Serendipity (2001) - full transcript

Merry Christmas.

Excuse me.

- Whoo!
- I'm sorry.

- Sorry.
- Uh...

Do... Do you want these?

- You go ahead.
- No, please.

It's the last one.

Uh, miss, do you have another pair
of these black cashmere gloves?

Whatever's out is what we have.

You don't have a stockroom?

- No.
- Or a basement?



No. We don't have an attic, either.

Um, listen, you take 'em.
I don't need 'em.

No, no, no.
You saw them first. I...

Please. I insist.

I mean, here. Take 'em.

- Oh, oh!
Hey, wait a minute.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Hey!

- Excuse me, sir.
- Yeah?

- These are ours.
- Oh. Your gloves?

- Yes.
- Well, how come? I mean...

They're just sort of hanging there,
sleeping with their little price tag on.

We were just discussing them, all right?
This is, uh...

Well, I have news for you.

You can go on discussing them
long after I've paid for them.



Calm down, all right?
Just calm down.

Calm down?
It's five days before Christmas.

I'm in the middle of a New York
department store.

He's asking me to calm down.

Well, listen. These were meant to be
a very special gift for someone.

Yeah, we've put quite a lot
of thought into those.

- Ah.
- Isn't that right?

Who are you?
And who were they for?

- My boyfriend.
- My girlfriend.

- Her boyfriend.
- His girlfriend.

- His girlfriend.
- Her boyfriend.

One pair of gloves for two people?

- This is hard to explain.
- Well, try.

All right. Go ahead.

Oh. Uh, well, he is at the present time
my boyfriend.

But in 18 months...

after the operation...

- he will be...
- she will be...

...my girlfriend.
Do you understand?

That didn't really work out.

- No, but Merry Christmas anyway.
- Thank you very much.

All right.

Well, you earned these.
That was quick on your feet.

- Thanks. It was a team effort.
- Yeah, it was. It was.

- I don't know how to thank you.
- Well...

Ah, well.

They're ready for you guys.

Thank you.

I don't know if what you said to that guy
makes any sense.

It was helpful. I think we scared
the bejesus out of him.

Oh, you were pretty fierce.

This will work, though.
This is quite a coffee.

No, but I'm serious about the check.

It's the least I can do.

Well, thank you, but, see,

now I have to go find something else
for my girlfriend.

- Oh, they were for your girlfriend.
- Yes, they were.

Oh, I can't accept them then.

Well, you have to.
Otherwise you won't treat.

Really.

Let me tell you something.
This is the ultimate blended drink.

Where did you find this place?

I first came in because of the name.

- Hmm.
- Serendipity.

- It's one of my favorite words.
- It is?

- Uh-huh.
- Why?

'Cause it's such a nice sound
for what it means:

A fortunate accident.

- Mm.
- Except I don't really believe in accidents.

I think fate's behind everything.

Oh, you do?

- Yeah.
- Fate's behind everything?

Well, I think so.

Everything's predestined?
We don't have any choice at all?

No, I think we make our own decisions.

I just think that fate sends us
little signs,

and it's how we read the signs

that determines whether
we're happy or not.

Little signals.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

Fortunate accidents.
Lucky discoveries.

Like Columbus and America.

Yeah, or Fleming discovering...

...penicillin.
- Penicillin. Yeah.

- Fleming is his name?
- Yes.

Or "Jonathan and the Gloves."

I don't know that one.

You don't know that story?
It's an old folk tale. Classic.

Our hero, Jonathan, goes out
in search of black gloves.

And in a perfect act of
serendipiocity

or serendipaciousness,

he runs into a beautiful,
attractive English girl

with a boyfriend.

You have a boyfriend, right?

- Yeah, I do.
- That's what I thought.

And you have the glove lady.

Yes, I do.

- Mm-hmm.
- It was a very nice time.

Well, I hope you enjoy the gloves
you bought yourself.

Oh, I'm sure I will.

I usually appreciate
my own thoughtfulness.

What do you want for Christmas?

- Golf clubs.
- Oh.

So you're gonna meet
your boyfriend now or what?

No, I think he's probably out
doing what you're doing.

Getting a crush on
someone else's girlfriend?

No, I'm sorry. I just meant to say
that I had a really great time, and...

Um... you know, maybe you should
give me your phone number,

you know, just in case.

- In case of what?
- You know, in case of life.

I just had a great time,
and I'd never be able to find you again.

Well, if we're meant
to meet again, then...

we'll meet again.

It's just not the right time now.

Maybe we were supposed
to meet on British time

and we're five hours too early.

Come on.
I don't even know your name.

My name is Jonathan.

Does that make you
wanna tell me something?

Yeah, it does.

Merry Christmas, Jonathan.
And thanks.

That's it?!

Oh, Jesus, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry about that.

I think I left a scarf.

No. Nothing down here.
Why don't you go upstairs?

- Maybe it's still there.
- Thank you.

Hey.

Let's go do something.

All right.
What you wanna do?

I don't care.

All right. Come on.

Now, promise me you're not just
visiting here for a week

or marrying somebody
to get a green card or...

on parole.

None of the above. You?

No, no, no. Proud U.S. Citizen.
No criminal record.

So you won't tell me your name.
Well, tell me, uh...

what do you miss most
about Mother England?

I miss my mom terribly.

If I were her,
I'd miss you too.

Okay. Favorite movie.

The correct answer is
Cool Hand Luke.

I've never seen it.

Oh, come on.
You've never seen Cool Hand Luke?

Paul Newman?
Oh, my God. Come on!

"Failure to communicate,"
sadistic cop in sunglasses with no name.

Reminds me of you in that way.

Um, favorite New York moment.

This one's climbing the charts.

I'm flattered.

Is there anything else you need
to know about me?

Huh.

Favorite sexual position?

Oh!

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

Yeah, yeah.
That's my favorite too.

- You all right?
- Yeah.

- Did you hurt yourself?
- No.

- Yes, a little.
- You did?

- Ouch.
- Oh, let's take a look at that.

Oh, Jesus. Wow.

- That's a deep, deep gash.
- Gaping.

What?

Well, we'll fix that right up.

There you go.

What?

Oh, you're looking at my freckles?

It's the curse of the English, I'm afraid.

- Fair skin and bad teeth.
- No, you have great teeth.

Those aren't just freckles.

If you look closely,
you can see Cassiopeia.

- What?
- Right there.

Hold on a minute.

Okay.

All right.
Here's the story:

A long time ago in Ethiopia,

there was this queen
named Cassiopeia,

who thought she was the most
beautiful woman in the entire world,

and there wasn't anybody in the kingdom
who wasn't offended

by this woman's relentless vanity.

And then one day, she really
screwed up and offended the gods.

I don't remember what she did

and I don't remember
who she offended.

But it was bad.
She crossed the line.

But anyway,
Poseidon, the sea god,

punished Cassiopeia
by placing her in the heavens

upside down in her throne,

stuck for eternity with her skirt
around her shoulders,

and all the blood rushing to her head.

And now she's just
a constellation in the sky,

a bunch of English freckles
in the shape of a throne.

So she made one tragic mistake.

And paid for eternity.

Correct.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Legible, legible.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

Now, please, please.
Let fate take its proper course.

Oh! Oh!

That was an accident.
Write down that again, please.

I can't.
That was a sign.

Fate's telling us to back off.

If fate didn't want us to be together,

then why did we meet tonight, huh?
Gotcha.

Well, I don't know, but it's not
an exact science. It's a feeling.

Well, what if you're wrong, huh?

What if it's all in our hands
and we just walk away?

No names, no phone numbers,
nothing.

What do you think's gonna happen?

Do you think good old fate
is just gonna deliver my information

right to your doorstep?

Do you know that's the best idea
you've had all night?

- What's the best...
- Here you go.

Write your name and number down.

- On a $5.00 bill?
- Mm. Just do it.

You are a strange
and interesting woman.

Now what?

Wait there.

Hey!

What the hell was that?

When that $5.00 bill makes its way
back into my hands,

I'll be able to call you.

And when you hear my voice
on the other end,

then you'll believe in fate,
won't you?

Hey, what about me?

What do you mean?

Well, we have to send something
out in the universe

with your name on it, don't we?

Come on.
Isn't that the only fair thing?

That is the only fair thing.

What have I got, even?
Ooh.

No. I have a really good idea.

- What?
- Okay.

That's a lot of tuba.

- Okay, see this book?
- Yeah.

Okay, so when I get home tonight,

I'm gonna write my name and number
inside this book.

And then first thing tomorrow morning,
I'll sell it to a used-book store.

Which one?
You're not gonna tell me.

You're not gonna tell me.
Why not?

Well, now, every time you go past
an old bookstore,

you're gonna have to go inside
to see if it's there.

This is just wrong.

You don't just have the most
incredible night of your life

with a perfect stranger

and then leave it all
to chance, do ya?

Do ya?

Come with me a second.

What, are we gonna get a room?

I'm kidding.
But I wanna know you more.

Come on. Where are we going?

- Okay. Now, you stay here.
- Okay.

No, stay here. Stay there.

Don't make me come over there.

- Okay.
- Okay.

Right, if we both randomly
pick the same floor,

we're meant to be together now.

You're insane.

Come on.

Okay, get in...

take a breath,

and then when the door closes,
hit a button.

I don't understand this.

You don't have to understand.
You just have to have faith.

Faith in what?

Destiny.

Oh. Here.

Hey!

It's Sara.

My name's Sara.

And here it is.
See? You were right.

- Uh...
- Let's go, buddy.

- We're going up here.
- Oh, that's okay.

Josh likes to ride either way.

Don't you, Josh?

Don't do that!
Don't touch those!

Hey, calm down.
He's just a kid.

Looks like we've stopped.

- Oh. We're going again.
- Thank you.

Where is she? Is she here?

No, no. I don't think so.

Come on, Josh.
Let's go, buddy.

Okay, stay alert.

- Is she here?
- No, not here.

- Back in the elevator.
- She's not here?

Come on! Come on! Move it!
Come on, boy!

Hey, Sara.
Oh, I'm sorry.

- Hey. I'm sorry.
- What?

I'm sorry.

Usually, I have to beg
to be a part of weddings.

And if I do get into the wedding,

of course, they've postponed it
and it's overseas somewhere,

and they've canceled my passport
and I can't be a part of it,

and it's ridiculous and all for naught.

Well, thank you.
I take this very seriously.

It's a gift to be the best man.

They say that once in your lifetime,

someone comes along whom
you're absolutely meant to be with.

Everything feels great,
stars are aligned,

body and spirit are in balance.

For my friend Jonathan Trager,

that person...

was me.

But as you know,
Jonny and I were simpatico.

We were brothers
from another mother.

We were friends since freshman year.

I watched him go out
with woman after woman,

and he'd always come crawling...

He would come crawling back to me.

It was embarrassing.

You loved it.

But then one night he came home
and things were different.

His adolescent dream of becoming
a documentary filmmaker

was a thing of the past.

Thank God.

He hardly even responded to my playful
yet tormenting flicks of my finger

against the soft part of his skull

as he studied for finals.

And that is because
he had found her:

The woman
he was meant to be with.

And if anyone is qualified to know
when he met his soul mate,

it would be me,

his first wife.

She's smart, she's funny,
she's beautiful.

In short, she's the kind of woman
that any man would dream about.

And I think we all have.

So it is with sadness

and fond, fond memories,

that I raise my glass

to the new Mrs. Jonathan Trager.

- Aww.
- Hear, hear.

I'll tell you what.

I'll tell you something, my friends,
if I had to lose Jonny to anyone,

I can't imagine a more perfect
woman than Halley.

To Halley.

Cheers to both of you.

How drunk is he
on a scale of one to ten?

Twelve.

You think we'll ever out-romance
Dean and Courtney?

I don't know. I don't think
I've ever seen them fight.

Me neither.

Must be a bitch on their sex life.

We... We have a pomegranate souffle,
which is amazing,

which is different than the sorbet.

Listen, we'd love to join you guys,
but Courtney has to wake up,

so I got to be good.

Halley, listen to me.
It's not too late to back out.

- And I'm up... I'm up 116...
- Good night, Dean.

Mama, you don't want to see this,
but I need... I need to snuggle.

I'm gonna sleep it off.
Listen, you're wonderful.

- Good night.
- You know what? You need me.

Take care. Come on, hon.

You guys, listen, I hate to tell you,
but I gotta go home too.

- I have to.
- Come in for one drink.

I gotta get up at 8:00 in the morning.
My day is crazy tomorrow.

- Come in for one drink.
- He doesn't want to come.

- He doesn't have to come.
- I'll see you in about 20 hours.

- Bye-bye, dear.
- Good night.

- I love you, son.
- Night-night.

- George.
- Take care.

- Good night.
- Take care.

You okay?

- You better be up later.
- Yeah, why?

- Because I'm gonna come home and...
- Uh-huh.

Get undressed...

...climb into bed...
- Uh-huh.

Act like we just got over a terrible fight.

Cab!

See you later now.

Buy a book.

Reading is good for you.
Knowledge.

Read it?

Hold on, hold on.
Listen, listen.

I read it.
I read it a long time ago.

I'll throw in the screenplay
to the Bridges of Madison County.

- I saw the movie. It was great.
- I know you like that.

Okay, and...

And nothing. I mean...

I mean, I did nothing.
I... I just let her walk out of the party

and I didn't say anything to her.

And now she's gone forever.

I mean, she was my soul mate.

Kenny, I honestly think it's dangerous
to use the term "soul mate."

It implies there's some magical element
that we have no control over,

like fate or destiny.

I think holding onto beliefs like that
stops us doing the real work.

And the fact is,
if your therapy here stays on track,

I think you'll find there are
many, many people out there

you could easily be happy with.

You truly believe all that, Sara?

Yeah.
I really do.

- There you go.
- Thanks.

You got to say yes first.

Yes.

Wait a second.

Ow.

- Let me...
- I got it. I got it. I got it.

- Ow, ow, ow.
- I got it.

- I got it.
- Ow.

Ow!

Okay, you're not gonna
read into this, right, Sara?

I mean, it's just an accident,
nothing more.

No. God, we'll get it refitted.

It's beautiful. I love it.

You... You get changed.
I wanna call Ryan,

tell him you said yes.

Why? Was he worried?

Not about you.

About the tour.

He's hoping to fit the honeymoon
into the schedule.

How's Bora Bora sound?

Very... sexy sexy?

Now, if you're a golfer
on a one-hour lunch break,

you'd use that time up

just getting to the nearest course
out of Manhattan.

All this was a long overdue solution.

Formerly a dilapidated pier
and converted just five years ago,

the range offers the inhabitants
of this concrete jungle

the chance to keep
their drives straight,

their short games accurate,

and most of all, brings the joys
and frustrations of golf

back to city folk.

This is Nick Roberts,
ESPN News, New York City.

Superb, Nick.
We got it. Thank you.

- Artie, gotta run, okay?
- What about the B-roll shot?

- Paging Sara Lawson.
- No time. Totally jammed with the wedding.

Paging Sara Lawson.
Please come to the front desk.

You come back,
get the B-roll on Friday?

- Yeah. Whatever you say, boss.
- Thank you, sir.

I'm Sara Lawson. Hi.

- How are you?
- Sorry I'm late.

You're down at position number two.

Oh, right. Bad golfers
all the way down there, right?

Dude, take off. We got it.

Well, hello,
Mr. Marrying Man.

- Hi. Uh, where's Lauren?
- Oh, Lauren took the day off.

My name is Sara
and I'm gonna cut your hair today.

You know what?

I'm not thrilled with having
that "just cut hair" look

- for my own wedding, so...
- I'm just gonna take a little bit off.

I gotta live with these pictures
the rest of my life.

- Just a little bit.
- Please, you know, uh...

Forget Charles Street.

Take me to the New York Times building
on 42nd, please.

I'm telling you,
I keep running into it.

I keep finding it.
It keeps happening.

She was at the golf range.

She's a big girl now with big hips.
All right?

Then I gotta leave
'cause Sara's gonna cut my hair,

and the guy in the taxi,
he's serenading me, Sara.

I'm telling you, the universe
keeps revealing her to me,

screwing with my head.

- You're getting married in three days.
- That's my point.

It's entirely duplicitous.
Think about it.

Why would you risk
your relationship with Halley

just to search for some pipe dream?

Just hear me out, man.

I'm sure that I love Halley, all right?

And maybe every time
you fall in love with somebody,

it's a completely different experience,
so it's a mistake to compare them.

- I get it, but...
- Right.

All right...

It's like Halley is
The Godfather, Part II.

She's what?

Godfather, Part II.
That was an incredible movie.

Might be better than the original.
All right?

But no matter how much you love
The Godfather, Part II,

you still have to see the original

to understand and appreciate
the sequel, don't ya?

Come on. Is it too much to ask
of my oldest friend to help me out?

You already got
the fairy-tale marriage.

I'm the best man.

You work in the biggest
newspaper in the world.

- Now, why don't you help me find her?
- Let me tell you something:

Contrary to popular New York myth,
the Times is not omniscient.

I need a last name.
I need a social security number.

- If we find the book...
- It-It's a dead end. You know that.

Unless we search every bookstore
in New York.

You did that. Years ago.

- Do you remember?
- Maybe I missed a store.

Maybe somebody bought it
and sold it back.

Here's the deal. You know what?
I don't want any part of this.

All right?

Maybe I am just getting cold feet.

I'm telling you right now,
British women do not age well.

You know, I mean, years ago, yes,
she was a luscious treat.

You know, she probably looked like,
you know, Baby Spice.

But now she could look like...

Old Spice.

- It's a great haircut.
- Oh. Thanks.

- Tell me you love me.
- I love you.

- Tell me something romantic.
- Like what?

I don't know. Like...

how I'm the only girl in the entire universe
meant for you.

Oh, my God, the dinner!

By the way, I emptied your closet.

We gotta pack for the honeymoon.

God, I hate this building.

Shut up!

Don't hit it with the thing.

- Jon!
- What?

I'm gonna go yell at the super.

I don't understand
why this is going off.

You said last week it would be fine.

- Hey, Jon.
- Hey.

Jesus, this place looks like
a disaster area.

- Thanks, Gerald.
- Gerald, it's in here.

I gotta get going. Coming!

Come on! I wanna see!
I wanna see! I wanna see...

I thought you wanted
a round-cut diamond.

Why? When did I say that?

I'm not exactly sure. But, I mean,
when we were younger, I think.

Oh, God. When I was younger,
I was gonna marry Boris Becker, wasn't I?

- Hey, guys.
- Hey!

- What did you think?
- Well, I mean...

Was that last song
really inspired by my sister?

Every artist needs his muse.

- Who wants to hear the good news?
- Hey, I pay you for the good news.

No. You pay me to keep away
the bad news.

Bring it on.

Lars' dates in Stockholm sold out
in eight hours.

Wow!

That means we're gonna have to
add some more shows.

So we'll bump Paris
and then we'll...

Sorry. Um, I don't wanna
spoil anyone's party,

but Lars and I have already set the dates
for our honeymoon and our wedding,

and I've told my patients
when I'm going.

Well, baby, your patients can do
without you for a couple weeks.

He's right, Sara. I mean,

a couple of extra weeks in Europe
aren't gonna kill you.

Caroline's just pushing you
to stay longer

'cause she wants us
to house-sit for you guys.

Yeah, thank you. I was going to ask her
when she was drunk.

- Actually, that's a great idea.
- Yeah?

Yes! Come on, Kip. Let's get out of here
before Sara changes Lars' mind.

- I said something wrong?
- No, it's...

I've just got a very detailed schedule,
and my patients are important too.

I don't like changing the dates
at the last minute.

You know what I mean?

Excuse me. I'm sorry.

But I really need you to approve
these T-shirt designs for Australia.

- Oh, no problem.
- You don't mind, do you?

- Can we do this later?
- Yeah.

She don't mind.

That's chamomile for you ladies.
Nice and hot.

- Very good.
- But, Eve...

Sara, it was a movie poster.
It's no big deal.

It's peculiar though, right?
Don't you think?

Look, I thought you were through
with all this New Age bullshit

like horoscopes and feng shui
and all that crap.

Eve, for someone who owns a New Age store,
you are alarmingly earthbound.

Oh, yeah?
And for a shrink-in-training,

you are a little bit crazy.
I'll tell you that much.

Excuse me.
Do you carry the Casanova candle?

Yes. As a matter of fact, we do.

You know what? Check on the shelf
across from the Caligula incense.

And they're on sale,
so today's your lucky day.

Great. You see, that is what happens

when people get hooked
on the New Age life.

They end up sitting at home
burning candles for Mr. Right,

when Mr. Good Enough For Right Now
is waiting at the corner bar.

Hi. Oh, yeah.

She's a pain in the ass.

- And I gotta find her.
- I've been here three years.

- So this is...
- Yeah, I understand.

But your computer... your computer system
has been here for a long time.

I think... I think you're just
wasting my time, sir.

- No, no. Here's the thing.
- There's nothing I can do.

- It's very crucial.
- You cannot be over here.

You cannot come over
to this side of the counter.

- Please don't cross this line.
- I understand.

- Thank you.
- We're off to a bad start here.

All I really need, if you could, is just

if you could enter this account number
in the computer

and just tell me her name.

Oh, I see.
When you put it that way...

No.

All right.

Would 20 bucks help?

It might if I was a health inspector.

Listen, this is really important.

Oh, boy, did it again.
Crossed the line.

You have to remain on the other side
of the register.

I don't wanna say it again.
Remain on that side. Thank you.

Let's bottom-line this, huh?
What's it gonna take?

I have to have the name.

Well, I was a little short
on my weekly sales draw.

- Were you?
- I'm just mentioning.

Okay. Um, I'm going to, uh...

- Uh-uh.
- Look where my feet are. All right?

- A lovely choice, sir.
- Thank you.

The account number was 029351...

I thought you said you were gonna
help with my weekly draw.

The tie's worth $95.
We're still 700 short.

$700?

- 700.
- That's extortion.

That's good salesmanship, sir.

What do I need?
Ring it up.

- Well, we have a purple tie.
- Mm-hmm.

What would go with a purple tie?

I look like a magician.

All right, you horrible little man.

I bought the entire spring line.
Okay, you happy?

Now, look her up.

I already did.

It was a dead account.
There's no information in our computers.

- You give me that!
- Hey, chase me.

- Chase you? What? Are you insane?
- Don't cross the line!

- You crossed the line!
- Stop saying that or I will cut you!

Now, you better find a way
to help me right now!

- I can suggest another option.
- Suggest it fast.

When our customers
apply for a credit card,

the hard copies go to
our storage facility in Queens.

All you need is the account number,
which you already have,

and you can find her application.

However, you need an employee
to get you in.

You need an employee...

to get you in.

Crocodile.

Hal.

Halley.

Ah.

A natural.

- Yeah?
- Yeah. Really natural.

- No, no, no. Cut, cut, cut.
- What's the problem?

The problem is you can't fend off

an army of bloodthirsty
Vikings with a shehnai.

- It's illogical.
- No, see... no, no.

See, you're lulling them into submission
with the music.

That's the whole point of the song, really.
Mystic Surrender.

You don't think he looks like
he hates the music?

No. Hey.

Hey, baby.

Now, this guy, he's-he's like
Alec Guinness. So good.

Star Wars.
Obi-wan.

All right, right here, what are they doing?
What's their attitude?

What are they thinking?
Who are these people?

I tell you, they're in awe
and they're speechless.

And they're just grateful
and underfed.

Underpaid.

Why don't they ask me
to stay in the village and have a feast?

- Yeah. Sara, hey.
- Hey.

- Can we talk for a sec?
- Sure.

Okay, yeah, I'm going to split, guys.

Lars, I'll tell you what.
I'm gonna talk to the director,

and I'm gonna have him tweak
that whole section.

- It'll be fine. It'll be fine.
- Tell him about the feast.

- What's going on?
- I lost my keys yesterday.

Oh, that's a drag.

And I've just found them in the freezer.

I don't get it. Is that a joke?

No, Lars, it's not a joke.
I feel like I'm losing my mind.

It's the wedding plans
and the tour and my patients.

It's just a bit too much to deal with.

Okay, Sara, look. We're leaving
for Toronto in the morning...

...so don't fall apart on me now.
- I know, I know, I know, I know.

And that's why I think I need a little break.

What do you mean, a little break?

No, not that kind of little break.

I just mean a weekend away
to recharge my batteries and clear my head.

Hey, this has nothing to do
with the other night.

I just need this.
I need it for me.

But I won't go unless you say it's okay.

- It's okay.
- Thank you.

Okay. Where are you going?
Where are you going?

Oh, I don't know.
New York, maybe.

- Happy birthday.
- Oh, my God.

Are you serious?
Get out of town.

Yeah, that's the idea.

- Thanks. Talk to you soon.
- Okay.

This is unbelievable. Oh, my God.

Sara, really, this is
way too generous of you.

Oh, come on. Can't a girl do something nice
for her friend on her birthday?

And there's no ulterior motives?

Well, yeah.

I'm getting married in a week

and I'd just like to have one last fling
with my best friend

before I walk down the aisle.

It's so sweet. But, you know,
you're really not my type.

Oh, thanks.

- We're going to New York?
- Yeah. Yay!

Hey! Excuse me.

- Why so tense?
- Because you're freaking me out, all right?

- Is there another space you can be in?
- Oh. Excusez-moi.

- Uh-huh.
- And what is it you do?

Well, my sales clerk friend,
I happen to write for a little publication.

Maybe you've heard of it.
It's called the New York Times.

- Oh.
- Yeah.

Hello. Who?

Dean?
And who may I say is calling?

Uh-huh? Hang on.
Your editor.

Hi. No.

Didn't get... Didn't get a chance
to write that one. Uh...

Didn't... Didn't write that one either.

Uh, with all due respect, sir,
they'll all still be dead tomorrow.

Okay. Thank you.
Bye-bye.

- You write for the obituaries.
- Absolutely. Yeah.

- Hmm. You must be very proud.
- Uh-huh. I'm the one with the last word.

- Not tonight.
- Yes, I am.

- I don't think so.
- Absolutely.

- Fat chance.
- Still talking.

- Last line.
- Yeah, right here.

I don't know. I don't know.
My eyes are killing me.

My eyes are killing me.
Tell me these numbers match.

Here, I'll tell you.

- Let me see.
- Don't do that.

- Ah-ah!
- Is it 0293?

- 0293. Congratulations.
- You got it?

- I think you found her.
- No way.

Too bad the last name's
completely smudged out, though.

Well, it's his fault.
It was his thumb.

When he grabbed it,
his thumb went right across the...

right across the name.

Completely. I'm kidding.
It was smudged in my hand.

- Would you stop it?
- It's just a little joke.

That's carbon paper for you.

I guess that's why America rejected it.

What's that address?
Is that her address?

That's seven years ago, man.

So go to the building leasing office

and you'll find out who lived there
seven years ago.

It ain't rocket science.

Thank you.

The white zone
is for the immediate loading

and unloading of passengers only.
No parking.

- Hi.
- Hey.

- Where to?
- Yeah, where are we going?

Uh, okay, take us...

...anywhere in New York.
- Excuse me?

Anywhere.
Wherever you feel like going.

- That's not a destination, lady.
- Wait. You didn't make reservations?

- Um, okay, Eve, please don't get mad at me.
- What?

Oh, no. I cannot believe this.

I need a borough here, ladies.

Look, I was gonna tell you
when we got on the plane.

You know what?
That's really sneaky of you, Sara.

- I'm not a bloody psychic.
- Eve, wait! Wait!

Hold on one second.

- Eve. Eve!
- You tricked me.

I knew you wouldn't come
if I told you the truth.

And I needed my best friend with me.

What are you doing, Sara?

Honestly, Sara, I don't understand
you anymore, okay?

Please, tell me something.
Tell me anything that makes

just a little bit of sense.

I've just spent the entire flight
staring into the sky, thinking.

Not about my fiancé,
but about this mystery guy I met

a million and a half hours ago.

A guy I don't even remember,
except for this...

vague picture I have inside my head.

It was just a few seconds.
A fragment, really.

And it was like...

in that moment, the whole universe existed
just to bring us together.

That's why I'm here.

That's why I'm gonna let fate
take me wherever it wants to go.

Because when all this is over,

at least I'm never gonna have
to think of him ever again.

Let's just pray he's a bald fascist

who picks his nose and wipes it
under the car seat.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Could you hold on?

Where ya goin'?

You better be buying me one friggin'
big birthday cake, that's all I gotta say.

Could I get your destination, please?

- The Waldorf, I guess.
- Finally she gets it.

Okay, we are going... that way.

And I'm gonna follow you.

Come on, you can do it yourself.
Just open up the computer and look into it.

I'm not even sure that I can
give you this information.

Yes, you can. Why can't you?

Because I'm just a temp, okay?
I don't know the rules.

Couple of months out of college, you're acting
like you're part of the establishment.

No, no, no, no, no...
What about privacy law, huh?

Forget about privacy laws.
You know what privacy laws do?

- No.
- They protect millionaires.

Do you know who those millionaires are?

- Who?
- Tell him who they are.

- Tell him.
- Kids your age.

Pimple-faced college dropouts
who have made unhealthy sums of money

forming Internet companies
that create no concrete products,

provide no viable services
and still manage to generate profits

for all of its lazy, day-trading,
son-of-a-bitch shareholders.

Meanwhile, as a tortured member
of the disenfranchised proletariat,

you find some altruistic need
to protect these digital plantation owners?

Wow. Come on.

Come on.

- You guys want the tenant on record in 1994?
- December, to be exact.

- There's your tenant.
- Sebastian Mignon?

No. Mignon. It's French.

No, we're looking for someone
named Sara in that apartment.

You got the right one?

Maybe he was her boyfriend.

Thanks. Hey, you did the right thing.
Really, you did.

Good work, pal.

You got it.
M-i-g-n-o-n.

You got it? There you go.

Thank you so much, Sally.
You gotta love her.

- Where is he?
- Brooklyn.

Okay, let's, uh...

- Let's grab a subway.
- Wait a minute. Wait.

Aren't you forgetting about something?

- Uh, what?
- Wedding rehearsal. Bachelor party.

- Plenty of time. Plenty of time. Come on.
- You sure?

Yes. Gotta go to Brooklyn. Come on.

Okay...
Prada!

Oh, my God!

Ooh! Prada!

Ooh, I love this stuff.

- That's $20.
- 20 bucks?

Eve, that's a horrific knockoff.

At least my fake says Prada.
Yours says Prado.

Yeah? Well, I say for a dollar,
I can buy a little magic marker and fix that.

I'll take it. 20 bucks?

Right back here.
Here you go.

Two buckets of balls for the price of one
at the Chelsea Piers today.

- So where are we going to now?
- I don't know.

- Lady, lady, you're a golfer?
- I feel like... I feel something.

- Wanna play golf? Two for the price of one.
- Right where I'm standing.

Hey! Who are you?

Can you believe that?
Two bucket of... Whoa!

Will you help me up, ma'am?
Yeah, yeah, help me up.

- Oh, my God. Are you okay?
- Is the ball okay?

Yeah, the back of the head.
Is that all right?

Oh, my. Goodness gracious.

I'm all right. Thank you.
Can you get the flyers?

- Here you go.
- All right.

- It's a signal.
- Two buckets of balls.

- Taxi!
- Sara!

They should make pills for this.

He's gotta be here.

He's got to be here. I can feel it.

- Excuse me. Miss?
- Yeah?

- You're blocking my shot.
- Oh.

Oh. Sorry.

This is Nick Roberts,
ESPN News, New York City.

- Oh!
- Do you know who plays golf?

Guys who are too fat to play tennis.

Like that guy.

Well, this is a special occasion.

After all, how many times in your life
is your son gonna get married?

Well said.

You wanna know
why I love this game?

- No. Why?
- I'll tell ya.

You can take years off from playing
and still come back strong.

Well, me, I haven't played
in over five years.

You're kidding.

- Ow!
- Ooh!

- Are you all right?
- I'm okay.

Sorry up there.

- Eve, look out!
- Go.

- Oh!
- Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.

I'm, so sorr...
Are you okay?

Please say something.
Say something.

I think I swallowed a filling.

Thank you for letting us in.

Now, Mr. Mignon, we have an odd
and somewhat personal question to ask you.

Mignon.

Mr. Mignon.

Mignon. Like the meat.

Mr. Mignon, a few years ago,
did you live with a girl, first name Sara?

Attractive, dark hair,
kind of, like, mysterious,

you know, really amazing girl.

Oui.

Do you know where we can
locate this individual?

No, I do not.

- Do you remember her last name?
- No.

Oh, come on. You don't even remember
the last name of your ex-girlfriend?

I mean, I find that hard to believe.

You don't understand anything.

She was not my girlfriend.
She was just, uh, a roommate.

She stayed with me
for a very short period of time.

- She was placed with me by...
- A roommate finder's service?

Oui, oui, oui. She stayed with me
with her boyfriend for a few months...

- I don't care about him.
- And then he moved out very quickly.

And at the end of the year,
she moved out too. That's it.

Yeah, but did she leave
anything behind,

maybe with her last name on it,
like a receipt, a bill?

- Like a piece of luggage?
- No. No, no.

Anything would help, really.
Anything.

I remember she sat on me.

She... She sat on you?

Yes. She sat on me for a while.

I found her...

inspiring.

I guess this is why I started
painting her in the first place.

Oh. She sat for you.
I'm sorry.

That is what I said.

- That's what he said.
- Right.

- That's what I said.
- Clearly.

Do you happen to have the painting?

Hey, now you're gonna see
what it's all about.

You know, you see her face.

Okay. Yeah.

This is her, yes?

Yeah, sure.
Around the eyes a little.

I mean, I'm definitely getting
the British thing,

you know, with the crown
and the scepter.

Do you have a name
for the roommate finder's service?

- They would have the information.
- Absolutely.

- Yes. You have that name?
- No, I do not.

But if it helps, I do remember
where the service was located.

- Absolutely!
- Yes! Where? Where?

- Manhattan.
- Where in Manhattan, Mr. Mignon?

On 60th Street.

- Eastside or Westside?
- It was just next to that...

on the left of that splendid
little patisserie,

Serendipity.

That's it.

Get... Get ready.

Happy birthday.
It's on the house.

Thank you.

Thanks.

Oh, I'm a god-awful friend.

No, you will be if you sing.

Eve, thanks so much
for coming with me.

You're welcome.

Sara, you know,
it's a wonderful thought.

The idea that all of life,

that every single event
is all part of some master plan

designed to lead us
to our universal soul mate.

But if that's really true,
then what's the point of living?

Or making decisions?

Hell, why should we even get out of bed
in the morning?

For the cake?

No. Not for the cake.

So that you make mistakes.

Mistakes like this trip.

And if you're smart enough,
you learn from your mistakes.

You figure it out.
You... You think.

You... You realize that life isn't
some elaborate stage play

with directions for the actors.
Life's a mess, Sara.

It's... It's chaos personified.

I have to give it all up now, don't I?

Sara, you have a fiancé
who, despite his weird Eastern music,

which we hope is just a phase,
let's hope,

loves you very, very, very much.

It's not giving up. It's growing up.

Let's get out of here.

Yeah.

- Here's one.
- Ooh, catch it.

- It's a bridal shop.
- Oh, my God. The irony.

Wait right here. I'll be right back.

- Why?
- Stay here.

- Time, please?
- Uh, about 7:30.

Right. Right.

They moved downtown. If we get lucky
with traffic, we can still hit it.

- What time is rehearsal?
- Can't do it.

- Taxi!
- It's over, man.

What?

- What are you talking about?
- How can I ignore that?

"Bless the goddamn bride"?

- What?
- It can't get any more clearer than this.

I'm not supposed to be doing this.
It's not in the cards.

It's just...
Hey, it's another one of your clues, man.

Let's talk about it in the cab
on the way over. Let's go.

It's not a clue. It's a sign.

Well, what's the difference?

A clue is what a detective uses
to find a suspect.

The receipt, the warehouse,
that French guy...

- Uh-huh.
- Those are clues. This is a sign.

Me never finding the book, that's a sign.

Sara never finding the $5.00 bill,
that's a sign.

How could something not happening
be a sign?

Maybe the absence of signs is a sign.

Isn't it?

That's lucid.

Look, I don't know, man.
Maybe there is no fate.

And if there is,
it's not working for me.

You know, it's not actually supposed
to end this way, by the way.

We're supposed to pull the curtain
and see the wizard, all right?

- Get to the end of the river.
- This is the end of the river.

My wedding rehearsal starts
in less than an hour.

My bride is waiting for me.

Let me... Let me ask you
something here, okay?

If Sara were here right now,
poof, came down,

what would she tell you to do?

She would tell me to run,
not walk to the Waldorf

because all the signs point to me
getting married.

Look. Wedding dress.
Lots of white.

Okay, I hate to state the obvious...

- State it.
- Okay.

If you don't do this,
you may never find out who Sara is.

Maybe I was never supposed to.

Maybe all this is just a maze

designed to lead me directly back
to where I started.

Which is getting married.

They should make pills for this.

- Halley?
- Oh, my God. Eve!

What a crazy coincidence!
How are you?

- Good.
- Oh, my God.

Sara, can you believe
that I was Halley's R.A. In college?

Isn't that funny?
Oh, I'm sorry. This is Sara.

- Hi. Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too.

Oh, my gosh. What's it been,
like eight or nine years or something.

Eve was, uh...
I went to B.U. With Eve.

- Well, isn't that wonderful?
- Yeah. How about that?

So what are you doing here?

- I'm getting married tomorrow.
- You are?

- Yeah.
- Congratulations.

- Congratulations.
- Wow!

- Thanks.
- In this hotel?

Yeah, at 12 noon.
We're actually going to rehearsal.

- Why don't you come watch?
- Why don't you go?

Okay, sure. I would love
to come and watch.

And you can bring your...
partner if you want.

- Oh!
- Oh! No, no.

I have to go upstairs and call my fiancé...

...who's a man.
- Oh! You must be very proud.

- Okay, so have a good one.
- Okay.

- I'll see you later.
- Okay, good. Okay, bye.

Good-bye, my sweet lesbian lady lover.

I'm just kidding.
It's a joke between us.

Lars?

What are you doing?

How did you know where I was?

- Intuition.
- Really?

No. I went through
the New York hotel guide.

Alphabetically, in reverse.
I started with "Z."

Sara, I missed you so much.

I'm sorry. I don't blame you
for running away.

I was so... focused
on the album, the video.

I, Jonathan, take you, Halley,
to be my wife,

and I promise to love and sustain you

in the bonds of marriage
from this day forward.

And obviously, Jonathan,
you'll be looking at Halley.

And that's when the actual ceremony
will conclude.

- Excuse me.
- What?

Well, look, I need some help over here.

And then... then you're married.

- Hal, who's that girl over there?
- Huh?

- Oh, that's my old friend Eve.
- Oh.

Okay, everyone, that's a wrap.

And now make sure to be here
tomorrow morning

at 9:00 sharp for pictures.

Yes, yes. I hate to break up a good thing,

but we have half a dozen strippers
waiting for us. We're late.

- You mean "exotic dancers."
- No, no. I actually mean "strippers,"

- the women who take off everything.
- Llsten, I'll see you men at 9:00.

But remember, I promised Judy
I'd be home by 10:00.

Fantastic, Mr. McKinley.
It gives you an hour to get crazy.

- Okay, let's get into it.
- Hello, darling.

Uh, Dean, before you take Jon and Dad off
to your male-bonding ritual,

I need to talk to him.

Okay. Beautiful bride.
I'll be in the cab.

- Hi. I want you to meet Jon.
- Hi. It's so nice to meet you.

I would love for you
to come tomorrow.

- We'd feel terrible if you didn't.
- Really?

- Yeah.
- That's so sweet.

And it's tomorrow at noon?

Yeah, and you can bring
your friend if you want.

- Okay.
- Be there.

Wow. I'll be there.

Thank you. That's so nice.

- See you tomorrow.
- See you tomorrow. Nice to meet you.

Okay, bye. Bye. See you.

- Halley, what is it? What's wrong?
- It's you.

What do you mean, it's me?
What did I do?

Nothing, exactly.
It's just this feeling I have, like...

like you've been somewhere else
for the past few days.

- That's not true.
- Don't lie to me, Jonathan.

I've dreamed about this
my entire life, and... and...

I've imagined the dress and the flowers

and even the music
the band was gonna play.

And everything is
exactly the way I want it,

except for my fiancé,

who's just decided to float off
to Never-Never Land.

Look, maybe I've been
a little bit out of it the past week,

but it's just normal, you know, guy stuff.

It's a little cold feet.
Doesn't mean I don't love you.

Well, call me crazy, but I'd like
my fiancé's feet to be warm,

especially when we're hours
from going down the aisle.

I'm sorry, Hal. Really, I am.

Whatever it is that you're holding on to,
please just let it go.

Please.

I think it already let go of me, okay?

Wait. Wait one second.

- What's this?
- What do you think?

It's the traditional groom's gift.

I got yours, and I forgot to bring it.

I know. It's okay.

Open it.

It's a first edition.

It's just that every time
we go into a bookstore,

you're always flipping through it.

And I checked this week.
You don't even have a copy.

What's wrong?
Don't you like it?

It's perfect.

It's an excellent choice.

What's going on?
Are you all right?

- Her name's Sara Thomas.
- What?

How did...

Halley gave it to me as a wedding gift.

Sally?

It's Dean from Obits. Hey.

Uh, I need an address
for a Sara Thomas.

S-a-r-a T-h-o-m-a-s.

Uh, I got an old phone number.

Yeah, we'll hold.

Hang on.
Sir, can you pull this thing over?

I can't hear a thing.

Honey, just one second.
Okay, go. What?

What?

We have to cancel Dusseldorf.
Why?

We have to cancel Stockholm?

Oh. Look at those stars.

They all have names, you know.

I don't know what that is.

It's Cassiopeia.

The... stars in the sky.

It's... It's Cassiopeia.

You realize with the time delay,

if our return flight takes off
more than ten minutes late,

I miss my own wedding, okay?
Does that bother you in the slightest?

You are a jackass.

- Well, thank you.
- You are. You...

Y-Y-You're my hero, you know?

You're like my oracle and shit,
you know?

You're out there, man,
and you're making it happen.

Courtney moved out.

- What?
- Yeah. It's... Look, man.

We'd been fighting for a really long time.

- Why didn't you tell me?
- We didn't want to ruin your wedding, man.

It would just... Didn't want
to rain on your parade, man.

What the...
What the hell happened?

We just...
We let it slip away, you know?

That's the point. It...

You know, it died.

- We died.
- What was the cause of death?

Not enough of all of this, of this, of this.

And not enough, you know? Do you...

Do you remember
the philosopher Epictetus?

- You remember what he said?
- No, of course not.

He said, "If you want to improve,

be content to be thought
foolish and stupid."

That's what you've done.

- I work hard at it.
- Now I want to be a jackass.

You know?

You're the shit!

That would be me, the shit.

Yeah. He's the shit. Okay.

You know what, old buddy?

On second thought,
maybe you should call first.

- What are you talking about?
- Give her a ring. It's more polite that way.

Calling her gives her a chance
to clean up, you know.

I don't care how clean her house is!

- She might. She might.
- What are you talking about?

- You told me to go! You said I was your hero!
- I forbid you to look.

I forbid you to look. You can't look.

Why are you Van Gundy?

- I don't want you to get hurt. Don't get hurt!
- I won't get hurt.

- Listen, don't get hurt!
- You're hurting me! Oof!

- I think that went very well.
- [Sighs]

Didn't... Didn't she say that everything
happens for a reason?

- Yeah, she did.
- Well, maybe we're laying here because...

Because why?

Because you don't want to be
standing somewhere else.

I see. Yeah. We're crawling.

We're crawling.

Ladies and gentlemen,
this is the captain speaking.

I'm sorry to report that we're gonna be
on the ground a little longer

due to some bad weather
heading this way.

The air traffic controller has put us on hold,
so in the meantime,

I've asked the cabin attendants
to start the movie.

- Hey, you getting ready?
- Yeah.

You know me.
I love a good wedding.

- So have you talked to Lars?
- Yeah.

We spoke this morning before he left.

I think he's gonna be okay.
At least I hope so.

You know, of course he's gonna be okay,

and I gotta tell you something,
you're gonna be okay too.

Yeah?

Oh, you know what?
Um, there's a lady glaring at me.

I don't think I'm supposed to be
on the phone.

Um, can I call you when I get home?

Have a safe flight, okay?

- Lots of love. Bye.
- Headsets?

- Yes, I will.
- $3.00, please.

What the hell is this?

Something the matter?

Yes. I think I've mixed up my wallet
with my friend's.

Yes, I have. See? Prado.

Oh.

Well, is there any money in it?

I'll have a look.

Yes, there is. Thank you.

Two ones... and a five.

- Thank you very much, sir.
- Thank you.

- Uh, sorry. Excuse me.
- That's the gentleman's change.

- Jonathan.
- Excuse me. I just...

Jonathan.

Sorry. You know what? I'm gonna...

Thank you. Excuse me.
Sorry. Whoo! I'm sorry!

Hi. Yeah. It's in New York City.

Um, I need the address of a Jonathan Trager.

Yeah. T-r-a-g-e-r.

34 Charles Street?
Thank you.

34 Charles Street.

Okay.
Hi.

- Can I help you, ma'am?
- I'm looking for a Jonathan Trager.

Is this his building?

You must be late.

Late for what?

The wedding.
Waldorf-Astoria.

- He's getting married?
- Yeah. Might be already.

Wait! Hey, wait! Wait!

Excuse me!

Sorry. Can you take me
to the Waldorf-Astoria

as fast as you can go, please?

Can you see what it is?

Oh! Sorry. Sorry!

Oh. Oh, please, God, no.

Stop!

Stop?

Is it over?

- The wedding?
- Yeah.

Oh, yeah.
It's over, all right.

But don't worry.

You'll get your present back.

- Excuse me?
- They always return the presents.

You asked if it was over.

The truth is, it never even began.

What?

Yeah, he called the whole thing off
this morning.

He called it off?

That's terrible.

Were you a friend of the bride...

or the groom?

- What's up with this weather, huh?
- Yeah, what happened to spring?

So, all right, let's get into it.

What kind of pep talk
do you want?

What do you got?

Well, I've got the inspirational,

"You can achieve anything
you dream about."

It's very popular,
but not appropriate for this.

Of course, there's the "Don't worry.
There's more fish in the sea" pap.

No.

Uh, we can always fall back on the classic,

"When God shuts a door,
he opens a window."

How about telling me
I did the right thing?

I don't have to tell you.

I wrote it.

- What's this?
- It's your obituary.

Nice.

Turns out I had writer's block
penning your best man speech,

and that's what ended up coming out.

Blame it on the day job.

- 20, right?
- Thanks.

You going to see Courtney?

Absolutely.

I needed this.

You know, the Greeks
didn't write obituaries.

They only asked one question
after a man died:

"Did he have passion?"

How do I look?

Like a jackass.

- Good luck, man.
- Thank you.

Jonathan Trager,

prominent television producer for ESPN,

died last night from complications
of losing his soul mate and his fiancée.

He was 35 years old

and soft-spoken

and obsessive.

Trager never looked the part
of a hopeless romantic.

But in the final days of his life,

he revealed an unknown side
of his psyche.

This hidden quasi-Jungian persona

surfaced during
the Agatha Christie-like pursuit

for his long-reputed soul mate,

a woman whom he only spent
a few precious hours with.

Sadly, the protracted search
ended late Saturday night

in complete and utter failure.

Yet even in certain defeat,

the courageous Trager
secretly clung to the belief

that life is not merely

a series of meaningless
accidents or coincidences.

Uh-uh. But rather
it's a tapestry of events

that culminate in an exquisite,
sublime plan.

Asked about the loss
of his dear friend,

Dean Kansky,

the Pulitzer Prize-winning author

and executive editor
of the New York Times,

described Jonathan
as a changed man

in the last days of his life.

"Things were clearer for him,"
Kansky noted.

Ultimately, Jonathan concluded
that if we are to live life

in harmony with the universe,

we must all possess a powerful faith

in what the ancients
used to call fatum,

what we currently refer to...

...as destiny.
- Destiny.

So what are you gonna do?

I don't know. I guess I'm just gonna
try and find him or something.

Oh, you know what?
I don't think you should do that.

I really don't.

- Well, what do you think I should do?
- I think you should just be here.

I feel it. I feel it in the air.

Eve, what's happened to you?

You've become your own worst
nightmare right there.

Bye.

But please put a jacket on.
It's freezing out here.

I'm Jon.

I'm Sara.

Happy anniversary.

When did you get to be
so unabashedly romantic?

I think it's good luck we return each year
to the scene of the crime.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

Oh, I don't think so!
No beverages on the premises!

- I'm gonna have to ask you to leave.
- Hey, how you doing?

- Don't you remember me?
- Yes, I do.

- This is the girl.
- Miss Carbon Copy?

- Yes.
- I see.

- This is the guy who helped me...
- If you're not gonna purchase anything,

please make room
for paying customers.

We do. We want some gloves.
Black cashmere gloves.

Oh, I'm sorry.
That'll be the closing bell.

- Perhaps tomorrow.
- Oh, you're not serious.

- Come on.
- Store hours 10:00 to 7:00,

- except Sundays and holidays...
- He warms up.

...at the discretion
of the management

or the possible exception
of visiting dignitaries.

Oh, no, no, no! Don't... please, please!
On the other side of the counter.

You cannot come back here.
This is for authorized personnel only.

Please remain on the other side
of the counter.

Thank you very much.