Magic Cop (1990) - full transcript
A former cop rejoins the police department to investigate a drug ring that employs ghosts and vampires.
Hey, Aunt Sam is changing
electric appliances for his son again
Chu is so good to her late father
She wrote that she met a boy
and got a job
I do want a job but uncle objects
With hell money, bribe all ghost officers
This year is TV set and video recorder
next year will be a car and a house
with fridge and washing machine
so you must bless me
Dear dad and mom
this is all for this year
I'll burn you more if I make more money
next year
Uncle Fung
Don't pee onto the burning pot
Go back as your father wants you
Aunt Sam, you set fire on something
Shit, I get clumsy as I'm old
Don't blow
Uncle
It's most unlucky to be put out while
burning
Why?
The Hell Gate is opened only once a year
They all want their family to burn them
something
If they get frustrated
what do you think will happen?
Excuse me
Don't blow, Aunt Sam
Why?
Ghost!
It's Ok...
Lin, get some incense here
Aunt Sam, kneel down
Amida Buddha... I didn't mean it
Amida Buddha
Apologize with earnest
Don't blame me
Ok, Aunt Sam, get up
Aunt, it accepts your apology
Does it?
Lin, help Aunt for a rest
Really Ok?
Yes, go and take a rest
Mind your steps
Don't blame me...
Am I really alright?
Yes, don't worry
Yeah, don't worry, go and take a rest
Ghost!
She didn't mean it
Ghost!You ask for this!
Uncle Fung, help... don't
Lin!
It scared me much
Burn incense for it every second and
sixteenth monthly
Yes.
Why are you laughing?
Uncle, you're like a Taoist priest
more than a cop
Both of them work for people
Beer
Waiter, give me some water
Sure.
Thanks, give me some more chips
Give me another ashtray
Don't fool me much
Officer Lam ordered us to disguise well
so you're waiter while I'm guest
You sly!
Don't chat while working
You must fool me too?
Officer Lam ordered me to
You'll know when we finish
Hey, brother
Call me Officer Lam while working
not brother
Ok, you want me to be waiter
but you're enjoying yourself here!
Can you play the piano?
No
That's it
Hey, no news so far
Is the information correct?
What it we retreat?
Is that girl pretty
Sir, we're waiting for a drug transaction
Let's woo girls after work
We've been in here for 2 hour's
What do you mean?
Don't you think we need a companion?
You're getting horny
I find you very stupid
I see, you mean something bad about her?
Just take a look
She has never moved since she came
and her hand has fixed on the briefcase
you think?
Let's question her
Wait for 10 more seconds
What's the difference?
Wait till the song is over
Head, what news?
Single girl? Easy job!
Miss... it's not good? Miss...
Miss, can I sit here?
Miss, we are cops
I suspect a problem about your case
Open it up
You agree if you don't stay a word?
Officer Lam, something here
Freeze!
Miss, I'm charging you of refusal of arrest
drug trafficking, and assulting officers
Don't run
What's the case?
Whatever it is
Chase
Don't run, stand there...
Hold her...
Miss, don't fool anymore
You bitch!
You have help?
Hands up
No, I can't manage it myself
That car, be quick
Officer Lam
Open the door
Call for reinforcement
Hey man, how to write the report?
But on one will believe it
Is it finished?
Nearly
Let me have a look...
At that moment
a Chinese girl broke the window
I, No.2237, flew in there
and we crashed, quite nice...
Why didn't you type it for me?
But I'm only typing a resignation letter
You'd better become a fiction writer
How dare you fool me?
Don't you find her strange?
A bit
You've been there for 2 hours
Can't you find anything about her?
Yes, she lives in Tung Pin Chau
with a granny 78 years old
Everyone calls her Aunt Sam
What again?
Call her and see the body
Are you very tired?
Can't you just use your mind?
Why must you find fault in me?
She is 70 something years old
and you asks her out from Tung Pin Chau
she will need much rest, right?
If I were your buddy
I would break up with you
Can't we fool about?
There's lice on you hair
You have lice there
you're fooling me!
Let's not play
Call up Tung Pin Chau
and ask our men to check
and send you a report
Thanks!
Uncle
Uncle
it's good to go downtown occasionally
Let's go to Sogo, shall we?
I'll go shopping with you
You needn't make up excuse
We'll see the body with Aunt Sam and
back to headquarters
We needn't go anywhere
Uncle!
What did you promise me?
Ask for uncle's permission
if I must go out
I can only see movies with uncle
I mustn't chat with boys
unless I desert uncle
Unless you're with uncle!
Are you alone?
With my uncle
It's good
Your father's dead?
And your mother?
It's a pity
Don't panic
you can get married a second time
Mind you words!
Sorry... is it dirty?
Uncle, you hit him wrongly
He's cleaning it for me
Uncle... sorry it's a misunderstanding...
Who's seeing body of Chan Chu Chu?
I!
Be quick, it's off duty time
Senior, I'm Sergeant 2273
I come to pick you up
Senior, this way please
Uncle, what about...
Where was she shot?
On her leg
It's strange!
Why, there's always a hole if shot
by bullet
But it will always be swollen!
Yeah, why?
Unless she was dead before she got shot!
But she was energetic before she got shot
and dragged me a long way
A dead body will still move
How come a dead body moves?
That's reaction of the joints
There're many way to make a dead body
move
Senior, you're smart
How did she get injured in the head?
No idea, I didn't hit on her head
Where's the autopsy report?
At the police station
Let's read it right away
Sure
Senior, this
Pang, how about the gambling money?
Owe you for the time being
Senior, this way
Chi, two tee
Sure
Is tea OK?
Hot water will do
One hot water, one tea
Yes!
Officer Lam is not yet back, let's wait
The report is nearly done
Head, why is that old bad here?
What old bag? He's Uncle Fung
Senior of Tung Pin Chau
He was a cop before you were born, nut!
I'll go and find Officer Lam
Serve him well
Uncle Fung, water
Thanks
What's going on?
怎么回事?
What? The computer is broken again?
There's no response!
Officer Lam
that computer broke down again
That nut must have kicked off the plug
why are you beautifully dressed?
To go out with you
You mean it?
Sure, he's our man from Tung Pin Chau
He wants to see you
Hi, Uncle, come in
Officer Lam, the report is ready
Good girl, so short time?
I'll get you some candies next time
Sorry, Uncle
Why this?
Hey, where've you been
I've been looking for you
This is Uncle Fung
our senior from Tung Pin Chau
We've met already
You've met? Uncle Fung is smart
just then at the mortuary
a dead body jumped up as he touched it
It scared me much
We're cops but you act like a story-teller
We ask for science
Senior, sit down
You might chat
while I go on with my work
Right, Uncle, this time you come
is about statement of Aunt Sam, right?
That's it
Uncle
I'm sure you've been taught in academy
the way for a brief statement is...
neat, straight, quick
simple, comprehensible, accordingly
I think you can begin
No idea
Uncle, what no idea?
Your or she?
You must have been taught in academy
for a calm analysis about statement
Think it over
Uncle, we all want to solve the case early
Are you fooling us as you said so?
What is it?
Man, if it weren't a strange case
I wouldn't have come
Ok... if what you're going to say
is helpful to the case
I do want to listen
Didn't you want to read
the autopsy report?
Right, I suspect it was dead
before it got shot
You mean I met a ghost?
No, but it was already dead
Uncle, how can a dead body be
drug trafficker?
No, just then at the mortuary...
Shut up!
Uncle, it's now a modern world
and you're so superstitious?
You're superficial!
Uncle
should we offer her a service?
She's not a ghost
You, Ok... she's not a ghost
but she is already dead
tell me what she is then!
She's a dead body
Is she a vampire?
There are many kinds of dead bodies
Dead body long ago will become vampire
If it doesn't stiffen, it's a moving body
I suspect someone's making use of
moving body for drug trafficking
Attention!
Fung Zee!
Whenever I hear about myths
I know it's you
You haven't changed all these years
Why do you keep standing here
like a post?
No, sir, we're discussing about a case
Uncle Fung mentions about someone may
be drug trafficking with moving bodies
Shit, you're a policeman
how can you say such lousy things?
I'll leave now
Want to listen to the case?
Come to my office for a reunion
Officer Lam, come too
Yes Sir
This is for you, sign it
Still hard job
If you hadn't had so much principles then
you would be sitting here now
But principles are principles
Ok, I'll leave it here
Just sign it whenever you like
Let's not beat the bush
Officer Lam
Yes, yes sir
This is classified as confidential now
You're not to mention to anyone except
your men
Yes Sir!
The autopsy report is back
After studying
she died 7 days before the case
No, is the doctor nut?
I do find it strange
Zee, this is just your case
what do you think?
Officer Ma, you believe him?
Sure! When we were partners
he was famous of solving cases quickly
and he solved many strange cases
You needn't flatter me
Officer Lam, just cancel this case
Burn the body!
Yes Sir!
You mustn't burn the body
Hold!
But people will suspect if we keep
the body!
Burn it
We'll have no clues if we bury it
Reasonable, go ahead
You needn't play tricks
I'll do whatever is deserved
Terrific!
But you mustn't hid anything from me
You must report whatever it is
No problem
this is for the sake of everybody
Officer Lam!
Yes Sir
From now on
you'll investigate with Uncle Fung
What di you say?
And to save the moving around
of Uncle Fung
he will move and live with you
You mean it?
It's fixed
Hello, Office Ma, I...
This is an order, go out
Yes Sir!
Right, Officer Ma
you said he soved cases quickly
but why didn't he get promotion
after so many years?
Right, he was quick at solving cases
but I forgot to say one thing
he made mistakes faster
his nick name is Swivel
and made everywhere a mess
You must lay an eye on him
Why do you let him investigate then?
Only he can solve such a case
Ok, goodbye, sir!
Uncle, see if this dress is nice
I'll find you later
Uncle Fung
Is it delicious?
Take one piece
Help yourself
I'll treat
He's newcomer
Uncle, are you fooling me?
We both have no...
She's Uncle's niece, got it?
Yes
What did Officer Ma say?
Officer Ma asked him to help us
investigate
and he is to live with me
Did you promise him?
Of course I am not willing to
But now...
!
Hello!
I have no girl friend, don't fight with me
It depends then
Why? No need for a key?
This is the key
New technology!
Don't get in the way
Come in, make yourself at home
It's very nice
Please close the door, thanks
this is totally abnormal
Uncle, if it's not the place your like
you can do without it
Uncle, the fist are great
Find the pretties one
Excuse me... please
Good!
What are you doing?
Palm reading is more interesting
Palm reading?
Take it for me
That bath tub is funny
Welcome for a try
Sure
Are you dirty?
Uncle, this is a young men's world
It's got to be free
Toilet there, room over there
I've said it's not good for aged people
It's good to live like this
Uncle Fung, there's an inn nearby
You'll find it perfect, you have money?
Take the money, no interest required
You don't even have to pay me back
This is not at all a good place
Uncle Fung, we have a big place
Great, I can save $200
Here is $100
enough for your taxi fare home
Lin, get my slippers for me
Ok, since you like it
I can't help, I'll...
I'll just take a bath
That bastard comes again...
Just take your bath
Take a quick bath
Up and down, rub gently
Uncle, your slippers
Uncle Fung
why don't you come to my place?
Pack the slippers
Up and down, gently
care for my gum...
So fast?
Not yet fixed?
Why is it so noisy outside?
Why so noisy?
What are you doing?
Stop, don't ever touch that...
What do you mean?
You bastard!
?
What are you trying to do?
Uncle, you're too much
this is my home
Hey, you...
Uncle, I warn you
Take away that lamp
A prayer a day makes you alert...
Senior is amending feng shui
of your home
Why must you keep standing by him?
What do you want?
A fight!
Let's go!
Don't think you can make use of
the chance
Shit!
I'm taking back my clothes
Senior, I'll pick you up at 9 tomorrow
Go away!
Uncle, where am I to sleep?
Toilet or bath tub, as you like
and there's perfect inn nearby
Uncle... take it out, will you?
What is it?
The remote control
I don't speak English
You'd better take it out this minute
Uncle
Why don't you sleep?
Come here
Uncle, please take it out
I can't stand anymore
This is a new bed
Well, count the lambs
Sing and make me sleep, please
Ok...
A lamb at the river bank...
fall in the river...
Meh...
Why don't you become a singer?
But it requires technces
Did I wake you up?
But I'm used to doing exercise
before sleeping
Ok, I'll get tea and watch you do it
Get tea? Get me a coffee
Why? What happened last night?
You set up an altar?
It's so hard to predict!
You can't get along with him
but I can!
I can't put up with him a bit
Morning!
Senior, where are we starting today?
We'll go to Tsim Sha Tsui
!
Great!
Go shopping?
Senior... where are you taking me exactly?
This is opened by Chu's boyfriend, Eddie
Didn't you check it?
Uncle
you should have informed us about that
We need a warrant to enter
private premises
We still must go
even if we don't have one
What then?
Watch him or he'll make a mess
what can i do for youCan I help you?
Can I help you?
Senior, let me do this trivial things
Excust me i want go inside to see
Sorry, I want have a look
OK, I want join the club
I am police
This is no police club!
Don't be too smart
Miss, I'm from Commercial Crime Bureau
We suspect of forget money in the market
you'd better cooperate
if you don't want to suffer and loss
Sure...
Open up the cash till
Sure...
There's problem
It's not my fault...
Who gave you this?
Maybe Keung gave me this
Chinaboy Keung?
Don't shoot!
Does he often gives you money?
No... I don't know him very well
For your safety, crouch down...
Thanks
Crouch down
Senior, get inside
Uncle, don't say I care not for you
Stand behind us if anything happens
Are you afraid?
Yes, I'm afraid I can't safeguard you
Senior, let us do this tedious job
Brother
Wait!
Thanks, is Eddie here?
Who wants him?
This is CID
What do you want?
Kepp calm
Who do you want?
Is Eddie in?
Wait a minute
Hello, Eddie, your call
Thanks
Hello, who's it?
Who are you?
Admission only for member
This is CID
We want to talk to Eddie about a case
What's special with CID?
I'm Keung
Is there evidence of our forget money?
Where's evidence? Show me
Don't act rashly...
Eddie's inside
What is it? What's special with cops?
HK is a law-abiding place
Shit your place!
You insult me?
You assult police officers!
Cuff him!
Don't move! Cuff him!
Don't chase
Don't block the way
Take it for me
Take it?
Get off the car
Stop...
I'm police officer
I demand using your car to chase thieves
ok?
Good cooperation!
Brother...
How's it? Did you chase him?
Where's he?
In vain!
What, Uncle Fung let him get off!
He meant to let him off
but without bait!
It's Ok... let's go back to the station
What are you doing, Uncle Fung?
Chasing by fortune-telling
Nut!
What nut? Young man
They're worshipping fairies, do it better
Young man, what's he doing?
He's not worshipping?
How can I know what he's up to?
You don't know him?
Officer Lam!
You said you didn't know him?
I've found him, let's chase him
What about him now?
Take up the incense and it'll be fine
Take up the incense and he will...
Help take up the incense...
?
How come?
What is it?
Let's go
It's stink!
I must search as it's our rules!
Sorry!
Come in
Boss!
Police come for Chu!
Boss won't keep anything you've touched!
Clean the blood on your forehead
I want money to flee
You will die soon, why bother?
Spare me...
There's people like us in police force?
Get ready
Yes
Stop!
Reverse!
Drive up there
It's not a drive
What is going on?
That car
A powerful one
Uncle, take us as your understudy
The car's here
but he's nowhere to be found
He must be inside
How do you know?
You hear what he says
Look, two snakes outside the door
and the sun can't get in
there's fog around
so it's the place for him
it's a suitable place, I say
Uncle, we're investigating
not feng shui!
You don't believe?
If we take this as evidence in court
the judge will send you to prison surely
I care only about catching thieves
22376, stand here
You are to call headquarters now
and send men to check the car and
to barricade the scene
You mustn't take your own action, ok?
Brother
This is an order
hey, do you mean it?
You want me to be a man of Feng Shui
or a cop?
Tell me...
Sorry, teacher
Uncle, being your supervisor
I order you to lay an eye on the car
come on
I must sure you...
Teacher, is he all right?
I must sue you...
The most is to change a car
I hope he is all right
Look, there's mud all over the garden
This should be a lime land
Is lime white in color?
It's black and white!
It's really lime powder
what's the use of it?
Carbon powder humid resistant
and lime powder preserve things
This is traditionally way to
preserving bodies
There's glass
Division of Nine Daisies
Division of Nine Daisies?
All magic and things come from China
At Tang Dynasty
China and Japan got in trade
That division was found then
What's the use of glass?
To gather mist and sun, moon power
so as to make a body use
It's black magic
Teacher, then...
But it gets into black magic
I see, teacher
You tested it with your jade
and found they are of the devil side?
Let's get rid of the devils, teacher
It's very dangerous inside
What about now?
Again?
Swivel!
Uncle, say if anything's wrong
I'll complain about you when we're back
If we can solve cases by worshipping
why don't we hire Taoist priests as cops?
Teacher, brother, I've checked...
Apples are sweet!
No!
Let's go
What information is there?
I've found the owner has a
Japanese restaurant
Has he?
Yes
I'll check on my own without Uncle
No, it's better to check with teacher
He'll just spoil everything
let's go
Uncle, we're going to cinema
Yes, teacher
where're you going?
To cinema
I've bought some food for you, eat it first
No, thanks
We're indeed very hungry
You...
Uncle
I've told you not to run about
Knowing you work hard
I bought you this
Great, it's a hamburger
Yes, Officer Lam loves hamburgers
Officer Lam
Pour me a glass of water
It's a tough case
Sure it is, the car got ruined
but no news
Teacher
is there other way to control the body?
There're five ways
but all requires spells
but nothing is on her body
I know, Uncle
We can catch the man once
we find the spell?
Shit!
I'll get you another
Let's go, time's up
Let's eat on the way
We shall go together
You go too?
To mortuary, there's clue
There's clue?
Get incenses!
Evidence is on the head, drag it out
Yes!
Fire!
Fire!
They used an Ice Spell
Ice Spell?
Right, ice melts once inside human body
so nothing came up in the report
Uncle, you are smart
You can figure this out!
Let's go, time's up
Sorry, we're leaving now
Let's go
Let's go
What are you doing?
Lock him up so that he won't block us
No, it's so cold inside
You want to freeze him?
No, he won't be frozen!
Let's go
Let him out
I'll let him out only after our work
Let me sign this first
Watch out!
Shit! What are you up to?
You want to knock me down, get out!
Get the key here, gun's of no use
Don't try to be a hero
It's a car key
Knock him over
Hold on
Moving body! Teacher, moving body!
Climb up!
!
Sure!
Don't get down or you'll die
How come?
So mighty?
Teacher, help!
Drag me up now
Be careful!
Get up!
Take it
Yes
I got it
I caught it
No!
Get up
Get help
What now?
Three persons are too heavy
It's bad!
Run fast
Yes!
Fire!
Hide yourselves!
I...
Teacher, it's coming
Light the fire!
Not here!
Run fast
You burnt the mortuary, why?
Investigation!
Investigation? Corpses assulted you or
someone robbed the corpses?
How am I to write the report?
Write accordingly, I've told you that
Ok, but you needn't have made
such a mess!
Officer Lam!
Yes Sir
Why is there such a mess?
Say if you find him lousy!
It's Ok, just tell him
Uncle is very stubborn
he rejects orders, and old-fashioned too
he has no sense of science
Is there any praise?
He's a good cop
You mean he's a good cop?
I'm just doing my duty
Just then you said he was stubborn
but he has his principles
you said he's old-fashioned?
But it works
He as no sense of science?
But this case accounts for no science
You mean you believe in him?
I'd have died if I hadn't believed him
He rescued me!
Have you finished?
Take it out with you
Ok, since you are so cooperative
I'll support you even though I must quit
Yes Sir!
Take the clothes for your life-saver!
By the way, Officer Ma
Go on eating
You like noodle, this is for you
You are so good to me
Different food each meal, so troublesome
Let's eat together
Ok, it's much better this way
It saves all the trouble
It's like a family eating together
Yeah... like a good family
We will soon solve the case
This is no ordinary thieves
You two are absolutely not up to it
so I'll arrange everything from now on
or you'll get in danger
Thanks, teacher
Not you, but him
I'd better get some water
Hey, brother
Uncle, is Officer Lam in danger?
Do you know the power of the jade?
Cast evils away, it's your protector!
Give whoever needs it!
I will, Uncle
Brother, show respect to older people
I've swallowed it
Hush...
Sorry, wait a minute, I'll be back soon
What is it?
I want...
What do you want?
I want you to go away as
I want to see Officer Lam
Officer Lam again, why?
Uncle really cares about you
This jade casts evils away, put it on
Be frank, if Uncle gives me this jade
I won't be happy
But if it's given by you
I'll take it as a love gift
Lousy!
Shit, it's a failure!
You must put it on!
With earnest!
Uncle, whatever you say!
Morning, teacher
where shall we go today?
We go nowhere today
Lay an eye on him and don't let him
fool around
Teacher, where are you going?
What is it?
Why are you so well dressed?
You needn't be smart
I will beat you for sure
Yeah... let's go
Where to?
You checked the owner has a
Japanese restaurant?
What then?
We mustn't let Uncle think we're helpless
Let's take a look
What are you doing?
Teacher told me before he left
he asked me not to let you fool around
We needn't care about him as
we're cops tool
But he said that!
I won't argue with you
Take me the car key, be quick...
Don't find faults!
Coming...
Didn't you say you'd not go?
I fear you'll ruin my car, right?
Morning!
Welcome!
I feel uneasy here
don't panic!
How many party?
Two
This way please
Please sit down
Why? Why are you looking around?
Don't you find that girl strange?
Is she like the girl last time?
You needn't be afraid, right?
You have it, but I don't
It's no use checking in here
I'd better leave now
Leave? Sit down
We're investigating drug trafficking
what do you want?
You mean there're subways once
we open the door?
And drug makers
greet you?
Is it like this?
No, I...
We can finally meet face to face
But I don't know you, what to say?
I'd better not beat the bush
Don't be lousy, I've warned you!
Take it if you don't find me lousy
We are from different groups
we'll both suffer if we fight on
What about having a drink?
Since you propose of peace
then it's a deal, we'll leave
Let's go
You can't just leave like this
Can't we? What must we do?
There's a saying:
All of you is from your parents
I break my hair, anyone who eats words
will result this way
Ok... no problem...
All of you is from your parents...
Don't move!
Making a phone call?
So there's someone else
Kill him!
Someone will rescue him
I wonder who saves him
Uncle, rescue Officer Lam now
he'll soon die
Teacher, try your best
Teacher, just then we...
I know, he got trapped and is freezing
Can you rescue him?
Every man has three fires
We can force the fires on his head
and into his veins
then he'll feel warm
and won't be freezing anymore
But he's unconscious
But you are conscious!
I?
Concentrate and close your eyes
I can't!
I'll help you
Teacher, he's swelling
Shit! There's something in his mouth
and that will swell and contract!
Don't get the head out of the fridge
I'll come to help if it contracts
Uncle, his heart beats stop
what shall we do?
It's ok!
Get some inflammable material and
block the doors
Help, Uncle
Let me go, Uncle, help!
Uncle, help, help me quick!
Lin...
I'm not Taoist
that mirror has no effect on me
Uncle...
Get down now
Yes!
Bitch!
How is it?
Teacher!
Uncle, how are you?
I'm ok
Teacher, what are you doing?
I'll see what it will do
No need, it must die like this
Hey... do it
Not it!
This is blind!
Run quick!
Uncle!
Pull me up
Teacher isn't dead!
Teacher, are you Ok?
I'm alright
Uncle
Let's see Lin
Sure, let's go
I've found a mirror
Crawl down!
Look outside
Put it up, don't let go
- Help teacher up there
- Uncle!
Try not to get close to that pile!
Teacher
I'll take you for good food next time
Walk faster
Aunt, sorry!
Nut!
Teacher, what rule is this?
Why must we jump while walking past?
Sand got in my shoes!
Still some sand in that shoe!
Get in the boat!
Thanks!
Goodbye! I'll see you if I have time
Sure!
Bye!
Get going!
Bye!
Bye!
Uncle
I left my walkman in Officer Lam's house
I'll come back by the next boat
Take it
Lay an eye for me
Just three days
it's deal
Bye!
Teacher
I'll accompany you for three days
I want three day leave, three days!
Bastard! You're smart this time
Bye!
Bye!
electric appliances for his son again
Chu is so good to her late father
She wrote that she met a boy
and got a job
I do want a job but uncle objects
With hell money, bribe all ghost officers
This year is TV set and video recorder
next year will be a car and a house
with fridge and washing machine
so you must bless me
Dear dad and mom
this is all for this year
I'll burn you more if I make more money
next year
Uncle Fung
Don't pee onto the burning pot
Go back as your father wants you
Aunt Sam, you set fire on something
Shit, I get clumsy as I'm old
Don't blow
Uncle
It's most unlucky to be put out while
burning
Why?
The Hell Gate is opened only once a year
They all want their family to burn them
something
If they get frustrated
what do you think will happen?
Excuse me
Don't blow, Aunt Sam
Why?
Ghost!
It's Ok...
Lin, get some incense here
Aunt Sam, kneel down
Amida Buddha... I didn't mean it
Amida Buddha
Apologize with earnest
Don't blame me
Ok, Aunt Sam, get up
Aunt, it accepts your apology
Does it?
Lin, help Aunt for a rest
Really Ok?
Yes, go and take a rest
Mind your steps
Don't blame me...
Am I really alright?
Yes, don't worry
Yeah, don't worry, go and take a rest
Ghost!
She didn't mean it
Ghost!You ask for this!
Uncle Fung, help... don't
Lin!
It scared me much
Burn incense for it every second and
sixteenth monthly
Yes.
Why are you laughing?
Uncle, you're like a Taoist priest
more than a cop
Both of them work for people
Beer
Waiter, give me some water
Sure.
Thanks, give me some more chips
Give me another ashtray
Don't fool me much
Officer Lam ordered us to disguise well
so you're waiter while I'm guest
You sly!
Don't chat while working
You must fool me too?
Officer Lam ordered me to
You'll know when we finish
Hey, brother
Call me Officer Lam while working
not brother
Ok, you want me to be waiter
but you're enjoying yourself here!
Can you play the piano?
No
That's it
Hey, no news so far
Is the information correct?
What it we retreat?
Is that girl pretty
Sir, we're waiting for a drug transaction
Let's woo girls after work
We've been in here for 2 hour's
What do you mean?
Don't you think we need a companion?
You're getting horny
I find you very stupid
I see, you mean something bad about her?
Just take a look
She has never moved since she came
and her hand has fixed on the briefcase
you think?
Let's question her
Wait for 10 more seconds
What's the difference?
Wait till the song is over
Head, what news?
Single girl? Easy job!
Miss... it's not good? Miss...
Miss, can I sit here?
Miss, we are cops
I suspect a problem about your case
Open it up
You agree if you don't stay a word?
Officer Lam, something here
Freeze!
Miss, I'm charging you of refusal of arrest
drug trafficking, and assulting officers
Don't run
What's the case?
Whatever it is
Chase
Don't run, stand there...
Hold her...
Miss, don't fool anymore
You bitch!
You have help?
Hands up
No, I can't manage it myself
That car, be quick
Officer Lam
Open the door
Call for reinforcement
Hey man, how to write the report?
But on one will believe it
Is it finished?
Nearly
Let me have a look...
At that moment
a Chinese girl broke the window
I, No.2237, flew in there
and we crashed, quite nice...
Why didn't you type it for me?
But I'm only typing a resignation letter
You'd better become a fiction writer
How dare you fool me?
Don't you find her strange?
A bit
You've been there for 2 hours
Can't you find anything about her?
Yes, she lives in Tung Pin Chau
with a granny 78 years old
Everyone calls her Aunt Sam
What again?
Call her and see the body
Are you very tired?
Can't you just use your mind?
Why must you find fault in me?
She is 70 something years old
and you asks her out from Tung Pin Chau
she will need much rest, right?
If I were your buddy
I would break up with you
Can't we fool about?
There's lice on you hair
You have lice there
you're fooling me!
Let's not play
Call up Tung Pin Chau
and ask our men to check
and send you a report
Thanks!
Uncle
Uncle
it's good to go downtown occasionally
Let's go to Sogo, shall we?
I'll go shopping with you
You needn't make up excuse
We'll see the body with Aunt Sam and
back to headquarters
We needn't go anywhere
Uncle!
What did you promise me?
Ask for uncle's permission
if I must go out
I can only see movies with uncle
I mustn't chat with boys
unless I desert uncle
Unless you're with uncle!
Are you alone?
With my uncle
It's good
Your father's dead?
And your mother?
It's a pity
Don't panic
you can get married a second time
Mind you words!
Sorry... is it dirty?
Uncle, you hit him wrongly
He's cleaning it for me
Uncle... sorry it's a misunderstanding...
Who's seeing body of Chan Chu Chu?
I!
Be quick, it's off duty time
Senior, I'm Sergeant 2273
I come to pick you up
Senior, this way please
Uncle, what about...
Where was she shot?
On her leg
It's strange!
Why, there's always a hole if shot
by bullet
But it will always be swollen!
Yeah, why?
Unless she was dead before she got shot!
But she was energetic before she got shot
and dragged me a long way
A dead body will still move
How come a dead body moves?
That's reaction of the joints
There're many way to make a dead body
move
Senior, you're smart
How did she get injured in the head?
No idea, I didn't hit on her head
Where's the autopsy report?
At the police station
Let's read it right away
Sure
Senior, this
Pang, how about the gambling money?
Owe you for the time being
Senior, this way
Chi, two tee
Sure
Is tea OK?
Hot water will do
One hot water, one tea
Yes!
Officer Lam is not yet back, let's wait
The report is nearly done
Head, why is that old bad here?
What old bag? He's Uncle Fung
Senior of Tung Pin Chau
He was a cop before you were born, nut!
I'll go and find Officer Lam
Serve him well
Uncle Fung, water
Thanks
What's going on?
怎么回事?
What? The computer is broken again?
There's no response!
Officer Lam
that computer broke down again
That nut must have kicked off the plug
why are you beautifully dressed?
To go out with you
You mean it?
Sure, he's our man from Tung Pin Chau
He wants to see you
Hi, Uncle, come in
Officer Lam, the report is ready
Good girl, so short time?
I'll get you some candies next time
Sorry, Uncle
Why this?
Hey, where've you been
I've been looking for you
This is Uncle Fung
our senior from Tung Pin Chau
We've met already
You've met? Uncle Fung is smart
just then at the mortuary
a dead body jumped up as he touched it
It scared me much
We're cops but you act like a story-teller
We ask for science
Senior, sit down
You might chat
while I go on with my work
Right, Uncle, this time you come
is about statement of Aunt Sam, right?
That's it
Uncle
I'm sure you've been taught in academy
the way for a brief statement is...
neat, straight, quick
simple, comprehensible, accordingly
I think you can begin
No idea
Uncle, what no idea?
Your or she?
You must have been taught in academy
for a calm analysis about statement
Think it over
Uncle, we all want to solve the case early
Are you fooling us as you said so?
What is it?
Man, if it weren't a strange case
I wouldn't have come
Ok... if what you're going to say
is helpful to the case
I do want to listen
Didn't you want to read
the autopsy report?
Right, I suspect it was dead
before it got shot
You mean I met a ghost?
No, but it was already dead
Uncle, how can a dead body be
drug trafficker?
No, just then at the mortuary...
Shut up!
Uncle, it's now a modern world
and you're so superstitious?
You're superficial!
Uncle
should we offer her a service?
She's not a ghost
You, Ok... she's not a ghost
but she is already dead
tell me what she is then!
She's a dead body
Is she a vampire?
There are many kinds of dead bodies
Dead body long ago will become vampire
If it doesn't stiffen, it's a moving body
I suspect someone's making use of
moving body for drug trafficking
Attention!
Fung Zee!
Whenever I hear about myths
I know it's you
You haven't changed all these years
Why do you keep standing here
like a post?
No, sir, we're discussing about a case
Uncle Fung mentions about someone may
be drug trafficking with moving bodies
Shit, you're a policeman
how can you say such lousy things?
I'll leave now
Want to listen to the case?
Come to my office for a reunion
Officer Lam, come too
Yes Sir
This is for you, sign it
Still hard job
If you hadn't had so much principles then
you would be sitting here now
But principles are principles
Ok, I'll leave it here
Just sign it whenever you like
Let's not beat the bush
Officer Lam
Yes, yes sir
This is classified as confidential now
You're not to mention to anyone except
your men
Yes Sir!
The autopsy report is back
After studying
she died 7 days before the case
No, is the doctor nut?
I do find it strange
Zee, this is just your case
what do you think?
Officer Ma, you believe him?
Sure! When we were partners
he was famous of solving cases quickly
and he solved many strange cases
You needn't flatter me
Officer Lam, just cancel this case
Burn the body!
Yes Sir!
You mustn't burn the body
Hold!
But people will suspect if we keep
the body!
Burn it
We'll have no clues if we bury it
Reasonable, go ahead
You needn't play tricks
I'll do whatever is deserved
Terrific!
But you mustn't hid anything from me
You must report whatever it is
No problem
this is for the sake of everybody
Officer Lam!
Yes Sir
From now on
you'll investigate with Uncle Fung
What di you say?
And to save the moving around
of Uncle Fung
he will move and live with you
You mean it?
It's fixed
Hello, Office Ma, I...
This is an order, go out
Yes Sir!
Right, Officer Ma
you said he soved cases quickly
but why didn't he get promotion
after so many years?
Right, he was quick at solving cases
but I forgot to say one thing
he made mistakes faster
his nick name is Swivel
and made everywhere a mess
You must lay an eye on him
Why do you let him investigate then?
Only he can solve such a case
Ok, goodbye, sir!
Uncle, see if this dress is nice
I'll find you later
Uncle Fung
Is it delicious?
Take one piece
Help yourself
I'll treat
He's newcomer
Uncle, are you fooling me?
We both have no...
She's Uncle's niece, got it?
Yes
What did Officer Ma say?
Officer Ma asked him to help us
investigate
and he is to live with me
Did you promise him?
Of course I am not willing to
But now...
!
Hello!
I have no girl friend, don't fight with me
It depends then
Why? No need for a key?
This is the key
New technology!
Don't get in the way
Come in, make yourself at home
It's very nice
Please close the door, thanks
this is totally abnormal
Uncle, if it's not the place your like
you can do without it
Uncle, the fist are great
Find the pretties one
Excuse me... please
Good!
What are you doing?
Palm reading is more interesting
Palm reading?
Take it for me
That bath tub is funny
Welcome for a try
Sure
Are you dirty?
Uncle, this is a young men's world
It's got to be free
Toilet there, room over there
I've said it's not good for aged people
It's good to live like this
Uncle Fung, there's an inn nearby
You'll find it perfect, you have money?
Take the money, no interest required
You don't even have to pay me back
This is not at all a good place
Uncle Fung, we have a big place
Great, I can save $200
Here is $100
enough for your taxi fare home
Lin, get my slippers for me
Ok, since you like it
I can't help, I'll...
I'll just take a bath
That bastard comes again...
Just take your bath
Take a quick bath
Up and down, rub gently
Uncle, your slippers
Uncle Fung
why don't you come to my place?
Pack the slippers
Up and down, gently
care for my gum...
So fast?
Not yet fixed?
Why is it so noisy outside?
Why so noisy?
What are you doing?
Stop, don't ever touch that...
What do you mean?
You bastard!
?
What are you trying to do?
Uncle, you're too much
this is my home
Hey, you...
Uncle, I warn you
Take away that lamp
A prayer a day makes you alert...
Senior is amending feng shui
of your home
Why must you keep standing by him?
What do you want?
A fight!
Let's go!
Don't think you can make use of
the chance
Shit!
I'm taking back my clothes
Senior, I'll pick you up at 9 tomorrow
Go away!
Uncle, where am I to sleep?
Toilet or bath tub, as you like
and there's perfect inn nearby
Uncle... take it out, will you?
What is it?
The remote control
I don't speak English
You'd better take it out this minute
Uncle
Why don't you sleep?
Come here
Uncle, please take it out
I can't stand anymore
This is a new bed
Well, count the lambs
Sing and make me sleep, please
Ok...
A lamb at the river bank...
fall in the river...
Meh...
Why don't you become a singer?
But it requires technces
Did I wake you up?
But I'm used to doing exercise
before sleeping
Ok, I'll get tea and watch you do it
Get tea? Get me a coffee
Why? What happened last night?
You set up an altar?
It's so hard to predict!
You can't get along with him
but I can!
I can't put up with him a bit
Morning!
Senior, where are we starting today?
We'll go to Tsim Sha Tsui
!
Great!
Go shopping?
Senior... where are you taking me exactly?
This is opened by Chu's boyfriend, Eddie
Didn't you check it?
Uncle
you should have informed us about that
We need a warrant to enter
private premises
We still must go
even if we don't have one
What then?
Watch him or he'll make a mess
what can i do for youCan I help you?
Can I help you?
Senior, let me do this trivial things
Excust me i want go inside to see
Sorry, I want have a look
OK, I want join the club
I am police
This is no police club!
Don't be too smart
Miss, I'm from Commercial Crime Bureau
We suspect of forget money in the market
you'd better cooperate
if you don't want to suffer and loss
Sure...
Open up the cash till
Sure...
There's problem
It's not my fault...
Who gave you this?
Maybe Keung gave me this
Chinaboy Keung?
Don't shoot!
Does he often gives you money?
No... I don't know him very well
For your safety, crouch down...
Thanks
Crouch down
Senior, get inside
Uncle, don't say I care not for you
Stand behind us if anything happens
Are you afraid?
Yes, I'm afraid I can't safeguard you
Senior, let us do this tedious job
Brother
Wait!
Thanks, is Eddie here?
Who wants him?
This is CID
What do you want?
Kepp calm
Who do you want?
Is Eddie in?
Wait a minute
Hello, Eddie, your call
Thanks
Hello, who's it?
Who are you?
Admission only for member
This is CID
We want to talk to Eddie about a case
What's special with CID?
I'm Keung
Is there evidence of our forget money?
Where's evidence? Show me
Don't act rashly...
Eddie's inside
What is it? What's special with cops?
HK is a law-abiding place
Shit your place!
You insult me?
You assult police officers!
Cuff him!
Don't move! Cuff him!
Don't chase
Don't block the way
Take it for me
Take it?
Get off the car
Stop...
I'm police officer
I demand using your car to chase thieves
ok?
Good cooperation!
Brother...
How's it? Did you chase him?
Where's he?
In vain!
What, Uncle Fung let him get off!
He meant to let him off
but without bait!
It's Ok... let's go back to the station
What are you doing, Uncle Fung?
Chasing by fortune-telling
Nut!
What nut? Young man
They're worshipping fairies, do it better
Young man, what's he doing?
He's not worshipping?
How can I know what he's up to?
You don't know him?
Officer Lam!
You said you didn't know him?
I've found him, let's chase him
What about him now?
Take up the incense and it'll be fine
Take up the incense and he will...
Help take up the incense...
?
How come?
What is it?
Let's go
It's stink!
I must search as it's our rules!
Sorry!
Come in
Boss!
Police come for Chu!
Boss won't keep anything you've touched!
Clean the blood on your forehead
I want money to flee
You will die soon, why bother?
Spare me...
There's people like us in police force?
Get ready
Yes
Stop!
Reverse!
Drive up there
It's not a drive
What is going on?
That car
A powerful one
Uncle, take us as your understudy
The car's here
but he's nowhere to be found
He must be inside
How do you know?
You hear what he says
Look, two snakes outside the door
and the sun can't get in
there's fog around
so it's the place for him
it's a suitable place, I say
Uncle, we're investigating
not feng shui!
You don't believe?
If we take this as evidence in court
the judge will send you to prison surely
I care only about catching thieves
22376, stand here
You are to call headquarters now
and send men to check the car and
to barricade the scene
You mustn't take your own action, ok?
Brother
This is an order
hey, do you mean it?
You want me to be a man of Feng Shui
or a cop?
Tell me...
Sorry, teacher
Uncle, being your supervisor
I order you to lay an eye on the car
come on
I must sure you...
Teacher, is he all right?
I must sue you...
The most is to change a car
I hope he is all right
Look, there's mud all over the garden
This should be a lime land
Is lime white in color?
It's black and white!
It's really lime powder
what's the use of it?
Carbon powder humid resistant
and lime powder preserve things
This is traditionally way to
preserving bodies
There's glass
Division of Nine Daisies
Division of Nine Daisies?
All magic and things come from China
At Tang Dynasty
China and Japan got in trade
That division was found then
What's the use of glass?
To gather mist and sun, moon power
so as to make a body use
It's black magic
Teacher, then...
But it gets into black magic
I see, teacher
You tested it with your jade
and found they are of the devil side?
Let's get rid of the devils, teacher
It's very dangerous inside
What about now?
Again?
Swivel!
Uncle, say if anything's wrong
I'll complain about you when we're back
If we can solve cases by worshipping
why don't we hire Taoist priests as cops?
Teacher, brother, I've checked...
Apples are sweet!
No!
Let's go
What information is there?
I've found the owner has a
Japanese restaurant
Has he?
Yes
I'll check on my own without Uncle
No, it's better to check with teacher
He'll just spoil everything
let's go
Uncle, we're going to cinema
Yes, teacher
where're you going?
To cinema
I've bought some food for you, eat it first
No, thanks
We're indeed very hungry
You...
Uncle
I've told you not to run about
Knowing you work hard
I bought you this
Great, it's a hamburger
Yes, Officer Lam loves hamburgers
Officer Lam
Pour me a glass of water
It's a tough case
Sure it is, the car got ruined
but no news
Teacher
is there other way to control the body?
There're five ways
but all requires spells
but nothing is on her body
I know, Uncle
We can catch the man once
we find the spell?
Shit!
I'll get you another
Let's go, time's up
Let's eat on the way
We shall go together
You go too?
To mortuary, there's clue
There's clue?
Get incenses!
Evidence is on the head, drag it out
Yes!
Fire!
Fire!
They used an Ice Spell
Ice Spell?
Right, ice melts once inside human body
so nothing came up in the report
Uncle, you are smart
You can figure this out!
Let's go, time's up
Sorry, we're leaving now
Let's go
Let's go
What are you doing?
Lock him up so that he won't block us
No, it's so cold inside
You want to freeze him?
No, he won't be frozen!
Let's go
Let him out
I'll let him out only after our work
Let me sign this first
Watch out!
Shit! What are you up to?
You want to knock me down, get out!
Get the key here, gun's of no use
Don't try to be a hero
It's a car key
Knock him over
Hold on
Moving body! Teacher, moving body!
Climb up!
!
Sure!
Don't get down or you'll die
How come?
So mighty?
Teacher, help!
Drag me up now
Be careful!
Get up!
Take it
Yes
I got it
I caught it
No!
Get up
Get help
What now?
Three persons are too heavy
It's bad!
Run fast
Yes!
Fire!
Hide yourselves!
I...
Teacher, it's coming
Light the fire!
Not here!
Run fast
You burnt the mortuary, why?
Investigation!
Investigation? Corpses assulted you or
someone robbed the corpses?
How am I to write the report?
Write accordingly, I've told you that
Ok, but you needn't have made
such a mess!
Officer Lam!
Yes Sir
Why is there such a mess?
Say if you find him lousy!
It's Ok, just tell him
Uncle is very stubborn
he rejects orders, and old-fashioned too
he has no sense of science
Is there any praise?
He's a good cop
You mean he's a good cop?
I'm just doing my duty
Just then you said he was stubborn
but he has his principles
you said he's old-fashioned?
But it works
He as no sense of science?
But this case accounts for no science
You mean you believe in him?
I'd have died if I hadn't believed him
He rescued me!
Have you finished?
Take it out with you
Ok, since you are so cooperative
I'll support you even though I must quit
Yes Sir!
Take the clothes for your life-saver!
By the way, Officer Ma
Go on eating
You like noodle, this is for you
You are so good to me
Different food each meal, so troublesome
Let's eat together
Ok, it's much better this way
It saves all the trouble
It's like a family eating together
Yeah... like a good family
We will soon solve the case
This is no ordinary thieves
You two are absolutely not up to it
so I'll arrange everything from now on
or you'll get in danger
Thanks, teacher
Not you, but him
I'd better get some water
Hey, brother
Uncle, is Officer Lam in danger?
Do you know the power of the jade?
Cast evils away, it's your protector!
Give whoever needs it!
I will, Uncle
Brother, show respect to older people
I've swallowed it
Hush...
Sorry, wait a minute, I'll be back soon
What is it?
I want...
What do you want?
I want you to go away as
I want to see Officer Lam
Officer Lam again, why?
Uncle really cares about you
This jade casts evils away, put it on
Be frank, if Uncle gives me this jade
I won't be happy
But if it's given by you
I'll take it as a love gift
Lousy!
Shit, it's a failure!
You must put it on!
With earnest!
Uncle, whatever you say!
Morning, teacher
where shall we go today?
We go nowhere today
Lay an eye on him and don't let him
fool around
Teacher, where are you going?
What is it?
Why are you so well dressed?
You needn't be smart
I will beat you for sure
Yeah... let's go
Where to?
You checked the owner has a
Japanese restaurant?
What then?
We mustn't let Uncle think we're helpless
Let's take a look
What are you doing?
Teacher told me before he left
he asked me not to let you fool around
We needn't care about him as
we're cops tool
But he said that!
I won't argue with you
Take me the car key, be quick...
Don't find faults!
Coming...
Didn't you say you'd not go?
I fear you'll ruin my car, right?
Morning!
Welcome!
I feel uneasy here
don't panic!
How many party?
Two
This way please
Please sit down
Why? Why are you looking around?
Don't you find that girl strange?
Is she like the girl last time?
You needn't be afraid, right?
You have it, but I don't
It's no use checking in here
I'd better leave now
Leave? Sit down
We're investigating drug trafficking
what do you want?
You mean there're subways once
we open the door?
And drug makers
greet you?
Is it like this?
No, I...
We can finally meet face to face
But I don't know you, what to say?
I'd better not beat the bush
Don't be lousy, I've warned you!
Take it if you don't find me lousy
We are from different groups
we'll both suffer if we fight on
What about having a drink?
Since you propose of peace
then it's a deal, we'll leave
Let's go
You can't just leave like this
Can't we? What must we do?
There's a saying:
All of you is from your parents
I break my hair, anyone who eats words
will result this way
Ok... no problem...
All of you is from your parents...
Don't move!
Making a phone call?
So there's someone else
Kill him!
Someone will rescue him
I wonder who saves him
Uncle, rescue Officer Lam now
he'll soon die
Teacher, try your best
Teacher, just then we...
I know, he got trapped and is freezing
Can you rescue him?
Every man has three fires
We can force the fires on his head
and into his veins
then he'll feel warm
and won't be freezing anymore
But he's unconscious
But you are conscious!
I?
Concentrate and close your eyes
I can't!
I'll help you
Teacher, he's swelling
Shit! There's something in his mouth
and that will swell and contract!
Don't get the head out of the fridge
I'll come to help if it contracts
Uncle, his heart beats stop
what shall we do?
It's ok!
Get some inflammable material and
block the doors
Help, Uncle
Let me go, Uncle, help!
Uncle, help, help me quick!
Lin...
I'm not Taoist
that mirror has no effect on me
Uncle...
Get down now
Yes!
Bitch!
How is it?
Teacher!
Uncle, how are you?
I'm ok
Teacher, what are you doing?
I'll see what it will do
No need, it must die like this
Hey... do it
Not it!
This is blind!
Run quick!
Uncle!
Pull me up
Teacher isn't dead!
Teacher, are you Ok?
I'm alright
Uncle
Let's see Lin
Sure, let's go
I've found a mirror
Crawl down!
Look outside
Put it up, don't let go
- Help teacher up there
- Uncle!
Try not to get close to that pile!
Teacher
I'll take you for good food next time
Walk faster
Aunt, sorry!
Nut!
Teacher, what rule is this?
Why must we jump while walking past?
Sand got in my shoes!
Still some sand in that shoe!
Get in the boat!
Thanks!
Goodbye! I'll see you if I have time
Sure!
Bye!
Get going!
Bye!
Bye!
Uncle
I left my walkman in Officer Lam's house
I'll come back by the next boat
Take it
Lay an eye for me
Just three days
it's deal
Bye!
Teacher
I'll accompany you for three days
I want three day leave, three days!
Bastard! You're smart this time
Bye!
Bye!