Povestea unui pierde-vara (2018) - full transcript

First you take my money, and
then you take me for a fool?

Like I can't see your greatness?

How could we have
missed your brilliance?

And that you're depressed
because you're a genius?

So stop it now.

When did I ever say I was a genius?

Or that you're idiots who'll never
understand me?

It's not personal.

Every artist complains:

people stopped reading,
don't go to the theater...

They do go to the theater.



Sold out!

All these whiners
should ask themselves

if anybody cares about
the nonsense they come up with.

You want people to pay?
Just put on a good show.

-Right?
-Right.

Then we should pander to our audience?

-Where are you without your audience?
-I agree.

Even if you write nonsense...

if you're honest about it,
people will embrace it.

But you're never honest!
Maybe that's why you fail.

It's called dramatic license.

Why make excuses?

People won't pay
for what they can't understand.

If we all pandered to our audience,



we'd just be
regurgitating clichés...

Nothing original.

Besides, we can only guess
at what the public wants.

The public wants...

Hold on, there are studies, statistics...

Case in point:

Let's say, statistically, 60%
of people prefer comedy.

Then your story has a
60% chance to sell.

Of that 60%, 35% prefer...

You're something else!

You think art is about
bean counting and Excel tables?

You think Shakespeare was a bean counter?

Shakespeare wrote simple
stories for regular people.

Boy loves girl -conflict.

Shakespeare is great
because his stories have substance.

Whatever the case,
you have to be a real writer.

And you can't learn it from a book.
It's in here.

-I can't believe you!
-Why?

Do I try to tell you how
to teach Math at the university?

If Math didn't completely baffle you,
you would.

I don't even know
what it's good for.

Just like your books.

What books?

Thank God you're a big time Professor
who takes advantage of his students.

You know what'll happen to you?

You saw what they did
to that guy in Iași.

Who?

Some Med school professor who
blackmailed his students into having sex.

Really?!
What a jerk!

-It's not the same.
-Really?

You're both professors.

A village girl
comes to the big city.

-She gets some attention from her prof...
-Adjunct.

You don't even have to blackmail them.

Especially if they have daddy issues...

Oh, so you never took advantage
of being a writer?

Not the same.

Being a writer might make me
more interesting, even cool...

But as a teacher, you're Daddy.

You're mature, experienced...

Little girls have to listen to you,
or you make them stand in the corner.

As their professor, you're the
top dog and you call the shots.

-Adjunct professor!
-Fine!

Maybe, but I never
slept with my students.

Not while I was teaching them.

-And Cristina?
-Who?

Cristina is not in my class.

But you're still Mr. Professor to her.

Cristina who?

She's in Applied Sciences,
we get together now and then.

How did you meet?

After some joint lecture,

some students stayed behind...

Then last week, on my way
to the cafeteria,

I saw her in the hallway.

-Hi.
-Cristina, right?

-How'd you remember?
-Good memory, I guess.

I think she felt flattered
that I remembered.

In the cafeteria,
she told me about herself.

She was from Bacău, I think,

got transferred,
tried to go to Dental School,

ended up at the Polytechnic University...

I was good at Math.

-You like Math?
-Yes.

Let me know if I can help.

I will.

I walked her to her dorm
near the Law School.

She told me about her family.

I wasn't really interested,
but it's a necessary step.

Of course.

She asked if I was married,

I asked if she had a roommate...

You know, the usual.

Loaded questions.

And if you have someone over,

do you hang a sock
on the doorknob?

When we said goodbye
in front of her dorm...

I kissed her on the cheek
and told her she smelled nice.

So lame!

I had to make a move.

Was it true, at least?

She smelled... OK.

-And then?
-Then...

What's your roommate's name?

Ramona.

Won't she be back?

Not tonight.

She won't mind that
we stained her sheets?

I'll change them later.

I have to go anyway.

You can stay.

I don't sleep well in a strange bed.

And it's too narrow.

I tried it before.

I'm too old for this.

You said you were forever young.

In spirit.
Physically, I'm a mess.

What about the security guard?

He stared me down
on the way in.

-So?
-What if he asks where I've been?

You're a big boy,
you'll think of something.

Right.

-Sure you won't mind?
-Mind what?

Me leaving.

No, don't worry.

I like to sleep alone too.

OK, I'm off.

OK.

Do you have
the security guard's number?

-Why?
-To get him to come upstairs.

So I can leave while he's coming up.

I don't have it.

Too bad.

You were afraid of the security guard?

No, just embarrassed.

Does Irina know about your flings?

We agreed not to discuss them...

If that's your deal, fine by me.

But you're judging me.

Why shouldn't I?

You don't understand our relationship.

-And you do?
-Meaning?

Do you understand what's going on?

With Irina and me?
Of course I do.

We agreed to be friends with benefits.

No need to talk about
our extra-curricular activities.

-So you don't ever judge anyone?
-Well, no.

-His life, his decisions.
-You see? A wise man.

Fine, then I won't judge.

I might break up with Irina anyway.

Why, is it falling apart,
your sophisticated arrangement?

Where you can eat your cake
and everybody else's too?

It's not the arrangement, it's something else.

Then what?

I'm not fully taking advantage of the arrangement.

At your age, already?

Not like that, but...

Since I've been with Irina,
I've never come.

-"Come" as in...
-Yes.

I've never climaxed with her
these 4-5 months.

I did with others.

-You mean never?
-Never.

Except with the others.

Good thing I don't judge you!

Everything is great between us.

Except for this.

Just a detail.

Otherwise they like
the same TV shows!

-But you come with the others.
-Not all.

I wish you had one with me.

Not to pressure you,
but I'm jealous.

-Didn't we say no jealousy?
-Envious, then.

I wish you also felt at ease
with me.

-I do.
-Yeah, right.

-Do I look uneasy?
-Yes.

-But you enjoy it?
-Yes.

-That's what matters.
-And you?

I enjoy it.

You're too tense, you have to let go.

-Me, too tense?
-Just dance with me!

I don't dance.

You're so shut down.

Shhh.

I have to get the roof fixed.

My point exactly.
When I try to talk to you...

-Shhh. Hear it?
-No.

Hear what?

-The pigeons.
-No.

It's coming from there.

You're being paranoid.

-You can't hear them?
-No.

I can't hear a thing.

Because they're spooked.

You're avoiding me.

There's nothing to talk about,
everything is fine.

-It is?
-Yes.

Except for the pigeons.

-They're inside?
-No, in the ceiling.

They left a gap up there
when they insulated it.

The pigeons are
between the ceiling and the roof.

And you want pest control to...?

Get them the hell out,
they're annoying.

How?
Pelt them with stones?

Whatever they use for rats.

That would mean killing them.
And they're not rats.

They're airborne rats, with wings.

Ever see people
feeding rats in the park?

Or trained rats,
that fly back home?

They're filthy and carry disease.

Ever hear of rats
carrying love letters?

Or 100 white rats released
under the wedding table?

I'd go to a wedding like that.

Pest control can't help you.

Then what?
They've moved in!

They're so loud,
you'd swear they were turkeys.

Get a cat.

-I'm allergic.
-Get a bald one.

A hypoallergenic, hairless cat.

I'm allergic to cats, not cat hair.

There's no such thing.

-You're allergic to cat hair.
-No, to cats!

You know what?
You could get a falcon.

-A falcon?!
-Keep it on your shoulder, like a pirate.

Two Lucky Strikes.

I don't want an ugly break up.

It's a good relationship.

-Yeah.
-That sucks.

Your story is a novel
waiting to be written.

I would read it.

Actually, I would write it.

Well, maybe a short story.

About a guy thinking
he's got the perfect arrangement

and how destiny cheats him
by making him impotent.

-It's pretty funny.
-Who said I was impotent?

I just don't have orgasms.

Impotence is better for the story.

Write about
someone who's really impotent!

It's kind of like impotence.

-Say you wanted a baby -
-I don't.

If you did.

She can't get pregnant
if you don't come,

even if you're firing real bullets.

-But isn't that called impotence?
-What if a woman doesn't come?

-Women can't be impotent.
-Just frigid.

You see? Double standards.

It is what it is.

I'm not impotent!
I'm fine with other women.

It's only Irina.
And that's why I'm done.

You have to tell me more.

Please don't write about me.

-I'll bring a notepad.
-Go ahead.

You staying?

Gotta finish this.

I'm off.

-You're not angry, are you?
-No.

-Are you angry with me?
-No. Bye!

-Bye!
-Later!

Now you're writing novels?

Here's a song like no other
The story of a summer lover.

Footloose and fancy-free
He strolled the streets of destiny.

He was a man of a certain age,
well-built and nicely groomed.

Not too short,
not too tall, full of confidence.

A university professor -
the students loved him.

Especially the girls.
And he loved them too.

He was the campus Don Juan,
the college Casanova.

A Math professor who liked
equations with factors unknown.

-Mariana ironed them for you.
-Thank you.

-Don't, I'll get you a nutcracker.
-I'm fine.

Want some sponge cake?

How is Irina?

Working on her doctorate.

-All good between you two?
-Yes.

I gave Rodica your number.
Remember her?

-Rodica from Focșani?
-Yes.

Her niece goes to the Galați
Polytechnic University.

And she wants to transfer here.

What am I supposed to do?

Meet with her, give her
some advice, help her out.

Please, you know
how fond I am of Rodica.

Have her call me.

-Have you seen the doctor?
-Yes.

What did he say?

Come on, it's not that bad!

Really not a big deal!

You can get dressed.

Nothing unusual,
maybe a little swelling.

A little swelling?
What does that mean?

It's normal for your age.
It loses vigor.

The "little swelling" part
concerns me.

Should I be worried?

Your prostate is fine.

But sometimes I don't feel good.

No fever or anything, but...

It could be exhaustion, stress...

-I'll run some tests on you.
-Then we'll know?

Yes.

We'll do a full blood panel,

a fibrinogen test,
full urinalysis...

What about STDs?

Sure, if you want.

HIV, chlamydia,
syphilis, gonorrhea,

hepatitis B.... What else?

Just do them all.
Better safe than sorry, right?

Alright.

VDRL, TPHA, HPV DNA genotyping,

herpes simplex 1 and 2...

Maybe a Pap smear?

Just to be sure.

Petru decided to end it with Irina.

An incomplete relationship,
it was going nowhere...

They could be friends,
he thought.

They got along well,
he liked that about her.

But how to tell her
without hurting her?

He approaches her, finally...

-The intercom's broken again.
-I know.

Sit down for a bit.

-On the bed?
-Yes.

-I sat on the subway in these.
-It's OK, I'll change the sheets.

I have something
important to tell you.

I also have something...

Oh yeah?
I'm pregnant.

-What?
-I'm pregnant.

Is that all you can say?

No, I mean...

-Am I the father?
-Yes.

-How do you know?
-What, that it's you?

-Yes.
-Call it a hunch.

-Are you 100% sure?
-That I'm pregnant or that it's yours?

-Yes.
-Yes what?

-That it's mine.
-Yes, I'm sure!

How?
Have you been with anyone else?

-No.
-How about that guy?

-The graphic artist, Cristi?
-Cătălin.

Right, the advertising guy, Cătălin.

Haven't seen him in 4-5 months.

-Not at all?
-Not at all.

Then someone else?

I last slept with someone else
in September, do the math.

What are you going to do?

I figured we should both decide.

Of course.

What do you have to say?

What can I say?

There's nothing to say?

I have to go to the bathroom.

Morning sickness?

How can this be?

-I never came inside.
-Well, it happened.

-How?
-The doctor said it can happen.

How the hell do I
break up with her now?

It's tricky.

I can't ask her to get an abortion
and then break up with her.

I'm not like that.

What does she want?

Hell if I know.

Her clock is ticking,
if I were to guess.

So is yours.

Didn't she tell you?

We didn't get to talk.

I said they need me at the
University. That it's urgent.

Urgent?
What are you, a surgeon?

I didn't know what else to say!

Now the story's developing some conflict.

Cut the nonsense,
this is serious!

What nonsense?
This is my next book.

She gets pregnant,
but you never ejaculated.

It's awesome.

-Fine, write whatever you want.
-Thank you.

I have to end it without hurting her.

There's no way, man.

The longer I wait,
the harder it will be.

You know best.

So do it!

We said we'd talk
when she gets back.

She took a few days off.

That gives you time
to plan your next move.

At least now you can't say I'm impotent.

At the very least.

You're not,
but the character...

Screw your character.

A storm of emotions
fell upon him that quiet morning.

Should he welcome the baby
and start a family with Irina?

What if destiny was
speaking to him, loud and clear?

So many thoughts, and
it wasn't even his only problem.

I'll tell her
we shouldn't rush into things.

-Your entire lives are ahead of you.
-Pretty much.

I can't do it.

She'll only cling to me harder.

You have to see
what she wants, too.

Tomorrow I'll lay it all out.

-Brutal honesty.
-It's for the best.

What if she wants to keep it?

How could she
raise a child alone?

What if she says
she wants to raise it alone?

I have no idea.

We'll see tomorrow.

Should we try later?

Let's play them.

No, let's play them.

I'm with you.

How about a 3 on 3?
Pass the ball.

Let's use ours.
What?

You want to start?
Go ahead!

Go!

Here!

Pass me the ball!

Is it ours?

It didn't bounce.

Look!

Move!

-Foul!
-Pass it.

He pushed me!

Yes you did!

-Here!
-Foul!

Again?

You're attacking me!

Two fouls already.

You touched it!

Give it to them, poor kids.

I was open!
Catch!

Watch it!

Wait, time-out.

I'm dead.

I'm dizzy.

We can't let some kids beat us!

I have a gig tonight,
I need my energy.

Me too.

-You too what?
-Need my energy.

Come on! At least 10 points!

To save face!

That was one bad idea.

I thought it would
help you relax.

Right, I'm so relaxed.

-A little exercise can't hurt.
-"A little"?

It wasn't that bad!

You're so brave!

You old geezers.

One foot in the grave.

Ioana?

Petru, how are you?

-Good, and you?
-Just got off work.

-Me too.
-What do you do?

I teach Math at the Polytechnic.

We played a little basketball.

-Me and Silviu and...
-Silviu who?

He went to our high school, in...
What section?

-Section C.
-Oh, C.

And this is Andi.

-Hi.
-Nice to meet you.

-Do you work nearby?
-No, I had a meeting.

Married?

Divorced.

-I'm sorry.
-Don't be. And you?

Neither married, nor divorced.

Or widowed.

-That's good, right?
-Right.

Great, then.

Here's my business card.

-I'll text you my number.
-Sure, we'll talk.

Good.

-Great seeing you again.
-You too.

Bye, then.

Bye!

Bye!

You didn't tell her she smelled nice.

-No need to.
-Just to make sure.

Is she the Ioana
you made out with in 12th grade?

It was just one kiss.

So it is her.

But there was always
sexual tension between us.

-Unresolved.
-We didn't get a chance.

Obviously, you're still
hot for one another...

-It's in the past.
-HOT, I said!

It's not too late.

Pity you're about to be a dad.

Don't go there!
I'll break up with Irina tomorrow.

I can't believe this guy!

I've been thinking.

I don't think I want the baby.

It's a bad time for us both.

Really?

Are you sure?

Yes, I am.

If you think so...

I mean, I think so too.

Also, we should take a break.

I mean, we can be friends.

We should both try to...

To learn from this.

So it's not just some
unpleasant event in our past.

Yes, I... uh...

I didn't expect this.

I'm surprised.

I also don't want to end things
on a bad note.

Right. I'll...

Our hero hadn't expected
Irina's abrupt decision.

How convenient!
He didn't have to break her heart.

He didn't even say what he wanted.

You could say he handled it
more than honorably.

Irina's conviction had impressed him.

She knew him so well,
he didn't need to say anything.

Still, something was off.

A vague feeling
of guilt, frustration...

Or something else.

It was so strange.

I felt...

Weird.

What did you feel?

Guilt?

I don't even know.

-Guilt too, yes.
-Frustration?

Maybe that too.

Shock, mostly.

Shock.

She totally blindsided me.

I was ready with all my arguments
and counterarguments.

And counter-counterarguments.

I was expecting tears.

Two sentences from her,
and it was check-mate.

But you got what you wanted.

Yes...

After I looked long and hard
for a solution,

she solved it in the blink of an eye.

Simple and effective.

You should learn from her.

-Yes, I should.
-Yes.

All's well that ends well.

Don't stress it.

Relax and enjoy!

I think so, yes.

It's what I wanted after all.

No reason to feel bad.

-Right?
-Right?

Yes.

Cheers!

-Bye.
-See you!

Later.

Bye, Simona!

Now that he got what he wanted,
he expected things to return to normal.

He had to get over it,

see to his life and
his unfinished business.

Life had to get back on track,

discarding unpleasant events

in the recesses of memory.

What's wrong?

Just a moment.

I should call an exterminator.

Maybe you should.

Wait, they threw me off.

They ruined my mood.

-Want a drink?
-No, thanks.

-Are you sure?
-Yes.

Really sure?

There would be something...

-Really?
-Yes.

Let me turn that off.

Hello?

Yes, hello.

What?

How on Earth?

Is she conscious now?

Where are you?

On my way.

Yes, I'm coming.

I have to go.

It's...

My mom passed out,
she's in the hospital.

What happened?

It's her heart.
A neighbor found her.

-Is she conscious?
-They didn't say.

I have to run.

Sorry.

Petru!

Mrs. Dincă, how is she?

Sleeping.
They got her blood pressure down.

-What happened?
-She passed out.

High blood pressure,
she called me.

I found her on the floor.
I called the ambulance right away.

Will she be OK?

Once they get her test results,

they'll see about
putting in a pacemaker.

-A what?
-To regulate her heartbeat.

-So she'll go into surgery?
-The doctor will explain.

I talked to him.

He seems very competent.

Hey.

Hey.

How is it going?

Oh, teaching.
You?

I wanted to see
what's up with you.

I'm trying to put these together.

Not now. In general.

In general, I'm OK.

You're acting a little strange.

I'm sorry.
I'm having a tough time.

I understand.

I feel ridiculous for coming.

I should be the one feeling bad.

My life is upside-down and...

I'm trying to get used to it all.

Well then.

I'm meeting the Dean.

OK, I have class.

-Talk to you later.
-Sure.

Alright then. Bye.

Bye.

Hello.

The recent events
had Petru confused.

Had confused Petru.

Or something.

Had confused him.

Petru, that is.

His thoughts didn't
seem to add up.

Much like this story.

What do you mean it doesn't add up?
Listen to this.

Listen, dear friends...

Here's a song like no other
The story of a summer lover.

Footloose and fancy-free
He strolled the streets of destiny.

One night, under the stars above,
He met a girl and fell in love,

So our poor dreamer,
Under the starry glimmer,

Shed his first bitter tear...

I think I was wrong about Irina.

-How?
-I shouldn't have let her go.

-Are you messing with me?
-No.

I don't have my notepad!

Screw the notepad.

Stupid auditions!

Why?

After the audition,
they said it was perfect.

I got my hopes up.

Then -nothing.

Now they called me back,
I'll get my hopes up again...

But how will you get cast
if you don't go to auditions?

You think De Niro goes to auditions?

I see your point.

But here's my two cents,
and don't take it personally:

De Niro might be
a bigger name than you.

Kiss my ass.

I keep getting called back,
then Dragoș Bucur gets the part.

What part?

-In a musical.
-Oh.

What's bothering you?

-Nothing.
-He misses Irina.

Say what?

-Sorry.
-I just think I rushed into it.

As in?

-I shouldn't have let her go.
-What?

-You wanted to dump her!
-Yes, but...

I rushed into it.

Make up your mind!

Can't help it.

So what now?

Tonight I'll ask her to reconsider.

Maybe we can keep the baby and...

Try to make our relationship more...
Normal.

Are you serious?

Why shouldn't we keep the baby?

Think about it a little more!

I have.

We can afford it
with the paid maternity leave.

Are you ready to be an adult?

-What, I'm not an adult?
-I mean...

Are you ready to be a father?

What does that even mean?

Were our parents ready?

It's about your mindset.

Will you give up
your comfort for a baby?

It's a baby, not an ogre!

If you're going down this...

I'm glad.

It's new material for my story.

You still want to write
a book about this?

I gave up, but I may reconsider.

It may be interesting.

It just may be.

We are young
So let us sing!

We have no worries,
We have no worries...

Hi.

Hi, how are you?

I've been better.

I bet.

You?

I'm fine.

I'm glad.

Listen, I've been thinking.

I think we should keep the baby.

-Are you serious?
-Very.

-What's so funny?
-It just is.

Let me in on it.

You really want a baby with me?

Yes, I really do.

Let's put it this way.

You really want a baby?

You don't look too convinced.

I want a baby with you, not just...

-See?
-See what?

That you're a fool.

-Why?
-Can't you tell?

No.

My point precisely.

Why am I a fool?

You want a baby with me,
but you don't really want a baby.

I'm flattered, but why would I want to be
with you and have a baby you don't want?

Who says I don't want it?

I saw it in you when I told you.

You're not too convincing now either.

How do I become convincing?

Do you really want to wake up
every 4 hours to feed the baby?

To change diapers, to bathe it?

To take care of it 24/7?

I thought we'd be doing it together.

Irrelevant.

I just wanted to see your reaction.

Whether you understand
the implications.

The abortion is over with,
so it's all moot.

What?

-When?
-Two days ago.

So, you know.

Maybe if you had
told me all this before...

Can't we pick up where we left off?

Where we left off?

I mean, like nothing happened.

This event made me realize
we can't go on like this.

It was a wake-up call.

We're not 20 anymore.

I need to figure out my life.

Preferably with someone
who's on the same page.

What, I'm not?

I don't think so, no.

But we get along so well!

But we're not
on the same page.

What should I get you?

Some tea.

-Hello.
-Hi.

I'm Sânziana.

Have a seat.

Thank you.

-I'm Petru.
-I figured.

-I was about to give up.
-I'm sorry.

I took the wrong bus
from the train station.

Then I took another.

At least it wasn't late.

You came by train?

Yes, an hour ago.

-And you'll go back today?
-Yes, tonight.

So you want to get into
the Polytechnic University.

Yes.

-What section?
-Automatization and IT.

Right, my mother told me.

Yes, I'm in my 2nd year in Galați.

So why transfer?

My parents heard that it's
easier to find good jobs here.

Yes, our graduates
are very much in demand.

But you'll need to
start over with year one.

I know, I called the University.

It is what it is.

How about this:

Try to solve this problem.

Now?

Yes, so I can see your level.

-I'm not prepared.
-That's the idea.

Alright.

Your major is hard to get into.

Ten applicants for every spot.

That's why I didn't apply here first.

You should start studying,
time is short.

I thought a year or two in Galați
would get me ready.

You should get a tutor.
All the applicants do.

-Except for the prodigies.
-I see.

I wouldn't rely on
what you learned in Galați.

How were your grades?

So and so.

The first year was easier.

So you could do with some tutoring.

I spent 3 years in the UK
with my sister since I was 19.

When I came back,
my parents said

I should study IT,
there's a big demand.

So they steered you this way?

Yes.

After high school, I wanted
to take a gap year in the UK,

but when I came home all defeated,

my dad said: "My money, my decision".

-What did you do there?
-Caregiving, cleaning...

It made me realize
I really need a degree.

Do you really like IT, though?

Not really.

What would you have chosen?

Art School, but zero money there.

Not necessarily.

My friend graduated from
the Conservatory - always broke.

I mean if you really want something,

you have to jump in with both feet.

It may be hard,
but at least you tried.

So you'll have no regrets
because of fear.

Yes, but...

What a pretty dress!

Yes, very.

Any children, sir?

Don't "sir" me.

Sorry.
So, any children?

No.

Well, it's complicated.

Do you want to have any?

Yes, at some point.

-And you?
-I don't have any.

I figured as much.
Do you want any?

I think so.

I can see myself there,
but not yet.

-I still have plenty to do.
-Like?

Traveling the world,
having new experiences.

So, no children?

No. You?

No, but for me
it's kind of normal.

But you, sir... sorry...
You're older.

So I'm old?
That's why you call me "sir"?

No, but most men your age
are married and have children.

Maybe some men aren't married
and don't have children.

I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked.

My apologies, sir,
I'm the curious type.

Forgiven, if you stop calling me "sir".

-Sorry.
-No problem.

Ever been to the Athenaeum?

No.

Me neither.

Could you come to Bucharest
once-twice a week?

-What for?
-Tutoring.

I could do it.

After finals,
I'll have some time.

-I'll do it.
-Good then.

I suppose it's kind of far.

No, I can study on the train.

Still, it's a long ride...

I have an aunt here,
I can sleep at her place.

OK.

-I could come on the weekends.
-You sure?

Don't wear yourself out.

Yes, I'm sure.

-Only...
-What is it?

-How much do you charge?
-What?

Your fee.

-Be serious!
-Why?

I wouldn't ask for money.

No, I couldn't.

It would be my pleasure.

Besides, my mom would
disown me if I charged you.

-Hi, Ilinca.
-Hello.

Silviu is in the bathroom.

That's fine, I'll wait.

What are you reading?

Silviu, you have guests.

In a moment!

Good book?

Hi there.

Never mind that.

Let's go outside so Ilinca can read.

The story now starts
to pick up some steam.

Still, it's a first draft...

But this is pretty common, isn't it?

The character's decision
to go back to Irina

is no longer influenced
by a potential baby.

Now he's not staying
with her for the baby.

Interesting.

You're so selfish!

I share my heart with you and
you only care about your book!

Can you talk to me like a friend?
And not some dime store hack?

Can't I be both?

You really think
I'm a bad writer?

Your forte is sci-fi, not love stories.

So? You don't think I could?

I don't.

Ilinca!

Do you think I could
write a love story?

Yes.

More coffee?

Yes, please.

Ilinca, any coffee left?

No.

Nonsense!

There was some left,
she was joking.

What would you do if
you suddenly went broke?

-Like how?
-Like if you lost everything.

House, family, money...

-Friends, too?
-Yes.

I'd probably go to a...

A homeless shelter.
Why?

I was wondering what I'd do.

I'd raise chickens and
grow vegetables to eat.

You need money to raise chickens.

I would steal one.

You need land to grow vegetables.

I'd grow them in the park.

OK?

OK.

Got any cream?

-Hi.
-Hello, Petru.

I brought you these.

Want them in the fridge?

Thanks, I'll do it.

-Are you sure?
-Yes.

-Need anything else?
-No, thank you.

How are you feeling?

-Good.
-Good?

I just have to
take my medicine.

Well, be careful.

-See you, then.
-Bye.

Oh, I met with Rodica's daughter.

-How did it go?
-Good.

-Is she any good?
-She needs some tutoring.

She really wants to be admitted.
Can't you help her?

She'll come to Bucharest
so I can tutor her.

Is she pretty?

Yes, she's alright.

I saw her childhood pictures.
She was so cute.

Yes, she is... cute.

-Rodica is so proud of her.
-Of course.

-I hope she makes it.
-Me too.

Call me if you need anything.

-Thanks.
-You're welcome.

-Do you have a reason?
-I don't need one.

Why can't we start over?

I've been thinking.

You don't want
to live like you're 20,

you want to have a life,

but why can't we do it together?

The city quivered
under the warm morning light

when Petru asked Irina
for a reconciliation.

"I'll be more involved",
Petru said tentatively.

"We'll have a serious,
exclusive relationship."

But Irina was completely unimpressed.

"Petru, you can't have
a serious relationship!",

said Irina sharply.

"I want to love someone
and be loved back."

"You're incapable of affection."

What can I do?

Try being romantic.

-I can do it.
-You can't.

For example,
you never even got me flowers.

I'm not romantic because
I didn't bring you dead plants?

You see?
Not romantic at all.

Wait a minute.

Here.

You really don't get it.

Everything is in order.
Nothing to worry about.

But look.

Hemoglobin, RBCs and the HCT
are below normal.

Only a little.

You're a bit anemic.

Isn't that a problem?

It's not anything serious,
so why worry?

Because there's no metastasis?

It's only serious
if something needs to be chopped off?

We practice curative medicine.

If there's a problem, we fix it.

if there isn't, nothing to fix.

But sometimes I don't feel good at all!

And I had unprotected sex!

The lab results came out fine.

But there has to be some other test!

The only thing left
is a CT scan.

Oh, no! What for?

To see if you're right in the head.

Summer had brought new hope.

Even though he hadn't given up on Irina,

Petru enjoyed Sânziana's
company twice a week.

She had such charm.

Petru couldn't help but notice.

She was exactly his type.

She had a certain something
which made time stop for him.

The erotic tension between
them became unbearable.

That's fine.

-I'm not done.
-It's plenty.

I only finished 3...

It's fine for now.

This one's right.

This one isn't.

This one...

-Some coffee, water?
-No, thanks.

-Are you sure?
-Yes. Maybe later.

The third one is right.

As to the second question...
we know a complex number is 0

if and only if its real
and imaginary parts both = 0.

Which gives us...

a^3 - 3ab^2

- a^2 + b^2 - a - 1 = 0

Which means b equals?

-Zero.
-Yes.

So the real answer is 0.

Here, since you won't charge me.

Oh, please.

-It's just chocolates.
-Thanks, you shouldn't have.

-You waste so much time on me.
-Not true!

-I insist!
-Me too.

Thanks, but you shouldn't have.

-Please, it's just chocolates.
-Let's not be so formal.

-They're delicious.
-I'm sure.

-Thanks a lot, anyway.
-OK.

Going to your aunt's?

I'll take a walk
until my train leaves.

The weather is lovely.

-I'll kill a few hours.
-I'll come along.

-I'll give you a tour of the city.
-Please don't bother.

-Not at all!
-I'll manage.

-But I want to come!
-You really don't have to.

I have time.
I'll get my jacket.

OK. Thanks!

-Ready?
-Yes.

Now she wants me
to be romantic, to get her flowers.

To show I care.

You mean she has to ask you?

I don't get it.
To me they're dead plants.

But they're pretty.

Who started this
meaningless ritual?

Why not give women dead animals?

-It's the same thing to me...
-Stop it!

You can eat a dead chicken.

It would make more sense.

Yeah.

Just what women want,
dead chickens.

Just saying.

A Guinea pig, then, you can't eat it.

Just put it in a vase, whiskers up...

Cut it out!

Flowers are delicate,
they express how you feel.

How I feel?

I gave a lot of flowers
to my grade school teachers.

What was the feeling there?

I think they enjoyed them.

More than they would dead hamsters.

Butterflies.

How about dead butterflies?

Butterflies?
They're beautiful.

And it's much
harder to get one than a flower.

Then it's even more meaningful.

"I fought so hard to catch you
these 21 butterflies."

Alright then...
Chocolates!

How did they get in?

Under the eaves.
Now they're in my ceiling...

There's a gap of a few centimeters.

They must have nested in there.

I didn't hear a thing.

They're not there during the day.

They come in from the cold at night.

-Can't you go in after them?
-It's too small.

They woke me up 6 times last night.

Are you sure they're
pigeons and not rats?

You think it would be
better to have rats?

Just saying.

Should that reassure me?

Just wondering if you were sure.

Of course I'm sure.

Just the idea of a rat...

See?
It's just a pigeon.

Are you afraid of it?

Who said anything about fear?

-They're disgusting.
-Nonsense.

They're disease-carrying airborne rats.

It's just a stray pigeon!

Then move out.

I've lived here for 10 years!

If they don't let you sleep...

But this place is so cheap.

Then I don't know.

Can't you call some company?

Exterminators only handle
rats and cockroaches.

I found a website
with all kinds of poisons.

You want to kill them?

No, but they won't leave me alone!

They're just birds!

You don't get it.
Come hear them one night.

If I poison them and they die there,
they'll stink up the place.

-You're terrible.
-I'm the terrible one here?

What about them?

You try sleeping
at my place for one night.

These are not my words!

They are not mine either.

So how does this Sânziana look?

Great.

-Pretty, huh?
-Yes.

I figured as much.

And...

How is the tutoring going?

She's getting it, she's smart.

I can't help noticing that...

You spend an awful lot
of time together.

We just get along,
we talk about our lives.

I see.

Classes are over,
I have time on my hands.

I enjoy talking to her.

I'm sure.

Wouldn't you enjoy something
more than just talking?

No.

-Come on!
-I mean it.

We just get along,
there's nothing sexual.

I want to make up with Irina,
not chase students.

-What did I miss?
-Nothing. He's pining for Irina.

-Shocking.
-What do I get you?

A coffee.

No, wait. A beer.

No! A coffee.

No, a beer.

Hey! Make that a beer.

Another one who can't decide.

I felt like a beer,
but I had one already.

-Who do you play?
-The King's Officer.

Want to come?
I can get you in.

No, we're working on my book.

It already started.

And we'd rather
see you in a big part.

Any word from that audition?

Screw those douches.

Thanks.

So what's new with Irina?

Nothing.

I tried to negotiate
a reconciliation, but...

It seems I'm not romantic enough.

Not romantic? You?

Apparently just getting along
isn't enough.

Liking the same books
and films isn't enough?

-No.
-She's so selfish!

Unbelievable!

Don't make fun of me!

-Just kidding.
-Well, don't.

Keep talking, I'll take notes.

For now, it's up in the air.

I have to prove my feelings for her
extend beyond friendship.

So what do you feel?

-For her?
-Yes.

What do you mean?

I feel I want to make up,
be a real couple.

What you feel,
not what you want.

That's what I feel.

That's a want, not a feeling.

-So what do you feel?
-Listen.

Relax. Close your eyes.

Go inside, listen to your feelings.

I feel nothing.

Nothing?

Close your eyes.

Listen to your heart.

And what it wants.

What comes up?

What do you feel?

I feel a little nauseous.
I ate a cheese pie earlier.

He's empty inside.

Not empty.
He ate a cheese pie.

-Where is Pompiliu?
-Quiet!

I don't see you!

Shit, that's my cue.

...it has started to get dark!

-I'll be right back, you'll be here?
-Yes.

It's faster through the back door!

...then he will forever understand
the love I carry...

Want to go watch?

What, to see him
crossing the stage twice?

Why not?

We'll watch him if he gets that part.

Which means never.

Here I am!
The King's Officer!

Things didn't seem
to be going his way.

Irina was adamant,
he was increasingly confused.

He just couldn't understand
what was going on with him.

Why was he so unhappy?

And how could he find happiness?

This was one equation
he couldn't solve.

Did he know what he wanted?

Why couldn't he explain
his need to get Irina back?

His wise friends' advice
made him wonder.

I've exhausted
every single argument.

You want to win over a woman
with pros and cons?

I just want to prove that
the positive things outweigh the negative.

Wow!

When you're sick,
you take your medicine.

True, there may be side effects,

but would you prefer
diabetes or a stomach ache?

TB or light-headedness?

Cancer or...

the possibility of a migraine?

Why bring up cancer?

Our breaking up won't kill anybody.

-For some, loneliness is like a cancer.
-Right!

There's a study -
loneliness causes cancer.

Oh, really.

British and American
scientists have proven there's a link

between loneliness
and aggressive cancer.

They tested mice.

Only the isolated mice without families
got cancer.

-British scientists?
-American, too.

If that's what scientists believe,
then we have to make up.

We do.

Any studies on Math professors
who seduce their students?

You know I've never
slept with my students.

And Cristina?

I haven't been seeing her!

And she's not my student.

No other students in your lineup?

No!

-I don't sleep with my students!
-Only other professors' students.

I don't get modern art.

Is this a photo or a painting?

Why work so hard
when you could take a picture?

Is this wrapping paper?

I like it.

If it was,
could you tell it was art?

I actually like it.

I'm getting bored here.

I'm not.

The ones upstairs
are more interesting.

-The elevator is over there.
-Better for us to climb the stairs.

I can use some repellent.

But you would need one of those
rope climbing guys

to seal off the gap.

Won't the repellent keep them out?

I can't guarantee that,
we mainly deal with bugs and rats.

I'm not sure it works on birds.

Does the spray
repel them or kill them?

They should leave when we spray,
but if they nested there...

With baby pigeons...

-They'll die?
-I think so.

No guarantees, though.

Right.

If there were baby pigeons,
they'd be here during the day.

I see.

Have someone seal off the holes.

There could be a few.

Then we spray the repellent
and hope for the best.

I see.

Let's do it then.

Consider it done, sir.

Can't you do it today?

Not until next
Tuesday or Wednesday.

Tuesday?

-At nine?
-Yes.

Stay away that day, it's toxic.

Alright.

When the light comes on,
try to stand still.

if you get sick or dizzy,
push this button.

Hello.

Hi.

-I brought tools.
-Good, I didn't.

Then good thing I did.

Where's the patient?

-Want some tea?
-What kind?

-Green, black...
-No, it keeps me up.

You drink coffee all the time!

I have a long-standing
relationship with coffee.

-Your longest relationship.
-Yeah.

Right.

Want some?

Yes, please.

What happened to those
easy-to-peel tangerines?

They used to be so easy to peel.

Indeed.

Isn't it strange?

Maybe they're not ripe.

Yes.

Yes.

Back in your day...

Nowadays they pick them green,
and treat them

so they ripen on the way to the store.

They ripen on the boat.

Processed fruit.

I've heard
heat makes them ripen.

Should we microwave one
to see if it's easier to peel?

OK, thanks.

OK, you're welcome.

Fool!

Now that he was back with Irina,
he had to give Sânziana the big news.

The prospect of a solid relationship
made him happy,

though he was anxious
about meeting Sânziana.

Had he made the right decision?

What if he went down the wrong path,
right from the start?

The initial mistake you make
in solving an equation

will completely distort
your answer down the road.

Did he lie to himself in order to get
back together with Irina?

How could he know this was
the right solution to the equation?

He struggled like a headless chicken.

What will it be?

Coffee, please.

-How about some tea?
-No, coffee.

We're a tea house.

No coffee?

Yes, but we have excellent teas.

Tea, then.

What kind?

Any.

"Morning Bliss"?

-Great.
-Alright then.

-Sorry, got lost again.
-Don't worry.

-Been here long?
-A few minutes.

I have news.

-Me too.
-Great!

-You go first.
-No, you.

I'm dropping out.

Really?

I'm going to study art.

-You've decided?
-Yes.

Congratulations.

Thanks.
What's your news?

-I got back with Irina.
-You did?

Great! How?

I was very persistent and...

We kept meeting...

Cool!
I met someone too.

Oh?

He's a graphic artist
and teaches, too.

What does he teach?

Photography.

How old?

Turning 41.

And he's a Scorpio.

Takes gorgeous photos,
you have to see them.

I will.

He has an exhibition,
want to come?

Sure.

-Anything for you?
-A "Tropical Temptation".

Then I suppose
you won't need tutoring.

No, I won't.

Thank you.

It was my pleasure.

How's this for romance?

Thanks.

-Sugar?
-No, thanks.

-Did you sleep well?
-Yes.

-You?
-Me too.

Even with the pigeons?

I barely heard them.

Good.

Are you OK?

Yes, why not?

You didn't orgasm
last night either.

Don't worry,
I'll get used to it.

I suppose I'll come eventually.

-Did you enjoy it?
-Yes.

That's what matters.

Who could that be?

Hello!

I completely forgot!

How do we do this?

My partner will handle it.

I'm not so sure
I still want to.

I don't want to kill them
if they have babies.

-I told you.
-I know.

Maybe I'll find a better solution.

Then we don't kill them?

No.

OK, but...

This is for...

For coming here.

I'm sorry I held you up.

And for your partner...

Again, I'm terribly sorry.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.
He's not home, stay there!

-Who was that?
-The exterminator.

-You have mice?
-No, the pigeons.

You want to kill them?

No, I told him to leave.

Yummy.
Where did you get them?

The store downstairs.

Listen...

How about we move in together?

You think it's a good idea?

Since the pigeons
won't let me be anyway....

We can try it, if you want.

See how it goes.

Yes.

Good.

All done?

Yes, thanks.

What about the impotence issue?

I'm not impotent!

What should I call it?

Nothing!

It will be fine.

Let's hope so.

So you got back with Irina,

and Sânziana's dating a painter.

Photographer.

A photographer.

A 40-year old arts teacher.

Turning 41.

Right.

Not good.

Why not?

-Just not good.
-Why?

The story won't work.

What?

Think about it.

Our character wants to
break up with Irina.

-Because he's semi-impotent.
-Again?

Quiet.

She gets pregnant
and breaks up with him.

Now, for some reason,
he wants to make up.

But she gets an abortion.

Meanwhile he meets
hot chick Sânziana.

And various other women.

Then he makes up with Irina,

and Sânziana hooks up
with his alter ego.

-Right?
-Right.

So where does that leave us?

Nowhere. The end.

So what does the story mean?

Nothing, what do you want it to mean?

And how did you
contribute to the story?

As in?

It didn't matter if you
made up with Irina or not.

It was her decision.

Just like you could have slept with
Sânziana or the various others.

So?

I wasted two months on you
and your pointless story!

Did I ask you to?

What do you mean?
Spending time with us is a waste?

No.

Like you had anything better to do!

I could've written
a new kind of sci-fi novel.

So write it!
Let's see who reads it.

It will be a best seller.

I'm going high-concept.

-Sure.
-You'll see.

Enough with the sci-fi, let's go.

Catch!

-What was that?
-Great.

Great.

I thought you'd catch it.

Now what?

Now we keep going.

It's getting late anyway.

Let's get a beer,
it's so nice outside.

Let's!

Any word from that audition?

No. Screw them.

They cast Bucur again.

Sorry.

If they make a movie
based on my sci-fi book,

you'll play the lead.

And the leading character's name
is Andy. Andi!

And he's an actor.

Fine.

So do we go to our old place?

Where else?

We can sit outside.

And it's also close to home.

THE END

Translation by: Eugene Buica