Terror in the Aisles (1984) - full transcript

Donald Pleasance and Nancy Allen take us through some of Hollywood's most terrifying moments in horror history in this anthology, which features many of the finest science fiction, crime drama and horror films of the 1930s through 1980s. Included are Night of the Living Dead (1968), Psycho (1960), Rosemary's Baby (1968), The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974), Jaws (1975), Jaws 2 (1978), The Fog (1980), Halloween (1978) and Halloween II (1981), as well as countless others. Blood and gore abound making this movie not very much for the squeamish.

Hello?

Robert, I don't think
this is very funny.

Bobby?

Who is this?

As you watch the screen,

your heart begins
to beat faster.

There's a fluttering
in the pit of your stomach.

Your throat is dry.

Your palms damp.

Suddenly, a chill
runs down your spine.

You clutch the
person next to you.



You tell yourself,
"It's only a movie."

It's only a movie.

But sooner or later,
it's time to go home.

Hello?

Who's there?

There's no
question about it.

Some terror films go too far.

Tommy,
unlock the door.

But so do the audiences.

I want you to go down the stairs and out the front door.

I want you to go down the street to the MacKensie's house...

First they start
grabbing each other,

which is all very well,
if you have a date.

I want you to tell them to call the police.
Hey!



And before long...

Now, do you understand me?
No. No, baby, no, no. No!

...people are yelling at the
characters on the screen.

- Hey, watch out, baby!
- Watch out!

Please stop.

Do something!

Get him!

Don't drop the
knife, you asshole!

- Hey, get out of that room!
- Babies.

It's strange,
isn't it?

In real life, nobody likes to think about violence, pain,
blood and death.

The bogeyman.

But project these experiences on a screen,
and people form lines in the street.

That's because a terror film is a lot like a roller coaster ride.

Only, you're sitting in a theater,
which is relatively safe.

Did you see that?
Yes.

Maybe, deep down,
we have a need to be scared.

Why else do we go
to these movies?

Perhaps we're taking a dare,

proving to ourselves
that we're not afraid.

Go ahead, Lonnie.
Chicken.

Go in!

Hey!

Hey, Lonnie,

get your ass away from there.

Besides,
there's something delicious about fear.

Especially somebody else's.

Scary movies tap
into your childhood fears

of the dark,

and of being alone.

Young or old,
we go to the movies

to see our dreams and
fantasies come to life.

But not all of our fantasies
are wholesome and dignified.

In the privacy
of our thoughts,

we can be as
childish as we like.

And the little scenarios of power and revenge we conjure up,

can be quite satisfying.

Creepy Carrie!
Creepy Carrie!

Resorting to violence
to get back at someone

might not be your cup of tea.

Will you look at that
fellow over there?

I mean,
I have never seen anything so disgusting in all my life.

But I'll bet
you've thought about it.

He's staring.

I think he's looking at us.

I think we're being picked up.

It's too awful.

Can you believe it?

On how they can let creatures like that in here.

I mean, really...

Anne, what's
the matter? Anne?

Help, someone, please!

Please help!

We all carry around a certain amount of resentment and rage

because we can't let it out.

In the movies, we can.

The question is,
why make up horrible things

when there is so much
real terror in the world?

Perhaps we invent
artificial horrors

to help us cope
with the real ones.

In 1974,
a picture came out that was inspired by a true story.

It was called
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre,

and in it,
the character of Leatherface was based on Ed Gein,

a mass murderer and grave robber who lived in a small,
isolated town.

Gein was a cannibal,

a necrophile,

and a transvestite.

But he didn't dress up
in women's clothes.

He dressed up in their skin.

No wonder these films
give us nightmares.

Do I have to close my eyes?
It doesn't matter.

Yes, I have something.
All right.

Or is it our nightmares

that give us these films?

Hey, how'd they do that?

That's the trick, isn't it?

Once the lights go down.

Whatever you see,

whatever you can't see,

whatever you think you see,

is out of your control.

You're at the mercy
of the filmmakers.

Jonesy!

Hey. Hey, Jonesy.

That's a good kitty.

That's it.

Hey. I'm not gonna hurt you.

When the camera takes on the point of view of the killer,

we see what they see,

not who they are.

Michael!

Mrs. Bates.

Of course,
you can always close your eyes,

but you can't close your ears.

And yet,

keeping your eyes
open is a good idea,

especially if you're out
on a night with a full moon,

because you never know
what's in store for you.

Years ago,
when filmmakers wanted to transform someone into a werewolf,

the actor just sat still and trick photography did all the work.

Today, people are
more sophisticated.

And becoming a werewolf
can take a lot out of you.

Help me! God!

Combining skill,

ingenuity,

and a strong stomach.

All right.

I'm gonna suck your brain dry.

Artists and technicians
continue to defy logic,

stagger the imagination,

and astound our senses.

All the time raising the stakes.

But special effects are not essential to a good movie.

It's the filmmaker's
technique that matters most.

And the unquestioned master
was Alfred Hitchcock.

You've just
won a Kewpie doll.

Why, he's broken the thing.

Ls your name Miriam?
Why, yes. How did you...

When I say that I'm not interested in content,

it would be the
same as a painter

worrying about whether
the apples that he's painting,

whether they're sweet or sour.

Who cares?

It's his style,
his manner of painting them.

That's where the
emotion comes from.

No!

This scene
is 45 seconds long,

but was made up out
of 78 pieces of film

coming onto the screen
in great rapidity.

But the overall impression
given the audience,

is one of an alarming,

devastating murder scene.

The fact is,

from the moment you
buy that ticket,

you know you're gonna get it.

It's just a question of how,

where,

and when.

The name of the
game is suspense.

Cute, Bob. Real cute.

See anything you like?

What's the matter?
Can't I get your ghost, Bob?

All right, all right,
come on. Where's my beer?

In effect, the filmmaker says to the audience, "Now,
get ready.

"You're going to see something
that's going to scare you.

"But I'm not going
to tell you when."

You're being programmed to go nuts.

I met this six-year-old child

with this blank, pale,
emotionless face

and the blackest eyes,

the devil's eyes.

I spent eight years
trying to reach him,

and then another seven
trying to keep him locked up.

Because I realized that what was living behind that boy's eyes

was purely and simply evil.

Well, can't you answer me?

Okay, don't answer me.

Boy, are you weird.

Well, I'm gonna call Laurie.

I wanna know where Paul and Annie are.
This is going nowhere.

Finally.

Hello.

Hello?

All right, Annie. First I get your famous chewing,
now I get your famous squealing?

Are you fooling around again?

Annie?

The essential fact is,
to get real suspense,

you must let the audience have information.

Now let's take the old fashioned "bomb theory."

You and I are sitting, talking,
we'll say about baseball.

We're talking for five minutes.

Suddenly, a bomb goes off,

and the audience have a 10 second terrible shock.

Now, let's take
the same situation,

tell the audience
at the beginning

that under the table,
and show it to them, there's a bomb,

and it's gonna go
off in five minutes.

And we talk baseball.
What are the audience doing?

They're saying, "Don't talk about baseball,
there's a bomb under there."

Get rid of it.

But they're helpless.
They can't jump out of their seats

up onto the screen

and grab hold of the
bomb and throw it out.

Mercy.

Look at the gas.
That man's lighting a cigar.

Hey you, stop that!
Don't drop that match!

Mister, watch out!
Get away from that car!

Get out of there!
That's gasoline!

Mister, run!
Watch out!

Mister!
Look out! Look out!

Watch out!

Shock and surprise are very different from suspense.

If you want to shock people,
you just have to catch them off guard,

and then clobber them.

Oh, my God!

No, no, no!
Don't touch it!

Don't touch it!

That was shocking, wasn't it?

But suspense can
be equally brutal.

Jesus!

Eddie, swim! Swim fast!
There's a shark, Eddie!

Swim!

Oh, God, Eddie, swim!

Swim faster! Hurry!

Come on! Swim!

Come on, swim!

Hurry, Eddie, it's a shark!

Eddie, hurry! Faster!
Come on, swim!

Hurry! Hurry, Eddie!

Eddie!

Oh, God!

Eddie?

Terror owes
its very existence...

Stick them up!

...to the one group of characters devoted to its cause.

The villains.

From the dangerously disturbed...

Vengeance is mine,
sayeth the Lord.

...to the thoroughly demented.

They run the gamut in age,

appearance,

even occupation.

Give me the money, you fucker.

And yet...

I'm not a bad man.

...they can be encouraging.

All I want is for
you to trust me.

Come on, baby.
Open up the door.

You gonna hit me again?

Now you know you're the
number one thing in my heart.

They can be disarming.

Come on, baby. Open up the door.
I'm out here all alone.

I'm gonna have her make
a daily drink for you,

that'll be fresher,
safer and more vitamin rich than any pills on the market.

They can be reassuring.

Any questions you have,
call me, night or day.

That's what I'm here for.

You may even
be married to one.

Wendy, I'm home.

So that even when you're certain of who they really are,

there's still no guarantee that you're safe.

I know who you are,
you murderer!

I know who you are!

Help! The man
needs help here!

Help! Quick!

A doctor!

At times we can't help but marvel at their cleverness.

You swear you ain't
gonna hit me again?

I ain't never gonna hit you.

All I wanna do is give you
the kind of love you want.

What you need.

That's right.

Come on, open the door.

I cannot believe
how stupid you are.

Slick and calculating.

When it comes to cruelty,
they seem so self assured.

And you? What's
your favorite toy?

Geraldine.

What does she do?

And may we have Geraldine on the table, too?

No, we may not.

Why the hell not?

Because she's the referee.

The most compelling villains are often the most confident.

May I help you with anything?

Yes, yes. Something special.

Yes.
I think you might be interested in something like this.

Mmm. That's good.
What is it?

I think you'd be interested in this more, sir.
Would you like to smell it?

What do you think?

Could you wrap it up for me?

Certainly.
I'll be back in a couple of minutes.

All right.

You really are very pretty.

Well, thank you.

For each villain brings a style and a method to his madness.

United Press.

I have an announcement to make
for your international wire.

Real name
is Heymar Reinhardt.

He has no network,
no real organization. He improvises.

He manages to succeed
where others have failed.

If he has changed his face,

he will be more
dangerous than ever.

Is this trip business
or pleasure?

Pleasure, I hope.

Nobody ever walks out on me.

You understand me? Never!

They never walk out on me.

Untroubled by conscience,
their capacity for evil has no limit.

Lesson number one, Ginger.

Is it safe?

Are you talking to me?

Is it safe?

Is what safe?

Some are capable
of doing anything.

Is it safe?

I don't know what you mean.

Hey, asshole!

Get out of the way! Move!

You got him?

Scream!

Shoot!

He's not clear.

You're gonna pay for
what you did to Ginger.

What I did with Ginger
is knock her around.

So what, bitch?

That's enough. That's enough.
You fucking asshole! She's dead!

She's dead?

Yeah! Suck my dick, you son of a fucking...
You set me up, huh?

Nobody sets me up.
You understand?

Nobody!

Come on, shoot!

Come on, cop, shoot!
No, no!

Come on, kill me!

She's dead, fuckhead!

Dead!
No!

You understand me? Dead!
No!

Dead! Come on, shoot!
Come on! Come on!

You understand me?

Leave us alone.
We've done nothing.

You must be very proud.
You will come over...

No, you take me!

What is it? What is happening?

Life, Mr. Marigny.

No! It's not!

He's just taken a woman.
He's bringing her to the front of the tram car.

He has her against the window.

What the
hell is he doing?

Get a little closer.
I just want to see his face.

This one's for you, DASILVA.

Christ, don't do it.

And Susy...
Yes, Mike?

I want you to know...

Mike!

In the end,
they simply don't distinguish between right and wrong.

Perhaps they don't
know the difference.

Perhaps they just don't care.

Whether they are ruthless,

desperate...

What I did to Ginger,
it ain't nothing to what I'm gonna do to you.

...or totally deranged.

Fuck!

However unstable the villains...

Why'd you kill the woman?

I wanted to.

So why don't you kill me?

In due time.

...they are the ultimate
figures in power.

That hurt? No.

I should think it would.

You should take better
care of your teeth.

You have quite a cavity here.

Is it safe?

Look, I told you, I can't...

So no matter how much
they make us hate them,

they know how to make
us watch them.

I'll find you, bitch!

Please...

Please stop.

Please don't worry.
I'm not going into that cavity again.

That nerve's already dying.

A live, freshly-cut nerve
is infinitely more sensitive.

So I'll just drill into a healthy tooth until I reach the pulp.

Unless, of course,
you can tell me that it's safe.

Wulfgar!

Freeze! Hold it, motherfucker!

Son of a bitch!
I'm coming right behind you.

Watch out by the window.

Life can be that simple.

Relief, discomfort.

Now, which of these I next apply,
that decision is in your hands.

So, take your time

and tell me, is it safe?

We are
all born helpless.

As infants,
we're dependent on others for food,

shelter, for life itself.

We're totally vulnerable.

Slowly but surely,
we learn to be afraid.

Michael, did you
hear your father?

Out of the water now! Now!

We're taught the difference between right and wrong.

And yet, we're only human,

and we sometimes
take foolish risks.

Even when we
know it's dangerous.

By the time we regret
what we've done,

it may already be too late.

Get down! Get down!

But what's most
frightening of all...

Bobby!

Have you
checked the children?

What?

...is that for reasons beyond our control,

for reasons beyond
our comprehension,

or worst of all, for
no reason whatsoever...

The hat.

I want the hat.

...at anytime,

at anyplace,

we may find ourselves...

...a victim.

What are you?
Some kind of asshole?

Since vulnerability is the key,
the victim is usually

alone.

Hello?

Why haven't you
checked the children?

And unfortunately, in these movies,
the victim is almost always a woman.

It's a man. I think
he's trying to scare me.

An anonymous caller, ma'am?

That's right.

It's probably just some weirdo.
The city's full of them.

Wendy, let me explain
something to you.

Whenever you come in here and interrupt me,
you're breaking my concentration.

You're distracting me.

And it will then take me time
to get back to where I was.

Understand?

Yeah.

Now, we're gonna
make a new rule.

Whenever I'm in here,
and you hear me typing,

or whether you
don't hear me typing,

or whatever the fuck
you hear me doing in here,

when I'm in here,
that means that I am working.

That means don't come in.
Now do you think you can handle that?

Yeah.

What's wrong with the phones?

Nothing for you to worry about.

Just get some rest right now.

I'll let you know as soon as
we get a hold of your parents.

To make things worse,

she may be fully
aware of the danger,

but helpless to do
anything about it.

I need you here.
Here at the house.

Giving the villains an edge they're only too willing to exploit.

You've got to come over right away.
Please, before she comes back.

On the other hand,
she may be totally unaware

that she is in
any danger at all.

I have a telegram
for Dr. Potter.

Well, he's not in.
I'll take it.

I may only give it to him.

Well, I'm his wife.
I think you could give it to me.

When will he return?
I don't know.

Sometime this afternoon.
Do you wanna come back later?

You can rest assured I will.

Well,

I'm very confused.

I just need a chance
to think things over.

You've had your whole fucking
life to think things over!

What good's a few minutes
more going to do you now?

Stay away from me! Please!

Don't hurt me!

I'm not gonna hurt you.

Stay away from me!

Wendy...
Stay away!

...darling. Light of my life.

I'm not gonna hurt you.

You didn't let me
finish my sentence.

I said, "I'm not
going to hurt you."

I'm just going to
bash your brains in.

You really scared me.

If that's what you wanted.

Is that what you wanted?

No.

What do you want?

Your blood...

...all over me.

Laurie! Laurie, wait!

Wait, Laurie!

Little pigs, little pigs,
let me come in.

Not by the hair on your
chinny, chin-chin?

Then I'll huff, and I'll puff,

and I'll blow your house in!

Please, can't you help me?
I'm all alone here.

Okay. Now take it easy.

I'll tell you what.
If this guy calls you again...

He will call again!
I know he will!

All right. Now calm down.

Look, I can alert
the phone company,

so that if he calls again
we can try to trace the call.

Jack! Please!

Help!

Please!

Help! Help!

Leave me alone!

Jill, this is Sergeant
Sacker! Listen to me!

We've traced the call.
It's coming from inside the house.

A squad car's on the way
over there right now.

Just get out of that house!

Here's Johnny!

Michael, stop!

Danny. I can't get out!

Run!

Run and hide!

Come out, come out,
wherever you are.

It's time, Michael.

You don't have to be looking for trouble to find it.

I have seen
these flowers all over.

They're growing like parasites on other plants.
All of a sudden.

Where are they coming from?
Outer space?

What are you talking about?
A space flower?

Well, why not a space flower?
Why do we always expect metal ships?

Evil can
come from anywhere.

Arriving mysteriously
from outer space,

or appearing suddenly
here on Earth.

There's a fog bank out there.

On land or at sea.

Environments once familiar,

even pleasurable,

become bewildering,

and ominous...

...concealing and
protecting the enemy.

I wanna see who it is.
No.

Can't I stay for two more seconds?
Go to your room.

While leaving us...

Okay, okay. I'm going.

...exposed.

Oh, God!

But of course, nature
is not always to blame.

I don't know what
the hell's in there,

but it's weird and pissed off,
whatever it is.

Malevolent life forms from other worlds may jeopardize our position

as the supreme
beings on this planet.

You see what
we're talking about here

is an organism that
imitates other life forms,

and it imitates them perfectly.

When this thing attacked our dogs it tried to digest them,
absorb them,

and in the process,
shape its own cells to imitate them.

That's not dog, its imitation.

We got to it before
it had time to finish.

Finish what?

See.

Jack.

Jack!

I'll get the police.
- Elizabeth, wake up.

They get you when
you sleep. Sit up!

Wait right there, Mr.
Bennell. How do you know my name?

Hang up, Matthew.

I didn't tell you my name!
Hang up.

I didn't tell them my name!
They're all a part of it.

They're all pods, all of them.

It's happening now.

They grow out of those pods.

How do we fight
what we don't understand?

How can we triumph
over the unknown?

Evil doesn't have to come
from another world

to control life here on Earth.

Our oldest fear,

the devil himself,
can take on any form.

Even that of a child.

Have no fear, little one.

I am here to protect thee.

Damien!

Damien!

Damien, look at me.

Look at me, Damien.

It's all for you.

All right then,
Regan, let's see...

Regan!

Keep away! The sow is mine!

Fuck me! Fuck me!

Please, come in.

More frightening, still,
are those who worship the power of evil.

That whole bunch.

The parties with the singing and the flute and the chanting,

those are esbats.
They're Sabbaths... Honey, don't get excited.

Read what they do, Guy.
They use blood in their rituals.

And the blood that has the most power is baby's blood.

And they don't just use the blood,
they use the flesh, too.

Rosemary, for God's sakes!

They're not setting foot
in this apartment ever again.

And they're not coming
within 50 feet of the baby.

They're old people.
They have a bunch of old friends!

Dr. Shand happens
to play the recorder!

I'm not taking any chances
with the baby's safety.

Well, you're not going.

I already said I would.

You tell that boy you're not going or we're gonna move from here!

No.

We'll move from here and you'll never see that boy again.

The potential for evil may be hidden within all of us.

Most of us never discover it.

Please sit and talk to me!

Some of us do.

I'm going, Mama.

And you can't stop me.

And I don't wanna
talk about it anymore.

Who are we?

Are you comfortable, Regan? Yes.

How old are you?

Twelve.

Is there someone inside you?

Sometimes.

Somebody in this camp
ain't what he appears to be.

Right now, that may
be one or two of us.

By spring,
it could be all of us.

So how do we know who's human?

If I was an imitation,
a perfect imitation,

how would you know
if it was really me?

I'm speaking to the person
inside of Regan now.

If you are there, you too are hypnotized,
and must answer all my questions.

Come forward and answer me now.

What is inside us?

And what if that, which we held back,
suddenly were let go?

Chris!

Mrs. MacNeil.

You got to be fucking kidding.

I cast you out!

This servant of God.

It is he who commands you!

He who flung you from the heights of Heaven to the depths of hell!

This is not a human child.
Make no mistake.

What have you done to it?

What have you done to its eyes?

He has his father's eyes.

What are you talking about?
Guy's eyes are normal.

What have you done
to him, you maniacs?

Satan is his father, not Guy.

Oh, God!

No! Please, Daddy, no!

No, Daddy. No!
God, help me!

God is dead! Satan lives!
- Hail, Satan!

In a world where
evil plays without rules,

no one is beyond reach.

Amen.

It's no longer a question... NANCY: Matthew?

...of what's to become of us.

Matthew.

You son of a bitch!

Take me! Come into me!

But rather, what
we're to become.

God damn you! Take me!

No!

Now what's the one thing these films have in common?

My only comment
would be highly censor-able.

People in trouble.

And what's the easiest
way to get into trouble?

Give up, John.
Admit who you are.

You know as well as I do,
this necklace is imitation.

Sex.

She loves me man.

And it always has been.

Even in this light,
I can tell where your eyes are looking.

Ever had a better offer
in your whole life?

Even in real life,
sex has its dangers.

I shouldn't have been so rude.
Thank you for picking up...

Because it makes
people take chances.

But usually, they survive.

In a terror film,
you don't even have to take a chance.

Just take a walk alone at night,

and that may be the
last we see of you.

A moonlight swim in the nude

is definitely a bad idea.

Max!

In the bedroom,
anything can happen.

Nicki, don't.

Now, we take Master Charge, Visa,
American Express, but not for tips.

Heaven help you if sex
is your profession.

Okay, that's not really true,
you can put tips on Visa if you want.

These films will put
an end to your career,

permanently.

Oh, my God!

My angel. My angel.

He orders me to strip.

I do it.

Keeping one eye on the razor.

He drops his pants.

He forces me down on my stomach.

Kneels down behind me
and rests the cold blade...

In terror films,
sex rarely ends with pleasure.

It ends in violence.

Now, I'm gonna take my
hand off your mouth.

If you scream...

Bam!

Now let's try it.

That's good. That's real good.

Come on, take it, baby.
Don't be modest.

And since you're never more
vulnerable than when you're naked,

the bathroom is the most
dangerous place of all.

Well, that's
what you all do.

You make a man think
that he's accepted.

It's all just a great
big game to you.

Well, what do you think?

I'm sure it comes as no great surprise to you when I say that

there are little
corners in everyone,

which were better
off left alone.

Hello! Hello?
I watched you today.

What?

But that's your stock in trade,
isn't it, a man's weakness?

Little sicknesses,
which should never be exposed.

Would you mind not doing that?

And I was never really
fully aware of mine

until you brought them out.

I have no idea what
I'm going to do,

and I'm so deeply puzzled.

I've done terrible things.
I've killed three people.

But yet, I don't consider
myself a terrible man.

No more than...

...than others.

I know you're expecting some
kind of extravagant behavior.

So it doesn't make any difference what I do anymore,
does it?

I will not harm
you at all physically.

Why don't you...

Why don't you make yourself
comfortable. Why don't you...

I am perfectly comfortable.
Just put your head down.

You have such lovely
long blonde hair.

Turn your head. Like that.

Don't! Don't!

Now!

God damn you, bitch!

In the beginning,
horror films were dominated by the classic figures.

Frankenstein, Dracula,

and The Wolf Man.

But as the years passed...

The bride of Frankenstein.

...they began to lose
their shock value.

And found themselves being used to create the opposite effect.

We're going up to that castle.

What about that woman?
She's only trying to scare us.

Well, she's doing a very good job of it.
Yeah, come on.

No, no. Please don't wear that.
What's the matter?

I know you think I'm crazy,
but in half an hour the moon will rise

and I'll turn into a wolf.

You and 20 million other guys.

As horror and comedy
became more intertwined,

it was hard to know
how to react.

Or how to feel...

Yeah, operator,
get me the County Sheriff's Department, quick!

Never sing my music again.

Not here, not anywhere.

Do you understand?
Never again.

My music is for Phoenix.
Only she can sing it.

Anyone else that tries, dies!

You wouldn't be able to do
these awful things to me

if I weren't still
in this chair.

But you are, Blanche!
You are in that chair!

Wow!
- What are you kids watching?

The news lady's turned
into a werewolf.

Put me down.

Billy, get the hell out of here!

It's only a movie.

But sooner or later,

you must leave the theater

and go home.

Perhaps alone.

You can't get away!

I'm right behind you!