No Time for Love (1943) - full transcript

Miss Grant, when Mirror
Magazine gives you an assignment...

- Very well, I resign.
- Hallelujah Miss Grant...

- Mr. Christley...
- Very busy.

- Yes Christley?
- Miss Grant is resigned again.

Christley Miss Grant never
resigns without provocation.

What have you been doing this time?

Isn't it within a managing editor's domain...

tell a member of his
staff that her work stinks?

It is, if the accusation is true.

But you're well aware that
Miss Grant is among the foremost...

women photographers in this country.



Yeah, yeah, yeah, but she doesn't make sense.

Remember furthermore, that you're
speaking of the woman I hope to marry.

All right, all right, now look...

I appreciate that we're supposed
to be running a class picture magazine.

But when there's a legitimate chance to
slip a little leg art into the world today...

and she comes back with this,
I don't know what to say.

Yes, well, well...

What, what was her assignment?

Backstage at the ballet.

Not a sign of a dancer in
tights, not a leg, not even a foot.

Christley, you've been
informed that Miss Grant may...

photograph her assignments as she sees fit.

The point is her
assignment isn't in the pictures.

Now you're quibbling.



Please telephone Miss Grant
and apologize immediately.

- For what?
- You know we can't afford to lose her.

And we regret losing you.

Sometimes I feel like you must feel.

Aren't you carrying art
a little far, even as a hobby?

Did you ever see an
exciting photograph of an egg?

Honey, the only time an egg can
excite me is when I'm hungry.

Katherine Grant Studio,
this is her sister speaking.

- Oh, just a minute. The monster.
- I'm busy.

One minute please.

Come on, let the
man apologize, so you can stop...

fooling around with a
tired egg and get back to work.

I don't need that job,
there are other places...

Where the managing
editor won't try to conceal...

his own ignorance by belittling my work.

Oh, you'll break Henry's heart if
you don't go back. Come on, be a sport.

Yes?

Miss Grant, on behalf of my wife
and three children who must eat...

I apologize for what I said this
morning and beg you to return to work.

Are you insinuating you were
forced to make this call by Mr. Fulton?

Oh, I only know what I know.

Mr. Christley...

I defy you to prove that I've ever taken
advantage of my friendship with Mr. Fulton.

I ask for no soft assignments,
no special courtesies.

I see.

- May I take you at your word Miss Grant?
- Naturally, why?

Well, the Interborough Vehicular
River Tunnel Project is well underway.

Would you care to crawl into the hole and
point your talented camera at what goes on?

You mean under the river
while they're still digging?

Mr. Christley, you know that
that's not my type of photography.

Perhaps later, when the tunnel
is finished and there's an opportunity...

to achieve some geometric
patterns with lights and shadows.

But the point is, my dear young lady,
that there wouldn't be any tunnel...

if it weren't for the men who are risking
their lives in creating it right now.

We're interested in them, not the walls.

Of course, if you demand some preferred
assignment, naturally I'm helpless to...

All right, all right. I told you
I'll take whatever I'm assigned...

regardless of the childish,
revengeful spirit behind it.

You go ahead and make
the necessary arrangements.

And don't forget to feed your wife.

You're in again?

In is right, in a hole under the East River.

- Photographing all those groundhogs?
- Sandhogs.

Will you tell me why it's become
a crime to photograph inanimate beauty?

Why must there be only crossed legs
and rouged faces and grime and sweat?

But don't look at me
I had a bath this morning.

Now we're under the river.

Before we reach the point
at which the men are working...

we have to go through the compression tank.

Some people collapse at that
point and others on the way out.

Do I have my choice?

We're all subject to the bends,
nitrogen bubbles in the blood stream.

That's from the high
pressure we have to maintain...

to equalize the water pressure around us.

Liberty boat.

Let's get going.

- Let me take your things Miss Grant.
- No thanks, I always pay my own way.

Hurry up, I got a date with an
angel in a dive on Second Avenue.

- Who's that?
- Guess they're getting short of men.

Visitor Mike, take it easy.

Ok Mike.

Well, I don't feel the difference.

The only place you'll feel it is in your ears
if you do hold your nose and blow like this.

It's like deep sea diving.

We increase the air pressure
in this tank until equals...

the pressure under which
the men are working in the tunnel.

- Could I take a picture of this?
- Help yourself.

Give me the heading.

Come on you apes, come on get me up right.

Come on, come on, come on.

- Get right, come on.
- On the phone.

Hello.

Moran, stick your ear
into the phone and listen.

- I'm bringing a woman down.
- On the company's time?

Stop clowning, she's a
photographer from Mirror Magazine and...

is going to shoot some
pictures of the men working.

So, for the love of mud,
have them watch their language.

- What's the temperature in here?
- Way over 100.

Quiet down.

Quiet. Quiet. Quiet, up there.

When I say quiet, I want it quiet.

Listen you fatheads, there's a lady
coming down, so the cussing is out.

If you can't talk
without cussing, then make faces.

What's the idea of bringing a dame
down here? Don't they know it's bad luck?

- I'm getting out while I got my health.
- If we had brains, we'd all get out.

You can suit yourself about that...

but whatever happens, keep your snouts out
of the gutter, you muck covered baboons...

or I'll kick you out
of your hairy hides and throw...

Moran.

Mr. Taylor...

the men say they won't work
while there's a woman in the tunnel.

It's an old superstition,
there's nothing I can do about it.

They're a jinx underground,
we ain't inviting trouble.

Well, I'm sorry, I didn't realize.

You see, they told me that this was where I'd
find real, honest to goodness fearless men.

Nobody mentioned anything
about superstitious children.

Well, you heard what the lady said, come on.

Back to work, back to work.
Come on, come on, come on.

- And mind your language.
- Thank you very much.

Mr. Morrisey, might I have your
assistance with this slave bracelet?

Mr. Hanagan, it's a pleasure to help you.

- And it's my turn to carry the heavy end.
- Thank you Mr. Hanagan.

- What you expected?
- It's like small time vaudeville.

Easy, easy.

Little over this way.

Lower. Lower.

Little more, little more, that's it.

Pard me, what do you do?

- I'm a butterfly presser.
- I mean what's your title?

No titles down here, we're all democrats.

- What do you want?
- Would you like to pose for me?

- I didn't bring my butterflies.
- Now look, you needn't be cute.

I just need a fairly human
model for some pictures.

That's out, my mamma done told me.

Ryan...

I suggest you cooperate with Miss Grant, the
president of the company seen fit to do so.

- Maybe she's his type.
- Listen, you...

- Hey Ryan, get to it now.
- Pard me folks, work.

I'm sorry Miss Grant.

Oh, that's all right, after all the sun
isn't shining and he's a groundhog.

Come on, lean on it boys.

Listen Superman, for two bits I'd slug
that big yap of yours shut so tight...

Shut up, both of you.
Stand back, take it away.

Ok.

Take it easy, that's it.

That's it.

Here it comes Ryan.

Look what's down there.
Hey Jack, Willie, pipe the Jane.

- How about looking up here.
- So we can see your kisser?

- What you doing Thursday night?
- Hiya babe, how about taking my picture?

Mr. Taylor, can he lean a little farther out?

Ryan, lean out a little
more, make it look good.

- A little more.
- Little further Ryan.

I can't see her face,
but she looks kind of cute.

Hey, watch the plate.
What you doing up there?

- Miss Grant, are you hurt?
- No, no, I'm all right.

Fast thinking miss, but
now they know you're a jinx.

All right men, get him into compression tank.

Three of you, easy now,
may have busted something.

- You better go with them.
- All right, get that plate back in place.

- My camera.
- Come on, come on, get back to work.

Where you think you are, you baboons?

Why didn't you watch
what you doing? Come on, back to work.

- Ok punks, get back inside.
- Come on, break it up.

Ok, take it away.

Get me the clinic.

Moran speaking, had an accident.

- You think he'll be all right?
- Lady, he's an Irishman.

He's either all right now or he's dead.

It was all my fault.

Hadn't been for you
that nutcracker had beaned him.

- But you should've stood out of the tunnel.
- Here comes Ryan, come on, quit stalling.

Shake your head and see what happens.

Nothing loose.

Are you still here?

Is that the thanks she gets
for saving your no good life?

Eh?

Who do you think rolled you out
of the way of that powder puff?

- She did?
- She did.

- A man can't turn his back with that.
- Thanks.

If you'd quit showing off in front
of skirts, you wouldn't be taking spills.

Who was showing off?
She asked me to lean out, didn't you?

I didn't mean for you to lean that far.

Pay no attention to him lady,
you big, bull headed goof.

Trying to blame a woman
for them mud barges he calls feet.

One more crack from any
of you and you get a free lump.

Jiggers kids, Superman is getting sore.

Maybe he thinks the lady
is going to save him again.

Oh, here gentlemen.
Oh no, help, help, help, help.

Help, help. Oh help, help.

Now, who was saying what?

Hiya Doc.

Hey, it's the Doc with the checker.

Clancy, Clancy, the Doc with the checker,
Morrisey, Morrisey, come on, Morrisey.

The Doc and the checker, come on, get up.
Put him on the bench, right there.

Come on Morrisey, come on.

Come on, sit down.

What about that one?

Oh Pete, wake up Pete.
Pete come on, wake up Pete.

Come on, Morrisey.

- Let's put him on the bench.
- Breathe deep, that's right.

The Doc and the checker,
let's put him on the bench.

- Hiya men.
- Hi.

- You're bleeding.
- Don't tell a soul or I'll get fired.

Confidentially, I was in a fight.

Funny, the way the
doctor got the wrong patient.

You men are quite loyal
to each other, aren't you?

Against outsiders.

Oh, you can take the chip off your shoulder.

I'll be out of here in a few
minutes and I don't expect to return.

There's no chip.

I still don't think you're a jinx, but you're
just not my type of dame, that's all.

Type of dame?

You've been on the
prowl ever since you met me.

- Aren't you old enough to know it?
- What?

Why, you conceited ape.

Maybe there's something
about you I could like, I don't know.

Right now I'm booked solid so I figured I'd
wise you up that you're wasting your time.

End of the line.

You, you're living proof that
men can exist without mentality.

Is it actually within the limits
of your exalted ego to believe...

that a woman of education and love
of the finer graces could fall for you?

- I don't get all that.
- May I put it this way?

At home, in my bedroom,
I have an inanimate object...

a chair that has 10 times more
quality and character than you.

- A chair?
- A chair Mr. Groundhog, good day.

A chair?

- Hey mush mouth, this belongs to the lady.
- You run, you can catch her.

Hey, wait a minute,
I'll see that she gets it.

- How about a ride back?
- No dearie, you're too knobby.

Well, next time I'll...

- Safe to come in?
- Yes, all right.

I'm dying to see the ape, can he talk
or is he just grunt and make signs?

Wait till you see his picture.

A mental throwback to the alphabet soup era.

Maybe we could put him
under contract and exhibit him.

King Kong, looks as
though he'd eat his own folks.

That's a good picture,
the lighting on the shoulder.

Yeah, I'll say it is. Wait, I call the mob.

Oh no, Hoppy.

Hey, come see what Kate found in a hole.

- A mouse?
- Oh, where?

- No, the abysmal brute, come on.
- What? What is it? Come on.

- Ladies and gentlemen, It.
- What is it?

It's a tableau representing
the brotherhood of man.

It's one sandhog against the world, the world
being the other three sandhogs he knock-out.

- He did all that alone?
- He's sweet.

Well, he's the nearest thing to
primordial man I've ever encountered.

And the one encounter was more than enough.

But, Kate, one can't be expected
to have all those muscles and think.

Well dear Christley wanted you to photograph
life in the raw and you've given it to him.

With onions.

Christley is not getting
that picture for publication.

Why not?

Well Henry, if that were published
those men would lose their jobs.

I don't want to be responsible for that.

Excuse me.

You know Beneath her exalted
exterior there actually beats a heart.

Oh?

- You left this in the tunnel.
- Oh thanks, I was going to phone.

While I'm here I'd like to see that chair.

- What chair?
- The one is better than me.

Oh?

Well, perhaps I was exaggerating a little.

I can decide that, just show me the chair.

All right.

- This?
- That.

- What do I owe you?
- An apology.

A chair is supposed
to be made to sit on, I sat.

I'm not speaking about the chair,
you made certain remarks today.

I rather hear about the chair.
What was it you said?

That it had 10 times
more quality and character than me?

- Had is right, will you go now?
- You kind of spoiled my supper tonight.

When a guy gets a feeling he
knows a little about women and...

then along comes something like
you, puts him right back in short pants.

How was that chair better than me?

Well, it had grace
and quiet dignity and beauty.

Oh?

- Naturally you don't understand.
- I think you're talking through your ears.

Like I said, a chair is made to hold
people up, that one couldn't, I can..

Put me down this minute.

If you want to leave a chair,
you get up and walk away from it.

Try and get away from me.

If you don't let me go I'll scream for help.

- Now you got something to scream about.
- Oh you, you coward, kissing a woman.

What am I supposed to kiss?

Well, feel better now.
I got my long pants on again.

Wait a minute, what do you insinuating now?

- Why didn't you scream?
- I'm no child.

I see you're not but
I don't think you know it.

No, I might get interested, so long.

- Superman.
- Mr. Ryan, of all the conceited...

Look everybody, see, see what I found.

- Isn't he gorgeous? Superman.
- Mr. Ryan, these are friends of mine.

And this is Mr. Ryan, the
sandhog you saw in the pictures.

- He just came to return a tripod.
- In the bedroom?

Well, couldn't he
return it in the living room?

- Miss McDonnell Mr.Ryan.
- Hello.

- And my sister Miss Grant.
- How do you do?

Mr. Fulton, the publisher of Mirror Magazine.

- How're you?
- Mr. Dunbar, the playwright.

- How do you do?
- Hello.

Mr. Kent, the,
and Mr. Roger Winant, the composer.

Kate was telling us how you
destroyed local 908 of your union today.

Only three.

Oh, don't be bashful man, we
know there must've been a dozen.

- I said there was three.
- Were three chum.

Thanks doll face.

But you haven't a mark,
did you blow them down?

Oh, leave him alone.

My dear, do you think
we could harm this Viking?

Perhaps Mr. Ryan would
like to enlarge on the gory details.

Great idea, act it out, will you?
While I'll give you some background music.

- That's enough.
- It's Ok babe.

- Well, if you really want to hear it.
- We're breathless.

- May sound sort of bragging.
- Oh, naturally.

- Well, as I said there were three of them.
- Weren't you frightened?

No, I always remember something
my father told me years ago...

he said if it's Saturday night
and a horse steps on your head...

get out of the
gutter because you're drunk, get it?

- Frankly, no.
- So, the three of them come charging in.

Clancy leads with his stomach, like yours.
So I hook him like that, only harder.

Then I grabbed the other two guys and
banged their heads together, like that.

After that we all had a beer and went home.

Oh, what does it say
in the book about head bandages?

So long.

So long kid, thanks for the laughs.

- Darling, I think you owe me an explanation.
- About what?

- About what happened in the other room.
- I haven't the slightest idea.

Oh, don't say that.

Which of the new plays interested you?
I see. No, I missed Abie's Irish Rose.

Have you read any good books lately?
Books? B - O - O - K - S.

Well of course, if you've no mind
to read, or even if you're of no mind...

Pard me your, your spoon, it's in your
coffee cup and it's likely to be in your eye.

So, at last he's driven you crazy.

- Oh hello.
- Dreams again last night?

Those liver pills didn't help, eh?

Well, as the brainy half of this sister act
it's up to me to pull you through the crisis.

But how the devil do you fight dreams?

- Hoppy, I think I have the answer.
- Honestly?

I've analyzed the situation
coldly and without prejudice.

What is upsetting me to the point where
I can no longer call my emotions my own?

Not the man himself but dreams about him.

Therefore, I've decided to
have such dreams when I'm awake...

and have some control over my mind.

You've been talking that way
since you were six years old.

- It must've been something Mother ate.
- You interrupted one of my conscious dreams.

Mr. Ryan is having breakfast with me.

I see, was something Mother ate.

You will note that Ryan is completely
without the glamor he assumed at night.

He's simply a muddy man
who works in a tunnel.

His shoes are dirty,
his napkin is tucked under his chin...

he goes blank when I mention books
and plays and he's utterly incapable of...

contributing to an intelligent conversation.

Pardon? Toothpicks? No, I'm sorry.

No. You have a cavity? Yes, yes, I see.

Certainly you may use your fork.

Oh hello Hilda, just pretend you're not here.

Doesn't he pick his teeth gracefully? Duck.

Aren't you glad I warned you?
The man is utterly without breeding.

If he did what I think he did,
I ought to kick his ears off.

Ah Hoppy, isn't it marvelous?
He's becoming revolting.

Great. Only how do you
know that's the way he actually is?

Well I...

Of course, it could be that you've imagined
him correctly, down to his last tooth.

So, if I am correct...

a few well chosen hours with the mug
would snap me out of this adolescent daze.

Hoppy, I'll deliberately
see him and make these things happen.

Well, I don't see that it's
necessary to carry things that far.

What if something went wrong? You're likely
to find yourself living in a tunnel for two.

I know what I'm doing and
I've faith in my own intelligence.

Well, I haven't and furthermore I...

Oh, answer that Hoppy, will you?
I'm going to make a phone call.

All right, all right, I'm coming.

Doorbells should ring once
and then electrocute the ringer.

Oh?

Won't you come in?

You know anything about this?

Go get your sister.

Ryan. Ryan, Ryan, Ryan...

Like rabbits.

I can't find him...

you think he might be listed in
the business directory under sandhog?

- He's in the living room under his hat.
- He is?

Hey, I thought your approach
was to be strictly scientific.

- What do you suppose he wants?
- Well, I think there's been a mistake.

A mistake?

Hello.

- Sweet kid.
- What's the matter?

You knew I'd be in a jam
the minute this picture was printed.

But to make yourself look
good on the job you're willing to...

turn it in and get
me four months' suspension.

- How did they get this?
- Look, if I want acting, I'd go to a show.

But I swear I had nothing, Hoppy...

Mr. Ryan, before you make any accusations
you should be ready to prove your statements.

You took the picture, didn't you?
For that magazine, wasn't it?

So now, at a time when I need
every cent I can get, along comes this...

- and I get tossed out on my ear.
- Hoppy.

Coming Sister dear.

- Well?
- Nice, isn't it?

You knew this particular picture was
not to be released. Now, who got it?

- Henry.
- But why didn't you tell me?

After the way this gorilla cracked
Henry's skull he had every right to print it.

Who does he think he is anyway,
barging into people's apartments uninvited?

Keeping them awake nights.

- Awake nights? What are you talking about?
- Why certainly, she hasn't...

She she's hysterical.

Mr. Ryan...

I was not responsible for the publication
of this picture, I want you to believe me.

Ok, doesn't help anything,
but I'll take your word for it.

Of course, I was involved to the extent of
taking it and not destroying the negative.

Forget it.

But you've been suspended at a time
when you say you need money badly.

- If it's a question of going hungry...
- Who's going hungry?

- You're into tossing charity my way?
- No.

I'd like to offer you a job for
the duration of your suspension.

- Working for you? Like what?
- Well I, I've certain plans.

I get it Lady I told you
once I don't want to play.

If you want to buy some muscles
go out and get a cheap cut of beef.

Why, you...

Listen you big ape, I'm not
interested in your nauseating charm.

- I was offering you a job.
- What can I do around here?

Well, you could carry
heavy equipment, couldn't you?

With the proper training you might even learn
to turn on a light by snapping a switch.

No posing?

No Mr. Ryan, you have my permission to
conceal your magnificent figure at all...

times, under an
overcoat and three heavy blankets.

Man is got to be careful
these days, what's the pay?

- What were you getting?
- 150 a week.

- Well, naturally that's...
- I know, what can you afford?

Say, 35? Forty at the most.

Well, I wouldn't take the job if I
didn't figure you owe me something.

I'll start at 35 and
find out if I'm worth 40.

- That's a deal.
- What do I do first?

Take off your hat.

Backstage at the
Marquis theater, sounds good.

A day in the lives of 40 little
bleached, arrested mentalities.

It's a wonderful assignment.

- People like to know about them.
- What people?

- You, for instance?
- I already know.

Oh, naturally.

Ryan, I hope there's no need
to warn you about any horseplay.

- Remember, we're here on business.
- Yes, teacher.

You can do without the
humor, especially when it isn't.

You wait here while I get the stage manager.

- Mr. Ryan Mr.Sweetzer.
- How you do?

- Hello.
- Now let's see, give me the camera.

- Say, that's quite an effect, isn't it?
- Yes, it is.

Back home we call a rope.

Believe it or not, you
were trying to catch a streetcar.

If you can spare the time Mr. Ryan,
there's some work to be done.

Visitors, girls.

Girls, this is Miss Katherine Grant and...

- Hello.
- Jim Ryan, hi.

These people are from the Mirror Magazine...

and I want you to give
them your fullest cooperation.

- Mirror Magazine.
- Oh, wonderful.

- If you should need me Miss Grant...
- We won't.

- I'll be right down the hall.
- Thank you very much.

Hello Mr. Ryan, are you
going to skip poor little me?

Not if I can help it.

Oh?

You for me.

- Oh, I'm just crazy for Mirror Magazine.
- Yes?

- Give me a break, will you beauty?
- What a job? Sure thing, cushions.

Ah, the name is Darlene.
Now, how do you want me to pose?

Strictly legit or ranky tanky.

Oh, I leave all the picture
taking to my assistant over there.

- I can show you how to look good though.
- Oh, you're awfully nice, but most men are.

- Get up on the table.
- All right.

Cross you legs.

Now turn a little more, so we can get a
little more of the. Yeah, that's nice.

- Ryan.
- Eh?

- Be back in a minute.
- All right.

I thought you understood this is no time
for personal projects. Now, stand by.

What are you
beefing about? I just lined up...

the snappiest fruit
basket in the show for a picture.

Oh, I suppose that took effort.

All I know is what men like to see in
a picture. Why don't you take a look?

What is she? An old friend as of today?

Come on, be a good guy, give the kid a break.

- No.
- Why not?

- We're interested only in certain types.
- Oh, afraid, eh?

Afraid I might bag a homer with
your boyfriend here, I'm wise Sister.

- My boyfriend?
- Looks like her round.

Well, far be it from me
to hide a light from a bushel.

If that's what the great American
public wants, we'll give it to them.

- All right smile Miss...
- Darlene.

- Now, try to look intelligent.
- Eh?

- Thank you.
- Hey, my face was open.

- I wasn't ready.
- Oh, you looked great honey.

With your picture on the cover
we'll sell two million magazines.

See you later.

One at a time girls, we'll get around
to all of you. Take my word for it.

Ryan, you're an absolute genius.

Not only do those girls think you're my boss
but they also believe you own the magazine.

Can I help it if I look like an executive?

And that Darlene.

Where on earth could she
find a name like that?

- Sounds like a substitute for butter.
- She's a swell kid.

I'm well aware of your opinion
but I don't have to share it, do I?

- She can do 5 shows a day, can you do that?
- Those simple little dance steps?

I've seen children dance
better than that on their hands.

And if I bleached my hair I...

could look just as cheap and
tough as Darlene and six friends.

Maybe you could at
that, you better watch yourself.

You know, you're not a bad egg.

Nothing razzle-dazzle, but you could be
a lot of woman if you ever got the urge.

- You're talking to your employer Ryan.

I like it, you got brains, ability, good
looks. Everything a man admires in a woman.

Well, thanks.

- Say, are we working tonight?
- No.

What are you doing?

Nothing.

Then would you be as sweet as
you look and lend me your car?

- What?
- Thanks, you're a pal.

- I, I maneuvered a date with Darlene.
- Oh, that's fine.

In these times,
with my tires, you're going joy riding.

Oh, no, you got
me wrong, all I want to do is...

park it out in front
of her apartment for a flash.

After all I'm supposed to be a big shot.

You know, this is wonderful.
Positively wonderful, exactly as I'd hoped.

- What's wonderful?
- You're proving my point, you ape.

Look at her, brazen,
bleached, not a brain in her head.

- What did she do to you?
- Nothing.

Only wouldn't you know
she'd be just the type for Ryan?

They were attracted to each
other like syrup to a pancake.

Can't be this light that's turning you green.
I told you you can't fight fire by eating it.

I'm doing all right...

one more day like this and I'll be so...

fed up with the man, it'll be
an effort to listen to his name.

- I don't think.
- Who's here besides Roger?

- Henry.
- Oh, what does he want?

Don't ask me, he's your boyfriend.

- Hello.
- Oh hello dear.

I had hopes that you
might be lonely this evening.

Lonely? With 200 pounds
of manhood on her payroll?

- Who told you that?
- Wasn't I supposed to tell?

Tell what?

She hired that big sandhog as an assistant
in a crazy attempt to get fed up with him.

- Silliest idea I ever heard of.
- I don't think it's silly.

- I ate a whole jar of honey once.
- What?

Period.

You hired that ditch digger
who was here the other night?

- Is there a law against it?
- Well, what is he know about photography?

- Nothing.
- Have you lost your mind Kate?

Are you letting yourself be
completely swayed by emotionalism.

Oh no, exactly the
opposite, I was attracted to the man.

Now I'm deliberately proving
how ridiculous that attraction is.

- But you were attracted.
- Isn't that what she said?

Katherine, I insist that you end
this association immediately.

Go ahead and insist. Meanwhile, I'll continue
settling my own problems in my own way.

- Katherine Grant speaking.
- Hi, is Ryan.

Say, how that picture of Darlene come out?

Where are you?

It did, eh? That's great.

Ryan, you better tell that girl immediately
that her picture will not be used.

On the cover, eh?
Hey, that's a break, isn't it?

Yeah, she'll be glad to hear it.

- Won't you honey?
- Oh gee, yeah.

Listen to me, I don't care what you do...

but I demand the return of my car
right now, you understand? Right...

right know.

Oh, sure, I'll explain it takes a couple
of weeks before publication, yeah.

- Well, don't work too hard kid, good night.
- Oh gee, you're wonderful.

Just keep that in mind.

Oh, good morning.

Nice to see you too.

- This should be very interesting.
- Oh, you mean about the car?

Well, it was so late last night when
I finished, I figured it'd be better...

- Finished what?
- Are you kidding?

Well, I'm not surprised to
learn why you're in need of money.

But if you think I'm going to let you use
your job with me as a persuasive influence...

- on the blondenes of Broadway...
- You mean I'm a bad boy?

- You're positively disgusting.
- Fair enough.

- Oh, you owe me one day's pay.
- Are you quitting?

- Oh, wasn't I just fired?
- No, you...

- You were being reprimanded.
- Oh well, let's get to work.

Say, you know, I was thinking those girls
at the theater yesterday were Ok...

but I know a spot that's got some that are
really choice, want me to show you today?

- No, we're working right here.
- Oh, any good?

- Special assignment, the Body Beautiful.
- Oh, where is she?

- Who?
- The, what you said.

All ready.

- All right?
- Oh yes, this way Mr. Brice.

Will you stand by the pedestal please?

Oh Ryan, at the Annual Convention
of Physical Culture Directors...

Mr. Brice was voted to have the
most beautiful body in America.

- Glad to know you.
- It's a pleasure Ryan.

- Who was the idea of that?
- Sorry, guess I don't know my own strength.

- Mr. Brice, if you...
- Catching a guy off guard, eh?

- I said I was sorry.
- Come on, introduce us again.

Come on, shake hands
fair and square, I dare you.

Say, what's going on there? Stop that, here.

I happen to be paying your salary Ryan, you
can play games on your own time, get down.

Wise guy.

Tip that light down a little, will you?
The one near his right shoulder.

Sorry pal.

- What happened?
- He poked me.

I did not, I was fixing
the light, my elbow slipped.

Ryan, I'll thank you
to concentrate on your duties.

Adjust the light above him, I want
to accentuate those chest muscles.

Chest muscles?

Now, take your position please Mr. Brice.
Yes, give me a little more of...

That's enough.

Now tip the light
a little more this way. More.

There, that's it. Now tighten it there.

I dodi.

Ryan...

- I guess I tightened too loose.
- Oh, are you hurt?

- What do you trying to do? Kill me?
- Not by hitting you on the head.

No, no, no, here, here, stop it. Stop, stop.

Go on, let him go.
I'll toss him out the window.

Stop it Mr. Brice, there's work to
be done. Now, now, now let's do it.

- Ryan, clear this mess out of the way.
- Just told me not to touch him.

You know what I'm talking about, now do it.
You, you take your position, goodness.

All right Mr. Brice, now let's see.

Now turn around, let's see the back.

Fine, that should be good.

Get it up Ryan.

Ryan, never mind,
I'll take care of that, get back.

Will you turn around?

Little higher.

There, that's all right.
That's fine. Leave it alone.

All right Mr. Brice, hold it.

It's a still picture Mr. Brice,
stop rippling those muscles.

All right, Ok, now I
take one more for protection.

After this, we'll take one
with the barbell, get it for him Ryan.

There, that's fine.

- Give him the barbell Ryan.
- Sure.

Here you are pal.

Ryan, have you gone mad?

- Oh Mr. Brice.
- Ryan?

He's a strong man, isn't he? I can
throw it, he ought to be able to catch it.

Get me up, I'll kill him.

Get out you, get out of here.
You better go take a walk or something.

- You mean so he won't kill me?
- Oh get out. No, come here and help him.

No, why should I help somebody I don't like?

So long Atlas.

Oh cello Mr. Brice, resting?

Oh, that's probably Henry, will you
tell him I'll be with him in a minute?

Yeah.

- Oh hello Roger.
- Hello Hoppy.

Come on in.

- It's Roger.
- Why?

Why not? Food and drink here are free.

Hello Kate, ready?

I'm sorry Roger,
I'm dining with Henry this evening.

No need to be sorry Henry has to work.

I'm entertaining you tonight at his expense.

Well, of all the...

Why didn't he phone?

There might've been something
else I'd rather do, you know.

- That's what he's afraid of.
- Go on out with him Katie.

Any man as understanding as Roger
deserves the best food Henry can buy.

Might as well.

Say, eat a good square meal, will you Roger?
Stop raiding our ice box.

- I brought this myself, a nickel.
- Oh, spendthrift.

Where's your sandhog?

Probably in his
cage for the night, bye Hoppy.

- Goodbye kids, have fun.
- Goodbye Hoppy.

How is the campaign coming?
Has he nauseated you yet?

Well, confidentially, I'm not making much
headway, whatever he does, he does well.

- Maybe you never had him out of his element.
- As a matter of fact, I haven't...

except by imagination.

Well, imagination is all
right for people with no teeth...

but you're young enough to face things.

You want to prove
he's a lout, eh? Well, do it.

Take him to a literary tea at Cond?'s
or the open forum at Carnegie.

Places where he'd stand out
like a starched penguin.

Wouldn't that be a touch on the nasty side?

Oh, I wouldn't wish
the treatment on a neighbor's cat but...

if you honestly
want to get fed up with the man...

As long as I have time
on my hands this evening.

What you going to do?

Oh, excuse me.

- May I ask?
- You may.

We're being honored at dinner, I hope, by the
presence of James Ryan, Esquire, Local 908.

Kate, you're not going to...

You look very nice dear.

I love this place.

You could be thrown into a panic
by a waiter with squeaky shoes.

This way sir.

Roger, wake up he's coming.

Oh Katie.

- Well, look at you.
- Oh hello Ryan, you remember Roger.

- Oh, the little piano player, how are you?
- How are you?

This is quite a joint, I got a rich
uncle who was buried in one of these.

Ryan, I'm sorry our
assignment has fallen through but...

the people we were to photograph
have canceled their reservation.

I don't blame them,
why don't we get out of here?

- Oh Ryan Miss Grant and I are celebrating.
- Celebrating what?

Well, Tchaikovsky and I have just composed
a number which looks like being a hit.

Perhaps, you'd join us for dinner, would you?

Yeah, if this is your idea of
celebrating, I'll game.

Oh, good.

- Say, Tchaikovsky is dead, isn't he?
- That's right.

How do you feel?

- What's soupe Du jour?
- Potage a la De Comp.

- I'll have it, you have it too.
- No, I'll have it too.

What's this here?

Ah monsieur, that is corned beef and cabbage.

Why don't they
put it down? I'll have some of it.

- Three bucks for corned beef and cabbage?
- Ryan, not so loud.

I'll bet you couldn't lift three bucks
worth of corned beef and cabbage.

- Monsieur is complaining?
- The name isn't Monsieur, is Ryan.

This is Miss Grant, that's
Mr. Roger, get off your horse.

- Glad to know you, my name is O'Conner.
- How are you?

Patrick Aloysius.

Now look pal, we got roped in
here on a bum steer, what's the word?

Confidentially, the
corned beef and cabbage stinks.

- What's good then?
- Nothing, nothing in the joint is good.

Now, don't be letting
on that I wised you up but...

did you ever hear of a place
by the name of Murphy's?

Did I ever hear
of Murphy's? Hey, that's an idea.

Come on, let's get out of here.
I'll show you how to eat.

Thanks O'Conner.

Tell Murphy that I ain't
been able to be around lately...

on the account of me old lady is
using me for Red Cross bandages.

- Sure, I'll do it.
- You owe for two drinks bud.

Adios Butch.

- Now you talking.
- Here you are pal.

- Thanks.
- So long.

Here you are.

- Drinks?
- Coffee.

- Coffee.
- Milk.

Not bad for four bits, eh?

I know men with ulcers
who give 10 dollars for a whiff.

And whatever else Murphy is,
he's certainly generous.

Come on eat up, you've
needed something like this for years.

Just how do you mean that?

Don't get touchy, I mean you
need a little ketchup in your life.

What a thought.

Ketchup.

- Well, blow my torch if it ain't Superman.
- How are you Noisy?

- You remember Clancy Miss Grant.
- Oh Lady Bad Luck, glad to see you.

Hiya Clancy, the name is Kate.
How's things in the cave?

- The name is Roger, glad to know you pal.
- Who you hitting?

Thought it was the custom.

The tunnel ain't been the same
without you, not a good fight in two days.

What's happened to Morrisey?
He challenge a dead duck.

He's in the back room
with the mob, spoiling for a brawl.

- Come on, bring your friend.
- We just came in here for a bite.

The lady means she's a lady.

The lady means she didn't want
Ryan to lose his beautiful teeth.

- Lead on, Clancy.
- Now there's a woman with a head of her own.

- She get like this often?
- Only when annoyed by men named Ryan.

- Hey, look what I found.
- Hello.

Hey, what's the idea?
You know the rules, no dames.

Morrisey, your mouth is too loud.

You know, all I've heard
from sandhogs are rules against women.

It would be interesting
to learn how a sandhog is born.

That's telling them Miss Kate, grab a chair.

Oh, don't be so formal, call me Toots.

- Hiya slaves.
- Oh Superman.

The old windbag himself.

Oh, this is Roger,
he's a friend of Miss Grant's.

I guess you remember her from the tunnel.

I'd give a buck
and a half if I could forget her.

She cost you your job,
what you hanging around her for?

- Or am I being too commercial?
- I could poke you in the nose for an answer.

- When you grow up you could.
- And there's plenty of room to fight here.

Now, you stay out of this Peter
or I'll join in and choose you.

- You try a punch and I'll be in it.
- Me too.

- Which side?
- Either side.

Waiter, could I have a check?

Well, somebody hit
somebody so we can get going.

Now wait a minute...

Let him alone, I want to see if I can send
him through the door without opening it.

Oh, now listen to me, all of you.
You're acting like a bunch of children.

What good is fighting if you
don't know what you're fighting for?

- We're going to see who's head man.
- Oh, I've no illusions.

The head man doesn't
get there by brute strength.

He, he uses a combination
of qualities, brains, agility.

- Hey, that sounds like dirty fighting to me.

- Shut up.
- Listen.

Tell them what you mean,
so I can understand it better.

Well, I mean, here you are, ready
to beat each other's brains out over a...

simple argument that
could be settled without a blow.

- Like how?
- Like how...

- Roger, get over to the piano.
- Oh, piano.

Now, the rest of you,
move this table out of the way.

Come on, well come on.

- Come on, you heard what the lady said.
- Put it over there, will you?

That Ryan sure picks some pips,
now look what he brings.

I remember as a girl we used this method
to decide who was our natural leader.

- What are you getting at?
- Musical chairs.

Musical chairs with these kiddies?

Well why not? They want to find out who's the
boss, why should everybody bleed to death?

Now let's see, one, two, three,
four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

Now I want eight chairs.
One, two, three, four, five, six.

Now two more, you see?
There's one less chair than there are men.

Now you form a circle around
here, come on, right over here.

And you keep marching so long as the music
plays. The minute it stops, you sit down.

The one who's left
without a chair is out, see?

I remember this, this is a game for babies.

- Oh, what else you think you are?
- Babies.

Oh no, come on boys. Oh please.
Now if you'll give me half a chance...

I'll prove to you the superiority
of mind over a broken jaw.

Yeah, let Toots show us how
it works, bring back the chairs.

Thank you Clancy, now put
that down Roger and play, go on.

Now, all right, march.

Now remember, grab
a chair when the music stops.

Oh, no, no, don't fight boys, just sit down.

No, not here, wait, stop it.

Oh, my goodness, no, stop.
Here, here, get over it.

- No, stop it.
- Who hit me?

No, no Clancy, Clancy, you're eliminated.

- Now where are the chairs?
- Here.

- Here's mine.
- All right, put them down.

Put them down, just like they were.

That right, that's fine now, here.

All right? Now we're ready again.

Roger.

No boys, don't fight.
Use your heads, use your heads.

All right, you're eliminated.

Oh no boys, you haven't got
the idea at all. Now play it right.

No, no, no, stop it, stop it.

All right.

He horned in after
I sat down, that ain't fair.

What are you talking about? I sit while
you're trying to make up your big, fat mind.

No, no, no. Morrisey,
I'm sorry Pete was here first.

- Yeah? I'm staying where I'm sitting.
- Oh, you are? Boys.

Oh, making your own rules, eh?

Let go of me now, you goofs.
Let go of me, you goofs.

You're right, this
is a lot better than fighting.

Well.

I could've dropped you off at
your place the same as Roger.

After all, the champ deserves the best.

It'll be simpler to take the subway.

- Good night.
- Ryan...

Yeah?

- You don't think much of me, do you?
- What difference is make?

- I'd like to know why.
- Didn't say I don't like you.

Look pretty good tonight with your hair
down, could've had any sandhog in the place.

Except you.

You want me?

- Why should I?
- Then quit playing.

I'll see you tomorrow.

You see what your trouble is?
Your head is full of hash.

You could say Ryan, I'm nuts about you,
might find out I feel the same way about you.

Instead of that you play Chinese checkers.

What on earth gave you
the idea that I'm nuts about you?

- Are you or aren't you?
- Of course not.

Then what do you want from me?
Why can't I catch the subway?

- Go ahead and catch it.
- Would you mind if I quit my job?

If you want to.

But you mind telling me why?

Because the longer I'm
around you, the goofier I get.

I'm a grown man, I've taken
care of myself ever since I was a kid.

By my standards, I'm as
good as anybody on earth.

And then you come along
and I start asking myself questions.

Like maybe one person
is better than another...

and there couldn't be any real
happiness, just momentary infatuation.

Yeah, yeah, how you know?

Because I'm nuts about you, Ryan.

Well, I'm not nuts.
Katherine Grant, are you drunk?

Where are your manners?
Can't you see she's busy?

- Katherine...
- I'll see you inside Hoppy.

Ryan, if my own sister hasn't the
willpower to do as she intended, I'll do it.

If you want to avoid a kick in the pants
you'd better clear out of here and stay out.

- What's she talking about?
- I haven't the faintest idea.

Have you lost your head completely?

Do you deny that
ever since you met the man...

you've been deliberately
plotting to make a fool of him?

- Tell me that wasn't your plan.
- Yeah, go ahead, tell her.

He's got me all mixed up,
you see, that was my intention but I...

Why do you lie to involve yourself?

You know you've been making
a game of ridiculing him.

Pretending to be attracted so you'd be
fed up with him as quickly as possible.

- You've even told that to Henry.
- To Henry, eh?

Hoppy, would you
please go inside, I want to talk to Ryan.

No need.

I know what you'd say, that maybe you
weren't on the level before, but you are now.

That wouldn't be right.

In the morning, you'd wake
up cold blooded with that..

Same old routine about maybe
one person is better than another.

I guessed right the first time kid.

You're a phony from heel to heel, sleep well.

It's pretty serious proposition.

If they have to call off the project
for good, the city will lose millions.

So you want me to go down and
photograph a hole that's filled up?

No, not exactly.

You see, there's a man who
says he can save the tunnel...

and they're giving him
a chance to prove it today.

- How is he going to do it?
- Now that I don't know.

I realize this is a spot news
assignment a bit off your block...

but it's darned important and
after all, you're familiar with the work.

Ok, but the idea of one man
saving an entire tunnel project...

sounds like Aunt Minnie's
pipe dream, what's his name?

Ryan, James Ryan.

- Ryan?
- You know him?

Not as well as I thought.

The facts are these...

this tunnel project has been condemned
because of cave-ins, escaping pressure...

that make it impossible for the men to
continue working with any degree of safety.

A few years ago
Ryan went to work as a sandhog...

to familiarize himself with the
problems of underwater construction.

During this time he's developed a machine...

which he claims will
permit resumption of work.

That we don't know.

But if what he claims is true then Ryan
will have accomplished something is...

been attempted for years without success.

Can't we go in for pictures?

Sorry, but we're not risking any
more lives than is absolutely necessary.

There will be only officials and
the volunteer sandhog group.

Here's your chance to speak to Ryan
now and photograph his machine.

Couldn't you have hired
a small boy to carry all this junk?

What's he saying?

He still having trouble
getting the pressure up.

The air is blowing right into the river.

Ryan, these people want to ask some
questions and take a few pictures.

Oh, the press, eh?

- I used being a racket myself.
- What about the machine?

Well...

the idea for this machine came
to me while I was watching the...

Sideshow barker at Coney Island.

This barker put a chemical powder
into a glass of water and froze it.

Of course, the trick was
supposed to have been magic.

It took me a couple of months
at engineering school to find out...

that it was simply a well known
endothermic chemical reaction.

- How do you spell it?
- I don't.

So here we are.

The chemical in this feed box here is forced
through these pipes and into the drills here.

Goes from the drills into the muck.

Freezing any portion of the tunnel end
to prevent cave-ins and pressure escapes.

- Mind looking this way?
- Any questions?

We'll fire the questions if it works.

All set Ryan, the pressure
is as steady as she'll ever be.

- Ok. Hey, Clancy...
- Follow me please.

Right with you as
soon as we finish this hand.

- Now you knucklehead.
- Coming Superman.

Sorry, they won't let you
photograph the machine in action.

He's sorry about the nicest things.

A publicity break like that
would be a great help right now.

- Good luck.
- Hope I don't need it.

Hey Ryan, am I in
charge of your water remover?

- Give me those flashbulbs.
- Oh, what goes on?

Didn't I tell you to take
it in through the machine lock?

Yeah, so you did.

Keep your mouth shut, I'm going to
photograph that machine in action.

But Kate...

Didn't I tell you
I'd meet you inside in the high air?

- Yeah.
- So what the devil you want to know?

What you waiting for, you brainless baboons?

- Hello kid, where's your girlfriend?
- Ah, she...

Oh, I forgot, you ain't very bright.

Oh, come on you lugs, we can't
keep that air high till doomsday.

What's your hurry? We're working
for nothing, my high and mighty.

And it is doomsday.

Oh, pardon me dearie,
I forgot you were a bundle of nerves.

Gentlemen...

You can see from up here.

Then you'll be able to get back in
the tank in a hurry if anything happens.

- I'll be down with the crew.
- Here's hoping.

I'm not worried.

All right in there?

Not enough pressure to begin to hold back
that pump when they loosen the boards.

It's as high as we can get it.

Ryan knows what he's up against
and he still claims he can do it.

The trouble with me is I keep
volunteering for things without thinking.

Some morning I'm going to
wake up in the maternity ward.

- You expect a ride in the tunnel of love?
- Bring it down easy.

Keep it coming, come on easy.

All right, hold it there, Morrisey,
get a power hookup for the machine.

Right.

I see eight spots ready to give and
bury us in muck in two seconds flat.

I see six spots where we
can get sucked into the river bed.

Those spots you seeing from bad booze.

Come on, give me a hand, get the cover off.

All set? Give her the juice.

- Throw it out there, you guys.
- Untangle that line.

- You all set?
- All right.

Now there can't be any mistakes in this
because your first one will be your last.

When you yank that
boarding loose, yank it all the way.

Get clear or we'll be
shoving these drills through your backs.

Got to freeze that muck before
it can bury us, you understand?

Ok, you give us the count.

All right, one, two, three...

Here we go.

Now we're holding.

Wait, what's happening?

- It's working, it's slowing down.
- Why wouldn't it work? This is my baby.

I'll hang on till it's
up me ears but no longer.

- It's a dame.
- It's that bad-luck dame.

Get her out of here.

No, I'm all right, get back to your drill.

I got to get you out of
here and see you're safe.

No please.

All right you guys, hurry up,
it's gaining on you, get in there.

Mike, get ready to grab that track.

- Here they come boys.
- We'll get the lowdown now.

- Everything all right?
- What happened? Did it work or didn't it?

It didn't.

We had a little tough luck.

- Everyone accounted for?
- Yeah.

Well gentlemen, officially the
test must be classed as a failure.

If you have anything
to add to that, go ahead.

I guess not.

Except that the cave-ins
can't be controlled with one machine.

- We had six...
- Well, thanks for trying.

- Thanks.
- Thank you boys.

You fellas tried hard.
I want you to know I appreciate it.

I'll see you above
when this mob clears out of here.

Where's Kate?

What happened to you?
You look like a mud pie.

Ryan...

Why don't you get out of here?

I had to ask you if there's
anything in the world I can do...

- make up for the trouble I caused.
- No, anything else?

I wish things had turned
out differently because...

I admire you so much,
and I believe in your ability and...

I was pulling for you with all my heart.

Look...

the farther you step out of your stall to
square things, the more smells like charity.

You don't owe me anything.
And if you did, I wouldn't collect.

That's clear, ain't it?

What's he pouting about?

- Oh, shut up.
- Yeah, shut up.

Oh, I see.

- Clancy, we've got to help him.
- I was trying to figure what do you mean we?

You and Roger and I, there's
something lost in there that...

might mean all the difference
in the world to Ryan's chances.

Lady, anything that's lost
in there is going to stay lost.

- I got to get that camera.
- Have you gone daffy?

You mean that the
three of us should traipse...

right back in there where
it took 10 men to get you out?

But they were caught in the
mud, we can go along the wall.

Wait a minute.

Apart from being afraid of the dark, I
hate tunnels, even after they're finished.

Clancy, those officials weren't close enough
to see that his machine is having any effect.

If we can get the
camera and the film isn't ruined...

the pictures will show that the
machine was actually stopping the muck.

Why do you say it that way
so I feel like I ain't doing all I can?

You've answered your
own question, let's get out of here.

Shut up.

It might be that the muck has plugged those
leaks so that the pressure is built up again.

- We could take a look.
- Oh, Clancy, you're a darling.

But that ain't saying
we're going all the way in.

Blow your nose like this.

End of the line.

I wish I knew what it was like up there now.

If it's like I think it is,
I got no business down here.

Well, the air pressure
seems to be holding it back.

- Come on, let's try it.
- Should I roll up my trousers?

I'm all right.

Over there is where I lost the camera.

Here?

Now, let's see I,
I was standing facing the tunnel and...

When it broke, I...

I must've thrown it that way.

You didn't stand there, you were under there.

What am I supposed to do?
There's not even a piano.

Feel for the camera
Roger, it's bound to be here.

All right, I got a grip.

- Muck.
- Roger.

There's the first reason why we
should've stood out in the tunnel.

Roger, what on earth were you doing?

I don't remember.

- Roger...
- Look...

Come on.

This was taken right
after they applied the drill.

You remember my flash
light bulb going off at the time.

And this was taken a minute later.

Now you can see that the machine has
cut the flow of muck to less than half.

If Ryan and the men hadn't
stopped to rescue me, I'm...

certain they would've completed
the experiment successfully.

Look, you can see here...

that the cave-in which buried the
machine is developing at a different point.

You say this picture
was taken first and this second?

- Yes.
- How do we know they're not reversed?

Well, among other things, by the
relative amount of mud on the men.

How could they be cleaner on a later picture?

It's a fact sir, that the darn thing
was on the level doing its stuff.

Apparently it was, to bad we
couldn't see more clearly at the time.

But now that you have proof,
don't you think it worthwhile to

finance Ryan in construction of enough of
these machines to save the tunnel?

Well, that would take some discussion.

Of course, we thank you
for this very encouraging evidence.

Thank you, if you do give him another
chance, I must insist on one thing.

Yes?

Don't tell him why you're doing it, other
than that you think he deserves another try.

- I mean, don't mention these pictures.
- Is there any particular reason?

Well, I prefer that he didn't
feel indebted to me in any way.

Well, I'm willing to oblige you
but I must say I don't understand.

Very few men do understand,
each other, I mean.

- Goodbye.
- Goodbye.

Katherine Grant,
prominent magazine photographer...

today announced her engagement to
Henry Fulton, publisher of Mirror Magazine.

Date of the wedding is indefinite, but
the engagement is to be celebrated tonight...

by a group of intimate
friends of the bride to be.

Well, that's the most sensible
news this paper has printed in years.

So he finally did it.

Oh, why waste words on him?

He put me in my place and it's
a darn good place if you ask me.

Well, I agree, don't I?

Romantic marriage
went out with smelling salts.

Today it's a common sense institution.

If you don't have intelligence
enough to better your position...

then you deserve
to fall in love and starve to death.

Ok, Ok.

Quit poking your
chin out at me, I'm on your side.

- What do you want from me?
- An argument, you dope.

Oh, Kate.

Oh, sorry.

- Mr. James Ryan?
- Who wants to see him?

Roger Winant.

- Come in here.
- Oh, thank you.

Sit down.

According to the river bottom samples...

we won't have any more
trouble till we reach this point.

Start doubling your bracings
50 feet before you get to it.

Be sure that Clancy and his
special crew is standing by.

Right.

- There's a Mr. Roger to see you.
- Roger?

Oh, send him in.

- And Miss...
- Maggis.

Is getting a little impatient.

Tell her I'll be out in a couple of minutes.

Ok.

You can go in and you wait here.

Hello Ryan.

Quite a busy place
you got if you don't mind mud.

- Dust off a chair for yourself.
- Oh, thanks pal.

Listen, big shot...

Oh, Darlene, this is Roger Winant.
He's friend of Miss Grant's.

I'm very happy.

Listen, if you invite a lady
for dinner, you take her to dinner.

I've been sitting on
that hard bench so long my...

How soon will you be ready?

I'll be out pretty soon, if Roger doesn't
have anything important on his mind.

I wouldn't bothered you except
that my carrier pigeon was sick.

Ok, panty waist. Wrap it up, will you?

Yes ma'am.

What brought you out in fresh air?

- Have you read this morning's paper?
- Haven't had time.

There's a picture of you on the
front page, almost recognizable.

- Never mind me, what brought you here?
- Don't rush me, I'm being diplomatic.

There's also an announcement
of Kate's engagement to Henry...

right alongside the obituaries.

Congratulate her for me, he's nice fellow.

Are we talking about the same Henry?

Look Roger, you're a sweet little
guy but what brought you here?

I think Kate should be
marrying you instead of Henry.

- What is she think?
- She knows it.

I see?

- What she say?
- Nothing.

But I know for a fact that, from the first,
Kate fell for you like a ton of oats...

and in trying to prove you were no
good for her, she proved just the opposite.

Then why is she marrying Henry?

You ask that with your toes bruised
from the kicks you've planted on her?

And if you ever feel like taking any
bows for what you're doing here...

it might interest you to know that Kate is
responsible for the second chance you got.

- No?
- Yes.

We went back into the tunnel with Clancy.

I fell down and came up
loaded with Kate's camera.

Then she presented photographic proof to
the officials that your machine would work.

Why can't that
woman let me alone? I got pride.

Just once in his life, a guy likes to feel
that he's getting somewhere on his own.

What are you trying to
tell me? That I'm a stooge?

Personally Ryan, I think you're a goof.

Hoppy, you show all the
brilliance of an Italian general.

Sophie, will you be kind enough to
keep your eyes in their own sockets?

Play your hand as you see fit, my dear.
I'm simply outmaneuvering her.

- You getting a little bald Henry.
- Please dear.

They have to make so much
noise in there? We can't concentrate.

May I ask if you've
picked up the nine of clubs?

You may, but I won't tell you.

When you pick up a card Hoppy,
you're supposed to lay one down.

I know rules are aggravating
dear, but so is the way you play.

You put things so nicely Henry.
All the charm of an eight year old brat.

- Hello.
- Yeah.

Well?

If you would be so kind
as to remove your bodyguard.

I and you could
settle this thing, man to man.

All right Hilda. Settle what?

Oh, you know what I'm
talking about, a guy named Ryan.

Nothing remains to be settled about
Ryan and it's obvious you don't realize...

you've intruded into my engagement party.

Now don't give me
that ersatz, this strictly a front.

You're still just bursting
your stays trying to get my man.

- Your man?
- Yeah, my man.

Oh, now lookie here,
fluffy face, don't get me mad.

Because if I get mad,
I'm liable to throw you a dirty look...

and where I look dirty no grass grows, ever.

It so happens that I'm not
after Ryan and he's not after me.

Ok, Ok, Ok, so he not
after you but he ain't forgot you.

So I'm just warning you
to keep your chassis out of the way.

Now is that enlightenment clear enough?
Or do I got to make it clearer?

Apparently Ryan didn't teach you anything.

- You punched me.
- So she did, right on the button.

- You think I wasn't going to show up?
- See what I mean?

Katherine, this is positively fantastic.

Did you have the audacity
to invite this man here tonight?

No, that was somebody else idea.

- Hey, put me down.
- No Ryan, put him down.

Ryan, put him down. No, look...

They locked the door.

- Ryan, just what you think you're doing?
- You had it fixed, eh?

You know, once you said this
chair had more character that I did.

I think you were moving a little fast then.

Ryan, if you don't release
me this instant, I'll call the police.

Go ahead and call.

I think you're moving too fast again, so
I thought we better have a little check up.

Well, figure it this way, the law allows you
to have only one of us and we all want you.

Regardless of what's been said on both sides.

Well, go ahead, make your pick.

Katherine, are you going to
be a party to this nonsense?

You big ape.

That makes you an ape's wife.

Oh no.

Goodbye Henry.

- Oh Ryan, Ryan, here I am.
- Hey, hey, hey, let her go.

No Hop, somebody open the door for him.

- Thanks, pal.
- Drop over for dinner sometime.

- Tomorrow night?
- Oh no, not tomorrow night.