I wanna see Santa.
- Okay girls, we're almost
at the front of the line.
Get ready.
- Why does no one ever listen
to me?
- I can sing for him.
Jingle bell jingle
bell jingle all the way
- Please Anna anything but that
song.
Anything, I can't bear to hear
it again.
Okay.
- I decided I want a puppy from
Santa.
Do you think he'll get me a
puppy?
- Mom, hello?
- Nikki, my first born apple
of my eye, gem of my life.
What is with you today?
Alright, girls, we're here.
Get it together.
Alright girls, come on.
Let's go, go go go.
Good you've got your backpack.
Good go.
Goodbye honey I love you.
I love you, bye.
Bye girls.
[ominous music]
- Sophie Kelly are you avoiding
me?
- Hey neighbor, no of course
not.
- Did you bring your
cookies for the bake sale?
- They're cooling on the rack.
- It's just awesome of you to
volunteer.
I don't know how you do
it, you Superwoman you.
- Yay.
[sighing]
[school bell ringing]
- So your Mom really forgot
about the Christmas play today?
- Yeah I even put my
makeup on to remind her.
- And what'd she say?
- She called me a hooker
and then made my Dad upset.
- Whoa.
What's a hooker?
[ominous music]
- They man's a donkey who
says it's my own fault
I signed a contract with no
benefits.
I hope this baby knows how to
file.
- You alright Claire?
- Do I look like a whale?
- No.
- Okay.
- You're beautiful.
Oh my gosh.
- Oh thank Hades.
Bob is choking on his All Bran.
Gosh did I miss the Lasky
meeting?
- They were early.
I swear that woman gets
up at five in the morning
just to sharpen her horns.
Here they come.
- Mark, rest assured this firm--
- Quick, duck!
- Will be at your back and call
24 / 7.
- That man is vile, vile!
- Okay look, I need you
to print me up a new copy
of this contract and send
some cookies to school
and rough them up a bit so they
look like they're home made.
You're an angel, thank you.
- You're my goddess.
Which is why it is with
deep regret that I have to
give you the latest.
- What do you mean you're
going to give the Lasky account
to Chuck?
My work on this file has been
spotless.
Figuratively speaking.
- So when I climbed Everest
last year I had the best guide
in Nepal.
Got caught on the peak, ice
storm, 40 below, lost my pick.
Sherpa saved my ass.
- That's a beautiful story
Bob, what's your point.
- You leave work early
several times a week.
- Yeah well things have
been a little hectic lately.
- Well there's a major
property deal for the firm.
I just don't know if you're
the right person to be
up on that mountain right now.
- Excuse me?
- Well ever since you came
back from your last kid,
and believe me motherhood
is the most important job
in the world.
I just think you may have lost
your edge.
- Lost my edge?
I'm edgy.
No edge.
- We're making that push for
the top.
You gotta be able to
depend on your whole team
to get you there.
- I'm here for you Bob.
Look at me.
Okay I might have a run in my
stockings
but I am here for you.
- Oh come on, when push comes
to shove
what's it going to be?
24 / 7 with the Laskys or
little Angela's got pneumonia.
- Her name is Annie and she
refuses to put on warm socks.
- Not all Mommies can
reach the peak Sophie.
- Or the corner office.
- Sophie, Sophie, Sophie.
Come on, time is money.
[knocking]
- Come in.
- Hey sis.
- Hi.
Do you ever call first?
- More spontaneous this way.
So did we ever decide what
we were going to get Mom yet?
- We were supposed to get
her something last week.
- Is this some sort of passive
aggressive
sibling order thing?
- No, no, no, I'll get
her something tonight.
I've got to go to the mall.
- No, tonight you're
putting on a pretty dress
and making nice with the
clients.
- My god the office party.
- Any single men for me?
- No.
- Just for that I'm going
to bring the mashed yams
with the little colored
marshmallows for Christmas
dinner.
- Oh I forgot I was going to
host that.
I volunteered.
- After she got drunk
drinking two shots of tequila
at Mom and Dad's anniversary
party.
- Not a good day.
- See ya.
- Bye honey.
[sighing]
[metal clanking]
- The chair, I know, I'm on it.
- [Announcer] Attention holiday
shoppers,
there's only four days
left 'til Christmas.
Be sure to stop by our
Santa's Village to get your
photo with Santa.
[upbeat Christmas music]
- [Sophie] Oh baby please.
- [Child] I'm going
first, I'm going first.
- [Sophie] It's going to be
great.
Everything's going to be fine.
Would you guys stop arguing,
please.
Santa's going to hear you.
Okay just stand quietly
you're almost there.
- [Child] No I'm the one going
first.
Mom said I could.
- Hey Dave?
Dave?
Pick up the phone.
My battery's dying Dave,
please pick up the phone.
I'm at the mall.
I'm trying to get a dress and
I need you to take care of--
[squealing]
The kids because I have
this office party tonight.
Pick up the phone.
Honey!
[growling]
- Sophie?
- Marcia Wade.
- Oh my gosh.
What's it been 15 years?
- You look the same if that's
possible.
- Well you look healthy.
Tell me this isn't yours.
- Yeah he looks just like Dave.
My other two are other there.
- Mom, Mom!
- Get your rat nest hairdo out
of my face!
- Mom!
- Kids, you ever think about
them?
- Well let's just say the men I
date,
we're not spending a lot of
time thinking about babies.
[laughing]
I can't believe you and
Dave are still together.
- Yeah.
- God we used to have
so much fun in school.
- [Sophie] I know.
- You know, we should
get together for a drink.
Catch up properly.
- Yeah, you still at Coltrane
and Brock?
- It's Wade, Coltrane and Brock.
I took the whole thing over.
[baby screaming and crying]
- Oh well.
- You'd better call.
Martinis.
- Not gonna happen.
Here's your binky.
Nikki, please.
[baby crying]
Oh that's good.
Honey, it's time to see Santa.
- He looks weird.
- Uh well, no honey, come on.
Over here.
Santa is your friend.
Don't you want to tell
Santa your special wish?
- Uh uh.
- No?
Do you mind?
- [Santa] Come on.
- He doesn't bite, okay honey?
See it's okay.
- [Santa] Smile.
[shutter clicking]
And what does Mommy want for
Christmas.
- Her life.
[melancholy music]
[twinkling music]
It's your turn now.
Come on.
- [Santa] You must be Anna, huh?
Come here.
So what do you want for
Christmas.
- A puppy.
- [Santa] A puppy?
What kind of puppy?
- [Anna] A little snowball
puppy.
- [Santa] Snowball puppy?
- [Anna] Like that.
- [Santa] Okay.
Thanks a lot kid, Merry
Christmas.
- [Anna] Merry Christmas.
- Okay um, I've got 10
minutes to drive home
and then three minutes to shower
and then try on this dress.
Oh my gosh I hope this dress
fits.
I really do.
Hey watch that, it's kinda hot
okay?
- You know Santa said
I could have a puppy.
- You know Santa sometimes
brings other things.
Come here.
Santa brings other things
that you might not have asked
for okay?
- Maybe I should have asked for
a Mom
who cares about my life.
- You know you promised
that if I bought you some hot
chocolate
you'd stop complaining
for five minutes, alright?
- How can I?
This is the worst day ever.
- Agreed.
Keys, keys, where are my keys?
Oh god of randomly missing
things don't do this to me now.
[keys jingling]
Honey give me the keys.
Anna, stop it.
Just give me the keys.
[keys jingling]
Anna, stop it.
Anna please.
- Mom this is so boring
can we please just go?
- I know, look, I would send
you to Venus
and leave you there if I could,
alright?
Anna what are you doing
with the hot chocolate?
Stop that!
[gasping]
My new dress!
Oh my gosh.
How could you do that?
How am I ever going to
get a dress that fits now.
[kids yelling]
[baby crying]
- You shut up!
[baby crying]
[twinkling music]
Shut up!
[thumping]
[groaning]
- Where am I?
What?
The furniture department?
Or am I being punked?
[TV actor speaking Spanish]
By Pablo Escobar's mother.
[voice speaking Spanish]
- Slut, Margareta!
[gasping]
Your lobster cobb is
almost ready Miss Sophie.
- I'm sorry did I scare you?
- Are you okay?
You don't look so good.
I told you, you're working too
hard.
I make you a nice herbal tea.
- This is definitely not my
life.
- Okay, martini.
- It's a dream, right?
It's a dream.
Woo it's a dream.
Of course.
An amazing gravity defying
dream.
[water gently splashing]
Maybe I died and went off
to real estate heaven.
[laughing]
Hello!
- [Santa] Well well it's you
again.
- Aren't you that Santa from
the mall?
- How do you like your present?
- Kidnapping and hair
extensions.
Very funny.
- Oh I gave you more than that
sweetheart.
I gave you a whole new life.
- You did this?
It isn't real.
I'm dreaming.
I'm sleeping.
This is a dream.
Obviously.
[gasping]
Aren't I?
- Nope.
- Get away from me.
- Listen lady, I'm just
trying to do my job here.
- And what kind of job is that?
Where are my kids?
Do you have my kids?
Where are my kids?
- Whoa whoa just relax.
Your kids are fine, such as
they are.
- Okay what is that supposed to
mean?
- I was sent here to help.
And myself incidentally.
I got into a bit of trouble on
my last job
trying to make business
associates disappear.
See the thing is I wound up
dead too.
Bad boy, I know, but then
this opportunity came up
to kind of make things right.
- Oh really and how is it
right that I'm standing here
half naked in the back yard of
a McMansion
I don't recognize with
a pool cleaning Santa
who claims he's dead.
- You see once a year,
the big guy outsources.
Hires a few schmucks to pick up
the slack,
make a few wishes come true.
So if I get this right,
I'll be enjoying my
dearly departed Ma's
meatballs by New Years.
- So you're dead and you need
me to help you get to heaven.
Could this be any more cliche.
- Look, from the minute
I saw you in the mall
I knew you was a desperate
woman.
And you needed your wish to
come true.
Come on, could this be any
more like what you dreamed of?
Perfect house, perfect life,
perfect uh...
- Look I don't have time for
perfect.
I have shopping to finish,
an office party not to enjoy,
Christmas dinner for 23 and a
husband
I still haven't finished
yelling at yet.
[laughing]
- It's good you haven't
lost your sense of humor.
You know I had this client in
Chicago,
he went absolutely postal
when I turned his Ma
into Joey Ramone.
[laughing]
- Okay I'm going home now.
[sighing]
[gasping]
Would you just stop that?
Okay I have to go home.
- They're not there Sophie.
- What do you mean they're not
there.
You can't just make an entire
person's life disappear
just like that.
- I can and I did.
- Well then bring them back.
It's time for dinner.
I need money for a taxi.
Do you have any?
Or is there a coach made
out of a pumpkin outside?
- No see that's the thing.
I'm still working the kinks
out of my return policy.
- What is that supposed to mean?
- That is for you to figure out.
Otherwise...
- Otherwise what?
- This one could be final sale.
- You mean I could be stuck
like this?
My entire family could be gone
forever?
- Afraid so.
- You can't do that.
- Sure I can, I'm Santa Clause.
- No, that's crazy.
Look...
[gasping]
[phone buttons beeping]
Please be there Dave.
Honey, please be there, please
be there, please be there.
- [Recorded Phone Voice]
The number you have reached
is no longer in service.
- No.
No!
[crying]
Not that can't be me.
Anna, Annie!
Dave!
Dave are you up here?
Annie!
Nikki!
Anybody?
My babies.
[gasping]
[keys jingling]
[melancholy music]
[knocking]
Dave!
[knocking]
Dave honey!
Nikki!
Anybody home?
It's me Mom!
[knocking]
It's me Mommy!
Mommy's home.
- If you're looking for the
O'Brians they're not home.
- Barbara I am so glad to see
you.
- Do I know you?
- Yes of course you know me.
I'm the flaky Mom from the PTA.
I forgot to return the
bicycle pump last Spring.
Barbara, I live next door to
you.
My daughter Nikki and your
daughter have been friends
since kindergarten, come on.
- I'm sorry I don't know a
Nikki either,
and as long as I can remember
the O'Brians live here.
All nine of them.
Do you need some help?
- No, I'll just be going now.
- Somebody's husband is in
trouble.
[water dripping]
[sighing]
- It's only temporary so
I might as well enjoy it.
[bubbles popping]
Wow!
[upbeat music]
Oh my gosh, I am so tired.
[laughing]
[moaning]
I feel fantastic.
I haven't had a full
night's sleep in years.
Good morning.
And good night.
[groaning]
[phone ringing]
Go away.
Hello?
- Hi Sophie, the Laskys are on
for 10.
- Morris?
You know me?
- Unfortunately.
Are you on your way.
- Alright I'll be there.
Soon.
[groaning]
Alright let's see what I have
to wear.
Look at this closet, it's all
in order.
[gasping]
Oh soft.
Wow.
These are all mine.
Whoever said a Kelly bag
doesn't make a woman feel
powerful was lying.
[ominous music]
[phone ringing]
Hi Claire.
- You know my name?
- Yeah.
- She's been pissy since you
refused
to give her maternity leave.
- You look great Morris.
- No, I will not work on
Christmas Day.
Did you get my message about
the client party on Thursday?
Oh and the travel agent called
about Aspen
and Bob is late again.
- Yeah well he is the boss.
- Yeah in his sad little
Italian loafer dreams
he has your job.
[gasping]
- Not all Mommies can reach the
peak.
But I can.
I have waited my entire career
for this.
- I get it.
Late night again last night
with your Tony Robbins
motivational tapes?
- Don't you have something to
do?
I'm kidding Morris, I'm kidding.
[weak laughter]
- I know.
- This is the life.
Bob?
Bob!
- Sorry I'm late my kid has the
flu.
- Oh my gosh really?
- No.
- A lawyer lying.
Bob, Bob, Bob.
Time is money.
- The Laskys are in the
conference room.
I think we've kept them
waiting long enough.
- Jake.
- Good morning.
- Margaret.
Okay Ms. Lasky, singing the
land transfer agreements.
Here you go.
- This land has been in the
Lasky family for generations.
Developed properly it could be
our legacy.
- Well I can assure you that
this is my
utmost priority right now
and that this is my...
And like I was saying I can
assure you--
- Do you find this amusing?
- Actually not and if you look
at this
you can tell that this is my
priority
and I'm on this job 24 / 7.
- Me too.
- Let's hope so.
- Alright well can you open
up and look on page one.
You're absolutely right
about those changes,
I will make them and I'm
sure you'll be very happy.
- I will see you later.
- Hypothetically speaking
does playing footsie
under the table in some
weird alternate universe
count as cheating on my husband
who quite possibly doesn't
even know we're married
and might actually not even
exist?
- Come again?
- What's going on with Jake
Lasky and me?
- You mean Jake Lasky the
most eligible bachelor
in the city?
- Yes.
- He's been after you for weeks.
- After me as in after me?
- Let's just say this land
transfer isn't the only deal
he's planning on sealing this
Christmas.
Way to score boss.
- Hey!
Hey you!
Weird Santa guy, hey!
[sighing]
[melancholy Christmas music]
I need therapy.
A little retail therapy.
[upbeat Christmas music]
- Sophie, we've got that Tory
Burch trench
you were asking about.
- Oh socks!
- I heard she's seeing Jake
Lasky.
What I wouldn't give for that
life.
Come on.
[sighing]
- Wow.
You come here twice a week?
[laughing]
That's fantastic.
Ah there goes 10 years of
stress.
[phone ringing]
Oh can you get that, I...
Thank you.
Hello?
- Where are you?
- I'm right where I belong.
[imitates buzzer buzzing]
- You're late for the
Christmas wish charity concert.
- No can do.
I have a date with a memory
foam mattress
after my nails dry.
- Sting is hosting.
- What?
Sting?
Oh my god Sting, I love
Sting, I love Sting.
What am I going to wear?
I can't go alone.
Do you want to come with me?
- No I have to meet my trainer.
What about Jake.
- Oh no I can't deal
with Mr. Freaky Footsie.
Not tonight.
What about Marcia Wade.
She said she wanted to go for a
drink.
- After you bankrupted her firm
last year?
- What?
Collateral damage after our
expansion.
It was magnificent.
- Oh I'm a slut and a tyrant.
Did you have any luck
with that list of Santas
from the Bay Ridge Mall?
- They referred me to
head office in Jersey.
- Oh, well keep trying.
- [Morris On The Phone] Yeah
I'm not even going to ask.
- Jill, it's me Sophie.
Your sister.
Do you like Sting?
Jill look at these shoes.
Aren't they crazy?
Look how high they are, it's
insane.
And this bag, it's got
this weird horn on it.
I bet it's really expensive.
I wanted to show you these.
Look, real diamonds.
- You're festive.
- Yeah I know well it's not
every night I get to go out
partying with my little
sis in a limo to see Sting,
come on.
- You have to admit it's a
little weird.
I mean all of a sudden
you're leaving messages
and insisting we go out.
- Yeah but we talk five
times a day, I mean come on.
Or maybe I think about
you five times a day.
Forgot to call?
- For a year?
- Oh god.
- I can understand that you
don't have enough time for me
but Mom and Dad?
- What?
What is wrong with Mom and Dad?
- Sophie, you missed their
50th anniversary party.
- Yeah well I probably
had some important--
- You don't need to make
excuses.
You know what Mom ad Dad are
like.
They're proud.
Your career took front seat
and they just learned to live
with it.
[melancholy music]
[crowd chattering]
- You know Jill, I'd really
like to apologize for all the
terrible things I've done,
but I really can't remember
what they are, so.
Look all I can say is I'm going
to make it up to you, okay?
Oh champagne, you want some?
No?
Come on honey let's have some
fun.
[gasping]
Look at this art.
Dave would love this.
- Dave?
Dave Kelly?
- Yeah.
- I haven't thought about him
in years.
Wonder what happened to him.
- Yeah I wonder too.
- Do you ever imagine what
your life would have been like
if you hadn't dumped him?
- Yeah lately a lot.
- He's just such a great guy.
- He is but sometimes--
- Are you kidding?
Me and my girlfriends we
were just so jealous of you.
- Really?
- Yes, he was just so arty and
into you.
Imagine it, you would have
had like the cutest kids,
big house, 2.5 kids.
- Medium house with three kids.
- Yeah right.
- What?
- I just can't picture you
as the mother of three.
The mother of anything.
- Jill I would make a very
disheveled but charming mother.
A very good one.
- You slay me.
- It's true.
- Sophie, remember you're a
lightweight.
- Not tonight.
- [Announcer] Ladies and
gentlemen please find your
seats.
Sting has arrived--
- Oh my gosh.
[crowd murmuring]
Oh my gosh that was such a
great event.
I wish that he would have sang
more than three or four songs.
It was four.
- You know I think I'm getting
a little bit tired, so.
- Tired?
What is it, it's nine o'clock.
- Club soda?
- Come on.
Three's dancing.
Woo hoo, come on girl.
- No no no no, Sophie, Sophie,
no no no.
[loud dance music]
[camera shutter clicking]
'Cause I don't want nobody
but you
[crowd cheering]
'Cause I don't want nobody
but you
[camera shutter clicking]
- Hello world!
- Get down Sophie we're
going to get arrested.
Sophie!
- Oh gosh who cares.
None of this is real anyway.
- Well I don't feel like
spending the night in jail.
- What happened to you?
What happened to my fun
loving little sister?
- Your fun living little
sister who has to wake up early
in the morning to buy a
Christmas present for Mom?
Don't worry I'll sign
your name on the card.
- Jilly, Jilly oh Jilly
Jilly Jilly flower.
- You're so weird.
You haven't called me that in
years.
It's almost like you're
back to your old self.
- I am my old self.
This is not my life.
It is not yours either.
- You're drunk.
- I love you.
- Well I was drinking
cran-sodas.
Here please.
[groaning]
- Look honey, Jill wait.
Can't we just spend the
holidays together.
We can do like we did when
we were kids when I would
let you eat all those
chocolate thingys, you know,
from the calendar.
And then we could make
some stockings and eat,
oh that Scotch salmon
from Nova Scotia is good.
- I have plans with friends
upstate.
- Bring them all along.
I've got a very big house
and trust me I've got cooking
for 20 down pat.
- Maybe we can do something
in the New Year, okay?
- Okay.
- Sleep well, thanks for
everything.
Drink lots of water and
Merry Christmas, okay?
- Merry Christmas.
[sighing]
[food sizzling]
[phone ringing]
[groaning]
I love pancakes.
Especially when they're burnt.
- Since when do you eat carbs?
- Is it always so quiet around
here?
- When you were dating
that guy from the city gym,
there was the sound of his
expensive electric shaver he
use.
[imitates buzzing shaver]
Though personally, I don't
think it's healthy for a man to
shave so much, you know, down
there.
[groaning]
Hey Sophie, where are you?
Hello?
Sophie?
Are you hiding?
Where did you go?
[melancholy Christmas music]
[kids chattering]
- Hi.
Hi oh, are your hands cold?
You should put your mittens on.
Wish I had some.
I'm sorry.
[sighing]
[melancholy music]
Anne? Nik?
[children chattering]
- Get your roasted chestnuts
here, hot roasted chestnuts.
Merry Christmas.
Get your roasted chestnuts
here, hot roasted chestnuts.
- You!
- Hey!
- You!
- Whoa with the violence again.
You know you would have
made a great wingman.
- You think this is funny?
What kind of Christmas present
is this?
- Hey, you're the one that
wished for the new life.
- What good is a new life when
the ghosts of your old life
keep coming back to haunt
you ever single day.
- You wanted the Manolos
sweetheart,
now you gotta walk the walk.
- Manolos gave me bunions in
the 90s
and now that I have kids
they don't even fit.
And speaking of my kids, where
are they?
Do they exist?
Will they ever exist?
And my husband?
Just please, just tell me what
to do to reverse this thing.
- Okay.
It's simple.
You just gotta figure out
what's really important.
- My family, my husband, shoes
that fit.
Isn't it obvious?
Oh please I would do
anything to just see them.
- Don't start crying geez.
[children chattering]
- Oh Nikki.
- [Kids] I love you Mommy.
I love you.
- Don't go, wait!
That's just mean!
I have no more time for riddles.
Just tell me what to do.
- I'm sorry.
It doesn't work that way.
You have gotta figure
this out on your own.
You gotta dig deep, you gotta
look for the soul of this.
When it comes you'll know.
You're gonna feel it, right
here.
- I screwed up, I know that.
Isn't that enough?
- Just start at the beginning,
the answer will come.
It starts with a D.
- Dave.
Okay the last time I was talking
to Dave I was mad at him.
Okay, so I need to find him
somewhere and apologize.
Okay.
- Oh and Soph, one more thing.
You've got 'til the close
Christmas Eve
to make any exchanges.
Get your roasted chestnuts
here, hot roasted chestnuts.
Low in sodium.
[light music]
- Hello?
Dave?
- You're early, I have--
Sophie?
- It's so good to see you.
- Did someone die.
- No, no, you look so great.
- What are you doing here.
- You know how hard it is to
find a good diner in the city?
There's one over there
and I thought I'd come by
and say hi.
Hi.
- Hi.
- Um could I come in?
- Um, yeah I guess so.
This way.
I'm just on my way out of town,
so.
- Wow this place is not
like I remembered it.
- Well when they turned
the building into condos
I decided to ramp it up a
little bit.
- You've designed buildings
all over the world.
I forgot how talented you are.
- Well my favorite is
this community center
I'm trying to get built
down by the water, but,
you know, no money, monster
hours.
- And kind too, I forgot that.
- Okay Sophie, why are you
really here?
- I thought that we
could catch up, you know.
Go over old times.
- Oh is this some kind of
closure thing
because honestly I'm good,
really.
- Oh wow, gee look at this.
Self-improvement.
From the Inside Out, you
working on that.
- Yeah it's a little holiday
break.
- At a health spa?
- Well I haven't had a vacation
in years,
or Christmas actually, so it's,
just call it my attempt at one.
- Oh god, we used to love
to go away before the kids.
- Kids?
- Ah, look what I'm going
to say is going to sound
a little weird.
- Go on.
- What if I told you that we
didn't break up in college
and that we did get
married and we have three
wonderful, amazing, slightly
ill-behaved children.
- Oh you know what I gotta go.
- No please let me explain.
See I was having this
really really horrible day
because Anna wouldn't wear her
socks,
and Nikki, she's going through
one of those weird phases
where she's talking
back and wearing makeup
and then JJ was throwing
up all over the place
and I found myself at the
mall and there was this
really, really weird Santa
and then I ran into Marcia Wade.
Do you remember Marcia Wade?
You know and she looks great
and I was yelling at you
on the phone and I'm really,
really sorry about that.
See this is me apologizing.
Anyone up there?
Come on.
Any time now, come on.
[fingers snapping]
- You know what I should call
someone.
Can I call someone for you?
- Look the point is I didn't
mean for my entire family
to disappear.
I just needed a good night's
sleep.
- Okay Sophie I gotta tell you,
you're freaking me out now.
- I know none of this makes
any sense to you or me
but maybe it will some day.
But the thing is in order
to reverse this thing
I need to find out what's
really important to me
and that begins with you.
It all starts with you, Dave.
You and me as a family.
Please.
- Why now, of all times why now.
- Dave from the bottom
of my heart I am so sorry
for not trying hard
enough and for making you
have your office in the laundry
room.
- Uh hey, honey can you believe
it?
Sophie was just in the
neighborhood and--
- Honey?
- Let me fill you in since I'm
guessing
Dave hasn't gotten around to it.
- Well I was just about to.
- Fill me in on what Dave?
- It's an interesting story.
- Yes a tragedy with a happy
ending.
After you put me out
of business last year,
you know bankrupting
my firm and putting me
and my 25 employees out of work,
I had a little time on my
hands so I ran a marathon,
took up crochet and reconnected
with a few old friends
from college, like Dave.
- Facebook.
- Anyway one thing led
to the next and well,
we're both still single.
- Your mother's heirloom
engagement ring, it's mine.
- It's going to be a
simple wedding really.
Just us, some relaxing
yoga and some massage.
- You're getting married?
- On Christmas Eve.
- You love her.
You forgot all about me.
How did this happen?
- Well I'm sorry Sophie but you
and I,
that was a long time ago.
- I'm going to go to work.
- Probably.
- What?
She just showed up.
- Oh come on Sophie, you're the
CEO
of one of the biggest law
firms in the whole city.
Just get it together,
just get it together.
[crying and sniffling]
Hi.
- Hello.
- You hate me don't you.
- Hate is a very strong word.
- Well I'm a terrible
boss, I'm a bad mother,
I'm an awful person.
Oh god I hate this mascara.
And those eyelash curlers, you
know,
guys could never use them.
I'm a 60 percenter in
a hundred percent world
and now I'm being punished.
- Do you want me to get Morris?
- I just have to try harder.
I have to start with you.
What can I do to make your life
better?
- Seriously?
- Yeah.
- Well the whole maternity
leave policy sucks.
I mean how am I seriously
expected to be back on the job
two weeks after I have this
baby?
I need to be able to be a good
lawyer
and be a decent parent.
- You know what, take as
much time as you need.
- Can I get that in writing?
- Yeah, yeah, Morris will draw
it up.
- Wow, thank you.
Really.
- Call it new appreciation
for the working Mom.
[sobbing]
[upbeat Christmas music]
- So how is it that the new
most popular girl in school
isn't even at her own soiree?
- Have you ever wished that
you had a different life?
[laughing]
- Yeah like only every day.
See, this is my happy work face.
- Alright alright, I officially
apologize for being a pain
to work with.
Okay?
- What about my last employee
review where you called me fat
and said that if I didn't lose
weight
it would be bad for the
company's image.
- You look great.
- I know.
- Yeah, you know my whole
career I've wondered
what it would be like
if I focused on the job
instead of my family
and here it is.
I've destroyed every important
relationship I've ever had.
For what?
80 pairs of shoes.
Time to put on my makeup.
Big empty house.
God.
- Well if there's anything I
can do.
- Can you keep a secret?
- What a fantastic story.
A wiseguy Santa, lingerie and a
fur coat.
- You don't think I'm crazy?
- Oh yeah, absolutely, but
your story gives me hope.
- Don't you see, if I don't
figure out
how to reverse this thing by
Christmas Eve
I'm in danger of losing my
family forever.
- Well for starters you
have to stop Marcia Wade
from marrying Dave.
- Yeah but how can I do that.
He thinks I'm crazy.
He doesn't even know who I am
any more.
- Well then he needs
to get to re-know you.
Remember what he loved about
you in the first place.
Listen you took Marcia Wade
down once, you can do it again.
- But that was business.
I don't want to take anybody
down.
Besides, we used to be friends.
- Santa said start at the
beginning.
Your family begins with the two
of you.
Besides it wouldn't look
very good if you just
let your husband run off
and marry somebody else.
- You're right, you're right.
I've gotta get to that spa.
- I'll book you a room.
- Do you think I could
really win him back?
- Sophie, you are ruthless,
cruel and have fantastic teeth.
I know you can.
[car horn beeping]
- Sylvia the car's early.
Bye!
[ominous music]
Jake, what?
- Would you mind explaining
to me why you've not
been returning my phone calls?
- Well you know Christmas, busy
busy busy.
- Odd response considering
I'm your biggest client
and we made plans to spend
the holiday together.
- We did?
[laughing]
- You're funny.
And after six months of sexual
tension
I'm not sure I get the joke.
- Ah well um, here's the thing.
About those plans, um something
came up.
I have to cancel.
A family emergency.
- What a coincidence.
Me too.
[upbeat party music]
- Uh, I kinda don't remember
that part of the evening.
- Actually I kind of
like this side of you.
Makes me hot.
Aunt Margaret on the other
hand is a little less enthused.
- Well she'll get over
it 'cause she's old.
- We need a distraction.
We need to do something special
for her over the holidays.
This could kill the deal Sophie.
- Yeah well some things
just aren't meant to be.
- Trust me a 50 million dollar
land deal is meant to be.
- I don't really care about
money.
[laughing]
- Since when?
- I just went to law school
to make my Dad happy,
and then I bought a house
and I was supporting
my husband's artistic--
How much money?
- 50 mil give or take.
- No.
You're going to have to
do this one on your own.
- No way.
You got me into this
jam with Aunt Margaret.
You're going to help me get out.
We need to spend some time with
her.
Some quality family time.
- Psst.
- Not now Sylvia.
Just one second.
Why are you eavesdropping?
- I know what you're trying to
do.
You're trying to dump Jake
so you can seduce other man
at spa lodge.
- I'm not going to--
- This other man he know you're
coming?
- Maybe.
- You need to do like Margareta
on
[speaks foreign language].
She bring one man to make
distraction
while she try to do
sex with the other man.
Like man decoy, hm?
So other man not think
you are crazy stalker.
- Yeah that's a good idea but
how am I going to find a guy
in the next 10 minutes?
You are a very clever woman
Sylvia.
- I want a raise.
- You got it.
Would you take my bags?
[engine humming]
[groaning]
Look I'm sorry we had to drive
all night
but I still don't know how it's
my fault
that the limo broke down.
- This reminds me of rehab.
Why did we go to Palm Beach
again?
- Let's get Aunt Margaret
checked in.
Come on dear.
[grunting]
- Okay.
No, no, no I'll get these.
Geez.
- [Marcia] I just thought it
would be nice
to have our parents here.
- They won't allow your
Dad and his cigars in here.
- Maybe it's silly at our
age to make such a big deal.
- Yeah.
- You've got to be kidding me.
What is that woman doing here?
Did you tell her we were coming
here?
Dave you promised me that she
was gone.
Okay, okay, you know
what, let me handle it.
- Five minutes and I come out
swinging.
- Okay, okay I got it.
Uh let me guess, you were
just in the neighborhood.
- Uh yeah well actually
I'm on a business trip.
- At Christmas.
- Family business and I totally
forgot
that you were going to be here.
- So it was just a funny
coincidence.
- [Sophie] Hilarious.
- Okay.
- Hey girl.
- Hi.
- Your associate?
- Client / boyfriend.
He's rich and handsome and
totally lusting after my body.
Actually the real reason
I'm here is 'cause
I have to keep you
from marrying Marcia Wade.
It's not that she's not a nice
person
because I think she is really
deep down.
- Oh my god you're a stalker.
- Yes, no, yes, no.
The real, real reason I'm
here is because all that stuff
I told you about, you and
me being married, is true
and I have to reverse that
botched Christmas wish
and get back to my own real life
and that all starts with you.
- Sophie.
- Go back, just, just back.
- Look I know I wasn't
the most attentive wife
and I should have been more
supportive of your career
and I kind of let myself go.
You think I'm crazy because
hello,
but I really have to try.
I have to try really hard
and I'm running out of time.
- Hey.
- Hi, Jake, Dave, Dave Jake.
- Hey, I've got the key to our
room.
You ready?
- Yes, okay.
I'll talk to you later?
Save me.
- Who was that guy?
- My husband.
[grunting]
Could you help me please?
[electric razor buzzing]
I can't believe there
was only one room left.
- [Jake] She really likes you,
you know.
- Oh who?
- [Jake] Aunt Margaret.
- Oh I really got that feeling
when we were at the last
truck stop and she ripped
the Twinkie out of my hand.
- She admires your independence.
Me on the other hand she
considers to be a very bad boy.
- Yeah.
- You see you're forgetting our
deal.
- Oh the land transfer deal.
The contracts are right over
there.
- No our other deal.
[laughing]
- You know I think that Morris
forgot to pack that file.
- Whoa whoa whoa wait wait wait.
How do you think your firm got
this gig in the first place?
- Because I'm a really hard
worker with an eye for fairness.
[laughing]
- Guess again.
- Because I'm a ruthless cow
who's willing to sleep her way
into the big leagues.
- Look you get what you want.
I get what I want.
- You really think that's
what it takes to get ahead?
- Yeah, it helps.
It's that guy isn't it?
Who the hell is he anyway?
- He's a really great architect.
He's an old friend.
Small time land developer.
- Are you trying to screw
me out of this land deal?
Because if you are--
- Believe me I have no
interest in your land deal
and your inheritance.
None.
- You mean, you won't sleep
with me
just because I'm rich and
powerful?
- I would never sleep with
someone to get ahead, okay?
- I finally found a woman
who likes me for me.
Oh Sophie, oh Sophie.
- Just hold that thought for
one minute.
Hello, is this the Bay Ridge
Mall?
I have a bit of an emergency.
I need to know what time the
mall closes.
Or at least the Santa station.
Okay, thank you very much.
[phone beeps]
[ominous music]
Please don't hit me.
- How dare you suggest that
we call off this wedding?
- Listen I know how
this looks, and trust me
you don't want to know
the real reason I'm here
any more than the lie
I'm about to tell you,
so why don't you just
give me a few minutes
to talk with him alone.
- Just stay away from my fiance.
If I catch you within two
feet of us while we are here,
I am getting a restraining
order.
[ominous music]
I was thinking with the
snow capped mountains
in the background, the
patio would be perfect
for our wedding photos.
And this room could be a
fantastic place to have
an intimate dinner with
our closest friends and--
- Well this is going to be
interesting.
- Oh yes, flowers, we need
flowers...
- What am I doing?
I'm just stupid.
- I'm on to you dear.
- Oh?
- At first I assumed you
were simply after my nephew
but then I realized
you're too smart for him.
And so the question remains,
what is it exactly that you
want.
- Oh to close the deal
and all that corporate--
- Who is that man?
- You know what, you
wouldn't understand it.
- Trust me honey, at my
age nothing you could say
would shock me.
- My husband.
- I see.
- It's a long story.
- Stories are in the past dear.
What's to do about it now.
- Oh I don't know.
I don't even know why I'm here.
I should be at home reading
the Grinch, stuffing stockings,
resenting my in laws.
I made just a terrible mistake.
- You know, wealth
always came easy for me.
Success a snap.
But family, children, a man
that I love,
I didn't want any of that.
Wasn't possible with my career.
Heck I invented 24/7.
But you, I think there's
something else for you.
You know dear, if there is
something else or someone else
who inspires you--
- There's four other people.
But I'm afraid I might
have lost them forever.
- Unless you get that man.
- I don't know.
It's all I have to go on right
now.
- Well then go.
- But you don't understand,
I've been trying.
Oh my gosh.
- Oh stop your whining already.
Go after him before it's too
late.
- Okay.
You're right, you're right,
thank you.
Why am I so nervous.
I've known this man forever.
Keep it together Sophie, keep
it together.
Hey.
Psst.
Dave.
- Since when do you do yoga?
- Since when do you wear
a matching track suit?
- It was a gift.
- I'm sorry I'm just used
to seeing you in those
funky old sweats.
- Those sweats are a classic.
- I know I just washed them.
They're sitting there unfolded
in the laundry basket.
- Shh.
- Okay.
- Look, I also know
that you just found out
that you need glasses.
[gong ringing]
I bet even in this alternate
reality
you're trying to get
your band back together.
You know, your old band?
Dave, you won't buy coffee
from Starbucks because
you think it's ridiculous
that they call a small coffee
tall.
Now look even if half of
what I say you believe,
I need you to just--
- You again.
That's it.
I'm calling security.
I am not going to let
you get away with this.
- Marcia, Marcia, wait, wait.
[gong ringing]
- Um, very relaxing class thank
you.
Ohm.
- First she took over my
business and now she's trying to
sabotage my wedding,
my kundalini, my life.
- Dave?
- Don't you take one step
closer.
- Look Marcia I know
that you're upset with me
and I can't blame you, but--
- Sophie's just an old friend
who's going through a tough
time.
- Old friend, don't
you mean old girlfriend
who you still have a thing for?
- No I--
I'm, well, I don't know, I
didn't expect any of this.
- Damn you Dave Kelly you've
had cold feet
ever since she got here the
other day.
- You have?
- Just take this okay?
Take it, take it.
- That's my ring.
- No it's my ring.
- Excuse me.
- Excuse me.
- It's my ring.
- Excuse me.
- Ah okay just--
[grunting]
[metal ring pinging]
[gasping]
[whooshing]
[splatting]
- Get out of my way!
Excuse me.
- It is not I just had it
cleaned.
- Get back.
- It's my ring and I want it.
- Would you stop.
- Where is it?
- I got it, I got it,
it's mine and you're not
getting it back from me.
- Give me the ring.
- No it's mine.
[cake splattering]
[grunting]
- I got it, I have it.
[cake splattering]
[crowd gasping]
- No, no Marcia no, no.
[grunting]
No, Sophie, Sophie, please
Sophie.
[grunting]
[cake splattering]
- Is that enough for you?
Did you want some more?
- [Dave] Marcia, Sophie, Sophie
come on.
- Where is it now?
- I don't know.
- It's gone.
And I was supposed to
be on a low carb diet.
[sighing]
Hey.
- Oh great.
- No, no please.
Come here--
- You can't be serious.
- I want to apologize.
Please, sit down.
Honestly I'm really sorry.
I didn't mean to make you hate
me.
I was kind of immature back
there.
Although you were the first
person to hit me in the face.
- I was.
- We used to be friends.
What happened to us?
- Girl plague.
You know that female
competitive thing
that kicks in somewhere between
middle school and death?
- I am sorry.
I know you think I'm
crazy and that I'm trying
to ruin your life and I would
explain my twisted rationale
but you wouldn't believe
it unless you were six
and waiting for Santa Clause.
- What is it with this time of
year?
- Brings out the worst in
everyone.
- I don't know why we do it to
ourselves
because I am tired.
- So am I.
- It's not the men in our
lives, you now.
It's that women want
to impress each other.
They just want to out
Superwoman the next person.
And you now what we really want
to do
is open a bottle of wine, sit
on a beach,
and thank god that we weren't
born in the Middle Ages.
- Yeah but the corsets were
kind of hot.
- Well.
- This is the worst Christmas
ever.
- At least you got the guy.
- Really?
- Yeah, Dave still has a thing
for you.
He confessed.
And I think you should go for
it.
It's okay.
Weirdly, very weirdly, I kinda
think that Jake Lasky's cute.
- I could so hook you up.
- Oh really?
Happy New Year Marcia.
- Thanks.
- So what is it that you do
when you're not breaking hearts?
- I'm an architect.
- Condos, shopping malls?
- No not that kind of architect.
I'm more of an idealist
than a mogul I guess.
Current project I have
is a state of the art
community center with
pools and soccer fields
and a non-profit daycare.
Kind of like a place
for parents and families
who could never afford private.
- Sounds wonderful.
- Yeah and it will be
as soon as we can find
someone to donate the land.
Quite a legacy.
- Yes.
Yes, it would be.
As my father always said,
the true measure of a man
is not about the deal in
hand, it's what he does next
that makes him great.
- Dave?
Dave, I've got to go.
- Thanks for the drink.
- Hey, come here.
I've got something to tell you.
- I've got one minute.
- Thank you so much for coming
with me.
- Well you were rushing
around and we didn't really
get the chance to talk to one
another, so.
- Yeah it was crowded.
I can't believe that Margaret
Lasky gave you all that land.
- Well she didn't give it to me,
she gave it to the kids of the
city.
What's something like that
worth?
10 million, 15?
Wow, Merry Christmas.
- Life is full of surprises.
- Yeah it is.
You know Margaret also said
that if I were to let you go
I'd be a fool.
Sophie, I don't know, I
mean 90% of this stuff
you talk about just sounds
absolutely ridiculous.
But then you describe that life
and it sounds pretty great.
- Well it's messy and it's noisy
and we never get to sleep alone.
Oh my god I forgot a
turkey, I forgot a turkey.
I need one of those that
are already thawed out
and those prosciutto things
that you love
and my Mom, and the Christmas
tree.
I wonder if you fixed the
Christmas tree.
Oh gee I have a deposition,
okay I'll wear that black wrap
dress.
- Do you know what Sophie
you have not changed
one little bit.
- What?
- Isn't this exactly why we
broke up in the first place?
You always had something on the
go.
Honestly I think you woke up
one morning and you forgot to
put me on your to do
list and that was that.
How much time do you have to
figure out
this magical curse thing?
- Oh god, just a few minutes.
- I don't know whether to kiss
you or have you committed.
- Maybe both.
Okay.
Here's the mall.
Wish me luck.
Okay.
- [Dave] Okay.
- This is it.
- Sophie I really hope you
find what you're looking for.
- Yeah me too, I--
Wait!
[joyful Christmas music]
[gasping]
Oh my god I'm still here.
That was supposed to be a magic
kiss.
I did everything you told me to
do.
I went back to the beginning
and the beginning is Dave
and I'm still here.
Oh god.
- Sophie what are you doing?
- Don't you see it didn't work.
I have to go back and
find that stupid Santa.
- No, no isn't it enough
that I'm willing to
go through this with you again.
I mean come on you don't have
to go on
with this charade, okay.
You won, you got me.
I'm yours.
So enough with the fairy tales.
- It's not a fairy tale Dave.
It's my life, it's your
life, it's our kids' life.
- Sophie, please don't go in
there.
Stay with me please.
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Let me in, let me in please!
Oh god, I have to try.
I know there's a back door.
Dave, wait for me.
Santa!
Santa please, Santa!
Santa!
Oh god.
Santa.
No.
No, no.
[sobbing]
- So I got you the tree
and presents for children,
whoever they are.
- Thank you Sylvia, no really,
than you.
- You owe me 78 bucks and
I want time and a half
for working Christmas Eve.
- Wow, that's fair, you deserve
that.
And something a lot more.
Here.
- I have keys.
- No, for the house.
I want you to have it.
- You going to take pills or
put your head in the oven?
- No I'm not.
- I'll be out tomorrow.
I want you to have it.
It's not really my style.
- I know.
[sighing]
[melancholy music]
- Aw.
[bells chiming]
- You're busy later, right Mom?
But it's for school.
You're busy later, right Mom?
Maybe I should have asked for
a Mom who cares about my life.
- Oh Nikki.
Oh I forgot your play.
- How you holdin' up?
- My whole life I've been so
worried
about accomplishing everything,
you know,
being the best, being in charge,
being right.
I've been so wrapped up in my
own race to I don't know where
I'm missing the stuff that
matters along the way.
The things I should
have taken time to enjoy
like kissing my husband
and really listening to Anna
sing.
Those little morning snuggles
with JJ
and little Nikki, that play
was so important to her
and she was too proud to tell
me.
Oh, how could I let it happen?
How could I get so busy
that I'm actually missing my
own life?
I thought I wasn't doing enough,
but Dave had me all figured out.
My problem has always been
trying to do too much.
- Balance is important.
- Yeah it is.
But it's too late now, huh?
[melancholy music]
What?
- Well you see I just got back
from a quick run to Vegas.
This librarian who had a thing
for the Cirque du Soleil,
you know the dirty one?
You think I'm giving up this
easy on my Ma's meatballs?
I'm still running on Vegas
time, so this watch says
we still got 10 minutes
to get you back home.
[gasping]
What do you want for Christmas,
Sophie?
[bells ringing]
- All I want for
Christmas is my life back.
[ethereal music]
I'm home.
[gasping]
I'm home.
Is anybody here?
I'm up.
- Mom's awake, Mom's awake!
- Honey, you have no idea
how glad I am to see you.
- We got a puppy from Santa.
Mom did you see our new puppy?
[puppy barking]
His name's Joey Ramone.
Joey, come on.
- Joey Ramone?
- Joey!
[laughing]
- He's so cute.
Honey where's Daddy?
- He's in the kitchen.
- Lets go.
[child laughing]
Honey!
- What are you doing up?
You are supposed to be resting.
You had a fever of 103.
- Oh my god how long was I out?
- A few days.
The doctor said it was acute
exhaustion.
- Wait, wait, what about
the presents and the food
and is my mother here--
- Just don't worry about it.
We're doing a pot luck, we've
got everything under control.
Your sister's going to
bring those yams with the
disgusting little marshmallow
things.
So listen, hey hey hey.
Go back to bed.
I've got, I'm in charge, so go
on you little control freak.
- Oh my gosh go!
- No no no no no.
- Hey honey.
- Hi Mom, are you feeling
better?
- Yeah I am.
Look I'm really sorry
about missing your play.
- It's okay.
It was just some stupid drama
class thing.
- No it wasn't.
It was important and I
should have been there.
- It's okay Mom, really.
- Look, things are going to
be different from now on.
I promise.
I'm still going to forget a few
things
and I'm going to need your help
with that
but I'm going to try
to just, I don't know,
just be here with you and
not wish my life away.
- Mom, you are here.
- Yeah, I am.
- Okay who wants crispy
pancakes?
- Why do they smell like
meatballs?
Mom, do you smell meatballs?
- Yeah I smell meatballs.
- Mom, promise me you're not
going to be
one of those parents who quits
their job to stay at home
and then spends all their
time bugging their kids.
- I promise.
- No no no don't.
My 50 million dollar deal.
Margaret Lasky just gave that
land away.
- Well, take this up the
mountain Bob.
- Resignation?
[upbeat music]
- So how did Bob react?
- It was magnificent.
- I'm looking slimmer
these days don't you think?
- So who's our first client?
- Margareta DeSouza, some
big time real estate mogul.
[upbeat Christmas music]