Life of Crime 1984-2020 (2021) - full transcript
A relentless ride through the streets and prisons of Newark, New Jersey's largest city, and desperate fight to survive the deadliest enemy ever to attack America.
Same place,
ten times in the eye.
You better watch it
with that damn knife.
Eee.
3D.
I'm gonna rob everything
I can get my hands on.
Put the camera away, okay?
Deliris Vasquez: That's before
I started using drugs.
I went to two years in college,
and that's when I met
my ex-husband
and that's when
I started using drugs.
Jon Alpert:
Tell me what you're gonna do.
What are you guys gonna do?
We're goin' to the store,
we're gonna try to...
- Jon: That store over there?
- Yeah.
Yeah, store over there.
We're gonna try to, um, load up.
Jon: What are you lookin' for?
Anything...
- Mike McGrath: Make some money.
- Yeah.
Jon: And if you get caught?
Go to jail.
Rob: I have to go to work.
That one. This one.
Eight sets of sheets.
That lady is from Harrison.
Mike: She knows me. Forget it.
Rob: Get the fuck outta here.
Jon: You're really good.
What's he doin'?
He's distractin' them?
Mike: Yeah, he's comin' out now.
There he is.
- Jon: Yeah?
- Yeah.
Job well done.
Uh, we got, um, sets of sheets.
I can make about $80 here.
Beats the minimum wage.
Jon: Were you afraid you were
gonna get caught in there?
I'm always afraid.
- But... the baby gotta eat.
- Mike: It's a chance you gotta take.
I gotta eat.
The rent gotta be paid.
Man: Hey.
Freddie Rodriguez:
One, two, three, four, five.
Protection. Never know.
Watch, watch.
I wanna speak. I wanna speak.
Man: Dance...
Aah!
Jon: Is it gonna be
hard to sell this stuff?
No. No, no. Not at all.
- Jon: Uh-huh.
- Rob: Easy.
Jon: Where you gonna take it?
- Gonna take it to a store down here.
- Mike: To a fence.
- Jon: Uh-huh.
- That's queen size.
- Let's go. Put it in the bag.
- We'll see you later.
Man: Yeah, yeah.
Rob: Ten dollars is cheap.
- That's queen size.
- Man: It's the big ones.
Rob: Let me see the money?
- Real money.
- Woman: What is that?
Rob: Let's go, Mike.
We didn't really make that much.
- Here, here's your half.
- Rob: The only...
- Jon: How much did it sell for?
- Mike: Take that right there.
Well, the thing that happened,
I-I didn't wanna waste time,
like, goin' around,
'cause I coulda made $80.
But sometime it happen
that you just gotta
give it away, 50 bucks.
- We lost $30...
- We sold 'em for 50 bucks.
But we didn't wanna waste time
'cause that time is money.
- Angela: You got your keys?
- Yeah.
About time you cleaned.
Real funny.
Jon: Robbie, who's everybody here?
Who is who?
Turn around.
This is Angela, my girl.
- Jon: Uh-huh.
- It's my father Ed.
Glad to meet ya.
- Jon: Hi, Dad, how you doin'?
- All right.
My father works.
How much you make?
How much you make an hour, Ed?
Four dollars and ten cents
an hour.
Rob: How much you bring
home at the end of the week?
- Eighty dollars a week.
- Ed Steffey: A week.
- Jon: Yeah? Yeah?
- Peanuts.
You have to make extra money
some way, survive.
Jon: You know what your
son does to make money?
Yep, I know.
Jon:
And what do you think about it?
I don't like the idea.
- Jon: No?
- Nope.
Rob: This is my man.
Just got outta jail.
Did 60 days in jail.
Jon: Yeah?
For what?
Uh, for possession, cocaine.
He's my original teacher.
He's the best.
Number one.
I don't like to brag,
you know, but...
We're goin' into the store,
get the stuff and come out.
Nobody see us go in,
nobody see us come out.
- Jon: What-what's in the box?
- Rob: Shirts.
Jon: How much you gonna
sell that for, you think?
I don't know what it's worth.
I don't want nobody
get my plate, man.
Jon: Just like that?
- Just like that.
- Just like that.
I don't know what's in there.
Jon: But wait, there was about
five people watchin' you.
- Ain't nothin'.
- Jon: Huh?
Anybody got the plate?
Anybody got the plate?
You know who's been watchin'.
Nah, don't worry about that.
Rob: These are bad shirts.
Tiger.
Well, you can't be perfect
when you steal everything.
- Hey, you could use them for pajamas.
- Rob: Look at that.
Got a zipper.
I'm givin' away free shirts.
Man: Still got some shirts.
Hey, over here! Over here!
These are so nice.
Can I have it?
Rob: The stuff that
we threw away before,
everybody's pickin' it
out the garbage.
- Jon: Now, listen. Would you give this stuff...
- We always give stuff out.
Jon: Would you give this stuff
away if I wasn't filmin'?
Yeah, we always do.
Don't believe him.
This is his first time.
- Jon: First time, huh?
- In history.
Jon: The first time. The first.
I'm always givin'...
I always been
givin' stuff around.
When I can't sell it...
You know,
but I always give shit away.
This is my family.
This is my little baby,
little girl, Elizabeth.
This is my lady, Mari.
Jon: How long you been together?
Freddie: About a year
and a half, two years.
Jon: Yeah?
Well, Mari,
did you know what, uh,
Freddie's occupation was
when you met him the first time?
Yeah.
I'm not gonna work
for $150 a week
when I could make $150 a day.
You know what I mean?
Jon: Are you worried
that they might grow up
and get into
the same type of life?
Yeah.
Freddie: I don't want 'em
to do what I do
because I know what I've
been through, you know.
I wouldn't want them
to be like this, you know.
Jon: Yeah.
So I don't wanna teach 'em
how to steal and shit
like that, you know.
I want 'em to get, go to school
and get good jobs
and shit, you know.
I'm planning on
stopping but, um...
it's not that easy.
I'm addicted to shopliftin'.
Jon: How much did he miss me by?
I'd say about an inch.
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
Angela: Oh, my God.
♪ Ha... ♪
Mike: You get a birthday cake.
That's your present.
Jon:
Whose birthday? Your birthday?
- Mike: Ange's birthday.
- Jon: Aw.
Mike: Old Aunt Ange.
Cut it open, look.
Motherfucker cost me
$20 of stolen money.
Shit. Shit.
Rob: Look what I gave
Ange for her birthday.
Photo book. Cost $20...
Mike: The cake I had paid for...
- I bought it.
- Jon: Yeah?
I bought it with money.
- Jon: Congratulations.
- Earned money.
Mike: Right? Huh?
Get the fuck in here.
Get in here.
Now, answer
this man's questions.
Woman: Happy birthday.
This is my, my girl
who got my baby down there.
- Jon: What?
- Mike: That's right.
That is a paycheck.
Rob: Not yours.
Mike: That's a paycheck.
My girl works hard.
Jon: She works and
gives you all the money?
- Right.
- She doesn't give it to me.
- We share it.
- Rob: Now...
now, he ain't gotta
shoplift no more.
Mike: We share it, you know.
Kid: Oh!
You better shut the fuck up.
Mike's girlfriend:
'Cause you know you're wrong.
Oh, my God. Please.
Mike: Now shut the fuck up.
Told you. You keep
our problems to us.
You don't go screamin' 'em out
in front of everybody.
I'll kill you, bitch.
Jon:
What are you fightin' about?
'Cause she's hardheaded
and don't listen,
and she's gotta learn to listen.
Rob:
Well, you ain't gotta hit her.
Yes, I do.
'Cause that's the only way
you concentrate...
- Mike's girlfriend: Rob, would you listen...
- You better shut up.
I told you.
I... Get in that hole.
Get back in that hole.
Get in there.
No. Please, Michael.
Get in there.
Now, you get back in there...
Rob: Forget your troubles.
Come on, be happy.
And stay in there
with the door closed.
Get the cat off the bed
-'cause it got fleas.
- Mike's girlfriend: Wait, it's hurt.
It's hurt, Michael.
You're gonna be hurt
in a minute.
Fuck the cat.
Jon: Well, do they fight all
the time like this or not?
Who?
Jon: Mike and his girl?
Kid: Every night.
One time with a bat. Pssh.
Jon: He hit her with a bat?
Remember on the lake?
I try to stay
outta their business.
I just...
He told me that she wanted $50
to give to her mother.
But she wanted $50 to give
to her mother to hold for her
so she has enough
for an abortion.
Mike don't want
to have an abortion.
That's why he hit her.
She's tryin' to be sneaky.
All right, lock the door.
Lock the door!
Jon: The first time he hit
you, what did you say to him?
Mike's girlfriend: That he
better never hit me again.
He cried and he promised me
he'd never hit me again.
He did it again and again
and again and again.
And that's it.
I'm not taking no more.
He can't beat love out of me
'cause he don't know
how to handle love.
Jon: And what are you
gonna do with yourself
when you get outta here?
Mike's girlfriend:
Get rid of this baby.
I ain't crazy.
Whoever's watchin' this,
don't think I'm crazy
'cause I ain't
this fuckin' stupid.
We've only been
going out two months,
and I ain't gotta take
this shit from him.
Freddie and Rob: ♪ I want
to wake up in the morning ♪
♪ At the good old
Caldwell Jail ♪
♪ Where the sun comes peepin'
into where I'm sleepin' ♪
♪ And the songbirds
singin' away ♪
♪ I wanna wonder... ♪
Rob: Over here.
Freddie: There's nobody here.
I'll get the suitcase.
Suitcase.
Rob: Excuse me. Can you
take this thing over here?
Guess you want to take a picture
of what's inside, don't you?
- Pass out some money.
- So $170's, uh...
- $170, $170...
- $80... $80...
$80, $85, $82.50 apiece.
$80.
$20, $40, $60, $80.
Rob: Puttin' away
$100 for today.
I had $200,
now I got $300 saved.
Probably be for my bail anyway.
Don't pay doin'. I'm serious.
I go out and make money,
I put it away.
It happens all the time.
I get busted, gotta use
all the money for bail.
Jon: Ange, if you could
wish for one thing,
what would you like to have?
Angela: If there's one
thing I could wish for?
Jon: Yeah.
Not no money.
To get married,
which somebody
can't use their brains for.
Jon: Wait. Oh, you're not
really married, married?
Angela: No.
Jon: I didn't know.
What took you back
to the streets, Rob?
'Cause you were doin' good here.
Uh, because...
It wasn't payin' enough.
They wasn't payin' enough.
Sid: Yeah, but you
were doin' good.
You had over a grand
in the bank.
Over a grand in the bank.
You were doin' good, Robbie.
Rob: Now, I ain't got
nothin' in the bank.
That's what I'm sayin'.
- Now, what you're doin'...
- Don't pay.
You don't have anything.
Now what I do,
I just make enough money
to put gas in my car every day,
buy a little food,
pay a little bills.
- I ain't got no next...
- Another thing.
You were happier, too,
when you worked.
You came down here every day
and you showed me your bank book
and you were happy about it.
Of course I was happy.
- Yeah, 'cause it was legit.
- Because I said,
"Sid, I got money, I earned it."
That's right. Well, you worked...
You know what I was
thinkin' about, Sid?
If I, like, get some money
together just to buy, like,
a big hot dog truck
just to start me off.
How you gonna get
the money for that?
Got any rich uncles?
- Any rich friends?
- Nobody.
Are you askin' me for the money?
You probably don't got it.
If you're gonna do right,
I'd give you the money.
I'd find a way.
Jon: Boy, this is a nice
little town here, Freddie.
I know.
Jon: How come you
always go to the suburbs
to-to do your robbing?
Because they don't have
that much security, you know.
If, um, anybody
chases you, you know,
it's easier to get away,
you know.
There ain't too many people.
You know, it's more simple.
It's more easier.
- Jon: What's this?
- R&S Strauss.
- Jon: Yeah.
- They sell auto parts.
It's come off.
Jon: How many times
you been in there?
Oh, couldn't even count,
so many.
I usually park my car
right here on the side,
leave it like this,
leave the keys in there,
and go in there and come out.
Jon: Tell me what you got.
Freddie: I got a burglar
alarm to stop thieves.
- Jon: That's what you stole?
- Yeah.
Yeah, I stole a couple of 'em.
I got a couple of 'em
in the trunk.
See, I'm... I've been arrested
for stolen cars before.
And I, and they givin' out
too much time,
so I'm tryin' to stop thieves.
Jon: What is this here, Freddie,
on your back? It says what?
Freddie: Perdon madre mia.
Jon: What's that mean?
Freddie:
"Forgive me, mother of mine."
Did that when I was
a juvenile 'cause I was...
I felt sorry, you know,
for my mother for...
I was always havin' her
suffer and whatnot, you know.
Jon: Yeah?
My mother and father
got divorced when we were young.
They put me in foster home.
Some white lady and white man,
they were pretty old,
they adopted me
and my oldest brother Frankie.
We lived with those people
for about a year.
My mother was goin' to court,
tryin' to get us back.
If I would've stayed there
with those rich folks,
I wouldn't be here right now,
I wouldn't be doin' this.
I always think about that.
I wish I would've stayed.
They would've
sent me to college.
I would've been a good boy.
I would've been, you know...
would've made
somethin' out my life.
Jackie.
Jackie, go like this.
Jon: What are you gonna do if
you ever catch your daughter
doin' anything bad?
- Whip her ass.
- Jon: Yeah?
She looked at me.
- She ain't gonna do nothin' bad.
- Did you ever spank him?
Yep.
Jon: You ever beat him up
when he did anything bad?
Yeah, he got a fork in my arm.
- Jon: Huh?
- A fork.
Jon: He stabbed you with a fork?
Rob: Yeah, I was
about five years old.
I had a box of toys.
This motherfucker
takes boxes of toys,
throwin' it down the furnace.
Jon: Why? Why would he
throw your toys out?
'Cause he was drunk.
- What do you gotta say about that?
- I wasn't drunk.
You was always drunk.
- Jon: Hey, Freddie.
- Freddie: Yeah?
Jon: Where'd everybody go?
Where is everybody?
My lady left.
She left me.
She went over
her mother's house.
Jon: Why?
I don't know.
I guess she got tired of me.
Jon: Is that a note
that she left you?
What's it say?
I don't know.
I think it says, uh...
"I'm sorry. I love you."
Somethin' like that.
I don't know.
I just feel down and out.
I don't know what to do.
I feel like goin' back to drugs.
And, um, I feel
like killin' myself.
I don't know what to do, man.
I don't know
what I'm gonna do with my life.
I keep doin' this shit, man.
I don't wanna get high
because I wanna do good.
And I can't do good
with problems on my mind.
This shit, man.
I do wanna straighten out, man.
Jon:
You got anybody you can talk to?
Anybody who's not
a drug addict, not a thief?
All my friends
are drug addicts and thieves.
Ain't got no straight friends.
You know that.
Rob: I got a girl
to take out tonight.
It's all right
if I take her, Ange?
Jon: You don't get jealous
when he's got other girls...
Yeah, I can't say nothin'.
- Jon: Why not?
- He'd be cursin' me up and down.
He was like,
"You don't pay rent."
Now, you can't say that...
I love to have loads of women.
Jon:
What are you gonna do, Ange,
if he brings another girl
back in here?
Yeah, my nerves
are gonna go then.
- Jon: Do you want to introduce me, Rob?
- Yeah.
- Hi.
- This is my girl.
- Jon: Hey. How you doin'?
- Deliris.
- Jon: Uh-huh.
- That's her baby.
- Jon: Let me see.
- The baby.
Hey, hey, hey.
- What's up?
- Look at the birdy.
Mike: Let's move.
What do you,
what do you expect for $300?
It's not supposed to
start perfect all the time.
- Jon: All right.
- Later, Jon.
Jon: I'll see you, guys.
Have a nice night.
- Same to you.
- Jon: You're not takin' me along, huh? Robert.
- Huh?
- Jon: You're not takin' me along?
- You along?
- Jon: Yeah.
- I wanna be alone.
- Jon: Oh, I'm-I'm sorry.
- Yeah, I wanna be alone.
- All right.
- All right, take care.
- Jon: We'll see ya.
All right.
Jon: Don't get in
too much trouble.
No, I stay out of trouble.
You know me.
Jon: All right.
As your name is called,
please answer, "Here."
Thank you.
Michael W. McGrath.
Lawyer: No answer.
I have no idea
where Michael McGrath is.
I haven't talked to him yet.
They gotta find me.
They... I'm not...
Listen. I put it like this.
I don't care if I
go to jail, all right?
But I'm not gonna go
and turn myself in
so they can just lock me
the fuck up right there.
Let 'em find me first.
You know what I mean?
No appearance. Mr. Prosecutor,
do you have a motion?
Prosecutor: Yes, Your Honor.
The State would move
for a bench warrant
and forfeiture of bail.
Very well. Bench
warrant will issue
for the arrest of
Michael W. McGrath,
and whatever bail posted
will be forfeited.
What can I do?
It's up to him, not me.
Jon: But you're gonna lose
the money that you put up.
How much did you put up? $600?
- $750.
- Jon: Yeah.
$750 I put up.
- I don't know.
- Jon: Well, did you know
that he wasn't
gonna show up today?
No, I didn't.
Had no idea.
- Jon: Do you know where he is?
- Nope.
I don't.
That's all the questions
you're gettin' outta me.
Jon: Okay, but he
just cost you $750.
Yep.
Kid wants to go on the run,
that's his business, not mine.
Jon: Yeah.
So what are you gonna do?
- What am I gonna do?
- Jon: Yeah.
I don't know.
Jon: You got half of
Newark lookin' for you.
- I'll move outta Newark.
- Jon: Yeah?
I'll move to the half
that ain't lookin' for me.
Fuck it. Right, Ange?
- Jon: You think
he's gonna be able to...
You think he's gonna be able
to keep himself outta jail?
Hey, if he
does it slick, he will.
Plus, I got a car,
I got some money, you know.
So, I'll be all right.
Believe me.
I'm gonna make it.
They ain't gettin' me.
Officer: Well, we got all the
information that we possibly need
to affect an apprehension
on our subject.
Now, we're just gonna
have to go out on the street
and get lucky.
He's 5'9", 150 pounds.
Come on.
Mom's gonna help me out?
I need it.
I gotta get outta here.
I gotta get out.
I miss it out there.
Jon: You said they were
never gonna catch you.
They got lucky.
- Freddie: You wanna see?
- Jon: What's that?
Freddie: Valium.
These pills take
all the problems
off the mind and shit, you know.
Jon: So how many pills have
you had altogether today?
Altoge... uh, 16,
plus the two-on-two.
So that's 16, 17,
18, 19, 20 pills.
And this is only
the-the beginning.
Judge: This defendant
has an extensive record.
Accordingly, you are hereby
sentenced to imprisonment
for a term of seven years
and hereby committed to the
custody of the commissioner
of the Department of Corrections
and until release
in accordance with law.
Jon: Freddie, they got you.
That's what you get
for using drugs.
Believe me.
Everybody out there,
everybody, listen
to what I'm sayin'.
It ain't worth it.
This is what I got,
and I'm gonna die here.
Bye.
Getting the anger out.
He's messing himself up.
He's messin' himself up
all the way.
Don't shoplift, get a damn job,
stay the hell off drugs,
and you'll live
a better life. Period.
You don't wanna listen to that,
go ahead and steal,
go ahead and do drugs
and watch where you be at.
And then you'll be like,
"I should've listened to Rob."
Don't do it.
Woman: You are here in
East Jersey State Prison.
It is now the home
of Michael McGrath.
Jon: Can we go in
and talk to Mike?
No. Since your last filming,
Michael no longer wants to
participate in this documentary.
Jon: Is this an easy
place to do time?
No. Rahway is a very difficult
place to serve your time.
Jon: Hey Mike.
The guards say
you're gonna be here
for a real long time.
Yeah.
Jon: Okay, this is goodbye.
- Good luck.
- Take care, Jon. All right. You too.
Jon: Are you gonna
make it all right?
Yeah, I'll be all right.
All right.
Freddie:
Welcome to Southern State.
This is my home
away from my other home.
This is my
second home right now.
Jon: What are you in for?
Freddie: Uh, robbery,
aggravated assault.
I got ten years.
This here is my partner
in the domino game.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, we the, we the champs.
Fourteen, twenty-six, thirty...
Thirty-five.
We won the championship
two years in a row in Rahway.
Anything he can need,
he has it here.
He has friends he can relate to,
recreational, free cable,
air conditioning in the summer,
heat in the winter time.
I don't like it
in here because...
can't get no, uh, sex.
Jon: Deliris, I haven't seen you
since you were a teenager
in Rob's car.
How long you been
workin' the streets?
Around six months.
Jon: Were you scared the
first time you stood out here?
Yeah. It's-it's takin'
a chance out here.
You don't know
if there's a cop or not.
Thank God up to today
I haven't got caught yet.
Jon: You're scared of
the, uh, the customers?
Yeah, 'cause you don't know,
you really don't know
who they are.
It could be a maniac.
So many stories out here
about people
killin' people and shit.
And then takin' a chance
today, too, with the AIDS.
Gotta be careful
what you do, too.
Thank you.
This is a bottle of coke.
Five-dollar bottle,
nickel bottle.
That's all to that.
Jon: How long you been
doin' that, Deliris, now?
- How long you been shootin'?
- For a year and a half.
Jon: Yeah?
And I'm not proud of it neither.
I-I hate when I, when
I start doin' this shit.
Here, hold my cigarette.
I'm pickin' out my hair.
That's what the drugs
make me do.
Make me pick my hair.
If it ain't my hair,
it's my face.
Jon: Oh, yeah?
Deliris: He knows what I
do but not how I do it.
Because I never do it
in front of them.
It's like if I see...
fleas or bugs
in my fuckin' hair.
It's just a habit I got
when I get high.
Jon: Is your mother doing
drugs every day now?
Hmm. Sometimes.
Interpreter: Every day,
it gets worse and worse.
Interpreter:
The kids are really suffering.
Jon: Mm-hmm.
Woman: Mr. Steffey, whenever
anyone gets paroled,
we focus the group on them.
So we're gonna focus on you.
What are your plans?
- Rob: My plans?
- For parole.
Rob: I'm not comin' back.
I'm not comin' back
for a fact. Okay?
Woman: To jail or here?
To any jail.
I'm not comin' back.
How many more years
you got left?
- Inmate 1: Nine.
- Nine? How many you got in?
One.
Fuck outta here. One?
Nah, you got more than that.
Inmate 2: Man, what you
gonna do when you out there?
Rob: I'm gonna do
the right thing.
I'm gonna do the right thing.
You gonna do the right...
What's the right thing then?
- Get a job.
- What kinda job?
Whatever kind I can get.
Steff, McDonald's
don't pay enough.
How you gonna
live off McDonald's?
I can sell burgers on the side.
Driver: I'm a waitin'.
What you gonna do? Relax?
Get high.
Go do it.
You got any?
I'm just afraid she's gonna get some
real strong stuff one time and it's...
You know what it's gonna do.
That bothers me.
Jon: Rob, you're done with jail.
What's up? Jon.
Free at last, huh?
I gotta go to the bank, man.
Get my money.
Right here. $878.
Can I have, um, some
50s, 10s, and 20s?
Thank you.
Oh, no. I forgot
my motherfuckin' teeth.
Fuck that, man.
Wait up, wait up, wait up.
Jon: What, you left
your teeth in jail?
Yeah. I left it in there.
Damn, I gots to get it, man.
Nah, nah, nah.
- I gots to get my teeth.
- Jon: Come on. Don't be embarrassed.
Nah, I gotta get my teeth, man.
I forgot that shit.
Jon: You're so anxious to get
out you forgot your teeth?
Hell, yeah.
I would've forget
my nuts if I...
Hold up, Jon.
I got to go back there, man.
I forgot my teeth.
It's on the table wrapped up.
Is there a way you can
get it for me, please?
Guard: Forgot your teeth?
Rob: Yeah. I forgot my teeth.
I got everything
except my teeth.
Thank you.
Shit, I ain't,
I ain't took a bus in so long
I ain't know where
to put the money, you know.
3:10.
Here I am...
free again.
What-what did you do?
Rob: What did I do
to get locked up?
Uh...
stealin', doin' drugs,
um, stolen property.
You know,
all-all kinds of bullshit.
Man: What's up, man?
How many more days
you got, Fred?
Got three more days
and, uh, wake up.
I leave Monday morning.
Guard: You gonna make
it out there this time?
Yeah, I'm gonna try.
- Guard: Good.
- You know.
Whatcha gonna do
when you get out there, Freddie?
Freddie: I don't know.
Get me, I'm gonna
try to get a job,
do the right thing, you know.
But sometimes that doesn't
work, you know, so...
Me and Freddie talk
a lot about him leavin'
and things he's gonna do
when he get home.
You know, I told him
to stay away from drugs.
If you stay away from drugs,
you'll be all right, you know.
That's his main concern.
Jon: Freddie, you love drugs.
I used to.
Why is everybody laughin'?
I think Freddie's scared
to go home though.
- Jon: Yeah?
- He told me a couple times
he was afraid to go home.
Yeah, a little bit. I am. Yeah.
Jon: Listen.
Listen. For people who
don't know who you are,
who are you?
- My name's Nelly.
- Jon: Yeah?
Freddie's mother.
- Jon: Freddie's mom?
- Yeah.
Jon: When's Freddie
comin' back from jail?
Monday.
Jon: Who in the world...
Nelly: Freddie's stepfather.
- Jon: Freddie's stepfather?
- Nelly: Yeah.
Jon: And this guy over here
with-with a striped shirt,
who is that guy?
That's my younger son, Raymond.
Jon: That's Raymond? Yeah?
- Yeah.
- We call Jungo.
- Jon: Yeah?
Good boy?
He's-he's drunk.
He's been drinkin' too much.
Jon: Muncho. Muncho!
So what's been happenin'?
- How you doin', Rob?
- All right.
- You got any jobs?
- We're kinda slow now.
Yeah, I need a job.
Yeah. I just outta jail.
Why's everything so dead?
Look at this.
This used to be full
with shop orders, right?
- Yeah.
- What have we got here now?
We have one here,
another job over here,
one, and that's it.
Years ago it used to be like,
these machines,
three machines running
at the same time all the time.
Look what you have now.
Literally one running
over there now.
- Officer William Lindsay: So how you been?
- Rob: I've been all right.
Look for work?
- Rob: Huh?
- Look for work?
- Yeah.
- Where?
I went all over.
I'm not gonna look no more.
Ain't no jobs out there.
And where I'm stayin',
they want some rent money
or I might have to leave.
So if I don't find a job soon,
I got no choice
but go hustle again.
I tried it, no jobs.
So if I wind back in...
up in jail,
I wind up back there.
Officer Lindsay:
Did I tell you it was easy?
No, you didn't say it was easy.
Okay. Good.
Rob: I brought chicken.
You got rice?
- Woman: What is it?
- Rob: Chicken.
- Chicken?
- Rob: Chicken.
I hope you know how to cook.
I just made dinner.
Well, cook tomorrow.
Thank you.
Real chicken.
What?
Kid 1: What?
What? Chicken.
Kid 1: No, don't make it.
Woman: Oh, God.
Kid 2: What is that?
Where'd you get a chicken from?
Rob: It's all right.
Hey, guys,
we got chicken tonight.
That sucker is big!
- Rob: How about if I cut the head off?
- No!
- I'm only cuttin' the head off.
- Kid: No!
- No!
- Woman: Rob!
Thank you.
Muncho...
Jungo, what's up?
That's enough for me.
Jon: Well, I gotta tell you.
This is a big difference
from the reception Rob got.
I mean, your family
really loves you.
I mean, he had nothin'
when he got out.
Yeah. Well, as you see.
Where's Freddie?
What's up, man?
What's happening, homes?
- About motherfuckin' time.
- Yeah.
Couple years, huh?
- You look good though, homes.
- Yeah.
Jon, I'm movin' today.
- Jon: What do you mean?
- Found another place to stay.
Jon: ♪ It's a beautiful
day in Rob's neighborhood ♪
Yeah, I'm openin' up, man.
You know, I open up
every morning, you know.
Sell some cars, make some green.
Jon: What are you
supposed to do here?
- Huh?
- Jon: What are you supposed to do?
I open up.
You know,
hang around, sell cars,
fix 'em, whatever.
There's always work
to be done here, you know.
Jon: Where you livin'?
I'm stayin' in the back here.
Yeah. Free of cost, you know.
Bought me a little
jacket here, you know.
Look presentable, you know.
Like a salesman, you know.
You gotta work to make money.
What else would
I be doin', shopliftin'?
How's this car? Good car, right?
- Yeah.
- You get...
How much you get
for this? $1,500, right?
- $1,800.
- Man: $1,800.
Rob: Eighteen.
Let me see if I got it.
One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
Jon: Where you off to, Rob?
Goin' out a little bit.
You know, after you work,
you gotta go out a little bit.
You can't stay here
all night, you know.
- Man: Oh, a little bit...
- Yeah.
Yeah. I gotta get
my love back, man.
My life ain't
complete without it.
Oh...
- This is Deliris.
- Kiky: Hey, Robert.
She was my ex-girl.
But that was, like,
how many years ago?
- Thirteen years ago.
- Thirteen years ago?
You know, and now
we got, like, kinda,
we got back together
and we seein'
if we can work it out, you know.
These are her kids.
Does she look happy
with me or what?
Maybe it's true love after all.
Kiky: Hello.
Rob: What you want?
What you want?
Deliris: Say thank
you for the ice cream.
Thank you.
- Thank you.
- Rob: You're welcome.
Jon: So what do you think?
You like Robert?
- Yeah.
- Jon: Nice guy?
- Yeah.
- Jon: Yeah?
How about you? Do you like Rob?
Yeah.
Hey!
Hey. Come on now.
This is not for
the public to see, you know.
I don't want to teach
nobody my moves, you know.
- I do my shit.
- You better not.
Play with Kiky.
Oh, shit.
- Jon: Hey Fred.
- What's up?
Jon: Your mother always
hang out of the window
like this all night long?
Freddie: Yeah. She
wants us to go to bed.
Once-once we go to bed,
she'll go to bed.
Jon: Really?
Freddie: Yeah, Roseann!
Oh, Freddie!
- You look good, girl.
- So you've been in prison?
- Yeah, six years.
- I've never been in prison.
I know you haven't
been to prison.
Never. I'm just a dancer.
I understand. You look good.
I like your voice.
I was lookin' at you
at the bar, you know.
And, you know,
I wanted to step to you,
but, uh, I didn't
wanna, you know...
I think you're really cool.
I have to go get my tips.
Okay. Go take care of business.
I ain't seen
nothin' like that in prison.
Man, there were
some fine asses in there.
Word.
I'm-I'm gonna
move him outta here.
- Rob: Yeah, I'm comin' with...
- Jon: What are you doin'?
I'm moving him
out of here to my home.
- Jon: Are you?
- Deliris: Yes.
Jon: You're gonna
move in with Deliris?
Yeah. Goin' back up.
- Jon: Movin' in, huh?
- Rob: Yeah, yeah.
Jon: You gonna domesticate Rob?
Rob: I'ma domesticate her.
Jon: What's been goin' on?
What's "domesticate" anyway?
Jon: What's all these hickeys?
Rob: Those are
love marks and shit.
- Jon: Yeah?
- Rob: Yeah.
Love marks.
Come on, son. That's my boy.
That's my boy.
As his parole officer,
I'm going to be
looking for anything
in the home environment
that... might cause
a problem for him
to be in that particular home.
- Freddie: This is my mother.
- Officer Neyda Carrillo: Yeah.
I seen you comin', I said,
"Uh-oh, she's comin'
to lock me up."
No. So what did you
do this weekend?
Nothin'. Just hung out
around here.
I don't wanna get high no more.
That-that's out, you know.
It's just the problems,
you know.
You're starting
a whole new life.
So now you have to learn
how to work within the system.
Okay.
Officer Lindsay: Uh, Mr. Steffey,
this is Mr. Turback.
He's assistant district
parole supervisor.
What's different from
the last time you were here
or the time before?
Rob: Oh, because
the time before,
I wasn't using.
I was doing good
and then I messed up,
and then I told you about it.
Officer Turback: I think you've
made admission to Mr. Lindsay
that you were using drugs.
Was that cocaine or heroin?
Yes, that was the heroin.
- Heroin?
- Dope.
Yeah, yeah. Right.
Officer Turback:
And when was that?
When was the first time?
That was a month ago,
right, when I came?
You tryin' to make sure
you're tellin' him
the same thing you're tellin' me
or are you tryin' to answer
his question honestly?
Rob: Honestly, what?
When's the last time
you used drugs, Mr. Steffey?
Rob: Over three weeks ago.
About three weeks ago.
- Over three weeks ago.
- When's the first time you used any drugs?
First time? About four
weeks or somethin' ago.
Officer Lindsay: Why is it that I
have a hard time believing you, Rob?
Rob: Well...
You seem to be
workin' in your mind,
"Well, what did I tell,
what did I tell Lindsay?
I better tell this guy
the same thing."
How come, how come
I have such a hard time...
Rob: Remember when
I came to see you?
Officer Lindsay: I think it's about
time we just-just laid it out, Rob.
You might as well be
asking this ball, Mr. Lindsay,
for all the intelligent answers.
Rob: Well, can you get me help?
That's the main problem.
Officer Turback: Help is there.
Rob: Well, I'll accept the help.
- You'll accept the help? Huh.
- Rob: Right.
We're not gonna
play with this, Rob.
We're gonna try
and get you help.
If that doesn't work,
you will be locked up.
- You understand that?
- Yeah, I understand.
Thank you, Mr. Turback.
We're gonna go to the car
while you go to the store
and buy somethin' to eat. Okay?
No, I wanna go with you.
To the c... to mommy's car.
I wanna go with you.
Yeah, but you gotta go
get something to eat first.
I'll wait for you
in the car. Okay?
I wanna go with...
Go where? I'm not goin'.
We're goin' right here.
Freddie: Yvette,
I'll be right back.
- Deliris: Where we going?
- Freddie: Take a right.
Now, stop right here like you
actin' like you're gonna park.
Stop right there. Stop.
Where you goin'?
- Deliris: Oh, okay.
- Freddie: It's too late now.
Go ahead. Park, park. Park.
In case the police
would've came by,
they would have seen
that you was tryin'
to learn how to drive, you know.
Poison. Poison used to kill
a lot of motherfuckers
years ago.
I'll be rolling in a minute.
Deliris: I don't give a fuck
about money, drugs, or nothin'.
The main thing is that
I love you and I'm with you.
That's the main thing.
You don't supposed to be hangin'
with people that get high.
You don't supposed to be
givin' people rides.
You said you were
gonna stop all that.
You're doin' the same shit.
- Are you or are you not?
- Deliris: No. No.
- No? What the fuck you been doin'?
- No, not-not like before.
- Not like before, Robert.
- It's the same shit.
No, it's not.
You believe when they
told you that I slept with him.
That's bullshit 'cause he
could tell you himself.
Take your ass on away from me.
I will. If that's
what you want, I will.
Rob: She thinks that she's
not doin' anything wrong.
My girl's stayin' out till
three o'clock with another man?
Fuck I look like,
a stupid ass or somethin'?
Is Mommy lyin' or what?
Everything she say
is a lie, right?
Okay. I believe her.
Freddie: Just got paid.
It's Wednesday night.
This is from sellin' dope.
- Jon: Yeah?
- One night's work.
Jon: Who sold dope?
Who-who sold it?
My bitch.
Jon:
Deliris sold the dope? Yeah.
Where'd you get
that money from, Deliris?
Where I got that money from?
She sold some dope. I told you.
No, I don't sell dope.
Jon: It's about one o'clock
in the mornin', right?
Yeah.
Jon: You stay up this
late every night, Kiky?
Yeah.
Jon: Every night
you're up this late?
That's terrible.
Who takes care of you and Chimo
when your mother goes off?
Do you have to
take care of yourself?
- Chimo: Mom!
- Kiky: Huh?
Jon: You have to
take care of yourself?
Yeah.
Chimo: Mom.
Jon: Where's your mother goin'?
Freddie: Hey!
Deliris: He's coming.
Jon: Where is she goin'?
She goin' to buy somethin'?
Kiky:
Yeah. She went to the, um...
she went to go to Pam.
Jon: To Pam?
You know who's Pam?
Jon: Uh, to tell you the truth,
I think I know
who lives up there.
It's the people
that sell D-R-U-G-S.
What?
Jon: They sell things up there,
and that's where she's gone.
No.
Freddie: Come on.
I got 'em, they're all right.
Jon: So, Deliris, did you
just buy some D-R-U-G-S?
Yeah. We got today and tomorrow.
Freddie:
Get the camera down, Jon.
Keep it down.
I don't want 'em to stop me
or nothin' with my fuckin' car.
Jon: So now it's almost
2:00 in the morning.
Chimo: Mommy.
Let's see.
It's 3:00 in the morning.
Chimo, you want me to stay here?
Answer me. I can't hear you.
What's that?
Freddie: Do you want
me to stay here?
No.
- Bye, Jon.
- Jon: Bye.
Do you want me to go...
- Jon: See ya.
- See ya.
What's up, Rob?
Rob. What's up, bud?
Rob: I don't wanna talk.
I don't care
if she goes fuckin',
I don't care, man.
I don't know, Rob. You pick
some of the strangest women.
Like, take me, for instance.
Why don't y'all cheer Rob up?
'Cause Rob, me and Rob
did prison time together.
What's up?
We got Rob out the car now.
He's feelin' comfortable.
All right, Rob.
- Rob!
- Man: We got Rob...
- Rob: Nah.
- Sure?
- I don't...
- Man: It's on you, man.
You want a taste, Rob?
- How much money you got?
- Rob: You tryin' to tempt me?
- You got some money, Rob?
- Rob: Yeah, I got money.
You want a taste?
I wouldn't even
do that to you, Rob.
You're strong, man. Stay strong.
- I am. I don't want that shit, period.
- Man: Stay strong.
Devil is callin' you, Rob.
"Rob... get me, Rob.
Come on, Rob."
It's the devil.
"Rob, you got
a pocketful of money, Rob.
Rob, Rob."
You hear him? Get him
off your shoulder.
Knock him off, Rob.
You could tempt me all day.
I don't want the shit.
- If he feel like drinkin'...
- But it could be a time
that I want somethin'...
- You know what I mean?
- He gonna do it.
Then I'll be "Fuck,
I'ma get me a bag."
- And ain't nobody can stop him...
- Know what I mean?
'Cause if that's what
the man wanna do,
he gonna do it.
Freddie: "Rob, my blood!"
Do you know Deliris?
Rob: Yeah, I know her.
Remember her.
Everybody's saying
she's my wife now.
I don't know why
everybody sayin' that shit.
- Rob: Must be true then.
- Freddie: Hey...
Deliris: Yeah, I know.
Freddie: So I took
Deliris, and I asked her.
I said, "Who got it better,
me or Robert?" You know.
And she said me.
She said, "You got it
bigger and better."
But you gotta understand,
I'm Puerto Rican.
Today is my parole day.
I gotta go see my parole,
and my urine is dirty, dirty.
I'm gonna take
a bottle of Clorox
and stick my fingers in it,
you know.
And when I go and take a urine,
I urinate on my hand.
- Jon: You're dirty?
- Yes. You know that.
- Jon: Real dirty?
- Real, real dirty.
I can observe the stream.
I can observe what he is
putting into the bottle.
If anyone had not
flushed before him,
he could not simply,
uh, do what we call
a bowl scoop.
- Jon: A what?
- A bowl scoop.
Freddie: Yeah. Scoop it out
the bowl from under here.
Jon: Are you serious?
Man: The bowl scoop is
not the right temperature.
After so many years
of taking urine samples
and handling them,
you get to know
what temperature they're
supposed to feel like
in the palm of your hand.
You know, and...
Jon: You know what's
kosher and what's not.
Basically, yeah.
Oh, wow.
But it's better
than nothing, Freddie.
I'm so proud of you
and how hard
you tried to do this.
It shows... it shows that you
are really tryin' hard here
to prove to us
that you're not doin'
anything out there
in those streets.
And if this comes back positive,
you're in trouble!
Your goose is cooked, hon.
Don't worry, it won't.
I know it won't.
I know it won't.
I'm betting on it.
It was like 80% Clorox
and 20% urine.
Now jump the fuck in before
I knock you the fuck down.
- Come on. Get in.
- Jon: All right.
What, you got
business to take care of?
- Yes, I want...
- Jon: You're gonna get high probably.
Yeah. I'm gonna go get me
a bag of dope, man,
after all that.
Get me a couple bags of dope.
Get in the fuckin' car.
Oh...
Get the fuck in the...
Get in the car.
Where they goin'?
They still okay or what?
- Shut up!
- Freddie: Shut up!
- Jesus Christ.
- Deliris: Chimo.
Freddie: Come on, Kik, I mean...
We're just gonna
come right back, all right?
Mom, I wanna buy...
Freddie: Go ahead.
- Real quick before the kids get back.
- Deliris: Yeah.
Man: Yo. What's up, bro?
Rob:
Yeah, I'm motherfuckin' gettin'
drunker than a motherfucker.
I ain't did no drugs yet.
And I hope I stay like that.
- You know, I'm havin' a good time...
- I hope you stay like that, too.
Oh, of course.
You know, I'm havin'
a good time fuckin' drinking.
But once you've been,
like, addicted to drugs,
after you drink,
that shit makes you
wanna do the drugs
that you want.
You know what I'm sayin'?
Well, are you, are you
learning from your mistakes?
Oh, I learned.
But still, the force
of drugs is so powerful.
It make you wanna go back.
You know what I'm sayin'?
Man, just learn
from your mistakes, bro.
Yeah.
Man 1: You'll get there.
You'll get there.
Man 2: Butch, what's up, man?
Man 1: What's up, man?
Gonna go get a AIDS test.
Jon: How long's it take
before you get the result?
Freddie: Three weeks.
Probably be dead by then, right?
Nurse: Have you done
this before other places?
Freddie: No.
I'm gonna tie you up
and see what's going on.
When the results come in,
who's gonna tell me, you?
- I am.
- Good.
Hurts still?
Jon: Freddie, your
life in a bottle here.
Yeah, right?
- Jon: Kiky.
- Kiky: What?
That's dangerous,
your brother sittin' there
right at the window.
Chimo, get off the window.
Man: They're abusive.
They are very abusive.
The fact of the matter is that...
Oh, that's that asshole.
Man: Yeah.
Came to find out
the results of my tests.
Nurse 1: Okay.
Nurse 2:
Okay. You have your card?
Yes.
I'm scared.
Everybody's dyin'.
One or two people left
that I used to run with.
And they're on their way out.
- Nurse: You all right?
- Freddie: Yeah.
Nurse: Okay.
Your results came back reactive.
Basically, what that means
is that you have been
exposed to HIV.
How you doin'?
It's okay. It's all right.
Turn around.
- You don't remember my face, do you?
- No.
And you got a little run
out your nose, too, okay?
- That's 'cause you...
- I... Of course. I got a cold.
- I'm freezin', man.
- Officer: It's not that cold out here, okay?
It's not that cold. Your no...
your nose is runny,
your mouth is dry.
Listen, you're talkin'
to me, all right?
You ain't talkin' to somebody
else on the streets, okay?
I know what you do, whatever.
What I'm gonna advise you now
is to stay away
from these areas.
-'Cause if I catch you again tonight...
- I am gonna stay away, man.
Listen to me.
I'm talking to you.
If I catch you again tonight,
you know what I'm gonna
have to do, right?
Okay, I gotta do what I gotta do
and lock you up for
obstructing a public passage.
I can't leave you out here
'cause you're gonna
get yourself hurt.
You're gonna get shot by
these jokers over here, okay?
- All right.
- Okay?
'Cause you know they'll shoot you
in a heartbeat 'cause you're white.
You don't belong
around here, all right?
Plain and simple.
He's the kinda guy that one day
we're gonna catch him
somewhere dead.
Which is a shame
'cause he's actually,
you know,
I'm not gonna judge him,
but he doesn't seem
like a bad guy.
But he's hooked on that stuff.
And he'll go anywhere
and he'll do anything
to catch his drug,
to get his drugs.
- Deliris: Eight plus one?
- Chimo: Nine.
Four minus two?
Two.
Deliris: Do me a favor.
Look through that window
and check if...
Remember Jose?
Girl: Jose!
My aunt said hold on and she'll
be down in a few minutes.
Every time she's clean,
he's right, he's right there,
she goes right back in.
See you in a few days.
I don't know
what to say, but, um,
my heart is
full of love with her.
And I wanna know.
I know that we love you,
but we don't know
how much you love us.
Oh, I love you. I love you all.
Kiky: If you love us all, why
you not doing so good for us?
We want you to come back,
but you never try.
I will.
If you love us so much,
why your hand is
halfway on the door?
'Cause, uh,
I'm ready to go outside.
I'm getting hot.
I'll see y'all tomorrow.
Good night, Charlie.
Good night.
If you wanna kill yourself,
easy way out.
I really wish
my life was different.
Judge:
We're here on sentence day,
State of New Jersey
versus Wilfredo Rodriguez.
Count one of
first-degree armed robbery.
Count two of fourth-degree
possession of an imitation firearm.
Prosecutor:
Judge, this is, um, a person
who's been afforded
every opportunity
within
the criminal justice system.
And at a certain point,
it's just time to, uh,
warehouse this type
of individual.
Judge:
Gonna commit Mr. Rodriguez
to the custody
of the commissioner
for 15 years in prison,
that sentence to run concurrent
to any violation of parole
that may be imposed
as a result of this sentence.
Okay, good luck to you,
Mr. Rodriguez.
Oh!
Oh, shit.
Get me up.
Oh, you's a heavy fuck.
Should've took me off
faster, you know.
Now, it gets hard, right, Burt?
- Thanks, my brother.
- Burt: No problem.
My Nu... Nubian brother.
Robbie, you had
a little too much.
Come on,
get yourself together, man,
before you fall again.
Get up, man. Come on, yo.
That's what drugs do, see?
Have you nodding
and falling, man.
Rob?
How many bags you did today?
Huh, Rob?
Rob?
Yo?
Rob?
Well, I suggest for people
that doin' drugs, man,
look at the place
where Rob is at
and look at Rob right here
and his condition
of being on drugs, man.
He don't straighten up himself,
this is where he's gonna die at.
Man: That's where you
gonna find him dead at,
right at this house right here.
This abandoned building.
- Hey, Jon.
- Jon: Freddie!
- What's up, buddy?
- Jon: Freddie, how are you...
It's been seven long years.
Jon: What is this place?
This is Riverfront State Prison.
Jon: Yeah?
This has been my view
for the past seven years.
You know what I'm sayin'?
And, um, I got one more to go.
But hopefully, I'll be
in a halfway house
and I won't have
to see these wires
and these barbed wires anymore.
Jon: You ever think
about escaping?
I mean, you could swim
right across the river.
Freddie: Nah, nah.
I'm not thinking about escaping.
- Jon: Yeah.
- It's not for me.
Too old to be runnin', you know.
Now, I'm gonna,
I want to show you,
I want, I wanna show you, um...
what, um...
helps me stay clean.
Right there.
My daughter, my son.
I haven't seen 'em
in about seven,
six to seven years now.
Hey, Jon, what's up?
- What's happenin'?
- Jon: How long's it been?
Um, this'll be
28 months... this month.
Two years, four months.
Jon: Tell me what you
were locked up for?
I was locked up for robbery,
second-degree robbery.
Jon: You look good.
Look like you've been eatin'.
Rob: Yeah, I've been eatin'.
Jon: Exercising.
Exercising every day. Joggin'.
See, this, like, people...
some people
need to get locked up
but not for
a short period of time.
Jon: Well, I think you were
a good candidate for that
because you were
basically gonna die
- unless you went to jail.
- Yeah. Yeah.
Deliris: These were the track marks
from where I was shooting up at.
Yep.
So now look where we all wind up
and it's all
because of the drugs.
All because of the drugs.
Rob was locked up.
I'm locked up.
Freddie's locked up.
And it all got to do with drugs.
Drugs don't bring nothin'.
They just gonna kill you.
They almost killed me.
Thank God I'm here.
I thank God I'm here today.
Step through here.
Guard: All right, kids, is you
ready to visit your mother?
What's your name,
Kiky, Kimo... Chimo?
Kiky: Every day I pray at night
to see if I could
see you to come out.
Deliris: Keep prayin',
because I'm praying, too.
That's the only thing
that will help us,
is the Lord
to hear our prayer, that's it.
You doin' good in school?
- You're not doin'...
- Kiky: Straight C's.
- Deliris: Huh?
- Straight C's.
Deliris: C's?
What happened
to the A's and B's?
I don't know.
Wait till I come out.
Things will start
getting better.
Remember that paper I gave you
that said you were
in my heart and my soul?
I still love you that way.
- Deliris: I love you, too.
- All right.
I want her to stay so she could
get more clean and stuff,
but I still want her
to be there for me.
- Jon: But she never has been.
- No.
Only when I was small.
Jon: And now, what do you
think's gonna happen to you?
To me? I don't really know.
I know I'll stay
in school and stuff.
Never use drugs.
When someone ask me somebody,
uh, smokin' and stuff,
I'll say no.
I'll walk away.
And I know what's gonna happen.
Jon: You think you're
gonna have a good future?
Hmm. Yeah.
And I know I try
to keep it bright, too.
This is a therapeutic community
drug... drug program.
- Bunch of people havin' meetings...
- Jon: Yeah.
Freddie: and, um, tryin'
to stay away from drugs.
I've been drug free
for a while now, and I...
Jon: How long?
Uh... about a year, I'll say.
Ten months to a year.
Jon: So for the first
four years in jail...
I was getting high
just about every day.
Jon: Yeah?
I, um, take computer class
in mornings here.
This is my teacher,
Miss Dartash.
- Hi.
- Jon: Hi, how are you?
Good morning. Good morning.
Freddie: As you can see,
I've been gettin' 100s.
Got 100 for this one,
100 for this one.
Sometimes I, um, get 90s.
96, 98.
But I try to keep my 100s.
Jon: Hey, Rob. You're out?
What's up?
Jon:
What are you supposed to do...
I gotta go
to the parole board now
and see what they want me to do.
Officer Kevin Mahoney:
Hi, I'm Mr. Mahoney.
I'm gonna be your parole officer
while you're out here
on the street.
Rob: Right.
And I see you're new to Trenton.
- Rob: Right. I'm new.
- Okay.
- You've been through this before.
- Yeah.
Officer Mahoney: How do you think
you're gonna make out this time?
- Good. Yeah.
- Officer Mahoney: You think so?
I'm determined
to do good this time.
- Officer Mahoney: Your drug was heroin, right?
- Yeah.
That's a real
tough thing to kick.
Yeah.
They wanna saturate you
with supervision
-for the first couple months, okay?
- That's all right.
To kinda get you steerin'
towards the right direction.
- That's good.
- So if there's any kinda slip-ups,
everything could be
picked up right away.
So we go through the '80s
with some shoplifting,
receiving stolen property.
All this is related
to your addiction.
See, this is
the criminal mind, too.
You got about
seven, eight date of births
and seven, eight, maybe more
Social Security numbers.
Antoine Boustany,
Robert Hansen, Robert Medina.
Do you ever get parolees
that really wanna straighten up
and that, you know,
and, you know,
- and they do good?
- A lot of guys.
With big records like me?
We have a lot of guys...
It's possible.
Rob: You know where
I could cash this at?
- I ain't got no ID.
- Officer Mahoney: Okay.
Rob: Robert Medina.
I got you as Robert Steffey.
And I'm saying if this
was for Robert Steffey,
I could take you
to the bank and...
See what happens
when you use fake names?
Officer Mahoney: Yeah, jeez.
I'll get it cashed.
Don't matter.
There you go.
- All right. See you Monday.
- Rob: Thank you.
- Rob: All right.
- Officer Mahoney: Probably be out
sometime this week
to see you, too.
- All right.
- Rob: Okay.
- Good luck.
- Rob: All right.
- Freddie: Thanks.
- All right.
Take it easy.
- Freddie: Thank you.
- Woman: All right.
Don't forget your cart.
Freddie: This is my property.
My clothes, my cigarettes
and stuff like that.
Woman: Sorry.
Jon: Freddie, what are
all these pills for?
It's my medication for my HIV.
Give me all this medication.
I've been had this medication.
I was supposed
to have been takin' it.
- I haven't been takin' it.
- Jon: Why not?
Because the doctor told me
it was gonna give me
a false positive for marijuana.
And since they take
my urine so much,
I was afraid that it was
gonna come back positive
and they was gonna
send me back to prison.
So I stopped takin'
my medication for that reason.
Jon: You mean you had to between
your health and your freedom?
Correct.
And I did what I had to do
because what was I gonna do,
get sent back to prison?
Come on.
I've had enough of prison.
Mr. Morrison.
- Take care of yourself.
- Thank you for everything.
- All right.
- Thank you so much, sir.
- Peace.
- Yep.
- Thank you again.
- Mr. Morrison: You're welcome.
Freddie: Ten years.
Freedom!
Officer Mahoney:
Comin' over to Eckerd's here.
This is where Bob's been working
for the last couple months.
He's a stock person.
He's working his way up
to general manager.
- Jon: You serious?
- Yeah.
He's actually working,
legitimate work,
making legitimate money.
And he's, uh,
you can see for yourself
when we come in.
Hey, Bob.
- Mr. Mahoney, what's up?
- How you doin'?
Are you going to your meetings?
- You haven't been using any drugs?
- Rob: Nope.
Officer Mahoney: What
kinda work you doin' here?
I stock the shelves.
- I help customers.
- Mm-hmm.
You know, when we have,
like, items that's on sale,
I mark 'em down.
When you were the different Rob,
you were out kinda
rippin' stores off.
Yeah, I used to come
to the stores and shoplift.
- And shoplift.
- I used to take the stuff off the shelves.
Now, I'm loadin' it back up.
All right. How long
you been sober?
And, uh, how long
you been straight the last...
Uh, sober? Like 29 months.
- Officer Mahoney: That's it.
- Twenty-nine months altogether,
in jail and I got out, you know.
Twenty-seven months, like,
three months on the street.
- Officer Mahoney: Yeah.
- Yeah.
Officer Mahoney: It's happened.
I've seen transformations before,
- but, again...
- I don't believe in myself.
It's a couple months.
I don't believe in myself.
Officer Mahoney: It's a couple months.
It's a start.
Once, you know, you take,
as your program says,
one day at a time.
- And that's what you do...
- There's things in here
that I could steal,
and they wouldn't even
know about it.
But I don't want to do that
'cause these people,
because these people
trusted me and gave me a job.
A lot of people went through
a lot of trouble
to get me a job.
You know what I mean?
And help me.
And why am I gonna mess that up?
Officer John Larkin:
They're ready for you.
Miss Shafran is gonna be
your permanent parole officer,
but she's gonna be out
for the next
week and a half or so.
In the meantime, I'm gonna...
I'm gonna supervise you.
My name, Larkin.
On the back,
that's my direct line.
- Freddie: Okay.
- Okay?
We both have voice mail.
So if you need to contact us,
there's no excuse why you can't
leave a message, all right?
- How long you been away?
- Ten years.
- Officer Larkin: Ten straight?
- Yeah.
All right.
Tats, tattoos, scars, marks.
Freddie: Chest, back, arms.
Take off the shirt.
Man, parole was
kinda strict today.
Jon: Deliris, you're back.
Where you been?
Alone.
Just came out the rehab
after being there
for three months.
Thank God.
- Jon: You're clean?
- I'm clean for three months.
Thank God. I don't have to
wake up sick no more.
I don't have to go crazy
looking for my drug no more.
Jon: When she walked back in
and you saw her
lookin' like this,
were you surprised?
- Chimo and Kiky: Yeah.
- Jon: Huh?
- Yeah.
- Jon: Why?
Because she got fatter.
Coach: Just like that.
See what I'm saying?
Today is your day.
It's your game.
If you choose to do good,
then you're gonna do good.
If you choose to get up there
and get nervous and get scared,
then you're gonna
make a bad choice
because you're not
gonna do your best.
Always do your best.
No matter what you do in life,
do your best.
Catcher: Come on, Kiky!
Coach:
Stay relaxed. Stay relaxed.
Batter: Ow.
Coach: Don't let other
people get you upset.
Don't get nervous,
and don't be worryin'
about you're gonna hit,
hit the batter.
Because your
concentration is just
throwing to the catcher's glove.
Woman: Swing at it.
Kid: Come on, come on.
Coach: One, two, three!
Kids: Cardinals!
Coach: Today, Kiky
gets the game ball.
We're gonna get
the whole team to sign it.
- Jon: Yeah.
- Coach: Okay?
Mom.
Jon: What are we doing?
Protection. You never know.
I don't work in Neverland.
Officer Morano:
7-1-6 and 7-5-4. 10-6 to 2-74.
Johnson Avenue, Newark.
Officer Larkin: How you doin'?
Hi, little guy.
Freddie: John.
Officer Larkin: How you doin'?
How you doin', Freddie?
- Freddie: Hey, Mr. Larkin.
- Officer Larkin: What's up?
Officer: Hi, how are you?
How's everything? Hello, sir.
How you doin'? How you doin'?
How you doin'?
Well, how many people are here?
I mean, is this all pe...
like, in the kitchen...
No, no, no.
My father just came over.
Okay. But besides the people
in the kitchen here
and all the kids, is that,
is that everybody in the house?
Or are there people upstairs?
I'm just asking outta curiosity.
Freddie:
Just my brother's upstairs.
First thing, I need
a urine from you.
Okay? Bathroom around here?
Uh, let's go upstairs.
Officer Larkin: You got it.
How you doin'? Hi.
I'm Officer Larkin.
I'm his new PO.
Freddie: That's my sister
and my brother-in-law.
Officer Larkin:
How you doin', guys?
- After you. Huh?
- Man: Good luck.
Officer Larkin: Let me ask you, Freddie.
How bad is it at the house?
What do they use? Heroin?
I honestly don't know.
I think they're smokin',
but I'm not sure.
- Because...
- Officer Larkin: Smokin' what? Crack? Weed?
I would think. You know, I've
been away for a lot of years.
I don't really know
too much about that stuff
and how you act.
I think the best step for you
is to get out of that house.
You wanna stay away from chaos?
I think you should
get outta Johnson Ave.
Okay.
I would recommend
this place on Hunterdon Street.
Four hundred and sixty dollars
a month.
Right here. That's the house.
- You John?
- John: Yeah.
Officer Larkin: How you doin', John?
I'm Officer Larkin.
- This is Officer Morano.
- Officer Morano: How you doin'?
- All right.
- Officer Larkin: This is Freddie.
Freddie's a possible renter.
- Check it out.
- Bedroom.
This is the bathroom.
Officer Larkin:
You ever been on your own?
Without family around?
- Just your own place?
- No.
If you decide
you can't take this place,
you're either going to a hotel
for however long it takes
you to find a place.
You're not goin' back
to Johnson Ave.
I don't feel, I don't feel
comfortable here honestly.
John:
You don't feel comfortable?
No.
Officer Larkin: Well, then
you-you-you're mandated,
I'm mandatin' you
to stay at that hotel.
I don't care if you
go through all your savings.
Hotel concierge: So the total
will be for two nights is...
$246.38.
- And that's the cheapest you have?
- Yes.
- Freddie: I don't know how you do this.
- Officer Larkin: Arrow down.
- Officer Morano: See which way the arrow is?
- Freddie: Yeah.
Officer Morano: Like that.
- Officer Larkin: Go ahead.
- Officer Morano: That's your key.
Freddie: Okay, that's better,
this is better than the dump.
Officer Larkin:
Little bit better?
Yeah, right? Not too shabby.
I wish I could, um, stay here.
Well, if you wanna pay
$3,000 a month.
I don't even make that much.
If I find you laying your head
at Johnson Avenue,
you could go back to prison.
Keep that in mind.
Freddie:
It's a nice place, but...
and I wish
I could stay here, but...
it's not possible.
I don't make the money
to stay here.
Jon: Deliris, introduce
me to your friends.
- Hi.
- This is Tanya and Celeste.
- Jon: Uh-huh.
- How are you?
Jon: How are you?
Nice to see you.
What type of drugs
you been takin'?
Heroin and cocaine.
- Jon: Yeah? How about you?
- Yeah, same thing.
Jon: Where you gonna
take 'em, Deliris?
Where can they go
to get cleaned up?
I was gonna take 'em
to Secaucus, where I went to,
'cause they have
eight programs out there.
Jon: But I heard that they're closing
that program down 'cause of tax cuts.
- Yeah, I heard that, too.
- Jon: And it's hard to get people in, right?
It's hard to get a bed.
- Come on.
- Let's go.
Deliris: I figure if I can do
it, y'all could do it, too.
Tanya: Yeah, I could do it.
I have two girls that would
like to go into the program.
Okay, I spoke to...
Excuse me, Chimo.
I spoke to the guy
where I went to.
And he said that there ain't
no beds right now.
But he's gonna try
to get in contact with...
'cause he's on lunch,
off the campus.
What he's gonna try to do
is talk to the guy
so they could take ya
preadmission through the phone.
And once they do that,
he'll let ya know
before he finish talkin' to ya
if he could squeeze ya
in a bed for this weekend.
Why are you cryin'?
I wanna go.
Deliris: We're gonna
try through all corners.
- Woman: I ain't gonna give up.
-'Cause I know, I know the feeling.
And I know
what y'all goin' through.
And I know how it is
when you get sick and tired
of being sick and tired.
So we just gotta keep trying.
This is my friend Evelyn.
She needs someone
to help her get into a detox.
I told her that I'm gonna
see what I can do.
You know, and she, and she's
willing to accept the help, right?
Evelyn: Yes, I am.
Jon: What type of
drugs are you using?
- Heroin.
- Jon: Huh?
- Heroin.
- Jon: Oh, yeah?
- Rob: What else?
- Crack.
Yeah.
Jon: How do you get the money?
Prostitution.
Just like Deliris.
But maybe she's smart enough
to stop the shit.
Jon: So how long
you been addicted?
Almost six years now,
on and off.
Jon: Yeah?
It's about helping people now.
I done went to the jail
in Trenton, spoke.
I went to the youth house
and spoke.
Yeah, I went to Bo Robinson's.
There were like
200 inmates I spoke.
Freddie:
We're gonna go see my children.
Fifteen years, I've seen 'em
a couple times in between.
I really don't know them.
And, uh, I'm goin' upstairs
to see 'em now.
I feel nervous.
I feel scared. I don't know.
Look, it's a snowman.
- Kids: Who is it?
- It's Freddie.
Daughter: Oh, my God. What's up?
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. How you been?
Freddie: I wanna...
hang out with y'all
as much as I can.
Well, you know
we live in New York, so...
I know, and that's the problem
because I can't travel
to New York.
- Yeah.
- Well, right now, you know.
Maybe in the near future
when they take these
restrictions off me.
We're goin' to DrJays?
What you need, Freddie?
Freddie: I don't need
nothin', my brother.
- They construction, right?
- Yeah.
Yeah. I like these pants.
These are hot.
I like these right here a lot.
I'm gonna look
at the hats again.
Daughter: I feel comfortable.
I thought I would
feel uncomfortable, but...
I do. I feel very comfortable
around you.
Do you?
You feel comfortable around me?
No. Nah, I do.
But not-not-not completely.
I feel it still, you know.
That's messed up.
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
♪ Happy birthday
dear Elizabeth ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
Blow out the candles.
Thank you.
Blow out the candles.
- Make a wish.
- Woman: Enjoy.
This has been one of the
best days of my life.
Uh, 'cause I haven't
seen you in a long time, and...
and you come back,
and I'm happy,
and it seems like
you never even left.
And I wanna thank you so much.
I love you so much!
Freddie: You're
makin' me all mushy.
Jon: How many drug pushers
do we have in the courtyard?
Like ten.
Jon: How in the world is Deliris
gonna be able to stay clean
when there is a lot
of people out here
who are gonna help her out
if she wants to do
the wrong thing?
Man: All it is out here, man.
Niggas just be sellin' it, man.
They don't give a fuck
about a damn thing.
They're makin' at least
$2,000-$3,000 a day.
Absolutely.
Outta six dealers, each one
of 'em can make that much a day.
- Man: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Jon: Whoa.
How long does it take you
to make that much money?
Man: About-about a half hour.
- Jon: For real?
- Man: Yeah.
Deliris: You know how much
money they made with me?
Jon: I don't know, Deliris.
I mean, if we look around here,
you're almost surrounded.
Right? How do you
feel sometimes?
- Tempted.
- Jon: Yeah.
Man:
It's all about survivin', man.
And she gotta be strong
for herself.
You gotta be
within your own self.
Man: That's it.
Right now, if you ain't
strong enough, man,
you ain't gonna
survive our here, man.
I gotta get away from here.
'Cause I know them all.
I know who to get it from
and who not to get it from.
Jon: Yeah.
And I know if I go ask 'em,
if I, if I was
to have the money,
they'll give it to me
right there.
They don't care.
Jon: All right.
Let's get outta here, Deliris.
Yes.
Rob: I broke up with my girl.
Well, yeah, she left.
You know,
'cause we argue every day.
Anyway.
Hello, Mr. Mahoney?
Yeah, this is Rob.
I gotta speak to you.
Can you come over the house?
Okay, bye.
He said he'll see me in a bit.
- Jon: Who?
- Rob: My parole officer.
Jon: Why?
Because I wanna tell him
what happened, you know.
You know, 'cause it's
shit like that,
that, you know,
makes people do drugs.
You broke up with your woman.
It happens all the time.
Now, you gotta learn
how to deal with it
without goin' back
to your drugs, your alcohol,
or doing your crap
that you did before.
And I'm glad you contacted me
'cause that's important.
You know, you let me know
what's goin' on,
I'll come over,
make sure everything's...
At first,
I thought it was nothin'.
Why should I tell you,
it's nothin', but...
- Yeah, but...
- That is somethin' 'cause that could make me use.
Yeah. Somethin' on your mind.
You're hooked up with somebody,
and all of a sudden it ends.
You know, you get thinkin'.
But, you know,
give it a couple days,
see how you feel.
That said,
maybe you guys go back,
maybe you won't.
But if you don't,
then you just move on
and just continue the way
you've been livin',
which has been, uh,
clean and sober.
And, uh, you've been
on the right track.
- Are you Freddie?
- Freddie: Yes.
Officer Raquel Shafran:
Freddie? Wilfredo? What?
- Freddie: Freddie.
- Officer Shafran: Okay. Come in.
How's your health?
I mean, here he had
that you didn't feel well.
Freddie: I don't feel well.
I'm goin' through
a lot of pain every night.
Starts like...
4:00 or 5:00,
5 o'clock in the evening.
Cramps, stomach.
- My son...
- Mm-hmm.
He's going to this thing
called the Twilight,
- school at night...
- Okay.
Because he got caught
with a gun or robbery,
- some store. Okay?
- Okay.
And they don't
teach him nothin'.
And I wanted to know
if you can give me permission
to go to Newburgh, New York,
so I can go to the school
and see if I can arrange it
so I can get him back
in regular school.
Principal:
So I'll be right there.
You heard him. There you go.
He'll be in a second.
Mr. Rodriguez, how you doin'?
Martin LaMaza, principal.
Wilfredo.
We're gonna go over
to the office on this side
and we'll cover the material
that we're gonna discuss.
Excuse me, sir.
Just go through, uh...
Give me just
a little bit of, uh,
of background
on the fact that you,
you haven't been
with-with Wilfredo for a while.
And now, you're here
to help us out.
Well, ten years ago,
I committed a crime,
armed robbery, to be exact.
And, um, I went
to prison for ten years.
So when I, like,
left my son, he was, like,
real small at the time.
And, um...
I actually didn't see him
till, like, now, you know.
So I really didn't,
didn't raise him.
But, um, I spent
ten years in prison,
so I kinda, like,
know what prison's like.
And I got out,
and I don't want him
to take the same route I took
and end up in the same place
where I ended up at.
Jon: So, Deliris,
clean or not clean?
Clean.
Jon: Guarantee? Look me,
look me in the eye. Look.
- Clean?
- Clean.
I swear to God
I seen her shoot up.
You and the Black guy.
You went first
and he went second.
She did it in her right arm.
Jon: You got that?
Let's see the sleeve, Deliris.
- Let's see.
- Deliris: Hmm?
Jon: Right arm. Let's see
the right arm, Deliris.
Wait till we get
around the corner.
Yeah, she's high right now.
Man, can't you look
at a person eyes
and tell when their pupils
are dilated and stuff like that?
She's high for real.
I wanna see your right arm.
It was from a blood test.
Jon: Oh, let me see.
Kiky: Let me see your left arm.
Let's see your left arm.
What's that over there?
Move it this way.
- Deliris: Tape.
- No, this right here.
What's this right here?
Deliris: Oh, that's been there.
Jon: Deliris, they know
what track marks are?
Yeah. I used to have 'em.
If you do drugs one more time,
I can't live with you.
So you have to do this,
go back on drugs
or don't be with me.
Deliris: Bingo.
This is what kills you,
fuckin' drugs.
Jon: Rob?
- Yeah?
- Jon: What's happenin'? What...
The store is closin'.
It should be closed on the 15th,
but they'll probably
close a lot sooner
because they're
running out of merchandise.
Jon: What about your job?
I don't know. I don't know
if they're gonna keep me or not.
I gotta talk to the manager
when she comes.
She'll be here in about
an hour or somethin'.
Jon: Jesus Christ.
Wow, look at this.
Then I'm gonna have to go
look for another job, right?
- No.
- No?
We'll keep you here.
And then when this store closes,
you'll end up going
to another Eckerd
because we don't wanna
put you on the street.
Oh. Yeah, I told you, Jon.
Eckerd ain't just gonna
put people on the street.
Jon: Why-why you gonna keep him?
'Cause he's
a good worker. He's...
There's no reason
for him to leave.
He's never done anything wrong.
They're gonna keep Rob.
Rob will not be unemployed.
- Jon: Rob.
- What's up?
Jon: You're smokin'.
Yeah, I started smokin' again.
I was doin' good. 146 days.
- I quit like that.
- Jon: Yeah.
Now, for the past week,
I've been smokin'.
But I'm gonna stop again.
Jon: Where are we goin' now?
There's this place
that helps you get jobs.
- Jon: A job? What...
- Yeah.
Yeah, I got fired from Eckerd.
I told you.
- Jon: You got fired?
- I got fired.
They called me in the day
before yesterday, right?
- Jon: Yeah.
- Because, um...
the assistant manager
knew my background.
And she didn't say nothin'
for the whole year.
Then all of a sudden,
she tells the district manager.
Then they said, "All right,
we have to let you go."
Jon: And this place?
This place helps you find a job,
- and they're good.
- Jon: Yeah?
My parole officer
called the guy.
I got an appointment
with Lanney.
Okay? Only smoked half.
You can take a seat,
fill this out.
When you're done, I'll get Mike.
He'll interview you. Okay?
"Have you ever been
convicted of a felony
in the last seven years?"
What should I do? Lie?
Now, I got child support.
Matter of fact,
I bring the letters
in case you need to see it.
And I'm saying, you know,
I honestly been thinking
about telling you,
send me back, man, 'cause...
Officer Shafran: $50 a month?
Freddie: Yes.
Officer Shafran: That's
what you're crying about?
$50 a month?
Freddie: Well, it's, you
know, it's not just that...
Officer Shafran:
That's not a lot of money.
You know, every...
you know, it's not just that.
You know, if it was that...
if that was all I had to pay,
I'd be fine with that.
Officer Shafran: This is life.
If you can't live with this,
you're gonna have
a lot of problems.
When everybody's
hittin' me left and right,
you know what I'm sayin'?
I'll be like, I'm confused.
I'm saying... I'm not...
I'm not even used to bein' out.
You're not staying
down here, are you?
- Rob: No.
- I hope not.
I'm... I don't wanna
stay in Newark.
Officer: No, I don't blame you.
That's where you get
all your trouble from.
Yeah.
Let me show you Rob's picture,
if I still have it.
- Jon: That you, Rob?
- Rob: Yeah, it's me.
Officer: She was just in
here, too, not too long ago.
- Rob: Deliris.
- Officer: She was just in here.
Officer 2: How about a
Polaroid, a goodbye Polaroid?
- Yeah, a group picture.
- Officer 2: A goodbye Polaroid?
Oh, a group picture.
Rob: A good picture.
I'm not standing there.
I'm not a criminal.
I'm not a criminal.
I'm not standing there.
I'll stand in the middle.
- Man 1: Come on, Robert.
- Man 2: Ready?
"Life of Crime," part six.
No flash.
- All that shit for nothin'.
- I got film. I got film.
- Officer: Take care of yourself.
- Rob: All right.
Bye-bye.
Jon: So what do you think, John?
Does he have a shot?
Yeah, he has a shot.
As long as he doesn't
go back to Newark,
go out, hang with the same guys
that got him in trouble
to begin with,
he's got a shot.
Jon: How big a shot? This big?
Little bigger. About 50/50 here.
That's what it is. As long
as he doesn't come back here.
That's the whole thing.
You can't come back to this town
to hang out with the same guys
that got you in trouble.
And you're gonna
wind up in trouble.
- Rob: Hey, Deliris.
- Oh, man.
So you still gettin' high?
A little bit.
But you're not addicted, right?
Shit.
Why don't you stop?
I'm clean so far.
- So far.
- So far.
I ain't fuckin' around no more.
Shit, I don't even steal, man.
I ain't doin' nothin'.
- Deliris: This is my home.
- Jon: Yeah?
Deliris: Temporarily.
Robert, this is Ruben.
Ruben, Robert.
Rob: Hey, I remember that.
When you was younger, huh?
Deliris: Yep, high school.
Rob: You could still
look like that again.
Stop doin' drugs.
I know. I want to.
That's it. You can
go to a detox, right?
- Deliris: Uh-huh.
- And, um...
and get clean.
And as soon as you come
back out on the street,
you're gonna start using again.
Remember when you went
to the drug program
and you got, you know,
like nice and plump and fat?
- Deliris: Mm-hmm.
- Rob: You was lookin' good.
You had quit smokin', right?
- Mm-hmm.
- Rob: But...
you see how positive
you was then?
But I bet you wasn't going
to meetings or nothin'.
And eventually
you started usin' drugs, right?
Deliris: Yep.
I'll see ya.
- Nice seein' you.
- Okay. Ruben, right?
Okay, Ruben.
- Nice seeing you again.
- You better stop.
- I need to.
- Rob: Okay.
Jon: Freddie. What is goin' on?
Life is goin' on.
The same old life.
Officer Shafran: I'm havin'
problems with Freddie.
He hasn't been reporting
like he's supposed to.
Right now,
I have no idea where he is.
He's probably
not staying at home
'cause he knows
that I'm going out there.
I'm gonna go
pick him up if he's there.
I have no choice but to issue
a warrant for Freddie.
Who knows what he's capable of
doing out there in the streets.
Freddie: ♪ New York, New
York, it's a wonderful... ♪
Jon: Freddie, if-if you
don't turn yourself in,
I think you'd die on the street.
Well, either way,
if I don't die on the street,
where am I gonna die, in prison?
I've been on the run now for,
what, two days, three days?
And, uh it's been rough.
It's not, it's not easy,
you know.
'Cause...
I can't go to my family's house.
Where else am I supposed to go?
Backin' up into this alley
because I'm gonna shoot me
some dope in the car.
Get the sickness off me.
I let everybody down.
I let myself down mainly.
Shit.
Jon: What are you doin'?
Puttin' my bags
in the fuckin' car.
- Jon: Where are you goin'?
- Back to Jersey, I guess.
Jon: And? To do what?
I don't know.
Find another place to go to.
Jon:
You better turn yourself in.
No, not now. Not today.
Jon: That means you're
gonna get high again, right?
Obviously.
What can I do, Jon?
I'm sick.
Jon: You gotta have the courage
to turn yourself in, Freddie.
It's a question
of courage. Right?
If you go out on the street
and get high again,
you're gonna die.
You're not gonna make it.
I don't know, Jon.
I don't know what to do, man.
- Rob: This is Gator.
- I'm Gator.
Rob: This is my roommate.
I let him move in like
about four months ago.
He helps me pay the rent.
You know what I mean?
Gator was drug-free.
When he moved in,
I told him he couldn't
mess with drugs
and this and that.
- You know, "You gotta go to AA."
- Jon: Uh-huh.
And then what happened, Gator?
Came back,
started playing
with the drugs again
and, uh, well,
I got my habit back,
but I'm tryin'
to get clean again.
Rob's helping me
out with that, so...
- Jon: What's the habit?
- Heroin.
- Jon: How much?
- I'm doing right now
about two bags a day, but...
Picked up
a couple of my buddies.
You know, scorpion.
It's not bad. It's...
That's the same empty bag
you left the other day,
scorpio or scorp...
Gator: This here ain't
gonna bother you, is it?
- Rob: Don't bother me.
- Gator: Okay.
'Cause, you know,
I don't wanna see you
go back out there 'cause...
Rob: I quit.
I stopped.
I didn't quit. I stopped.
Let me see
if I get tempted, Jon.
Gator: You hear that sound?
That's like, mm. It's coming in.
Rob: Don't bother me, Jon.
Don't bother me at all.
Freddie:
I'm on my fucking way to jail.
I'm supposed to
be there at 3:30.
What time is it? It's 3:51.
I still haven't even got
my fuckin' dick sucked.
That's gonna take
another half hour.
Psst.
How much money you got?
I don't know. You gonna shoot
me up if I get the coke?
- Freddie: Yeah, hell, yeah.
- All right.
And you know
I don't have any veins.
You're gonna have
to go in my neck.
No problem.
Woman: You fuckin' spic.
I'll be outside, 'cause
my boyfriend don't want me...
I don't want him
to think that, you know...
See, I wanna...
to suck my fuckin' dick.
I can't do it, man, 'cause...
Freddie: Fuckin' girl, man.
She's gonna get
all fuckin' coked up.
- Woman: Fuckin'...
- Freddie: Let me check on that side, huh?
I don't see shit.
Damn, I can't...
see shit out there.
It's too small.
I'm gonna blow up.
Wanna get that?
It's small, mami.
Ow, ow, ow.
Okay, don't move.
Don't move right there.
Just hold it right there.
- All the way, right?
- Check back.
- Go back? All the way?
- Woman: Yeah.
Okay. Don't fuckin'
go out on me, mami.
I won't.
Freddie: Your heart starts beatin'
fuckin' thousand miles an hour.
Now put this shit in.
- Okay.
- Take it out.
- Take it out, Freddie.
- It's done.
See, I ain't even
get my fuckin' dick sucked
'cause
Wait. Let me put my shit on.
Let me put my shit on, Fred.
My boyfriend's there.
Freddie: Sleepin' pills.
I'm packin' 'em so that way
I take 'em to the county jail
'cause I can't sleep at night.
That's exactly
what I'm doin'. Bah-bah.
The only way I'm gonna be
able to sleep at night, kid.
Jon: Who taught you
how to do that stuff, Freddie?
You learn this shit in prison.
Man.
It's hurtin'.
That's just too bad now.
- Hold on a second. Hold on a second.
- Freddie: Come on.
Man: Freddie, have a seat in
this chair right here, okay?
Officer Shafran: Just relax.
- I got it.
- Yeah.
Freddie: Don't ever think
you got it in the bag
like I thought I had it.
There's nobody
in the world could tell me
that they get clean
and stop usin'.
And I don't care if it's
10, 15 years from now,
they do it one time,
they gonna do it every day.
That shit is unstoppable, man.
Officer Shafran: So in the end,
I guess it is a successful story
just 'cause you
turned yourself in today.
It'll be successful if when
I max out, I'm still livin'.
That's when it'll be successful.
He'll be comfortable here.
Tomorrow morning,
they'll close the coffin up
and take him to church.
That's about it.
Detective Al DiNatale:
I'm Detective Al DiNatale,
Trenton Police Department.
- How you doin', Al?
- How you doin'?
- Officer Mahoney: Good.
- I'm gonna walk you through
the scene here and, uh,
let you know
exactly what we found.
Rob was found
laying on the floor over here
with his head up
against the refrigerator.
If you look down here,
you'll see the syringe needle
next to his left leg.
Officer Mahoney: This was
gonna be a success story.
We felt he
straightened himself out.
Obviously, it didn't
work out that way.
- Waste of life.
- Officer Mahoney: Yeah.
Coroner: We have here a body
of 41-years-old Robert Steffey,
found at home in a state of
full bloat decomposition,
found with a syringe present
in his left inner elbow.
One hundred positive
that his cause of death
is as a result of his
one-time shot of heroin.
The heroin that was found
in his system was very pure?
Coroner: Yes.
A hot shot, which would be
a shot that you will die from,
is the ultimate high.
And the gentleman or person
who sold him this shot
will be the hot person
on the street,
the dealer that
everyone is looking for.
They wanna buy from him
because this gentleman
supposedly got
the ultimate high.
Officer Mahoney:
He knew what he was doin'.
He knew heroin
got him in prison before,
got him in trouble,
now got him dead.
That's a sad ending
to the life of Robert Steffey.
Don't shoot dope...
'cause you're gonna end up
in the morgue.
Host: I wanna introduce
you the Mistress of Honor,
who's an absolute
unadulterated miracle...
Man: Right here. Right here.
Host: Let's hear it for Deliris.
Our sister.
Deliris: My name is Deliris,
and I'm a grateful,
blessed recovering addict.
All: Hey, Deliris.
I love my recovery today.
Let me tell ya I was born
and raised in Newark.
I have three beautiful kids.
I graduated from high school.
I went to college.
I had a job
with the City of Newark.
The drugs stole
all that from me.
For 17 years, I shot drugs.
When I OD'ed in my room,
nobody knew where I was at.
All I wanted to do was die.
And you know what?
A voice told me,
"Help yourself,
that I will help you."
And ever since, I've been clean.
If I could do it,
anybody could do it.
That's all I can say.
Host: If Deliris can do it?
All: I can do it!
Host: If Deliris can do it?
All: I can do it!
Host: If Deliris can do it?
All: I can do it!
Deliris: Today is Mother's Day.
I've had a long day today,
but at least
she keeps me company.
It's my first Mother's Day
without my mother.
She passed away
in July of last year.
In the old days
when I used to feel like this,
I used to just go get high
and don't feel nothin'.
'Cause that's what
people do with drugs.
They use drugs
so they won't feel pain.
And I did that
for a lot of years.
My mother was more a mother
to my kids than I was.
I'm not with my kids today
because there's still
pain with them.
Jon, you remember me?
I'm Kiky. I'm, uh, now 32.
Last time you saw me, I believe
was about eight or nine.
And I'm definitely not
the same person.
Not at all.
I'm happy with my life now,
I'm tryin' to pick up
the pieces now.
I wanna focus on me,
focus on my passions,
my dreams, my goals,
like those other things
I have in front of me.
And those are the things
I'm gonna succeed in one day.
Deliris:
This is my oldest son, Charlie.
Jon:
Those are the guys that used to
lock your mother up
all the time, Charlie.
I know, we playin' against 'em.
- Jon: Really?
- Newark PD.
Hey, guys. My name is Deliris.
Um...
I used to be
a heavy drug addict,
and I was in and outta jail,
in and outta jail
'cause of my addiction.
But I thank God
that he rescued me
and today I have 12 years clean.
- Congratulations.
- Deliris: Thank you.
Officer: Glad you're out here.
We're glad to have you.
- Deliris: Thank you.
- All right.
Players: Oh!
They know police gonna
whip their ass.
Hey, Deliris.
Deliris, this game is won
on and off the field,
but you're the real winner.
All right?
- Thank you.
- All right.
I get to take a picture
with Newark Police Department
instead of being in a lineup.
- Jon: Ta-da!
- All right, guys. Thank you.
Thank you.
Deliris: That's the projects
that they closed down.
They found too many
bodies in there.
This is Pennington Court.
I ran around here
looking for drugs.
Now I try to help
people get clean.
What's goin' on, Jodi?
- Hey, how you doin'?
- Hi.
Deliris: I remember you
was just a little kid.
You was here with Rob
when he was still alive,
during the film.
I'm hope in a good way.
We came here today to see you,
to see what we could do for you.
But it's up to you.
I can't force you.
Okay?
All right, let me get a hug.
- Stay strong, okay?
- I sure will.
Jodi, I'm gonna go see
if I see somebody
that needs help, okay?
- You take care now. Okay.
- You, too.
I remember you.
I've been homeless
over, over 30 years.
I need help.
Deliris: What happened?
What happened?
I made a mistake with my life.
And I can't get no help.
Deliris: I'll try to
get you into a program.
Just don't give up.
Don't give up.
I know this guy right here.
I used to sell him drugs.
Yeah.
When are you gonna get clean?
I was tryin' to get clean.
I was clean for a good while
except then I got hurt again.
I'm not on the needles
and stuff like that.
Once in a while,
I had a little...
I'm glad I'm not on that.
I'm gonna pray for you, okay?
Prayer do, do work.
- Okay.
- Deliris: All right.
- You take care now.
- Okay.
Thank you.
Deliris: It never stops.
Woman: Deliris, it is
my distinct pleasure
to recognize you today.
Deliris is such
a strong role model to many.
So, Deliris,
from sick and suffering
to a strong survivor,
you are a miracle.
God bless you.
Deliris: My main purpose
is to help another addict
get clean like I did,
because we can only keep
what we have by giving it away.
And I'm so grateful
that I'm alive today
because it was me
and two other guys.
And both of them
overdosed on drugs.
I'm the only one
that's left today alive.
And if Deliris can do it,
I can do it too!
If Deliris can do it?
All: I can do it!
If Deliris can do it?
All: I can do it!
This is my daughter Kiky.
This is Cayden,
my six-year-old grandson.
Charlie, my oldest son...
Thank you.
Deliris:
and my oldest grandson.
- I love you. I'm proud of you.
- Deliris: I love you.
I knew you could do it, Ma.
Good job.
- Love you.
- Love you, too.
All right, let's do this.
Woman: This was her baby.
Chimo: I want people to remember
my mother for her energy,
and all the positivity she had,
and wanting to help others.
I'm proud of my mother. She
changed her life around, a lot.
Gotta be with family.
Gotta keep it up.
Kiky:
When people think of my mother,
I want them to remember
that recovery's possible.
She did it
for the past 13 years.
And she helped
as many people as she can.
Kiky:
I'll never stop loving you.
Yep.
Celebrant: Hail Mary, full of
grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed are thou amongst women
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners
now and at the hour
of our death. Amen.
Chimo: She was able to tell her story.
Not many could do that.
She fought really hard.
And I just wish
I would have known
that it was so long
that she was fighting
for someone to talk to
with everything going on
with this COVID virus.
I had no idea
it's been three months
that she didn't have a meeting
or someone to talk to
that understood her
on that level.
As a child,
I was always embarrassed.
But now as an adult,
everyone has their story,
and I loved her very much.
I really did, and I always
will love my mother.
Kiky: She was an amazing woman.
She's helped so many people.
I will always
carry you in my heart.
I love you always, Mom.
ten times in the eye.
You better watch it
with that damn knife.
Eee.
3D.
I'm gonna rob everything
I can get my hands on.
Put the camera away, okay?
Deliris Vasquez: That's before
I started using drugs.
I went to two years in college,
and that's when I met
my ex-husband
and that's when
I started using drugs.
Jon Alpert:
Tell me what you're gonna do.
What are you guys gonna do?
We're goin' to the store,
we're gonna try to...
- Jon: That store over there?
- Yeah.
Yeah, store over there.
We're gonna try to, um, load up.
Jon: What are you lookin' for?
Anything...
- Mike McGrath: Make some money.
- Yeah.
Jon: And if you get caught?
Go to jail.
Rob: I have to go to work.
That one. This one.
Eight sets of sheets.
That lady is from Harrison.
Mike: She knows me. Forget it.
Rob: Get the fuck outta here.
Jon: You're really good.
What's he doin'?
He's distractin' them?
Mike: Yeah, he's comin' out now.
There he is.
- Jon: Yeah?
- Yeah.
Job well done.
Uh, we got, um, sets of sheets.
I can make about $80 here.
Beats the minimum wage.
Jon: Were you afraid you were
gonna get caught in there?
I'm always afraid.
- But... the baby gotta eat.
- Mike: It's a chance you gotta take.
I gotta eat.
The rent gotta be paid.
Man: Hey.
Freddie Rodriguez:
One, two, three, four, five.
Protection. Never know.
Watch, watch.
I wanna speak. I wanna speak.
Man: Dance...
Aah!
Jon: Is it gonna be
hard to sell this stuff?
No. No, no. Not at all.
- Jon: Uh-huh.
- Rob: Easy.
Jon: Where you gonna take it?
- Gonna take it to a store down here.
- Mike: To a fence.
- Jon: Uh-huh.
- That's queen size.
- Let's go. Put it in the bag.
- We'll see you later.
Man: Yeah, yeah.
Rob: Ten dollars is cheap.
- That's queen size.
- Man: It's the big ones.
Rob: Let me see the money?
- Real money.
- Woman: What is that?
Rob: Let's go, Mike.
We didn't really make that much.
- Here, here's your half.
- Rob: The only...
- Jon: How much did it sell for?
- Mike: Take that right there.
Well, the thing that happened,
I-I didn't wanna waste time,
like, goin' around,
'cause I coulda made $80.
But sometime it happen
that you just gotta
give it away, 50 bucks.
- We lost $30...
- We sold 'em for 50 bucks.
But we didn't wanna waste time
'cause that time is money.
- Angela: You got your keys?
- Yeah.
About time you cleaned.
Real funny.
Jon: Robbie, who's everybody here?
Who is who?
Turn around.
This is Angela, my girl.
- Jon: Uh-huh.
- It's my father Ed.
Glad to meet ya.
- Jon: Hi, Dad, how you doin'?
- All right.
My father works.
How much you make?
How much you make an hour, Ed?
Four dollars and ten cents
an hour.
Rob: How much you bring
home at the end of the week?
- Eighty dollars a week.
- Ed Steffey: A week.
- Jon: Yeah? Yeah?
- Peanuts.
You have to make extra money
some way, survive.
Jon: You know what your
son does to make money?
Yep, I know.
Jon:
And what do you think about it?
I don't like the idea.
- Jon: No?
- Nope.
Rob: This is my man.
Just got outta jail.
Did 60 days in jail.
Jon: Yeah?
For what?
Uh, for possession, cocaine.
He's my original teacher.
He's the best.
Number one.
I don't like to brag,
you know, but...
We're goin' into the store,
get the stuff and come out.
Nobody see us go in,
nobody see us come out.
- Jon: What-what's in the box?
- Rob: Shirts.
Jon: How much you gonna
sell that for, you think?
I don't know what it's worth.
I don't want nobody
get my plate, man.
Jon: Just like that?
- Just like that.
- Just like that.
I don't know what's in there.
Jon: But wait, there was about
five people watchin' you.
- Ain't nothin'.
- Jon: Huh?
Anybody got the plate?
Anybody got the plate?
You know who's been watchin'.
Nah, don't worry about that.
Rob: These are bad shirts.
Tiger.
Well, you can't be perfect
when you steal everything.
- Hey, you could use them for pajamas.
- Rob: Look at that.
Got a zipper.
I'm givin' away free shirts.
Man: Still got some shirts.
Hey, over here! Over here!
These are so nice.
Can I have it?
Rob: The stuff that
we threw away before,
everybody's pickin' it
out the garbage.
- Jon: Now, listen. Would you give this stuff...
- We always give stuff out.
Jon: Would you give this stuff
away if I wasn't filmin'?
Yeah, we always do.
Don't believe him.
This is his first time.
- Jon: First time, huh?
- In history.
Jon: The first time. The first.
I'm always givin'...
I always been
givin' stuff around.
When I can't sell it...
You know,
but I always give shit away.
This is my family.
This is my little baby,
little girl, Elizabeth.
This is my lady, Mari.
Jon: How long you been together?
Freddie: About a year
and a half, two years.
Jon: Yeah?
Well, Mari,
did you know what, uh,
Freddie's occupation was
when you met him the first time?
Yeah.
I'm not gonna work
for $150 a week
when I could make $150 a day.
You know what I mean?
Jon: Are you worried
that they might grow up
and get into
the same type of life?
Yeah.
Freddie: I don't want 'em
to do what I do
because I know what I've
been through, you know.
I wouldn't want them
to be like this, you know.
Jon: Yeah.
So I don't wanna teach 'em
how to steal and shit
like that, you know.
I want 'em to get, go to school
and get good jobs
and shit, you know.
I'm planning on
stopping but, um...
it's not that easy.
I'm addicted to shopliftin'.
Jon: How much did he miss me by?
I'd say about an inch.
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
Angela: Oh, my God.
♪ Ha... ♪
Mike: You get a birthday cake.
That's your present.
Jon:
Whose birthday? Your birthday?
- Mike: Ange's birthday.
- Jon: Aw.
Mike: Old Aunt Ange.
Cut it open, look.
Motherfucker cost me
$20 of stolen money.
Shit. Shit.
Rob: Look what I gave
Ange for her birthday.
Photo book. Cost $20...
Mike: The cake I had paid for...
- I bought it.
- Jon: Yeah?
I bought it with money.
- Jon: Congratulations.
- Earned money.
Mike: Right? Huh?
Get the fuck in here.
Get in here.
Now, answer
this man's questions.
Woman: Happy birthday.
This is my, my girl
who got my baby down there.
- Jon: What?
- Mike: That's right.
That is a paycheck.
Rob: Not yours.
Mike: That's a paycheck.
My girl works hard.
Jon: She works and
gives you all the money?
- Right.
- She doesn't give it to me.
- We share it.
- Rob: Now...
now, he ain't gotta
shoplift no more.
Mike: We share it, you know.
Kid: Oh!
You better shut the fuck up.
Mike's girlfriend:
'Cause you know you're wrong.
Oh, my God. Please.
Mike: Now shut the fuck up.
Told you. You keep
our problems to us.
You don't go screamin' 'em out
in front of everybody.
I'll kill you, bitch.
Jon:
What are you fightin' about?
'Cause she's hardheaded
and don't listen,
and she's gotta learn to listen.
Rob:
Well, you ain't gotta hit her.
Yes, I do.
'Cause that's the only way
you concentrate...
- Mike's girlfriend: Rob, would you listen...
- You better shut up.
I told you.
I... Get in that hole.
Get back in that hole.
Get in there.
No. Please, Michael.
Get in there.
Now, you get back in there...
Rob: Forget your troubles.
Come on, be happy.
And stay in there
with the door closed.
Get the cat off the bed
-'cause it got fleas.
- Mike's girlfriend: Wait, it's hurt.
It's hurt, Michael.
You're gonna be hurt
in a minute.
Fuck the cat.
Jon: Well, do they fight all
the time like this or not?
Who?
Jon: Mike and his girl?
Kid: Every night.
One time with a bat. Pssh.
Jon: He hit her with a bat?
Remember on the lake?
I try to stay
outta their business.
I just...
He told me that she wanted $50
to give to her mother.
But she wanted $50 to give
to her mother to hold for her
so she has enough
for an abortion.
Mike don't want
to have an abortion.
That's why he hit her.
She's tryin' to be sneaky.
All right, lock the door.
Lock the door!
Jon: The first time he hit
you, what did you say to him?
Mike's girlfriend: That he
better never hit me again.
He cried and he promised me
he'd never hit me again.
He did it again and again
and again and again.
And that's it.
I'm not taking no more.
He can't beat love out of me
'cause he don't know
how to handle love.
Jon: And what are you
gonna do with yourself
when you get outta here?
Mike's girlfriend:
Get rid of this baby.
I ain't crazy.
Whoever's watchin' this,
don't think I'm crazy
'cause I ain't
this fuckin' stupid.
We've only been
going out two months,
and I ain't gotta take
this shit from him.
Freddie and Rob: ♪ I want
to wake up in the morning ♪
♪ At the good old
Caldwell Jail ♪
♪ Where the sun comes peepin'
into where I'm sleepin' ♪
♪ And the songbirds
singin' away ♪
♪ I wanna wonder... ♪
Rob: Over here.
Freddie: There's nobody here.
I'll get the suitcase.
Suitcase.
Rob: Excuse me. Can you
take this thing over here?
Guess you want to take a picture
of what's inside, don't you?
- Pass out some money.
- So $170's, uh...
- $170, $170...
- $80... $80...
$80, $85, $82.50 apiece.
$80.
$20, $40, $60, $80.
Rob: Puttin' away
$100 for today.
I had $200,
now I got $300 saved.
Probably be for my bail anyway.
Don't pay doin'. I'm serious.
I go out and make money,
I put it away.
It happens all the time.
I get busted, gotta use
all the money for bail.
Jon: Ange, if you could
wish for one thing,
what would you like to have?
Angela: If there's one
thing I could wish for?
Jon: Yeah.
Not no money.
To get married,
which somebody
can't use their brains for.
Jon: Wait. Oh, you're not
really married, married?
Angela: No.
Jon: I didn't know.
What took you back
to the streets, Rob?
'Cause you were doin' good here.
Uh, because...
It wasn't payin' enough.
They wasn't payin' enough.
Sid: Yeah, but you
were doin' good.
You had over a grand
in the bank.
Over a grand in the bank.
You were doin' good, Robbie.
Rob: Now, I ain't got
nothin' in the bank.
That's what I'm sayin'.
- Now, what you're doin'...
- Don't pay.
You don't have anything.
Now what I do,
I just make enough money
to put gas in my car every day,
buy a little food,
pay a little bills.
- I ain't got no next...
- Another thing.
You were happier, too,
when you worked.
You came down here every day
and you showed me your bank book
and you were happy about it.
Of course I was happy.
- Yeah, 'cause it was legit.
- Because I said,
"Sid, I got money, I earned it."
That's right. Well, you worked...
You know what I was
thinkin' about, Sid?
If I, like, get some money
together just to buy, like,
a big hot dog truck
just to start me off.
How you gonna get
the money for that?
Got any rich uncles?
- Any rich friends?
- Nobody.
Are you askin' me for the money?
You probably don't got it.
If you're gonna do right,
I'd give you the money.
I'd find a way.
Jon: Boy, this is a nice
little town here, Freddie.
I know.
Jon: How come you
always go to the suburbs
to-to do your robbing?
Because they don't have
that much security, you know.
If, um, anybody
chases you, you know,
it's easier to get away,
you know.
There ain't too many people.
You know, it's more simple.
It's more easier.
- Jon: What's this?
- R&S Strauss.
- Jon: Yeah.
- They sell auto parts.
It's come off.
Jon: How many times
you been in there?
Oh, couldn't even count,
so many.
I usually park my car
right here on the side,
leave it like this,
leave the keys in there,
and go in there and come out.
Jon: Tell me what you got.
Freddie: I got a burglar
alarm to stop thieves.
- Jon: That's what you stole?
- Yeah.
Yeah, I stole a couple of 'em.
I got a couple of 'em
in the trunk.
See, I'm... I've been arrested
for stolen cars before.
And I, and they givin' out
too much time,
so I'm tryin' to stop thieves.
Jon: What is this here, Freddie,
on your back? It says what?
Freddie: Perdon madre mia.
Jon: What's that mean?
Freddie:
"Forgive me, mother of mine."
Did that when I was
a juvenile 'cause I was...
I felt sorry, you know,
for my mother for...
I was always havin' her
suffer and whatnot, you know.
Jon: Yeah?
My mother and father
got divorced when we were young.
They put me in foster home.
Some white lady and white man,
they were pretty old,
they adopted me
and my oldest brother Frankie.
We lived with those people
for about a year.
My mother was goin' to court,
tryin' to get us back.
If I would've stayed there
with those rich folks,
I wouldn't be here right now,
I wouldn't be doin' this.
I always think about that.
I wish I would've stayed.
They would've
sent me to college.
I would've been a good boy.
I would've been, you know...
would've made
somethin' out my life.
Jackie.
Jackie, go like this.
Jon: What are you gonna do if
you ever catch your daughter
doin' anything bad?
- Whip her ass.
- Jon: Yeah?
She looked at me.
- She ain't gonna do nothin' bad.
- Did you ever spank him?
Yep.
Jon: You ever beat him up
when he did anything bad?
Yeah, he got a fork in my arm.
- Jon: Huh?
- A fork.
Jon: He stabbed you with a fork?
Rob: Yeah, I was
about five years old.
I had a box of toys.
This motherfucker
takes boxes of toys,
throwin' it down the furnace.
Jon: Why? Why would he
throw your toys out?
'Cause he was drunk.
- What do you gotta say about that?
- I wasn't drunk.
You was always drunk.
- Jon: Hey, Freddie.
- Freddie: Yeah?
Jon: Where'd everybody go?
Where is everybody?
My lady left.
She left me.
She went over
her mother's house.
Jon: Why?
I don't know.
I guess she got tired of me.
Jon: Is that a note
that she left you?
What's it say?
I don't know.
I think it says, uh...
"I'm sorry. I love you."
Somethin' like that.
I don't know.
I just feel down and out.
I don't know what to do.
I feel like goin' back to drugs.
And, um, I feel
like killin' myself.
I don't know what to do, man.
I don't know
what I'm gonna do with my life.
I keep doin' this shit, man.
I don't wanna get high
because I wanna do good.
And I can't do good
with problems on my mind.
This shit, man.
I do wanna straighten out, man.
Jon:
You got anybody you can talk to?
Anybody who's not
a drug addict, not a thief?
All my friends
are drug addicts and thieves.
Ain't got no straight friends.
You know that.
Rob: I got a girl
to take out tonight.
It's all right
if I take her, Ange?
Jon: You don't get jealous
when he's got other girls...
Yeah, I can't say nothin'.
- Jon: Why not?
- He'd be cursin' me up and down.
He was like,
"You don't pay rent."
Now, you can't say that...
I love to have loads of women.
Jon:
What are you gonna do, Ange,
if he brings another girl
back in here?
Yeah, my nerves
are gonna go then.
- Jon: Do you want to introduce me, Rob?
- Yeah.
- Hi.
- This is my girl.
- Jon: Hey. How you doin'?
- Deliris.
- Jon: Uh-huh.
- That's her baby.
- Jon: Let me see.
- The baby.
Hey, hey, hey.
- What's up?
- Look at the birdy.
Mike: Let's move.
What do you,
what do you expect for $300?
It's not supposed to
start perfect all the time.
- Jon: All right.
- Later, Jon.
Jon: I'll see you, guys.
Have a nice night.
- Same to you.
- Jon: You're not takin' me along, huh? Robert.
- Huh?
- Jon: You're not takin' me along?
- You along?
- Jon: Yeah.
- I wanna be alone.
- Jon: Oh, I'm-I'm sorry.
- Yeah, I wanna be alone.
- All right.
- All right, take care.
- Jon: We'll see ya.
All right.
Jon: Don't get in
too much trouble.
No, I stay out of trouble.
You know me.
Jon: All right.
As your name is called,
please answer, "Here."
Thank you.
Michael W. McGrath.
Lawyer: No answer.
I have no idea
where Michael McGrath is.
I haven't talked to him yet.
They gotta find me.
They... I'm not...
Listen. I put it like this.
I don't care if I
go to jail, all right?
But I'm not gonna go
and turn myself in
so they can just lock me
the fuck up right there.
Let 'em find me first.
You know what I mean?
No appearance. Mr. Prosecutor,
do you have a motion?
Prosecutor: Yes, Your Honor.
The State would move
for a bench warrant
and forfeiture of bail.
Very well. Bench
warrant will issue
for the arrest of
Michael W. McGrath,
and whatever bail posted
will be forfeited.
What can I do?
It's up to him, not me.
Jon: But you're gonna lose
the money that you put up.
How much did you put up? $600?
- $750.
- Jon: Yeah.
$750 I put up.
- I don't know.
- Jon: Well, did you know
that he wasn't
gonna show up today?
No, I didn't.
Had no idea.
- Jon: Do you know where he is?
- Nope.
I don't.
That's all the questions
you're gettin' outta me.
Jon: Okay, but he
just cost you $750.
Yep.
Kid wants to go on the run,
that's his business, not mine.
Jon: Yeah.
So what are you gonna do?
- What am I gonna do?
- Jon: Yeah.
I don't know.
Jon: You got half of
Newark lookin' for you.
- I'll move outta Newark.
- Jon: Yeah?
I'll move to the half
that ain't lookin' for me.
Fuck it. Right, Ange?
- Jon: You think
he's gonna be able to...
You think he's gonna be able
to keep himself outta jail?
Hey, if he
does it slick, he will.
Plus, I got a car,
I got some money, you know.
So, I'll be all right.
Believe me.
I'm gonna make it.
They ain't gettin' me.
Officer: Well, we got all the
information that we possibly need
to affect an apprehension
on our subject.
Now, we're just gonna
have to go out on the street
and get lucky.
He's 5'9", 150 pounds.
Come on.
Mom's gonna help me out?
I need it.
I gotta get outta here.
I gotta get out.
I miss it out there.
Jon: You said they were
never gonna catch you.
They got lucky.
- Freddie: You wanna see?
- Jon: What's that?
Freddie: Valium.
These pills take
all the problems
off the mind and shit, you know.
Jon: So how many pills have
you had altogether today?
Altoge... uh, 16,
plus the two-on-two.
So that's 16, 17,
18, 19, 20 pills.
And this is only
the-the beginning.
Judge: This defendant
has an extensive record.
Accordingly, you are hereby
sentenced to imprisonment
for a term of seven years
and hereby committed to the
custody of the commissioner
of the Department of Corrections
and until release
in accordance with law.
Jon: Freddie, they got you.
That's what you get
for using drugs.
Believe me.
Everybody out there,
everybody, listen
to what I'm sayin'.
It ain't worth it.
This is what I got,
and I'm gonna die here.
Bye.
Getting the anger out.
He's messing himself up.
He's messin' himself up
all the way.
Don't shoplift, get a damn job,
stay the hell off drugs,
and you'll live
a better life. Period.
You don't wanna listen to that,
go ahead and steal,
go ahead and do drugs
and watch where you be at.
And then you'll be like,
"I should've listened to Rob."
Don't do it.
Woman: You are here in
East Jersey State Prison.
It is now the home
of Michael McGrath.
Jon: Can we go in
and talk to Mike?
No. Since your last filming,
Michael no longer wants to
participate in this documentary.
Jon: Is this an easy
place to do time?
No. Rahway is a very difficult
place to serve your time.
Jon: Hey Mike.
The guards say
you're gonna be here
for a real long time.
Yeah.
Jon: Okay, this is goodbye.
- Good luck.
- Take care, Jon. All right. You too.
Jon: Are you gonna
make it all right?
Yeah, I'll be all right.
All right.
Freddie:
Welcome to Southern State.
This is my home
away from my other home.
This is my
second home right now.
Jon: What are you in for?
Freddie: Uh, robbery,
aggravated assault.
I got ten years.
This here is my partner
in the domino game.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, we the, we the champs.
Fourteen, twenty-six, thirty...
Thirty-five.
We won the championship
two years in a row in Rahway.
Anything he can need,
he has it here.
He has friends he can relate to,
recreational, free cable,
air conditioning in the summer,
heat in the winter time.
I don't like it
in here because...
can't get no, uh, sex.
Jon: Deliris, I haven't seen you
since you were a teenager
in Rob's car.
How long you been
workin' the streets?
Around six months.
Jon: Were you scared the
first time you stood out here?
Yeah. It's-it's takin'
a chance out here.
You don't know
if there's a cop or not.
Thank God up to today
I haven't got caught yet.
Jon: You're scared of
the, uh, the customers?
Yeah, 'cause you don't know,
you really don't know
who they are.
It could be a maniac.
So many stories out here
about people
killin' people and shit.
And then takin' a chance
today, too, with the AIDS.
Gotta be careful
what you do, too.
Thank you.
This is a bottle of coke.
Five-dollar bottle,
nickel bottle.
That's all to that.
Jon: How long you been
doin' that, Deliris, now?
- How long you been shootin'?
- For a year and a half.
Jon: Yeah?
And I'm not proud of it neither.
I-I hate when I, when
I start doin' this shit.
Here, hold my cigarette.
I'm pickin' out my hair.
That's what the drugs
make me do.
Make me pick my hair.
If it ain't my hair,
it's my face.
Jon: Oh, yeah?
Deliris: He knows what I
do but not how I do it.
Because I never do it
in front of them.
It's like if I see...
fleas or bugs
in my fuckin' hair.
It's just a habit I got
when I get high.
Jon: Is your mother doing
drugs every day now?
Hmm. Sometimes.
Interpreter: Every day,
it gets worse and worse.
Interpreter:
The kids are really suffering.
Jon: Mm-hmm.
Woman: Mr. Steffey, whenever
anyone gets paroled,
we focus the group on them.
So we're gonna focus on you.
What are your plans?
- Rob: My plans?
- For parole.
Rob: I'm not comin' back.
I'm not comin' back
for a fact. Okay?
Woman: To jail or here?
To any jail.
I'm not comin' back.
How many more years
you got left?
- Inmate 1: Nine.
- Nine? How many you got in?
One.
Fuck outta here. One?
Nah, you got more than that.
Inmate 2: Man, what you
gonna do when you out there?
Rob: I'm gonna do
the right thing.
I'm gonna do the right thing.
You gonna do the right...
What's the right thing then?
- Get a job.
- What kinda job?
Whatever kind I can get.
Steff, McDonald's
don't pay enough.
How you gonna
live off McDonald's?
I can sell burgers on the side.
Driver: I'm a waitin'.
What you gonna do? Relax?
Get high.
Go do it.
You got any?
I'm just afraid she's gonna get some
real strong stuff one time and it's...
You know what it's gonna do.
That bothers me.
Jon: Rob, you're done with jail.
What's up? Jon.
Free at last, huh?
I gotta go to the bank, man.
Get my money.
Right here. $878.
Can I have, um, some
50s, 10s, and 20s?
Thank you.
Oh, no. I forgot
my motherfuckin' teeth.
Fuck that, man.
Wait up, wait up, wait up.
Jon: What, you left
your teeth in jail?
Yeah. I left it in there.
Damn, I gots to get it, man.
Nah, nah, nah.
- I gots to get my teeth.
- Jon: Come on. Don't be embarrassed.
Nah, I gotta get my teeth, man.
I forgot that shit.
Jon: You're so anxious to get
out you forgot your teeth?
Hell, yeah.
I would've forget
my nuts if I...
Hold up, Jon.
I got to go back there, man.
I forgot my teeth.
It's on the table wrapped up.
Is there a way you can
get it for me, please?
Guard: Forgot your teeth?
Rob: Yeah. I forgot my teeth.
I got everything
except my teeth.
Thank you.
Shit, I ain't,
I ain't took a bus in so long
I ain't know where
to put the money, you know.
3:10.
Here I am...
free again.
What-what did you do?
Rob: What did I do
to get locked up?
Uh...
stealin', doin' drugs,
um, stolen property.
You know,
all-all kinds of bullshit.
Man: What's up, man?
How many more days
you got, Fred?
Got three more days
and, uh, wake up.
I leave Monday morning.
Guard: You gonna make
it out there this time?
Yeah, I'm gonna try.
- Guard: Good.
- You know.
Whatcha gonna do
when you get out there, Freddie?
Freddie: I don't know.
Get me, I'm gonna
try to get a job,
do the right thing, you know.
But sometimes that doesn't
work, you know, so...
Me and Freddie talk
a lot about him leavin'
and things he's gonna do
when he get home.
You know, I told him
to stay away from drugs.
If you stay away from drugs,
you'll be all right, you know.
That's his main concern.
Jon: Freddie, you love drugs.
I used to.
Why is everybody laughin'?
I think Freddie's scared
to go home though.
- Jon: Yeah?
- He told me a couple times
he was afraid to go home.
Yeah, a little bit. I am. Yeah.
Jon: Listen.
Listen. For people who
don't know who you are,
who are you?
- My name's Nelly.
- Jon: Yeah?
Freddie's mother.
- Jon: Freddie's mom?
- Yeah.
Jon: When's Freddie
comin' back from jail?
Monday.
Jon: Who in the world...
Nelly: Freddie's stepfather.
- Jon: Freddie's stepfather?
- Nelly: Yeah.
Jon: And this guy over here
with-with a striped shirt,
who is that guy?
That's my younger son, Raymond.
Jon: That's Raymond? Yeah?
- Yeah.
- We call Jungo.
- Jon: Yeah?
Good boy?
He's-he's drunk.
He's been drinkin' too much.
Jon: Muncho. Muncho!
So what's been happenin'?
- How you doin', Rob?
- All right.
- You got any jobs?
- We're kinda slow now.
Yeah, I need a job.
Yeah. I just outta jail.
Why's everything so dead?
Look at this.
This used to be full
with shop orders, right?
- Yeah.
- What have we got here now?
We have one here,
another job over here,
one, and that's it.
Years ago it used to be like,
these machines,
three machines running
at the same time all the time.
Look what you have now.
Literally one running
over there now.
- Officer William Lindsay: So how you been?
- Rob: I've been all right.
Look for work?
- Rob: Huh?
- Look for work?
- Yeah.
- Where?
I went all over.
I'm not gonna look no more.
Ain't no jobs out there.
And where I'm stayin',
they want some rent money
or I might have to leave.
So if I don't find a job soon,
I got no choice
but go hustle again.
I tried it, no jobs.
So if I wind back in...
up in jail,
I wind up back there.
Officer Lindsay:
Did I tell you it was easy?
No, you didn't say it was easy.
Okay. Good.
Rob: I brought chicken.
You got rice?
- Woman: What is it?
- Rob: Chicken.
- Chicken?
- Rob: Chicken.
I hope you know how to cook.
I just made dinner.
Well, cook tomorrow.
Thank you.
Real chicken.
What?
Kid 1: What?
What? Chicken.
Kid 1: No, don't make it.
Woman: Oh, God.
Kid 2: What is that?
Where'd you get a chicken from?
Rob: It's all right.
Hey, guys,
we got chicken tonight.
That sucker is big!
- Rob: How about if I cut the head off?
- No!
- I'm only cuttin' the head off.
- Kid: No!
- No!
- Woman: Rob!
Thank you.
Muncho...
Jungo, what's up?
That's enough for me.
Jon: Well, I gotta tell you.
This is a big difference
from the reception Rob got.
I mean, your family
really loves you.
I mean, he had nothin'
when he got out.
Yeah. Well, as you see.
Where's Freddie?
What's up, man?
What's happening, homes?
- About motherfuckin' time.
- Yeah.
Couple years, huh?
- You look good though, homes.
- Yeah.
Jon, I'm movin' today.
- Jon: What do you mean?
- Found another place to stay.
Jon: ♪ It's a beautiful
day in Rob's neighborhood ♪
Yeah, I'm openin' up, man.
You know, I open up
every morning, you know.
Sell some cars, make some green.
Jon: What are you
supposed to do here?
- Huh?
- Jon: What are you supposed to do?
I open up.
You know,
hang around, sell cars,
fix 'em, whatever.
There's always work
to be done here, you know.
Jon: Where you livin'?
I'm stayin' in the back here.
Yeah. Free of cost, you know.
Bought me a little
jacket here, you know.
Look presentable, you know.
Like a salesman, you know.
You gotta work to make money.
What else would
I be doin', shopliftin'?
How's this car? Good car, right?
- Yeah.
- You get...
How much you get
for this? $1,500, right?
- $1,800.
- Man: $1,800.
Rob: Eighteen.
Let me see if I got it.
One, two, three, four, five,
six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
Jon: Where you off to, Rob?
Goin' out a little bit.
You know, after you work,
you gotta go out a little bit.
You can't stay here
all night, you know.
- Man: Oh, a little bit...
- Yeah.
Yeah. I gotta get
my love back, man.
My life ain't
complete without it.
Oh...
- This is Deliris.
- Kiky: Hey, Robert.
She was my ex-girl.
But that was, like,
how many years ago?
- Thirteen years ago.
- Thirteen years ago?
You know, and now
we got, like, kinda,
we got back together
and we seein'
if we can work it out, you know.
These are her kids.
Does she look happy
with me or what?
Maybe it's true love after all.
Kiky: Hello.
Rob: What you want?
What you want?
Deliris: Say thank
you for the ice cream.
Thank you.
- Thank you.
- Rob: You're welcome.
Jon: So what do you think?
You like Robert?
- Yeah.
- Jon: Nice guy?
- Yeah.
- Jon: Yeah?
How about you? Do you like Rob?
Yeah.
Hey!
Hey. Come on now.
This is not for
the public to see, you know.
I don't want to teach
nobody my moves, you know.
- I do my shit.
- You better not.
Play with Kiky.
Oh, shit.
- Jon: Hey Fred.
- What's up?
Jon: Your mother always
hang out of the window
like this all night long?
Freddie: Yeah. She
wants us to go to bed.
Once-once we go to bed,
she'll go to bed.
Jon: Really?
Freddie: Yeah, Roseann!
Oh, Freddie!
- You look good, girl.
- So you've been in prison?
- Yeah, six years.
- I've never been in prison.
I know you haven't
been to prison.
Never. I'm just a dancer.
I understand. You look good.
I like your voice.
I was lookin' at you
at the bar, you know.
And, you know,
I wanted to step to you,
but, uh, I didn't
wanna, you know...
I think you're really cool.
I have to go get my tips.
Okay. Go take care of business.
I ain't seen
nothin' like that in prison.
Man, there were
some fine asses in there.
Word.
I'm-I'm gonna
move him outta here.
- Rob: Yeah, I'm comin' with...
- Jon: What are you doin'?
I'm moving him
out of here to my home.
- Jon: Are you?
- Deliris: Yes.
Jon: You're gonna
move in with Deliris?
Yeah. Goin' back up.
- Jon: Movin' in, huh?
- Rob: Yeah, yeah.
Jon: You gonna domesticate Rob?
Rob: I'ma domesticate her.
Jon: What's been goin' on?
What's "domesticate" anyway?
Jon: What's all these hickeys?
Rob: Those are
love marks and shit.
- Jon: Yeah?
- Rob: Yeah.
Love marks.
Come on, son. That's my boy.
That's my boy.
As his parole officer,
I'm going to be
looking for anything
in the home environment
that... might cause
a problem for him
to be in that particular home.
- Freddie: This is my mother.
- Officer Neyda Carrillo: Yeah.
I seen you comin', I said,
"Uh-oh, she's comin'
to lock me up."
No. So what did you
do this weekend?
Nothin'. Just hung out
around here.
I don't wanna get high no more.
That-that's out, you know.
It's just the problems,
you know.
You're starting
a whole new life.
So now you have to learn
how to work within the system.
Okay.
Officer Lindsay: Uh, Mr. Steffey,
this is Mr. Turback.
He's assistant district
parole supervisor.
What's different from
the last time you were here
or the time before?
Rob: Oh, because
the time before,
I wasn't using.
I was doing good
and then I messed up,
and then I told you about it.
Officer Turback: I think you've
made admission to Mr. Lindsay
that you were using drugs.
Was that cocaine or heroin?
Yes, that was the heroin.
- Heroin?
- Dope.
Yeah, yeah. Right.
Officer Turback:
And when was that?
When was the first time?
That was a month ago,
right, when I came?
You tryin' to make sure
you're tellin' him
the same thing you're tellin' me
or are you tryin' to answer
his question honestly?
Rob: Honestly, what?
When's the last time
you used drugs, Mr. Steffey?
Rob: Over three weeks ago.
About three weeks ago.
- Over three weeks ago.
- When's the first time you used any drugs?
First time? About four
weeks or somethin' ago.
Officer Lindsay: Why is it that I
have a hard time believing you, Rob?
Rob: Well...
You seem to be
workin' in your mind,
"Well, what did I tell,
what did I tell Lindsay?
I better tell this guy
the same thing."
How come, how come
I have such a hard time...
Rob: Remember when
I came to see you?
Officer Lindsay: I think it's about
time we just-just laid it out, Rob.
You might as well be
asking this ball, Mr. Lindsay,
for all the intelligent answers.
Rob: Well, can you get me help?
That's the main problem.
Officer Turback: Help is there.
Rob: Well, I'll accept the help.
- You'll accept the help? Huh.
- Rob: Right.
We're not gonna
play with this, Rob.
We're gonna try
and get you help.
If that doesn't work,
you will be locked up.
- You understand that?
- Yeah, I understand.
Thank you, Mr. Turback.
We're gonna go to the car
while you go to the store
and buy somethin' to eat. Okay?
No, I wanna go with you.
To the c... to mommy's car.
I wanna go with you.
Yeah, but you gotta go
get something to eat first.
I'll wait for you
in the car. Okay?
I wanna go with...
Go where? I'm not goin'.
We're goin' right here.
Freddie: Yvette,
I'll be right back.
- Deliris: Where we going?
- Freddie: Take a right.
Now, stop right here like you
actin' like you're gonna park.
Stop right there. Stop.
Where you goin'?
- Deliris: Oh, okay.
- Freddie: It's too late now.
Go ahead. Park, park. Park.
In case the police
would've came by,
they would have seen
that you was tryin'
to learn how to drive, you know.
Poison. Poison used to kill
a lot of motherfuckers
years ago.
I'll be rolling in a minute.
Deliris: I don't give a fuck
about money, drugs, or nothin'.
The main thing is that
I love you and I'm with you.
That's the main thing.
You don't supposed to be hangin'
with people that get high.
You don't supposed to be
givin' people rides.
You said you were
gonna stop all that.
You're doin' the same shit.
- Are you or are you not?
- Deliris: No. No.
- No? What the fuck you been doin'?
- No, not-not like before.
- Not like before, Robert.
- It's the same shit.
No, it's not.
You believe when they
told you that I slept with him.
That's bullshit 'cause he
could tell you himself.
Take your ass on away from me.
I will. If that's
what you want, I will.
Rob: She thinks that she's
not doin' anything wrong.
My girl's stayin' out till
three o'clock with another man?
Fuck I look like,
a stupid ass or somethin'?
Is Mommy lyin' or what?
Everything she say
is a lie, right?
Okay. I believe her.
Freddie: Just got paid.
It's Wednesday night.
This is from sellin' dope.
- Jon: Yeah?
- One night's work.
Jon: Who sold dope?
Who-who sold it?
My bitch.
Jon:
Deliris sold the dope? Yeah.
Where'd you get
that money from, Deliris?
Where I got that money from?
She sold some dope. I told you.
No, I don't sell dope.
Jon: It's about one o'clock
in the mornin', right?
Yeah.
Jon: You stay up this
late every night, Kiky?
Yeah.
Jon: Every night
you're up this late?
That's terrible.
Who takes care of you and Chimo
when your mother goes off?
Do you have to
take care of yourself?
- Chimo: Mom!
- Kiky: Huh?
Jon: You have to
take care of yourself?
Yeah.
Chimo: Mom.
Jon: Where's your mother goin'?
Freddie: Hey!
Deliris: He's coming.
Jon: Where is she goin'?
She goin' to buy somethin'?
Kiky:
Yeah. She went to the, um...
she went to go to Pam.
Jon: To Pam?
You know who's Pam?
Jon: Uh, to tell you the truth,
I think I know
who lives up there.
It's the people
that sell D-R-U-G-S.
What?
Jon: They sell things up there,
and that's where she's gone.
No.
Freddie: Come on.
I got 'em, they're all right.
Jon: So, Deliris, did you
just buy some D-R-U-G-S?
Yeah. We got today and tomorrow.
Freddie:
Get the camera down, Jon.
Keep it down.
I don't want 'em to stop me
or nothin' with my fuckin' car.
Jon: So now it's almost
2:00 in the morning.
Chimo: Mommy.
Let's see.
It's 3:00 in the morning.
Chimo, you want me to stay here?
Answer me. I can't hear you.
What's that?
Freddie: Do you want
me to stay here?
No.
- Bye, Jon.
- Jon: Bye.
Do you want me to go...
- Jon: See ya.
- See ya.
What's up, Rob?
Rob. What's up, bud?
Rob: I don't wanna talk.
I don't care
if she goes fuckin',
I don't care, man.
I don't know, Rob. You pick
some of the strangest women.
Like, take me, for instance.
Why don't y'all cheer Rob up?
'Cause Rob, me and Rob
did prison time together.
What's up?
We got Rob out the car now.
He's feelin' comfortable.
All right, Rob.
- Rob!
- Man: We got Rob...
- Rob: Nah.
- Sure?
- I don't...
- Man: It's on you, man.
You want a taste, Rob?
- How much money you got?
- Rob: You tryin' to tempt me?
- You got some money, Rob?
- Rob: Yeah, I got money.
You want a taste?
I wouldn't even
do that to you, Rob.
You're strong, man. Stay strong.
- I am. I don't want that shit, period.
- Man: Stay strong.
Devil is callin' you, Rob.
"Rob... get me, Rob.
Come on, Rob."
It's the devil.
"Rob, you got
a pocketful of money, Rob.
Rob, Rob."
You hear him? Get him
off your shoulder.
Knock him off, Rob.
You could tempt me all day.
I don't want the shit.
- If he feel like drinkin'...
- But it could be a time
that I want somethin'...
- You know what I mean?
- He gonna do it.
Then I'll be "Fuck,
I'ma get me a bag."
- And ain't nobody can stop him...
- Know what I mean?
'Cause if that's what
the man wanna do,
he gonna do it.
Freddie: "Rob, my blood!"
Do you know Deliris?
Rob: Yeah, I know her.
Remember her.
Everybody's saying
she's my wife now.
I don't know why
everybody sayin' that shit.
- Rob: Must be true then.
- Freddie: Hey...
Deliris: Yeah, I know.
Freddie: So I took
Deliris, and I asked her.
I said, "Who got it better,
me or Robert?" You know.
And she said me.
She said, "You got it
bigger and better."
But you gotta understand,
I'm Puerto Rican.
Today is my parole day.
I gotta go see my parole,
and my urine is dirty, dirty.
I'm gonna take
a bottle of Clorox
and stick my fingers in it,
you know.
And when I go and take a urine,
I urinate on my hand.
- Jon: You're dirty?
- Yes. You know that.
- Jon: Real dirty?
- Real, real dirty.
I can observe the stream.
I can observe what he is
putting into the bottle.
If anyone had not
flushed before him,
he could not simply,
uh, do what we call
a bowl scoop.
- Jon: A what?
- A bowl scoop.
Freddie: Yeah. Scoop it out
the bowl from under here.
Jon: Are you serious?
Man: The bowl scoop is
not the right temperature.
After so many years
of taking urine samples
and handling them,
you get to know
what temperature they're
supposed to feel like
in the palm of your hand.
You know, and...
Jon: You know what's
kosher and what's not.
Basically, yeah.
Oh, wow.
But it's better
than nothing, Freddie.
I'm so proud of you
and how hard
you tried to do this.
It shows... it shows that you
are really tryin' hard here
to prove to us
that you're not doin'
anything out there
in those streets.
And if this comes back positive,
you're in trouble!
Your goose is cooked, hon.
Don't worry, it won't.
I know it won't.
I know it won't.
I'm betting on it.
It was like 80% Clorox
and 20% urine.
Now jump the fuck in before
I knock you the fuck down.
- Come on. Get in.
- Jon: All right.
What, you got
business to take care of?
- Yes, I want...
- Jon: You're gonna get high probably.
Yeah. I'm gonna go get me
a bag of dope, man,
after all that.
Get me a couple bags of dope.
Get in the fuckin' car.
Oh...
Get the fuck in the...
Get in the car.
Where they goin'?
They still okay or what?
- Shut up!
- Freddie: Shut up!
- Jesus Christ.
- Deliris: Chimo.
Freddie: Come on, Kik, I mean...
We're just gonna
come right back, all right?
Mom, I wanna buy...
Freddie: Go ahead.
- Real quick before the kids get back.
- Deliris: Yeah.
Man: Yo. What's up, bro?
Rob:
Yeah, I'm motherfuckin' gettin'
drunker than a motherfucker.
I ain't did no drugs yet.
And I hope I stay like that.
- You know, I'm havin' a good time...
- I hope you stay like that, too.
Oh, of course.
You know, I'm havin'
a good time fuckin' drinking.
But once you've been,
like, addicted to drugs,
after you drink,
that shit makes you
wanna do the drugs
that you want.
You know what I'm sayin'?
Well, are you, are you
learning from your mistakes?
Oh, I learned.
But still, the force
of drugs is so powerful.
It make you wanna go back.
You know what I'm sayin'?
Man, just learn
from your mistakes, bro.
Yeah.
Man 1: You'll get there.
You'll get there.
Man 2: Butch, what's up, man?
Man 1: What's up, man?
Gonna go get a AIDS test.
Jon: How long's it take
before you get the result?
Freddie: Three weeks.
Probably be dead by then, right?
Nurse: Have you done
this before other places?
Freddie: No.
I'm gonna tie you up
and see what's going on.
When the results come in,
who's gonna tell me, you?
- I am.
- Good.
Hurts still?
Jon: Freddie, your
life in a bottle here.
Yeah, right?
- Jon: Kiky.
- Kiky: What?
That's dangerous,
your brother sittin' there
right at the window.
Chimo, get off the window.
Man: They're abusive.
They are very abusive.
The fact of the matter is that...
Oh, that's that asshole.
Man: Yeah.
Came to find out
the results of my tests.
Nurse 1: Okay.
Nurse 2:
Okay. You have your card?
Yes.
I'm scared.
Everybody's dyin'.
One or two people left
that I used to run with.
And they're on their way out.
- Nurse: You all right?
- Freddie: Yeah.
Nurse: Okay.
Your results came back reactive.
Basically, what that means
is that you have been
exposed to HIV.
How you doin'?
It's okay. It's all right.
Turn around.
- You don't remember my face, do you?
- No.
And you got a little run
out your nose, too, okay?
- That's 'cause you...
- I... Of course. I got a cold.
- I'm freezin', man.
- Officer: It's not that cold out here, okay?
It's not that cold. Your no...
your nose is runny,
your mouth is dry.
Listen, you're talkin'
to me, all right?
You ain't talkin' to somebody
else on the streets, okay?
I know what you do, whatever.
What I'm gonna advise you now
is to stay away
from these areas.
-'Cause if I catch you again tonight...
- I am gonna stay away, man.
Listen to me.
I'm talking to you.
If I catch you again tonight,
you know what I'm gonna
have to do, right?
Okay, I gotta do what I gotta do
and lock you up for
obstructing a public passage.
I can't leave you out here
'cause you're gonna
get yourself hurt.
You're gonna get shot by
these jokers over here, okay?
- All right.
- Okay?
'Cause you know they'll shoot you
in a heartbeat 'cause you're white.
You don't belong
around here, all right?
Plain and simple.
He's the kinda guy that one day
we're gonna catch him
somewhere dead.
Which is a shame
'cause he's actually,
you know,
I'm not gonna judge him,
but he doesn't seem
like a bad guy.
But he's hooked on that stuff.
And he'll go anywhere
and he'll do anything
to catch his drug,
to get his drugs.
- Deliris: Eight plus one?
- Chimo: Nine.
Four minus two?
Two.
Deliris: Do me a favor.
Look through that window
and check if...
Remember Jose?
Girl: Jose!
My aunt said hold on and she'll
be down in a few minutes.
Every time she's clean,
he's right, he's right there,
she goes right back in.
See you in a few days.
I don't know
what to say, but, um,
my heart is
full of love with her.
And I wanna know.
I know that we love you,
but we don't know
how much you love us.
Oh, I love you. I love you all.
Kiky: If you love us all, why
you not doing so good for us?
We want you to come back,
but you never try.
I will.
If you love us so much,
why your hand is
halfway on the door?
'Cause, uh,
I'm ready to go outside.
I'm getting hot.
I'll see y'all tomorrow.
Good night, Charlie.
Good night.
If you wanna kill yourself,
easy way out.
I really wish
my life was different.
Judge:
We're here on sentence day,
State of New Jersey
versus Wilfredo Rodriguez.
Count one of
first-degree armed robbery.
Count two of fourth-degree
possession of an imitation firearm.
Prosecutor:
Judge, this is, um, a person
who's been afforded
every opportunity
within
the criminal justice system.
And at a certain point,
it's just time to, uh,
warehouse this type
of individual.
Judge:
Gonna commit Mr. Rodriguez
to the custody
of the commissioner
for 15 years in prison,
that sentence to run concurrent
to any violation of parole
that may be imposed
as a result of this sentence.
Okay, good luck to you,
Mr. Rodriguez.
Oh!
Oh, shit.
Get me up.
Oh, you's a heavy fuck.
Should've took me off
faster, you know.
Now, it gets hard, right, Burt?
- Thanks, my brother.
- Burt: No problem.
My Nu... Nubian brother.
Robbie, you had
a little too much.
Come on,
get yourself together, man,
before you fall again.
Get up, man. Come on, yo.
That's what drugs do, see?
Have you nodding
and falling, man.
Rob?
How many bags you did today?
Huh, Rob?
Rob?
Yo?
Rob?
Well, I suggest for people
that doin' drugs, man,
look at the place
where Rob is at
and look at Rob right here
and his condition
of being on drugs, man.
He don't straighten up himself,
this is where he's gonna die at.
Man: That's where you
gonna find him dead at,
right at this house right here.
This abandoned building.
- Hey, Jon.
- Jon: Freddie!
- What's up, buddy?
- Jon: Freddie, how are you...
It's been seven long years.
Jon: What is this place?
This is Riverfront State Prison.
Jon: Yeah?
This has been my view
for the past seven years.
You know what I'm sayin'?
And, um, I got one more to go.
But hopefully, I'll be
in a halfway house
and I won't have
to see these wires
and these barbed wires anymore.
Jon: You ever think
about escaping?
I mean, you could swim
right across the river.
Freddie: Nah, nah.
I'm not thinking about escaping.
- Jon: Yeah.
- It's not for me.
Too old to be runnin', you know.
Now, I'm gonna,
I want to show you,
I want, I wanna show you, um...
what, um...
helps me stay clean.
Right there.
My daughter, my son.
I haven't seen 'em
in about seven,
six to seven years now.
Hey, Jon, what's up?
- What's happenin'?
- Jon: How long's it been?
Um, this'll be
28 months... this month.
Two years, four months.
Jon: Tell me what you
were locked up for?
I was locked up for robbery,
second-degree robbery.
Jon: You look good.
Look like you've been eatin'.
Rob: Yeah, I've been eatin'.
Jon: Exercising.
Exercising every day. Joggin'.
See, this, like, people...
some people
need to get locked up
but not for
a short period of time.
Jon: Well, I think you were
a good candidate for that
because you were
basically gonna die
- unless you went to jail.
- Yeah. Yeah.
Deliris: These were the track marks
from where I was shooting up at.
Yep.
So now look where we all wind up
and it's all
because of the drugs.
All because of the drugs.
Rob was locked up.
I'm locked up.
Freddie's locked up.
And it all got to do with drugs.
Drugs don't bring nothin'.
They just gonna kill you.
They almost killed me.
Thank God I'm here.
I thank God I'm here today.
Step through here.
Guard: All right, kids, is you
ready to visit your mother?
What's your name,
Kiky, Kimo... Chimo?
Kiky: Every day I pray at night
to see if I could
see you to come out.
Deliris: Keep prayin',
because I'm praying, too.
That's the only thing
that will help us,
is the Lord
to hear our prayer, that's it.
You doin' good in school?
- You're not doin'...
- Kiky: Straight C's.
- Deliris: Huh?
- Straight C's.
Deliris: C's?
What happened
to the A's and B's?
I don't know.
Wait till I come out.
Things will start
getting better.
Remember that paper I gave you
that said you were
in my heart and my soul?
I still love you that way.
- Deliris: I love you, too.
- All right.
I want her to stay so she could
get more clean and stuff,
but I still want her
to be there for me.
- Jon: But she never has been.
- No.
Only when I was small.
Jon: And now, what do you
think's gonna happen to you?
To me? I don't really know.
I know I'll stay
in school and stuff.
Never use drugs.
When someone ask me somebody,
uh, smokin' and stuff,
I'll say no.
I'll walk away.
And I know what's gonna happen.
Jon: You think you're
gonna have a good future?
Hmm. Yeah.
And I know I try
to keep it bright, too.
This is a therapeutic community
drug... drug program.
- Bunch of people havin' meetings...
- Jon: Yeah.
Freddie: and, um, tryin'
to stay away from drugs.
I've been drug free
for a while now, and I...
Jon: How long?
Uh... about a year, I'll say.
Ten months to a year.
Jon: So for the first
four years in jail...
I was getting high
just about every day.
Jon: Yeah?
I, um, take computer class
in mornings here.
This is my teacher,
Miss Dartash.
- Hi.
- Jon: Hi, how are you?
Good morning. Good morning.
Freddie: As you can see,
I've been gettin' 100s.
Got 100 for this one,
100 for this one.
Sometimes I, um, get 90s.
96, 98.
But I try to keep my 100s.
Jon: Hey, Rob. You're out?
What's up?
Jon:
What are you supposed to do...
I gotta go
to the parole board now
and see what they want me to do.
Officer Kevin Mahoney:
Hi, I'm Mr. Mahoney.
I'm gonna be your parole officer
while you're out here
on the street.
Rob: Right.
And I see you're new to Trenton.
- Rob: Right. I'm new.
- Okay.
- You've been through this before.
- Yeah.
Officer Mahoney: How do you think
you're gonna make out this time?
- Good. Yeah.
- Officer Mahoney: You think so?
I'm determined
to do good this time.
- Officer Mahoney: Your drug was heroin, right?
- Yeah.
That's a real
tough thing to kick.
Yeah.
They wanna saturate you
with supervision
-for the first couple months, okay?
- That's all right.
To kinda get you steerin'
towards the right direction.
- That's good.
- So if there's any kinda slip-ups,
everything could be
picked up right away.
So we go through the '80s
with some shoplifting,
receiving stolen property.
All this is related
to your addiction.
See, this is
the criminal mind, too.
You got about
seven, eight date of births
and seven, eight, maybe more
Social Security numbers.
Antoine Boustany,
Robert Hansen, Robert Medina.
Do you ever get parolees
that really wanna straighten up
and that, you know,
and, you know,
- and they do good?
- A lot of guys.
With big records like me?
We have a lot of guys...
It's possible.
Rob: You know where
I could cash this at?
- I ain't got no ID.
- Officer Mahoney: Okay.
Rob: Robert Medina.
I got you as Robert Steffey.
And I'm saying if this
was for Robert Steffey,
I could take you
to the bank and...
See what happens
when you use fake names?
Officer Mahoney: Yeah, jeez.
I'll get it cashed.
Don't matter.
There you go.
- All right. See you Monday.
- Rob: Thank you.
- Rob: All right.
- Officer Mahoney: Probably be out
sometime this week
to see you, too.
- All right.
- Rob: Okay.
- Good luck.
- Rob: All right.
- Freddie: Thanks.
- All right.
Take it easy.
- Freddie: Thank you.
- Woman: All right.
Don't forget your cart.
Freddie: This is my property.
My clothes, my cigarettes
and stuff like that.
Woman: Sorry.
Jon: Freddie, what are
all these pills for?
It's my medication for my HIV.
Give me all this medication.
I've been had this medication.
I was supposed
to have been takin' it.
- I haven't been takin' it.
- Jon: Why not?
Because the doctor told me
it was gonna give me
a false positive for marijuana.
And since they take
my urine so much,
I was afraid that it was
gonna come back positive
and they was gonna
send me back to prison.
So I stopped takin'
my medication for that reason.
Jon: You mean you had to between
your health and your freedom?
Correct.
And I did what I had to do
because what was I gonna do,
get sent back to prison?
Come on.
I've had enough of prison.
Mr. Morrison.
- Take care of yourself.
- Thank you for everything.
- All right.
- Thank you so much, sir.
- Peace.
- Yep.
- Thank you again.
- Mr. Morrison: You're welcome.
Freddie: Ten years.
Freedom!
Officer Mahoney:
Comin' over to Eckerd's here.
This is where Bob's been working
for the last couple months.
He's a stock person.
He's working his way up
to general manager.
- Jon: You serious?
- Yeah.
He's actually working,
legitimate work,
making legitimate money.
And he's, uh,
you can see for yourself
when we come in.
Hey, Bob.
- Mr. Mahoney, what's up?
- How you doin'?
Are you going to your meetings?
- You haven't been using any drugs?
- Rob: Nope.
Officer Mahoney: What
kinda work you doin' here?
I stock the shelves.
- I help customers.
- Mm-hmm.
You know, when we have,
like, items that's on sale,
I mark 'em down.
When you were the different Rob,
you were out kinda
rippin' stores off.
Yeah, I used to come
to the stores and shoplift.
- And shoplift.
- I used to take the stuff off the shelves.
Now, I'm loadin' it back up.
All right. How long
you been sober?
And, uh, how long
you been straight the last...
Uh, sober? Like 29 months.
- Officer Mahoney: That's it.
- Twenty-nine months altogether,
in jail and I got out, you know.
Twenty-seven months, like,
three months on the street.
- Officer Mahoney: Yeah.
- Yeah.
Officer Mahoney: It's happened.
I've seen transformations before,
- but, again...
- I don't believe in myself.
It's a couple months.
I don't believe in myself.
Officer Mahoney: It's a couple months.
It's a start.
Once, you know, you take,
as your program says,
one day at a time.
- And that's what you do...
- There's things in here
that I could steal,
and they wouldn't even
know about it.
But I don't want to do that
'cause these people,
because these people
trusted me and gave me a job.
A lot of people went through
a lot of trouble
to get me a job.
You know what I mean?
And help me.
And why am I gonna mess that up?
Officer John Larkin:
They're ready for you.
Miss Shafran is gonna be
your permanent parole officer,
but she's gonna be out
for the next
week and a half or so.
In the meantime, I'm gonna...
I'm gonna supervise you.
My name, Larkin.
On the back,
that's my direct line.
- Freddie: Okay.
- Okay?
We both have voice mail.
So if you need to contact us,
there's no excuse why you can't
leave a message, all right?
- How long you been away?
- Ten years.
- Officer Larkin: Ten straight?
- Yeah.
All right.
Tats, tattoos, scars, marks.
Freddie: Chest, back, arms.
Take off the shirt.
Man, parole was
kinda strict today.
Jon: Deliris, you're back.
Where you been?
Alone.
Just came out the rehab
after being there
for three months.
Thank God.
- Jon: You're clean?
- I'm clean for three months.
Thank God. I don't have to
wake up sick no more.
I don't have to go crazy
looking for my drug no more.
Jon: When she walked back in
and you saw her
lookin' like this,
were you surprised?
- Chimo and Kiky: Yeah.
- Jon: Huh?
- Yeah.
- Jon: Why?
Because she got fatter.
Coach: Just like that.
See what I'm saying?
Today is your day.
It's your game.
If you choose to do good,
then you're gonna do good.
If you choose to get up there
and get nervous and get scared,
then you're gonna
make a bad choice
because you're not
gonna do your best.
Always do your best.
No matter what you do in life,
do your best.
Catcher: Come on, Kiky!
Coach:
Stay relaxed. Stay relaxed.
Batter: Ow.
Coach: Don't let other
people get you upset.
Don't get nervous,
and don't be worryin'
about you're gonna hit,
hit the batter.
Because your
concentration is just
throwing to the catcher's glove.
Woman: Swing at it.
Kid: Come on, come on.
Coach: One, two, three!
Kids: Cardinals!
Coach: Today, Kiky
gets the game ball.
We're gonna get
the whole team to sign it.
- Jon: Yeah.
- Coach: Okay?
Mom.
Jon: What are we doing?
Protection. You never know.
I don't work in Neverland.
Officer Morano:
7-1-6 and 7-5-4. 10-6 to 2-74.
Johnson Avenue, Newark.
Officer Larkin: How you doin'?
Hi, little guy.
Freddie: John.
Officer Larkin: How you doin'?
How you doin', Freddie?
- Freddie: Hey, Mr. Larkin.
- Officer Larkin: What's up?
Officer: Hi, how are you?
How's everything? Hello, sir.
How you doin'? How you doin'?
How you doin'?
Well, how many people are here?
I mean, is this all pe...
like, in the kitchen...
No, no, no.
My father just came over.
Okay. But besides the people
in the kitchen here
and all the kids, is that,
is that everybody in the house?
Or are there people upstairs?
I'm just asking outta curiosity.
Freddie:
Just my brother's upstairs.
First thing, I need
a urine from you.
Okay? Bathroom around here?
Uh, let's go upstairs.
Officer Larkin: You got it.
How you doin'? Hi.
I'm Officer Larkin.
I'm his new PO.
Freddie: That's my sister
and my brother-in-law.
Officer Larkin:
How you doin', guys?
- After you. Huh?
- Man: Good luck.
Officer Larkin: Let me ask you, Freddie.
How bad is it at the house?
What do they use? Heroin?
I honestly don't know.
I think they're smokin',
but I'm not sure.
- Because...
- Officer Larkin: Smokin' what? Crack? Weed?
I would think. You know, I've
been away for a lot of years.
I don't really know
too much about that stuff
and how you act.
I think the best step for you
is to get out of that house.
You wanna stay away from chaos?
I think you should
get outta Johnson Ave.
Okay.
I would recommend
this place on Hunterdon Street.
Four hundred and sixty dollars
a month.
Right here. That's the house.
- You John?
- John: Yeah.
Officer Larkin: How you doin', John?
I'm Officer Larkin.
- This is Officer Morano.
- Officer Morano: How you doin'?
- All right.
- Officer Larkin: This is Freddie.
Freddie's a possible renter.
- Check it out.
- Bedroom.
This is the bathroom.
Officer Larkin:
You ever been on your own?
Without family around?
- Just your own place?
- No.
If you decide
you can't take this place,
you're either going to a hotel
for however long it takes
you to find a place.
You're not goin' back
to Johnson Ave.
I don't feel, I don't feel
comfortable here honestly.
John:
You don't feel comfortable?
No.
Officer Larkin: Well, then
you-you-you're mandated,
I'm mandatin' you
to stay at that hotel.
I don't care if you
go through all your savings.
Hotel concierge: So the total
will be for two nights is...
$246.38.
- And that's the cheapest you have?
- Yes.
- Freddie: I don't know how you do this.
- Officer Larkin: Arrow down.
- Officer Morano: See which way the arrow is?
- Freddie: Yeah.
Officer Morano: Like that.
- Officer Larkin: Go ahead.
- Officer Morano: That's your key.
Freddie: Okay, that's better,
this is better than the dump.
Officer Larkin:
Little bit better?
Yeah, right? Not too shabby.
I wish I could, um, stay here.
Well, if you wanna pay
$3,000 a month.
I don't even make that much.
If I find you laying your head
at Johnson Avenue,
you could go back to prison.
Keep that in mind.
Freddie:
It's a nice place, but...
and I wish
I could stay here, but...
it's not possible.
I don't make the money
to stay here.
Jon: Deliris, introduce
me to your friends.
- Hi.
- This is Tanya and Celeste.
- Jon: Uh-huh.
- How are you?
Jon: How are you?
Nice to see you.
What type of drugs
you been takin'?
Heroin and cocaine.
- Jon: Yeah? How about you?
- Yeah, same thing.
Jon: Where you gonna
take 'em, Deliris?
Where can they go
to get cleaned up?
I was gonna take 'em
to Secaucus, where I went to,
'cause they have
eight programs out there.
Jon: But I heard that they're closing
that program down 'cause of tax cuts.
- Yeah, I heard that, too.
- Jon: And it's hard to get people in, right?
It's hard to get a bed.
- Come on.
- Let's go.
Deliris: I figure if I can do
it, y'all could do it, too.
Tanya: Yeah, I could do it.
I have two girls that would
like to go into the program.
Okay, I spoke to...
Excuse me, Chimo.
I spoke to the guy
where I went to.
And he said that there ain't
no beds right now.
But he's gonna try
to get in contact with...
'cause he's on lunch,
off the campus.
What he's gonna try to do
is talk to the guy
so they could take ya
preadmission through the phone.
And once they do that,
he'll let ya know
before he finish talkin' to ya
if he could squeeze ya
in a bed for this weekend.
Why are you cryin'?
I wanna go.
Deliris: We're gonna
try through all corners.
- Woman: I ain't gonna give up.
-'Cause I know, I know the feeling.
And I know
what y'all goin' through.
And I know how it is
when you get sick and tired
of being sick and tired.
So we just gotta keep trying.
This is my friend Evelyn.
She needs someone
to help her get into a detox.
I told her that I'm gonna
see what I can do.
You know, and she, and she's
willing to accept the help, right?
Evelyn: Yes, I am.
Jon: What type of
drugs are you using?
- Heroin.
- Jon: Huh?
- Heroin.
- Jon: Oh, yeah?
- Rob: What else?
- Crack.
Yeah.
Jon: How do you get the money?
Prostitution.
Just like Deliris.
But maybe she's smart enough
to stop the shit.
Jon: So how long
you been addicted?
Almost six years now,
on and off.
Jon: Yeah?
It's about helping people now.
I done went to the jail
in Trenton, spoke.
I went to the youth house
and spoke.
Yeah, I went to Bo Robinson's.
There were like
200 inmates I spoke.
Freddie:
We're gonna go see my children.
Fifteen years, I've seen 'em
a couple times in between.
I really don't know them.
And, uh, I'm goin' upstairs
to see 'em now.
I feel nervous.
I feel scared. I don't know.
Look, it's a snowman.
- Kids: Who is it?
- It's Freddie.
Daughter: Oh, my God. What's up?
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. How you been?
Freddie: I wanna...
hang out with y'all
as much as I can.
Well, you know
we live in New York, so...
I know, and that's the problem
because I can't travel
to New York.
- Yeah.
- Well, right now, you know.
Maybe in the near future
when they take these
restrictions off me.
We're goin' to DrJays?
What you need, Freddie?
Freddie: I don't need
nothin', my brother.
- They construction, right?
- Yeah.
Yeah. I like these pants.
These are hot.
I like these right here a lot.
I'm gonna look
at the hats again.
Daughter: I feel comfortable.
I thought I would
feel uncomfortable, but...
I do. I feel very comfortable
around you.
Do you?
You feel comfortable around me?
No. Nah, I do.
But not-not-not completely.
I feel it still, you know.
That's messed up.
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
♪ Happy birthday
dear Elizabeth ♪
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
Blow out the candles.
Thank you.
Blow out the candles.
- Make a wish.
- Woman: Enjoy.
This has been one of the
best days of my life.
Uh, 'cause I haven't
seen you in a long time, and...
and you come back,
and I'm happy,
and it seems like
you never even left.
And I wanna thank you so much.
I love you so much!
Freddie: You're
makin' me all mushy.
Jon: How many drug pushers
do we have in the courtyard?
Like ten.
Jon: How in the world is Deliris
gonna be able to stay clean
when there is a lot
of people out here
who are gonna help her out
if she wants to do
the wrong thing?
Man: All it is out here, man.
Niggas just be sellin' it, man.
They don't give a fuck
about a damn thing.
They're makin' at least
$2,000-$3,000 a day.
Absolutely.
Outta six dealers, each one
of 'em can make that much a day.
- Man: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Jon: Whoa.
How long does it take you
to make that much money?
Man: About-about a half hour.
- Jon: For real?
- Man: Yeah.
Deliris: You know how much
money they made with me?
Jon: I don't know, Deliris.
I mean, if we look around here,
you're almost surrounded.
Right? How do you
feel sometimes?
- Tempted.
- Jon: Yeah.
Man:
It's all about survivin', man.
And she gotta be strong
for herself.
You gotta be
within your own self.
Man: That's it.
Right now, if you ain't
strong enough, man,
you ain't gonna
survive our here, man.
I gotta get away from here.
'Cause I know them all.
I know who to get it from
and who not to get it from.
Jon: Yeah.
And I know if I go ask 'em,
if I, if I was
to have the money,
they'll give it to me
right there.
They don't care.
Jon: All right.
Let's get outta here, Deliris.
Yes.
Rob: I broke up with my girl.
Well, yeah, she left.
You know,
'cause we argue every day.
Anyway.
Hello, Mr. Mahoney?
Yeah, this is Rob.
I gotta speak to you.
Can you come over the house?
Okay, bye.
He said he'll see me in a bit.
- Jon: Who?
- Rob: My parole officer.
Jon: Why?
Because I wanna tell him
what happened, you know.
You know, 'cause it's
shit like that,
that, you know,
makes people do drugs.
You broke up with your woman.
It happens all the time.
Now, you gotta learn
how to deal with it
without goin' back
to your drugs, your alcohol,
or doing your crap
that you did before.
And I'm glad you contacted me
'cause that's important.
You know, you let me know
what's goin' on,
I'll come over,
make sure everything's...
At first,
I thought it was nothin'.
Why should I tell you,
it's nothin', but...
- Yeah, but...
- That is somethin' 'cause that could make me use.
Yeah. Somethin' on your mind.
You're hooked up with somebody,
and all of a sudden it ends.
You know, you get thinkin'.
But, you know,
give it a couple days,
see how you feel.
That said,
maybe you guys go back,
maybe you won't.
But if you don't,
then you just move on
and just continue the way
you've been livin',
which has been, uh,
clean and sober.
And, uh, you've been
on the right track.
- Are you Freddie?
- Freddie: Yes.
Officer Raquel Shafran:
Freddie? Wilfredo? What?
- Freddie: Freddie.
- Officer Shafran: Okay. Come in.
How's your health?
I mean, here he had
that you didn't feel well.
Freddie: I don't feel well.
I'm goin' through
a lot of pain every night.
Starts like...
4:00 or 5:00,
5 o'clock in the evening.
Cramps, stomach.
- My son...
- Mm-hmm.
He's going to this thing
called the Twilight,
- school at night...
- Okay.
Because he got caught
with a gun or robbery,
- some store. Okay?
- Okay.
And they don't
teach him nothin'.
And I wanted to know
if you can give me permission
to go to Newburgh, New York,
so I can go to the school
and see if I can arrange it
so I can get him back
in regular school.
Principal:
So I'll be right there.
You heard him. There you go.
He'll be in a second.
Mr. Rodriguez, how you doin'?
Martin LaMaza, principal.
Wilfredo.
We're gonna go over
to the office on this side
and we'll cover the material
that we're gonna discuss.
Excuse me, sir.
Just go through, uh...
Give me just
a little bit of, uh,
of background
on the fact that you,
you haven't been
with-with Wilfredo for a while.
And now, you're here
to help us out.
Well, ten years ago,
I committed a crime,
armed robbery, to be exact.
And, um, I went
to prison for ten years.
So when I, like,
left my son, he was, like,
real small at the time.
And, um...
I actually didn't see him
till, like, now, you know.
So I really didn't,
didn't raise him.
But, um, I spent
ten years in prison,
so I kinda, like,
know what prison's like.
And I got out,
and I don't want him
to take the same route I took
and end up in the same place
where I ended up at.
Jon: So, Deliris,
clean or not clean?
Clean.
Jon: Guarantee? Look me,
look me in the eye. Look.
- Clean?
- Clean.
I swear to God
I seen her shoot up.
You and the Black guy.
You went first
and he went second.
She did it in her right arm.
Jon: You got that?
Let's see the sleeve, Deliris.
- Let's see.
- Deliris: Hmm?
Jon: Right arm. Let's see
the right arm, Deliris.
Wait till we get
around the corner.
Yeah, she's high right now.
Man, can't you look
at a person eyes
and tell when their pupils
are dilated and stuff like that?
She's high for real.
I wanna see your right arm.
It was from a blood test.
Jon: Oh, let me see.
Kiky: Let me see your left arm.
Let's see your left arm.
What's that over there?
Move it this way.
- Deliris: Tape.
- No, this right here.
What's this right here?
Deliris: Oh, that's been there.
Jon: Deliris, they know
what track marks are?
Yeah. I used to have 'em.
If you do drugs one more time,
I can't live with you.
So you have to do this,
go back on drugs
or don't be with me.
Deliris: Bingo.
This is what kills you,
fuckin' drugs.
Jon: Rob?
- Yeah?
- Jon: What's happenin'? What...
The store is closin'.
It should be closed on the 15th,
but they'll probably
close a lot sooner
because they're
running out of merchandise.
Jon: What about your job?
I don't know. I don't know
if they're gonna keep me or not.
I gotta talk to the manager
when she comes.
She'll be here in about
an hour or somethin'.
Jon: Jesus Christ.
Wow, look at this.
Then I'm gonna have to go
look for another job, right?
- No.
- No?
We'll keep you here.
And then when this store closes,
you'll end up going
to another Eckerd
because we don't wanna
put you on the street.
Oh. Yeah, I told you, Jon.
Eckerd ain't just gonna
put people on the street.
Jon: Why-why you gonna keep him?
'Cause he's
a good worker. He's...
There's no reason
for him to leave.
He's never done anything wrong.
They're gonna keep Rob.
Rob will not be unemployed.
- Jon: Rob.
- What's up?
Jon: You're smokin'.
Yeah, I started smokin' again.
I was doin' good. 146 days.
- I quit like that.
- Jon: Yeah.
Now, for the past week,
I've been smokin'.
But I'm gonna stop again.
Jon: Where are we goin' now?
There's this place
that helps you get jobs.
- Jon: A job? What...
- Yeah.
Yeah, I got fired from Eckerd.
I told you.
- Jon: You got fired?
- I got fired.
They called me in the day
before yesterday, right?
- Jon: Yeah.
- Because, um...
the assistant manager
knew my background.
And she didn't say nothin'
for the whole year.
Then all of a sudden,
she tells the district manager.
Then they said, "All right,
we have to let you go."
Jon: And this place?
This place helps you find a job,
- and they're good.
- Jon: Yeah?
My parole officer
called the guy.
I got an appointment
with Lanney.
Okay? Only smoked half.
You can take a seat,
fill this out.
When you're done, I'll get Mike.
He'll interview you. Okay?
"Have you ever been
convicted of a felony
in the last seven years?"
What should I do? Lie?
Now, I got child support.
Matter of fact,
I bring the letters
in case you need to see it.
And I'm saying, you know,
I honestly been thinking
about telling you,
send me back, man, 'cause...
Officer Shafran: $50 a month?
Freddie: Yes.
Officer Shafran: That's
what you're crying about?
$50 a month?
Freddie: Well, it's, you
know, it's not just that...
Officer Shafran:
That's not a lot of money.
You know, every...
you know, it's not just that.
You know, if it was that...
if that was all I had to pay,
I'd be fine with that.
Officer Shafran: This is life.
If you can't live with this,
you're gonna have
a lot of problems.
When everybody's
hittin' me left and right,
you know what I'm sayin'?
I'll be like, I'm confused.
I'm saying... I'm not...
I'm not even used to bein' out.
You're not staying
down here, are you?
- Rob: No.
- I hope not.
I'm... I don't wanna
stay in Newark.
Officer: No, I don't blame you.
That's where you get
all your trouble from.
Yeah.
Let me show you Rob's picture,
if I still have it.
- Jon: That you, Rob?
- Rob: Yeah, it's me.
Officer: She was just in
here, too, not too long ago.
- Rob: Deliris.
- Officer: She was just in here.
Officer 2: How about a
Polaroid, a goodbye Polaroid?
- Yeah, a group picture.
- Officer 2: A goodbye Polaroid?
Oh, a group picture.
Rob: A good picture.
I'm not standing there.
I'm not a criminal.
I'm not a criminal.
I'm not standing there.
I'll stand in the middle.
- Man 1: Come on, Robert.
- Man 2: Ready?
"Life of Crime," part six.
No flash.
- All that shit for nothin'.
- I got film. I got film.
- Officer: Take care of yourself.
- Rob: All right.
Bye-bye.
Jon: So what do you think, John?
Does he have a shot?
Yeah, he has a shot.
As long as he doesn't
go back to Newark,
go out, hang with the same guys
that got him in trouble
to begin with,
he's got a shot.
Jon: How big a shot? This big?
Little bigger. About 50/50 here.
That's what it is. As long
as he doesn't come back here.
That's the whole thing.
You can't come back to this town
to hang out with the same guys
that got you in trouble.
And you're gonna
wind up in trouble.
- Rob: Hey, Deliris.
- Oh, man.
So you still gettin' high?
A little bit.
But you're not addicted, right?
Shit.
Why don't you stop?
I'm clean so far.
- So far.
- So far.
I ain't fuckin' around no more.
Shit, I don't even steal, man.
I ain't doin' nothin'.
- Deliris: This is my home.
- Jon: Yeah?
Deliris: Temporarily.
Robert, this is Ruben.
Ruben, Robert.
Rob: Hey, I remember that.
When you was younger, huh?
Deliris: Yep, high school.
Rob: You could still
look like that again.
Stop doin' drugs.
I know. I want to.
That's it. You can
go to a detox, right?
- Deliris: Uh-huh.
- And, um...
and get clean.
And as soon as you come
back out on the street,
you're gonna start using again.
Remember when you went
to the drug program
and you got, you know,
like nice and plump and fat?
- Deliris: Mm-hmm.
- Rob: You was lookin' good.
You had quit smokin', right?
- Mm-hmm.
- Rob: But...
you see how positive
you was then?
But I bet you wasn't going
to meetings or nothin'.
And eventually
you started usin' drugs, right?
Deliris: Yep.
I'll see ya.
- Nice seein' you.
- Okay. Ruben, right?
Okay, Ruben.
- Nice seeing you again.
- You better stop.
- I need to.
- Rob: Okay.
Jon: Freddie. What is goin' on?
Life is goin' on.
The same old life.
Officer Shafran: I'm havin'
problems with Freddie.
He hasn't been reporting
like he's supposed to.
Right now,
I have no idea where he is.
He's probably
not staying at home
'cause he knows
that I'm going out there.
I'm gonna go
pick him up if he's there.
I have no choice but to issue
a warrant for Freddie.
Who knows what he's capable of
doing out there in the streets.
Freddie: ♪ New York, New
York, it's a wonderful... ♪
Jon: Freddie, if-if you
don't turn yourself in,
I think you'd die on the street.
Well, either way,
if I don't die on the street,
where am I gonna die, in prison?
I've been on the run now for,
what, two days, three days?
And, uh it's been rough.
It's not, it's not easy,
you know.
'Cause...
I can't go to my family's house.
Where else am I supposed to go?
Backin' up into this alley
because I'm gonna shoot me
some dope in the car.
Get the sickness off me.
I let everybody down.
I let myself down mainly.
Shit.
Jon: What are you doin'?
Puttin' my bags
in the fuckin' car.
- Jon: Where are you goin'?
- Back to Jersey, I guess.
Jon: And? To do what?
I don't know.
Find another place to go to.
Jon:
You better turn yourself in.
No, not now. Not today.
Jon: That means you're
gonna get high again, right?
Obviously.
What can I do, Jon?
I'm sick.
Jon: You gotta have the courage
to turn yourself in, Freddie.
It's a question
of courage. Right?
If you go out on the street
and get high again,
you're gonna die.
You're not gonna make it.
I don't know, Jon.
I don't know what to do, man.
- Rob: This is Gator.
- I'm Gator.
Rob: This is my roommate.
I let him move in like
about four months ago.
He helps me pay the rent.
You know what I mean?
Gator was drug-free.
When he moved in,
I told him he couldn't
mess with drugs
and this and that.
- You know, "You gotta go to AA."
- Jon: Uh-huh.
And then what happened, Gator?
Came back,
started playing
with the drugs again
and, uh, well,
I got my habit back,
but I'm tryin'
to get clean again.
Rob's helping me
out with that, so...
- Jon: What's the habit?
- Heroin.
- Jon: How much?
- I'm doing right now
about two bags a day, but...
Picked up
a couple of my buddies.
You know, scorpion.
It's not bad. It's...
That's the same empty bag
you left the other day,
scorpio or scorp...
Gator: This here ain't
gonna bother you, is it?
- Rob: Don't bother me.
- Gator: Okay.
'Cause, you know,
I don't wanna see you
go back out there 'cause...
Rob: I quit.
I stopped.
I didn't quit. I stopped.
Let me see
if I get tempted, Jon.
Gator: You hear that sound?
That's like, mm. It's coming in.
Rob: Don't bother me, Jon.
Don't bother me at all.
Freddie:
I'm on my fucking way to jail.
I'm supposed to
be there at 3:30.
What time is it? It's 3:51.
I still haven't even got
my fuckin' dick sucked.
That's gonna take
another half hour.
Psst.
How much money you got?
I don't know. You gonna shoot
me up if I get the coke?
- Freddie: Yeah, hell, yeah.
- All right.
And you know
I don't have any veins.
You're gonna have
to go in my neck.
No problem.
Woman: You fuckin' spic.
I'll be outside, 'cause
my boyfriend don't want me...
I don't want him
to think that, you know...
See, I wanna...
to suck my fuckin' dick.
I can't do it, man, 'cause...
Freddie: Fuckin' girl, man.
She's gonna get
all fuckin' coked up.
- Woman: Fuckin'...
- Freddie: Let me check on that side, huh?
I don't see shit.
Damn, I can't...
see shit out there.
It's too small.
I'm gonna blow up.
Wanna get that?
It's small, mami.
Ow, ow, ow.
Okay, don't move.
Don't move right there.
Just hold it right there.
- All the way, right?
- Check back.
- Go back? All the way?
- Woman: Yeah.
Okay. Don't fuckin'
go out on me, mami.
I won't.
Freddie: Your heart starts beatin'
fuckin' thousand miles an hour.
Now put this shit in.
- Okay.
- Take it out.
- Take it out, Freddie.
- It's done.
See, I ain't even
get my fuckin' dick sucked
'cause
Wait. Let me put my shit on.
Let me put my shit on, Fred.
My boyfriend's there.
Freddie: Sleepin' pills.
I'm packin' 'em so that way
I take 'em to the county jail
'cause I can't sleep at night.
That's exactly
what I'm doin'. Bah-bah.
The only way I'm gonna be
able to sleep at night, kid.
Jon: Who taught you
how to do that stuff, Freddie?
You learn this shit in prison.
Man.
It's hurtin'.
That's just too bad now.
- Hold on a second. Hold on a second.
- Freddie: Come on.
Man: Freddie, have a seat in
this chair right here, okay?
Officer Shafran: Just relax.
- I got it.
- Yeah.
Freddie: Don't ever think
you got it in the bag
like I thought I had it.
There's nobody
in the world could tell me
that they get clean
and stop usin'.
And I don't care if it's
10, 15 years from now,
they do it one time,
they gonna do it every day.
That shit is unstoppable, man.
Officer Shafran: So in the end,
I guess it is a successful story
just 'cause you
turned yourself in today.
It'll be successful if when
I max out, I'm still livin'.
That's when it'll be successful.
He'll be comfortable here.
Tomorrow morning,
they'll close the coffin up
and take him to church.
That's about it.
Detective Al DiNatale:
I'm Detective Al DiNatale,
Trenton Police Department.
- How you doin', Al?
- How you doin'?
- Officer Mahoney: Good.
- I'm gonna walk you through
the scene here and, uh,
let you know
exactly what we found.
Rob was found
laying on the floor over here
with his head up
against the refrigerator.
If you look down here,
you'll see the syringe needle
next to his left leg.
Officer Mahoney: This was
gonna be a success story.
We felt he
straightened himself out.
Obviously, it didn't
work out that way.
- Waste of life.
- Officer Mahoney: Yeah.
Coroner: We have here a body
of 41-years-old Robert Steffey,
found at home in a state of
full bloat decomposition,
found with a syringe present
in his left inner elbow.
One hundred positive
that his cause of death
is as a result of his
one-time shot of heroin.
The heroin that was found
in his system was very pure?
Coroner: Yes.
A hot shot, which would be
a shot that you will die from,
is the ultimate high.
And the gentleman or person
who sold him this shot
will be the hot person
on the street,
the dealer that
everyone is looking for.
They wanna buy from him
because this gentleman
supposedly got
the ultimate high.
Officer Mahoney:
He knew what he was doin'.
He knew heroin
got him in prison before,
got him in trouble,
now got him dead.
That's a sad ending
to the life of Robert Steffey.
Don't shoot dope...
'cause you're gonna end up
in the morgue.
Host: I wanna introduce
you the Mistress of Honor,
who's an absolute
unadulterated miracle...
Man: Right here. Right here.
Host: Let's hear it for Deliris.
Our sister.
Deliris: My name is Deliris,
and I'm a grateful,
blessed recovering addict.
All: Hey, Deliris.
I love my recovery today.
Let me tell ya I was born
and raised in Newark.
I have three beautiful kids.
I graduated from high school.
I went to college.
I had a job
with the City of Newark.
The drugs stole
all that from me.
For 17 years, I shot drugs.
When I OD'ed in my room,
nobody knew where I was at.
All I wanted to do was die.
And you know what?
A voice told me,
"Help yourself,
that I will help you."
And ever since, I've been clean.
If I could do it,
anybody could do it.
That's all I can say.
Host: If Deliris can do it?
All: I can do it!
Host: If Deliris can do it?
All: I can do it!
Host: If Deliris can do it?
All: I can do it!
Deliris: Today is Mother's Day.
I've had a long day today,
but at least
she keeps me company.
It's my first Mother's Day
without my mother.
She passed away
in July of last year.
In the old days
when I used to feel like this,
I used to just go get high
and don't feel nothin'.
'Cause that's what
people do with drugs.
They use drugs
so they won't feel pain.
And I did that
for a lot of years.
My mother was more a mother
to my kids than I was.
I'm not with my kids today
because there's still
pain with them.
Jon, you remember me?
I'm Kiky. I'm, uh, now 32.
Last time you saw me, I believe
was about eight or nine.
And I'm definitely not
the same person.
Not at all.
I'm happy with my life now,
I'm tryin' to pick up
the pieces now.
I wanna focus on me,
focus on my passions,
my dreams, my goals,
like those other things
I have in front of me.
And those are the things
I'm gonna succeed in one day.
Deliris:
This is my oldest son, Charlie.
Jon:
Those are the guys that used to
lock your mother up
all the time, Charlie.
I know, we playin' against 'em.
- Jon: Really?
- Newark PD.
Hey, guys. My name is Deliris.
Um...
I used to be
a heavy drug addict,
and I was in and outta jail,
in and outta jail
'cause of my addiction.
But I thank God
that he rescued me
and today I have 12 years clean.
- Congratulations.
- Deliris: Thank you.
Officer: Glad you're out here.
We're glad to have you.
- Deliris: Thank you.
- All right.
Players: Oh!
They know police gonna
whip their ass.
Hey, Deliris.
Deliris, this game is won
on and off the field,
but you're the real winner.
All right?
- Thank you.
- All right.
I get to take a picture
with Newark Police Department
instead of being in a lineup.
- Jon: Ta-da!
- All right, guys. Thank you.
Thank you.
Deliris: That's the projects
that they closed down.
They found too many
bodies in there.
This is Pennington Court.
I ran around here
looking for drugs.
Now I try to help
people get clean.
What's goin' on, Jodi?
- Hey, how you doin'?
- Hi.
Deliris: I remember you
was just a little kid.
You was here with Rob
when he was still alive,
during the film.
I'm hope in a good way.
We came here today to see you,
to see what we could do for you.
But it's up to you.
I can't force you.
Okay?
All right, let me get a hug.
- Stay strong, okay?
- I sure will.
Jodi, I'm gonna go see
if I see somebody
that needs help, okay?
- You take care now. Okay.
- You, too.
I remember you.
I've been homeless
over, over 30 years.
I need help.
Deliris: What happened?
What happened?
I made a mistake with my life.
And I can't get no help.
Deliris: I'll try to
get you into a program.
Just don't give up.
Don't give up.
I know this guy right here.
I used to sell him drugs.
Yeah.
When are you gonna get clean?
I was tryin' to get clean.
I was clean for a good while
except then I got hurt again.
I'm not on the needles
and stuff like that.
Once in a while,
I had a little...
I'm glad I'm not on that.
I'm gonna pray for you, okay?
Prayer do, do work.
- Okay.
- Deliris: All right.
- You take care now.
- Okay.
Thank you.
Deliris: It never stops.
Woman: Deliris, it is
my distinct pleasure
to recognize you today.
Deliris is such
a strong role model to many.
So, Deliris,
from sick and suffering
to a strong survivor,
you are a miracle.
God bless you.
Deliris: My main purpose
is to help another addict
get clean like I did,
because we can only keep
what we have by giving it away.
And I'm so grateful
that I'm alive today
because it was me
and two other guys.
And both of them
overdosed on drugs.
I'm the only one
that's left today alive.
And if Deliris can do it,
I can do it too!
If Deliris can do it?
All: I can do it!
If Deliris can do it?
All: I can do it!
This is my daughter Kiky.
This is Cayden,
my six-year-old grandson.
Charlie, my oldest son...
Thank you.
Deliris:
and my oldest grandson.
- I love you. I'm proud of you.
- Deliris: I love you.
I knew you could do it, Ma.
Good job.
- Love you.
- Love you, too.
All right, let's do this.
Woman: This was her baby.
Chimo: I want people to remember
my mother for her energy,
and all the positivity she had,
and wanting to help others.
I'm proud of my mother. She
changed her life around, a lot.
Gotta be with family.
Gotta keep it up.
Kiky:
When people think of my mother,
I want them to remember
that recovery's possible.
She did it
for the past 13 years.
And she helped
as many people as she can.
Kiky:
I'll never stop loving you.
Yep.
Celebrant: Hail Mary, full of
grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed are thou amongst women
and blessed is the fruit
of thy womb Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners
now and at the hour
of our death. Amen.
Chimo: She was able to tell her story.
Not many could do that.
She fought really hard.
And I just wish
I would have known
that it was so long
that she was fighting
for someone to talk to
with everything going on
with this COVID virus.
I had no idea
it's been three months
that she didn't have a meeting
or someone to talk to
that understood her
on that level.
As a child,
I was always embarrassed.
But now as an adult,
everyone has their story,
and I loved her very much.
I really did, and I always
will love my mother.
Kiky: She was an amazing woman.
She's helped so many people.
I will always
carry you in my heart.
I love you always, Mom.