Love's Labour's Lost (2000) - full transcript

The King of Navarre and his three companions swear a very public oath to study together and to renounce women for three years. Their honour is immediately put to the test by the arrival of the Princess of France and her three lovely companions. It's love at first sight for all concerned followed by the men's highly entertaining but hopeless efforts to disguise their feelings.

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
BUENA VISTA TELEVISION

[ Newsreel Narrator ] SEPTEMBER
1939. OMINOUS CLOUDS OF WAR
MAY BE GATHERING OVER EUROPE,

BUT HERE IN NAVARRE,
THE YOUNG KING--

SEEN HERE RETURNING
FROM MILITARY MANEUVERS--

HAS ANNOUNCED AN AUDACIOUS PLAN
FOR HIMSELF AND HIS COURT.

HE AND HIS COMPANIONS
ARE TO CAST OFF
THEIR MILITARY UNIFORMS...

WHILE WORLD EVENTS STILL ALLOW,
AND DEVOTE THEMSELVES INSTEAD...

TO A RIGOROUS
THREE YEARS OF STUDY.

THAT'S RIGHT, THREE YEARS.
THEY'LL SLEEP LITTLE,
EAT AND DRINK LESS...

AND DEVOTE THEMSELVES INSTEAD
TO AN INSPIRING PROGRAM
OF SELF-IMPROVEMENT--

A REAL FEAST
FOR BOOKWORMS.



BOLDEST OF ALL,
PERHAPS, IS THE KING'S
ABSOLUTE INSISTENCE...

THAT NO WOMEN WILL BE ALLOWED
INSIDE THE COURT.

SORRY, LADIES,
BUT HE IS THE KING.

THERE IS JUST ONE EXCEPTION--
MADAME HOLOFERNIA, THE KING'S
PRINCIPAL TUTOR.

WITH HER ABLE ASSISTANT
SIR NATHANIEL TAKING CARE
OF THE MEN'S SPIRITUAL HEALTH,

THEY SHOULD HAVE
EVERYTHING THEY NEED...

TO DISTRACT THEMSELVES
FROM THOUGHTS OF ROMANCE.

WHOOPS!
CAREFUL, SIR.
IT'S A TALL ORDER, BY GOLLY,

BUT THIS ABLE YOUNG MONARCH,
ONE OF EUROPE'S MOST ELIGIBLE
ROYAL BACHELORS,

SEEMS DETERMINED TO SHOW
THE WORLD THERE'S MORE
TO LIFE THAN GUNS AND WARFARE.

HE'S AN IDEALIST,
BUT WE WISH HIM
AND HIS THREE CHUMS THE BEST.

WE'LL BRING YOU MORE NEWS
AS THE ADVENTURE UNFOLDS,

BUT FOR NOW WE WISH THEM
BON VOYAGE AND GOOD LUCK.

YOU THREE--



BEROWNE, DUMAINE...

AND LONGAVILLE...

HAVE SWORN FOR
THREE YEARS TERM
TO LIVE WITH ME,

MY FELLOW SCHOLARS,

AND TO KEEP THOSE STATUTES
THAT ARE RECORDED...

IN THIS...
SCHEDULE HERE.

YOUR OATHS ARE PASSED,
AND NOW SUBSCRIBE
YOUR NAMES...

THAT HIS OWN HAND
MAY STRIKE HIS HONOR DOWN...

THAT VIOLATES
THE SMALLEST BRANCH HEREIN.

IF YOU ARE ARMED TO DO...

AS SWORN TO DO,

SUBSCRIBE TO
YOUR DEEP OATHS...

AND KEEP IT, TOO.

I AM RESOLVED.

'TIS BUT
A THREE YEARS' FAST.

THE MIND
SHALL BANQUET...

THOUGH THE BODY PINE.

TO LOVE,
TO WEALTH,

TO POMP I PINE
AND DIE,

WITH ALL THESE
LIVING IN PHILOSOPHY.

SO MUCH, DEAR LIEGE,
I HAVE ALREADY SWORN--

THAT IS, TO LIVE
AND STUDY HERE THREE YEARS.

BUT THERE ARE OTHER
STRICT OBSERVANCES

AS NOT TO SEE
A WOMAN IN THAT TERM,

AND ONE DAY IN A WEEK
TO TOUCH NO FOOD...

AND BUT ONE MEAL
ON EVERY DAY BESIDES,

AND THEN TO SLEEP BUT
THREE HOURS IN THE NIGHT

AND NOT BE SEEN TO YAWN
OF ALL THE DAY?

OH.

THESE ARE BARREN TASKS,
TOO HARD TO KEEP--

NOT TO SEE LADIES, STUDY,
FAST, NOT SLEEP.

YOUR OATH IS PASSED
TO PASS AWAY FROM THESE.

LET ME SAY NO, MY LIEGE,
AND IF YOU PLEASE,

I ONLY SWORE TO STUDY
WITH YOUR GRACE...

AND STAY HERE IN YOUR COURT
FOR THREE YEARS' SPACE.

YOU SWORE TO THAT,
BEROWNE, AND TO THE REST.

BY YEA AND NAY, SIR.
THEN I HAD SWORE IN JEST.

WHAT IS THE END OF STUDY,
LET ME KNOW?

WHY, THAT TO KNOW WHICH ELSE
WE SHOULD NOT KNOW.

THINGS HID AND BARRED,
YOU MEAN, FROM COMMON SENSE?

AYE, THAT IS STUDY'S
GOD-LIKE RECOMPENSE.

AS THUS-- TO STUDY
WHERE I WELL MAY DINE...

WHEN I TO FEAST
EXPRESSLY AM FORBID,

OR STUDY WHERE TO MEET
SOME MISTRESS FINE...

WHEN MISTRESSES
FROM COMMON SENSE ARE HID.

THESE BE THE STOPS
THAT HINDER STUDY QUITE...

AND TRAIN OUR INTELLECTS
TO VAIN DELIGHT.

WHY, ALL DELIGHTS
ARE VAIN.

* I'VE SEEN FOR DAYS THAT
YOU'VE GOT SOME WAYS
THAT MUST BE CHECKED *

* IN YOU I NEVER
CAN DETECT *

* THE SLIGHTEST SIGN
OF INTELLECT *

* YOUR MADAM DANCES
THINK OF THE CHANCES
YOU NEGLECT *

* YOU NEVER SEEM INCLINED
TO USE YOUR MIND *

* YOU'RE JUST
A FELLA WHO *

* HAS GOT HIS BRAINS
IN HIS DANCING SHOES *

* TAKE A LESSON
FROM ME *

* I'D RATHER CHARLESTON

* DO-DO, DO-DO
* DO-DO, DO-DO

* THINK OF WHAT
YOU MIGHT BE *

* I'D RATHER CHARLESTON

* DO-DO, DO-DO
* DO-DO, DO-DO

* I'M DISAPPOINTED
IN YOU AND YOUR WAYS *

* I'M DOUBLE-JOINTED

* THERE'S NO SENSATION
LIKE SYNCOPATION *

* WILL YOU
LET ME KNOW WHY *

* I'D RATHER CHARLESTON

* CHARLESTON ?

* THAT'S THE SORT OF THING
I WOULD NEVER DO, SO *

* LEAVE IT BEHIND
AND GIVE YOUR MIND
TO SOMETHING NEW *

* I'D RATHER CHARLESTON
CHARLESTON, CHARLESTON *

* CHARLESTON
CHARLESTON WITH YOU *

WELL, SIT YOU OUT.

GO HOME, BEROWNE.
ADIEU.

NO, MY GOOD LORD.
I HAVE SWORN
TO STAY WITH YOU.

[ Berowne ]
BUT THERE ARE OTHER
STRICT OBSERVANCES.

"THAT NO WOMAN SHALL COME
WITHIN A MILE OF MY COURT."

HATH THIS
BEEN PROCLAIMED?

FOUR DAYS AGO.

LET'S SEE THE PENALTY.
"ON PAIN OF LOSING
HER TONGUE."

WHO DEVISED
THIS PENALTY?

MARRY, THAT DID I.

SWEET LORD, AND WHY?

WELL, TO FRIGHT THEM HENCE
WITH THE DREAD PENALTY.

A DANGEROUS LAW
AGAINST GENTILITY.

"ITEM: IF ANY MAN BE SEEN
TO TALK WITH A WOMAN WITHIN
THE TERM OF THREE YEARS,

"HE SHALL ENDURE
SUCH PUBLIC SHAME
AS THE REST OF THE COURT...

CAN POSSIBLE DEVISE."

THIS ARTICLE, MY LIEGE,
YOURSELF MUST BREAK,
FOR WELL--

YOU KNOW, HERE COMES
IN EMBASSY THE FRENCH
KING'S DAUGHTER...

WITH YOURSELF TO SPEAK,
A MAID OF GRACE
AND COMPLETE MAJESTY...

ABOUT SURRENDER UP
OF AQUITANE TO HER DECREPIT,
SICK AND BEDRID FATHER.

THEREFORE, THIS ARTICLE
IS MADE IN VAIN,

OR VAINLY COMES
THE ADMIRED PRINCESS
HITHER.

AH!
AH!

WHAT SAY YOU, LORDS?
WHY, THIS WAS QUITE FORGOT.

WE MUST OF FORCE
DISPENSE WITH THIS DECREE.

SHE MUST LIE HERE
ON MERE... NECESSITY.

NECESSITY WILL MAKE US ALL
FORSWORN 3,000 TIMES...

WITHIN THIS
THREE YEARS SPACE,

FOR EVERY MAN WITH HIS
AFFECTS IS BORN,

NOT BY MIGHT MASTERED,
BUT BY SPECIAL GRACE.

IF I BREAK FAITH, THIS WORD
SHALL SPEAK FOR ME.

I AM FORSWORN
ON MERE NECESSITY.

SO, TO THE LAWS
AT LARGE,

I WRITE MY NAME
AND HE THAT BREAKS THEM
IN THE LEAST DEGREE...

STANDS IN ATTAINDER...

OF ETERNAL SHAME.

SUGGESTIONS ARE
TO OTHERS AS TO ME,

BUT I BELIEVE--
ALTHOUGH I SEEM SO
LOATH--

I AM THE LAST
THAT WILL LAST...

BREAK HIS OATH.

GOOD BOYET,
YOU ARE NOT IGNORANT
ALL-TELLING FAME.

DOTH NOISE ABROAD NAVARRE
HATH MADE A VOW...

TILL PAINFUL STUDY SHALL
OUTWEAR THREE YEARS,

NO WOMAN MAY APPROACH
HIS SILENT COURT.

THEREFORE, TO US IT SEEMETH
A NEEDFUL COURSE,

BEFORE WE ENTER
HIS FORBIDDEN GATES,
TO KNOW HIS PLEASURE,

AND IN THAT BEHALF,
BOLD OF YOUR WORTHINESS,

WE SINGLE YOU AS OUR
BEST-MOVING FAIR SOLICITOR.

TELL HIM THE DAUGHTER
OF THE KING OF FRANCE,

ON SERIOUS BUSINESS,
CRAVING QUICK DISPATCH...

IMPORTUNES PERSONAL CONFERENCE
WITH HIS GRACE.

PROUD OF EMPLOYMENT,
WILLINGLY I GO.

ALL PRIDE IS WILLING PRIDE,
AND YOURS IS SO.

[ Chuckles ]

WHO ARE THE VOTARIES,
MY LOVING MAIDS,

THAT ARE VOW-FELLOWS
WITH THIS VIRTUOUS DUKE?

LORD LONGAVILLE IS ONE.
KNOW YOU THE MAN?

I KNOW HIM, MADAM.

AT A MARRIAGE FEAST IN NORMANDY
SAW I THIS LONGAVILLE.

WHO ARE THE REST?

THE YOUNG DUMAINE.

I SAW HIM
AT THE DUKE ALENCON'S ONCE.

ANOTHER OF THESE
STUDENTS AT THAT TIME
WAS THERE WITH HIM,

IF I HAVE
HEARD A TRUTH.

BEROWNE THEY CALL HIM.

GOD BLESS MY LADIES,
ARE THEY ALL IN LOVE?

[ All Chuckling ]

HERE COMES BOYET!
WHAT ADMITTANCE, LORD?

NAVARRE HAD NOTICE
OF YOUR FAIR APPROACH,

AND HE AND HIS
COMPETITORS IN OATH...

WERE ALL ADDRESSED
TO MEET YOU, GENTLE LADY,
BEFORE I CAME.

MARRY, THUS MUCH
HAVE I LEARNED.

HE RATHER MEANS TO...

LODGE YOU...
IN THE FIELD.

[ Chuckling ]

FAIR PRINCESS, WELCOME
TO THE COURT OF NAVARRE.

"FAIR" I GIVE YOU
BACK AGAIN,

AND WELCOME
I HAVE NOT YET.

THE ROOF OF THIS COURT
IS TOO HIGH TO BE YOURS,

AND WELCOME
TO THE WIDE FIELDS
TOO BASE TO BE MINE.

YOU SHALL BE WELCOME,
MADAM, TO MY COURT.

I WILL BE WELCOME THEN.
CONDUCT ME THITHER.

HEAR ME, DEAR LADY.
I HAVE SWORN AN OATH.

OUR LADY, HELP MY LORD.
HE'LL BE FORSWORN.

NOT FOR THE WORLD,
FAIR MADAM, BY MY WILL.

WHY, WILL SHALL
BREAK IT.

WILL AND NOTHING
ELSE.

YOUR LADYSHIP IS IGNORANT
WHAT IT IS.

WERE MY LORD SO
HIS IGNORANCE WERE WISE.

'TIS DEADLY SIN TO KEEP
THAT OATH, MY LORD,

AND SIN TO BREAK IT.

AHH! BUT PARDON ME.
I AM TOO SUDDEN BOLD...

TO TEACH A TEACHER
ILL BESEEMETH ME.

VOUCHSAFE TO READ
THE PURPOSE OF MY COMING

AND SUDDENLY
RESOLVE ME IN MY SUIT.

MADAM, I WILL,
IF SUDDENLY I MAY.

YOU WILL THE SOONER
THAT I WERE AWAY,

FOR YOU'LL PROVE
PERJURED IF YOU
MAKE ME STAY.

SIR, I PRAY YOU,
A WORD.

WHAT LADY
IS THAT SAME?

THE HEIR OF ALENCON--
MM-HMM.

KATHERINE HER NAME.

A GALLANT LADY!

MONSIEUR, FARE YOU WELL.
IT'S KATHERINE.

AHEM. I BESEECH YOU,
A WORD.

WHAT IS SHE
IN THE GREEN?

A WOMAN SOMETIMES
IF BY DAYLIGHT SHE'S SEEN.

PRAY YOU, SIR,
WHOSE DAUGHTER?

HER MOTHER'S,
I HAVE HEARD.

GOD'S BLESSING ON YOUR BEARD!

GOOD SIR,
BE NOT OFFENDED.

SHE IS AN HEIR
OF FALCONBRIDGE.

NAY.

MY CHOLER IS ENDED.
SHE...

IS A MOST SWEET LADY.

NOT UNLIKE, SIR.
THAT MAY BE.

UM-- WHAT'S HER NAME
IN THE CAP?

ROSALINE, BY GOOD HAP.

IS SHE WEDDED
OR NO?

TO HER WILL, SIR, OR SO.

OH, YOU ARE
WELCOME, SIR.

ADIEU.

FAREWELL TO ME, SIR,
AND WELCOME TO YOU.

MADAM, YOUR FATHER HERE
DOTH INTIMATE THE PAYMENT
OF A 100,000 CROWNS,

BEING BUT THE ONE HALF
OF AN ENTIRE SUM...

DISPERSED BY MY FATHER
IN HIS WARS.

BUT SAY THAT HE OR WE
AS NEITHER HAVE...

RECEIVED THAT SUM,

YET THERE REMAINS UNPAID
A 100,000 MORE.

YOU DO THE KING, MY FATHER,
TOO MUCH WRONG...

AND WRONG THE REPUTATION
OF YOUR NAME...

IN SO UNSEEMING TO CONFESS
RECEIPT OF THAT WHICH HATH
SO FAITHFULLY BEEN PAID.

I DO PROTEST I NEVER HEARD
OF IT, AND IF YOU PROVE IT,

I'LL REPAY IT BACK
OR YIELD UP AQUITANE.

WE ARREST YOUR WORD.
BOYET,

YOU CAN PRODUCE
ACQUITTANCES
FOR SUCH A SUM.

SATISFY ME SO.

[ Boyet ]
SO PLEASE YOUR GRACE,

THE PACKET IS NOT COME

WHERE THAT AND OTHER
SPECIALTIES ARE BOUND.

TOMORROW YOU SHALL HAVE
A SIGHT OF THEM.

IT SHALL SUFFICE ME.

MEANTIME,
RECEIVE SUCH WELCOME...

AT MY HAND AS HONOR...

WITHOUT BREACH OF HONOR
MAY MAKE TENDER OF
TO THY TRUE WORTHINESS.

YOU MAY NOT COME,
FAIR PRINCESS,
WITHIN MY GATES.

BUT HERE WITHOUT,
YOU SHALL BE SO RECEIVED
AS YOU SHALL DEEM YOURSELF...

LODGED IN MY HEART.

TOMORROW SHALL WE
VISIT YOU AGAIN?

DID NOT I DANCE WITH YOU
IN BRABANT ONCE?

DID NOT I DANCE WITH YOU
IN BRABANT ONCE?

I KNOW YOU DID.

HOW NEEDLESS WAS IT THEN
TO AS THE QUESTION?

* I WON'T DANCE
DON'T ASK ME *

* I WON'T DANCE
DON'T ASK ME *

* I WON'T DANCE,
MONSIEUR, WITH YOU *

* MY HEART WON'T LET
MY FEET DO THINGS *

* THEY SHOULD DO

* YOU KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE LOVELY *

* AND SO WHAT
I'M LOVELY *

* BUT OH
WHAT YOU DO TO ME *

* I'M LIKE AN OCEAN WAVE
THAT'S BUMPED ON THE SHORE *

* I FEEL SO ABSOLUTELY
STUMPED ON THE FLOOR *

* WHEN YOU DANCE YOU'RE CHARMING
AND YOU'RE GENTLE *

* ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU
DO THE CONTINENTAL *

* BUT THIS FEELING
ISN'T PURELY MENTAL *

* FOR HEAVEN REST US
I'M NOT ASBESTOS *

* AND THAT'S WHY

[ Women ]
* I WON'T DANCE
WHY SHOULD I *

* I WON'T DANCE
HOW COULD I *

* I WON'T DANCE
MERCI BEAUCOUP *

* I KNOW THAT MUSIC
LEADS THE WAY TO ROMANCE *

* SO IF I HOLD YOU
IN MY ARMS *

* I WON'T DANCE

[ Ladies Giggling ]

[ Boyet ]
IF MY OBSERVATION,
WHICH VERY SELDOM LIES...

BY THE HEART'S STILL RHETORIC
DISCLOSED WITH EYES
DECEIVE ME NOT NOW,

NAVARRE IS INFECTED.

WITH WHAT?

WITH THAT WHICH
WE LOVERS ENTITLE
"AFFECTED."

YOUR REASON?

HIS FACE'S OWN
MARGIN DID QUOTE
SUCH AMAZES...

THAT ALL I SAW HIS EYES
ENCHANTED WITH GAZES.

I'LL GIVE YOU AQUITANE
AND ALL THAT IS HIS...

AND YOU GIVE HIM
FOR MY SAKE
BUT ONE LOVING KISS.

[ All Laughing ]

COME TO OUR PAVILION.
BOYET IS DISPOSED!

BUT TO SPEAK
THAT IN WORDS

WHICH HIS EYE
HATH DISCLOSED.

I ONLY HAVE MADE
A MOUTH OF HIS EYE
BY ADDING A TONGUE,

WHICH I KNOW
WILL NOT LIE.

THOU ART AN OLD LOVE-MONGER,
AND SPEAKEST SKILLFULLY!

DO YOU HEAR,
MY MAD WENCHES?
NO!

WHAT THEN,
DO YOU SEE?
AYE.

OUR WAY TO BE GONE.

YOU ARE
TOO HARD FOR ME.

[ Newsreel Announcer ]
ROYALS CAMPING.

THE PRINCESS OF FRANCE
ENJOYS AN UNEXPECTED TASTE
OF THE OUTDOORS TONIGHT.

ALL WOMEN ARE BANNED
FROM THE COURT OF NAVARRE,

AND HER ROYAL HIGHNESS
IS NO EXCEPTION.

IT MEANS A NIGHT UNDER CANVAS
FOR THE LADIES.

THE KING'S PROCLAMATION
CONTINUES TO MAKE LIFE TRICKY
FOR THE PEOPLE OF NAVARRE.

UH-OH, THERE'S TROUBLE AFOOT.
LOOK AT THIS MOTLEY CREW.

THEY'RE LED
BY THE FANTASTICAL
SPANIARD, DON ARMADO.

HIS HEART MAY BE
IN THE RIGHT PLACE,

BUT HIS LANGUAGE
IS ALL OVER THE PLACE.

LOYALLY HE FOLLOWS THE KING.
IT'S JUST UNFORTUNATE...

THAT WHEN HE SPEAKS,
THE KING CAN'T ALWAYS
FOLLOW ARMADO.

THANK GOODNESS
FOR HIS TRUSTY PAGE,
THE STRANGELY NAMED MOTH.

THESE TWO SEEM TO HAVE BROUGHT
A CRIMINAL TO BOOK.

AND I'LL WAGER
IF THERE'S TROUBLE IN STORE,
THAT RASCAL COSTARD IS INVOLVED.

HE'S THE KING'S
RESIDENT COMEDIAN.

THIS CHEEKY CHAPPIE HAS PLAYED
THE VAUDEVILLE HOUSES
FROM BROADWAY TO BADEN BADEN.

HE'S ALSO BEEN KNOWN TO PLAY
FAST AND LOOSE WITH THE LADIES.
WATCH OUT, GIRLS.

WHATEVER THE PROBLEM,
THE KING CAN ALWAYS RELY
ON HIS LOCAL BOBBY.

CONSTABLE DULL ALWAYS
GETS HIS MAN, OR IN THIS CASE,

SOMETHING RATHER DIFFERENT,
IF THAT PAPER BAG IS HIDING
WHAT WE THINK IT IS.

IN ANY CASE, IT'S ANOTHER
HEADACHE FOR THE KING.

LET THE TRIAL BEGIN.

AHEM.
[ Whistles ]

THE MATTER IS TO ME,
SIR, AS CONCERNING
JAQUENETTA.

[ Honking Sound ]

THE MANNER OF IT IS,
I WAS TAKEN
WITH THE MANNER.

IN WHAT MANNER?

AHH! IN MANNER AND FORM
FOLLOWING, SIR.

I WAS, UH, SEEN WITH HER
IN THE MANOR HOUSE,

SITTING WITH HER
UPON THE FORM,

AND TAKEN FOLLOWING HER
INTO THE PARK,

WHICH, PUT TOGETHER,
IS IN MANNER
AND FORM FOLLOWING.

FROM THE WEST CORNER
OF THY CURIOUS
KNOTTED GARDEN.

THERE DID I SEE
THAT LOW-SPIRITED
SWAIN...

THE BASE MINNOW
OF THY MIRTH,
ME?

THAT UNLETTERED,
SMALL-KNOWING SOUL,
ME?

THAT SHALLOW VESSEL,
STILL ME?

WHICH, AS I REMEMBER,
IS COSTARD!

OH, ME.

SORTED AND CONSORTED,

CONTRARY
TO THY ESTABLISHED

PROCLAIMED EDICT
AND CONTINENT CANON,

WITH-- WITH--

O, WITH BUT WITH
THIS I PASSION TO
SAY WHEREWITH!

WITH A WENCH.

WITH A CHILD OF OUR
GRANDMOTHER EVE--

A FEMALE.

OR, FOR THY MORE
SWEET UNDERSTANDING,

AHH!

A WOMAN!

- OOH!
- [ Groans ]

I, AS MY EVER-ESTEEMED
DUTY PRICKS ME ON,

HAVE BROUGHT TO THEE
TO RECEIVE THE MEED
OF PUNISHMENT...

BY THY GOOD GRACE'S OFFICER
ANTHONY DULL,

A MAN OF GOOD REPUTE,
COURAGE, BEARING
AND ESTIMATION.

O, ME.
I AM DULL.

FOR JAQUENETTA SO...

IS THE WEAKER
VESSEL CALLED
WHICH I APPREHENDED...

WITH THE AFORESAID
SWAIN.

I KEEP HER AS A VESSEL
OF THY LAW'S FURY...

AND SHALL AT THE LEAST
OF THY SWEET NOTICE
BRING HER TO TRIAL.

THINE IN ALL COMPLIMENTS...

OF DEVOTED
AND HEART-BURNING
HEAT OF DUTY...

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO!

SIRRAH, WHAT SAY YOU
TO THIS?

SIR, I-- I--

[ Laughs ]
I--

WHOA!
I CONFESS THE WENCH.

DID YOU HEAR
THE PROCLAMATION?

I DO CONFESS MUCH
OF THE HEARING IT,

BUT LITTLE
OF THE MARKING OF IT.

IT WAS PROCLAIMED
A YEAR'S IMPRISONMENT
TO BE TAKEN WITH A WENCH.

I WAS TAKEN WITH NONE, SIR.
I WAS TAKEN WITH A DAMSEL.

WELL, IT WAS PROCLAIMED DAMSEL.

THIS WAS NO DAMSEL,
NEITHER, SIR.

SHE WAS A VIRGIN.

IT IS SO VARIED TOO, FOR IT
WAS PROCLAIMED A VIRGIN.

IF IT WERE,
I DENY HER VIRGINITY.
I WAS TAKEN WITH A MAID.

THIS MAID WILL NOT
SERVE YOUR TURN, SIR.

THIS MAID WILL SERVE
MY TURN, SIR.

[ Blows Whistle ]

[ Grunts ]

SIR...

I WILL PRONOUNCE
YOUR SENTENCE.

YOU SHALL FAST A WEEK
WITH BRAN AND WATER.

I'D RATHER PRAY
A MONTH WITH MUTTON
AND PORRIDGE.

AND DON ARMADO
SHALL BE YOUR KEEPER.

[ Groans ]

[ Newscaster On Radio ]
AND THE SITUATION IN EUROPE
IS WORSENING,

WITH NEWS OF MOBILIZATION
OF TROOPS ON THE FRENCH BORDER.

REPORTS ARE COMING IN
THAT THE PEACE ACCORD
BETWEEN THE TWO COUNTRIES...

SIGNED LAST MONTH
IS IN DANGER OF COLLAPSE.

MILITARY BUILDUP ON THE FRENCH
NORTHERN BORDERS INDICATE
THAT AN INVASION--

[ Continues, Indistinct ]

[ Ladies Giggling ]

BOY, WHAT SIGN IS IT...

WHEN A MAN OF GREAT SPIRIT
GROWS MELANCHOLY?

A GREAT SIGN, SIR,
THAT HE WILL LOOK SAD.

PRETTY AND APT.

I HAVE PROMISED TO STUDY
THREE YEARS WITH THE KING.

BUT YOU ARE A GENTLEMAN
AND A GAMESTER, SIR.

I CONFESS BOTH.

THEY ARE BOTH THE VARNISH
OF A COMPLETE MAN.

A MOST FINE FIGURE.

[ Groans ]

I WILL HEREUPON
CONFESS...

I AM IN LOVE,

AND AS IT IS BASE
FOR A SOLDIER TO LOVE,

SO AM IN LOVE
WITH A BASE WENCH.

BOY, I DO LOVE
THAT COUNTRY GIRL...

THAT I TOOK IN THE PARK
WITH THE RATIONAL HIND COSTARD.

[ Yelps ]

SING, BOY.
[ Squealing ]

MY SPIRIT
GROWS HEAVY IN LOVE.

* MY STORY IS MUCH TOO SAD
TO BE TOLD *

* BUT PRACTICALLY
EVERYTHING *

* LEAVES ME
TOTALLY COLD *

* THE ONLY EXCEPTION
I KNOW IS THE CASE *

* WHEN I'M OUT
ON A QUIET SPREE *

* FIGHTING VAINLY
THE OLD ENNUI *

* AND I SUDDENLY
TURN AND SEE *

* YOUR FABULOUS FACE

* I GET NO KICK
FROM CHAMPAGNE *

* MERE ALCOHOL
DOESN'T THRILL ME AT ALL *

* SO TELL ME
WHY SHOULD IT BE TRUE *

* THAT I GET A KICK
OUT OF YOU *

* I GET NO KICK
FROM COCAINE *

* I'M SURE THAT IF
I TOOK EVEN ONE SNIFF *

* THAT WOULD BORE ME
TERRIFICALLY TOO *

[ Sneezes ]

* YET I GET
A KICK OUT OF YOU *

[ Yelps ]

* I GET A KICK
EVERY TIME I SEE YOU *

* STANDING THERE
BEFORE ME *

* I GET A KICK
THOUGH IT'S CLEAR TO ME *

[ Grunts ]
OW !

* YOU OBVIOUSLY DON'T
ADORE ME *

* I GET NO KICK
IN A PLANE *

* FLYING TOO HIGH
WITH SOME GIRL
IN THE SKY *

* IT'S MY IDEA
OF NOTHING TO DO *

* YET I GET A KICK

* I'M SURE IT'S A KICK

AAH !

* I GET A KICK
OUT OF YOU *

[ Both ] AAH!

SIR,

THE KING'S PLEASURE
IS THAT YOU KEEP
COSTARD SAFE...

AND YOU MUST SUFFER HIM
TO TAKE NO DELIGHT,

BUT HE MUST FAST...

THREE DAYS A WEEK.

FOR THIS DAMSEL, I MUST
KEEP HER AT THE LODGE.

FARE THEE WELL.
[ Whistles ]

[ Whispers, Indistinct ]

MAID.

MAN.

I WILL VISIT THEE
AT THE LODGE.

THAT'S NEARBY.

I KNOW
WHERE IT IS SITUATED.

LORD, HOW WISE
YOU ARE.

I SHALL TELL THEE
WONDERS.

WITH THAT FACE?

I LOVE THEE.

SO...

I HEARD YOU SAY.

[ Groans ]

[ Cheers ]

[ Squeaks ]

* I WAKE UP EVERY MORNING
WITH A SMILE ON MY FACE *

* EVERYTHING IN ITS PLACE
AS IT SHOULD BE *

* I START OUT EVERY MORNING
JUST AS FREE AS THE BREEZE *

* MY CARES UPON THE SHELF
BECAUSE I FIND MYSELF *

* WITH NO STRINGS
NO CONNECTIONS *

* NO TIES
TO MY AFFECTIONS *

* I'M FANCY FREE AND FREE
FOR ANYTHING FANCY *

* NO DATES
THAT CAN'T BE BROKEN *

* NO WORDS
THAT CAN'T BE SPOKEN *

* ESPECIALLY WHEN I
AM FEELING ROMANCEY *

* LIKE A ROBIN
UPON A TREE *

* LIKE A SAILOR
THAT GOES TO SEA *

* LIKE AN UNWRITTEN MELODY

[ All ]
* I'M FREE, THAT'S ME

* BRING ON
THE BIG ATTRACTION *

* MY DECKS ARE CLEARED
FOR ACTION *

* I'M FANCY FREE AND FREE
FOR ANYTHING FANCY *

* BRING ON
THE BIG ATTRACTION *

* MY DECKS
ARE CLEARED FOR ACTION *

* I'M FANCY FREE AND FREE
FOR ANYTHING FANCY *

[ All Cheering ]

SIRRAH!

COSTARD!
[ Screams ]

[ Muffled Shouting ]

BEAR THIS SIGNIFICANT...

TO THE COUNTRY MAID
JAQUENETTA.

[ Kissing ]

THERE IS...

"REMUNERATHION."

[ Coins Clattering ]

NOW WILL I LOOK
TO HIS "REMUNERATHION."

[ Chuckles ]
"REMUNERATHION."

OH, THAT'S THE LATIN WORD
FOR THREE FARTHINGS.

MY GOOD KNAVE COSTARD--
AAH!

EXCEEDINGLY WELL MET.

OH, PRAY YOU, SIR.

[ High-Pitched Voice ]
HOW MUCH CARNATION RIBBON...

MAY A MAN BUY
FOR A "REMUNERATHION"?

WHAT'S A--
WHAT'S A "REMUNERATHION"?

[ Chuckles ]
MARRY, SIR,
HALF-PENNY FARTHING.

WHY, THEN, THREE FARTHING
WORTH OF SILK.

AH. I THANK YOUR WORSHIP.
GOD BE WITH YOU. MWAH!

STAY, SLAVE,
I MUST EMPLOY THEE.

AS THOU WILT WIN MY FAVOR,
GOOD MY KNAVE, DO ONE THING
FOR ME THAT I SHALL ENTREAT.

WHEN WOULD YOU
HAVE IT DONE, SIR?

THIS AFTERNOON.

WELL, I WILL DO IT,
SIR. FARE YOU WELL.

THOU KNOWEST NOT
WHAT IT IS!

I SHALL KNOW, SIR,
WHEN I HAVE DONE IT.

WHY, VILLAIN,
THOU MUST KNOW FIRST.

I WILL COME
TO YOUR WORSHIP
TOMORROW MORNING.

IT MUST BE DONE
THIS AFTERNOON!
HARK, SLAVE!

IT IS BUT THIS!

I--
IT IS BUT THIS.

THE PRINCESS
COMES TO HUNT HERE
IN THE PARK,

AND IN HER TRAIN
THERE IS A GENTLE LADY.

WHEN TONGUES
SPEAK SWEETLY,

THEN THEY NAME
HER NAME,

AND ROSALINE
THEY CALL HER.

UGH!
ASK FOR HER.

AND TO HER WHITE HAND
SEE THOU DO COMMEND
THIS SEALED-UP COUNSEL.

HMM?
AHEM.

THERE'S THY GUERDON.
GO.

GUERDON!
OH, SWEET GUERDON!

[ High-Pitched Voice ]
BETTER THAN "REMUNERATHION."

[ Normal Voice ]
OH, ELEVEN PENCE
FARTHING BETTER!

[ High-Pitched Voice ]
MOST SWEET GUERDON!

[ Normal Voice ]
I SHALL DO IT, SIR!
IN PRINT!

[ Laughing ]

[ Honking Horn ]

WHOA!
HA HA!

PRAY YOU, WHICH IS
THE, UH, HEAD LADY?

THOU SHALT KNOW HER, FELLOW,
BY THE REST THAT HAVE NO HEADS.

[ Chuckles ]
WHICH IS THE GREATEST LADY,
THE HIGHEST?

THE THICKEST
AND THE TALLEST.

THE THICKEST
AND THE TALLEST.

OH. ARE YOU NOT
THE CHIEF WOMAN?

HMM? YOU ARE
THE THICKEST HERE.
[ Snorts ]

OHH!

WHAT'S YOUR WILL, SIR,
WHAT'S YOUR WILL?

HMM.

I HAVE... A LETTER.
WHOA!

[ Women Gasping ]

A LETTER
FROM MONSIEUR BEROWNE
TO ONE LADY ROSALINE.

[ Gasps ]

BOYET, YOU CAN CARVE.
BREAK UP THIS CAPON.

I AM BOUND TO SERVE.

THIS LETTER IS MISTOOK.

IT IMPORTETH NONE HERE.
IT IS WRIT TO JAQUENETTA.

I DO AFFECT
THE VERY GROUND...

WHICH IS BASE,
WHERE HER SHOE,
WHICH IS BASER,

GUIDED BY HER FOOT
WHICH IS BASEST DOTH TREAD!

[ Whimpering ]

"THINE IN THE DEAREST
DESIGN OF INDUSTRY,

DON ADRIANO DE ARMADO."

[ Chuckling ]

DID YOU EVER
HEAR BETTER?

THOU, FELLOW,
A WORD.

WHO GAVE THEE
THIS LETTER?

[ Cries Out ]
I TOLD YOU, MY LORD!

I--

TO WHOM SHOULDST
THOU GIVE IT?

FROM MY LORD TO MY LADY.

FROM WHICH LORD
TO WHICH LADY?

FROM MY LORD BEROWNE,
A GOOD MASTER OF MINE,

TO A LADY OF FRANCE...

THAT HE CALLED
"ROSALINI"?

[ Sobbing ]

THOU HAST
MISTAKEN HIS LETTER.

COME, FRIENDS, AWAY!

OHH.
GUERDON?

[ Grunts ]

"REMUNERATHION."

WHOO!

THOU MONSTER IGNORANCE,

HOW DEFORMED
DOST THOU LOOK.

[ Man ] MADAM,

HE HATH NEVER FED
OF THE DAINTIES
THAT ARE BRED IN A BOOK.

HE HATH NOT EAT PAPER,
AS IT WERE.

HE HATH NOT DRUNK INK.

HIS INTELLECT
IS NOT REPLENISHED.
HE'S ONLY AN ANIMAL.

[ Both Chuckling ]

[ Clucks ]

ONLY SENSIBLE IN THE...

DULLER PARTS.

AND SUCH BARREN PLANTS
ARE SET BEFORE US...

THAT WE THANKFUL SHOULD BE,
WHICH WE OF TASTE
AND FEELING ARE,

FOR THOSE PARTS
THAT DO FRUCTIFY...

IN US MORE THAN HE.

GOOD MASTER PARSON,

BE SO GOOD AS TO
READ ME THIS LETTER.

IT WAS GIVEN ME
BY COSTARD AND SENT TO ME
FROM DON ARMADO.

I BESEECH YOU,
READ IT.

WHAT ARE THE CONTENTS?

WHAT, MY SOUL?

VERSES?

[ Sighs ]

AY, MADAM.
AND VERY LEARNED.

LET ME HEAR A STAFF,

A STANZA, A VERSE.

* SOMEDAY

* WHEN I'M AWFULLY LOW

* WHEN THE WORLD IS COLD

* I WILL FEEL A GLOW
JUST THINKING OF YOU *

* AND THE WAY
YOU LOOK TONIGHT *

* OH, BUT YOU'RE LOVELY

* WITH YOUR SMILE SO WARM

* AND YOUR CHEEK SO SOFT

* THERE IS NOTHING FOR ME
BUT TO LOVE YOU *

* JUST THE WAY
YOU LOOK TONIGHT *

* WITH EACH WORD
YOUR TENDERNESS GROWS *

* TEARING MY FEAR APART

* AND THAT LAUGH
THAT WRINKLES YOUR NOSE *

* TOUCHES MY FOOLISH HEART

* LOVELY

* NEVER, NEVER CHANGE

* KEEP THAT
BREATHLESS CHARM *

* WON'T YOU PLEASE
ARRANGE IT *

* 'CAUSE I LOVE YOU

* JUST THE WAY
YOU LOOK TONIGHT *

* JUST THE WAY
YOU LOOK *

* TONIGHT

A RARE TALENT.

THIS IS A GIFT
THAT I HAVE.

SIMPLE, SIMPLE.
A FOOLISH, EXTRAVAGANT SPIRIT...

FULL OF FORMS, FIGURES,
SHAPES, OBJECTS, IDEAS,

APPREHENSIONS,
MOTIONS, REVOLUTIONS.

THESE ARE BEGOT
IN THE VENTRICLE OF MEMORY,

NOURISHED IN THE WOMB
OF PIA MATER,

AND DELIVERED UPON
THE MELLOWING OF OCCASION.

BUT THE GIFT IS GOOD
IN THOSE IN WHOM
IT IS ACUTE,

AND I AM
THANKFUL FOR IT.

MADAM, I PRAISE
THE LORD FOR YOU,

AND SO MAY
MY PARISHIONERS.

FOR THEIR DAUGHTERS ARE
WELL TUTORED BY YOU...

MMM.

AND THEIR SONS PROFIT
VERY GREATLY UNDER YOU.

BUT DOMICELLA,

VIRGIN, WAS THIS
DIRECTED TO YOU?

AYE, MADAM.

I WILL OVERGLANCE
THE SUPERSCRIPT.

"TO THE SNOW-WHITE HAND
OF THE MOST BEAUTEOUS
LADY... ROSALINE."

I WILL LOOK AGAIN
ON THE INTELLECT
OF THE LETTER...

FOR THE NOMINATION
OF THE PARTY WRITING
TO THE PERSON WRITTEN UNTO.

"YOUR LADYSHIP'S IN ALL
DESIRED EMPLOYMENT, BEROWNE."

SIR NATHANIEL,

THIS BEROWNE IS ONE OF
THE VOTARIES WITH THE KING,

AND HERE HE HATH
FRAMED A LETTER...

TO A SEQUENT
OF THE STRANGER PRINCESS,

WHICH, ACCIDENTALLY
OR BY WAY OF PROGRESSION...

HATH MISCARRIED.

TRIP AND GO,
MY SWEET.

DELIVER THIS PAPER
INTO THE ROYAL HAND
OF THE KING.

IT MAY CONCERN MUCH!

HAVE WITH THEE,
MY GIRL!

MADAM, YOU HAVE DONE THIS
IN THE FEAR OF GOD...

VERY RELIGIOUSLY.

BUT TO RETURN TO THE--
* VERSES

DID THEY PLEASE YOU,
SIR NATHANIEL?

MARVELOUS WELL.

HMM.

* [ Sings Melody ]

* [ Continues Singing ]

I BESEECH YOUR...
SOCIETY.

AND THANK YOU TOO,
FOR SOCIETY,

SAITH THE TEXT,
IS THE HAPPINESS OF LIFE.

[ Berowne ]
BY THE LORD,

THIS LOVE
IS AS MAD AS...

AJAX.

[ Bleating ]

[ Bleating ]

IT KILLS SHEEP.

KILLS ME.
I A SHEEP!

HMPH.
I WILL NOT LOVE.

IF I DO, HANG ME.
I' FAITH, I WILL NOT.

OH, BUT HER EYE!

BY THIS LIGHT,

BUT FOR HER EYE
I WOULD NOT LOVE HER.

YES, FOR HER
TWO EYES.

WELL, I DID NOTHING
IN THE WORLD BUT LIE,
AND LIE IN MY THROAT.

BY HEAVEN, I DO LOVE,
AND IT HATH TAUGHT ME
TO RHYME...

AND TO BE MELANCHOLY
AND HERE IS PART
OF MY RHYME...

AND HERE
MY MELANCHOLY.

WELL, SHE HATH
ONE OF MY SONNETS ALREADY.

THE CLOWN BORE IT,
THE FOOL SENT IT
AND THE LADY HATH IT.

SWEET CLOWN, SWEETER FOOL,

SWEETEST LADY.

BY THE WORLD,
I WOULD NOT CARE A PIN
IF THE OTHER THREE WERE IN.

[ Door Opening ]

[ Berowne ]
WHOA!

[ Muffled Shout ]

[ Crash ]

[ Whimpers ]

WHOO-HOO-HOO!

* HOW GLAD
THE MANY MILLIONS *

* OF ANABELS AND LILLIANS
WOULD BE *

MMM.

* TO CAPTURE ME

* BUT YOU
WITH YOUR PERSISTENCE *

* YOU WORE DOWN
MY RESISTANCE *

* I FELL

* AND IT WAS SWELL

* I'M YOUR BIG AND BRAVE
AND HANDSOME ROMEO *

* HOW YOU WON ME

* I SHALL NEVER, NEVER

[ Mouths Word ]

* KNOW
[ Chuckles ]

NOW IN THY LIKENESS
ONE MORE FOOL APPEAR.

* IT'S NOT
THAT YOU'RE ATTRACTIVE *

* BUT OOH, MY HEART
GREW ACTIVE *

* WHEN YOU CAME INTO VIEW

[ Door Opening ]

* I'VE GOT
A CRUSH ON YOU *

* SWEETIE PIE

* ALL THE DAY
AND NIGHTTIME *

* HEAR ME SIGH

* I NEVER HAD
THE LEAST NOTION *

* THAT I COULD FALL WITH

* SO MUCH EMOTION

* COULD YOU COO

* COULD YOU CARE

* FOR A COUNTRY COTTAGE

* WE COULD SHARE

* THE WORLD WILL
PARDON MY MUSH *

* 'CAUSE I'VE GOT A CRUSH
MY BABY ON YOU *

* THE WORLD
WILL PARDON MY MUSH *

* 'CAUSE I'VE GOT A CRUSH
MY BABY *

* MY BABY

* A CRUSH, MY BABY
ON YOU *

[ Both Scream ]

DUMAINE!

THY LOVE IS
FAR FROM CHARITY.

YOU MAY LOOK PALE,
BUT I SHOULD BLUSH, HUH?

[ Chuckles ]

[ Taunting ]
I KNOW.

TO BE O'ERHEARD
AND TAKEN NAPPING SO.

COME, SIR!
YOU BLUSH!

AS HIS, YOUR CASE IS SUCH.

YOU CHIDE AT HIM,
OFFENDING TWICE AS MUCH.

I HAVE BEEN CLOSELY
SHROUDED IN THIS BUSH!

AND MARKED YOU BOTH,
AND FOR YOU BOTH DID BLUSH.

I HEARD YOUR
GUILTY RHYMES,

OBSERVED YOUR FASHION,
SAW SIGHS REEK FROM YOU,

NOTED WELL
YOUR PASSION.

WHAT WILL BEROWNE SAY...

WHEN THAT HE SHALL HEAR
FAITH SO INFRINGED...

WHICH SUCH ZEAL
DID SWEAR?

HOW WILL HE SCORN?
HOW WILL HE SPEND HIS WIT?

HOW WILL HE TRIUMPH,
LEAP AND LAUGH AT IT?

FOR ALL THE WEALTH
THAT EVER I DID SEE,

I WOULD NOT HAVE HIM KNOW
SO MUCH BY ME.

AH !
GOOD, MY LIEGE.

I PRAY THEE PARDON ME!

[ Shouting ]

[ Groaning ]

GOOD HEART,
WHAT GRACE HAST THOU
THUS TO REPROVE...

THESE WORMS FOR LOVING
THAT ART MOST IN LOVE?

ARE WE BETRAYED THUS
TO THY OVERVIEW?

NOT YOU TO ME,

BUT I...
BETRAYED BY YOU.

I THAT AM...
HONEST,

I THAT HOLD IT SIN...

TO BREAK THE VOW...

I AM ENGAGED IN.

I AM BETRAYED
BY KEEPING COMPANY...

WITH MEN LIKE YOU,

MEN OF INCONSTANCY.

WHEN SHALL YOU SEE ME
WRITE A THING IN RHYME...

OR GROAN FOR JOAN?

WHEN SHALL YOU HEAR
THAT I...

WILL PRAISE A HAND,

A FOOT, A FACE,
AN EYE,

A GAIT, A STATE,

A BROW, A BREAST,

A WAIST, A LEG,
A LIMB?

SOFT, WHITHER AWAY
SO FAST?

GOD BLESS THE KING!

[ King ] WHAT PRESENT
HAST THOU THERE?

SOME CERTAIN TREASON.

WHAT MAKES TREASON HERE?

I BESEECH YOUR GRACE,
LET THIS LETTER BE READ.

OUR PARSON MISDOUBTS IT.
'TWAS TREASON, HE SAID.

BEROWNE?

[ Nervous Chuckle ]

[ King ]
READ IT OVER.

WHERE HADST THOU IT?

OF COSTARD!

[ King ]
WHERE HADST THOU IT?

OF DUN ADRAMA,
DUN ADRAMA--

DON ARBNAR--
CARBONARA-- THE DON.

[ Whimpering ]

HOW NOW, WHAT IS IN YOU?
WHY DOST THOU TEAR IT?

A TOY, MY LIEGE, A TOY.
YOUR GRACE NEED NOT FEAR IT.

IT DID MOVE HIM
TO PASSION,

AND THEREFORE
LET'S HEAR IT!

[ Grunting ]

IT IS BEROWNE'S WRITING.

[ Grunts ]

AND HERE IS HIS NAME!
AAH!

YOU WHORESON LOGGERHEAD,
YOU WERE BORN TO DO
ME SHAME!

GUILTY, MY LORD,
GUILTY!

I CONFESS. I CONFESS.

WHAT?

THAT YOU THREE FOOLS LACKED
ME TO MAKE UP THE MESS.

HE, HE AND YOU,
E'EN YOU, MY LIEGE AND I...

ARE PICKPURSES IN LOVE
AND WE DESERVE TO DIE.

[ Laughs ]

OH, DISMISS THIS AUDIENCE
AND I SHALL TELL YOU MORE.

NOW THE NUMBER IS EVEN.

TRUE, TRUE.
WE ARE FOUR.

WILL THESE TURTLES
BE GONE?

HENCE. SIRS, AWAY.

WALK ASIDE THE TRUE FOLK
AND LET THE TRAITORS STAY.

[ Giggles ]

[ Rhythmic Foot Tapping ]

[ Rhythmic Foot Tapping ]

HAVE AT YOU THEN
AFFECTION'S MEN-AT-ARMS.

CONSIDER WHAT YOU FIRST
DID SWEAR UNTO.

TO FAST.
TO STUDY.

AND TO SEE NO WOMAN.

FLAT TREASON 'GAINST
THE KINGLY STATE OF YOUTH.

SAY, CAN YOU FAST?

YOUR STOMACHS
ARE TOO YOUNG...

AND ABSTINENCE
ENGENDERS MALADIES.

FOR WHEN WOULD YOU,
MY LIEGE, OR YOU, OR YOU,

HAVE FOUND THE GROUND
OF STUDY'S EXCELLENCE?

WITHOUT THE BEAUTY
OF A WOMAN'S FACE,

FROM WOMAN'S EYES
THIS DOCTRINE I DERIVE.

THEY ARE THE GROUND,

THE BOOKS, THE ACADEMES...

FROM WHENCE DOTH SPRING
THE TRUE PROMETHEAN FIRE.

O WE HAVE MADE A VOW
TO STUDY, LORDS,

AND IN THAT VOW,
WE HAVE FORSWORN OUR BOOKS.

FOR WHEN WOULD YOU,
MY LIEGE, OR YOU, OR YOU,

IN LEADEN CONTEMPLATION
HAVE FOUND OUT...

SUCH FIERY NUMBERS
AS THE PROMPTING EYES...

OF BEAUTY'S TUTORS
HAVE ENRICHED YOU WITH.

OTHER SLOW ARTS
ENTIRELY KEEP THE BRAIN,

AND THEREFORE FINDING
BARREN PRACTICERS...

SCARCE SHOW A HARVEST
OF THEIR HEAVY TOIL.

BUT LOVE,

FIRST LEARNED
IN A LADY'S EYES,

LIVES NOT ALONE
IMMURED IN THE BRAIN,

BUT WITH THE MOTION
OF ALL ELEMENTS.

COURSES AS SWIFT AS THOUGHT
IN EVERY POWER,

AND GIVES TO EVERY POWER
A DOUBLE POWER...

ABOVE THEIR FUNCTIONS
AND THEIR OFFICES.

IT ADDS A PRECIOUS SEEING
TO THE EYE.

A LOVER'S EYES WILL GAZE
AN EAGLE BLIND.

A LOVER'S EAR WILL HEAR
THE LOWEST SOUND.

LOVE'S FEELING
IS MORE SOFT AND SENSIBLE...

THAN ARE THE TENDER HORNS
OF COCKLED SNAILS.

LOVE'S TONGUE PROVES DAINTY
BACCHUS GROSS IN TASTE.

FOR VALOUR
IS NOT LOVE A HERCULES,

STILL CLIMBING TREES
IN THE HESPERIDES.

SUBTLE AS SPHINX,

AS SWEET AND MUSICAL,

AS BRIGHT APOLLO'S LUTE
STRUNG WITH HIS HAIR.

AND WHEN LOVE SPEAKS,

THE VOICE
OF ALL THE GODS...

MAKE HEAVEN DROWSY
WITH THE HARMONY.

* HEAVEN
I'M IN HEAVEN *

* AND MY HEART BEATS SO

* THAT I CAN HARDLY SPEAK

* AND I SEEM TO FIND

* THE HAPPINESS I SEEK

* WHEN WE'RE OUT TOGETHER

* DANCING CHEEK TO CHEEK

* HEAVEN

* I'M IN HEAVEN

* AND THE CARES
THAT HANG AROUND ME
THROUGH THE WEEK *

* SEEM TO VANISH LIKE
A GAMBLER'S LUCKY STREAK *

* WHEN WE'RE OUT TOGETHER
DANCING CHEEK TO CHEEK *

* [ Instrumental Continues ]

* DANCE WITH ME

* I WANT MY ARM ABOUT YOU

* AND THE CHARM ABOUT YOU

* WILL CARRY ME THROUGH

* TO HEAVEN

* I'M IN HEAVEN

* AND MY HEART BEATS SO
THAT I CAN HARDLY SPEAK *

* AND I SEEM TO FIND
THE HAPPINESS I SEEK *

* WHEN WE'RE OUT TOGETHER
DANCING CHEEK TO CHEEK *

* HEAVEN

[ Men ]
* I'M IN HEAVEN

* AND MY HEART BEATS SO
THAT I CAN HARDLY SPEAK *

* AND I SEEM TO FIND
THE HAPPINESS I SEEK *

* WHEN WE'RE OUT TOGETHER
DANCING CHEEK TO CHEEK *

SHALL WE... RESOLVE TO WOO
THESE GIRLS OF FRANCE?

AND WIN THEM TOO?

THEREFORE, LET US DEVISE
SOME ENTERTAINMENT FOR THEM
IN THEIR TENTS.

FIRST, FROM THE PARK,
LET US CONDUCT THEM THITHER.

THEN, HOMEWARD, EVERY MAN
ATTACH THE HAND
OF HIS FAIR MISTRESS.

IN THE AFTERNOON,
WE WILL WITH SOME STRANGE
PASTIME, SOLACE THEM,

SUCH AS THE SHORTNESS
OF THE TIME CAN SHAPE.

FOR REVELS, DANCES,
MASQUES AND MERRY HOURS...

FORERUN FAIR LOVE,
STREWING HER WAY
WITH FLOWERS.

AWAY, AWAY! NO TIME
SHALL BE OMITTED...

THAT WILL BE TIME
AND MAY BY US BE FITTED.

YES!

[ Newsreader ]
WHILE THE REST OF EUROPE BRACES
ITSELF FOR IMMINENT CATASTROPHE,

HERE IN NAVARRE,
ALL SEEMS QUIET.

RUMORS ABOUND THAT THE KING'S
OATH MAY HAVE BEEN BROKEN BY
MORE THAN A FEW OF THE NATIVES.

NOT MUCH EVIDENCE OF STUDY,
THAT'S FOR SURE.

HELLO?
WHAT'S HE UP TO?

DISCUSSING WHAT TO DO
IN THE BLACKOUT, PERHAPS?

AND WHAT ABOUT
THESE MYSTERY GIFTS?

THE PRINCESS AND HER LADIES
SEEM TO HAVE HAD A VISIT
FROM THE POSTMAN.

LOVE LETTERS?
SURELY THE KING'S MEN
CAN'T BE INVOLVED.

RUMORS TOO
OF A GALA ENTERTAINMENT
FOR THIS VERY EVENING.

WAS SINGING AND DANCING
INCLUDED IN THE OATH?

I DON'T THINK SO.
BUT IF THE KING PLANS A PARTY,
THEN EVERYONE MUST FOLLOW.

AND WHO BETTER TO ARRANGE
AN EXOTIC NIGHT...

THAN AN EXOTIC KNIGHT,
ARMADO'S YOUR MAN.

AND WITH THE HELPFUL HAND
OF HOLOFERNIA...

HEAVING THE HURRAHS
INTO A HEAVEN OF HYSTERICAL FUN,

WHO KNOWS WHAT THESE REVELLERS
WILL DREAM UP ?

[ Quiet Applause ]
AHH!

- [ Woman ] BRAVO!
- SWEETHEARTS,

WE SHALL BE RICH
ERE WE DEPART.

LOOK YOU WHAT I HAVE
FROM THE LOVING KING.

BUT, ROSALINE,
YOU HAVE A FAVOR TOO.

WHO SENT IT?
AND WHAT IS IT?

NAY, I HAVE VERSES TOO.
I THANK BEROWNE.

O HE HATH DRAWN
MY PICTURE IN HIS LETTER.

ANYTHING LIKE?
[ All ] OH!

BUT, KATHERINE,
WHAT WAS SENT TO YOU
FROM FAIR DUMAINE?

MADAM, THIS GLOVE.

THIS AND THESE PEARLS
TO ME SENT LONGAVILLE.

OH, WE ARE WISE GIRLS
TO MOCK OUR LOVERS SO.

THEY ARE WORSE FOOLS
TO PURCHASE MOCKING SO.

HERE COMES BOYET,
AND MIRTH IS IN HIS FACE.

ARM, WENCHES, ARM.
ENCOUNTERS MOUNTED
ARE AGAINST YOUR PEACE.

LOVE DOTH APPROACH DISGUISED,
ARMED IN ARGUMENTS.

OH, YOU'LL BE SURPRISED.

UNDER THE COOL SHADE
OF A SYCAMORE,

I THOUGHT TO CLOSE MINE EYES
SOME HALF AN HOUR,

WHEN LO, TO INTERRUPT
MY PURPOSED REST,

TOWARD THAT SHADE
I MIGHT BEHOLD
ADDRESSED THE KING...

[ Women Squeal ]
AND HIS COMPANIONS.

WARILY, I STOLE INTO
A NEIGHBOR THICKET BY...

AND OVERHEARD
WHAT YOU SHALL OVERHEAR,

THAT BY AND BY DISGUISED,
THEY WILL BE HERE.

[ Shrieks ]

THEIR HERALD IS
A PRETTY KNAVISH PAGE.

BUT WHAT-- BUT WHAT
COME THEY TO VISIT US?

THEY DO. THEY DO.
AND ARE APPARELLED THUS,

LIKE, MASKED DELIGHTS
OR REVELLERS,
AS I GUESS.

THEIR PURPOSE IS TO PARLEY,
COURT AND DANCE.

AND EVERY ONE
HIS LOVE-SUIT WILL ADVANCE
UNTO HIS SEVERAL MISTRESS,

WHICH THEY'LL KNOW
BY FAVORS SEVERAL,
WHICH THEY DID BESTOW.

AND WILL THEY SO?
THE GALLANTS
SHALL BE TASKED.

FOR, LADIES, WE WILL
EVERY ONE BE MASKED.

AND NOT A MAN OF THEM
SHALL HAVE THE GRACE,

DESPITE OF SUIT,
TO SEE A LADY'S FACE.

HOLD, TAKE THOU THIS,
MY SWEET, AND GIVE ME THINE.

SO SHALL BEROWNE
TAKE ME FOR ROSALINE.

AND YOU CHANGE
YOUR FAVORS TOO...

SO SHALL YOUR LOVES
WOO CONTRARY, DECEIVED
BY THESE REMOVES.

COME ON, THEN.
WEAR THE FAVORS
MOST IN SIGHT.

BUT IN THIS CHANGING,
WHAT IS YOUR INTENT?

THE EFFECT OF MY INTENT
IS TO CROSS THEIRS.

THEY DO IT
BUT IN MOCKERY-MERRIMENT,

AND MOCK FOR MOCK
IS ONLY MY INTENT.

* [ Piano ]

THE TONGUES OF MOCKING WENCHES
ARE AS KEEN AS IS
THE RAZOR'S EDGE INVISIBLE,

CUTTING A SMALLER HAIR
THAN MAY BE SEEN.

[ Boyet ]
BY CHANGING PARTNERS
FOR THE MASQUERADE,

THEY'LL UNDERMINE
THE GENTLEMEN'S CHARADE.

[ Rosaline ]
* THERE MAY BE
TROUBLE AHEAD *

* BUT WHILE THERE'S
MOONLIGHT AND MUSIC
AND LOVE AND ROMANCE *

* LET'S FACE THE MUSIC
AND DANCE *

* BEFORE THE FIDDLERS
HAVE FLED *

* BEFORE THEY ASK US
TO PAY THE BILL *

* AND WHILE WE STILL
HAVE THE CHANCE *

* LET'S FACE THE MUSIC
AND DANCE *

* SOON WE'LL BE
WITHOUT THE MOON *

* HUMMING A DIFFERENT TUNE
AND THEN *

* THERE MAY BE TEARDROPS
TO SHED *

* SO WHILE THERE'S
MOONLIGHT AND MUSIC
AND LOVE AND ROMANCE *

* LET'S FACE THE MUSIC
AND DANCE, DANCE *

* LET'S FACE THE MUSIC
AND DANCE *

* [ Instrumental Continues ]

* SOON WE'LL BE
WITHOUT THE MOON *

* HUMMING A DIFFERENT TUNE
AND THEN *

* THERE MAY BE TEARDROPS
TO SHED *

* SO WHILE THERE'S
MOONLIGHT AND MUSIC
AND LOVE AND ROMANCE *

* LET'S FACE THE MUSIC
AND DANCE, DANCE *

* LET'S FACE THE MUSIC
AND DANCE *

ARE THESE THE BREED OF WITS
SO WONDERED AT ?

BUT WILL YOU HEAR?
THE KING IS MY LOVE SWORN.

AND QUICK BEROWNE HATH
PLIGHTED FAITH TO ME.

AND LONGAVILLE WAS
FOR MY SERVICE BORN.

DUMAINE IS MINE,
AS SURE AS BARK ON TREE.

MADAM AND PRETTY MISTRESSES,
GIVE EAR.

IMMEDIATELY THEY WILL AGAIN
BE HERE IN THEIR OWN SHAPES.

FOR IT CAN NEVER BE,
THEY WILL DIGEST
THIS HARSH INDIGNITY.

WILL THEY RETURN?

O THEY WILL, THEY WILL.
GOD KNOWS.

AVAUNT, PERPLEXITY.

WHAT SHALL WE DO
IF THEY RETURN IN THEIR
OWN SHAPES TO WOO?

GOOD, MADAM, IF BY ME
YOU'LL BE ADVISED.

LET'S MOCK THEM STILL,
AS WELL KNOWN AS DISGUISED.

LET US COMPLAIN TO THEM
WHAT FOOLS WERE HERE.

LADIES, WITHDRAW.
THE GALLANTS ARE AT HAND.

[ Women Scream ]

[ Chattering ]
* [ Piano ]

FAIR, SIR,
GOD SAVE YOU.

WHERE'S THE--
WHERE'S THE PRINCESS?

GONE, TO HER TENT.

AH.
PLEASE IT, YOUR MAJESTY,

COMMAND ME ANY SERVICE
TO HER THITHER.

THAT SHE VOUCHSAFE ME
AUDIENCE FOR ONE WORD.

I WILL
AND SO WILL SHE.

I KNOW, MY LORD.

[ All Giggling ]

WE CAME TO VISIT YOU
AND PURPOSE NOW
TO LEAD YOU TO OUR COURT.

- VOUCHSAFE IT, THEN.
- NOW BY MY MAIDEN HONOR,

YET AS PURE
AS THE UNSULLIED LILY,

I PROTEST A WORLD OF TORMENTS
THOUGH I SHOULD ENDURE.

I WOULD NOT YIELD
TO BE YOUR HOUSE'S GUEST.

SO MUCH I HATE A BREAKING CAUSE
TO BE OF HEAVENLY OATHS,
VOWED WITH INTEGRITY.

OH.

YOU HAVE LIVED
IN DESOLATION HERE.

UNSEEN, UNVISITED,
MUCH TO OUR SHAME.

NOT SO, MY LORD.
IT IS NOT SO, I SWEAR.

WE HAVE HAD PASTIMES HERE
AND PLEASANT GAME.

HOW, MADAM?

IN TRUTH, MY LORD.

TRIM GALLANTS,
FULL OF COURTSHIP
AND OF STATE.

MADAM SPEAK TRUE.

HERE THEY STAYED AN HOUR
AND TALKED APACE.

AND IN THAT HOUR, MY LORD,
THEY DID NOT BLESS US
WITH ONE HAPPY WORD.

- WHICH OF THE VISORS
WAS IT THAT YOU WORE?
- WHERE?

WHEN?
WHAT VISORS?

WHY DEMAND YOU THIS?

THERE, THEN, THAT VISOR,
THAT SUPERFLUOUS CASE,

THAT HID THE WORSE
AND SHOWED THE BETTER FACE.

WE WERE DESCRIED.
THEY'LL MOCK US NOW.
DOWNRIGHT.

LET US CONFESS
AND TURN IT TO A JEST.

AMAZED, MY LORD?

WHY LOOKS
YOUR HIGHNESS SAD?

WHY LOOK YOU PALE?

I SEE THE TRICK.
HERE WAS A CONSENT.

KNOWING AFOREHAND
OF OUR MERRIMENT,

TO DASH IT LIKE
A CHRISTMAS COMEDY.

SOME CARRY-TALE,
SOME PLEASE-MAN,

SOME SLIGHT ZANY,

SOME MUMBLE-NEWS,
SOME TRENCHER-KNIGHT,
SOME DICK.

[ Women Giggling ]

THAT SMILES HIS CHEEK
IN YEARS AND KNOWS THE TRICK...

TO MAKE MY LADY LAUGH
WHEN SHE'S DISPOSED...

TOLD OUR INTENTS BEFORE,
WHICH ONCE DISCLOSED,

THE LADIES
DID CHANGE FAVORS.

AND THEN WE,
FOLLOWING THE SIGNS,
WOOED BUT THE SIGN OF SHE.

[ Man ]
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
IN HONOR OF HER ROYAL HIGHNESS,

COSTARD AND THE PEOPLE
OF NAVARRE WILL GIVE A SPECIAL
PERFORMANCE IN ONE MINUTE.

ONE MINUTE.

BEROWNE, THEY WILL SHAME US.
LET THEM NOT APPROACH.

WE ARE SHAME-PROOF,
MY LORD.

AND 'TIS SOME POLICY
TO HAVE ONE SHOW WORSE THAN
THE KING'S AND HIS COMPANY.

[ Newsreader ] WELL, IT'S NOT
THE FIRST TIME THE LADIES

HAVE TURNED THE TABLES
ON THE BOYS,

BUT THEIR CUNNING PLAN
TO CHANGE MASKS,
CHANGE PARTNERS AND DANCE...

MADE THOSE RED-FACED BOYS
REALLY FACE THE MUSIC.

BUT ALL IS FORGIVEN
AS OATHS ARE FORGOTTEN,
AND IT'S SHOW TIME.

"THE PAGEANT
OF THE NINE WORTHIES"
IS GIVEN A ROUSING TREATMENT...

BY THE PEOPLE OF NAVARRE.

IT'S HIGH JINKS ALL ROUND.
WHOOPS ! CAREFUL, SIR.
HMM, BET THAT HURT.

MASKS AND FACES
MAKE THIS MERRY CROWD...

FORGET THE GRIM EVENTS
OF THE OUTSIDE WORLD.

HEY, LOOK OUT, JOHNNY.

NO MORE STUDY FOR THESE MEN.

THEY'RE IN THE LOVE BUSINESS,
AND THERE'S NO BUSINESS LIKE IT.

BUT PERHAPS SOME MIGHT
JUST DISAGREE.

[ Cheering, Applause ]

* [ Orchestral ]

* THE BUTCHER, THE BAKER
THE GROCER, THE CLERK *

* ARE SECRETLY
UNHAPPY MEN BECAUSE *

* THE BUTCHER, THE BAKER
THE GROCER, THE CLERK *

* GET PAID FOR WHAT THEY DO
BUT NO APPLAUSE *

* THEY'D GLADLY BID
THEIR DREARY JOBS GOOD-BYE *

* FOR ANYTHING THEATRICAL

* AND WHY

* THERE'S NO BUSINESS

* LIKE SHOW BUSINESS

* LIKE NO BUSINESS

* I KNOW

* EVERYTHING ABOUT IT
IS APPEALING *

* EVERYTHING THE TRAFFIC
WILL ALLOW *

* NOWHERE COULD YOU GET
THAT HAPPY FEELING *

* WHEN YOU ARE STEALING

* THAT EXTRA BOW

* THERE'S NO PEOPLE
LIKE SHOW PEOPLE *

* THEY SMILE
WHEN THEY ARE LOW *

* EVEN WITH A TURKEY
THAT YOU KNOW WILL FOLD *

* YOU MAY BE STRANDED
OUT IN THE COLD *

* STILL YOU WOULDN'T CHANGE IT
FOR A SACK OF GOLD *

* LET'S GO ON
WITH THE SHOW *

* LET'S GO ON
WITH THE SHOW *

* THERE'S NO BUSINESS
LIKE SHOW BUSINESS *

* LIKE NO BUSINESS I KNOW

* EVERYTHING ABOUT IT
IS APPEALING *

* EVERYTHING THE TRAFFIC
WILL ALLOW *

* NOWHERE COULD YOU GET
THAT HAPPY FEELING *

* WHEN YOU ARE STEALING
THAT EXTRA BOW *

* THERE'S NO PEOPLE
LIKE SHOW PEOPLE *

* THEY SMILE
WHEN THEY ARE LOW *

* EVEN WITH A TURKEY
THAT YOU KNOW WILL FOLD *

* YOU MAY BE STRANDED
OUT IN THE COLD *

* STILL YOU WOULDN'T CHANGE IT
FOR A SACK OF GOLD *

* LET'S GO ON
WITH THE SHOW *

* THERE'S NO BUSINESS
LIKE SHOW BUSINESS *

* IF YOU TELL ME IT'S SO

* YOU GET WORD BEFORE
THE SHOW HAS STARTED *

* THAT YOUR FAVORITE UNCLE
DIED AT DAWN *

* TOP OF THAT
YOUR MA AND PA HAVE PARTED *

NO, MAMA, PAPA!
MAMA, PAPA!

* YOU'RE BROKENHEARTED
[ Inhales Deeply ]

* BUT YOU GO ON

* THERE'S NO PEOPLE
LIKE SHOW PEOPLE *

* THEY SMILE
WHEN THEY ARE LOW *

* YESTERDAY THEY TOLD YOU
YOU WOULD NOT GO FAR *

* THAT NIGHT YOU OPEN
AND THERE YOU ARE *

* NEXT DAY ON YOUR DRESSING ROOM
THEY'VE HUNG A STAR *

* LET'S GO ON
WITH THE SHOW *

* LET'S GO ON WITH THE

* SHOW

[ Applause, Cheering ]

[ Footsteps ]

GOD SAVE YOU, MADAM.

WELCOME, MERCADE.

BUT THAT THOU INTERRUPT'ST
OUR MERRIMENT.

I AM SORRY, MADAM,

FOR THE NEWS I BRING
IS HEAVY IN MY TONGUE.

THE KING, YOUR FATHER.

DEAD.

FOR MY LIFE.

EVEN SO.

MY TALE IS TOLD.

WORTHIES, AWAY.

THE SCENE
BEGINS TO CLOUD.

HOW FARES YOUR MAJESTY?

BOYET, PREPARE.
I WILL AWAY TONIGHT.

MADAM, NOT SO.
I DO BESEECH YOU STAY.

PREPARE, I SAY.

THANK YOU, GRACIOUS LORDS,
FOR ALL YOUR FAIR ENDEAVORS...

AND ENTREAT
OUT OF A NEW SAD SOUL...

THAT YOU VOUCHSAFE
IN YOUR RICH WISDOM...

TO EXCUSE OR HIDE
THE LIBERAL OPPOSITION
OF OUR SPIRITS.

IF OVERBOLDLY
WE HAVE BORNE OURSELVES
IN THE CONVERSE OF BREATH,

YOUR GENTLENESS
WAS GUILTY OF IT.

FAREWELL, WORTHY LORD.
A HEAVY HEART BEARS NOT
A NIMBLE TONGUE.

EXCUSE ME SO COMING
TOO SHORT OF THANKS...

FOR YOUR GREAT SUIT
SO EASILY OBTAINED.

THE EXTREME PARTS OF TIME
EXTREMELY FORMS ALL CAUSES
TO THE PURPOSE OF HIS SPEED.

AND OFTEN AT HIS VERY LOOSE
DECIDES THAT WHICH LONG PROCESS
COULD NOT ARBITRATE.

AND THOUGH THE MOURNING BROW
OF PROGENY FORBID
THE SMILING COURTESY OF LOVE,

THE HOLY SUIT WHICH FAIN IT
WOULD CONVINCE.

YET, SINCE LOVE'S ARGUMENT
WAS FIRST ON FOOT,

LET NOT THE CLOUD
OF SORROW JOSTLE IT
FOR WHAT IT PURPOSED.

I UNDERSTAND YOU NOT.
MY GRIEFS ARE DOUBLE.

HONEST, PLAIN WORDS
BEST PIERCE THE EAR OF GRIEF...

AND BY THESE BADGES
UNDERSTAND THE KING.

FOR YOUR FAIR SAKES,
HAVE WE NEGLECTED TIME.

PLAYED FOUL PLAY
WITH OUR OATHS.

YOUR BEAUTY, LADIES,
HATH MUCH DEFORMED US
FASHIONING OUR HUMORS.

EVEN TO THE OPPOSED END
OF OUR INTENTS...

AND WHAT IN US
HATH SEEMED RIDICULOUS.

THOSE HEAVENLY EYES
THAT LOOK INTO THOSE FAULTS,
SUGGESTED US TO MAKE THEM.

THEREFORE, LADIES,
OUR LOVE BEING YOURS,

THE ERROR THAT LOVE MAKES
IS LIKEWISE YOURS.

WE HAVE RECEIVED
YOUR LETTERS FULL OF LOVE.

YOUR FAVORS
THE AMBASSADORS OF LOVE.

AND IN OUR MAIDEN COUNCIL,
RATED THEM AT COURTSHIP,
PLEASANT JEST AND COURTESY...

AS BOMBAST AND AS
LINING TO THE TIME.

BUT MORE DEVOUT THAN THIS
IN OUR RESPECTS,
HAVE WE NOT BEEN,

AND THEREFORE MET YOUR LOVES
IN THEIR OWN FASHION,

LIKE A MERRIMENT.

OUR LETTERS, MADAM,
SHOWED MUCH MORE THAN JEST.

SO DID OUR LOOKS.
WE DID NOT QUOTE THEM SO.

NOW, AT THE LATEST
MINUTE OF THE HOUR,
GRANT US YOUR LOVES.

A TIME, METHINKS,
TOO SHORT...

TO MAKE A WORLD-WITHOUT-END
BARGAIN IN.

NO, NO, MY LORD,

YOUR GRACE
IS PERJURED MUCH.

FULL OF DEAR GUILTINESS...

AND THEREFORE THIS:

IF FOR MY LOVE AS THERE
IS NO SUCH CAUSE,
YOU WILL DO AUGHT.

THIS SHALL YOU DO
FOR ME.

YOUR OATH,
I WILL NOT TRUST.

BUT GO WITH SPEED
TO SOME FORLORN
AND NAKED HERMITAGE.

THERE STAY UNTIL
THE 12 CELESTIAL SIGNS...

HAVE BROUGHT ABOUT
THE ANNUAL RECKONING.

IF THIS AUSTERE,
INSOCIABLE LIFE...

CHANGE NOT YOUR OFFER
MADE IN HEAT OF BLOOD,

THEN AT THE EXPIRATION
OF THE YEAR,

COME CHALLENGE ME.

CHALLENGE ME
BY THESE DESSERTS.

AND BY THIS VIRGIN PALM
NOW KISSING THINE,
I WILL BE THINE.

AND TILL THAT INSTANCE,
SHUT MY WOEFUL SELF UP
IN A MOURNING HOUSE,

RAINING THE TEARS
OF LAMENTATION...

FOR THE REMEMBRANCE
OF MY FATHER'S DEATH.

HENCE HERMIT, THEN...

MY HEART...

IS IN THY BREAST.

WHAT SAYS MARIA?

AT THE TWELVEMONTH'S END...

I'LL CHANGE MY BLACK GOWN
FOR A FAITHFUL FRIEND.

I'LL STAY
WITH PATIENCE,

BUT THE TIME IS LONG.

A TWELVEMONTH AND A DAY,

I'LL MARK NO WORDS THAT
SMOOTH-FACED WOOERS SAY.

COME WHEN THE KING
DOTH TO MY LADY COME.

THEN, IF I HAVE MUCH LOVE,

I'LL GIVE YOU SOME.

I'LL SERVE THEE TRUE
AND FAITHFULLY TILL THEN.

YET, SWEAR NOT,
LEST YE BE FORSWORN AGAIN.

[ Laughs ]

MISTRESS,
LOOK ON ME.

BEHOLD THE WINDOW
OF MY HEART,

MINE EYE.

WHAT HUMBLE SUIT
ATTENDS THY ANSWER THERE.

IMPOSE SOME SERVICE ON ME
FOR THY LOVE.

OFT HAVE I HEARD OF YOU,
MY LORD BEROWNE,

BEFORE I SAW YOU,

AND THE WORLD'S
LARGE TONGUE...

PROCLAIMS YOU FOR A MAN
REPLETE WITH MOCKS.

FULL OF COMPARISONS
AND WOUNDING FLOUTS,

WHICH YOU ON ALL ESTATES
WILL EXECUTE...

THAT LIE WITHIN THE MERCY
OF YOUR WIT.

TO WEED THIS WORMWOOD
FROM YOUR FRUITFUL BRAIN,

AND THEREWITHAL
TO WIN ME,

IF YOU PLEASE.

WITHOUT THE WHICH,
I AM NOT TO BE WON.

YOU SHALL,
THIS TWELVEMONTH TERM
FROM DAY TO DAY,

VISIT THE SPEECHLESS SICK...

AND STILL CONVERSE
WITH GROANING WRETCHES.

AND YOUR TASK SHALL BE,

WITH ALL THE FIERCE ENDEAVOR
OF YOUR WIT,

TO ENFORCE
THE PAINED IMPOTENT
TO SMILE.

TO MOVE WILD LAUGHTER
IN THE THROAT OF DEATH?

IT CANNOT BE.
IT IS IMPOSSIBLE.

MIRTH CANNOT
MOVE A SOUL IN AGONY.

WHY, THAT'S THE WAY
TO CHOKE A GIBING SPIRIT,

WHOSE INFLUENCE IS BEGOT
OF THAT LOOSE GRACE,

WHICH SHALLOW LAUGHING
HEARERS GIVE TO FOOLS.

A JEST'S PROSPERITY
LIES IN THE EAR
OF HIM THAT HEARS IT,

NEVER IN THE TONGUE
OF HIM THAT MAKES IT.

THEN, IF SICKLY EARS,
DEAFED WITH THE CLAMOR
OF THEIR OWN DEAR GROANS,

WILL HEAR
YOUR IDLE SCORNS,

CONTINUE THEN,
AND I WILL HAVE YOU...

AND THAT FAULT WITHAL.

BUT, IF THEY WILL NOT
THROW AWAY THAT SPIRIT,

AND I SHALL FIND YOU
EMPTY OF THAT FAULT,

RIGHT JOYFUL
OF YOUR REFORMATION.

A TWELVEMONTH?

WELL...

BEFALL WHAT WILL BEFALL.

I'LL JEST
A TWELVEMONTH...

IN AN... HOSPITAL.

AY, SWEET MY LORD,
AND SO I TAKE MY LEAVE.

NO, MADAM.
WE WILL BRING YOU
ON YOUR WAY.

OUR WOOING DOTH NOT END
LIKE AN OLD PLAY.

JACK HATH NOT JILL.

COME, SIR. IT WANTS
A TWELVEMONTH AND A DAY,

AND THEN 'TWILL END.

THAT'S TOO LONG
FOR A PLAY.

SIR.

* OUR ROMANCE WON'T END
ON A SORROWFUL NOTE *

* THOUGH BY TOMORROW
YOU'RE GONE *

* THE SONG IS ENDED

* BUT AS
THE SONGWRITER WROTE *

* THE MELODY LINGERS ON

* THEY MAY TAKE YOU
FROM ME *

* I'LL MISS
YOUR FOND CARESS *

* BUT THOUGH
THEY TAKE YOU FROM ME *

* I'LL STILL POSSESS

* THE WAY YOU WEAR
YOUR HAT *

* THE WAY YOU SIP
YOUR TEA *

* THE MEMORY OF ALL THAT

* NO, NO, THEY CAN'T
TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME *

* THE WAY YOUR SMILE
JUST BEAMS *

* THE WAY YOU SING
OFF-KEY *

* THE WAY YOU HAUNT
MY DREAMS *

[ Men ] * NO, NO
THEY CAN'T TAKE THAT
AWAY FROM ME *

* WE MAY NEVER,
NEVER MEET AGAIN *

* ON THE BUMPY ROAD
TO LOVE *

* STILL I'LL ALWAYS,
ALWAYS KEEP *

* THE MEMORY OF

* THE WAY YOU HOLD
YOUR KNIFE *

* THE WAY WE DANCED
TILL 3:00 *

* THE WAY YOU CHANGED
MY LIFE *

* NO, NO
THEY CAN'T TAKE THAT
AWAY FROM ME *

* NO, THEY CAN'T
TAKE THAT AWAY *

* FROM ME

* [ Instrumental ]

[ All ]
* WE MAY NEVER,
NEVER MEET AGAIN *

* ON THE BUMPY ROAD
TO LOVE *

* STILL I'LL ALWAYS,
ALWAYS KEEP *

* THE MEMORY OF

* THE WAY YOU HOLD
YOUR KNIFE *

* THE WAY WE DANCED
TILL 3:00 *

* THE WAY YOU'VE CHANGED
MY LIFE *

* NO, NO, THEY CAN'T
TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME *

* NO, THEY CAN'T
TAKE THAT AWAY *

* THEY CAN'T
TAKE THAT AWAY *

* THEY CAN'T
TAKE THAT AWAY *

* NO, THEY CAN'T
TAKE THAT AWAY *

* FROM

* ME

[ Berowne ]
YOU THAT WAY,

WE THIS WAY.

[ Air Raid Sirens Blaring ]

[ Baby Crying ]

[ Machine gun firing]

[ Airplane Passes Overhead ]

[ Cheering ]

[ Berowne ]
AND WHEN LOVE SPEAKS,

THE VOICE
OF ALL THE GODS...

MAKE HEAVEN DROWSY
WITH THE HARMONY.

FROM WOMEN'S EYES,
THIS DOCTRINE I DERIVE.

THEY ARE THE BOOKS,
THE ARTS, THE ACADEMES...

THAT SHOW,
CONTAIN AND NOURISH...

ALL THE WORLD.

* [ Instrumental ]

* [ Continues ]

* [ Continues ]

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CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY
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