Le secret du Chevalier d'Éon (1959) - full transcript

Once upon a time, there lived
seven charming girls.

Everyday they returned from their walk

acoompanied by their governess

to Chateau d'Eon, where

a very rich old man,
without a direct heir,

was concerned about his offspring.

The story of the mysterious chevalier,

whose adventures so intrigued contemporaries,

started that very day

at 5 o'clock in the afternoon.

Girls, curtsy!



Only birdies,
not a single gander!

Go on, go on!

Well, get a move on!
My eyes are too dazzled!

Nephew!

Well, any news?
- Still the same!

Things are at their peak.

Don't fret, uncle,
this time it will be a boy!

You've promised me this seven times,
and the result - nothing but skirts!

This time I will pray.
- I hope so!

I have just dictated your will.

A reasonable precaution!

Your son will be my sole heir!

But...
- Quiet!

If this is another of your mistakes,
my state will pass to the Capuchins!



Uncle, you will ruin me!

I've always had bad luck!
- Yes, in love, like in cards!

No, no! To the Capuchins!
To the Capuchins!

They, at least, will pray for me.

Baron! Come quickly!

Is it a boy?
- We don't know yet.

Well, go on, sir!
Check your wife's nappy!

And the future of your house.

And remember that I am impatient!

Well, madame?

We will call her Genevieve.

Georgette, we must use a screw.

Do you hear me? A screw.
Fasten it to her nightshirt.

Your girl will be a boy, madame.

But for how long?

That old idiot will not die yet.

He is waiting for you
to give me a son!

Crikey, and here I am with 6 boys!

Uncle!
- Well, is it true?

Here he is, your heir!

Well, at last!

It's obvious to everyone
he's not another of those unfortunate girls!

I will call him Charles!

I will raise him myself
and make him a soldier!

Isn't he a little too young?

Quiet, you fool!
20 years will soon pass!

The proof?

Here it is 20 years later.

King Louis XV rules France from Versailles.

In Europe, they talk a great deal
about peace and prepare for war.

Reinette,

I'm about to start believing
that being king is no fun at all.

Louis, where's this coming from?

You've never known anything else!

Оh, I'm fed up!

But here you have enough entertainments
for anyone!

On Monday - games,

Tuesday - French comedy,
Wednesdaу - Italian,

Thursday - tragedy,

Friday - games, Saturday - cabinet,
Sunday - games...

Yes, and the following week -
it starts all over again!

Monday - concert,
Tuesday - French comedy, etc. etc.

How monotonous it all is!

Perhaps you need a little break?

Well, of course.

Ah, how much I have on my mind!

If Elizabeth had only signed that treaty
I offered her!

Peace would have been safeguarded
for a quarter of a century.

Аnd afterwards?

Well, "apres moi, le deluge"!

I wish I knew what he is up to now,

my Prussian cousin.

This water is too hot!

I'm bored when there's no war.

So, Ambassador,

has the empress agreed at last

to sign the treaty that I offered?

This will allow me to destroy
those damned French!

Believe me, Your Majesty,
I am doing my best

to convince the queen.

Is it really that difficult?!

Mr Dexter?

Reports from my secret agents show

that the queen hates France,

the French and their king.

Then you must exploit such
a wonderful disposition.

What are you waiting for?

Your secret police chief must have
told you,

surely, about how temperamental
Elizabeth can be?

I've never hidden from His Majesty
how strange the queen is,

quick to hate, and to love.

To convince her,
you need an exceptional Ambassador.

Тhen get back to St Petersburg, sir!

And don't bother to return
without that treaty in your pocket!

Аnd you, Frakat, scratch my back,
or I'll have you hanged!

To the left! That's it...

And don't scratch me, doctor!

Why assault me like that?
These women's whims!

When all's said and done,
we have friends in the Russian court.

Do you trust...

Ivanov?

Your Majesty, policemen
never trust anyone.

But who could pay him more than you?

Or betray him more quickly,
if he deceives us?

Тherefore I believe that he is totally
devoted to us,

and will not fail to take the opportunity

to advance your case with the queen.

Good! Now you, Grisha!

Оh no! No, Grisha!
You're so clumsy!

Well, Ivanov, have you found him?
- No, Elizabeth Petrovna.

The French musician left St Petersburg

without pipes and timpani.
- It can't be!

It's impossible!
What will I do now?!

Look at this! Trust a Frenchman,
and this is what happens!

What a fool I am!
I treated him like a prince,

showered him with gifts,
obeyed him as if he was my lord.

And in thanks he leaves,
without any warning!

What a fool...
- Calm down, Еlizabeth, my dear.

This Frenchman doesn't warrant the
attention of the Great Queen of all Russia!

Well,

from now on, not another Frenchman
will be admitted to court!

They are all spies!
You hear me, Ivanov?

Even the French Ambassador?
- Even him. He's so boring.

Elizabeth Petrovna!

With this turn of affairs, it seems
to me the appropriate time

to sign the treaty with Prussia.

The situation in Europe becomes more
delicate with each passing day.

Оh, you and your alliances!

Holy Russia doesn't need alliances.

She doesn't need anyone else.
Ivanov!

Good work!
We'll discuss this treaty later.

20 years have also passed at the chateau.

War was getting closer.

Which one? We don't know yet.
Some kind will be next.

The first regiment of dragoons
on the way to Paris traverse the estate.

Count Antoine d'Eon, lord of Beaumont,

invites the officers to a banquet.

After dining, the dragoons dance
with the 14 daughters of Pascal,

for after the birth of Charles-Genevieve

they had seven more new and charming girls.

Blanch is again in the family way.

Hope being always the last to die.

As of today, only four of
the ladies of Eon

have been married off.

Careful, girls, not so fast!
You may fall!

Hopefully we can marry off a couple more.

Ah, poor little Genevieve!
- Charles must remain a boy!

Aren't you dancing, boy?

With one of my sisters?
Why would I bother?

Yes, fair enough.

I admit, I prefer more masculine pleasures.

Uh, there's a time for everything!

Didn't you teach me how to hunt boar?

Well, at my age and in my condition,

I couldn't even show you
how to tickle girls!

Let me go! Let me go!

These provincials don't understand
our Parisian dances.

You're a real rake!
- No, no!

Just a gallant man,
too sensitive to your spell.

Don't touch me!
- Well, give me another slap.

Well, who's going to stop me? Who?

I will, sir!

Bravo, Charles! Well said.

Go play somewhere else, boy!

My nephew will teach you a lesson, sir!

An old bull and a calf - a great team!

You are getting involved in a
bad scenario.

Don't worry, colonel,
no blood will be spilt.

I'll merely disarm him gently.

If life is dear to you, watch out!

Don't fight over me,
it's not worth it!

Calm down, sweetie,
we are not going to fight.

The Chevalier d'Eon is just going
to kneel and ask my forgiveness.

I challenge you to a duel.
Defend yourself!

Count!

Baron Bernard Turke de Bayern -

the most skillful fighter in the regiment,
the best sword in France!

Your nephew is taking a great risk!

Colonel, this is our affair.

Come on, chevalier!
- Don't worry, colonel!

I promise your officer will have
nothing wounded but his vanity!

Oh, these fighters!
- Defend yourself!

Here is your sword!
And here is your wound!

Excuse me.
It's just a small scratch.

Not bad, sonny!

You couldn't have done that
under the charge of your idiot father.

Count! His Majesty needs a sword like this!

It would be an honour!
- For our regiment as well!

He will be a wonderful dragoon!

Wonderful dragoon!
- It's all Uncle Antoine's fault!

Living to be a 100 years old,
at his age, it's indecent!

Give me that uniform!
Enough masquerade, enough lying!

No good will come of this!
- This is a mortal sin!

Where are you going?
- To your uncle.

To kill him?
- I'll tell him the truth.

And then goodbye inheritance,
what will happen to my sisters?

To Leah's marriage?

Only debt and poverty would await.

Whose fault is it?!
I always wanted a son.

And you have one.

She's lost her head!

I will become a real dragoon!

Just like him!

Look at me!

I've been taught how to ride
in any weather...

to kill deer with a knife,
and bears with a sword...

to make my bed like a musketeer, dammit!

I swear like a man.

Forgive us...
- I drink like a fish!

And why did I have all this training?

Just so you could say:
"enough masquerade!"?

It's too late now.

If I change clothes now,
I'll just be another woman.

You unhappy lunatic!
You are not a man!

But I am not a woman anymore.
- So what are you going to do?

Carry on.
- Are you leaving with those louts?

Thanks to you, I can take care of myself.

Well there, is that rookie coming down!?

The service of the king will not wait.

Don't worry about your honour, father,
it is in no danger.

But what about your chastity, Genevieve,
in the midst of all those dragoons?!

It is not like a wound in battle, mother.
From this we do not die.

My savings.

My poor little girl!

Here is the result of your invention!

Yes, yes.

Forward!

Аh, here is Оsser!

A nice town!

Last year, Bernard, remember
Amanda and her nuns?

They were only too happy
for a little roll in the hay.

Oh, yeah!

My appetite for another fumble
is stirring.

And you, chevalier?

Oh, monsieur, I'm not hungry.
- He clearly has no appetite.

Anyway, he has other fish to fry.
- What's that?

Find somewhere quiet and I'll show you.

You must give me a rematch.
- I'm not fighting a friend.

No, do you hear that?

I'm not your friend.

Just the opposite,
I'm yours!

Well, you'll have your rematch!

Providing that you are ahead of me
when we reach the inn.

Forward!

Get a move on!

"THE FEEDING CALF"

Grimaud, what's going on?

We can't proceed, Countess.

The horses are exhausted. But
here's a pleasant inn.

Excellent, Countess!

But this is impossible!

A dragoon!

How handsome he is!

And a second!

Not too bad either!

Ah, here you are, at last!

Acrobat, that's what they call you!
You find it funny?

Yes. Because you disagree.

It's good these troops have arrived.
They will protect me.

Grimaud, we'll leave tomorrow morning.
- Very good, Countess.

Madame!

You'll pay for this!

Drinks! Drinks!
- Here, here!

It's usually so quiet here!

How fortunate that I met you.

A drink to the Countess,

for bringing us together.

And for her grace in providing
this meal.

Thank you, gentlemen.

Good health!
- Good health!

Your presence inspires in me

a tremendous feeling of security!
- Madame,

in our company

the only risk for a beautiful woman
is being raped.

Wow, what a compliment!

Calm down, sonny,
I am talking about a gentle violence.

Pretty women, presented with us,
don't resist!

You should direct your charms
at dishwashers!

Oh you...!
- Oh no, no!

I do not doubt your word.

But the day will come,
and I will be there,

when you meet a woman capable
of standing up for herself!

One of your victims, no doubt.

With our small chevalier, madame,
your protection is completely assured!

I know! I've been told
that the chevalier

is great with a sword.

And I've seen with my own eyes that
he holds in the saddle like a centaur!

And have you been told
how he is with the girls?

Not yet. But I am starting to feel
that I can trust him.

Monsieur d'Eon, will you escort me
to my room?

Drink! Pour.

Officer!

Just look!
How sweet she is!

Come on, pour!

Where is your room?
- Here.

Don't be shocked, chevalier.

Go and wait, in there, in my room.

All will be explained to you later.

The king's service!

You know what it is,
the harassment of a dragoon?

Oh, you cutie!

Have you ever seen a dragoon?

What coquetry!

Excuse me.

It would suit you very much,

but I prefer you in uniform.

So do I.

I'll explain it all to you.
I've been traveling a long way.

In another country on the king's service,
I stole some papers.

But I've been betrayed,
and they're after me.

Contact the authorities!

Secret missions must remain secret,
chevalier.

And your handsome appearance
makes me think I can trust you.

Your dragoons should secretly escort
me to Versailles.

But I am not in command.
They're...

"In the name of the king, all
the conduct of the bearer of this letter,

is carried out according to my order
and for the good of France. Louis."

And if the king will be grateful

then his servant will also
show her gratitude

to the gallant chevalier!

Believe me, madame, that the satisfaction
of carrying out my duty...

Indeed, but...

Can you really leave me on my own
tonight?

My enemies are here.
They are hunting me.

Will you not protect me?

Allow me some time to deserve your favour.

Who's there?
- Open! On order of the king!

You again?
- Quiet!

Get dressed and alert everyone
that we leave in half an hour.

We're leaving? Where?

Meet in an hour on the road to Tours.

There somebody will meet you,
and you will escort them to Versailles.

You're keen on her, huh?

Make yourself decent,
my friend, and hurry it up!

The king is waiting on your efforts.

The king, the king...

What's this all about?
At this hour?

Nothing to worry about.
An order from the king. To your horses!

Wait for me and keep an eye on the yard.

Ready? Forward!

I need to know what time that lady
is leaving tomorrow morning.

Go and ask her.

Thank you.

Madame, they need to know
what time you're leaving tomorrow?

Not like that!

Well, it's so I can wake you.

Don't wake me,
I want a long sleep.

Good night, madame!

Was that okay?
- Go, you fool.

We can relax.

Nothing will be happening tonight.

Baron, go take a look.

Here she is, that dancing goose!

Но!.. Ho!

Go get your people and the horses!

That bitch thinks she's outfoxed me.

This time she won't escape!

Forward!

Oh, you! Come back for your beating!

It was a deception!

I have to find her!

This is all that remains
of the beautiful Countess!

At least we have delayed her.

We've lost one pawn in the King's game.
Go!

France!...
Look out, your coffee is about to erupt!

What about you, Rene'!

What must the Marquis Monval
think of you interrupting

when she has been though so much
to bring us this!

If you're so appreciative,
ask her to sit down.

Only half a cup for me, marquis.

No, a full cup!
It is delicious coffee!

Imagine, all the way from London!

Damn it!

It may cost us our soul,
but we will buy coffee from the English.

All men are the same, kings or not!

Imagine...

Our cousin Frederick
has plenty to say for himself!

Listen to this!

"And Elizabeth Petrovna -
that arrogant whore!"

That woman's happy only in bed
with good company.

A couple of good tumbles,

and she'll sign our alliance,
because Ivanov is our agent.

If Elizabeth saw this...

Russia would no longer be friends
with Prussia.

Well, then..

Here is your messenger.

It needs a man.

But Ivanov will not allow a Frenchman
near the Empress.

I should go myself!

To see this arrogant whore?

Really, aren't things difficult enough here?
- It's no joke, madame.

Russia is close to going to war with us.

Oh but you are invincible, my dear!

I only want gentle victories.

You are already called beloved!

If I can prevent further slaughter,
I will become more so.

You don't talk like a king.

You should know that your king is human too.

Oh Louis!
I meant no offence.

If Russia wants war...
- Let them fight Prussia!

Fine! The Prussians will certainly
make good enemies.

Frederick forgets that Elizabeth
is the daughter of Peter the Great.

And I don't like the way
he talks about women.

He must be short, cunning and ugly.

Where can I find the man
who can accomplish this mission?

Peace or war will lie in his hands.

He will need guile and strength,

the soul of a woman and
the heart of a soldier.

Sir,

you have received these papers

only because of the Chevalier d'Eon.

Yes, I know, madame,
you have already told me this.

In my cause,
the chevalier impersonated me.

You, madame? How inconvenient!

He must be handsome?
- Too divine!

Sir, if you desire to entrust
this mission to a man

and only a woman can get close
to the Empress,

the Chevalier could be useful to you.

I don't believe it!

He is more feminine than me.
- Oh Louis!

If this Empress cannot tell the difference
between a man and a woman,

then so much the worse for Russia!

Tell me, Reinette, can this young man
carry off this deception?

What do you think?
- I see, first of all, a handsome gentleman.

I have been told you have a fondness
for the clothes of the fairer sex,

is it true?
- Sire,

I had to change clothes
in my sisters' dresses.

You leave tomorrow.

I will send a letter alerting the queen

that I'm sending her my favourite,
Mademoiselle de Beaumont,

plus a few books that I hope
she will find entertaining.

I hope she will be entertained by the books
rather by what she finds under the skirts!

Stop it, Reinette,
you'll make the Chevalier blush.

Don't you think that
Mademoiselle de Beaumont

will get a better reception if,
instead of bringing some old books

she brings the height of Parisian fashion?

Ah, the woman's approach!

Those barbarians must certainly be tired
of their animal skins.

Yes, but unfortunately there's no time.
- To have dresses made?

Am I not the most faithful of servants?

I am ready to empty my closets.

That should fill quite a bit
of luggage.

Having strengthened the position
of the state,

I would only ask that my couturier...

This gift will cost me a great deal!

Oh Louis, you wouldn't send your
mistress about all naked!

My sacrifice doesn't touch your heart?

My heart?
My heart and my wallet!

Well, okay, your ploy has worked!

Here is the letter that you must give
to the Empress with your own hands.

In a sense, I am entrusting you
with the future of France.

Whatever happens,
do not forget this!

In short, the way to peace
lies through the bed!

Madame!
- Oh, don't get angry!

It's where we are born!

And I love you even more when you try
to be a good king.

Choose from your friends,
sir, a companion.

Two swords are better than one.

Sire!
- What?

I was so happy having joined
the squadron at Lauren.

And now my service pulls you
in another direction!

Yes, and change into a woman...
- Don't worry yourself!

I have some charming dresses,
they will be perfect for you.

A certain someone

will show you the latest models.

There is a very practical room.

And my sheets are made from
the finest batiste.

Come on, Louis,
let's give him some privacy!

Goodbye, sir!

We love those like you,
who truly serve us!

With your most secret weapon!

His Majesty asked me to give you
this letter for your security,

which was mine and of which
you made such good use.

I'm so happy that I can take something
that belonged to you.

Depending on you,
you can receive more!

I've thought about it from the
very first evening we met!

So have I.

Why didn't you tell me this before?

I will dedicate my life to you!

Let us take this opportunity...

Madame!

I will not accept a reward,
having not yet fulfilled the mission.

You will be my most gentle reward.

I think that you have a bad opinion
of me.

I wouldn't dare!

How would I be able to leave you afterwards?

I would die, madame!

You use our own weapons against us!

Charles, you are not like other men!

Well, no!

I simply love you more.

Other men are such fools,

so coarse,
so full of themselves...

They have no tender feelings,

tender wishes...

Their only thought is how
to get under our skirts.

Madame!

Yes. Take that Bernard de Mayenne.

He's a good example!

We had barely left on the road for Paris,

at the same time as you were risking
your life...

He tried it on with you?

They all try it on with me.

Bernard is a handsome man,
I could have yielded.

But the memory of you
helped me resist him.

Well, he will pay for this!

So, take your revenge!
- What are you, madame!

You don't want me to behave like him?
I'm not like him!

You are completely different.
- Excuse me, madame!

It will not happen!
- Why?

I will not allow insults
to the woman I love!

You say you love, and you leave?
Where are you going?

To deal with him,
to protect you from him.

Besides, I need a companion for my mission.

Goodbye, madame.

Bernard!

Bernard!
- Why're you here, lily of the valley?

What do you look like?

Excuse me, I'm waiting for a lady
who finds this costume most appealing.

An animal skin?
- Someday I'll show you.

We are to go by carriage to Strasbourg.
Order of the king!

What? To Strasbourg? Why?

State secret.

We meet at 8am
at the coach-house in Versailles.

My brunette!

Listen, are you sure about these four?

They are the best animals in my stable.

I wouldn't send you on this journey
with anything less.

So, when do you leave?

We're waiting for my master.
- It's a long way!

Yes.

Madame!
- Is this my carriage?

Yes, madame.

Hey, my friend! What's up?

Don't you recognise me?

Is that you, lily of the valley?

What are we waiting for?
Open the door.

And lower the step.

Look where you're treading!

You know how to hurt hands, you bully.

You yourself are the bully!

Let's go!

"You know how to hurt hands, bully"

You saw that lady!
- I know that lady.

Show me their route. Quickly!

Here it is. Tonight they'll be
in Dorman.

In the Champagne?
- Yes, here.

Please, madame.

I have a very nice room free

and stables for the horses.

Good. And my driver?

He can sleep in the stables, madame,
he'll be like a prince in there!

Perfect!
- Indeed!

Bernard, see to the horses,
they are exhausted, the poor things!

Leave to me, madame!

Give him some bread and cheese.

Yes, madame.
- And a small toddy.

You're too kind, madame!

It's an historic room.

My late father told me that the old king

was once going to stay there.

But the enemy wouldn't wait,
and war got in the way.

"A small toddy"!

Madame is esconsed in her room.

The servant is asleep in the stables,
but the inn is packed.

Let's wait for a quieter place.
We can still overtake them.

We still have time.
Keep them under surveillance.

Shit!

Damned animal!

Goodbye, sir.

Well?
- It's that one.

Of course.

No thank you?
- There's no time.

Are you there?
- Naturally.

Of course. Did you sleep well?

And you?
- As well as you can in a stable.

Open up!

Open, or I'll knock the door down!
- I'm dressing!

That's it,
I'm kicking it in.

Damn it!

It can't be!
- Are you there, Bernard?

Yes...

Yes, I'm here.

Did you say something?
- Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

So, what is it? What do you want?

To find out if your grace would be
ready to depart in half an hour.

Why have we stopped?

I'm afraid your grace will have to
put her feet upon the ground.

The wheel is about to break.

Grace, grace...

What are you up to? We are alone.

A foolish habit.

There you go, see?
- Yes, are you crazy?

Your grace should appreciate my caution.

What are we going to do?

Try to locate a nearby village

and find someone who knows
how to repair carriages.

Bernard!
- Yes?

Are you certain I can't sit down?

Certain!

I can't walk in this dress!

If your grace was a woman,
I could understand this weakness!

But in a dragoon...! Unbelievable!

Oh, damn it! Damn it!

Here let me note,
with all due deference to your grace,

that such language of the barrack-room
is not fitting to your garb.

But this wheel is in excellent condition!

It will go for hundreds more miles!
- Yes, I know.

But keep it to yourself. Here.

Innkeeper,
where is Mademoiselle de Beaumont?

She's gone up to her room.

I'll spread you some straw in the stable.

No, no need.
Where is her room?

Upstairs. Come, here.

Oh, those French!

The wheel is repaired!

But that is no reason to come
barging in.

No problem between us men.

And anyway, aren't you the younger?

Come on, pull off my boots.

What?

You aren't going to spend the night here?
- I'm not sleeping in another barn.

Being separated is not safe.
I've seen suspicious-looking people.

I wouldn't rest being away from you.

It's impossible!

In a bed like this?!

Look how good it is!

I hope you're not a loud snorer?

Listen, Bernard!

Good night!

I'm here... I'm here to see
if you need anything?

Yes, I need another room.
- Sorry, we don't have any.

They're all full. Some cavalrymen
arrived, some black men, and I...

They must be keeping watch. Behind
the door they'll be armed to the teeth.

Let them sleep peacefully. Killing them
will cause too much disturbance.

Good night.
- Good night.

We've reached the river crossing.

Can you get across?

No! You need to go back to the road
to St. Petersburg!

Bernard!

Well done, lily of the valley!

What are we going to do now?

All we can do is get to the bridge
and cross it before they do.

Let's go!

That was strange.

Previouly it hadn't worried me,
killing people.

Oh, come on. Those weren't people.

They were enemies. You understand,

handsome dragoon!

Don't you know, this is what
the Russians do?

It's the custom of these savages.

You'll have to get used to it, my boy!

Come on, sit down.

For once, you did the right thing

and you picked a most opportune moment.

The gentleman has fire in his belly.

I've never seen anything like it
in his squadron.

Come on! Forward!

Но! Но!

Stop!
- Whoa!

Advance.

Try to find where they're staying,
without being noticed.

Nobody will see me.
- Then join me at the Prussian Embassy.

May we pass?
- Advance.

What do you teach?
- A little of everything, Your Majesty.

Latin, French, the culinary arts.

Singing. But... we lack schools.

Not enough schools?
Do you have students?

Oh, they'll appear, Elizabeth Petrovna.
They'll appear.

They'll come like the wind from
our mountains.

Do you prefer rich students, or poor?

Poor. They're brighter.

You may well be right. But nobody,
except me, is to say this.

You might find yourself mistaken
for a revolutionary.

Be assured, father,

you haven't come here for nothing.

Your city is a pleasant one,
and has a place close to my heart.

Ivanov!

Why hasn't construction on this university
started yet?

But Majesty...
- Majesty, Majesty!

Call me Elizabeth Petrovna!

Elizabeth Petrovna,
we have not collected the loans yet...

Why do I need a Finance Minister,
if he never has any money?

I'll find some, Elizabeth Petrovna.

Go in peace, sir.

Next summer I will come to open
your university.

Marusya! Marusya!

Where is Grisha?
- I think he's still asleep.

What time is it now?
- Almost three, but if you want...

No, no, let him have this last sleep.
It's all he dreams of.

Very well. Gentlemen, have you anything
to tell me?

The Chief of police...
- Ah, yes!

We must decide the fate of a number
of conspirators?

892 conspirators!

I have ordered the construction of scaffolds,
Your Majesty.

You know they used to call me
Elizabeth the Merciful?

And on my coronation day

I swore to our patron saint St. Nicholas

that during my reign there will not
be a single head cut off!

And so it will be.

They will hang in the open air.

It will be almost like a natural death.

No.

I respect those who resist me.

Deport them to Siberia.
- And their leader?

Elizabeth Petrovna,
what will you do with him?

He needs to be made an example of!
Let me quarter him!

No! This punishment is unworthy
of such a speaker!

Cut out his tongue.
That will suffice.

Your Majesty is very kind. Too kind!!

Too!

The Prussian Ambassador is here,
Elizabeth Petrovna.

Oh, here you are, at last!

I was starting to notice
your long absence.

It's been a long two days
since you were here.

Your Majesty, I have brought with me
the latest draft treaty

between our two great countries.

And is this treaty truly advantageous
to our Holy Russia?

If you allow me, Elizabeth Petrovna,

it is most advantageous for all your
needs: coal, iron, munitions...

Everything that dirties the hands.
Show me.

Dare I remind you this is the 28th draft!

All your demands have been included.

My king hopes that Your Gracious Majesty
will sign...

Whenever I think of the king of Prussia,

I see...

Whenever I think of the King of Prussia,

I see him again naked in that
terrible bathroom in Potsdam,

when I barged in.

He was dumbfounded,

and covered his face with his hands.

That was all he could cover up.

You understand, it is impossible
to become the ally of such a person.

I know him too well.

Take it, Ivanov. I'll have a look at it
this evening, or tomorrow, or somewhen...

Leanna! Leanna Lopukhin!

Oh, I almost forgot about you, Leanna.

Concerns of state often mean we forget

about those dear to us.

Come here.

How beautiful you are! Will you come
with me? - Yes, Your Majesty.

No, don't call me Majesty.
Call me Elizabeth Petrovna.

I am your friend.

Tell me, Leanna, are you still...

how can I put it... a girl?

Yes, Elizabeth Petrovna.

Yes! And at your age aren't you tired
of still being a virgin?

But I'm only 20 years old.

And have not yet found a husband?

I have been thinking about you
a great deal recently

and I've chosen a husband for you.

A husband who, I'm sure,
you'll find very fitting.

He has already proved himself.

Is he from your guard?
- From my bodyguard. You guessed it.

I hope... is he tall?

He's no dwarf.

Is he handsome?

Every man is handsome... in his own way.

Ah... what colour are his eyes?

I really don't know. I never look
into the eyes of men.

All one sees there are lies

or nothing at all.
But enough childishness.

And here he is.

You mean Grisha?
- Yes, Grisha.

He is yours. I give him to you!

But I don't want him!

Don't want him? Why?

I want to marry a man I'm attracted to,

who I love!
- Love! Love again!

This is all I keep hearing!
It comes from those French novels!

As if love brings you anything in life!

Leave love to the men!
You will marry Grisha!

No! I don't want to!

You're crazy.

Marry him, or be sent to Siberia!

Come on, choose. Hurry up!

Siberia, Your Majesty.

Between Grisha and Siberia
you choose Siberia?

Very well, there you will go!
Meet a filthy and lousy man.

He'll speak to you of love.

I hope you have fun in Siberia.

Fool, what a choice to make!
Take her away!

And so I never have to see you again,
make sure you stay there!

For the rest of your life! In Siberia!

When you think about Grisha,
you'll regret this!

Yes, you'll regret it, I promise you!
In Siberia!

And now let's deal with you, Grisha!

Get up! Move it!
Get out of that bed!

Hurry up! Get out!
You disgust me!

You're a pig, Grisha!

All you think about is eating and sleeping!

Even that woman didn't want you!

I love only you!
- You rake, you parasite!

Vodka and caviar,
that's all that you need!

I don't want,
I don't want to leave you!

My little darling, queen, I love you!
You're my whole life!

Clear out and take your love with you!

When I think of the time I've wasted
with you! Get out!

She chose Siberia instead of you!

Away, away! Get out! Get out!

Marusya! Marusya!

Marusya!

I don't feel well...
- What is it, Elizabeth Petrovna?

Air...

Air!

Help me.

Help me!

Fresh air!

I'll kill that Grisha!

So, he won't be coming back?
- No, he won't be coming back.

Good!

This room needs to be totally changed.
Throw everything out! Oh, Marusya.

Look at this bed!
So big and empty. How sad.

I'm going to be in a bad mood
for the next few days.

Who knows,
maybe it will amuse me?

St. Nicholas... wait.

St. Nicholas!

What do you think about that Prussian
Ambassador? Yes, an automaton.

And what about the French Ambassador?
Too sly?

You never tell me what you think
about the Englishman.

Advise me.
Advise me, St. Nicholas!

I'll give you a beautiful gold coat!

In St Petersburg, the French and Prussian
Embassies are neighbours

and the sentries meet on the pavement.

I don't believe my eyes!

At my age,

I should be able to distinguish
between a chevalier and a pretty girl.

You're too king, Your Excellency.

When I read His Majesty's letter,
I thought it was impossible!

But the king is always right!

Gentlemen, your presence here
is most opportune.

For many months, the queen
has refused to receive me.

Moreover, Ivanov and these Prussians

do not permit a single Frenchman
to get close to her.

But a woman...

a woman who comes carrying your baggage,

satin and lace from Paris...

thie woman may succeed where
we have failed.

The queen may be a ruler,
but she is still a woman.

The king thought so.
- It's true, yes.

The king thinks of everything, gentlemen.

And we are just his humble servants.

The court courier brought this for you.

Thank you, Excellency.

Oh, heck!
- It's all right, Ambassador.

This makes my head spin!

Don't you ever get confused?

Well, I always knew the truth,
Your Excellency.

I traveled with him.
His arrogant manners...

always betray him!

Come on, we must go!

Well, gentlemen,
are you satisfied with yourselves?

Have you covered yourselves with glory?

You shouldn't have attacked them
during the journey.

This was a mistake.

We just didn't succeed.
Otherwise, it wouldn't be a problem.

You are paid to succeed, dear cousin!

Him too.

He will even receive 50,000 rubles
if the treaty be signed.

And the queen has not yet signed.

I have already explained to the Ambassador,

that much as I love Prussia,
I love life more.

And the current mood of Elizabeth Petrovna...
is so very changeable.

Why not try more direct solutions?

I don't understand, Your Excellency?

Come on! A hunting accident,

a jolly poison, anything effective...
decisive.

It couldn't be more simple.

You couldn't dispose of two mere dragoons,

and you want to... no!

Allow me to suggest something...

less brutal.

Maybe, I have an idea.

How much will it cost?

Just enough to pay a gambling debt.

A debt of honour?
- Yes, it is.

Some 100,000 rubles.

Kopeks!
- You'll get it.

Gentlemen!

Ambassador...

I must pay within 48 hours.

You don't mean to say that you
aren't trusted?

Here are your 100,000 rubles of honour.

Listen to me.

The Empress is suffering from loneliness.

From nostalgia.

Surely she has enough available cures
for love's sorrows?

Yes, but so far she has not found
what she needs.

You must keep close watch
on this chavalier and his letter,

and I'll search for...
- Yes, yes, we see.

...the successor to Grisha.

Have you heard about the Cossacks?

Can you accommodate me?

Guests were here, but they've left.

Good, come back tomorrow.

A letter from my father.

Bernard!
- Yes?

Bernard! Uncle Antoine is dead!
- God rest his soul!

You don't understand what this means
to me!

What's that?
- Now I can...

become myself again!

And who are you now?
- I'm...

I...

He's left me his entire estate.

A good way to ensure
that you are not too upset.

He was a 100 years old!

Where are you going?
- To smoke my pipe.

And so you can take a bath.

And if you want to try it on with the maid,
nobody will disturb you.

Madame, here is your bath.

What is your name?
- Natasha.

Natasha!

Natasha, now I can tell him!

I can tell him!
- Yes, tell him what?

That I'm a girl, silly!
- Doesn't he know?

It's so sad.
He's never looked at me.

Poor dear!

He could look at you in there.

This would be ideal!
Go fetch the captain, hurry!

Please!

What?
- The lady

is calling for you. At once.

Me?

Who's there?

Me.
- Come in.

You wanted me, cock?

Bernard!
- Yes?

I wanted to tell you that...

What?

Well, what... what I am...

What?

Wow! I hadn't noticed how fat you are,
my good man!

You're going to struggle
to get back into your uniform!

Daft dragoon!

Shooting plates is too easy!

Sometimes I ask myself,

how many chances I should give a man
before killing him?

Not many, Your Majesty.

I wouldn't want to be that man.

But, if you'll allow me...

I can offer you a target worthy
of your greatness.

Europe? The world?

Something more specific,

more Russian and more pleasant.

Your Majesty, allow me to introduce
you to Count Orlov,

Ataman of the Don Cossacks.

He is ready to prove his loyalty.

Ever since he first saw the queen
in the cathedral

it has been his wish to die by her hand.

Beauty does not deserve to die.

Approach.

Is it true that you are ready to die
for me?

True, Elizabeth Petrovna.

I took confession this morning,

and the patriarch gave me his blessing.

And if I asked you to live for me?

Gladly, Elizabeth Petrovna!

With you I am more a woman than a queen.

If you have something to ask of me,

ask! Whatever your wish,
I'll fulfill it .

If Your Majesty permits,

Cossacks will proudly show you
their strength and bravado!

My father, Peter the Great,
was very fond of the Cossacks.

I inherited his affection,
along with his Empire.

Demonstrate to me that you are still
worthy of this favour.

My men are not boring you,
Elizabeth Petrovna?

Not for a minute, Serge!

Starting tomorrow, your Cossacks,
the best of them,

will attend the military academy
in St Petersburg.

There they will become disciplined officers.

Strong and courageous... like you.

You know, Orlov,

I'm almost afraid of you.

You have nothing to be afraid of,
Elizabeth Petrovna.

In my chest beats a devoted heart.

Look at my Cossack.

He's as agile as a chamois.

I'm replacing the palace guard.

I want the Cossacks!

Marusya, look at those creatures!

They are so excited!

It's my Cossacks who've brought them
to this state.

I don't think so, little mother.
There is another reason.

What's going on?
Where did they get those ridiculous outfits?

The whole town's talking about it.

They are crazy about this couturier
who has just arrived from Paris.

From Paris?
And I know nothing about this?!

This is too much!

She has taken a large room
at the "Golden Cockerel" Hotel

and there has received more people
than are in your palace.

Come on!

Madames!

From now on, you will appear in front
of me properly dressed.

These dresses are only fitting
for the home

and your husband's eyes.

I forbid you

to appear in front of me at court

displaying yourselves like prostitutes!

This is, of course, unless you prefer
a public flogging!

Hello!

Come in, madame.

Show me your treasures.
- With pleasure.

These are the latest models from Paris.

Oh, I've never seen such magnificence!

I'm happy to hear it.

For 3 days I've had no visitors.

Russian women are not capable
of appreciating such elegance.

They had previously! My dresses
were in great demand!

Then suddenly, interest dried up.

Don't concern yourself with those fools.

I am a simple dressmaker.

I dressed Madame Pompadour.

Pompadour, pfft!

But madame...

Are they all for sale? How much?

1000 rubles for a dress.
Your choice.

You're right.

Let the rich pay for the poor.

All right. Prepare an account.

Tomorrow someone will come to pay
and collect the purchase.

For which?
You haven't chosen!

I've chosen.

Everything!

Goodbye, my child.

Long live the queen!

Well, did you give her the letter?
- No.

No?
- I didn't know who she was.

I didn't recognise her!

When you tell them this in Paris,
dishonour awaits!

Very clever! - It may not be clever,
but that's how it is!

Now, leave me alone!
Leave me alone!

Leave me alone!
- The Chevalier's nerves!

Just like a woman's nerves!

You've never had such beautiful dresses,
Elizabeth Petrovna!

This dress is from Paris, Marusya.
A genuine miracle!

It's like this, in Paris
18 year old girls wear nothing.

At 30 they dress up... to be stripped.

And at 40 they dress up
because they look better than naked.

You've been to Paris,
Elizabeth Petrovna?

Oh yes. In my dreams, Marusya.

Enter!

Is that you, my handsome Cossack?

No, Elizabeth, it is only I.

Your Majesty, this is most serious!

Oh no, no! How do you like my dress?
It's from Paris!

Magnificent!

But the one who sold it to you
is a spy of the king of France.

Spy?

Is that what you say?
This couturier is a spy?

Yes. It is a man,
disguised as a woman.

No!

But how... she is so slim, so elegant.

A man, disguised as a woman?!

This is unheard of, Marusya! Something
only the French could come up with!

I've always said, by the way, that
the French cannot be trusted!

Even completely naked.

A man disguised as a woman?
I wonder how they can be confused?

Ivanov, arrest him.
Immediately.

Yes, Your Majesty.

Your turn, Charles.

Come on.

Yes. My turn. Hand them over.

I'm so sly you're winning all my money.

This is just a game. To think,
the queen was there!

You know, if it had been me,
I'd have tried hitting on her.

I'd have secured a rendez-vous,
maybe more.

But you, even when its necessary,
to kiss a woman,.. Oh!

Indeed! Hold on, Don Juan!

Go, seduce her.
Go to her.

Make her sign this treaty with France.

Perfect! That's exactly what
I'm going to do.

Bernard! Give me that letter!
Give it to me!

Arrest the woman!

Bernard!

Look after what you took from me,
and inform the French Embassy!

Trust me!

Sit down!

So, what happened?
- We got rid of them.

Your Majesty!

Let me go!

Will you let me go or not?!

It's no use shouting, young lady,
nobody's coming to rescue you.

You will be released only
when I find out.

Good, Your Majesty.

I'm glad that I can talk to you.

The king of France sent me
to give you a letter.

A letter from Louis?

To me?

But I'm thinking,
what if my dear cousin

secretly desires to dispose of me.

They say you're a spy,
and very dangerous.

Me?! Wait, Your Majesty,
you will understand everything.

The letter will explain it all to you.

Oh Lord, I don't have it!

Naturally!

Mr. Dragoon!

Dragoon? Why?

Yes, yes.

I know that you are a man
disguised as a woman.

A phantasm concocted by the king of France!

Your Majesty is mistaken.

I am a woman.

It would be a shame!
- But it's true.

My name is Genevieve de Beaumont.

Let's see. Undress her!

Let me go! Let go!

Very well, good! I'm a man!

Let him go!

Come, chevalier.

Well, chevalier, tell me,
why are you dressed this way?

In Paris, they say that
you will not see a Frenchman.

What nonsense!
Frenchmen, like your Ambassador, - yes.

But not young men full of life!

You will bring me this letter tonight.

Tonight?
- Yes. Are you scared of me?

No!

At midnight.

We will read this letter together.
- Very well, Your Majesty.

Don't forget, midnight -
it is the time for confessions.

The time of the most gentle secrets.

Your Majesty, I have no secrets.

Very well!

I only hope that you can storm
the enemy fortress.

And conquer it.

It should be easy with
such hot lips, dear dragoon.

Yes, Your Majesty, that is...
already I don't know what I'm saying.

Orlov!

Allow him to move freely.

Follow him,
and do not loose sight of him

if you want to remain
head of my personal security.

I'm afraid, my poor friend, that
we are powerless in this situation.

But, Ambassador, we cannot leave
the chevalier in the hands of the Cossacks!

But we are in Russia,
and I know the Empress.

She holds a quick trial for everything!

You aren't saying...
- Alas!

Bernard!
- Ah, it's you!

Well, that's resolved.
- The letter? Where's the letter?

I just came from the "Golden Cockerel",
they told me you were here.

Hello, Ambassador.
I'll explain it all to you.

I need the letter, I can give it
to the queen tonight.

Well? Do you have it?

No, I hid it.
I thought they might find it on me.

Well, go find it!
- Wait! I'll check the coast is clear!

Listen, Bernard.

She'll be waiting for me. At midnight!

And as a man!
- At midnight?

Strange hour for an audience!

You know...

I think the queen is in love with me.

And you?

What should a dragoon do
in these circumstances?

A dragoon will sacrifice his honour
for his homeland?

And you?

Poor wretch.

What will happen to you?

What can you do?

You... you know?

Well, yes.

I knew from the start that
you're a woman.

From the start?
- Well, let's say, halfway through.

And I fell in love
with the damned dragoon!

Bernard!

But...

But then why have you been behaving
like this all the way?

You have to ask me this?
Because you were mocking me!

Chevalier d'Eon! I wonder, why?

Oh, Bernard!
- Yes?

Bernard, don't be angry with me.

It is all because of inheritance.

But Genevieve loves you.

And Charles... Charles will do
whatever you want.

Then kiss me.

My Genevieve!

And what will you do at midnight?

I won't go.

That is impossible.

I have an idea.

A dragoon never shirks.

Wear your uniform
and meet with the enemy.

And I, being also a dragoon,
I will assist.

But promise that you'll intervene...
- Only in the case of danger! I promise...

You can go now. Oh!

Well... well, well...

I hadn't realised...

It's love, Ambassador!

Do you think this is usual?
- The chevalier will explain it all.

Goodbye... damned dragoon!

I'm interested in what you have
to tell me, sir!

I'll tell you the truth. Well, I...

It's useless to resist!
Where is the letter?

What letter?
- Answer me, where is the letter?

I don't know.
- A pity.

Now we'll help you recover your memory.

Go get a drink.
Continue when he comes to his senses.

A handsome guy.

Start a fire and take off his boots.

What is your name?
- Charles.

If it pleases Your Majesty.

Charles...

for me, it is too formal a name.

Charles? No. I shall call you...

Dushka.

Dushka... Oh!

Oh, Dushka, how pale you are.

Your Majesty!
- No, no.

Call me Elizabeth.
- Very well.

Your Majesty,
I must in all honesty tell you...

That you love me? So?

No need, I know.
Everybody loves me.

Your Majesty, the letter!

No, no, the letter is for later!

Your Majesty, you should know...
- Then, no!

Don't say anything.

We are here with you,

together...

alone.

This is all that matters. Oh Dushka,

what's wrong with you, Dushka?
Are you unwell?

Why are you looking at me like that?

You...

you can't understand what
this is like for me.

Yes I can, all of it.

No, no, that's impossible.

At first you are torn,

between physical attraction
and fear of the queen.

But you'll see,
everything will be fine.

Dushka, how young you are!

But I will not disappoint your youth.

I've never seen a man like you.

This is what worries me, Your Majesty.

Oh, what a night.

Ah, night... how wonderful it is!

Dushka!

Do you like the night?

Yes, certainly...

And what if this night lasts
half a year?

Would you be happy?

Perhaps...
perhaps it would frighten me.

Frighten?

Don't be afraid, I will do everything
to soothe you, innocent boy.

A whole half year?
- Well, yes, even all my life.

If you please me.

Very well, Your Majesty.

As you wish.

Handsome dragoon!

Now we are practically invisible.

Don't be afraid of the dark.

Darkness is a friend of the shy.

If you want,
we can have light again...

later, when you respect me less.

It's agreeable this way.

Dushka!

When I talk to you,
answer right away.

Answer, my love.

It would be a great sadness to me
to cut such a beautiful neck.

Why have we been arrested?
We are foreign citizens!

We will file an official protest!
Ambassador, take action!

I have acted, Baron Dexter!

And we are making progress.

My Cossacks haven't let us down.

This Orlov inspires confidence.
Good thing he's here.

Let the others in!

I am forced, with sadness, to state

there have been lies and deception

from some people,
who presented themselves

with a smile of friendship on their lips.

Let me remind Your Majesty

that I have been warning you about
the tricks of the French for a long time.

Yes, I know, Ivanov.
Conspiracies, intrigues...

Dear Ambassador!

I think the moment has come,
when our Russia

must choose between France and Prussia.

My cousin, the king of France,
disappointed me.

He thinks he's the wisest,
most handsome, the strongest,

the richest king in all Europe.

The richest!

What vanity for such a small kingdom!

Your Majesty, you are absolutely correct.

And on the other hand, the king of Prussia

he is more kindly,

more honest and sincere.

He doesn't claim to be the most important
king in the world.

In short, he is the sort of king
with whom one can quietly make a treaty.

Your Majesty, too kind!

Indeed. You're right.

Too kind!

Because in some cases it needs

100 lashes and a trip to Siberia!

As in this case, for example.

Listen to what he dares write about me,

my cousin, the king of Prussia.

"Dear Mr. Voltaire!"

My cousin Elizabeth Petrovna,
arrogant whore...

this woman is happy only
in bed with good company.

I don't believe it! It's a forgery!

No. No, dear Ambassador.

I know very well his elegant handwriting.

But wait, that's not all!
"The one who is able to

manage her, without her knowing,

using her weaknesses in love,

is sure to achieve their desired goal!"

And here he is undoubtedly right,
my dear cousin!

I admit it.

But on this occasion

it was the king of France
who was the more skillful.

He was the more...

more adroit,

more, as the French would say,
more "Parisian".

Which proves that he understands
more than anyone

the subtleties of the female character.

This is why

I have decided to sign immediately
a treaty,

which will have

political and military significance,

with France.

But, Your Majesty!
Think about what you're doing!

I have thought a great deal, dear baron.

All night long!

I thought about you too, dear Ivanov!

And about you as well, Dexter.

The air of St. Petersburg
no longer suits you.

Do you know Siberia?
- Me?

Personally... no.

I think that there you will taste
an infinite and wonderful tranquility.

But this is unjust!

In Russia, I alone decide what is
just and unjust!

If I could, I would forgive you.

But when the baron is so stupid,

as to allow someone to take him
by the hand,

he deserves a hundredfold
to have that hand cut off.

And his tongue as well.

Your Majesty, I still have so much
to say!

Very well.

In Siberia you can tell your stories
to the storks and to the birches.

Orlov! Come on.

You betray us too, Orlov!

I serve only my beloved sovereign.

How can one conduct politics
in these conditions?

And as for you, Ambassador,

I advise that you head back
to your country tonight,

and report to your king
the results of your mission.

And once in Prussia, stay there!

And inform your king,

that if wants to say something to me,

that he should write personally.

It is not advisable that some rumours
circulate outside of the family.

Well, and now to you, dear French.

Mademoiselle de Beaumont?

Your Majesty, you were great!

You too, mademoiselle.

But, in playing with fire,
there was the risk of getting burnt!

Your courage deserves a reward!

I want to hand you now this military order...

which rightfully belongs to you,
Captain Bernard.

For ardor, for talent, for sensuality,

for the skill with which you defended
the honour of your country all night.

Yes, you are a most valuable soldier!

I appoint you chief of my personal security.

Thank you, Your Majesty.
I am deeply touched.

Oh, so that's it! You're deeply moved!

Coward! Traitor!

Strength, passion, sincerity!

I never want to see you again!

Genevieve!
- Oh no, no!

Why did she slap you?

Your Majesty,
I apologise for Mademoiselle de Beaumont!

She is in love.
- Oh, it cannot be! And you?

Alas, yes.

I love her too.

But what is this love,
that everyone talks about

until my ears hurt?
- It's difficult to explain.

It is a cruel and gentle hand,

that squeezes the heart until it fails.

Squeezes the heart...

Captain!

You must know that I wouldn't want
to take away from your king

a soldier like yourself.

And my conscience would be tortured,

if Mademoiselle de Beaumont
returned to Paris alone.

Go with her.

Thank you, Majesty!

I hate you! hate you!

Orlov!

Faithful Cossack, how do you feel?

Is your heart hurting?
- It hurts, Your Majesty.

It almost stops.

Incredible...

Leave me alone!

I don't want to see you!
- Close your eyes!

You're a traitor!

Just think on it!
And with the empress!

But that's no reason to make me walk!

And it's a long way to France!

I'll never forget this!
- Me neither...

that day I found out that
you're a woman.

Deceiver!

That was the day I found love!

Damned...