If Only (2019) - full transcript
Chocolate pastry.
Croissant.
Stop it, Alma, focus.
Do what Mommy says: think only of God.
Raisin bread.
Nutella crepes...
Enough.
My name's Alma
and I haven't eaten since last night.
For the Orthodox Mass,
you fast before communion.
I'm hungry.
We were born in Rome,
in a Catholic family,
then we converted to the Orthodox
Church when Mommy met Pavel,
and we moved to Paris with him.
Next year, we're changing country again,
to Canada, where
there are grizzly bears.
Our mother's always in love
with something or with someone.
With Daddy she was an artist in Rome,
with Pavel she's a nun and we live here.
She and Daddy had a huge fight
and haven't spoken for over five years.
But I'm positive
they'll get married again.
Mom!
- May I?
- Yes, with God's help.
Come closer.
I want to tell you a secret.
God heard our prayers,
he's given us a wonderful gift.
- You'll soon have a little brother.
- It's good news, isn't it?
Stop, Jean!
Stop, Jean!
Aren't you happy?
It'll be wonderful.
Now I have to rest.
There are complications,
I have to stay in bed.
You're going skiing with your dad.
- With Dad?
- You leave for Italy tomorrow.
We haven't seen him for a year.
You said he'll never let us go to Canada.
- So you spoke with Dad?
- Of course.
- And how did it go?
- My darlings...
- How long are we staying?
- Two weeks.
- I'm not going.
- Of course you'll go, he's your father!
No arguments!
Dalida!
Mom and Dad spoke to each other.
- I think they'll get back together.
- Don't be silly.
What's wrong?
You can ask Dad to take you
to the Colosseum.
Come, my darlings.
May this light always be with you.
Thanks.
It's St. Seraphim, our patron saint.
May this light always be with you.
Thanks, Mom.
Come, sweetheart.
May this light always be with you.
- Give this to Dad.
- Can't you tell him?
Here's Jean's diet, his medication
and the address
of the Orthodox church in Rome.
Don't say a word about Canada,
otherwise he won't let us go.
- Okay?
- Wouldn't it be better this way?
One last thing:
not a word about the baby.
Sure, you don't want to break his heart.
Shall we go?
It's nice you worry about Dad.
We're late.
Have fun.
- Bye.
- Have fun, sweetheart.
Were you smoking?
The teddy bear is too cute!
No, it's not him.
Dad doesn't have a dog.
- It's not him.
- He doesn't have a dog.
Yes, it's him!
- Hi!
- Daddy!
Hello, darling.
Hi, Jean.
Hi, Seb.
Do I sign here?
Here.
- Since when do you have a dog?
- Too cute!
- No, he stinks.
- It's true, he stinks.
- What have you brought with you?
- This dog is too cute!
- He's just like Dalida!
- I've got no room.
- So cute...
- Aren't you hot?
Alma, come on!
We don't have much room.
Okay, close the door.
You're all in the back? Am I your driver?
- I'll come.
- Fasten your seatbelt.
- How was the trip?
- Good.
- Seb, let me feel your muscles!
- No, please stop.
Here are the passports and Mom's letter.
Yeah, the letter... I'll read it later.
All right.
I like this one.
I'll definitely put it in my film.
- Did you know I've written a new film?
- I'm sure it'll be a happy one.
You've been writing it for two years.
I have a new screenwriter,
she's very good.
Marcello Mastroianni
wants to do the film...
The producers are crazy about the script,
really happy with it... just as well.
Now we'll drop in at the production
office and then we'll go to Courmayeur.
Are we going in the train you sleep in?
We're walking!
Just kidding.
Okay then...
Wait here,
I'll get my check and be right back.
Seb, keep an eye on Tenco.
Shit, we'll be waiting hours.
My parents separated
when I was one year old.
I've never seen them together,
but I know they were a wonderful couple.
Then, of course, my dad is so handsome
he's always had lots of girlfriends.
The first one after Mommy was Viola,
they went for a trip to India.
Mommy says to replace
"after" with "during",
but I've never believed her.
Then there was Olivia with the red hair,
Amanda, who shot at the firing range,
and the last one, Jasmine.
"Dear Carlo,
here is an outline of the kids' needs...
Dear Carlo..."
What are you doing there? Let's go.
Let's move.
Did they actually say "sucks"?
Worse, those assholes said
I'm burned out.
- And the check?
- No check.
I have to rewrite the script, or no film.
Why do our grandparents
want to see us all of a sudden?
- I thought they were dead.
- If only...
Come on.
Don't leave anything in the car.
- Why are you unloading our suitcases?
- So we've got everything.
- Aren't we going to the mountains?
- Yes, we are.
Mom! Maybe we're going
to the mountains, we'll see.
What have you got in here?
What a surprise!
Darling!
- Look who I brought you.
- How lovely!
Say hi to your grandma.
How are you, my darlings?
Come on in.
- You'll be back soon, right?
- Yes.
- Jean's medication?
- I've got it.
- Let's go.
- See you in a little while.
I'll be right back!
- Thanks, Grandpa, we'll read it.
- You're welcome, Jean.
- Seb... I'm Jean.
- Well, I never see you.
Okay, but let's eat now,
before it gets cold.
We have the capability to make
the world's first bionic man.
Steve Austin will be a new man,
different from all others.
Stronger, faster...
It's me.
When I was in a coma
maybe they put a chip in me
to make me a cyborg.
What are you talking about?
Why not?
Maybe I am a lab rat.
- Could it be true?
- Impossible.
It’s science fiction.
A week? Are you out of your mind?
Speak to your son, will you?
They're waiting for you.
The little one asks
about you all the time.
Let me talk to him.
Enough with this film bullshit!
Grow up once for all!
Come now, or I'll say
you abandoned them.
Why did you do that?
Let's go to bed.
Why?
- Seriously?
- I'm waiting for Dad.
Dad isn't coming.
I don't believe you. He'd never do that.
He would.
I want Mommy.
I want to go home.
Alma, don't be such a baby.
Jean, not now.
You'll see, it will pass.
Guys!
Wake up!
Get the luggage,
see you at the front door.
- Where were you?
- Move!
- Who is she?
- I don't know.
I told you he didn't want
to leave us here.
Hi, guys.
- Are you Alba?
- Alma.
This is Benedetta, she works with me,
she's helping me write the script.
They were awake, let's go.
I'll drive, your father is no good at it.
Bye!
You wanna hear some great news?
We're not going to the mountains,
we're going to the seaside.
- We brought all the ski equipment.
- It's too cold in the mountains.
- Mom said we'd see the Colosseum.
- There it is, look.
Look.
- Aren't you taking Christmas off?
- F'only!
I was supposed to go away
with my boyfriend, but he had to work.
He had to work,
but they love each other very much.
Very much.
- Is it true?
- Yes.
- Are we nearly there?
- Yes, sweetheart, we're nearly there.
What are you doing?
Slow down.
Fuck you, asshole piece-a-trash!
Are you out of your mind?
- He wouldn't let us pass.
- Don't do that.
- If he gets out of the car...
- Scary...
Look how beautiful it is.
Are you happy?
Look how sunny it is!
Here.
Do you remember Bruce?
Your American friend who steals statues.
He doesn't steal, he's an antique dealer.
Your mother always exaggerates.
We came here when you were little.
Go.
It's paradise!
For him for sure.
We'll check out the rooms.
Yes.
Tenco?
Baby, come here!
My beautiful little piggy.
Here. You're hungry, huh?
- You're hungry...
- I'm hungry. Is there any food here?
No, but you can go buy something.
There's a deli nearby.
But take those things off your feet.
It's ridiculous, we're at the beach.
Alma, don't make me upset.
He can't afford to take us anywhere else.
- It's not true.
- Yes, it is.
- No, it's not.
- Yes, it is.
- You weren't even born yet.
- What's the point?
I mean, he brought us
where we used to go with Mum
when we were kids.
Alma, let's go!
They were so cool on their mopeds!
You hurt me.
Come on!
- You hurt me.
- You're exaggerating.
Thank God you're laughing, I want to cry.
- What are you doing?
- We're praying.
Jean needs his shot.
Do you want to do it?
You go for it, I don't know how to do it.
You wanted to leave us
with our grandparents.
- That's not true, come on...
- Yes, it is.
I heard the phone conversation.
A whole week.
If you touch your ear
it means it's true.
Why do you always lie to us?
I'm not lying to you.
I was happy to see you,
you saw that, too.
Only, you know what Mom's like,
she always wants to lay down the law.
It'd be good to do things
at the right time.
With you there's never a right time.
Hey, buddy!
Did you hear that too?
I thought I heard a little piggy, fuck!
Yeah, it is...
It's a little piggy.
I didn't know
there were piggies in Kentucky.
The new circuits boost your powers,
I'm afraid to check your limits.
Did you pray?
I'm talking to you.
- Big ones! Not like Benedetta.
- You've never seen them.
She was walking around
half naked today.
So don't believe me.
- Can you manage?
- Yes.
We got them pizza. Will they be happy?
- What do you think?
- Yes.
- Where should I put these?
- Here.
Did you get food for Tenco?
Are you eating pizza, are you crazy?
Do you want to die?
- Spit it out.
- You're scaring him.
He ate pizza!
Give him a shot immediately!
You know how it works?
I'll go get the letter.
I don't think you get it...
It's not like this.
Seb, can you speak Italian?
It's hard to speak Italian
every two years.
- Don't preach. I was working.
- Fine excuse.
- Sorry?
- Fine excuse!
Fine excuse, my ass!
It's your mother's fault
if I barely saw you in Paris.
Forget it.
I can eat sugar,
I just have to be careful.
Seb, take care of this,
I don't know how it works.
Give him...
- I have to work. You got any books?
- The Gospel.
The Gospel isn't a book, fuck...
Let's go for a drive, shall we?
- Beautiful.
- Where did you get these?
Well, I obviously bought them.
How can I fish when there's no fish?
Hold this for a moment.
- Here.
- It's gross!
Here he is. Come on, darling.
Let's go!
You suck...
"'I'd prefer not to tell you,
but soon I'll stink of garlic,'
said Lane.
Then on one of his trips
he met a couple of newlyweds.
'The most fantastic characters
I've ever found in a book.'"
Saint Mary Queen of Heaven,
Saint Seraphim,
Saint Theophan the Recluse...
I'll make a sacrifice
and drink this glass of pee.
In exchange for this gesture,
get Mom and Dad back together.
One sip works just as well.
Alma, stop it.
The days went by like that.
When Dad's work was going well,
he was happy and we were all together.
But when he couldn't work
he got into a really bad mood.
Artists have to express themselves.
Sometimes they don't even have kids,
so it went well for us.
But I know, I studied it at school:
between 27 and 37 years of age,
Van Gogh made over 900 paintings
and many drawings.
So it's as if he created
a new work every 36 hours.
Dad's 39, so he has a lot
to catch up on.
You think a man can't be a victim,
and that's the truth.
You make it personal,
you think the character doesn't work
because I have problems
with the male sex.
Yes, you do have problems
with the male sex!
Are you leaving?
- Hi, guys.
- Hi, Benny.
Write the film by yourself.
Dad, you need to buy insulin for Jean.
What should I buy? I don't know.
- Lispro...
- Wait, I'll write it down.
- Aspra... What did you say?
- NPH.
Write it down and leave it there.
I'm working, please, out.
- Come on, I'll take you into town.
- I have to work! Out!
- Let's go ski in town.
- F'onlay!
F'only!
- Don't touch it, you'll get scabies.
- What's that?
- Scabies.
- What's that?
Little spiders get on your hands
and lay eggs in your skin.
The eggs burst and
you scratch until you die.
This is really cool, though.
Everything's on sale.
- How much is it?
- 5,000 lire for the shirt.
- And these?
- The pants are 10,000 lire.
- Sold.
- That's 15,000 lire in total.
Not bad, huh?
30,000 lire.
30,000? But they're scratched...
Let's go.
- You stole them!
- I didn't!
I borrowed them permanently.
- How much did they want?
- 30,000 lire.
For knockoff Ray-Bans!
That's robbery.
What's a knockoff?
You don't know what knockoff means?
Knockoff means they're fake.
Here... a gift.
When did you start smoking?
You look pretty.
What are you doing?
Are you making yourself pretty?
I dressed up for New Year's Eve.
Why don't we have a sad party this year?
With lentils at least, come on.
As long as that we don't have fireworks,
because Tenco gets scared.
Isn't that right, piggy?
Can I read you something I wrote,
that I think's amazing?
Go.
"Tommaso goes down to the sea.
It's dark.
The sound of the waves
against the rocks.
Inside the house, the phone rings.
It might be her,
but Tommaso lets it ring."
Why does he let it ring?
He lets it ring because...
Because he's afraid to answer.
What's he got to be afraid of?
It's his ex.
Alma, let's go.
Take Tenco too, he needs
to do his business.
I don't want to, he's your dog.
Please.
Go, Alma.
Bye.
Let's go, Tenco.
So you didn't like it then.
It's a little... banal?
Banal.
Banal? It's not banal at all.
It actually keeps
the character ambiguous.
Ambiguous, how?
Ambiguous about the fact that...
Is he still afraid of his ex?
He's not afraid, he's just...
I thought it gave...
What? It's banal.
- It's not, there's ambiguity...
- What ambiguity?
- Banal...
- He needs to overcome his fears.
- It's you in there.
- No, you're getting things mixed up.
What's he doing?
Would you like some bracelets?
Morning.
One for 5,000, two for 6,000...
It's better to get two.
Sure, two is good for 6,000.
I'll take one.
- What color do you want?
- You pick.
- Thank you.
- And thank you.
- How many?
- Two.
Careful.
- Thanks.
- Thank you very much.
Goodbye! Thank you!
Thank you!
Have a nice day!
- A big sale.
-They took good ones.
Yeah, the best I've made.
Hi!
- What's your name?
- Alma.
- And you, with those bracelets?
- Jean.
- I want one of those bracelets.
- They're called Scooby-Doo.
- And you?
- I'm the older brother, I'm almost 15.
He turned 14 a month ago.
Then I'll call you KGIBB:
Keep Growing I'll Be Back.
- Do you want to go for a walk with us?
- No thanks.
Yes!
C'mon.
Go.
Wait for me!
- This is cool.
- Amazing.
See how it eat spiders?
- Do you like our hideout?
- Great.
Beer!
- Thanks.
- All the beer you want!
- Let me sit down.
- Let's open them.
- Want some?
- No...
Go for it, Seb!
Go, Seb!
Go, Seb!
It's not poison.
Did you like it?
Be careful!
You like riding around Sabaudia, huh?
There's nothing here.
"It's all so simple.
Yes, it was all so simple.
The evidence is such
I almost don't believe it.
That's what the body is for:
you touch me or you don't,
you hug me or push me away,
the rest is for madmen."
Beautiful.
Her love is like this.
It has to be like this,
it's... a necessary love.
It doesn't ask questions.
Yes. Visceral...
I would also say obsessive.
You're such a dickhead!
I'm serious, it has to be like this,
or the story collapses.
Sure!
- Where have you been?
- Sorry.
Just kidding.
- Dad!
- Darling! Come here.
Come, Tenco!
Next time he stays with you.
- You went for a walk.
- It was the best day of my life.
Really?
What happened? Tell me.
- We went...
- Some water?
I'll give you some water.
Where are you going?
It's a truly sad New Year's.
What are you making?
A cigarette.
Hello?
Mom!
Happy New Year!
You want to talk to Daddy?
- Hi, Mom!
- Dad's got a dog, Tenco!
I wanted to ask you, how's your belly?
Give it to me.
- And how's Mom?
- Good.
She sounded sad, without us.
But she's still with...
Pavel.
- What's he like?
- A total drag.
Hi.
Can you make room for me?
Oh, God...
You absolutely had to sit here?
- Move your feet.
- She's right, we were so comfortable.
- Roberto!
- Mom!
- The pasta's on the table.
- Bucatini?
Fusilli!
Approved.
- Come on, Jean, let's go.
- Where are you going?
Let's get our coats and go.
She's always smoking drugs, you know?
She puts makeup on Alma,
buys her clothes.
She's a thief. Even though
she did it for you, it's not right.
Yes, but I don't think
she takes lots of drugs.
All they do is lie to us.
She's not Dad's collaborator,
it's obvious.
Yeah, only Dad writes.
I saw her naked with him.
- Naked?
- Yes!
Seb, Jean!
Where are you?
Hi! The Frenchies!
Gianni, KGIBB...
- How are you?
- All good, you?
Good.
Neat, whose is it?
My parents. I drive it
when they're not here.
Benedetta?
Are you there?
Alma, give me a break. Go!
Daddy...
What is it?
Seb and Jean are
on an adventure without me.
Benedetta says I have to leave her alone.
Poor baby! Do you want
to play with Tenco?
No, I'm sick of Tenco.
- What do you want to do?
- I want Mommy.
You know what we'll do?
We'll go get ice cream in town,
whaddaya say?
What's wrong?
Why are you so sad today?
You wanna tell me?
Yesterday I couldn't even talk to Mommy.
And I'm worried, she's pregnant.
When we left Paris, she was sick.
I'm sad because
we're going to live in Canada.
What? In Canada?
I see.
Please don't call her! Daddy!
Will you listen to her? Don't call her.
I just want Mom to explain this to me.
Go in there, please.
Charlotte? Yes.
What's all this about Canada?
When were you going to tell me
you're moving to the other side
of the world with our kids?
I see.
No...
You disgust me, you know?
You disgust me.
First, you brainwashed the kids
with this bullshit conversion.
And anyway, you can't do this,
is that clear? There are laws, courts.
Really? It's been years since
you've known anything about my life.
And you tell the kids all this bullshit.
Are you really having a kid with Pushkin?
After Alma you said never again...
Things change?
They change for other people, too.
You can't just do what the fuck you like!
They're my kids too!
We know,
but that's got nothing to do with it.
India, lies, the same old story...
This is different!
Do you hear me?
They're our kids, they're not just yours!
Do you get that?
Hello?
Charlotte?
What's wrong?
I'm looking for something.
- Don't be hysterical.
- Look who's talking.
Did you hear what she said?
She's going to Canada!
This time I'll call the lawyers.
The kids are staying in Rome
to have a normal life,
they're not going to live
with that psycho.
I don't believe it.
- Anyway, I think there's still...
- Still what?
Still what? C'mon.
C'mon... what's wrong?
Let's go, boy.
Now the two us of us will have some fun.
Our Father, please,
don't let Daddy hate Mommy
because of this, make him forgive her.
Saint Seraphim, I'll be good.
Next time I'll drink all the pee.
No more lying to my brothers,
I'll stop stealing Benedetta's make up.
If Dad got so mad,
it meant he still loved her.
And if the woman you love
moves far away,
you suffer for sure.
- What are you doing here? Get in!
- Dad's really mad.
Why are you driving, Seb?
Will you stop, please?
- You're still completely in love.
- Are you crazy?
I've never seen you like this.
I've got three kids,
don't you understand?
Yes, I do.
It's your manner, you're ambiguous...
I'm ambiguous? You have a boyfriend.
No, I said it straight off,
you have two shitty parallel stories.
- But she's my wife!
- Ex-wife!
Okay, ex-wife. Will you stop now?
Enough!
Come on, please.
- My feet are wet.
- I'll carry you.
- Let's go home. Enough.
- I'm cold.
Are they crazy? Stop!
Come back!
Where the fuck are you going?
Come back now!
What a gross punishment.
I'll tell you what's worse.
Dad is with Mom...
Sorry, with Benedetta.
We already knew that.
Dad is still in love with Mom,
he calls her his wife.
- Shut your mouth.
- Even Benedetta said it!
I don't care.
Let go of it.
What is this?
Where did you get it?
Did you steal it?
I didn't steal it.
- You're lying.
- I didn't steal it.
- You stole it!
- I didn't steal it, okay?
I'm tired of your bullshit!
And who wanted to drive the car? You!
- Calm down.
- Leave me alone.
Will you cut it out?
Are you out of your minds? Stop it!
I've had enough of you!
What the fuck are you doing?
Don't you dare!
Idiot! And don't laugh!
Don't you dare!
You can't all just do what you like!
Who's the father?
It's me, is that clear?
"Dear Carlo,
here is an outline of the kids' needs.
Pay special attention
to Jean's situation,
which, as you know, is not simple."
What, he's on vacation?
After the Epiphany is too late.
Tell the lawyer to call me back.
Who is it? Who's he talking to?
Nobody.
C'mon, write 58.
Uncle Bruce!
Weren't you supposed to be in Turkey?
He's grown, huh?
Hi, I'm Carlo.
Beans...
You've lived in Italy for 15 years
and you still haven't learned Italian...
Pasquale, whip up some rice croquettes!
What did you bring?
Hands!
Free kick!
Go over there.
Here, free kick.
It was further down.
- Corner!
- No, it was already out.
Corner kick!
It's ours.
Enough!
What?
- Get up, I didn't do anything to you.
- That's a penalty!
What penalty?
- It's a yard from the gate.
- I didn't do anything.
Look at the field,
this is the penalty area.
- You knocked me down.
- Calm down.
Cut it out! Get grip!
- No, Seb's grounded.
- Enough already.
Go on like this and you'll get
an extra day, you hear me?
- You're leaving?
- I'm done playing.
You invent the rules
and then you break them.
I break the rules?
He's obsessed with rules,
it drives me nuts.
His mother's filled his head with it.
She's brainwashed them...
The bomb, the bomb...
It was a foul...
Come.
Let's go upstairs.
Beautiful, right?
That's not funny at all, Bruce.
I'm telling you.
See? I only found out yesterday.
They've known for six months.
That seem right to you?
Don't eat ragù at nine in the morning!
That's disgusting!
She's with an immunologist.
He only talks about diseases,
no wonder she's depressed.
If you want to go to Canada,
at minus 20, then you're depressed.
We're hungry!
Good morning!
Pasquale, you wanna eat something?
Sorry.
Pasquale, what will we cook
for Eva's party?
What party?
- Shut up!
- What's all this about?
Who's he talking about?
You want one?
I want a green one.
- I want this one.
- 5,000 for one, 6,000 for two.
Two's better.
Thank you!
- Here.
- Thank you!
- I'm Bruce.
- Silvia. Nice to meet you.
Calm down, you little pest!
Goodness me! Sorry!
Have you and Mommy
ganged up on me?
Tell me the truth,
do you want to destroy me?
- Why do you want to destroy me?
- Stop it!
Holy Mother! Let me taste it.
Good. Don't stain your dress.
When I was his age,
I watched "Last Tango in Paris".
What Maria Schneider was for me,
the Virgin Mary is for my son.
- It's ridiculous.
- Poor little thing...
I'm the poor little thing, not him.
And then there are the Masses.
For example, tomorrow I have to take
them to the Orthodox church...
Tenco...
Has anyone seen Tenco?
Where have you gotten to,
my little piggy?
- We've lost our dog, can you help us?
- Sure.
Is Benedetta here?
She's inside.
Come on, Benedetta's coming.
Tenco has never done it.
What a bastard!
I'm reading what your dad rewrote.
It's very good, you know?
We have to go to Rome,
there's Mass today.
I don't think your father
wants to go to Mass.
Shall I take you?
Yes, please.
I'll get dressed and we'll go.
Let's go.
Monocular vision!
Enhanced eyes.
Iron legs.
Bionic leap!
Don't joke, Jean.
Stop it, idiot.
Wake up!
Dad! Bruce!
Dad, Jean is on the ground. He's hurt!
- What?
- Jean's in a coma!
Wake up!
Call an ambulance!
Here's the Colosseum.
The real one, not the fake one in EUR.
Via San Teodoro...
I think I got it wrong.
Look.
Ladies and gentlemen,
I give you: the Colosseum!
Maybe it's further ahead.
Take a look.
"Orthodox Church of Saint Theodore"...
This is it.
At least we tried.
- What are you doing?
- I'm adding something I wrote.
I'm going to the production office,
I'll be right back.
Does he know?
- We'll be really late.
- Stop whining!
- How about a riddle?
- Go on.
I have one eye,
but I can't see. Who am I?
- I know.
- Go on.
I'm Polyphemus
after Ulysses blinded me.
No, but good answer.
I'm a cyclone.
I'm a cyclone...
Yes, because I have one eye,
but I can't see.
It was lovely watching you pray.
- No need to make fun of me.
- I'm not making fun of you.
It's wonderful to know how to believe.
Yes, but I'm not exactly a saint.
Ah, no?
No? I was convinced you were.
But I'm not.
So, do you want it?
- Yes.
- I'll never give it to you.
- Come on, let's drink a toast.
- Wait.
To this escape.
What?
- What's wrong?
- Fuck!
- Fuck! The gas.
- What do you mean, gas?
Didn't you see the warning light?
Yeah, but it keeps going
for ages after that.
We need to find someone
with a jerrycan.
There's nobody here.
We'll find someone.
Stop!
Thank you.
Yoo-hoo!
Where the hell have you been, Seb?
It's midnight! Jean's in the hospital!
What happened?
- Everything okay?
- Okay.
My love...
My darlings...
Did you forget the NPH? Like last time?
We're waiting for the results.
Sorry, but I need to understand.
When did you realize
you hadn't given him his medication?
It was the first time
I'd seen them together in eight years.
Why had they waited so long?
They were perfect, beautiful, happy.
They were even better
than in the ID photo.
Benedetta.
Right, you weren't introduced.
Where are the doctors?
Please, go home.
We'll call you if there's any news.
Thank you.
I already feel guilty enough,
without you adding to it.
I don't give a fuck if you feel guilty.
You don't give a fuck about anything.
You're moving to the other side of
the world and you don't even call me.
- All right...
- That's not how this ends.
We need to think about Jean now.
They travel with icons in their luggage,
I mean, really!
Excuse me a moment.
Seb can't even look a woman
in the eye.
Look how far you've gone,
you've scrambled their brains.
It's your fault.
I don't know if he told you,
but I'm pregnant.
You want one?
Yeah, okay.
Bye, Marco, thanks!
Bye.
- I hope to see you soon.
- Me too.
Here. It's for your car.
It's beautiful. Thank you.
- Bye.
- Bye, Marco.
Bruce told me that,
in order not to reveal their feelings,
men use the technique of indifference.
Don't be sad, Marco.
I'll be nine in three months.
Another nine years and I'll be 18
and I'll come back to you.
We'll open a garage in San Felice.
What have they done to you?
Where did you find him?
Where did you find him?
Was it you?
Dad, it's my fault, I killed him,
I didn't do it on purpose.
- What?
- It's my fault.
What the fuck are you saying?
I heard you at the party,
laughing and talking about me.
- Saying how boring I am.
- Is that true?
Mom, let me speak.
I took the car, you didn't even notice.
Then Tenco crossed the street...
I couldn't stop in time.
I'm sorry, it was an accident.
You killed him! You killed him!
It's your fault
if Jean is at the hospital,
you were supposed to look after us.
They were supposed
to look after us... Us! Not me.
I didn't do it on purpose.
We'll see each other, okay?
Come here.
Is that a promise?
Say it.
I promise.
- Say it.
- I promise.
Why are you going? There's no need to.
It's best if you all stay here
without me.
I'll see you tomorrow.
How did Mom react
when they said it wasn't Dad's fault?
She couldn't believe
he was insulted for nothing.
And what did he say?
That it was his responsibility.
Good answer and her?
Alma, I'm tired
of your dumbass questions.
I just want to know if she's softened.
Yes, she has softened.
Leave me alone!
What made you faint
if it wasn't glycemia?
- Please, stop sulking.
- I hate you.
I'll tell you a secret
if you forgive me for Tenco.
- A big one.
- Go on.
We kissed, Benedetta and I.
Don't talk nonsense.
Has anyone seen my glasses?
- Alma, are you ready?
- Wait, I'll be right there.
Alma, please!
- Are you okay?
- How's the baby?
He's fine.
If I talk to him, can he hear me?
Yes, sure.
His ear is the size of this fingernail.
Perhaps even tinier.
You coming?
Yes.
Hi.
Really?
Excellent, I'm pleased.
I can be there in a couple of hours.
Okay?
Okay.
Thanks, Fabio, I'm very happy.
Bye. See you in a bit.
The producer of the film just called.
They read the new version
of the script and...
And...?
They liked it a lot.
They said they're doing the film.
I have to go.
Yes. Do you have to leave right now?
We're leaving too.
So what shall we do, shall we go?
- It was Jean.
- Wait, I'll peel it for you.
Very cute...
Take it.
- And what else have you done?
- We went fishing.
- I caught a huge fish.
- Really?
Huge...
- It wasn't huge?
- No... but it wasn't bad.
And you didn't catch anything?
I helped him out.
Whenever I thought
what a family looked like,
I pictured something like this,
more or less.
Maybe with more sun
or without a dead dog.
Maybe with a little extra time and
without Jean ending up in the hospital.
Maybe with Marco and Benedetta
or with a Game Boy all to myself.
But more or less
the family I wanted was like that.
IF ONLY
subtitles edited by Elvira de Majo
Ombre elettriche ®
Croissant.
Stop it, Alma, focus.
Do what Mommy says: think only of God.
Raisin bread.
Nutella crepes...
Enough.
My name's Alma
and I haven't eaten since last night.
For the Orthodox Mass,
you fast before communion.
I'm hungry.
We were born in Rome,
in a Catholic family,
then we converted to the Orthodox
Church when Mommy met Pavel,
and we moved to Paris with him.
Next year, we're changing country again,
to Canada, where
there are grizzly bears.
Our mother's always in love
with something or with someone.
With Daddy she was an artist in Rome,
with Pavel she's a nun and we live here.
She and Daddy had a huge fight
and haven't spoken for over five years.
But I'm positive
they'll get married again.
Mom!
- May I?
- Yes, with God's help.
Come closer.
I want to tell you a secret.
God heard our prayers,
he's given us a wonderful gift.
- You'll soon have a little brother.
- It's good news, isn't it?
Stop, Jean!
Stop, Jean!
Aren't you happy?
It'll be wonderful.
Now I have to rest.
There are complications,
I have to stay in bed.
You're going skiing with your dad.
- With Dad?
- You leave for Italy tomorrow.
We haven't seen him for a year.
You said he'll never let us go to Canada.
- So you spoke with Dad?
- Of course.
- And how did it go?
- My darlings...
- How long are we staying?
- Two weeks.
- I'm not going.
- Of course you'll go, he's your father!
No arguments!
Dalida!
Mom and Dad spoke to each other.
- I think they'll get back together.
- Don't be silly.
What's wrong?
You can ask Dad to take you
to the Colosseum.
Come, my darlings.
May this light always be with you.
Thanks.
It's St. Seraphim, our patron saint.
May this light always be with you.
Thanks, Mom.
Come, sweetheart.
May this light always be with you.
- Give this to Dad.
- Can't you tell him?
Here's Jean's diet, his medication
and the address
of the Orthodox church in Rome.
Don't say a word about Canada,
otherwise he won't let us go.
- Okay?
- Wouldn't it be better this way?
One last thing:
not a word about the baby.
Sure, you don't want to break his heart.
Shall we go?
It's nice you worry about Dad.
We're late.
Have fun.
- Bye.
- Have fun, sweetheart.
Were you smoking?
The teddy bear is too cute!
No, it's not him.
Dad doesn't have a dog.
- It's not him.
- He doesn't have a dog.
Yes, it's him!
- Hi!
- Daddy!
Hello, darling.
Hi, Jean.
Hi, Seb.
Do I sign here?
Here.
- Since when do you have a dog?
- Too cute!
- No, he stinks.
- It's true, he stinks.
- What have you brought with you?
- This dog is too cute!
- He's just like Dalida!
- I've got no room.
- So cute...
- Aren't you hot?
Alma, come on!
We don't have much room.
Okay, close the door.
You're all in the back? Am I your driver?
- I'll come.
- Fasten your seatbelt.
- How was the trip?
- Good.
- Seb, let me feel your muscles!
- No, please stop.
Here are the passports and Mom's letter.
Yeah, the letter... I'll read it later.
All right.
I like this one.
I'll definitely put it in my film.
- Did you know I've written a new film?
- I'm sure it'll be a happy one.
You've been writing it for two years.
I have a new screenwriter,
she's very good.
Marcello Mastroianni
wants to do the film...
The producers are crazy about the script,
really happy with it... just as well.
Now we'll drop in at the production
office and then we'll go to Courmayeur.
Are we going in the train you sleep in?
We're walking!
Just kidding.
Okay then...
Wait here,
I'll get my check and be right back.
Seb, keep an eye on Tenco.
Shit, we'll be waiting hours.
My parents separated
when I was one year old.
I've never seen them together,
but I know they were a wonderful couple.
Then, of course, my dad is so handsome
he's always had lots of girlfriends.
The first one after Mommy was Viola,
they went for a trip to India.
Mommy says to replace
"after" with "during",
but I've never believed her.
Then there was Olivia with the red hair,
Amanda, who shot at the firing range,
and the last one, Jasmine.
"Dear Carlo,
here is an outline of the kids' needs...
Dear Carlo..."
What are you doing there? Let's go.
Let's move.
Did they actually say "sucks"?
Worse, those assholes said
I'm burned out.
- And the check?
- No check.
I have to rewrite the script, or no film.
Why do our grandparents
want to see us all of a sudden?
- I thought they were dead.
- If only...
Come on.
Don't leave anything in the car.
- Why are you unloading our suitcases?
- So we've got everything.
- Aren't we going to the mountains?
- Yes, we are.
Mom! Maybe we're going
to the mountains, we'll see.
What have you got in here?
What a surprise!
Darling!
- Look who I brought you.
- How lovely!
Say hi to your grandma.
How are you, my darlings?
Come on in.
- You'll be back soon, right?
- Yes.
- Jean's medication?
- I've got it.
- Let's go.
- See you in a little while.
I'll be right back!
- Thanks, Grandpa, we'll read it.
- You're welcome, Jean.
- Seb... I'm Jean.
- Well, I never see you.
Okay, but let's eat now,
before it gets cold.
We have the capability to make
the world's first bionic man.
Steve Austin will be a new man,
different from all others.
Stronger, faster...
It's me.
When I was in a coma
maybe they put a chip in me
to make me a cyborg.
What are you talking about?
Why not?
Maybe I am a lab rat.
- Could it be true?
- Impossible.
It’s science fiction.
A week? Are you out of your mind?
Speak to your son, will you?
They're waiting for you.
The little one asks
about you all the time.
Let me talk to him.
Enough with this film bullshit!
Grow up once for all!
Come now, or I'll say
you abandoned them.
Why did you do that?
Let's go to bed.
Why?
- Seriously?
- I'm waiting for Dad.
Dad isn't coming.
I don't believe you. He'd never do that.
He would.
I want Mommy.
I want to go home.
Alma, don't be such a baby.
Jean, not now.
You'll see, it will pass.
Guys!
Wake up!
Get the luggage,
see you at the front door.
- Where were you?
- Move!
- Who is she?
- I don't know.
I told you he didn't want
to leave us here.
Hi, guys.
- Are you Alba?
- Alma.
This is Benedetta, she works with me,
she's helping me write the script.
They were awake, let's go.
I'll drive, your father is no good at it.
Bye!
You wanna hear some great news?
We're not going to the mountains,
we're going to the seaside.
- We brought all the ski equipment.
- It's too cold in the mountains.
- Mom said we'd see the Colosseum.
- There it is, look.
Look.
- Aren't you taking Christmas off?
- F'only!
I was supposed to go away
with my boyfriend, but he had to work.
He had to work,
but they love each other very much.
Very much.
- Is it true?
- Yes.
- Are we nearly there?
- Yes, sweetheart, we're nearly there.
What are you doing?
Slow down.
Fuck you, asshole piece-a-trash!
Are you out of your mind?
- He wouldn't let us pass.
- Don't do that.
- If he gets out of the car...
- Scary...
Look how beautiful it is.
Are you happy?
Look how sunny it is!
Here.
Do you remember Bruce?
Your American friend who steals statues.
He doesn't steal, he's an antique dealer.
Your mother always exaggerates.
We came here when you were little.
Go.
It's paradise!
For him for sure.
We'll check out the rooms.
Yes.
Tenco?
Baby, come here!
My beautiful little piggy.
Here. You're hungry, huh?
- You're hungry...
- I'm hungry. Is there any food here?
No, but you can go buy something.
There's a deli nearby.
But take those things off your feet.
It's ridiculous, we're at the beach.
Alma, don't make me upset.
He can't afford to take us anywhere else.
- It's not true.
- Yes, it is.
- No, it's not.
- Yes, it is.
- You weren't even born yet.
- What's the point?
I mean, he brought us
where we used to go with Mum
when we were kids.
Alma, let's go!
They were so cool on their mopeds!
You hurt me.
Come on!
- You hurt me.
- You're exaggerating.
Thank God you're laughing, I want to cry.
- What are you doing?
- We're praying.
Jean needs his shot.
Do you want to do it?
You go for it, I don't know how to do it.
You wanted to leave us
with our grandparents.
- That's not true, come on...
- Yes, it is.
I heard the phone conversation.
A whole week.
If you touch your ear
it means it's true.
Why do you always lie to us?
I'm not lying to you.
I was happy to see you,
you saw that, too.
Only, you know what Mom's like,
she always wants to lay down the law.
It'd be good to do things
at the right time.
With you there's never a right time.
Hey, buddy!
Did you hear that too?
I thought I heard a little piggy, fuck!
Yeah, it is...
It's a little piggy.
I didn't know
there were piggies in Kentucky.
The new circuits boost your powers,
I'm afraid to check your limits.
Did you pray?
I'm talking to you.
- Big ones! Not like Benedetta.
- You've never seen them.
She was walking around
half naked today.
So don't believe me.
- Can you manage?
- Yes.
We got them pizza. Will they be happy?
- What do you think?
- Yes.
- Where should I put these?
- Here.
Did you get food for Tenco?
Are you eating pizza, are you crazy?
Do you want to die?
- Spit it out.
- You're scaring him.
He ate pizza!
Give him a shot immediately!
You know how it works?
I'll go get the letter.
I don't think you get it...
It's not like this.
Seb, can you speak Italian?
It's hard to speak Italian
every two years.
- Don't preach. I was working.
- Fine excuse.
- Sorry?
- Fine excuse!
Fine excuse, my ass!
It's your mother's fault
if I barely saw you in Paris.
Forget it.
I can eat sugar,
I just have to be careful.
Seb, take care of this,
I don't know how it works.
Give him...
- I have to work. You got any books?
- The Gospel.
The Gospel isn't a book, fuck...
Let's go for a drive, shall we?
- Beautiful.
- Where did you get these?
Well, I obviously bought them.
How can I fish when there's no fish?
Hold this for a moment.
- Here.
- It's gross!
Here he is. Come on, darling.
Let's go!
You suck...
"'I'd prefer not to tell you,
but soon I'll stink of garlic,'
said Lane.
Then on one of his trips
he met a couple of newlyweds.
'The most fantastic characters
I've ever found in a book.'"
Saint Mary Queen of Heaven,
Saint Seraphim,
Saint Theophan the Recluse...
I'll make a sacrifice
and drink this glass of pee.
In exchange for this gesture,
get Mom and Dad back together.
One sip works just as well.
Alma, stop it.
The days went by like that.
When Dad's work was going well,
he was happy and we were all together.
But when he couldn't work
he got into a really bad mood.
Artists have to express themselves.
Sometimes they don't even have kids,
so it went well for us.
But I know, I studied it at school:
between 27 and 37 years of age,
Van Gogh made over 900 paintings
and many drawings.
So it's as if he created
a new work every 36 hours.
Dad's 39, so he has a lot
to catch up on.
You think a man can't be a victim,
and that's the truth.
You make it personal,
you think the character doesn't work
because I have problems
with the male sex.
Yes, you do have problems
with the male sex!
Are you leaving?
- Hi, guys.
- Hi, Benny.
Write the film by yourself.
Dad, you need to buy insulin for Jean.
What should I buy? I don't know.
- Lispro...
- Wait, I'll write it down.
- Aspra... What did you say?
- NPH.
Write it down and leave it there.
I'm working, please, out.
- Come on, I'll take you into town.
- I have to work! Out!
- Let's go ski in town.
- F'onlay!
F'only!
- Don't touch it, you'll get scabies.
- What's that?
- Scabies.
- What's that?
Little spiders get on your hands
and lay eggs in your skin.
The eggs burst and
you scratch until you die.
This is really cool, though.
Everything's on sale.
- How much is it?
- 5,000 lire for the shirt.
- And these?
- The pants are 10,000 lire.
- Sold.
- That's 15,000 lire in total.
Not bad, huh?
30,000 lire.
30,000? But they're scratched...
Let's go.
- You stole them!
- I didn't!
I borrowed them permanently.
- How much did they want?
- 30,000 lire.
For knockoff Ray-Bans!
That's robbery.
What's a knockoff?
You don't know what knockoff means?
Knockoff means they're fake.
Here... a gift.
When did you start smoking?
You look pretty.
What are you doing?
Are you making yourself pretty?
I dressed up for New Year's Eve.
Why don't we have a sad party this year?
With lentils at least, come on.
As long as that we don't have fireworks,
because Tenco gets scared.
Isn't that right, piggy?
Can I read you something I wrote,
that I think's amazing?
Go.
"Tommaso goes down to the sea.
It's dark.
The sound of the waves
against the rocks.
Inside the house, the phone rings.
It might be her,
but Tommaso lets it ring."
Why does he let it ring?
He lets it ring because...
Because he's afraid to answer.
What's he got to be afraid of?
It's his ex.
Alma, let's go.
Take Tenco too, he needs
to do his business.
I don't want to, he's your dog.
Please.
Go, Alma.
Bye.
Let's go, Tenco.
So you didn't like it then.
It's a little... banal?
Banal.
Banal? It's not banal at all.
It actually keeps
the character ambiguous.
Ambiguous, how?
Ambiguous about the fact that...
Is he still afraid of his ex?
He's not afraid, he's just...
I thought it gave...
What? It's banal.
- It's not, there's ambiguity...
- What ambiguity?
- Banal...
- He needs to overcome his fears.
- It's you in there.
- No, you're getting things mixed up.
What's he doing?
Would you like some bracelets?
Morning.
One for 5,000, two for 6,000...
It's better to get two.
Sure, two is good for 6,000.
I'll take one.
- What color do you want?
- You pick.
- Thank you.
- And thank you.
- How many?
- Two.
Careful.
- Thanks.
- Thank you very much.
Goodbye! Thank you!
Thank you!
Have a nice day!
- A big sale.
-They took good ones.
Yeah, the best I've made.
Hi!
- What's your name?
- Alma.
- And you, with those bracelets?
- Jean.
- I want one of those bracelets.
- They're called Scooby-Doo.
- And you?
- I'm the older brother, I'm almost 15.
He turned 14 a month ago.
Then I'll call you KGIBB:
Keep Growing I'll Be Back.
- Do you want to go for a walk with us?
- No thanks.
Yes!
C'mon.
Go.
Wait for me!
- This is cool.
- Amazing.
See how it eat spiders?
- Do you like our hideout?
- Great.
Beer!
- Thanks.
- All the beer you want!
- Let me sit down.
- Let's open them.
- Want some?
- No...
Go for it, Seb!
Go, Seb!
Go, Seb!
It's not poison.
Did you like it?
Be careful!
You like riding around Sabaudia, huh?
There's nothing here.
"It's all so simple.
Yes, it was all so simple.
The evidence is such
I almost don't believe it.
That's what the body is for:
you touch me or you don't,
you hug me or push me away,
the rest is for madmen."
Beautiful.
Her love is like this.
It has to be like this,
it's... a necessary love.
It doesn't ask questions.
Yes. Visceral...
I would also say obsessive.
You're such a dickhead!
I'm serious, it has to be like this,
or the story collapses.
Sure!
- Where have you been?
- Sorry.
Just kidding.
- Dad!
- Darling! Come here.
Come, Tenco!
Next time he stays with you.
- You went for a walk.
- It was the best day of my life.
Really?
What happened? Tell me.
- We went...
- Some water?
I'll give you some water.
Where are you going?
It's a truly sad New Year's.
What are you making?
A cigarette.
Hello?
Mom!
Happy New Year!
You want to talk to Daddy?
- Hi, Mom!
- Dad's got a dog, Tenco!
I wanted to ask you, how's your belly?
Give it to me.
- And how's Mom?
- Good.
She sounded sad, without us.
But she's still with...
Pavel.
- What's he like?
- A total drag.
Hi.
Can you make room for me?
Oh, God...
You absolutely had to sit here?
- Move your feet.
- She's right, we were so comfortable.
- Roberto!
- Mom!
- The pasta's on the table.
- Bucatini?
Fusilli!
Approved.
- Come on, Jean, let's go.
- Where are you going?
Let's get our coats and go.
She's always smoking drugs, you know?
She puts makeup on Alma,
buys her clothes.
She's a thief. Even though
she did it for you, it's not right.
Yes, but I don't think
she takes lots of drugs.
All they do is lie to us.
She's not Dad's collaborator,
it's obvious.
Yeah, only Dad writes.
I saw her naked with him.
- Naked?
- Yes!
Seb, Jean!
Where are you?
Hi! The Frenchies!
Gianni, KGIBB...
- How are you?
- All good, you?
Good.
Neat, whose is it?
My parents. I drive it
when they're not here.
Benedetta?
Are you there?
Alma, give me a break. Go!
Daddy...
What is it?
Seb and Jean are
on an adventure without me.
Benedetta says I have to leave her alone.
Poor baby! Do you want
to play with Tenco?
No, I'm sick of Tenco.
- What do you want to do?
- I want Mommy.
You know what we'll do?
We'll go get ice cream in town,
whaddaya say?
What's wrong?
Why are you so sad today?
You wanna tell me?
Yesterday I couldn't even talk to Mommy.
And I'm worried, she's pregnant.
When we left Paris, she was sick.
I'm sad because
we're going to live in Canada.
What? In Canada?
I see.
Please don't call her! Daddy!
Will you listen to her? Don't call her.
I just want Mom to explain this to me.
Go in there, please.
Charlotte? Yes.
What's all this about Canada?
When were you going to tell me
you're moving to the other side
of the world with our kids?
I see.
No...
You disgust me, you know?
You disgust me.
First, you brainwashed the kids
with this bullshit conversion.
And anyway, you can't do this,
is that clear? There are laws, courts.
Really? It's been years since
you've known anything about my life.
And you tell the kids all this bullshit.
Are you really having a kid with Pushkin?
After Alma you said never again...
Things change?
They change for other people, too.
You can't just do what the fuck you like!
They're my kids too!
We know,
but that's got nothing to do with it.
India, lies, the same old story...
This is different!
Do you hear me?
They're our kids, they're not just yours!
Do you get that?
Hello?
Charlotte?
What's wrong?
I'm looking for something.
- Don't be hysterical.
- Look who's talking.
Did you hear what she said?
She's going to Canada!
This time I'll call the lawyers.
The kids are staying in Rome
to have a normal life,
they're not going to live
with that psycho.
I don't believe it.
- Anyway, I think there's still...
- Still what?
Still what? C'mon.
C'mon... what's wrong?
Let's go, boy.
Now the two us of us will have some fun.
Our Father, please,
don't let Daddy hate Mommy
because of this, make him forgive her.
Saint Seraphim, I'll be good.
Next time I'll drink all the pee.
No more lying to my brothers,
I'll stop stealing Benedetta's make up.
If Dad got so mad,
it meant he still loved her.
And if the woman you love
moves far away,
you suffer for sure.
- What are you doing here? Get in!
- Dad's really mad.
Why are you driving, Seb?
Will you stop, please?
- You're still completely in love.
- Are you crazy?
I've never seen you like this.
I've got three kids,
don't you understand?
Yes, I do.
It's your manner, you're ambiguous...
I'm ambiguous? You have a boyfriend.
No, I said it straight off,
you have two shitty parallel stories.
- But she's my wife!
- Ex-wife!
Okay, ex-wife. Will you stop now?
Enough!
Come on, please.
- My feet are wet.
- I'll carry you.
- Let's go home. Enough.
- I'm cold.
Are they crazy? Stop!
Come back!
Where the fuck are you going?
Come back now!
What a gross punishment.
I'll tell you what's worse.
Dad is with Mom...
Sorry, with Benedetta.
We already knew that.
Dad is still in love with Mom,
he calls her his wife.
- Shut your mouth.
- Even Benedetta said it!
I don't care.
Let go of it.
What is this?
Where did you get it?
Did you steal it?
I didn't steal it.
- You're lying.
- I didn't steal it.
- You stole it!
- I didn't steal it, okay?
I'm tired of your bullshit!
And who wanted to drive the car? You!
- Calm down.
- Leave me alone.
Will you cut it out?
Are you out of your minds? Stop it!
I've had enough of you!
What the fuck are you doing?
Don't you dare!
Idiot! And don't laugh!
Don't you dare!
You can't all just do what you like!
Who's the father?
It's me, is that clear?
"Dear Carlo,
here is an outline of the kids' needs.
Pay special attention
to Jean's situation,
which, as you know, is not simple."
What, he's on vacation?
After the Epiphany is too late.
Tell the lawyer to call me back.
Who is it? Who's he talking to?
Nobody.
C'mon, write 58.
Uncle Bruce!
Weren't you supposed to be in Turkey?
He's grown, huh?
Hi, I'm Carlo.
Beans...
You've lived in Italy for 15 years
and you still haven't learned Italian...
Pasquale, whip up some rice croquettes!
What did you bring?
Hands!
Free kick!
Go over there.
Here, free kick.
It was further down.
- Corner!
- No, it was already out.
Corner kick!
It's ours.
Enough!
What?
- Get up, I didn't do anything to you.
- That's a penalty!
What penalty?
- It's a yard from the gate.
- I didn't do anything.
Look at the field,
this is the penalty area.
- You knocked me down.
- Calm down.
Cut it out! Get grip!
- No, Seb's grounded.
- Enough already.
Go on like this and you'll get
an extra day, you hear me?
- You're leaving?
- I'm done playing.
You invent the rules
and then you break them.
I break the rules?
He's obsessed with rules,
it drives me nuts.
His mother's filled his head with it.
She's brainwashed them...
The bomb, the bomb...
It was a foul...
Come.
Let's go upstairs.
Beautiful, right?
That's not funny at all, Bruce.
I'm telling you.
See? I only found out yesterday.
They've known for six months.
That seem right to you?
Don't eat ragù at nine in the morning!
That's disgusting!
She's with an immunologist.
He only talks about diseases,
no wonder she's depressed.
If you want to go to Canada,
at minus 20, then you're depressed.
We're hungry!
Good morning!
Pasquale, you wanna eat something?
Sorry.
Pasquale, what will we cook
for Eva's party?
What party?
- Shut up!
- What's all this about?
Who's he talking about?
You want one?
I want a green one.
- I want this one.
- 5,000 for one, 6,000 for two.
Two's better.
Thank you!
- Here.
- Thank you!
- I'm Bruce.
- Silvia. Nice to meet you.
Calm down, you little pest!
Goodness me! Sorry!
Have you and Mommy
ganged up on me?
Tell me the truth,
do you want to destroy me?
- Why do you want to destroy me?
- Stop it!
Holy Mother! Let me taste it.
Good. Don't stain your dress.
When I was his age,
I watched "Last Tango in Paris".
What Maria Schneider was for me,
the Virgin Mary is for my son.
- It's ridiculous.
- Poor little thing...
I'm the poor little thing, not him.
And then there are the Masses.
For example, tomorrow I have to take
them to the Orthodox church...
Tenco...
Has anyone seen Tenco?
Where have you gotten to,
my little piggy?
- We've lost our dog, can you help us?
- Sure.
Is Benedetta here?
She's inside.
Come on, Benedetta's coming.
Tenco has never done it.
What a bastard!
I'm reading what your dad rewrote.
It's very good, you know?
We have to go to Rome,
there's Mass today.
I don't think your father
wants to go to Mass.
Shall I take you?
Yes, please.
I'll get dressed and we'll go.
Let's go.
Monocular vision!
Enhanced eyes.
Iron legs.
Bionic leap!
Don't joke, Jean.
Stop it, idiot.
Wake up!
Dad! Bruce!
Dad, Jean is on the ground. He's hurt!
- What?
- Jean's in a coma!
Wake up!
Call an ambulance!
Here's the Colosseum.
The real one, not the fake one in EUR.
Via San Teodoro...
I think I got it wrong.
Look.
Ladies and gentlemen,
I give you: the Colosseum!
Maybe it's further ahead.
Take a look.
"Orthodox Church of Saint Theodore"...
This is it.
At least we tried.
- What are you doing?
- I'm adding something I wrote.
I'm going to the production office,
I'll be right back.
Does he know?
- We'll be really late.
- Stop whining!
- How about a riddle?
- Go on.
I have one eye,
but I can't see. Who am I?
- I know.
- Go on.
I'm Polyphemus
after Ulysses blinded me.
No, but good answer.
I'm a cyclone.
I'm a cyclone...
Yes, because I have one eye,
but I can't see.
It was lovely watching you pray.
- No need to make fun of me.
- I'm not making fun of you.
It's wonderful to know how to believe.
Yes, but I'm not exactly a saint.
Ah, no?
No? I was convinced you were.
But I'm not.
So, do you want it?
- Yes.
- I'll never give it to you.
- Come on, let's drink a toast.
- Wait.
To this escape.
What?
- What's wrong?
- Fuck!
- Fuck! The gas.
- What do you mean, gas?
Didn't you see the warning light?
Yeah, but it keeps going
for ages after that.
We need to find someone
with a jerrycan.
There's nobody here.
We'll find someone.
Stop!
Thank you.
Yoo-hoo!
Where the hell have you been, Seb?
It's midnight! Jean's in the hospital!
What happened?
- Everything okay?
- Okay.
My love...
My darlings...
Did you forget the NPH? Like last time?
We're waiting for the results.
Sorry, but I need to understand.
When did you realize
you hadn't given him his medication?
It was the first time
I'd seen them together in eight years.
Why had they waited so long?
They were perfect, beautiful, happy.
They were even better
than in the ID photo.
Benedetta.
Right, you weren't introduced.
Where are the doctors?
Please, go home.
We'll call you if there's any news.
Thank you.
I already feel guilty enough,
without you adding to it.
I don't give a fuck if you feel guilty.
You don't give a fuck about anything.
You're moving to the other side of
the world and you don't even call me.
- All right...
- That's not how this ends.
We need to think about Jean now.
They travel with icons in their luggage,
I mean, really!
Excuse me a moment.
Seb can't even look a woman
in the eye.
Look how far you've gone,
you've scrambled their brains.
It's your fault.
I don't know if he told you,
but I'm pregnant.
You want one?
Yeah, okay.
Bye, Marco, thanks!
Bye.
- I hope to see you soon.
- Me too.
Here. It's for your car.
It's beautiful. Thank you.
- Bye.
- Bye, Marco.
Bruce told me that,
in order not to reveal their feelings,
men use the technique of indifference.
Don't be sad, Marco.
I'll be nine in three months.
Another nine years and I'll be 18
and I'll come back to you.
We'll open a garage in San Felice.
What have they done to you?
Where did you find him?
Where did you find him?
Was it you?
Dad, it's my fault, I killed him,
I didn't do it on purpose.
- What?
- It's my fault.
What the fuck are you saying?
I heard you at the party,
laughing and talking about me.
- Saying how boring I am.
- Is that true?
Mom, let me speak.
I took the car, you didn't even notice.
Then Tenco crossed the street...
I couldn't stop in time.
I'm sorry, it was an accident.
You killed him! You killed him!
It's your fault
if Jean is at the hospital,
you were supposed to look after us.
They were supposed
to look after us... Us! Not me.
I didn't do it on purpose.
We'll see each other, okay?
Come here.
Is that a promise?
Say it.
I promise.
- Say it.
- I promise.
Why are you going? There's no need to.
It's best if you all stay here
without me.
I'll see you tomorrow.
How did Mom react
when they said it wasn't Dad's fault?
She couldn't believe
he was insulted for nothing.
And what did he say?
That it was his responsibility.
Good answer and her?
Alma, I'm tired
of your dumbass questions.
I just want to know if she's softened.
Yes, she has softened.
Leave me alone!
What made you faint
if it wasn't glycemia?
- Please, stop sulking.
- I hate you.
I'll tell you a secret
if you forgive me for Tenco.
- A big one.
- Go on.
We kissed, Benedetta and I.
Don't talk nonsense.
Has anyone seen my glasses?
- Alma, are you ready?
- Wait, I'll be right there.
Alma, please!
- Are you okay?
- How's the baby?
He's fine.
If I talk to him, can he hear me?
Yes, sure.
His ear is the size of this fingernail.
Perhaps even tinier.
You coming?
Yes.
Hi.
Really?
Excellent, I'm pleased.
I can be there in a couple of hours.
Okay?
Okay.
Thanks, Fabio, I'm very happy.
Bye. See you in a bit.
The producer of the film just called.
They read the new version
of the script and...
And...?
They liked it a lot.
They said they're doing the film.
I have to go.
Yes. Do you have to leave right now?
We're leaving too.
So what shall we do, shall we go?
- It was Jean.
- Wait, I'll peel it for you.
Very cute...
Take it.
- And what else have you done?
- We went fishing.
- I caught a huge fish.
- Really?
Huge...
- It wasn't huge?
- No... but it wasn't bad.
And you didn't catch anything?
I helped him out.
Whenever I thought
what a family looked like,
I pictured something like this,
more or less.
Maybe with more sun
or without a dead dog.
Maybe with a little extra time and
without Jean ending up in the hospital.
Maybe with Marco and Benedetta
or with a Game Boy all to myself.
But more or less
the family I wanted was like that.
IF ONLY
subtitles edited by Elvira de Majo
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