Kill Zombie! (2012) - full transcript

My name is Aziz. In a few days I will be done. Game Over!

Yesterday my life was still normal. I was a nobody in an office

and my boss was an asshole. A slave driver.

I don't like that, make it new.

Camp & Bell, Aziz.
Where are you staying, you miss everything, all the fun.

It's fantastic here, the bitches are
the Oberhammer. There is sharwama, kebab.

- Mo, shut up, okay?
- Of course!

But there was a ray of hope.

A shining star.

Tess!

Not in my league? Perhaps.



But sometimes you just have to wait long enough.

- Hey, tonight?
- Tonight.

This dream woman wants me.

And I want her.

Respect. Do you have a date?

Congratulations,
are you prepared?

A romantic beach hike, a table at Le Garage. And then...

What then, what?

Get them.

- Grab them.
- You bottle them.

You are a lucky guy. This is your chance, man. Tess!

You can disappear. I'm tired of it,
you always talk to friends on the phone.

They weren't my friends. This is my
brother and he's in the hospital.

- Camp & Bell, Aziz speaking.
- Where are you? This is where the party goes full.



You can go.

Hey, you there, come here.

- You can't do that.
- May I introduce your workplace.

Get out.

I'm starting to train today and in
two years I will show you my muscles.

Oh, What the Fuck? Brother. Finally you are here.

- How many more times should I call you?
- You should not call me, never.

I was fired because of you.

Fired?

Oh, what the fuck man. The job was not going to
make you rich anyway. Look around you this is living.

Thank you, bitch. Here please, your cocktail.

Spanish fly, just flown in.
I thought it all through carefully.

The two of us will open a business. You and me.

- You and me? Opening a business?
- Exactly.

Honestly, the only thing you still have, is your belly.

These are pure muscles. 100 percent halal.

See them ugly guys, they make a fortune.

You will need start-up capital.

- Don't forget, you...
- Trust me.

Trust me, trust me, everything is already
planned, have thought of everything.

Listen, it's totally simple. You just have
to play with several balls at the same time.

You shoot them higher and higher, always the
Keep an eye on the goal and then strike.

Go, run away. Make room,
I'm in a hurry. Let me through.

Sir, I have nothing to do with it.
I don't even know these people.

I would like to talk to my lawyer,
Mocrovic. Right now.

Moszkowicz.

Yes, that too. Call him.

Hey Po po, Hey Fucker. My buddy and
We also want to call our lawyers.

Look at this, the pooch can speak.

Be glad we can't get out of here.
My buddy will bite off your head

and shit in your throat.

- He wants to shit where?
- Shit in your throat.

- You guys are totally crazy.
- Hey, be careful who you mess with.

We'll get you. If my boss comes, he will take care of you.

The little puppy wags his Tail. Ruf, Ruf, Ruf.

- Are they losers.
- Stop it, okay?

- He started.
- Stop.

What's this? They can't put any
Local milk boys in prison here.

What's a pretty chick doing in such an ugly uniform?

Hmm, hopefully your wearing sexy Underwear, or not?

Good, the next one who opens his mouth, gets tasered by me.

Oh, yummy.

Should I also taser you? huh?

Taser me, taser me. Taser me, taser me,
please taser me.

- Nice, huh?
- What?

The city, the lights. You.

- I don't think so.
- The overtime can be pleasant.

I mean, we just put the whole Paperwork to the side.

I think we have have already tried.

As far as I am concerned, we can try again.

As far as I'm concerned, no.

Tess, come look ..... Tess! Fast!

It's a game they're just playing.

What's the point, they want us scared,
but only you are afraid.

The door is open.

I told you everything will be fine.

Hello?

- Where did he want to shit? - In your throat.
- In my throat? - Are you deaf?

Do you have couscous in your ear, or what?

- Try it.
- Do you have shit in your ear?

- Clean your shirt before you talk.
- Eh, why are you annoying my buddy?

- Keep my brother out of this.
- I will eat him alive.

- Try it if you have eggs.
- What then, what do you want to do then?

I'll give you a one-way ticket direct to Paramaribo.

Well, try it, you Pinscher.

Found them.

Brother.

15 messages.

20 messages and 21 missed calls.

I am the king of missed calls.
The most sought-after man here.

You have 15 new messages.

Select 1 to listen.

First new message.

Yesterday at 8:13.

Aziz, can you hear me? I'm stuck in the office.

I'm fine, but there are monsters everywhere. Please hurry.

Second new message. Received at 9:36.

It's me, Tess. Something crashed into the roof.
Everyone has gone crazy.

You have to come and help me. Please help me.

What the fuck grandma, are you fucking doing
there Granny? Are you blind or what?

Madam. Madam,

Are you okay?

Madam, Are you okay?

Here, now.

Where are you going? Come here!

This is a question I've asked before

What are we going to do now?

Either we continue or, we stop ... We keep going.

Good morning, after the totally
unexpected Events of the Space Station

exposed part of the Dutch
Population to a virus.

The police received countless calls from
People who witnessed the aggressive

Behavior of their fellow human beings
and were even attacked by them.

According to experts, these
people all came in contact

with a previously unknown green mucus.

This is located on satellite parts,
which were spread over Amsterdam.

Thank you, Walter. I thought the
Weather fairy came in,

but that doesn't sound like her.
Then move on. The Prime Minister

has declared a state of emergency
as a precautionary measure

and the army will Hermetically seal off the contaminated area.

If you are still within the contaminated areas,

try to leave as soon as possible!

And head to a Secure area. That is my advice to you.

Avoid any contact with parts of the space station

and with infected persons

and in case of direct confrontation

is the only way to eliminate them.

Yes, these pictures are not suitable for younger people.

I should have told you that earlier.

Please excuse this little slip-up, thank you very much.

Now the movie should come.

It's not coming. It is coming.

As you can see, yes. No one is safe from these zombies.

Because of zombies? Do you think so?
this nonsense with the spaceship?

Come on, they bullshit us all day.

The satellite fell into an office building.

Tess here. I am currently unavailable.

If you leave a message, I'll be happy to call you back.

- Who was that?
- A girl.

- Which girl?
- From the office.

- The office is a thing of the past, man.
- Where is the other? Where is the fat one?

I just need some start-up capital:

For a fryer, chairs, the locality.

Idiots!
Eh, relax, girl.

- What's your problem?
- What is my problem?

This is my problem.

We stay here until the army arrives.
Hey, no contradiction. Not a word!

Shh. I don't want to hear anything.

Be quiet. We stay here until the army comes. Understood?

Did you understand?

- Hit him with something.
- Yes, but with what?

Fixed, firm. Take the keyboard.

Here's a stapler.
That's how it will work.

- There's another one.
- I'll help you.

- Ha, that's for you!
- Catch.

Finish it off.

They're everywhere.

I repeat. Try to reach the security zone.

That is your only and last hope.

You have to hit the zombies
with something on the head.

Yes, of course, as in the movie the other day.
A silver bullet in the head helps.

- What do you say, you kill vampires.
- Werewolves.

Werewolves hate silver.

Such nonsense, what does this have to do with werewolves?

No.

Then don't stress me out with werewolves.

I'll call you if we're coming soon meet which ones, okay?

These are zombies, you shoot into the brain.

Go back!

Out. Everyone out. now.

What happened?

That looks like a Michael Jackson video.

Aziz, we have to get out of here.

Go, we have to get out of here. Come on, come on.

- Aziz, move on quickly.
- Fast, fast, in there.

- Hello?
- Aziz.

- Hey, Tess.
- Can you hear me?

- Where are you?
- I'm still stuck in the office.

Please, Help.

Hey, Hey, a stool?

Come on, man.

- Stay calm. I'm coming, okay?
- Okay, but come quickly.

- She lives.
- It's only a matter of time, isn't it?

- I'll get them.
- Who?

- Bad plan.
- I will, lazy ass. She is still alive.

You always make a drama.
You so they want to save so easily?

- Yes, together with you.
- Have you seen all the corpses?

- You can't do that.
- Yes, I can.

- Who?
- Some kind of chick.

- Tess, my friend.
- Yesterday you said ...

- Friends, I beg you, help me.
- So I, I don't know you.

I don't risk my life for any chick.

- She is not just any chick.
- She is his friend.

Mo, listen. I have to save them,
okay? We must save them.

Jeff, you're right. You don't know me and you don't know her.

But out there is a person, who absolutely needs our help.

It is not possible for us to only work or think for ourselves.
We must save them.

We can't always just run away from our problems.

Are we men or girls?

Come on, come with me.

Let's go. Say yes.

Yes. You see, beautiful

Okay, I'll go alone.

I'm leaving now.

going now.

Listen even if we all go together.

Against those out there we can't survive on our own.

We have to go to the safe zone.

Come, we going.

You don't believe, that I go to the security zone like this.

Yes, but why not?

Why not? Cameras and chicks.

We will be heroes, when we defeat the zombies.

I'm not going to be in swim shorts in front of all the TV cameras.

And there is no way we can Defeat zombies with a stool.

What are you planning to do with the money?

What do you mean?

What are you planning to do with the money?

I want to open my own business with my brother.

And what do you need?

- Just a small loan.
- Seed capital.

- Seed capital.
- You got it.

Not for starting capital, there isn't enough
in the cash register, you understand?

- For start-up capital you go to the bank.
- Which Bank?

This Bank.

Aziz, wait, stop. Hey, where are you going?
We had discussed everything.

- I will save them.
- Alone?

- Yes, if I have to. Alone.
- You won't survive on your own.

We'll see.

- What do you care?
- Look at me.

Raise your mask.

- Yah
- You are crazy.

Why crazy? This is the perfect car.

If you want to rob a bank, do it with style.

I'm not going to come along.

- Jesus.
- Why are you so stubborn?

Take a look around.

Either you help me, or you leave me alone.

Good, do as you like.

Hey guys, if you have a choice, take an Audi.

I prefer a beautiful BMW.

- An Audi, the black man's car.
- The car of a tough Moroccan.

- Who cares which car?
- What do you mean by that?

- Don't care. What's the difference?
- A parrot.

We take this one.

Hey. Hi guys. Are you coming along?

Then not.

- A Limousine.
- Cool, Man.

- Okay, come on, do your thing.
- My thing?

Yes, tear out the dashboard,

Connecting cables and short-circuit the car.

So, that's clear again. of course, Suriname steals the car again.

Did you know that the Surinamese people

are the least criminal group are
throughout the Netherlands?

- You didn't know that.
- Sneaky monster. Let me go!

Guys, can you help me?

Such stereotypes destroy our society. Yes?

Okay, sorry. Whatever.

- Just do your thing.
- What do you mean?

Can't you do that?

So you mean just because I'm Moroccan.
I should know how to do that?

This is Ben Saunders, man.

- What if the zombies come in?
- They don't come in, bulletproof.

- Different plan?
- And what was your old plan?

That wasn't my plan.

Under no circumstances should we hide in a garage.

That's okay, these are my buddies.

Everything okay?
Super.

Super.

- Excuse me.
- For what?

Well, for the blow.

- Sorry, for two blows.
- That's Okay.

Aziz, your future mother-in-law wants to talk to you.

Hey guys do you want to see something really cool?

Come, come along, go ahead.

Sergei and Steef did that yesterday dragged, right, Sergei?

He says that there is a kind of space moss is,
something very special, and...

And that it has now become liquid, here, on earth.

Do not touch.

Start!

This is madness.
That's pure power.

This is a beast, guys.
That's really incredible.

When everything goes down the drain, then
Sergei, Steef and I go to Tokyo.

Where is Steef anyway?

- Steef, where is he?
- Here.

- I would leave that in your place.
- You actually want to shoot?

If there were no laws, I would love to.

- Calm down, okay?
- No one will touch Steef.

Okay, Sergei, give Steef a few from the fried bulettes.

Look, that's not Steef anymore, okay?
Steef is no longer himself.

Ah, a stool?

Aziz, can you hear me?

- Yes, I hear you, Tess.
- Aziz, please help me.

More and more of these are coming in the building.

They are almost everywhere.

- I can't go any higher.
- Don't go up.

- I can't help it. It doesn't work.
- Don't go to the roof, Tess.

Hey, the money.

I'm doing this for us, brother.

AMB also makes you millionaires.

Okay, guys, we share 50-50 and no complaining.

We share 50-50?
There are four of us.

50 for you and 50 for me.

And of course I also want a quarter.

Okay, you know what? Two quarters for you, deal?

You are the best.

One, two.

Three.

and Four.

Five.

Six.

Seven.

Eight, nine, ten, eleven and twelve.

Nolan.

- Money!
- Show me the money.

Finally, man.

Here with the bags. Well, do it.

Think carefully about what you are doing,
you will still need us.

Stay calm, we'll get it later.
You want my bag, here it is.

I hope the zombies will eat you up.

Thanks for everything, friends. And now I disappear.

You have been bitten.

Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, I have been bitten.

Does everyone know that now? Come on!

I was bitten.

Sorry, I was bitten.

The arm has to go off.

My ex would never have done that.

Well, our relationship wasn't that great anyway.

I mean, what is 1.5 years?

Correct?

And you?

Hey, how long have you been together?

Well ...

we would have had our first date yesterday.

- Kim. Kim, let me explain.
- I don't talk to you anymore.

Sorry I should have told you.

You haven't even had a coffee with her.

- Wait.
- Tell the slut that you are coming alone.

Aziz, I'm sorry, but I'm stuck in the Bank.
I need your help.

- Where are you?
- Joris told us to get in the car.

And all of a sudden, we have robbed a bank.

- What? Why do you rob a bank?
- To raise our start-up capital.

And now we are locked up here and
there are zombies all around us.

Hang on. Hello?

I'm so scared. They are here everywhere in the...

Hang on.

- What are you doing? We are in mortal danger.
- I have Tess on the other line!

Well, congratulations. I Die slowly in
the bank because of your stupid...

Hold on.

There you are finally again. We need you here.
You just have to help me.

- I am fine.
- Are you sure?

Sure. Yes, it's just a scratch.

Is really nothing bad.

Okay, what do you feel like doing? Desire?

I mean food. Reply immediately,
don't think. Right now.

Risotto?

Wait. What's wrong with risotto?

Risotto can be with anything, man.
Risotto with vegetables, chicken, human flesh.

He wants risotto with human flesh.
I can see it in his eyes.

- Human flesh, can you get that?
- I say he's a zombie.

Chill, Mo. Let's take it easy.

He is not a zombie.

- But of course he's a zombie.
- We, we take him to a doctor.

Don't leave me here!
Okay buddy.

Forgive me, my friend.

What are you doing?

My ball.

Forgive me, my friend.

Again.

Do you need help?

That's too many.

This is not normal.

- Sorry Nolan.
- Three, two, one.

Wait.

- Come on.
- Three, two, one.

Damn, then he just becomes a zombie.

Okay, we'll make a fuse out of it,

hang him in the fuel tank and set him on fire.

You are crazy.

Works too.

RTL News

There is a new development in the zombie drama.

The completely destroyed space station on
the office building in Amsterdam

draws the infected persons like a magnet.

Moscow has its most prestigious
Explosives experts being flown in,

he is supposed to take care of the enigmatic
green Mucus and take care of the infected.

It is not on the teleprompter,
but I'll just say it anyway.

All shit. As long as Jan lives,
there is hope, as they say.

Let's just go on now, as nothing
but nothing would have happened.

One moment please.

These are colleagues. Now I
have spilled all the coffee.

Watch out.

There. This way. Where do we have to go?

Been here before. I know my way around,
we have to go there a long way.

You know your way around here?

Look around, everything looks the same.
I thought there was a side street here.

A side street? We have gone from
shit to now sitting here.

This is all your fault, just
because you didn't have a plan.

Oh, a plan. You call this
Climbing frame a plan?

Why do you have no idea, as usual?

- Oh, all of a sudden I have good ideas?
- What did you do in the bank?

Guys!

This is the end. We will all die.

Hey, aren't these the guys from the pool?

The Barachis?

The guys once had a kebab restaurant.

But then all the customers became zombies.

Hey boys, the security zone is along there.

I believe the safe zone is that way.

- Come.
- I mean it.

Sir, I need help.

My girlfriend is out there and I have to help her.

- You have to go through the tunnel.
- You don't understand. She is still alive!

The tunnel.

I don't want to go through this tunnel, understood?

Get a tank or a Helicopter, or anyone.
You're welcome!

- Okay.
- Okay, Thank you very much.

Let's just go into the tunnel go.
You send someone.

- Come on, here we are sure.
- Hey, hey, what are you doing?

If you do not follow this command
We will use weapons.

Get out of the vehicle and put
your hands behind your head.

Yeah buddy, we showed them.

That's exactly what I was missing all along.

- Say hello to my...
- Wait, you won't be now Quote Tony Montana.

- Yes, but the baby...
- None but. Nobody knows Scarface anymore!

- Just leave it at that.
- Guys!

We have to get away from here.

You go in,
I take care of them.

- Are you sure?
- Do I look like I'm safe?

Go in and save your girl. Let's go.

This is it, man.
This is it.

- This was a good day.
- Go to help your brother.

That's for Nolan.

Mo, hurry up.

Okay, come on, who wants to be the first? Motherfuckers

- Push it.
- Shit.

That's why I never use an elevator.

Come on, get up.

Go, push. Keep going.

- Going up?
- Yes, probably not with the elevator though.

- The stairs are on the other side.
- I hate climbing stairs.

We have to go through the offices.

Fuck .... lets do this.

This is very brave of you and romantic.

You're doing this for a girl,
that you almost don't know at all.

I put everyone in danger.

Maybe it's worth it.

Perhaps.

- And, do you have her number?
- Mo, go.

Climbing stairs sucks, man.

No, do not shoot, don't shoot, please.

- What are you doing here?
- I'm here because of the girl.

- Whom?
- Well Tess. You know.

- What a coincidence.
- I don't have time for jokes, okay?

I should help her, she called me a thousand times.

Tess called you?

Not just me. She called everyone,
that she had sex with.

I'm going to try now to get out of here again.

What the fuck? Why did we do all this shit?
just because of some slut?

Who called everyone, that she fucked?

Aziz, think. It's just kidding you.
We have to get out of here while we can.

I'm not going any further.

You have to go to the roof.

Aziz, Hi!

- Tess, I'm here.
- Super.

- But I have already been saved.
- What?

Yes, thank you. I have to hang up now. Goodbye.

- How do we get out of here?
- No problem, we take the elevator.

By elevator?
Isn't that dangerous?

Don't worry. I am with you.

Oh shit, I can't do any more.

You are still alive.

- Mo, where is Kim?
- I lost them.

- Simply lost?
- Don't worry about Kim.

If we were to die up here, then it's all your fault.

- My fault?
- Yes, your fault.

- Whose fault is this?
- Who ran after the slut?

Which one? Fuck it. We die anyway.

- Exactly, because of you.
- It's my fault?

- Yes of course.
- Okay, it's my fault.

- Yes, I say that all the time.
- Now it's enough for me.

You complain all your life.
You break everything I build.

You're a fucking loser. A nothing.
A cursed nobody.

Sorry, Mo.

I love you.

I love you too, my brother.

Maybe zombie bites will do nothing to him?

Yes, maybe the army has given him something
so that he does not become a zombie.

- You think so?
- I don't know, just what I'm thinking.

- He has been bitten six times.
- You see, he's not going to be a zombie.

- I am good. You see?
- You are right. He won't.

He will.

Oh, fuck! Grab the detonator.

- Look for Kim and blow the store in the air.
- You're crazy.

- Just do it.
- So that you can be a hero?

Do it, disappear.

I had already planned everything.
Both of us together. I had planned everything through.

- What?
- Our company of both of us. You and me.

- You are crazy.
- Exactly, I know that.

- Mo, I'm proud of you.
- I'm proud of you.

You really have risked everything for this Tess.
This is incredible.

- Fuck Tess.
- Fuck her.

But Kim, promise me, that this will be something.

1,000 percent. She will make you happy make.
I can feel it.

Make something of it. I beg you.

- But Mo, do you...
- Detonator, click, boom.

No, Mo.

You know brother, I hate running.

Go, you have to go now.

I'll give you ten minutes and then I
blow all the damn zombies up.

Go.

There is still a coke in the freezer.

Goodbye, Mr. Bakels.

A fucking bitch, Your friend.

Genuine?

At last.

- Where is Mo?
- On the roof.

Shit. In seven minutes he blows
everything up.

- Come, Jeff.
- Where the hell do you want to go?

in five minutes Mo is gonna blow it all up.

- Four minutes 50.
- Come on, quickly.

Come on, fucking zombies, come on.

You said five minutes.

Yeah, we did it.

Oh, yes baby! Fuck the zombies.

Hey, that's enough now. We have to go to the safe zone.

We certainly never have to do it again Pay taxes.

Fully horny. We did it. We are the last.

Vampire?

I hate vampires.

Could someone please kill this zombie?

The first to open his mouth, is being tasered.

I hate running.

Come on, their pack of undead motherfuckers.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, this, this and all.

- I hope the zombies eat you.
- Thank you friends. And now disappears.

As long as Jan lives, there is hope.

It's a bit too late, I think.
I think it was a bit late.

Apart from a few small incidents,
everything went like clockwork.

But that was completely wrong now.

Translated into English by Rudy S (Canada) 2022