Some Girls Do (1969) - full transcript
A series of unexplainable accidents befall the people and companies responsible for developing the world's first supersonic airliner (SST1). A British agent is sent to investigate and with the help of another agent uncovers a plot masterminded by Carl Petersen who stands to gain eight million pounds if the aircraft is not ready by a certain date. The evil Petersen has developed a number of "robots" (actually rather beautiful girls with "electronic brains") to help him sabotage the SST1 project by means of "infrasound" (extreme low frequency sound waves) which can be directed at people or objects with devastating results.
j some girls do have the power
to corrupt and destroy you j
j they'll take you and they'll break you j
j or they'll make you a king j
j they'll bring you the summer j
j when winter is due j
j tis truly j
j quite amazing the things
that some girls do j
senior aerodynamics engineer
Yes Mr. petersen.
Expecting turbulence are we?
No sir.
j some girls do satisfy you
but they'll all mystify you j
j they'll thrill you and some will do j
j anything you desire j
j there's no doubt about it j
j it's proved to be true j
j there is nothing in the world j
j that can do what some girls do j
Fuselage.
Yes Mr. petersen.
j but this is life, it's
all part of the game j
j trying to guess the unknown j
j they're just one route
to this glamorous game j
j it cannot be played alone j
Gee Mr. drummond that was fantastic.
Now for the engines.
Yes Mr. petersen.
The countdown continues from 85.
84.
83.
82.
81.
80.
79.
78.
There's someone at the door for you.
77.
76.
75.
74.
73.
72.
71.
70.
69.
68.
67.
66.
65.
64.
63.
62.
61.
60.
59.
58.
57.
56.
55.
54.
53.
52.
51.
50.
49.
48.
47.
46.
45.
43.
42.
41.
40.
35.
34.
33.
32.
31.
Oh!
Clumsy brute, look what you've done.
13, 12, 11, 10, 9.
It'll wash off.
7,6,5,4.
3, 2, 1.
There she blows!
And what a beaut!
Your drink sir.
Thank you.
Oh gee Mr. drummond.
Me having a drink with youl!
What is it?
Well pretty strong.
It's a bull shot.
Gosh!
Tastes like beef soup.
It is beef soup!
Is it?
Well a little of it is.
The rest's vodka.
Hello darling.
Wasn't it lovely?
Wow!
Did you do that Mr. drummond?
Do what?
The eye.
Good heavens no.
Don't do things like that to girls.
I bet they're both spies.
Well as a matter of fact
you're completely right.
You see the one, the one with the glasses.
She's Hungarian.
The eyes are disguised of course.
Ah yes!
Damn clever these Hungarians.
Wow!
Actually she's working for us now.
Because she's madly in love with you?
Well what do you think?
What does it feel like
to be a hero Mr. drummond?
Careful.
What?
That's my bad knee.
Oh.
No really Mr. drummond.
You are a hero.
why you caught that man that
killed the secretary of state
and then you went and
kidnapped all those tanks,
And then you caught that other man...
Ssh.
More Hungarians.
Oh, oh I'm sorry Mr. drummond.
But gee, if ever you need
a girl Friday I'll do it.
Well now's your chance.
Me?
Mr. drummond's holiday office speaking.
Mr. drummond's secretary.
Oh.
Oh I'm sorry.
It's your secretary.
Hello miss crumb.
Miss crumb!
What?
The sst1?
When?
Right, I'll be there as soon as possible.
You have to go home?
When you gotta go you gotta go.
Oh!
Mr. drummond?
Do I look like Mr. drummond?
Where is he?
Who are you?
I'm his daily, who are you.
Miss Mary.
You?
I'm a cookery school.
Oh.
Have you got a light?
I don't approve of smoking,
it ruins the taste buds.
Where is Mr. drummond?
Is it important?
Yes it is.
You have to stand
still for it to go away.
You can tell me if you like.
I'm his confidential daily.
When are you expecting him back?
I'm not, he's gone on holiday.
Why didn't you say
so, when did he leave?
Two days ago.
He went for a fortnight.
Changed his mind though,
he's coming back today.
Oh.
In that case I'll just leave him a note.
will you be sure to see that he gets this
as soon as he gets back?
Thank you.
It's your greatest
aeroplane ever Mr. Mortimer.
In fact I think it's
the greatest ever built.
We know the prime minister
wants you to have a knighthood.
Oh congratulations!
yes but unfortunately I'm
afraid it isn't possible,
Not yet, the home office.
Well what have they to
do with aircraft designs?
Itisn't that it's, they
say you're breaking the law.
Well indeed, do they.
well I can assure you sir that
I have never broken the law
to my knowledge.
Well you're classified old
chap, and so is your briefcase.
Official secrets act.
Well I've always been of the opinion
that my secrets are safer in the custody
Of someone who knows and
understands them, me.
ah but if somebody kidnaps you
And your notes are with you...
Now look here sir Dudley,
I mean Mr. Mortimer.
With that briefcase under your arm
You're in danger with every step you take.
Now look old chap we haven't told you
But there's been a couple
of accidents recently.
We were getting worried about
anything happening to you.
so we've been trying to insure you
For five million pounds.
only we can't get anyone
willing to accept the risk,
Not while you walk around
with that briefcase.
Five million?
Well you're worth it,
we couldn't replace you.
I was thinking it's not very much.
Well all right.
Good day gentlemen.
Oh sorry.
Now this must be locked away
sir, that's very important.
What about that?
It's welded sir, for safety.
Good day gentlemen.
He's right you know, he
is worth more than that.
Pandora!
Sir Dudley Mortimer.
Lord Mortimer.
Is something wrong?
Did you have a breakdown?
Did you have a puncture?
Maybe he ran out of water.
Oh yes.
My dear young lady,
Even I know that water
does not drive a car.
Oh look!
Here.
Look.
Oh petroleum.
Oh poor little man, what will you do.
Oh don't worry we'll tow you, won't we.
- I don't want a tow!
- Get the rope pandora.
- I will not be towed!
- It's all right.
No I'm gonna push.
I'm gonna push.
Take the handbrake off will you.
Put that rope away.
Put it away I say.
No stop, stop.
I'm perfectly capable
of managing this myself.
In you go little man.
We take care of you.
Stop, stop!
Stop how dare you!
Stop it, stop!
I'll have the law on you two young ladies!
Stop, how dare you!
Stop I say!
Stop!
Bye bye!
Drive carefully Mr. Mortimer.
Pull
damn!
Well Hugh, what do you make of it.
Well it ought to be
too late for sabotage.
the prototype's been built, it flies
And the contract's been signed.
Pull!
Good shot.
but they can still cancel the contract
until the end of next month.
Pull
that's funny.
Somebody's shooting my clays.
Yes old chap, you are.
You know if this news gets about.
Hey you shooting at my birds?
No, aren't you?
Pull.
great Scott, I think that's
the most amazing bit of
Trick shooting I've ever seen.
Hello there please.
It is baroness Helga is it not.
look Hugh, if this contract's cancelled
the country stands to lose
A thousand million pounds in exports.
You've got to do something about it.
I'll do my best.
- Ah my dear thorensen.
- Lord dunburry.
May I present major Newman,
major Newman lord dunburry.
And?
Oh Hugh drummond, I thought you'd met.
The Hugh drummond?
Well.
We should have met sooner.
On business, but this is much nicer.
Business?
You insure some of my aeroplanes.
One of them has just crashed.
I think you
owe me an apology madam.
But your friend had missed.
I hoped to save you the shame.
Oh my dear girl.
Mr. drummond's a better
shot even than you.
I'm the duffer.
Better shot than me I doubt.
But we could see.
You will come and visit
me soon Mr. drummond.
Thorensen experimental aerodynamics.
Dunburry will tell you.
Right, I'll be down tomorrow.
Thorensen?
Oh they're gliders, sail planes.
They've done some research for us.
They're a good firm, not very big.
Something crashed?
Oh just one of his gliders.
not very important, not one of his,
Well I'll see you there perhaps.
Bye.
You are a good shot.
I'm also a good cook.
That is our dinner.
Fresh?
Pheasants are supposed to
be hung for a week you know.
I'm a very good cook.
You'll never know they were fresh.
Well, why?
Why what?
Why sit halfway up a
tree, middle of surrey,
shooting at my Clay pigeons,
In order to come back here
and go to bed with me.
I wanted to see how
good a shot you were.
And?
Better than most men.
And what's the end
product supposed to be?
Must there be one.
well shooting often ends up
In somebody getting killed you know.
Would you mind?
Packing?
All right.
Thank you.
Hello.
Flicky?
You forget your ski.
Flicky.
Flicky. - Wow!
I bet they're a pushover
once you get 'em up here.
Now flicky listen to me.
I don't want to seem inhospitable but...
Well don't I even get a drink?
Champagne or beef soup.
A bull shot.
Over there.
I'll make one.
Eh flicky, how long were
you thinking of staying.
In London that is.
Until my aunt's better.
Your aunt?
Yes.
She broke her leg.
Isn't that marvellous!
well you see there's no
one to take care of her
Except for me.
That's why I'm here.
but she won't need me all the time so
I can be free to help you too.
Yes.
Who's Angela?
My daily.
Oh.
Well she left a note for you.
It says Mr. drummond.
Ssh.
Telephone.
Oh.
You have company.
Why didn't you say something?
Oh flicky.
Ah, the bedroom.
My bed.
She's off the phone now.
Gosh.
She was in a hurry.
What do we do now?
Flicky.
That's a silly question isn't it.
I mean first thing we
do is take your coat off
And then we draw a bath, and...
- Mr. drummond I, I...
- What do you like
For breakfast in the morning?
My, my aunt she may
be waiting up for me.
I think I better call her.
Flicky, flicky.
For a femme fatale you make
a damn good ski instructor.
Your aunt doesn't exist does she.
Mayfair 8860 then.
What's that?
Claridge's.
Claridge's hotel, good evening.
Hey.
Put your finger on there,
don't let go till I tell you.
Ah.
What is it?
A plastic explosive.
enough to blow the whole
place to smithereens
And you and me with it.
It's all right, it's quite
safe, you can let go now.
You see she replaced the
telephone mic with that.
One word in here and poof.
After you.
Hello, hello Mr. drummond.
Bang!
One, two, three, crack.
Well done major Newman, right in the bowl.
So sorry dear lady.
Relax the egg, wing
commander, relax the egg.
Now then come along, all together then.
One, two, three, relax, crack.
That's it.
Oh dear, we'll have to do
better than that Mr. thorensen.
I will try miss Mary.
Little egg behind the ear.
Thank you dear lady.
Sir!
Why don't you watch major
Newman, he does it so well.
Show him major Newman.
There, now you try.
Oh dear, time to stop.
Never mind, tomorrow we'll start whipping.
whipping our golden sweet
nature nurtured eggs
Into a lovely creamy froth.
I can't wait!
but for the moment back
to our responsibilities
And don't forget my aprons.
you will do your homework
won't you Mr. thorensen
well done major.
A special diploma for you my boy.
Thank you.
11 o'clock tomorrow then.
Goodnight.
Bless you bishop.
Kills the taste buds.
A merciful death.
Hello dear little man.
Miss Mary?
Miss Mary?
All right you can come out now.
What the hell are you doing here?
Well the note your
cleaning lady left you.
So you decided to play
private eye did you?
But I just got here as you drove up.
Well let's see if
she's upstairs shall we.
Hey, why a cookery school?
well firstly 500 guineas a course,
secondly it's a good front
and it provides the sort of clients
That it pays to inform on.
Ooh.
Who's been after what?
Yes and I don't know.
the only thing likely to
interest a thief around here
would be nasty gossip.
Maybe, maybe they're
after his diary then.
maybe you're right
But I don't think miss
Mary's that obvious.
All the same, you could
be on the right track.
Well what do you make of this, hmm.
Look here.
Wing commander Aston's Christmas party.
Strip poker before...
Yeah I don't think that's
very suitable for you.
And the boat.
Doesn't mean anything to me.
Doesn't say anything
about my baroness either.
Or the sst1.
That's what you mean.
Clever little thing aren't you.
Shut up!
That's miss Mary.
Yeah still warm.
His friends must've
been here very recently.
What do you make of that?
H d Tor gl dang.
What?
I think it's a warning
of some kind flicky.
That gliding's a bit dangerous.
Thank you.
You have looked through the
parachute yourself my dear.
Mr. drummond is far too valuable to lose.
Oh yes sir.
I packed it myself.
You say it broke up in
the air Mr. thorensen.
My experts tell me so.
Though somebody had beaten it
with a club as it was flying.
One would need a very big
club to smash that, eh.
Well we shall have to see what happens.
Good luck Mr. drummond.
Release at 4000 feet sir.
All right.
You are out of sight now darling.
Thank you!
He's releasing now.
Drummond sail plane to control.
Drummond sail plane to tower.
Hello drummond sail
plane, come in please.
He's broken off.
There he goes!
Oh poor lamb.
do you know, I think
someone cut the rip cord
of his parachute.
He's trying to open it by hand.
How much longer?
Oh seconds.
Hugh drummond, you have the
worst stiff neck I ever see.
Yeah you can say that again.
You can do that again.
Tell me what did you
find out about thorensen?
Thorensen?
He's come to the sauna, I give
him a massage, he goes home.
Sometimes I don't see him for weeks.
And when he's not in england
he's in north Africa.
North Africa?
Didn't mention a man
called barouche did he?
Barouche, barouche,
he talks about barouche.
He meets him too in north Africa.
And something about a boat.
Osprey 111?
Yes that's it.
A very fast boat he said.
He mentioned somebody
else called Carl petersen.
Petersen?
Is that any help??
Birgit.
I absolutely adore you.
- You do?
- Mm hmm.
And now I've got to rush off.
You sure you love me so?
Well I can't prove it in
front of the natives can I.
You're next major Newman.
Hello.
Tell him I'll be down in a minute.
Yes?
Boo!
Boo.
It's me!
I know it's you.
How do you know it's me?
You didn't even look.
How do you like my dress?
Just the thing for
following me around in.
Mm, I thought so.
Where we dining?
We aren't dining anywhere.
I've made other arrangements.
Aw shucks.
You must admit it was a good idea though.
I was even on the same plane with you
and you didn't spot me.
Well how could I?
You've got a black wig
and dark glasses on.
Now if you'll excuse me
I've got to rush off.
Help yourself.
Flicky.
Yes?
You know everybody's
got a home somewhere.
Why don't you go to yours, mm?
There's a good girl.
I can't, it's too far away.
Flicky.
I'm hungry.
Well try the hotel
restaurant, excellent.
I want to go out.
Go to the kasbah.
With you?
there's a restaurant there
where the sheep's eyes are
A richly rewarding experience.
Sheep's eyes?
Yuck.
Ah Mr. drummond.
How do you do.
You from the British embassy?
oh yes I hope I won't shock you old chap
But you'll find me a bit
of a fallout you know.
This way please.
I think you mean dropout.
Do I?
Oh yes, so I do.
my name's carruthers by the
way, peregrine carruthers,
but you can call me butch.
That yours?
Yes, super isn't she.
Positively psychedelic.
Oh I hope you're safe.
That's what mother keeps worrying about.
Who cares Mr. drummond, get with it.
Live dangerously.
What does his excellency
think about your swinging image?
I don't know, he doesn't say.
Wonder why not.
He's mummy's brother.
Here's your invitation.
Lord dunburry laid it on.
It's a pre-race party.
Pre-race, what for?
Powerboats.
International gold cup tomorrow.
Who's lady manderley?
Oh ex patriot society type.
Always in the cheap press.
Yachts, the riviera, money to burn.
Last time it was a harem party.
Great fun.
Come as your favourite eunuch.
I'm glad it was last time,
I feel a bit overdressed.
Barouche be there?
Oh I can't say old chap.
Where do you fit in?
Me?
Oh I've been assigned as your bodyguard.
Good grief.
Look out!
When will they learn
to drive on the left?
Madge!
Glad you could make it.
Lovely sweet.
Darling, darling get me a drink will you.
Isn't he sweet.
Cecil.
Who's the contact butch?
No idea old chap, I presume
they'll reveal themselves.
By the look of some of these
dresses it won't be long now.
Yes I see what you mean.
Oh well I'll be around
if you need any protection.
Thank you butch.
Mr. drummond?
Yes.
Reggie!
This is divine.
You always make a party go so.
Mr. drummond.
Oh yes, of course.
Reggie come here at once!
Cool baby!
Good evening Mr. drummond.
Sorry to have kept you waiting.
Forgive the uproar out there.
My parties suit my purpose.
People think I'm a fool and
they talk and talk and talk.
Now Mr. barouche.
dunburry put an urgent on it
And I'm afraid we haven't
been able to do much.
Very nice.
Mysterious person barouche.
But you'll see for yourself.
He's definitely coming here tonight.
Who's kruger?
Built this boat.
Osprey lll.
Mm hmm.
He's expected to win
the gold cup tomorrow.
What's his connection with barouche?
We're not sure.
except at one of my parties
kruger boasted he could take
barouche for half a million
if he wanted to.
Something about barouche
buying the osprey.
Half a million.
That's an awful lot of money for a boat.
Could he have been buying
anything else as well?
Possibly.
you see kruger's father was a scientist
Doing advanced work on infrasound.
He died last year.
Police think it was murder.
There was no proof.
Infrasound.
What's that?
Subsonic vibrations.
You can't hear it but it's there.
It can destroy life very quickly.
kruger's father was trying to find out
How to control and direct it.
What's thorensen got
to do with all of this?
We've drawn a blank there.
Oh except that thorensen often
flies down to meet barouche.
Yes?
Thank you.
Barouche has just arrived.
Darling you look gorgeous!
Angel fetch me a drink.
My own party and I'm dying of thirst.
Over there.
Darling man, I'm honoured.
My sheikh of the desert.
So exciting!
So mysterious!
Oh you must meet Mr. drummond.
He's just popped down
from London for the race.
Ah drummond.
Your reputation proceeds you.
Insurance isn't it?
That's correct.
We must have a lot of
things in common Mr. drummond.
Love for the subdued for example.
Lady manderley's parties...
Good evening Mr. drummond.
Surprise surprise.
Your aim's gone to pot baroness.
My aim is perfect.
Dead centre.
Just that you drilled the wrong heart.
Oh don't be so egocentric darling.
You're not the only interest I have.
Oh you mustn't say things like that.
You'll make me jealous.
That's a grunig Mark six.
Special Swedish target pistol.
Virtually guarantees you a bullseye.
Only one problem.
Fires just one shot at a time.
But I might've reloaded.
I'll take a chance on that.
I won't!
You see it was loaded after all.
To you Mr. drummond.
- What?
- Hello mr kruger.
What do you want?
I've told your boss already
we've done our bit of business
and that's that.
He didn't get everything.
He didn't get the boat.
That's his tough luck huh.
But he wants it.
Not a chance baby, now scram.
What's that?
That's little pandora's box.
Is this kruger's boat house?
Yes he's over there.
Silly Mr. kruger.
Is he dead?
That's strange.
Not a Mark on him.
Just like miss Mary.
Well thank heavens he's not British.
Well he's not my responsibility you see.
Why kill him though?
What's so important about a boat?
Sound waves, could that be it.
What do you mean?
Well young kruger there
Was always talking about sound waves.
Powdered glass.
Of course.
Infrasound.
That's it.
That's what he was always going
on about, infrasound, yes.
Wonder if there's some
emergency lighting here.
Yes.
What was that?
That's infrasonic sound.
Directed down through
these holes in the hull.
Breaks up the water friction.
Makes the boat slide faster.
And hey presto, you've won the race.
No wonder he was bumped off.
There's no need to murder
a man to stop him cheating.
All you've gotta do is to report
him to the race committee.
But what makes you so sure
that he will come himself?
I know him.
He will.
Look for him.
Will all competitors
for the international gold cup
Proceed to the start buoy.
Oh look, there!
Yes.
Put 'em down.
I say it's terribly
exciting playing decoy.
I feel just like one
of those stuffed ducks.
Five seconds to go.
Four, three, two, one.
I say!
Do you think we could stop for a moment?
Didn't you say live dangerously butch?
Yes.
Well live dangerously.
They're trying to cut us off.
They've switched on the Sonic.
Tear gas!
Go on, you go there.
Drive.
Baroness Helga.
Five o'clock, one mile.
Estimated time of arrival, three minutes.
Received, central out.
Is this what you're after?
Don't touch it.
Turn it off!
Slow down or I'll shoot.
If you shoot me we'll
never stop in time.
You look a mess.
Well.
Not really used to roughing it baroness.
It won't be for long.
And it's a comfortable place to die.
Ooh!
Do you mind?
- Move.
- Hmm.
Cosy little place. - Come on.
Come on, move.
You wait here.
Two against one Mr. drummond.
We don't wanna miss the
manager though, do we.
A drink sir.
Black and white with water please.
Black and white.
And water.
No ice.
- No ice.
- Right away sir.
And you sir?
Nothing.
Nothing for me thank you.
Black and white.
And water.
Thank you.
This way please.
Hmm not bad.
Little less water next time.
Oh dear, that reminds me,
His excellency's expecting us for dinner.
My dear carruthers.
Don't be alarmed.
Ah Mr. drummond.
How very nice of you to come.
Thank you ladies.
You're not barouche at all,
You're thorensen aren't you.
Oh no no, he's barouche.
I saw him shot.
Thorensen.
The killing of barouche was a necessity.
There was too much curiosity.
A coup de theatre, my dear sir.
Would you care for something
to drink Mr. drummond?
It's inevitable I suppose.
This desire to disguise yourself.
What do you mean?
the whole civilised
world finds Carl petersen
totally repulsive.
You seem to have reached
the same conclusion.
Who is this Carl petersen?
You are.
I can smell you.
You think you're so damn
clever don't you drummond.
But I'll show you.
I'll show you.
This, this island on the
crossroads of the mediterranean.
From here I will control the
whole destiny of the world.
Ridiculous you can't even
control your own temper.
Come on carruthers.
Mustn't keep he waiting
any longer must we.
Don't move Mr. drummond.
Drop it.
Hello flicky.
I wondered what had happened to you.
I missed you.
I shan't miss you.
So very slowly back down there.
And we're all changed for dinner.
Shall we gentlemen?
Shall we?
Yes.
The telegram you were expecting Carl.
Thank you my dear.
How do you like the clothes
We provided for you Mr. drummond?
Excellent, they
might've been made for me.
They were my dear fellow.
They were.
History repeats itself.
Napoleon dreamt of the entire universe
Thronging to his door.
Now I shall fulfil his dreams.
Dressed as the Duke of Wellington?
Well of course my dear fellow.
Never back a loser.
What's a nice girl like you
doing in a dump like this?
never, not even in england,
have I ever come across a hotel
Where the service met
with my satisfaction.
So I built and staffed my own.
pandora, I'm sure you'd prefer something
A trifle more exotic,
wouldn't you my dear.
You know my taste.
And what about you flicky,
with your sweet tooth.
I think she deserves a little reward
For having looked after you
so nicely, don't you think.
I thought working for
you was its own reward.
I can't eat that stuff.
Why don't you give it to pandora?
Do you think you should darling?
It's terribly bad for the complexion.
I have a perfect complexion.
see Mr. drummond, to get perfect service
One needs total single-mindedness.
Thank you sir.
See what I mean.
Ordinary servant would've
panicked, started to scream.
Not my girls.
Hello central.
Ready for number nine.
Thank you
control, message received.
Number seven please.
They'll drown!
Help!
I can't swim
Remarkable girls
aren't they Mr. drummond.
You'll see that in training.
I wonder what for.
Control Mr. drummond.
Perfect control.
These girls can do anything.
Jerks jerks, titty who.
Jerks, titty who?
Central it's yoiks and
tally-ho, not jerks and titty who.
Yoiks yoiks, tally-ho.
This one's slightly
more stupid than some.
That's why she's having extra training.
Now watch her take this.
Fantastic!
Faultless landing.
I think she's hurt.
Central.
Number seven needs reactivating.
Reactivate immediately.
She's...
Better.
Very interesting.
Are they all like that?
That one's so
stupid she's almost human.
Must give you somebody to talk to you
When you wanna feel superior.
Please sir, can I have
this one to practise with.
Why don't she get
her riding right first.
Is there something wrong with him?
Has he been wrongly programmed?
Look here I really must protest.
This just isn't decent.
What about you Mr. drummond?
would you care to give us a little tuition
In the art of seduction?
Well now I'll have a try.
That's the way.
Just relax.
Arms around the neck, that's right.
I say, do remember you're British.
Got there at last drummond.
Mm.
well there has to be some
method of controlling them
Doesn't there.
but I must say I didn't
expect to find something
As simple as a switch.
Hardly simple Mr. drummond.
You've heard of artificial
legs, artificial hands.
Well my girls have artificial brains.
Surgically implanted, of course.
I've termed the operation robotizing,
for want of a better word.
Sorry sir.
I don't know what happened.
You passed out in the heat of passion.
once they've been fully
trained and programed
you won't be able to tell the
difference between my girls
And the common or garden variety.
Except of course that
they'll be under my control.
Those two have been
trained as weightlifters.
They think big.
yes but apart from giving
you somebody to live with
Who tolerates your nastiness,
what's the point of it all.
The point?
Eight million pounds Mr.
Drummond, that's the point.
A great deal of money.
Here we have the operations room.
Has this one had the treatment?
Your lovely spy?
No.
she's supervising the installation
of the booster mechanism
On my little toy.
Thanks to you for getting me the boat.
What does your little toy do?
The sst1.
That airfield's pretty well guarded now,
You won't get near it again.
I don't need to.
Pandora would you show Mr.
Drummond how the prototype works.
Mr. drummond, would you
put your glass down please.
Move a little back.
Hold it.
Infrasound.
So you've gone right off
explosives now have you.
Yes.
Unfortunately for pandora she
does so enjoy a good bang.
Will you offer Mr. drummond
another drink my dears.
Thank you.
- Black and white.
- With water.
- No ice.
- Quite correct.
We're ready Carl.
you see Mr. drummond,
until I could get hold of that boat
I couldn't quite work out how to employ
Pandora's little gadget
for long-range destruction.
but now, when the sst1 takes off tomorrow,
I turn on my projector
and the infrasonic waves
Will totally jam the supersonic
control system of the plane.
What do you want to do that for?
Eight million pounds.
That's my fee for when the
plane's contracts are cancelled.
And are we gonna see
this happen on your screen?
Oh yes.
Yes tomorrow morning.
That's the last thing
either of you will see.
After that I'm going to use it on you.
Were you spying on us?
No ma'am.
Mr. drummond said you
looked through the keyhole.
Did you?
No ma'am.
I switched her off.
Good.
Happy now?
Yes I don't like being watched.
Hey.
Do you have a light?
I only want a light.
Thank you.
I am like your last cigarette.
A special treat for the condemned.
Dangerous to smoke in bed you know.
That Helga is with him.
She could have you.
Oh yes?
She's so selfish that one.
I told her it was my turn.
Makes me so terribly cross.
Why don't you try me?
You are not like him.
Well you could pretend couldn't you.
No no I'm sorry.
But I promise you once
you know how it's very good.
Yes I'm sure.
But look are you sure you're not a robot.
Oh dear you want a robot?
- Yes.
- Why?
well you see I promised
my mother I wouldn't
But I mean if you were a robot
then that would be all right.
Wouldn't it?
But mummy will never know.
Oh I say.
Mummy never told me about this.
Control.
All numbers report to control.
Numbers return.
Must you be so rough darling.
Ooh I thought you'd never get here.
Who you double crossing this time?
I had to make contact.
Petersen's watching all the time.
All right.
Now you've got me what do you want?
CIA.
Cl who?
Washington thought you
needed looking after.
How sweet of them.
You must think I'm a
bigger fool than I look.
if you don't believe
me why did you come here
Instead of trying to swim for it.
Curiosity.
and the fact that the
nearest place to swim to
200 miles away.
I'm not that strong.
Look.
Petersen still trusts me.
Do you want my help or not?
Well how'd you get the
job in the first place?
You just call him up and ask.
Two years ago petersen needed
a girl who spoke Russian.
I do.
Suppressor's intact.
Only thing, no gas.
Yes they think of everything don't they.
Almost everything.
Yes.
if you shoot me I'll shoot
your fragile girlfriend,
And you wouldn't like that, would you.
For many reasons yes, I think I would.
Give me that gun or I'll shoot
the darling little traitor.
I wouldn't if I were you.
Drummond!
Drummond!
If baroness Helga had alerted control
Then we would've been
certain of his death.
All right.
Hello control.
Control.
Have they finished
searching the grounds yet?
Continue search.
Out.
Central, drummond is not in the kitchen.
Over there.
Sit down.
Number seven reporting.
No sign of drummond.
Out.
They've searched everywhere Carl.
My aim is still perfect.
I must've killed him.
What a pity.
I would've liked him
to have seen the show.
It's about to start at any minute.
Hello central.
Number seven reporting
from the kitchen area.
Drummond is not here.
Hello central.
Recall all units, seal
all doors immediately.
We're about to commence operations.
All numbers report to central.
Doors and windows sealed immediately.
Operation about to commence.
See you later handsome.
See you later handsome?
Helga would you get me a
shot of major Newman please.
Yes Carl.
Who's that?
The man who's going to pay me
When that lovely plane goes up in smoke.
There you are major Newman.
Your boys may be damn clever
But they'll never build a plane like that.
Eight million pounds.
It's not bad is it.
How monstrous!
rather depends on whose
side you're on dear chap,
doesn't it.
I mean talking about money like that.
Like a tradesmen.
Nearly ready Carl.
Now.
Do you see what's happening?
Their plane is supersonic,
our little toy is subsonic.
I've jammed their controls,
they can do nothing.
They will continue to climb
And no one will ever know what happened.
Stop it, stop it at once I say.
I think I owe myself this pleasure.
No don't.
I was only going to tickle him.
Have you gone mad?
Use this in here and you'll
jam the destructor, you fool.
Yes.
Turn it off petersen.
Ah come in, just in time.
They've almost gone into orbit.
I said turn it off.
Try and make me.
He can't use that, it'll jam
the destructor, he said so.
Keep that destructor going.
Yes.
Right.
I'm gonna walk up to you,
take that out of your hand,
and I'm gonna turn off your little toy.
Stop! Take another
step and I'll kill you.
You kill me,
I'm gonna blow your eight
million pounds old boy.
Hello central.
All numbers to report to
the rooftop immediately.
Let's go.
I don't think contracts for that plane
Will be cancelled after all.
Stop him!
Stop him!
Hello central.
Numbers one through six to eliminate
Numbers eight through
13, immediate and urgent.
And numbers eight through 13
To eliminate numbers one through
six, immediate and urgent.
Where's that little machine gotten to?
Upstairs, too dangerous
a toy for you and me.
- Oh but I thought if you...
- And central.
number seven to pick up the
infrasonic manual destructor
And dispose of it.
Orders confirmed.
Come on.
Female of the species carruthers.
Mr. drummond.
Hello number seven.
I thought central told you to
dispose of that horrid thing.
That's just what I'm doing.
Why don't you dispose
of it somewhere else, hmm?
Here.
Well thank you very much.
Let's see if this'll open
the boathouse, shall we.
Oh look look look, right here.
Oh good show.
Now you hold that.
Okay.
Please, please, please
be very very careful.
Then don't look.
Okay.
Ooh!
Oh!
Peregrine, that was fantastic!
Yes it was rather, wasn't it.
sorry Mr. drummond
But when you're playing
mata hari anything goes.
Not the CIA.
How surprising.
You couldn't possibly be working for
That Russian organisation could you?
How did you guess?
Now get away from the boat.
Are you Russian?
Oh sorry peregrine but
we don't have infrasound.
At least we didn't.
But that's marvellous,
why didn't you tell me.
Is just about the only thing I can do.
Speak Russian I mean.
Mr. drummond will you
tell his excellency please
I'm not defecting, just
taking leave of absence
To improve my Russian relations.
Come back!
Mummy will never forgive you!
Number seven?
Who are you working for?
Who do you think?
j some girls do satisfy you j
j but they'll all mystify you j
j they'll thrill you and some will do j
j anything you desire j
j there's no doubt about it j
j it's proved to be true j
j there is nothing in the world j
j that can do what some girls do j
to corrupt and destroy you j
j they'll take you and they'll break you j
j or they'll make you a king j
j they'll bring you the summer j
j when winter is due j
j tis truly j
j quite amazing the things
that some girls do j
senior aerodynamics engineer
Yes Mr. petersen.
Expecting turbulence are we?
No sir.
j some girls do satisfy you
but they'll all mystify you j
j they'll thrill you and some will do j
j anything you desire j
j there's no doubt about it j
j it's proved to be true j
j there is nothing in the world j
j that can do what some girls do j
Fuselage.
Yes Mr. petersen.
j but this is life, it's
all part of the game j
j trying to guess the unknown j
j they're just one route
to this glamorous game j
j it cannot be played alone j
Gee Mr. drummond that was fantastic.
Now for the engines.
Yes Mr. petersen.
The countdown continues from 85.
84.
83.
82.
81.
80.
79.
78.
There's someone at the door for you.
77.
76.
75.
74.
73.
72.
71.
70.
69.
68.
67.
66.
65.
64.
63.
62.
61.
60.
59.
58.
57.
56.
55.
54.
53.
52.
51.
50.
49.
48.
47.
46.
45.
43.
42.
41.
40.
35.
34.
33.
32.
31.
Oh!
Clumsy brute, look what you've done.
13, 12, 11, 10, 9.
It'll wash off.
7,6,5,4.
3, 2, 1.
There she blows!
And what a beaut!
Your drink sir.
Thank you.
Oh gee Mr. drummond.
Me having a drink with youl!
What is it?
Well pretty strong.
It's a bull shot.
Gosh!
Tastes like beef soup.
It is beef soup!
Is it?
Well a little of it is.
The rest's vodka.
Hello darling.
Wasn't it lovely?
Wow!
Did you do that Mr. drummond?
Do what?
The eye.
Good heavens no.
Don't do things like that to girls.
I bet they're both spies.
Well as a matter of fact
you're completely right.
You see the one, the one with the glasses.
She's Hungarian.
The eyes are disguised of course.
Ah yes!
Damn clever these Hungarians.
Wow!
Actually she's working for us now.
Because she's madly in love with you?
Well what do you think?
What does it feel like
to be a hero Mr. drummond?
Careful.
What?
That's my bad knee.
Oh.
No really Mr. drummond.
You are a hero.
why you caught that man that
killed the secretary of state
and then you went and
kidnapped all those tanks,
And then you caught that other man...
Ssh.
More Hungarians.
Oh, oh I'm sorry Mr. drummond.
But gee, if ever you need
a girl Friday I'll do it.
Well now's your chance.
Me?
Mr. drummond's holiday office speaking.
Mr. drummond's secretary.
Oh.
Oh I'm sorry.
It's your secretary.
Hello miss crumb.
Miss crumb!
What?
The sst1?
When?
Right, I'll be there as soon as possible.
You have to go home?
When you gotta go you gotta go.
Oh!
Mr. drummond?
Do I look like Mr. drummond?
Where is he?
Who are you?
I'm his daily, who are you.
Miss Mary.
You?
I'm a cookery school.
Oh.
Have you got a light?
I don't approve of smoking,
it ruins the taste buds.
Where is Mr. drummond?
Is it important?
Yes it is.
You have to stand
still for it to go away.
You can tell me if you like.
I'm his confidential daily.
When are you expecting him back?
I'm not, he's gone on holiday.
Why didn't you say
so, when did he leave?
Two days ago.
He went for a fortnight.
Changed his mind though,
he's coming back today.
Oh.
In that case I'll just leave him a note.
will you be sure to see that he gets this
as soon as he gets back?
Thank you.
It's your greatest
aeroplane ever Mr. Mortimer.
In fact I think it's
the greatest ever built.
We know the prime minister
wants you to have a knighthood.
Oh congratulations!
yes but unfortunately I'm
afraid it isn't possible,
Not yet, the home office.
Well what have they to
do with aircraft designs?
Itisn't that it's, they
say you're breaking the law.
Well indeed, do they.
well I can assure you sir that
I have never broken the law
to my knowledge.
Well you're classified old
chap, and so is your briefcase.
Official secrets act.
Well I've always been of the opinion
that my secrets are safer in the custody
Of someone who knows and
understands them, me.
ah but if somebody kidnaps you
And your notes are with you...
Now look here sir Dudley,
I mean Mr. Mortimer.
With that briefcase under your arm
You're in danger with every step you take.
Now look old chap we haven't told you
But there's been a couple
of accidents recently.
We were getting worried about
anything happening to you.
so we've been trying to insure you
For five million pounds.
only we can't get anyone
willing to accept the risk,
Not while you walk around
with that briefcase.
Five million?
Well you're worth it,
we couldn't replace you.
I was thinking it's not very much.
Well all right.
Good day gentlemen.
Oh sorry.
Now this must be locked away
sir, that's very important.
What about that?
It's welded sir, for safety.
Good day gentlemen.
He's right you know, he
is worth more than that.
Pandora!
Sir Dudley Mortimer.
Lord Mortimer.
Is something wrong?
Did you have a breakdown?
Did you have a puncture?
Maybe he ran out of water.
Oh yes.
My dear young lady,
Even I know that water
does not drive a car.
Oh look!
Here.
Look.
Oh petroleum.
Oh poor little man, what will you do.
Oh don't worry we'll tow you, won't we.
- I don't want a tow!
- Get the rope pandora.
- I will not be towed!
- It's all right.
No I'm gonna push.
I'm gonna push.
Take the handbrake off will you.
Put that rope away.
Put it away I say.
No stop, stop.
I'm perfectly capable
of managing this myself.
In you go little man.
We take care of you.
Stop, stop!
Stop how dare you!
Stop it, stop!
I'll have the law on you two young ladies!
Stop, how dare you!
Stop I say!
Stop!
Bye bye!
Drive carefully Mr. Mortimer.
Pull
damn!
Well Hugh, what do you make of it.
Well it ought to be
too late for sabotage.
the prototype's been built, it flies
And the contract's been signed.
Pull!
Good shot.
but they can still cancel the contract
until the end of next month.
Pull
that's funny.
Somebody's shooting my clays.
Yes old chap, you are.
You know if this news gets about.
Hey you shooting at my birds?
No, aren't you?
Pull.
great Scott, I think that's
the most amazing bit of
Trick shooting I've ever seen.
Hello there please.
It is baroness Helga is it not.
look Hugh, if this contract's cancelled
the country stands to lose
A thousand million pounds in exports.
You've got to do something about it.
I'll do my best.
- Ah my dear thorensen.
- Lord dunburry.
May I present major Newman,
major Newman lord dunburry.
And?
Oh Hugh drummond, I thought you'd met.
The Hugh drummond?
Well.
We should have met sooner.
On business, but this is much nicer.
Business?
You insure some of my aeroplanes.
One of them has just crashed.
I think you
owe me an apology madam.
But your friend had missed.
I hoped to save you the shame.
Oh my dear girl.
Mr. drummond's a better
shot even than you.
I'm the duffer.
Better shot than me I doubt.
But we could see.
You will come and visit
me soon Mr. drummond.
Thorensen experimental aerodynamics.
Dunburry will tell you.
Right, I'll be down tomorrow.
Thorensen?
Oh they're gliders, sail planes.
They've done some research for us.
They're a good firm, not very big.
Something crashed?
Oh just one of his gliders.
not very important, not one of his,
Well I'll see you there perhaps.
Bye.
You are a good shot.
I'm also a good cook.
That is our dinner.
Fresh?
Pheasants are supposed to
be hung for a week you know.
I'm a very good cook.
You'll never know they were fresh.
Well, why?
Why what?
Why sit halfway up a
tree, middle of surrey,
shooting at my Clay pigeons,
In order to come back here
and go to bed with me.
I wanted to see how
good a shot you were.
And?
Better than most men.
And what's the end
product supposed to be?
Must there be one.
well shooting often ends up
In somebody getting killed you know.
Would you mind?
Packing?
All right.
Thank you.
Hello.
Flicky?
You forget your ski.
Flicky.
Flicky. - Wow!
I bet they're a pushover
once you get 'em up here.
Now flicky listen to me.
I don't want to seem inhospitable but...
Well don't I even get a drink?
Champagne or beef soup.
A bull shot.
Over there.
I'll make one.
Eh flicky, how long were
you thinking of staying.
In London that is.
Until my aunt's better.
Your aunt?
Yes.
She broke her leg.
Isn't that marvellous!
well you see there's no
one to take care of her
Except for me.
That's why I'm here.
but she won't need me all the time so
I can be free to help you too.
Yes.
Who's Angela?
My daily.
Oh.
Well she left a note for you.
It says Mr. drummond.
Ssh.
Telephone.
Oh.
You have company.
Why didn't you say something?
Oh flicky.
Ah, the bedroom.
My bed.
She's off the phone now.
Gosh.
She was in a hurry.
What do we do now?
Flicky.
That's a silly question isn't it.
I mean first thing we
do is take your coat off
And then we draw a bath, and...
- Mr. drummond I, I...
- What do you like
For breakfast in the morning?
My, my aunt she may
be waiting up for me.
I think I better call her.
Flicky, flicky.
For a femme fatale you make
a damn good ski instructor.
Your aunt doesn't exist does she.
Mayfair 8860 then.
What's that?
Claridge's.
Claridge's hotel, good evening.
Hey.
Put your finger on there,
don't let go till I tell you.
Ah.
What is it?
A plastic explosive.
enough to blow the whole
place to smithereens
And you and me with it.
It's all right, it's quite
safe, you can let go now.
You see she replaced the
telephone mic with that.
One word in here and poof.
After you.
Hello, hello Mr. drummond.
Bang!
One, two, three, crack.
Well done major Newman, right in the bowl.
So sorry dear lady.
Relax the egg, wing
commander, relax the egg.
Now then come along, all together then.
One, two, three, relax, crack.
That's it.
Oh dear, we'll have to do
better than that Mr. thorensen.
I will try miss Mary.
Little egg behind the ear.
Thank you dear lady.
Sir!
Why don't you watch major
Newman, he does it so well.
Show him major Newman.
There, now you try.
Oh dear, time to stop.
Never mind, tomorrow we'll start whipping.
whipping our golden sweet
nature nurtured eggs
Into a lovely creamy froth.
I can't wait!
but for the moment back
to our responsibilities
And don't forget my aprons.
you will do your homework
won't you Mr. thorensen
well done major.
A special diploma for you my boy.
Thank you.
11 o'clock tomorrow then.
Goodnight.
Bless you bishop.
Kills the taste buds.
A merciful death.
Hello dear little man.
Miss Mary?
Miss Mary?
All right you can come out now.
What the hell are you doing here?
Well the note your
cleaning lady left you.
So you decided to play
private eye did you?
But I just got here as you drove up.
Well let's see if
she's upstairs shall we.
Hey, why a cookery school?
well firstly 500 guineas a course,
secondly it's a good front
and it provides the sort of clients
That it pays to inform on.
Ooh.
Who's been after what?
Yes and I don't know.
the only thing likely to
interest a thief around here
would be nasty gossip.
Maybe, maybe they're
after his diary then.
maybe you're right
But I don't think miss
Mary's that obvious.
All the same, you could
be on the right track.
Well what do you make of this, hmm.
Look here.
Wing commander Aston's Christmas party.
Strip poker before...
Yeah I don't think that's
very suitable for you.
And the boat.
Doesn't mean anything to me.
Doesn't say anything
about my baroness either.
Or the sst1.
That's what you mean.
Clever little thing aren't you.
Shut up!
That's miss Mary.
Yeah still warm.
His friends must've
been here very recently.
What do you make of that?
H d Tor gl dang.
What?
I think it's a warning
of some kind flicky.
That gliding's a bit dangerous.
Thank you.
You have looked through the
parachute yourself my dear.
Mr. drummond is far too valuable to lose.
Oh yes sir.
I packed it myself.
You say it broke up in
the air Mr. thorensen.
My experts tell me so.
Though somebody had beaten it
with a club as it was flying.
One would need a very big
club to smash that, eh.
Well we shall have to see what happens.
Good luck Mr. drummond.
Release at 4000 feet sir.
All right.
You are out of sight now darling.
Thank you!
He's releasing now.
Drummond sail plane to control.
Drummond sail plane to tower.
Hello drummond sail
plane, come in please.
He's broken off.
There he goes!
Oh poor lamb.
do you know, I think
someone cut the rip cord
of his parachute.
He's trying to open it by hand.
How much longer?
Oh seconds.
Hugh drummond, you have the
worst stiff neck I ever see.
Yeah you can say that again.
You can do that again.
Tell me what did you
find out about thorensen?
Thorensen?
He's come to the sauna, I give
him a massage, he goes home.
Sometimes I don't see him for weeks.
And when he's not in england
he's in north Africa.
North Africa?
Didn't mention a man
called barouche did he?
Barouche, barouche,
he talks about barouche.
He meets him too in north Africa.
And something about a boat.
Osprey 111?
Yes that's it.
A very fast boat he said.
He mentioned somebody
else called Carl petersen.
Petersen?
Is that any help??
Birgit.
I absolutely adore you.
- You do?
- Mm hmm.
And now I've got to rush off.
You sure you love me so?
Well I can't prove it in
front of the natives can I.
You're next major Newman.
Hello.
Tell him I'll be down in a minute.
Yes?
Boo!
Boo.
It's me!
I know it's you.
How do you know it's me?
You didn't even look.
How do you like my dress?
Just the thing for
following me around in.
Mm, I thought so.
Where we dining?
We aren't dining anywhere.
I've made other arrangements.
Aw shucks.
You must admit it was a good idea though.
I was even on the same plane with you
and you didn't spot me.
Well how could I?
You've got a black wig
and dark glasses on.
Now if you'll excuse me
I've got to rush off.
Help yourself.
Flicky.
Yes?
You know everybody's
got a home somewhere.
Why don't you go to yours, mm?
There's a good girl.
I can't, it's too far away.
Flicky.
I'm hungry.
Well try the hotel
restaurant, excellent.
I want to go out.
Go to the kasbah.
With you?
there's a restaurant there
where the sheep's eyes are
A richly rewarding experience.
Sheep's eyes?
Yuck.
Ah Mr. drummond.
How do you do.
You from the British embassy?
oh yes I hope I won't shock you old chap
But you'll find me a bit
of a fallout you know.
This way please.
I think you mean dropout.
Do I?
Oh yes, so I do.
my name's carruthers by the
way, peregrine carruthers,
but you can call me butch.
That yours?
Yes, super isn't she.
Positively psychedelic.
Oh I hope you're safe.
That's what mother keeps worrying about.
Who cares Mr. drummond, get with it.
Live dangerously.
What does his excellency
think about your swinging image?
I don't know, he doesn't say.
Wonder why not.
He's mummy's brother.
Here's your invitation.
Lord dunburry laid it on.
It's a pre-race party.
Pre-race, what for?
Powerboats.
International gold cup tomorrow.
Who's lady manderley?
Oh ex patriot society type.
Always in the cheap press.
Yachts, the riviera, money to burn.
Last time it was a harem party.
Great fun.
Come as your favourite eunuch.
I'm glad it was last time,
I feel a bit overdressed.
Barouche be there?
Oh I can't say old chap.
Where do you fit in?
Me?
Oh I've been assigned as your bodyguard.
Good grief.
Look out!
When will they learn
to drive on the left?
Madge!
Glad you could make it.
Lovely sweet.
Darling, darling get me a drink will you.
Isn't he sweet.
Cecil.
Who's the contact butch?
No idea old chap, I presume
they'll reveal themselves.
By the look of some of these
dresses it won't be long now.
Yes I see what you mean.
Oh well I'll be around
if you need any protection.
Thank you butch.
Mr. drummond?
Yes.
Reggie!
This is divine.
You always make a party go so.
Mr. drummond.
Oh yes, of course.
Reggie come here at once!
Cool baby!
Good evening Mr. drummond.
Sorry to have kept you waiting.
Forgive the uproar out there.
My parties suit my purpose.
People think I'm a fool and
they talk and talk and talk.
Now Mr. barouche.
dunburry put an urgent on it
And I'm afraid we haven't
been able to do much.
Very nice.
Mysterious person barouche.
But you'll see for yourself.
He's definitely coming here tonight.
Who's kruger?
Built this boat.
Osprey lll.
Mm hmm.
He's expected to win
the gold cup tomorrow.
What's his connection with barouche?
We're not sure.
except at one of my parties
kruger boasted he could take
barouche for half a million
if he wanted to.
Something about barouche
buying the osprey.
Half a million.
That's an awful lot of money for a boat.
Could he have been buying
anything else as well?
Possibly.
you see kruger's father was a scientist
Doing advanced work on infrasound.
He died last year.
Police think it was murder.
There was no proof.
Infrasound.
What's that?
Subsonic vibrations.
You can't hear it but it's there.
It can destroy life very quickly.
kruger's father was trying to find out
How to control and direct it.
What's thorensen got
to do with all of this?
We've drawn a blank there.
Oh except that thorensen often
flies down to meet barouche.
Yes?
Thank you.
Barouche has just arrived.
Darling you look gorgeous!
Angel fetch me a drink.
My own party and I'm dying of thirst.
Over there.
Darling man, I'm honoured.
My sheikh of the desert.
So exciting!
So mysterious!
Oh you must meet Mr. drummond.
He's just popped down
from London for the race.
Ah drummond.
Your reputation proceeds you.
Insurance isn't it?
That's correct.
We must have a lot of
things in common Mr. drummond.
Love for the subdued for example.
Lady manderley's parties...
Good evening Mr. drummond.
Surprise surprise.
Your aim's gone to pot baroness.
My aim is perfect.
Dead centre.
Just that you drilled the wrong heart.
Oh don't be so egocentric darling.
You're not the only interest I have.
Oh you mustn't say things like that.
You'll make me jealous.
That's a grunig Mark six.
Special Swedish target pistol.
Virtually guarantees you a bullseye.
Only one problem.
Fires just one shot at a time.
But I might've reloaded.
I'll take a chance on that.
I won't!
You see it was loaded after all.
To you Mr. drummond.
- What?
- Hello mr kruger.
What do you want?
I've told your boss already
we've done our bit of business
and that's that.
He didn't get everything.
He didn't get the boat.
That's his tough luck huh.
But he wants it.
Not a chance baby, now scram.
What's that?
That's little pandora's box.
Is this kruger's boat house?
Yes he's over there.
Silly Mr. kruger.
Is he dead?
That's strange.
Not a Mark on him.
Just like miss Mary.
Well thank heavens he's not British.
Well he's not my responsibility you see.
Why kill him though?
What's so important about a boat?
Sound waves, could that be it.
What do you mean?
Well young kruger there
Was always talking about sound waves.
Powdered glass.
Of course.
Infrasound.
That's it.
That's what he was always going
on about, infrasound, yes.
Wonder if there's some
emergency lighting here.
Yes.
What was that?
That's infrasonic sound.
Directed down through
these holes in the hull.
Breaks up the water friction.
Makes the boat slide faster.
And hey presto, you've won the race.
No wonder he was bumped off.
There's no need to murder
a man to stop him cheating.
All you've gotta do is to report
him to the race committee.
But what makes you so sure
that he will come himself?
I know him.
He will.
Look for him.
Will all competitors
for the international gold cup
Proceed to the start buoy.
Oh look, there!
Yes.
Put 'em down.
I say it's terribly
exciting playing decoy.
I feel just like one
of those stuffed ducks.
Five seconds to go.
Four, three, two, one.
I say!
Do you think we could stop for a moment?
Didn't you say live dangerously butch?
Yes.
Well live dangerously.
They're trying to cut us off.
They've switched on the Sonic.
Tear gas!
Go on, you go there.
Drive.
Baroness Helga.
Five o'clock, one mile.
Estimated time of arrival, three minutes.
Received, central out.
Is this what you're after?
Don't touch it.
Turn it off!
Slow down or I'll shoot.
If you shoot me we'll
never stop in time.
You look a mess.
Well.
Not really used to roughing it baroness.
It won't be for long.
And it's a comfortable place to die.
Ooh!
Do you mind?
- Move.
- Hmm.
Cosy little place. - Come on.
Come on, move.
You wait here.
Two against one Mr. drummond.
We don't wanna miss the
manager though, do we.
A drink sir.
Black and white with water please.
Black and white.
And water.
No ice.
- No ice.
- Right away sir.
And you sir?
Nothing.
Nothing for me thank you.
Black and white.
And water.
Thank you.
This way please.
Hmm not bad.
Little less water next time.
Oh dear, that reminds me,
His excellency's expecting us for dinner.
My dear carruthers.
Don't be alarmed.
Ah Mr. drummond.
How very nice of you to come.
Thank you ladies.
You're not barouche at all,
You're thorensen aren't you.
Oh no no, he's barouche.
I saw him shot.
Thorensen.
The killing of barouche was a necessity.
There was too much curiosity.
A coup de theatre, my dear sir.
Would you care for something
to drink Mr. drummond?
It's inevitable I suppose.
This desire to disguise yourself.
What do you mean?
the whole civilised
world finds Carl petersen
totally repulsive.
You seem to have reached
the same conclusion.
Who is this Carl petersen?
You are.
I can smell you.
You think you're so damn
clever don't you drummond.
But I'll show you.
I'll show you.
This, this island on the
crossroads of the mediterranean.
From here I will control the
whole destiny of the world.
Ridiculous you can't even
control your own temper.
Come on carruthers.
Mustn't keep he waiting
any longer must we.
Don't move Mr. drummond.
Drop it.
Hello flicky.
I wondered what had happened to you.
I missed you.
I shan't miss you.
So very slowly back down there.
And we're all changed for dinner.
Shall we gentlemen?
Shall we?
Yes.
The telegram you were expecting Carl.
Thank you my dear.
How do you like the clothes
We provided for you Mr. drummond?
Excellent, they
might've been made for me.
They were my dear fellow.
They were.
History repeats itself.
Napoleon dreamt of the entire universe
Thronging to his door.
Now I shall fulfil his dreams.
Dressed as the Duke of Wellington?
Well of course my dear fellow.
Never back a loser.
What's a nice girl like you
doing in a dump like this?
never, not even in england,
have I ever come across a hotel
Where the service met
with my satisfaction.
So I built and staffed my own.
pandora, I'm sure you'd prefer something
A trifle more exotic,
wouldn't you my dear.
You know my taste.
And what about you flicky,
with your sweet tooth.
I think she deserves a little reward
For having looked after you
so nicely, don't you think.
I thought working for
you was its own reward.
I can't eat that stuff.
Why don't you give it to pandora?
Do you think you should darling?
It's terribly bad for the complexion.
I have a perfect complexion.
see Mr. drummond, to get perfect service
One needs total single-mindedness.
Thank you sir.
See what I mean.
Ordinary servant would've
panicked, started to scream.
Not my girls.
Hello central.
Ready for number nine.
Thank you
control, message received.
Number seven please.
They'll drown!
Help!
I can't swim
Remarkable girls
aren't they Mr. drummond.
You'll see that in training.
I wonder what for.
Control Mr. drummond.
Perfect control.
These girls can do anything.
Jerks jerks, titty who.
Jerks, titty who?
Central it's yoiks and
tally-ho, not jerks and titty who.
Yoiks yoiks, tally-ho.
This one's slightly
more stupid than some.
That's why she's having extra training.
Now watch her take this.
Fantastic!
Faultless landing.
I think she's hurt.
Central.
Number seven needs reactivating.
Reactivate immediately.
She's...
Better.
Very interesting.
Are they all like that?
That one's so
stupid she's almost human.
Must give you somebody to talk to you
When you wanna feel superior.
Please sir, can I have
this one to practise with.
Why don't she get
her riding right first.
Is there something wrong with him?
Has he been wrongly programmed?
Look here I really must protest.
This just isn't decent.
What about you Mr. drummond?
would you care to give us a little tuition
In the art of seduction?
Well now I'll have a try.
That's the way.
Just relax.
Arms around the neck, that's right.
I say, do remember you're British.
Got there at last drummond.
Mm.
well there has to be some
method of controlling them
Doesn't there.
but I must say I didn't
expect to find something
As simple as a switch.
Hardly simple Mr. drummond.
You've heard of artificial
legs, artificial hands.
Well my girls have artificial brains.
Surgically implanted, of course.
I've termed the operation robotizing,
for want of a better word.
Sorry sir.
I don't know what happened.
You passed out in the heat of passion.
once they've been fully
trained and programed
you won't be able to tell the
difference between my girls
And the common or garden variety.
Except of course that
they'll be under my control.
Those two have been
trained as weightlifters.
They think big.
yes but apart from giving
you somebody to live with
Who tolerates your nastiness,
what's the point of it all.
The point?
Eight million pounds Mr.
Drummond, that's the point.
A great deal of money.
Here we have the operations room.
Has this one had the treatment?
Your lovely spy?
No.
she's supervising the installation
of the booster mechanism
On my little toy.
Thanks to you for getting me the boat.
What does your little toy do?
The sst1.
That airfield's pretty well guarded now,
You won't get near it again.
I don't need to.
Pandora would you show Mr.
Drummond how the prototype works.
Mr. drummond, would you
put your glass down please.
Move a little back.
Hold it.
Infrasound.
So you've gone right off
explosives now have you.
Yes.
Unfortunately for pandora she
does so enjoy a good bang.
Will you offer Mr. drummond
another drink my dears.
Thank you.
- Black and white.
- With water.
- No ice.
- Quite correct.
We're ready Carl.
you see Mr. drummond,
until I could get hold of that boat
I couldn't quite work out how to employ
Pandora's little gadget
for long-range destruction.
but now, when the sst1 takes off tomorrow,
I turn on my projector
and the infrasonic waves
Will totally jam the supersonic
control system of the plane.
What do you want to do that for?
Eight million pounds.
That's my fee for when the
plane's contracts are cancelled.
And are we gonna see
this happen on your screen?
Oh yes.
Yes tomorrow morning.
That's the last thing
either of you will see.
After that I'm going to use it on you.
Were you spying on us?
No ma'am.
Mr. drummond said you
looked through the keyhole.
Did you?
No ma'am.
I switched her off.
Good.
Happy now?
Yes I don't like being watched.
Hey.
Do you have a light?
I only want a light.
Thank you.
I am like your last cigarette.
A special treat for the condemned.
Dangerous to smoke in bed you know.
That Helga is with him.
She could have you.
Oh yes?
She's so selfish that one.
I told her it was my turn.
Makes me so terribly cross.
Why don't you try me?
You are not like him.
Well you could pretend couldn't you.
No no I'm sorry.
But I promise you once
you know how it's very good.
Yes I'm sure.
But look are you sure you're not a robot.
Oh dear you want a robot?
- Yes.
- Why?
well you see I promised
my mother I wouldn't
But I mean if you were a robot
then that would be all right.
Wouldn't it?
But mummy will never know.
Oh I say.
Mummy never told me about this.
Control.
All numbers report to control.
Numbers return.
Must you be so rough darling.
Ooh I thought you'd never get here.
Who you double crossing this time?
I had to make contact.
Petersen's watching all the time.
All right.
Now you've got me what do you want?
CIA.
Cl who?
Washington thought you
needed looking after.
How sweet of them.
You must think I'm a
bigger fool than I look.
if you don't believe
me why did you come here
Instead of trying to swim for it.
Curiosity.
and the fact that the
nearest place to swim to
200 miles away.
I'm not that strong.
Look.
Petersen still trusts me.
Do you want my help or not?
Well how'd you get the
job in the first place?
You just call him up and ask.
Two years ago petersen needed
a girl who spoke Russian.
I do.
Suppressor's intact.
Only thing, no gas.
Yes they think of everything don't they.
Almost everything.
Yes.
if you shoot me I'll shoot
your fragile girlfriend,
And you wouldn't like that, would you.
For many reasons yes, I think I would.
Give me that gun or I'll shoot
the darling little traitor.
I wouldn't if I were you.
Drummond!
Drummond!
If baroness Helga had alerted control
Then we would've been
certain of his death.
All right.
Hello control.
Control.
Have they finished
searching the grounds yet?
Continue search.
Out.
Central, drummond is not in the kitchen.
Over there.
Sit down.
Number seven reporting.
No sign of drummond.
Out.
They've searched everywhere Carl.
My aim is still perfect.
I must've killed him.
What a pity.
I would've liked him
to have seen the show.
It's about to start at any minute.
Hello central.
Number seven reporting
from the kitchen area.
Drummond is not here.
Hello central.
Recall all units, seal
all doors immediately.
We're about to commence operations.
All numbers report to central.
Doors and windows sealed immediately.
Operation about to commence.
See you later handsome.
See you later handsome?
Helga would you get me a
shot of major Newman please.
Yes Carl.
Who's that?
The man who's going to pay me
When that lovely plane goes up in smoke.
There you are major Newman.
Your boys may be damn clever
But they'll never build a plane like that.
Eight million pounds.
It's not bad is it.
How monstrous!
rather depends on whose
side you're on dear chap,
doesn't it.
I mean talking about money like that.
Like a tradesmen.
Nearly ready Carl.
Now.
Do you see what's happening?
Their plane is supersonic,
our little toy is subsonic.
I've jammed their controls,
they can do nothing.
They will continue to climb
And no one will ever know what happened.
Stop it, stop it at once I say.
I think I owe myself this pleasure.
No don't.
I was only going to tickle him.
Have you gone mad?
Use this in here and you'll
jam the destructor, you fool.
Yes.
Turn it off petersen.
Ah come in, just in time.
They've almost gone into orbit.
I said turn it off.
Try and make me.
He can't use that, it'll jam
the destructor, he said so.
Keep that destructor going.
Yes.
Right.
I'm gonna walk up to you,
take that out of your hand,
and I'm gonna turn off your little toy.
Stop! Take another
step and I'll kill you.
You kill me,
I'm gonna blow your eight
million pounds old boy.
Hello central.
All numbers to report to
the rooftop immediately.
Let's go.
I don't think contracts for that plane
Will be cancelled after all.
Stop him!
Stop him!
Hello central.
Numbers one through six to eliminate
Numbers eight through
13, immediate and urgent.
And numbers eight through 13
To eliminate numbers one through
six, immediate and urgent.
Where's that little machine gotten to?
Upstairs, too dangerous
a toy for you and me.
- Oh but I thought if you...
- And central.
number seven to pick up the
infrasonic manual destructor
And dispose of it.
Orders confirmed.
Come on.
Female of the species carruthers.
Mr. drummond.
Hello number seven.
I thought central told you to
dispose of that horrid thing.
That's just what I'm doing.
Why don't you dispose
of it somewhere else, hmm?
Here.
Well thank you very much.
Let's see if this'll open
the boathouse, shall we.
Oh look look look, right here.
Oh good show.
Now you hold that.
Okay.
Please, please, please
be very very careful.
Then don't look.
Okay.
Ooh!
Oh!
Peregrine, that was fantastic!
Yes it was rather, wasn't it.
sorry Mr. drummond
But when you're playing
mata hari anything goes.
Not the CIA.
How surprising.
You couldn't possibly be working for
That Russian organisation could you?
How did you guess?
Now get away from the boat.
Are you Russian?
Oh sorry peregrine but
we don't have infrasound.
At least we didn't.
But that's marvellous,
why didn't you tell me.
Is just about the only thing I can do.
Speak Russian I mean.
Mr. drummond will you
tell his excellency please
I'm not defecting, just
taking leave of absence
To improve my Russian relations.
Come back!
Mummy will never forgive you!
Number seven?
Who are you working for?
Who do you think?
j some girls do satisfy you j
j but they'll all mystify you j
j they'll thrill you and some will do j
j anything you desire j
j there's no doubt about it j
j it's proved to be true j
j there is nothing in the world j
j that can do what some girls do j