Surprise Me! (2017) - full transcript

What if pain was merely a set up for the ultimate surprise party? Genie Burns, owner of Surprise Enterprise, masterminds off the wall surprise parties in nobody would-suspect-it locations. ...

(Upbeat music)

♪ There's no room for anything but love ♪

♪ There's no room for anything but love ♪

♪ In this crazy world ♪

♪ In this crazy world ♪

♪ There's no place for
anything but faith ♪

♪ There's no place for
anything but faith ♪

- [Genie] What?

- Where are you?

- Stupid car stalled and so now--

- Don't care just tell
me what your wearing.

I need to tell the Finches
so they'll recognize you.

- My blue dress.

It's the same one that I
wore to the Garfield party.

- Oh God.

- It's Chanel.

- It's a Chanel wannabe
and she's gonna know.

- Even if she did, it means nothing.

- It means that you are
not successful enough

to be selling at this level.

- First of all, she's not gonna know

and second of all, I'm
successful and I wear it

so why wouldn't somebody else?

Stop being so paranoid.

We are fine.

- We better be because if
your little plan goes south,

we're at Costco eating crow in bulk.

- Okay, well I'm not worried.

- You got two minutes to sell it.

- Mister and Missus Finch?

- Yes.

- Hi, Genie Burns.

What a pleasure to meet you.

- [Mister Finch] Genie,
it's a pleasure meeting you.

- Let's take a look at this
empty nester's dream, shall we?

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

- Oh.

- Isn't this lovely?

- This is special.

- So the architect who designed
this unit had a vision.

There's actually a term
for it called procession.

- What?

Like a funeral?

- Uh, no.

More like a surprise.

But you don't see it until you
move through the floor plan.

And then it just affects
you so deeply that you--

- That you buy it?

- No, frankly, I'm not interested

in big surprises in real estate.

- No, I was gonna say connect to it.

- Ah.

He wants you to feel like
you're a part of the design.

- Well if there's any
lavender up there, I'm home.

- Ready for the debut of a lifetime?

- Yes.

- [All] Surprise!

♪ And we all come together ♪

♪ And we all come together in love ♪

- How could we not take this place?

♪ And we all come together in love ♪

- Genie, how did you convince my owners

to allow this craziness?

- I told them I might lead to a sale.

- Oh, really?

Isn't that a bit presumptuous
for a party planner?

- Excuse me, I'm so sorry to interrupt.

We just wanted to come over

and say thank you so much for this party.

- You've made our
grandparents really happy.

- Oh that makes me so happy to hear.

Thank you.

- I mean it was a little weird

with all the questions you were asking.

- Right, like what does
a condo search have to do

with a surprise party?

- [Woman] And the sofa goes right here.

- Oh.

- So Maggie gets the commission
on a condo that I sold

and calls me presumptuous.

I mean how rude.

Stupid AC is not working and it's so hot.

- Take.

Take the rest of the afternoon off

and buy yourself a new car.

- I'll look but I don't have enough saved

after the down payment yet.

- You make good money.

Where is it?

- In my apartment.

My bedding alone is amazing.

Right, I spend way more time
in my bed than I do in my car.

- And what a coincidence they both

have empty passenger
sides, which reminds me.

Thank you for getting
that cop friend of yours

to break up that party last night.

I finally got to sleep.

How do you even know him?

- Oh we went to college together.

- Mhmm.

- Hey, I'll call you later.

- Andrea, what is this
and why does it smell

like a cheap hotel bathtub?

- It's liver season, boss.

- Liver?

- It's time to cleanse our toxic burdens.

- Okay.

- You know, in all the
years we've been friends,

why have you never thrown
me a surprise party?

- You've never said you wanted one.

- Yeah but when have I
ever wanted something

without you telling me
that I needed it first?

Oh Danny, you know you gotta
make crock pot oatmeal.

It's the best.

Oh Danny, you gotta get these sheets.

They cost more than your taxes.

You're gonna love 'em.

Oh Danny, you gotta get
your teeth whitened.

Your smile looks so much better.

- I am really annoying, aren't I?

- Yes, but on the other hand,

I wake up every morning to the smell

of crock pot oatmeal and amazing sheets.

(Siren wailing)

Oh shit.

(Bright music)

- What's your hurry, sir?

- Well, see it's my
birthday and my friend here

was taking me out to
dinner for my birthday.

So, can't give a guy a ticket
on his birthday, can you?

- Sure I can.

Sir, I'm gonna need to see
your license, insurance.

- Oh right.

Okay yeah.

That's weird.

It's always here.

- Do you not have anything?

- Feel like I've been robbed or something.

- Why don't you not have your license?

- Miss, are you able to
drive your friend's car?

He needs to come down
to the station with me.

- Are you serious?

- Officer, I can vouch for him.

He's very responsible and
there's obviously an explanation

and we will definitely figure it out,

but today really is his birthday

and if you knew what I have
planned to surprise him.



- [Officer] Follow me please.

- Wait.

Am I arrested?

- [Officer] Zip it.

Let's go.


- [All] Surprise.

- [Woman] We got you.

♪ Into this world I go ♪

♪ Into this world I go ♪

♪ With a pocket full of change ♪

♪ Memories to explain ♪

(alarm ringing)

♪ Into this world I go ♪

♪ Into this world I fly ♪

- Dammit.

♪ With angels by my side ♪

♪ To fight the fears within ♪

♪ To light the fire again ♪

♪ To this world I go ♪

- Oh sorry.

Could I get a large coffee of the day,

a soy latte, and then one
of those like special drinks

with all the sugar and the big,
big one with whipped cream?

- It's overpaid, don't you think?

- It's not actually what I paid.

Thank you.

- Hi.

Can I get a medium Americano, almond milk.

Thank you.


Underpaying now, don't you think?

- They offer so I partake.

- I think they mean current drink.

Oh come on.

I just saved you from a
hanging blueberry tag.

- Burberry.

- Whatever.

- Artificial sweetener
only works in my coffee.

- Hey.

- Morning.

- Morning.

Genes, did your hair drink Andrea's tea

or is this a cry for help?

- It's called a messy bun, Steven.

- So, all you need to
do is mess up your life

and then you've got an outfit.

- Oh.

Do you remember the first
day you walked in here?

I remember thinking you were
so handsome and polished.

That I'd finally met--

- Arrived at fairytale central.

- And that we'd be forced
to fight our feelings

like all great loves do until
we finally had to give in.

- We'd get married in a glorious ceremony.

Have kids that man the phone lines.

- And then we would die one day apart.

- The town would throw a surprise funeral.

- And we would share one
casket with fluffy pillows

and a Chanel throw covering our feet.

- And then Surprise Enterprise would go

on forever surprising people worldwide.

The end.


- Do you ever look at me and wonder?

I read that 66 % of gay men end up

in heterosexual relationships.

- 100 % miserable.

- Get over yourself.

I was only kidding.

I don't chase gay men.

- [Steven] You would chase
anything that doesn't want you.

- It's always so good.

- Yeah.

- So glad you're here.

- [Girl] Oh my lemon.

- [Genie] When life rolls you a lemon.

- I don't get it.

- It's from a saying.

When something bad happens,

you squeeze something
good right out of there.

- Do you live here, too?

- I do.

- Do you babysit?

- [Woman] Okay Casey.

- I'm Genie.

I live in apartment
six and you can come by

any time you want.

- I'd like that.

- Bye.

- Bye.

- Excuse me.

Do you know what's
inside of these muffins?

- Burberries.

- Nice to see you again.

Sorry, gotta run.

- Hey.

Guess what?

- What?

- I made a reservation.

- For what?

- For dinner.

- For who?

- For us.

- What?


- Aisle seven.

Come on.

It's got great reviews.

Free parking, too.

Hop on the cart.

I'll take you over there.

You think it's funny.

I'm serious.

Yeah come on.

- I'm getting on your cart.

- You're getting on my cart.

- I'm not getting on your cart.

- I will follow you
around this grocery store

and annoy you until you get on this cart.

Come on.

You can do it.

- Okay fine.

Just to shut you up.

- Come on.

Let's go.

Coming down the home stretch.

- [Genie] Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god,

oh my god, oh my god,
oh my god, oh my god.

- Let me help you off there.

Jeff Bachmann.

- Genie Burns.

- Oh, the dinner reservation
that I promised you is served.

- Why thank you.

What do we have here?

- Not sure.

- What are you looking for?

- An onion.

- You don't like onions?

- It's part of a phobia.

- That is a weird phobia.

- Bottoms up.

So, that was terrible.

What would you say to
maybe a meal with menus?

- You know, I need to get back to my cart.

- Hop on.

I'll give you a lift.

- Well, I'd invite you
up for a nightcap but--

- Eh, it's okay.

Lunch noon Wednesday?

- Oh my god.

You do not quit, do you?

- Sky Blue Cafe.

Come on.

- Okay fine.



- Yes.

- Lunch on Wednesday.

- Sounds great.

Can't wait.

- Oh I'm sure you can't.

- Really looking forward to it.

- Trick or treat.


- So, what's my famous
stepdaughter conjuring up

at parties these days?

- I'm hardly famous.

But I did nail Danny the other night.

It was awesome.

- Danny?

How is he?

- Good.

- You know, I have never understood

why the two of you are not a couple.

He's adorable.

- You still on that splinter?

- Tinder?

No, but I am going out to lunch

with a boy that I met the other night.

- You know, I bet that we
know at least 10 couples

who started out as friends.

Oh they had trust.

They loved being together

and eventually it turned
into something more.

- Mom, please stop.

I'm not attracted to Danny that way okay.

You can't force it.

It's either there or it's not.

- Your mother fell in love with me

the first time she saw me.

Who can resist this mug, huh?

- That is so not true.

- I remember the first time you came

to pick up mom you brought me daises.

- Oh my gosh.

I forgot about that.

- I also remembered that
it made me miss daddy.

Did I say something wrong?

- [Mother] No.

- [Genie] You know I
love you a lot, right?

- Hey, kiddo, I understood it then.

I understand it today.


- It's part of the reason why I wanted

to see you guys this morning.

For some reason dad's accident

is hitting me harder this year.

Hey Mom, do you remember that costume

that dad gave me that morning?

- I don't remember a costume, no,

but aren't we past
talking about this by now?

- Aren't we ready to
talk about this by now?

- Fine.

- Oh that's right I forgot.

You never saw my costume because you went

into your bedroom and you never came out.

Why did she do that?

Why does she treat dad's
death like some event

that she can't go to and
I have to go all alone?

- Hey, Gene.

For some people, feeling
pain isn't an option.

You're stronger, honey.

You always have been.

- Trick or non fat pumpkin latte.

- Oh my god.

You look so adorable but
what is with the elephant?

- Oh no, not just an elephant.

I am the elephant in the room.


- What's in the bag?

- Oh, just leftover donut.

- Oh yeah.

- Okay, hold up.

I rent an elephant costume for 85 bucks

and you get excited about
a donut that cost 13 cents.

- It's a really good donut.

(Doorbell ringing)

That's a trick or treater.

Don't eat my crumbs.

- Oh this'll be good.

- [Casey] Trick or treat.

- Everything.

It was just so awesome.

Aunt Dottie?

- Genie.

- Crazy Aunt Dottie.

Here we go again.

- Genie, there's been a terrible accident.

Your father.

I can't.

I don't know how to tell you this.

- Tell me what?

- The plane, Genie.

It went down.

Do you understand what I'm saying?

(Soft music)

- [Casey] You said I could visit.

- Oh yeah.

No, of course you can.

Where's your grandma?

- She's not feeling well.

- Then where are your folks?

- My mom died.

That's why we moved here.

- Okay.

Well, you know what you get at this house.

You get all the candy.

How 'bout that, huh?

- Whoa.

- [Danny] Yup, there you go.

- Aren't you a little bit
too old to be an elephant?

- Yeah, I am, but see my Batman costume

was at the cleaners so.

- I have a Batman sleeping bag.

- Oh.

- And I have Batman pajamas.

- Well I am Batman so what?

- I was Batman's girlfriend.


- I still am.

- You want us to go trick
or treating with you?

- Yeah.

- Put that away elephant man.

- Okay, I'm not saying I'm Batman.

I'm just saying no one's ever seen me

and Batman in the same
place at the same time.

That's all.

- Happy Halloween.

Couldn't you have hired a normal person?

I don't even know why I agreed to this.

She's not even nice to me.

Ugh look at her.

It's like working with
a skinny stale Cheeto.

- The whipped cream coffees, the candy.

You are trying to get Andrea fat.

Is there prison time for diet slaughter?

Got you.

- So are we speed dating?

- That's the greeting I get?

- Hi there.

Are we speed dating?

- She's a friend of my sister's.

- You don't have sisters.

- How did you know that?

- I didn't.

- So, did you think
about not coming today?

- No.

- Really?

But you don't see this
going anywhere, do you?

- Correct.

- And why is that?

- Because you're a player.

Wait, let me guess what you do.

You own a nightclub.


With bottle service.

Waitresses walking around
in skimpy clothing.

Basketball players.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.


I was wrong.

Jeff Bachmann, Cosmetic Surgeon.

I'm gonna let you buy lunch.

- Don't mind if I do.

Can I get you some iced tea?

- Hate iced tea.

- Coffee?

- Stains my teeth.

- Diet Coke?

- Gives me the worse hiccups.

- You are not an easy person, are you?

- [Genie] Nope.

- But worth the trouble, right?

- I wouldn't say that.

I guess it just depends on your tolerance.

- Oh I'm very tolerant.

Well, I am lactose intolerant.

You're not milk, are you?

- You know what?

I'm out of here.

- Can you believe he
just left her like that?

- Here's my mantra.

Don't let the argument
happen to begin with.

Just give each other the
benefit of the doubt.

- Here's my mantra.

If you don't argue, you don't care.

But don't you dare leave
me in this restaurant.

- Don't you dare drive me away.

- I'm sure I will drive you away.

It's kind of what I do best.

- I'll make sure that you don't want to.

That's what I do best.

- Well thank you very much for lunch.

I had fun.

- My pleasure.

How 'bout dinner Saturday night?

- I don't think so, but I'm
sure I'll see you around.

- Really?

That's it?

You're gonna walk away
from a winning table?

- I will admit that the table is hot,

but it's too big a gamble.

I'd probably lose my shirt.

- I see that as a good thing.

- Wow.

- Hey, is that the shirt we got together?

- Yeah, Kay makes fun of
me every time I wear it.

She doesn't share our same
session with bargains.

- Oh.

What is it now, three weeks?

- Yeah.

It's going good.

She's easy, there's no drama, she's fun.

Sex is great.

- Sounds like another beginning

to an incredible relationship.

I'm gonna give it 'til
the end of the month.

- At least I have relationships.

Is there anyone you don't turn down?

- I'm just looking for
someone that offers more.

Split the usual?

- Yeah.

- Veggie egg white omelet
cooked dry with two salsas

and extra plates please.

- All right.

- And lemons.


- Oh yeah.

- All right, it'll be right out.

- Define more then.

- Like in a relationship?

Well I guess that I want the whole plate.

I want the healthy.

I want the warm comfort.

And salsa.

- Now we get to the good stuff.

- Oh my god, Danny.

Does everything have to
be about sex with you?

- Does nothing get to
be about sex with you?

- No, I just.

I wanna feel close with
somebody to have it.

- Hey, I let you order
food I don't even like.

What's closer than that?

- Oh my god.

That's not what I'm talking about.

Look, I share everything with you,

so you can be there for me,

but you don't share anything with me,

so I can't be there for you.

It's frustrating.

- I'm shallow.

What can I say?

- So you don't want to
be close to somebody?

- Don't really think about it.

- Don't you care about anyone?

- Course I care.

I care about you.

- I know you care about me,
but if you care about somebody,

how do you show them that
you're there for them?

- They'd see it.

- You're just gonna just you
standing there that shows love?

- Yeah, standing, sitting, staying.

Not leaving no matter what.

That's love.

Pass the syrup.

- No, get your own.

Get your own.
- Give it.

- No.

- Unbelievable.

- [Genie] What?

- See Me Sign still can't pay their bill.

Now they're trying to pay us in trade.

Like we'd ever advertise on a billboard.

- What if it's a subliminal message?

We make sure that people
about to be surprised

see a sign that says surprise.

- Blow it just before they get there.

- No, we start a buzz around town.

People see the word surprise
and either they ignore it

or they start to wonder.

- Let's go.

- What?


Oh my god, there's nothing on the books.

Why won't you tell me what's going on?

- You had a good idea.

- I did?



Was it the billboard?

- Yup, I particularly like it

to start a buzz in other cities.

- No.


We agreed to keeping the business local.

- That was five years ago.

We're established now.

You're holding us back.

- Surprise.

Happy belated birthday.

- Subliminal tease idea.

I like it.

- What's going on?

- Steven gave you the day off,

so I can take you for the
birthday present of the century.

- [Steven] Of the century.

- Come on.

- Oh my god, oh my god.

- Come on, come on, come on, come on.

Go, go, go, Genie.

Go, Genie.

- [Genie] This is a
really creative gift idea.

- [Lori] I knew you'd love it.

Genie, Genie.

- Keep going.

That's out.

Take it back to the center.

Well, well, well, Genie Burns.


How are you?

- I'm good.

I'm just biking around 'til I
meet up with a friend later.

- Nice.

- So you coach kids.

- Yeah.


It's so much fun.

Hey, I'm almost finished here.

Do you have a few minutes?

You wanna take a detour?

- No.

- Come on.
- No, no, no, no.

- So, my mom told my brother every day

do not play in the river and of course.

- He played in the river.

- It was so much worse.

He played on the ice and he fell in.

- Oh my god.

- Oh no, it's fine.

I saved him.

- [Genie] What, did you jump in?

- Oh heck no.

I wasn't even there.

No, no, no, no.

He was so afraid that my
mom was gonna find out,

I brought her blow dryer
down to the basement.

Helped to dry his clothes.

She never had a clue.

- [Genie] Why was he
so afraid of your mom?

Was she that strict?

- No, no, she was an alcoholic.

She could get pretty volatile, you know.

- So sorry.

- Yeah, it's okay.

- Is your mom still alive?

- No.

- And what about your dad?

- He took off with a
blonde when I was six.

- Blondes are more trouble.

- Yeah, yeah.

We'll see.

You know I've never
talked about this stuff

with anybody before?

I feel like I can be myself around you.

It's nice.

- I gotta go.

- Well, I'd ask you out
but afraid of your answer.

- Well, I am a surprise girl.

- [Danny] Oh there she is.


- Genie, Genie.


I'm Kay.

Finally we meet.

I said to Danny the other day I love

this Saturday tradition you guys have.

I want in.

Oh my god you are gorgeous.

Is she real?

Is this real lucky?
- Yeah.

- Hi.

- And here we are.

Oh man.

Well, how 'bout we ride south?

- Let's do it.

- Let's do.

He's such a goof.

I said baby, I would not be caught dead

wearing workout clothes
to a farmer's market.

What do you think I am, a cliche?

You know I'm not that.

- Yeah.

- So we were gonna go grab lunch

at our favorite little spot.

How 'bout you join us?

Oh Genie.

- Well, I would love to.

Thank you but I met this great guy

and I'm gonna get some cute
clothes for the date so.

- Precious.

Well then you should go.

- I will.

You guys have fun.

- Why don't you get going?


- Toodles.

- Just like that huh.

Just like that.

♪ I lift you up to heaven ♪

♪ Carry you down that lonesome road ♪

♪ Pick you up for coffee ♪

♪ Tell you I love you
even when we're old ♪

♪ Heard all your stories ♪

♪ About how life's got you down ♪

♪ Said your life is complicated ♪

♪ Well how can I help
you uncomplicate it now ♪

♪ My girl ♪

♪ I love you ♪

♪ I love you ♪

- [Genie] Get in here.

- So who's playing revenue tonight?

- I don't know.

Jeff bought the tickets.


- Well, I feel bad.

You know, you and Danny
always went together

and now you guys hardly even talk.

- We both found people.

I guess that pushed our
friendship to the side.

This is the first time
that I'm going to revenue

excited not just for the music
but for the romantic part.

Can't you just be happy for me?

I think I see why people fall in love.

Like I get it now.

- People, not you?

- I don't know.

I just.

I never believed that
it would happen for me.

And it hasn't so.

- So?

What's making you get it?

- I used to think that being in love

made you happy in the present,

but now I also think it
affects your history.

- What do you mean?

- Like.

Love comes in and it just
makes the past hurt less.

- Are you saying that
you're happier now with me?

- [Genie] Maybe.

- I think you just said that you love me.

- No, I did not.

Oh my god, no.

- There's a quiver.

A little quiver of love.

♪ Why can't you love me for who I am ♪

- Maybe a little twitch.

- A twitch?

Just a little twitch?

- [Genie] Just a little.

- I'll give you a twitch.

I love you.

- Does it scare you to say that?

- Not at all.

It feels nice.

You should try it.

- [Genie] I gotta go
pee so I'm just gonna.

♪ Why can't you love me ♪

♪ This is wrong to me ♪

♪ That's right y'all ♪

♪ Oh this man why do I love him ♪

♪ I just don't understand ♪

- Super dog, large
fries and a Coke please.

- Excuse me.

Do you know you just ordered
from the garbage can?

- [Man] Can I help you?

- Super dog, large
fries and a Coke please.

- [Man] Okay, you can pull around.

- Last night at the concert,
Jeff said I love you,

which made me really
happy but I don't know.

I also felt kind of scared.

And then I saw Danny cuddling with Kay

and I felt jealous, like really jealous.

The thing is that I love Jeff.

I do.

I really do.

He's deep and he's like
exactly what I need.

- [Man] $9 for the order please.

- You know the thing is with Jeff

is that I find myself
wondering when it's gonna end.

Like how it's gonna end all the time.

Like all the time.

And that can't be normal, is it?

- Get your own, woman.

- Say something.

- Let it play out.

- Really?

That's your great advice?

Let it play out.

- This coffin come with napkins?

- Yeah, it's in the backseat.

♪ Ooh yeah ♪

- What is this for?

- This is a today tomorrow necklace.

Symbolic of our present
and our future together.

Can you lift up your hair?

But honey, we really need
to work on your fears okay

because I'm gonna be traveling a lot now

and I'm gonna want you
to come and visit me.

- Thank you.

♪ Something scares me ♪

- I'm gonna go.

I'm gonna go look at it in the mirror.

(Soft music)

- Hey, I'm going to the corner of.

Randolph and Green.


- [Genie] I am not a stable person, Lor.

- And how did you find out, Genes?

Did you hack into your own phone?

- Jeff asked me to travel with him.

- And did you tell him why you don't fly?

- Yes and he said that
love motivates people

to get over that kind of stuff.

- Love motivates people to
accept the whole package.

- My package has gone up a whole size.

(Bright music)

- [Man] That stands.

This is pretty awkward here.

- You don't know what we do she asked her.

She's gonna love it.

Excuse me one minute.

What are you doing?

- I ate so much food last
night and I feel tired

and I just wanna go home and go to bed.


- Sour cream and onion?

- Cool ranch.

- A big move producer wants to hire us

to throw a surprise
wedding for his girlfriend.

His assistant's in there now.

- What?

Who is it?

- He won't tell me so he
must be really famous.

- Oh my god.

Steven, this is totally out of our league.

- Not anymore it's not.

Come on.

- What?

No, I can't do an interview like this.

Oh thanks.

Hi, I'm Genie Burns.

I'm so sorry.

I just came from this 10 year old's

eat don't sleep slumber party.

It was this big surprise.



(Vacuum humming)

- Okay.

Genie, to avoid leaks to the press,

Bill would like the guests surprised, too.

In Chicago because that's where
the bride's family is from.

- Okay.

So just so I understand everything.

You want us to plan a wedding
on a day that you choose

and then what should we call him?

- Quentin.

- So Quentin's girlfriend
will know nothing about it.

- That's right.

- And you guys think that this will result

in her marrying Quentin that day?

- We don't think.

We know.

- Well have they discussed marriage?

- Not your concern.

If any part of this wedding
should be less than perfect,

that's your concern.

- Okay well.

So I can get an idea of her taste,

is the bride traditional, eclectic?

- He wants sleek.

Over the top.

- Bill, you want
spectacular and unexpected.

That's what we do.

- Yes, but we need to have a
better understanding about her

so we can make the wedding
feel like an extension of her.

We need to know about her life, job,

hobbies, favorite colors, funny quirks.

- Your instructions
are to make it a dream.

You don't need to know anything else.

- Okay so what kind of
budget are we looking at?

- High end.

The bride's mother is
having the dress made.

It will be sent to you and
she'll have a seamstress

in the dressing room to make
last minute alterations.

When it comes, you need to try it on

and check for any flaws.

Just wash your hands please.

- While I applaud your intent,
weddings are very personal.

No two brides are the same.

So Bill, if you really wanna
make this bride feel special--

- Then Genie is the
perfect one to plan it.

The quintessential romantic.

If she loves it, so will your bride.

- God, if I was his bride,
I would dump the cake

on his big, stupid head.

- Hey now easy.

The exposure to A listers
is a game changer for us.

What else did he say?

Matching embroidered
towels for me and my pug.

- We are not wedding planners, Steven.

I am calling Randy Schuster.

- Who's that?

- Our competition.

- Not anymore.

He is the best wedding consultant
in town and we need him.

Look, our job is to set up the story.

- Okay, so my story is
that we'd all be naked

like newborn babies and then the aisle

would be her birth canal
and the bouquets would be

all of our mothers' placentas.

- And the frosting on the
cake could be breast milk.

- Oh my god you get it.

- Okay ew.

My story is to get married
where my mother can't speak.

Like under the sea in scuba gear.

Wet suit tux.

- Love it.

My dream is to have an all white wedding

with a really big cake.

Okay we have to come up with something

that will guarantee that
she wants to be there.

- And make sense in their lives.

- That's it.

Oh my god, you are a genius.

- I am.

What did I do?

- Okay, he's a producer.

So he says that he's making a movie

and the last scene is this big wedding

and he offers walk on roles
to all his friends and family.

- How do we get her to be the bride?

- On the day of Quentin says

that the lead actress' flight is delayed

and he's very upset because
he has a very tight schedule.

So he's gonna shoot the wide shot first

with extras as all the parts

and he asks her to be the bride.

- But how do we know she'll say yes?

- If she loves him as
much as he says she does,

she's gonna want him to see
her as a beautiful bride,

so he gets the idea to propose.

- True again.

- She sees herself in the
mirror when she's all made up

and she's filled with a sadness

because she wishes that
this was really her wedding

and then she approaches the aisle.

Suddenly, someone touches
her arm and whispers surprise

and it's her father.

- Stop.

- In a fog speechless,
she walks down the aisle

as faces just turn towards her

revealing all of her loved ones.

And then she looks at the altar

and there is Quentin,
the man of her dreams,

and slowly he walks towards her

and then he drops to his knees

and he asks her the question
that just minutes before

was an answered prayer and she says yes.

- Oh.

Whoa girl.

- It promotes vaginal flora.

- No self promotions in the office.

Oh my god.

- What kind of oil did
you use in that dressing?

- [Andrea] Coconut oil because
it's good for everything.

- Hey Tanya.

- Hey.

- I thought I'd bring something

to sweeten up the boring meetings today.

- What meetings?

- The staff meetings.

Isn't that why the office is closed?

- We're not closed.

It's just lunch so nobody's here.

- I must have gotten my dates confused.

Well, enjoy anyway.

I'll see you later.

- Bye.

- Hey.

- Hey.

What's up?

- I've been trying to call you all day.

- I've been busy all day.

- I stopped by earlier.

- You did?

- Yeah.

I know you didn't have
staff meetings today.

- Are you accusing me of something?

- No.

What would you think?

- I would give you the
benefit of the doubt

and I thought I had
meetings but it turns out

that they're next week.

Just been too busy to answer the phone.

That's all.

- I'm sorry.

I don't know why I just jump
to like worse case scenario.

You're right.

Been totally crazy.

- It's been yeah one of those days.

- Thank you.

All right.

Get back to work.

I'll see you later.

- I'm at it.

- All right.

(Gentle music)

I guess I just thought
that you didn't care

about me anymore so.

- Why do you even go there?

- I don't know.

I just do.

Danny, do you ever lie to Kay?

- Do I ever lie to Kay?

I mean without being specific,
I'd say yeah I guess I have.

- Do you ever lie to me?

- Okay look, here's the deal.

I gotta be honest with you.

Last week when I brought over that pizza

and I said it was gluten
free, it wasn't gluten free.

- If Kay questioned you
like she didn't trust

something that you had said,
would you get mad at her?

Would you wanna break up?

- No.

I'd probably just explain myself better.

Reassure her, you know.

- God.

I feel like being in love
sets you up not to trust

because you're so afraid of getting hurt.

- Maybe but if you're in
love with the right person,

you trust yourself enough to be in it.

- Danny, that was so deep.

- I gotta subscription to deep digest.

I get two deeps a month.


I do.

- So do you think?

Do you think that I trust
you because we're not in love

or because you're to be trusted?

- Or maybe you are in
love with me and trust me.

You just don't trust yourself.

That's it.

That's all I got.

I used up my two deeps.

That's it.

- Sorry.

(Knocking on door)

- Coming.


- Happy anniversary.

- Hey.

Let me help you out with some of that.

- Thank you.


- Game's almost over, babe.

- [Commentator] Next pitch is hit deep.

Way back to the wall.

- Get him.


- [Commentator] What a great
catch right at the wall.

Boy does he have his stuff tonight.

- Relax, you'll get some attention.

Just give me a minute.

- Attention?

How 'bout just a thank you?

- Wow.

You've only been here 30 seconds

and you're already screaming at me.

- I'm not screaming.

- You know just because I don't react

to things the way that you expect me to,

it does not give you the
right to get mad at me.

- I'm not mad.

I'm just hurt.

- Well if you can't drop it
right now, maybe you should go.

- [Commentator] He knows he
has control over this game.

A lazy swing on a curve ball results

in a ground ball to short.

The throw is made and he's out.

(Soft music)

(knocking on door)

(soft music)

(knocking on door)

Another home run.

This is now a tied game.

(Soft music)

- [Dottie] Honey, it's time to get to bed.

- When's mommy coming out?

- I'm not sure.

(Soft music)

(knocking on door)

- Have you been to this new place?

The cookie joint?

They have cookie fries.

It's genius.

- Well, it's been open
over two years, Gene.

- [Genie] Oh my god, is that
your mom's mac and cheese?

Oh, can I have some?

- [Lori] Genes, what's going on?

- Mac and cheese dip.

That should go on Kraft.

They pay for ideas like this.

You know what?

- You know, a girl at work
had an eating disorder

and she found an amazing therapist.

I'll get her number.

- That was a bottle, I think.

- Genie, call her.

She's unconventional but good.

- Stop being ridiculous.

I'm fine.

I'm probably just getting my period.

- Oh that's so gross.

I can't even watch.


- You know what?

- Oh yeah.

You wanna wash all that down.

Keep on going.

All right that's impressive.

- Done.


I'll help you clean up.

- [Lori] Yeah right.

- Sorry.

- I'll go get the broom.

- I will get that.

I will get it.

- [Lori] Don't you dare eat off the floor.

- I would never eat off the floor.

Eating disorder my butt.

Eating disorder.

(Bright music)

- Good morning.

- [Genie] Morning.

- Sign in.

Have a seat.

We'll call your name soon.

- Okay.

- Genie Burns.

Genie Burns.

So tell me.

Why you here?

- Well I've been binging a lot.

- You been purging?

- No.

I work out a lot and I diet
until I lose the weight,

but then of course I sabotage myself.

- Is anything stressful going on?

- Not really.

I was kind of hoping
that you could give me

some sort of like professional diet

to help me get my eating back on track.

- Okay, Genie.

Binging is not a food problem.

It's a feelings problem.

- What feelings?

- All right.

If there was a little
girl and she was upset

and you weren't paying
any attention to her,

what would she do?

- Throw a tantrum.

- And what would calm her?

- Dunkaroos.

- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

She needs to be heard.

She needs to be acknowledged.

That's what will calm her, Genie.

Inside of big Genie is a
little, little Genie okay.

And when that little Genie
doesn't get heard, she gets upset

and she starts sending
cravings right to your belly.

And what happens when that craving hits?

What does big Genie think?

- That she's hungry?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So what does she do?

- She eats.

- Right, right, right, right, right.

And then what happens?

- Diet.

- Right, right.

What about all that great food she loves

that she can't have anymore?

What about that food?

What happens there?

- She craves it even more.

- She craves it even more.

Yeah then what happens?

- She goes on a diet.

- Can you see what's happening here?

Can you see where I'm going?

In all this calorie chaos,

what happened to that little girl?

The little girl.

What happened to her and her feelings?

- Nobody hears them.

- No one heard them.

No one heard them.

No one heard them.

- I'm sorry.

I don't understand what
we're talking about.

- Okay.

You're what did you call it?

You said you're
professional diet you're on,

it's about feeling your feelings okay.

I don't care what they are.

I don't care how shameful, how insecure,

how immature, how stupid some
of these feelings may be,

they're yours and you need to have them.

- Well, I don't have that many feelings.

- Ooh.

Ooh your binging says you
do have a lot of them.

It does.

That's what it says to me.

I can hear loud and clear.

- Well if she's the
reason I'm eating so much,

then she's a little brat and I hate her.

- Hey, hey, hey, hey.


She's not a brat.

We love that little girl.

We need to nurture her.

Just not with food okay.

What's gonna happen the next
time she sends you a craving?

- Put that little bitch on a timeout.

- For you I think twice a week.

- I have called me some Catherine

and I have booked the venue

and I got vegan food for scaredy cats.

Got it.

Let me guess.

We're about to have a
conversation about you.

- Jeff and I are supposed to go out

to dinner tonight with Danny and Kay.

The thought of her just
makes my skin crawl.

- Oh.

Well you never like Lori's boyfriends,

but you're fine going out with them.

What's so special about Kay?

Ah get it.

Special Kay.

Special like cereal.

Special Kay.



- I'm gonna cry.

- Is this everything for now?

- Yeah.

Oh you know what?

She's gonna need some lemon wedges.

- Oh yeah, please.

- So Jeff, do you do implants?

- Yes, I do.

- You know what?

Because her sister,
she is flat as a board.

I mean she is so flat you
could skip her across the pond.

- That's not true.

Okay it's a little bit true.

- Funny.

Genie never mentioned what you do.

- Really?

Oh, he's an attorney.

- A very successful one.

- Folks, sit as long as you like,

but we drop checks early
for the theater crowd,

and just in case I split it by couple.

- Isn't that funny, Jeff?

He thinks we're a couple.

- Imagine that.

- Welcome to the sound of hope.

Huh, huh?

How great is this?

This is for binging and
for weight loss, too.

I'm gonna get a patent
out on these suckers soon

and I'm gonna retire and
maybe buy myself an island

or get a little castle off
the coast or something.

I haven't decided what I wanna do

with all the money yet.

Anyway, okay so here's what we got here.

Okay, think of every
craving as a beep right.

It's like your own personal alarm system

to know that you are processing something.

You're acknowledging something.

Am I right?

- Like what?

- Oh we don't know.

We don't know.

We have to analyze all of
our feelings around food.

Whenever you're thinking about food,

trying not to eat something,

thinking about whether
you should eat something,

we have to stop.

We have to make a choice right then okay.

Do we feed it or do we feel it?

Am I right?

Okay let's say you're
halfway into a bag of chips.

You're like oh my god how did this happen?

I'm having a bag of chips.

Not again, not again.

We gotta stop and we gotta think uh oh.

What happened?

Let's go backwards.

Let's go backwards.

What happened?

Did someone say something
earlier that made me feel bad?

Am I dreading something
coming up in the future?

Am I uncomfortable in this situation?

Why do I eat more around
this friend than that friend?

Do I even like that friend?

Oh am I bored?

I'm having the best time
of my life and it's so fun.

All of these are feelings
that we're processing.

Do you get it?

- So what do I do if I'm
like actually hungry?

- Well like any responsible
adult, you feed your cravings.

Look, we try to make it something healthy,

but if you want a treat,
then you have the treat.

You know?

Deprivation only leads to binging.

- I don't know.

I mean like what if I
just love food too much?

- Do you?

You like food way too much?

Oh, what do I have here?

Would you like one of these?

- Not really.

- See, I knew it.

I knew you could say no to food.

It's just important for us to think about

when we're not eating as we do

when we're thinking
about when we are eating.

- I don't understand.

- Every moment that you're not eating

is because it's a moment
you're fully engaged in.

You don't need anything
else to be added to it.

You're comfortable where you are

and even if you're not that
comfortable, you're handling it.

You're dealing with life upfront.

- So how do I stop a binge?

- Oh well that.

You have to treat that like a burglary.

When a guy breaks into your house,

you just hope that give him what he wants

and he leaves peacefully.

But you know what?

You know what you don't need to do?

You don't need to go to the
bottom of every single bag

when you're on one of those binges okay.

You could just skim over the
top of your cravings right.

That is called self control.

Oh hey all right here's something.

Here's something.

Little tidbit for you.

This what's called a zero calorie binge.

Ready for this?

Okay here it goes.

Oh I'm so mad.

Oh I'm gonna punch you in the nose.

Punch you repeatedly in the nose.

That is the funniest
thing I've ever heard.


Why me?

It's not fair.

It's not fair.

Oh man I'm talking too much.

Oh I'm talking too much.

Oh I'm imitating the two people I hate.

Blah, blah, blah, blah.

All of that zero calories.

Nothing went in, nothing went in.

Nothing went in.

All day, all night catch
the feeling before you bite.

That's right.

You're welcome.

You can have that.

I'll add it to your bill.

- Steven, what's that in your mouth?

Where'd you get that from?

- From the bag on my desk.

You want one?

- I'm listening for a beep.

- Well this one's dead.

You wanna try another one?

- Not the Twizzlers, Steven.


- We beep?

- Potentially.

If I want one, it could mean that I don't

like being around you.

Or it could mean that I like Twizzlers

and then I can have one as a treat.

But hold please.

I like Twizzlers but I
don't want one right now.

- Yes.

- Steven, you and I, we don't beep.

Yay, yay, yay.

I'm so happy for us.

- Me too.

What are you talking about?

- I started seeing a
therapist about my binging

and she says that I
have to feel my feelings

instead of eating them.

- Wow.

She'll ought to win the Nobel
pizza prize for that one.


- She wants me to process things.

Get them out.


- Oh no.

They'll clog the vents, blow
out the internet connection.

Genie, let's be sensible about this.

Keep them buried deep inside

'til you explode like a
giant, dying star okay.

Thank you.

- Just give me a Twizzler.

- I prefer pink as like stuff around you,

but I prefer turquoise
to something to wear.

- I really like it.

- Turquoise is just the
best thing on earth.

Once I went swimming.

Well actually I was boogie boarding.

I was like swallowed up
by a pull in the water.

- What is the matter?

Starbucks wants their sweet and low back?

- Jeff keeps canceling plans

and seems almost like he's avoiding me,

but then he acts like he still loves me.

So how am I supposed to--

- [Mom] Good morning.

- [Genie] Mom, what are you doing here?

- Can't a mother surprise her daughter?

- [Genie] Something going on here?

- [Mom] Well, I found these in the attic.

Your father was quite the photographer.

- You don't want this anymore?

- Well I thought they
would mean more to you.

- Ooh look, a camera.

How 'bout that?

It's old.

Selfie time.

- Stop it.

- I was gonna give you
this when you got married,

but I thought you know since
I'm giving you the rest.

Your father gave me this the
night before our wedding.

(Soft music)

- But I'm not getting married.

You part with this stuff
like you don't even care.

I mean how come I never even see you care?

- Genie, of course I care.

(Phone ringing)

(soft music)

- What's the matter?

- Wedding's off.

- What?

Are you kidding?


- [Steven] He didn't say.

- I knew that this was a bad idea, Steven.

You had better charge his ass anyway

because I put so much work into this.


- Nothing.

I'm just surprised.

- Why?

It's not like we've never
been canceled on before.

Probably broke up.

- Hey.

- Hey.

I am so sorry.

I did not realize you
were working from here.

Don't mind me.

I'll just drop these off and skedaddle.

(Soft music)

- Hey goof.

What you doing here?

- I brought up your clothes.

- Hey, hey, hey.

Sue's just a doctor from LA okay.

She's moving to her New York office.

She was staying in a hotel in town.

We just we had some work to finish up

before she had to pack.

That's all.

- Her suitcase is in your bedroom.

- Yeah, she went for a run.

She needed to take a shower.

- You were too busy to see me all week.

You barely return my phone
calls, my text messages.

And then I come here and I see this

and you tell me that nothing's going on.

- Okay because I want
this relationship to work,

I'm gonna put my feelings aside

and I'm gonna try to understand

what you felt coming in here okay.

I've gotta get Sue to the airport.

I'll call you later okay.

- Well then I'll come with you.

- No, no, that's ridiculous.

- Please, Jeff, please.

Okay there's just something.

There's something wrong here.

Will you tell her that
something came up with work

and you'll call her a taxi
and you'll pay for it?

- Genie, you're going to
kill this relationship

with your issues okay.

I mean, if I don't text you
right away, I've vanished.

If I don't compliment
you enough, you're hurt.

Now you think I'm cheating on you.

I love you so much but who
wants to live this way?


I gotta go.

- Please Jeff.

Please don't leave me like this.

Jeff, please don't leave me like this.

(Phone beeping)

(bright music)

Oh my god.

My dad used to take me here.

I thought this place closed.

- [Jeff] It was.

They redid the whole thing.

♪ I'm looking for someone ♪

♪ For someone ♪

♪ But now I am just staying here ♪

♪ I've been looking for someone ♪

♪ In places where lovers live ♪

- Jeff, I don't think I can do this.

I think I'm gonna be sick.

- Come on.

Don't be a baby.

It's gonna be fun.

♪ I believe, I believe ♪

♪ But my heart ♪

- Oh yeah.

I promise it's gonna be fine.

- I'm sorry to bother you but.

- Where are you?

- Santa's Village.

Jeff took me on the drop.

I don't know what's happening
but I can't face him.

- Well you probably had
your equilibrium thrown off,

which can effect your emotions.

Maybe it's a small panic attack.

It's not a big deal.

We can get through this.

- Jeff's a scary ride.

- [Woman] Hey, there's a line out here.

- I'm talking to my therapist.

Can you not?

- Can I not what hold it in?

No, I cannot.

- Jeff's not a ride.

Jeff's a man.

We just have to figure out if
he's the right man for you.

Right now I want you to go put
some cold water on your face.

Splash it on your face.

Okay sweetie?

And breathe.

- Man troubles?

- Yeah.

- Dump his ass.

- But what if it's me?

What if he's every woman's dream?

- Girl, you on a public bathroom
floor crying like a baby.

That ain't no woman's dream.

- Can you give that to the?

I need the lady to.

(Soft music)

- Well thank you for trying
to make things better for us.

You wanna come up?

- No, I'm kind of tired.

I'll talk to you tomorrow.

- Okay.


(Soft music)

(phone ringing)


- Ruh roh.

- It's okay.

As long as I identify the emotion,

Ellen says I shouldn't fight the binge.

I can negotiate.

- Like you get the Pringles
and it gets the kids?

- Sort of.

- Listen, I'm headed over
to throw me a freaking bowl.

I have to make a gag gift
for a bachelorette party.

Wanna come?

- And so Ellen said that
one of my many problems

is that I don't have object permanence.

- Didn't you get that lasered?

- It's when you cover a
baby's toy with a blanket

and he cries because he
thinks that it's gone forever,

but as he gets older he understands

that even though he can't see
it, that it's still there.

This is why I flip out
whenever Jeff is busy

or he gets mad and he doesn't talk to me.

You know, I think he's gone forever.

- What?

It's a gag gift.

Get it?

Gag gift.

Okay, object permanence 101.

What's hiding under the blankie?

(Laughs) Top of the morning to ya.

- We have to eat light

because I'm meeting Lori for cake later.

- Actually there's something
I wanna talk to you about.

Kay wants to get engaged.

- What?

Are you in love with her?

- Are you in love with Jeff?

- Stop not answering me.

- Stop not answering me.

- Can you two bring it down a notch?

- The relationship is tough
but I'm working on my stuff.

I'm difficult.

- Well maybe you need someone stronger.

- Jeff is strong.

At least he tells me how he feels.

- Yeah and then he shuts you out

as soon as you tell him how you feel.

- Well nobody knows how you feel.

- [Waitress] Do you
mind opening the blinds?

Can I take your order, folks?

- [Genie] Oh yeah.

We are going to split the spinach--

- Actually I'm gonna take the French dip.

- That is it.

You are just like every other man.

- Why, because Kay wants to marry me?

If you don't want me to
marry Kay, just say it.

Just say it.

Say I don't want you to marry Kay.

- [Customer] I want you to marry Kay.

- What?

I didn't put that up there.

(Phone beeping)

Casey fell and hit her head.

Missus Harris doesn't know what to do.

She doesn't know if she should
take her to the hospital.

- Come on, let's go.

I'll drive you.

- Hey.

- Her doctor says she looks fine.

We just have to watch her
and check in on her tomorrow.

- Hey Case, I heard you hit your head.

You know rumor has it that Bruce
Wayne fell and hit his head

and when he woke up, all
of a sudden he was Batman.

- That sounds a lot more like Two Face.

- Which one's he?

- Oh so Two Face has a
good side and an evil side.

He uses the good side to cover up

all the evil things he's done.

(Soft music)

- Have you decided what
you'd like to order?

- Yes.

Out of control chocolate cake for her.

Carrot cake for me.

- Thank you.

- You still worried about Casey?

- No, she's gonna be okay.

Jeff and I got in this stupid fight.

I was mad at him because
he didn't go visit Casey.

- Why didn't he?

- He said he had some emergency.

So I got upset with him and
then he got upset with me

for being upset with him and
then I got upset with him

for being upset with me
for being upset with him.

So then he canceled our
plans for the weekend.

I just have to stop getting mad at him

about things that he can't control.

- Okay.

What about that suitcase?

- I trust him.

- Here you go.

- Oh thank you.

- This one's my favorite, too.

- Okay, Genes.

You've turned into one of
those stupid, pathetic,

stringy haired woman that we can't stand.

What happened to my confident friend?

You know, even if he's telling the truth,

I've never seen you this unhappy.

I know that you love this guy,

but is this how you wanna live?

It's like this is it, Genes.

This is who you are with Jeff.

(Soft music)

- I don't think I can eat this.


Switch, switch, switch, switch, switch.

- Why are we doing this?

- I've just demoted Jeff.

He's now carrot cake.

- You love chocolate cake.

You'll try to stay away but you'll cave.

Switch back.

Come on.

- No, I don't want this.

I don't want this.

I don't want it, I don't
want it, I don't want it.

- Okay all right.


Are you really gonna end it?

(Bright music)



I'm looking into your future right now.

And you know what I see?

One day when you least expect
it, you'll fall in love

with a nice apple cobbler (laughs).

(Soft music)

Yeah, it's not bad.

- I can get used to this.

- We're not switching back.

(Gentle music)

- That is tart.

- That's the ginger.

- Don't you ever let yourself go?

Like does deep dish
pizza ever in your mind?

- Not really.

- What do you do if you're feeling hurt?

- I cry.

- How do you do that?

Like make yourself cry.

- You know that racy feeling you get

when you're obsessing about something?

Like you're a crazy person
and it won't go away.

Life is bad, bad, bad and it's
never gonna get any better.

- Yeah, you basically just
wrote my Match profile.

- I dive in.

- [Genie] To what?

- The wrongness of it.

Just dwell on how awful it is.

- Why would you wanna do that?

- Emotional detox.

It cleans me out.

I feel better afterwards.

I guess, you know, after
all the swelling goes down,

I think that maybe I even
look a little prettier.

I think that sobbing is
the fountain of youth.

Or something like that.

- But you don't ever cry about stuff here

at the office though right?

- Every time you put one of
those cups of poison at my desk.

- I am such a jerk.

I'm so sorry, Andrea.

I guess I was just jealous
because of how skinny you are.

I'm so sorry.

- Thank you.

Thank you.

♪ I understand ♪

♪ Whatever I feel ♪

♪ Is wherever I am ♪

♪ Watching my life and how its grown ♪

♪ Looking on back to things I've known ♪

♪ It's not so bad all alone
coming home to myself ♪

♪ Again ♪

♪ I'm coming ♪

♪ Home ♪

- I know it's only been a week,

but I miss him so much.

I walk around with this hole in my gut.

And it never leaves.

- Are you binging?

(Dramatic music)

Oh, oh.


- What just happened?

- You faced a truth.

You made decisions.

You took control with
dignity and strength.

I mean yes, you're in a lot of
pain, but you're managing it.

Well done.

- Well I was better off eating.

At least then I knew my life sucked.

- Yeah, everyone's life sucks a little.

- Does this mean I'm cured?

- Cured, no, no.

But very well equipped.

- My mom's been calling more lately.

Like she wants to get together.

- What do you make of that?

- I don't know.

She feels bad for me.

But I needed her to feel bad about my dad.

To share that with me.

- I know.

She's limited.

I have a question for you.

I'm gonna challenge you on this one.

Does fixating on the
ways she can't be there,

prevent you from seeing
the ways she wants to be?

No matter what is going on.

No matter how hard things get.

There's a way to turn it around.

I mean it could be small but
it can change the course.

You wanna know what it is?

A choice.

All possibilities start from there.

What made you wanna start your business?

- The idea that someone could
be going on with their day.

It could even be a bad day.

But they have no idea
that something amazing

is about to happen.

I love being a part of that.

- [Andrea] All you can get.

Like you know what I mean?

- [Steven] You're both needed
in the conference room.

- [Genie] What?

Is it back on?

- Yup.

Andrea, I need you to go to the Garrity.

They're gonna want a check
in advance this time.

And since you're the flower
expert of the family.

Tom has a bouquet he wants to show you.

- Steven, did I tell you?

Every flower has its own sentiment.

- Yeah?

When this is all over, I'll be sure

to send Quentin a long
stemmed chrysanthe-butt.

Go on, get out of here.

You wanna talk about your feelings?

- Yeah, I can't believe--

- Put on this dress, girl.

And wash your hands.

(Bright music)

And don't let it hit the floor.

- [Genie] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Oh my god.

(Bright music)


Since you stopped pigging out,

your waist and ass are smaller.

- Really?

- But so is.

- Can't you ever be kind?

- I tried it once.

Made me beep.

- Wouldn't it be the
best surprise party ever?

Gay man fakes gayness to
surprise the bride to be.

- No.

The billboard's up.

She can't miss it.

- Great.

♪ Surprise me with something
I never asked for ♪

♪ We both know I just say no ♪

- [Genie] So if you could
just move that one over there,

I think it would be perfect.

- Guess who got dumped?

- I knew that this would happen.

- We still got paid so it's fine.

We just gotta get his guests to go home.

- That is so humiliating.

- I thought you'd be happy.

- I am but he's still our client.

We can't just close up and go home.

That would be heartless.

- You wanna fix him up with the chef?

- Idea.

Idea, idea, idea, idea, idea.

Okay, okay.

If the guests thinks we're
shooting a wedding, let's do it.

They won't know it's fake
and he still saves face.

- One small detail.

Bride and groom.

- I fit into the wedding
dress and you have a tux.

- Fine.

I'll get an extra to
play father of the bride,

so he can walk you down.

See you at the altar.

- Wait.

Don't you think we should
tell Bill and Randy?

- Man, you are good.

- I know.

- Okay.

(Gentle music)

- Look at that beautiful bride.

(Gentle music)

- Can you give me a minute?


I'm very emotional lately.

I've been like a car with no brakes.

- You familiar with Taoism?

It's a philosophy.

Since water always finds the
easiest way around blockages,

that's how we need to
move through our lives.

Go the way of the water.

- I don't understand.

- Act like water.

Let life happen.

Just follow the flow.

(Gentle music)

Was this for today?

- That was from my mother.

For my wedding day.

- [Woman] I'll help you.

- Well, here comes the bride.

(Gentle music)

- Surprise.

(Gentle music)

- I clean up in a tux but
I am not well groomed.

If you know what I mean.

You still love him?

How do you feel about Quentin?

(Gentle music)

- I figured it was time someone
gave you a happy surprise.

- How did you?

How did everyone?

I don't know what to say.

- I think you just say I do.

The night I gave you that necklace

I knew I wanted to marry you,

but I just felt like
proposing was so ordinary.

So the next morning I called Steven

and I had my buddy Bill
come to your office.

- But the wedding was canceled

and that was before we broke up.

- We had a lot of difficulties between us

and I admit I got distracted,

but then I realized why
I made that commitment.

I love you.

We can't just walk away from this.

Genie Burns.

My one and only true love.

Will you marry me?

(Soft music)

- Half chocolate cake, half carrot cake.

My wedding gift to you.

- Jeff, what's changed?

- Everything has changed.

My perspective.

My whole outlook has changed.

We can have it all if you just trust me

and stop letting your
insecurities get in the way.

- My insecurities?

Just because I have thought or a feeling

or I voice my opinion, that
doesn't make me insecure.

In fact, the only thing that
made me insecure was you.

- I'm always trying my best.

Okay I just need you to give
me the benefit of the doubt.

- The benefit of the doubt.

Like that day that I
stopped by your apartment

and Sue was there?

You guys weren't working?

She was staying there, wasn't she?

- We have to face forward.

It's the key to any relationship, Genie.

Just look around you.

I did all of this for you.


This is how much I love you.

- I love you, too,

but I love me more.

I'm sorry.


(gentle music)

- Somebody order banana pancakes?

- You keep a really good secret.

- Genes, I had to.

There's so much I wanted to tell you.

- Really?

Like what?

- When Steven sent out Jeff's invitation,

I had an unexpected reaction.

I was gonna tell you.

I even rented one of your signs

and I was gonna have you see
it when we had lunch that day,

but then Casey got hurt
and I realized that

if you wanted to marry Jeff,
then I had to let that happen.

It just felt wrong to be with Kay

while I waited to find out.

- What do you mean?

Did you guys--

- Oh yeah we broke up like a month ago.

I just kind of been
avoiding you until this.

- You waited for me.

- I waited for me.

(Gentle music)

- You realize that you just
told me that you love me.

- I did?

- Standing, sitting, staying.

Not leaving no matter what.

That's what you said.

That's how you show love.

You did.

- I guess I did.

So, that wedding's all paid for huh?

- Yup.

I mean it would be a
shame to waste a freebie.

- Horrible, horrible shame.

How 'bout a dance with the bride huh?

- I would love that.

(Gentle music)

- You're stupid.

- You are.

Hey Dan.

- Yeah?

- What was up with that French dip?

- Oh.

Oh you mean.

You mean this one?


♪ Gonna be a big surprise ♪

♪ Like to thank you for bringing
so much joy into my life ♪

- Mazel tov.

♪ What you gonna do, who you gonna be ♪

♪ Guess we just have to wait and see ♪

♪ But in the meantime we're
gonna have a sweet time ♪

♪ Chasing all your dreams ♪

♪ Shoot for the moon, head
out through the galaxy ♪

♪ Grab every star you see ♪

♪ Enjoy the ride ♪

♪ This is your time ♪

♪ You're gonna turn upside down ♪

♪ Turn left, turn right in this life ♪

♪ What you get is what you will redeem ♪

♪ On the way to everything ♪

♪ It's all about the way that
you get where you're going ♪

♪ About a million ways to try ♪

♪ You can crash it all
like a wrecking ball ♪

♪ Or just glide on a dragonfly ♪

♪ When the good heart starts ♪

♪ Got a couple shots in the dark ♪

♪ I can guarantee ♪

♪ There's a journey that you're on ♪

♪ Will take you where you're meant to be ♪

♪ Shoot for the moon, head
out through the galaxy ♪

♪ Grab every star you see ♪

♪ Enjoy the ride ♪

♪ This is your time ♪

♪ You're gonna turn upside down ♪

♪ Turn left, turn right in this life ♪

♪ What you get is what you will redeem ♪

♪ On the way to everything ♪

♪ First steps, first words ♪

♪ Everything you're gonna learn ♪

♪ First kiss, broken heart ♪

♪ Take your keys to the car ♪

♪ Lights out on the town ♪

♪ Breaking out and breaking down ♪

♪ Falling in love ♪

♪ Making it last ♪

♪ Life goes by much too fast ♪

♪ Enjoy the ride ♪

♪ This is your time ♪

♪ You're gonna turn upside down ♪

♪ Turn left, turn right in this life ♪

♪ What you get is what you will redeem ♪

♪ On the way to everything ♪

♪ On the way to everything ♪

♪ Welcome to the world ♪

♪ I will be your tour guide ♪

♪ Gonna be a big surprise ♪