Our Mutual Friend (1998) - full transcript

Eugene?

You naughty boy!

Where are you?

Playing out all night indeed!

You can't hide from me,

you bad, bad boy!

Clear the mounds,
clear off the evidence!

It won't make any difference!

I'll have you, Boffin!

Your destiny is downfall and I'M the
one who's destined to bring you down!

- Noddy, my dear.
- Yes, my dear?



Do you not think that maybe...
we have taken the wrong path?

Don't you worry, old lady.

It is a very large house, Noddy dear.

I am a little lonely in it.

We decided the way of our travels,
old girl.

Don't you worry yourself.

We'll make new friends

and all will end comfortably -
you'll see.

He's been hung onto pretty tight.

He's been in the grass...
and he's been in the water

and he's spotted
and I know with what

and I know with whose.

- Who brought him in?
- I did, sir.

You, my dear? You could not lift,
far less carry, his weight.



I think I could not, sir...
but I'm sure that I did.

Attend to the girl.

She must be amazingly strong
at heart,

but I fear that she's set her heart
upon the dead.

Is there something wrong, my love?

No, nothing.

- I was wondering...
- Yes?

Well, if one day...I might go
with you to the China House.

I'm afraid you would find my office
life in the city very boring.

No... It's just...I watch you pick
up your briefcase in the mornings.

I do not know where you go

or what you do
with whatever is in that case.

- Are you bored, Bella?
- Of course I'm not!

Our own dear house. There's so much
to do, how could I be?

You are not regretting it?

Hmm?

Having married no money at all?

Absolutely no future whatsoever!

You must not tease me!

It's clear I'm being tested
in some way,

but you will not break me!

No, you won't.

Morning.

Why, T'otherest, I thought you'd
been and gone and lost yourself.

Two nights away.

I almost believed
you'd given me the slip.

'Cept I knows you's an honest man
and a respectable schoolmaster.

Eat.

You must be starved after...
all your travelling.

I'm not hungry.

Watch out, T'otherest,
you'll cut your hand.

Well, T'otherest,

news has gone downriver before you.

What news?

Who do you think picked up the body?

Guess.

I'm not good at guessing anything.

SHE did.

You did well there, sir.

SHE picked him up.

She used her skills
to recover the body.

I intend to leave
as the sun goes down.

Perhaps it is fitting.

If my poor boy had been brought up
better, he might have done better.

You have no reason...
to reproach yourself.

It's so hard to bring a child up well
when you work, work, work all day.

I called him a quantity of names.

I did it for his own good.

I was obliged
to let him go in the streets.

He never did do well out of doors.

You have been very patient, Jenny.

If I had been patient,
I never would have called him names.

Well...I lost no time.

I know an urgent summons
when I sees it.

Before starting,

I have to ask we be in confidence.

I suppose that sounds fair.

I have your word and honour, sir?

Good fellow, you have my word.

How you can have that
without any honour, I don't know.

I've sorted a lot of dust in my time.

I never knew the two things
go into separate heaps.

Very true, sir...very true.

Mr Boffin...ahem...

..I have to confess...

..I fell into a proposal

of which YOU were the object
and oughtn't to have been.

Please remember I was
in a crushed state at the time.

Quite so, Venus.

That proposal was a conspiracy
against you, sir.

I ought at once
to have made it known to you,

but I didn't, Mr Boffin,
and I fell into it.

Not that I was ever hearty in it

and I viewed myself with reproach

for having turned
out of the paths of science

and into the paths of...Weggery.

Not a-killing of yourself,
schoolmaster.

Not afore I've squeezed
the last penny out of yer!

I see what you're doin'.

Trying to throw your crime on me.

Now, look here, Venus.

If I have to buy Wegg out,

I shan't buy him any cheaper
for your being out of it.

Might you...pretend to be in it

till Wegg was bought up,

then hand over to me what you'd
been supposed to have pocketed?

- No, no, I don't think so, sir.
- Not to make amends?

Well, it seems to me the best amends
for having got out of the square

is to get back into the square.

And by the square, you mean...?

I mean...the right, sir.

How am I to live

if I have to buy up fellows
out of the little I've got?

I s'pose there's no doubt as to the
genuineness and date of this will?

- None whatsoever.
- And where might it be deposited?

It's in my possession, sir.

Is it?

Now, for any liberal sum of money
that could be agreed, Venus,

would you put it in the fire?

No, sir, I would not.

Or give it to me?

That would be the same thing.

No, sir.

Hush!

Here comes Wegg.

Hide behind the young alligator
in the corner

and judge him for yourself.

Get your head well behind his smile.

He's a little dusty,
but he's very like you in tone.

Partner, how's our stock in trade?

Still safe, partner?

With all your ''friends''
a-watching over it?

Nothing new, Mr Wegg?

Yes, there is.

That foxy old grasper and griper!

- Mr Boffin?
- Mister be blowed!

Dusty Boffin sends his dust carts
at dawn

to wake me up!

He's clearing those mounds
to get the better of me.

When I see him
put his hand in his pockets,

I see
him taking liberties with MY money!

Flesh and blood can't bear it!

No, I'll go further!
A wooden leg can't bear it!

His nose shall be
put to the grindstone for it!

How shall you do that, Mr Wegg?

I propose to insult him openly!

Then if he offers a word in return,

I'll say ''Add another one to that,
you dusty old dog,

''and you're a beggar!''

I'll break him! I'll drive him! Put
him in harness - bear him up tight!

The harder he's driven,
the higher he'll pay!

And I intend to be paid highly,
Mr Venus, I promise you!

You speak quite revengefully,
Mr Wegg.

Perhaps I've allowed myself
to brood too much.

Be gone, dull care!

I'll be seeing you afore long.

But let it be fully understood

that I shall not neglect bringing
the grindstone to bear

and putting Boffin's nose upon it

until the sparks fly off in showers!

If I had hit him more from behind,
he would not have seen me.

If I had finished the job
before throwing him in the river,

he would not hover between life
and death as he does now.

Even now, he grinds me down.

Sir?

Sir?

- Dear child, will you never rest?
- It's not work.

I want to fix this young clergyman's
surplice while it is in my mind.

My poor boy's funeral might've been
of some service to me.

It's not to be a funeral doll
to be sure,

for people do not like
to be made melancholy,

but a glossy-haired clergyman.

We'll see him go well
in Bond Street, I'll wager.

Pardon me.
You are the dolls' dressmaker?

- Lizzie Hexam's friend.
- Yes. Lizzie Hexam's true friend.

My name is Mortimer Lightwood.

You must believe me when I say
that this note is from Lizzie.

She wishes you to read it.

It is very short.

There was no time to make it longer.

My dear friend Eugene Wrayburn
is dying.

He is dying at some distance
from here

from injuries received at the hands
of a villain who attacked him.

She is with him?

Yes. Yes, she's there.

I've come straight
from his bedside. He...

He managed to ask for you, Jenny.

Lizzie and I are both sure
he asked for you.

Poor Lizzie.

Oh, my poor Lizzie!

Please come.
He asked me to fetch you.

We have long been...
much more than brothers.

If we delay...he will die
with his last wish...unfulfilled.

He's still alive.

(MORTIMER) If he were gone,
she would still be sitting by him.

Come in, Hexam, come in.

Well...how is your new position?

Mr Headstone...
haven't you heard the news?

What news?

The news about that fellow -
Eugene Wrayburn.

That he is killed.

He's dead, then.

I mean I'd heard about the outrage,
but I had not heard the end of it.

Where were you when it was done? No,
stop! Don't answer! Don't tell me!

If you force your confidence upon me,
I'll give you up. I will.

I'll have nothing to do with you!

If your selfishness - passionate
and ungovernable selfishness -

had any part in this, you've done me
an injury never to be forgiven!

By pursuing the ends of your temper,
you've laid me open to suspicion.

Is that your gratitude to me?

You've no idea how long it's
taken me to reach this position.

I did not have your natural abilities.

- Your sister...
- I've done with my sister!

And I've done with YOU!

My prospects are very good.
I intend to follow them alone.

Whatever happens, I hope you'll see
the justice of keeping clear of me!

You might think how respectable
you might've been yourself.

I will contemplate
your slighted existence!

Mortimer...

..I must...

Lizzie?

- I'll fetch her. She's nearby.
- No... She...

This...attack...

..Mortimer...this murder.

You and I both suspect someone.

(EUGENE) He must never
be brought to justice!

Eugene...

SHE would be punished.

Her innocent reputation.

I've injured her enough.

I would've injured her more,
believe me.

You...must...not...avenge me

at her expense.

Listen to me!

It was NOT...the schoolmaster
Bradley Headstone.

Promise me!

It is true that
both my secretary and my ward

proved ungrateful enough to leave
me and Mrs Boffin stranded here

in this grand house all alone.

Noddy, dear...

I'm afraid the old lady
is uncomfortable.

No, no, no.

Y-Y-You see, it really won't do.
She doesn't care to lead you on.

Either of you.

And I suppose
it's safe for me to assume

that you was hoping to...er...fill
these vacancies in our household?

You and your wife

have done me and the old lady
a great service.

We mean to reward you. We think...
a hundred guineas should do it.

Now...

..as for your filling any position
in the house...

..I'm afraid it won't do.

- But, Mr Boffin...
- No, it really won't do at all.

Let the old fool fend for himself.

There'll be plenty more jackals
sniffing round here tonight.

How long will this last, Mortimer?

You're no worse than you were.

I pray...

..I shall last long enough...

..for you to do me one last service.

Tell me what it is
you want me to do, Eugene.

Try to be calm.

You may leave me with Jenny...
while you're gone.

Leave me here with Jenny
while you ask her...

What is it you want me to do,
Eugene?

Eugene...listen to me.

Were you about to ask me...
if I would speak to Lizzie?

Were you about to ask me

if I would entreat her
to be your wife?

God bless you, Mortimer!

Trust it to me, Eugene.

I have to go for a while.
I'll leave you with Jenny.

Was that a kiss, Jenny?

Take care, sir,
or you will not merit another.

Mr Lightwood.

Forgive the hour, Mrs Rokesmith,

but I have come from Lizzie Hexam

with the hope that you'll come back
with me to see her marry.

Then Mr Wrayburn is recovering!

No. No, he's dying.

Time is of the essence,
Mrs Rokesmith.

There is my husband.

Take some refreshment, Mr Lightwood,

and then we'll all go down together.

We have a surprise visitor, my love.

I fear Mr Lightwood is much fatigued.

Mr Lightwood?

John dear...

..you will come with me to see
Lizzie Hexam married?

No, I cannot.

- Am I to go alone?
- No, you will go with Mr Lightwood.

You must go, but I must ask you
to excuse me to him altogether.

He knows you're home.
I've told him so.

That's a little unfortunate, my dear,
but I'm afraid I cannot see him.

John, don't be so mysterious.

What harm do you know
of Mr Lightwood?

None, my love.

Forgive me.

Bella...

..my life!

Do you remember telling me you felt
you were being tested in some way?

Well, I think the time may be coming
when you will be tested.

But for now...trust me, please.

It is curious that
I've never seen Mr Rokesmith,

although we've often been engaged
on the same business.

I begin to think
I shall never see him.

That IS curious, Mr Lightwood.

There...we're ready.

(PRIEST)
Inluminet vultum suum super nos

et misereatur nostri,

ut cognoscamus in terra viam tuam,

in omnibus gentibus salutare tuum.

Confiteantur tibi populi, Deus,

confiteantur tibi populi omnes.

Laetentur et exultent gentes,

quoniam iudicas populos in aequitate

et gentes in terra diriges.

Confiteantur tibi populi Deus,

confiteantur tibi populi omnes.

Terra dedit fructum suum

benedicat nos Deus Deus noster.

Benedicat nos Deus

et metuant eum omnes fines terrae.

I bless the day.

I bless the day.

You have made
a poor marriage, Lizzie.

A shattered, graceless fellow...

..and next to nothing to leave you
when you're a young widow.

I have made the marriage
I would've given all the world for.

You have thrown your heart away.

No...I have given it to you
most freely...most happily.

If... If you should see me
wandering, Lizzie...

..call my name...

..and I think I shall come back.

How can I repay...all that I owe...

Don't be ashamed of me...
and you will repay all...

Eugene, not so soon!

Come back!

You see...you call me back
from the dead.

Live for me, Eugene. Live to see how
hard I will try to improve myself.

You cannot be improved upon,
my darling.

Impossible.

On the contrary...

..I was thinking...

..dying is about the best thing
I could do.

And leave me with a broken heart?

You seem to think quite well of me.

Heaven knows, I love you dearly.

Heaven knows, I prize it.

If I were to live...

..you might find me out.

I should find that my husband has
a mine of purpose and energy

which I know he will put
to the best account.

I wish I could think so.

But how can I look at such a wasted
youth as mine and believe it?

I'm afraid, if I were to live,
I should...disappoint you.

Thank you for coming, Mrs Rokesmith.

How could I not?

Mr Wrayburn seemed
a little better this morning.

We may hope.

Goodbye.

And how was Lizzie, my love?

Suffering an almost unbearable
happiness.

You forgot these...

Mr Lightwood and I
have met before, my dear.

When Mr Lightwood saw me...

..my name was Julius Handford.

Julius Handford? Surely not.

It was at the time
of John Harmon's drowning.

I took great pains to seek him out.

Quite true,

but it was not my object
or interest to be found out.

My... My position is a painful one.

I hope that no complicity
in this very dark matter

may be attached to you,

but you must know
that your extraordinary conduct

has laid you open
to the deepest suspicion.

Mr Lightwood, you know where I live.

I know that you have
urgent demands on your time.

You have my word
I will not disappear again.

I hope hereafter
we'll be better acquainted.

Good day.

John Harmon is dead!

What is it, my dear?

John Harmon is drowned.

You don't ask me, my dear,
why I...took a false name.

No, John love.

I should dearly like to know,
of course.

I should not like you to think
that I'm not interested.

My darling, I stand in no danger.

Are you sure of that, John?

Moreover, I've done no wrong
or injured no man.

- Shall I swear it?
- No.

No, never to me.

You realise...the dark matter
that Mr Lightwood spoke of...

- You realise...
- No. I don't want to hear.

Besides, I have...um...

I have something to tell you.

You are not the only one
with a secret.

Only I'm ready to tell you mine.

Do you think Wegg's likely
to drop down on me today, Venus?

I think it very likely, sir.

Boffin...you're quite a stranger.

- Nothing wrong, Wegg?
- No, nothing wrong.

Quite the contrary.

So...

..my friend and partner, Mr Venus,

gives me to understand

that you are aware
of our power over you.

First of all...
I'm calling you Boffin.

No ''mister'' and definitely no ''sir''.

Since you say it is to be so...
I suppose it must be.

I suppose it must be.

You are aware that you are
in possession of property

to which you have no right?

Yes.

You are desirous of coming to terms?

You'll throw in your mound

with a generous stake
and divide the lot into three!

- I shall be ruined.
- You'll leave me in sole custody.

When the mounds are cleared away,

that's when the final division
will be made.

I must keep this from the old lady.
She must not know.

Why should she not know?!

She's a dustman's wife once!
She can become one again!

- Eh?!
- Nose to the grindstone, Boffin!

Get to it!

Get to it!

(GUARD ) Boat train to Paris, France!

(GUARD ) Boat train to Paris, France!

(LADY TIPPINS) The boat train?!

The Lammles have been
exiled to Europe

to live like leeches off the scraps
of continental society!

(MRS VENEERING) What a disgrace!

(MR VENEERING) They deserve it -
for trying to live beyond their means.

What do YOU think, Mr Tremlow?

- No, a gentleman does not need...
- Don't ask Mr Tremlow!

He will never say a word
on the misfortunes of others

whatever the scandal!

(MR VENEERING) Outrageous scandal!

I never heard anything
more disgraceful!

I have something worse to tell you

and Mr Tremlow will not say anything
to us about this either!

Eugene Wrayburn
has disgraced his family

by marrying a female boat person!

- A woman of lower class?!
- A scandal!

(LADY TIPPINS) His father has
cut him off without a penny!

This social experiment
is doomed to failure!

(MRS LAMMLE) Do you smell
a little money, Alfred?

- Mr and Mrs Lammle. My husband.
- How do you do?

- Are you going to Marseilles?
- Yes, we are.

Mr Lightwood,
you say you have some information

concerning the murder
of Mr John Harmon.

But now the mystery is
you seem reluctant to divulge it.

It is concerning Mr Julius Handford.

Oh, yes...Mr Julius Handford

was followed
from this very police station

to his lodgings at Westminster

where he seems to have evaded
my man and disappeared.

Have you caught sight of him,
Mr Lightwood?

I fear so.

Do you recognise me?

I recognise you most certainly,
Mr Julius Handford.

John, what's happening?

Nothing can harm us, remember.

Can I have a private word with you,
Mr Handford?

Mrs Rokesmith knows she can have
no reason for being alarmed.

Really? Is that so?

Are you going
to charge me with a crime?

I charge you with being connected
with the murder of John Harmon.

No, sir, you cannot!

- I'll come with you.
- No, John, you don't have to go!

No...I choose to go.

Don't distress yourself.
I'll be back by morning.

Why, it smells
rather comfortable here.

I am rather comfortable, sir.

You don't use lemons
in your business, do you?

No. Will you partake, sir?

Will I partake?
Of course I'll partake.

Will a man partake who's been
tormented by dust carts...

..heaving to and fro 24 hours a day?

Don't let it put you out, Wegg.

You don't seem in your usual spirits.

If it comes to that, you don't seem
in YOUR usual spirits.

You seem getting on for lively

and you've had your hair cut
and you've fattened up.

Well, Mr Wegg, I can see
YOU'RE being whittled very low.

One might fancy you've come
to see the French gentleman

rather than me!

Why, you've had
the place cleaned up.

Yes...by the hand

of an adorable woman.

I presume the next thing
you're gonna do is get married.

To the old party?

The lady in question
is NOT an old party.

(Then the lady's objections
have been met?)

The objections HAVE been met

by the kind interference
of a new friend of mine.

He waited on the lady

and made the point that
if I would, after marriage,

confine myself to the articulation
of men, children

and the lower animals only,

it might help relieve
the lady's mind

of her feeling respecting
being regarded in a bony light.

It was a happy thought, sir,
which took root.

You seem flush with friends
at the moment, Venus.

Still...you may spend your fortune
how you wish.

I mean to travel.

The tough job is ended,
the mounds laid low.

The hour is come for Boffin to stump up.

You'll be late for the China House
if you're not careful.

The fact is, my dear,

I have left the China House

and I'm in another way of business.

And I-I must ask you this, Bella.

You've become fond of this cottage.

Well, of course I have.
It's our life together.

I'm afraid we have to leave, my dear.

My new position has a dwelling
house attached rent-free.

John...

Do you consider this a gain, my dear?

Yes, I do.

And what about the baby?

Will there be room
in the house for the baby?

There will, I'm sure,
be room for us all.

But why should you
take this on trust?

We will go and look at it
this morning.

John, what does this mean?

(BOFFIN) There, there, my dear.

Let's lift you up.

There.

Old lady, if you don't begin
a-telling of the tale,

someone else will!

I'm gonna begin, Noddy dear.

It isn't easy to know where to begin

when a person's
in this state of happiness!

Bella, my dear, tell me who this is.

- Why, my husband, of course.
- Oh, my!

His name, dearie.

- Rokesmith.
- No, it ain't. Not a bit of it.

- Well, Handford, then.
- No, it ain't. Not a bit of it.

His name IS John?

I should hope so, dearie!

Many's the time I'VE called him John!

Guess, my pretty.

- I can't guess!
- I could.

I found him out one night
in a flash, didn't I?

It was on a night
when he'd had a disappointment

about a certain young lady.

Too many's the time I'd seen him

sitting so lonely like that
as a child.

I just cried out, '"John...it's you!''

And he catches me
as I falls down in his arms.

John Harmon?

But that's not possible. He...
He is drowned!

Now, my dear, let me finish telling.

So I says to Noddy...

..''Lord be thankful!

''Here is our little John Harmon
come home again to us!''

And we both fall down crying for joy!

Do you see, my darling?
Can you understand?

These two, who I came to life
to dispossess and disappoint,

they cried for joy!

Oh, don't you mind him.

So John tells us about

his disappointment
with a certain...young person

and how he's gonna leave London

and let us keep
our wrongful inheritance.

And my Noddy,
well, you should've seen him.

To think that he'd come to
the property wrongfully

turned him whiter than chalk.

So we came to our confabulation
about a certain young lady.

Noddy says, ''She's a little spoilt,
but that's only on the surface.

''She true golden at heart.''

And then John says,
''Oh, if I could but prove so.''

And then we says,
''What would content you?''

''If she was to stand up for you
when you were slighted?

''If she was to be true to you

''when you were poorest
and friendless?

''And all this against any interest.
How would that do?'' ''Do?'' he says.

''It would raise me to the skies!''

We says ''Make your preparations

''for it is our firm belief
that up will you go!''

Noddy says, ''Bella was a little
frightened of me at first.

''She thought me a dusty
and a brown old bear!''

- Well, I...
- You did, my dear.

He says, ''What if I was
to BECOME that old bear

''she thought me once?''

'"John, '' he says, ''prepare to be
slighted and oppressed!''

And he began. Lord, how he began!

And you...proved yourself true

as we knew you would.

John wouldn't let us tell you.

He says ''She's so selfless
and contented.

''I can't afford to be rich yet!''

And so we go on.
Now the baby's on the way.

He says, ''I can't tell her now!''

And I said, ''If you don't tell her
as soon as you can

''so she can come into
her rightful home, then I will!''

Now...come, sir, and meet my gaze.

Come on, admit it!
You're a bad old bear!

Well, I did hope it might hint
at caution, my dear.

And I assure you that

on that celebrated day when I made,
which has since been agreed upon,

my greatest demonstration -

I allude to ''miaow'' says the cat,
''quack'' says the duck,

''bow wow wow'' says the dog

and John stares at me
as if I've gone a little strange -

them flinty words hit my old lady
so hard on my account,

I had to hold her hard

to stop her from running after you

and telling you I was playing a part!

Forgive me, my darling.

I was drowned...

..or as good as.

And as I lay by that river
gasping for air,

I thought I might as well be.

I had nothing left to live for.

And when you have nothing...
you are very bold.

I had nothing to lose by...
trying you out.

And when I did,
I found I had the best of friends

and the most worthy of wives.

And then this...new life
growing within you.

So when I did miraculously
have everything,

I was afraid to lose it

and determined to hold fast to it.

I couldn't risk telling you until
I had one more signal of your love

and then yet more and more.

Can you forgive me?

We might still be in Blackheath

had it not been for Mrs Boffin
and our friend, the Inspector.

(BELLA) I hope we do not have
to part with them again.

Mr Boffin...I thought you said
you'd dismissed this fellow.

No fellows here or I'll throw you
out of the window, you wretch!

Boffin, let's get down to business.
I want the room cleared of this scum.

That's not going to be done, Wegg.

Mr Venus, will you be so good
as to hand me over that document?

And now, sir, having parted with it,

I wish to make one small observation.

Not that it's necessary,
but it is a comfort to my mind.

Silas Wegg...
you are a precious old rascal.

Silas Wegg...
know that I took the liberty

of telling Mr Boffin
about our enterprise

at quite an early stage.

Though my hands were not,
for a few hours,

quite as clean as I could wish,

I hope I have made full amends.

- Certainly, Venus, certainly.
- Thank you, sir.

I'm much obliged
for your good opinion

and for the influence
so kindly brought to bear

on a certain lady

both by yourself and Mr John Harmon.

Everything else between you and me
is now at an end,

but I beg leave to repeat...

..you are a precious...old...RASCAL!

You're a fool.

You may go...

..and welcome.

Now, Boffin,
I'm 'ere to be bought off!

Now, buy me or leave me.

I think I'll have to leave you, Wegg.

I see how this goes.

You can afford to be so bold
now you have so much less to lose!

But Mr Harmon here -

ask him if he knows
what this piece of paper is.

It is a will of my father's
of a later date

than the one leaving the estate
to the Crown.

Right you are!

So...what is it worth to yer?

Absolutely nothing.

- You scoundrel!
- You're knocking my 'ead!

I mean to!

I'd give $1,000 to be able
to smash your brains out!

Let me show you something.

This is the last will of many
made by my unhappy father

and it leaves the entire estate
to Mr Boffin

excluding me altogether.

Mr Boffin found it
and it disturbed him beyond measure

so he buried it in the mound.

His intention being that
it should never come to light.

When he told me of this...
I urged him to recover it

and have it legally established.

So now you see
that this pathetic piece of paper

has no value whatsoever.

Now, you will listen to me!

We knew enough to persuade Mr Boffin
to lead you on to the last moment

so your disappointment
might be the heaviest possible!

Believe this,

I only possess my inheritance

through Mr Boffin, who insisted
that I should have my fortune

and HE his small inheritance
and no more.

I owe everything I possess

to the kindness and tenderness
of Mr and Mrs Boffin

and when I see a roundworm like you

presume to rise up
against these noble souls,

the wonder is
I don't twist your head off

and throw it out of the window!

I'm...sorry, Wegg, that...

..me and Mrs Boffin can't have
a higher opinion of you,

but...I shouldn't like to leave you
worse off in life than I found you

so...what'll it cost
to set you up in another stall?

Well, sir,

when I first made your acquaintance,

I had got together
a collection of ballads

which was, I may say, above price.

Well, then, they can't be paid for
and you'd better not try!

There was...a pair of trestles...

..umbrella...clothes horse...

I'll leave the sum to you, sir.

Come...here's a couple of pound.

Ahh, come on, Prince! Giddy-up, boy!

Don't let him get over-excited,
Mortimer.

Visitors bring up his spirits.

My father paid us a visit up here -
up the river.

Objected to his hotel, of course!

As you know, he's a younger cavalier
than me and an admirer of beauty!

He was so affable as to suggest that
Lizzie should have a portrait done,

which for him is like a paternal
benediction with gushing tears!

Our marriage
being so solemnly recognised,

I have no fear on that score.

And you are handling my puny
financial affairs so adeptly

that what little I have to call my own
will be more than I ever had.

Eugene...

..the schoolmaster.

- He's not suspected?
- No. Rest easy.

I have made sure the police
have lost scent of him.

I promise, Eugene.

But he still lives
and he did you dreadful injury

and I cannot help but feel
he should be punished.

No, Mortimer.

He does not live...

..and he did me a favour.

- A favour?
- Yes.

Oh, yes. Consider this.

Had he not attacked me,
I don't know what I would've done,

how I would've injured her

in my reckless passion.

Mortimer, listen, listen.

I would have lost her respect.

Any possibility of our love would've
gone for ever. Consider that.

And consider what I have now.

And then tell me
whether the schoolmaster lives

if not as some...ghost
between here and hell,

knowing as he does
that he brought us together.

You think he does not have
punishment enough?

Begging your pardon, sir,
but where might I be?

Why, this is a school, sir.

Ah. And...who might teach
at this school?

I do.

What, you're the master?

Yes, I am the master, yes.

And a lovely thing it must be -

to teach young children like these
what's right

and to know that they learned
what's right by YOUR example.

Might I ask a question
of these lambs of yours?

If it is educational, yes.

Oh, it is that.

Tell me, young sirs,

what sorts of water
do we find on land?

(BOYS) Seas...

..rivers...lakes...ponds.

And, my lambs,

what is it that they catch

in these lakes and rivers and ponds?

- Fish.
- Yes. But what else?

- Weeds?
- Ye-es.

But I'll have to tell you what else.

I bet you won't guess.

It's a bundle of clothes!

Bless me if I didn't catch
this one in a river by me.

You see, it had been
sunk there by a man who wore...

How do you know that?!

Because I was watching him

and I saw him.

And, do you know...

..for some reason...

..I think that man
fetched up in this school.

Yes, I believe I know him.

Beg that you may tell
that man that I wish to see him

at my lock upriver.

Yes, I'll tell him.

Do you think he'll come?

I'm sure he'll come.

Come in, sir.

And who may you be?

I've come from the Harmon household
for the nursery dolls.

- My name is Sloppy.
- Indeed?

I've been looking forward
to meeting you.

I've heard of your
distinguishing yourself.

Pretending to be a phantom!

Pitching somebody
into scavenger carts!

Oh, yes, Miss!
I was that frightening!

What do you think of me?

Out with it! Don't you
think me a little comical?

Oh!

What a lot! And what a colour!

Enough to make wigs
for all the dolls in the world!

You must've been
taught for a long time.

You work so neatly
and with such...taste.

I never was
taught a stitch, young man!

No? Here's me been learning
and learning at my cabinet-making

with Mrs Boffin paying for so long!

I could make you something
if you like.

Much obliged...but what?

I could make you a handy
set of nests to lay the dolls in

or a set of drawers
for your silks and threads.

Or I can make you a rare handle
for your father's stick.

It belongs to me.

I'm lame.

I'm glad it's yours.

I'd rather ornament it for you

than anyone else.

You'd better see me use it.

It seems you hardly need it at all.

What a volume...

..and such a tone!

So I'm here.

Who's to begin?

Well, where's your watch?

I left it behind.

I want it.

I mean to have it.

Is that what you want from me?

Look here, schoolmaster,

you could've dealt with Wrayburn
without my care having a curse.

But when you copy my clothes...

..my neckerchief, shake blood on me,

you make as if to throw
the whole crime on me.

You'll pay me and you'll pay me
heavy, you sly devil!

I was playing your game long ago

before you tried
your clumsy hand in it.

When you stole away,
I steals after you

and I sees you throw
these bloody clothes away

and here, then, is proof.

I'll be paid for it
till I've drained you dry!

You can't get out of me
what is not in me.

You've had more than two guineas
off me already.

Do you know how long
it takes me to earn such a sum?

I don't know and I don't care.

You'll have to pawn
every stick you own,

beg and borrow every penny you can.

I'll keep you company
wherever you go till I'm satisfied!

This is all the money I have.

Say I give you this and my watch

and, when I draw my salary,
I give you a portion and...

You got away from me once.

I won't take a chance again.

I'm a man with absolutely
no resources but myself.

I have absolutely no friends.

Come, come, master,

you can't be rid of ME.

I'm a-going along with you
wherever you go.

It's no use, schoolmaster,

you'll never be free of me.

Let go! I'll get my knife!

It's no use! You can't drown me!

A man that's been brought back
out of drowning

cannot be drowned again!

Well, I can be!

And I'm resolved to be!

And I'll hold you living
and I'll hold you dead!

AHHHHHH!

Put 'em down here. That's it.

Now that I have the energy, Mortimer,

I've been thinking about the future.

I've had the idea of taking Lizzie
to one of the colonies -

working at my vocation there.

I shall be lost without you.

- Maybe you're right.
- No, I would not be right.

Makes me angry to think
I could turn coward on Lizzie -

sneak away with her
as if I were ashamed of her.

(MORTIMER) That's well said,
of course, Eugene, but

...are you sure that you might
not feel some slight...coldness

towards her...on the part of...

..well...society?

Yes, you may well stumble
on that word, Mortimer!

Now, listen to me, Mortimer.

My wife is somewhat nearer
to my heart

than society is.

So if I should ever think
to hide her away,

then YOU, who I love next best
in all the world will tell me

she would've done better
that night I lay bleeding to death

to turn me over with her foot
and spit in my face.

Go and find out what society
thinks of me, my dear fellow,

if it will make you feel any better.

As for myself...

..come hell or damnation...

..I really couldn't care less.

Really, Mortimer,
as you refuse to join our debate,

we've had to bring it to you!

A debate...
on such a pleasant evening.

Our debating question was,

does a young man of very fair family,

good appearance and some talent

make a fool

or a wise man of himself
by marrying a...female waterman

turned factory girl?

That is hardly...the question.

Which is, I believe,
whether the man who you describe

does right or wrong

in marrying a brave woman?

I say nothing of her beauty.

Excuse me.

Was this young woman ever
a...a female waterman?

Never, but she might sometimes
have rowed in a boat with her father.

Has the young woman got any money?

No...absolutely nothing!

Well, then my gorge rises
against such a marriage!

It offends and disgusts me!

It makes me sick!

(MRS VENEERING)
There must be equality in station.

A man accustomed to society

must look out for a woman
accustomed to society.

And what if the man
does not care for society?

Mr Tremlow, you are so small,
I had forgotten you.

You never say a word,
always silent as a mouse.

Come now, speak up
and tell us what you think!

I am disposed to think
that this is a question

of the feelings of a gentleman.

A gentleman who contracts
such a marriage has no feelings!

Pardon me, sir, but I don't agree.

If this gentleman's feelings
of gratitude, of respect,

of admiration, of affection,

induce him to marry this lady...

- Lady?!
- Why, yes, sir.

What else would you call her
if the gentleman were present?

I say again,

if this gentleman's feelings
induced him to marry her,

then...he is the greater gentleman
for the action...

..and she is the greater lady.

Time for one more...
before we go back?