Ibiza (2015) - full transcript
Yam broke his brother hand and now he needs to fly to Ibiza to win surf tournament.
IBIZA
Rakash, if I don't come back
in 15 minutes,
call the police.
-No problem, sir.
I go now, I call the police,
I come after 15 minutes.
No! I said, if I don't come back
in 15 minutes
then call the police.
Okay, okay.
I call the police,
if they don't come after 15 minutes,
Rakash call and say,
come on, where are you now?
Maybe my friend now...
Rakash, just don't do anything,
stay here and don't move.
5 days earlier in Israel
Looks like God is with Yam (sea) today!
After catching that wave,
no more swells in the region!
You're Yam's brother, right?
Can you take our picture?
Surfing, my friends, surfing!
Finally.
I can't take it anymore.
I'm bored shitless all day.
Nausea, "Mindsweeper."
I'm about to leave
and I get 300 pages to file. Stat!
So, do you love me?
Where's Eran?
Flirting with Rona.
That's it, Chimpanzees,
Yam makes it to the championship
finals next week!
I told you so.
This is the little leagues,
you should go international.
-Yam! Yam! Yam!
All the girls want a piece of Eran.
You get your tickets?
How could I if you haven't decided
if we're going to Ibiza or to Spain?
And his mom's a travel agent...
Ibiza is in Spain,
you white ass test tube.
I'm liking what I see so far,
everybody, keep it up!
Let's go!
Nice!
Let's do this 8 more times.
Go to break and we'll be right back!
Gilad Yankelevich? Really?
spend a few more bucks,
join a Vipassana retreat.
But I'm not going, Junior.
Dad, Tell Yam that I'm going with them.
Going where?
To Ibiza.
What did you say? -Ibiza?
Maybe he should give Joshua a call?
Are you out of your mind?
Last time I saw that anti-Semite
he aimed a semi-automatic
at a blind 72 year old lady.
Grandma Miriam,
what an amazing woman.
Who's Joshua?
Your father's brother.
What?
-You have a brother?! -No!
When the kid says "with them,"
he means Eran and Daniel, right?
One interns at an accounting firm
and the other's studying medicine!
"Studying medicine!"
Tell me, besides inheriting
my good genes,
and your mother's,
what else have you accomplished?
How about surfing with me some time.
What do you say?
We'll get him a surfboard from Chapa...
You won't regret it.
And if you'd let me get a word in
b । a s--
edgewise
I'd tell you that I qualified for the
national surfing championship finals.
Way to go!
That's amazing!
Did you hear that, Tova?
Your son qualified for the national
nebbish championships!
Good for you!
Now you're a top notch nebbish!
Listen, you do what you want,
but don't drag your little brother
into that hogwash.
Fine, whatever.
Let's go, Junior.
Isn't it about time
you opened your mind?
He doesn't earn the food he eats,
what are you going on about?—
May I?
"Sunsation White."
Once a year,
all the world's top DJs
get together for one night
of rapture in Ibiza.
This is the truth. A heart's desire.
Whoever's been says
it's a once in a lifetime experience.
And then they go back.
There's my balls...
Hey, you dick, what's up?
Ah...
Wow! This crap is delicious!
Who brought it?
Me.
You mean Emma didn't make them?
Even her omelets taste like
bottled water.
Yam, we going in?
Did you wax the board?
Did you replace the fin,
adjust the leash? -No.
Then tell me when you're done.
What's going on here?
There's oil in it
so it goes straight to your head.
Yam, I'm done.
Asaf, how about surfing without me
today?
You said I can only go in with you
when the waves are high.
I also said that dolphins
should live on land, so what?
At your age I was charging the waves,
be a pal...
Pu... pu..
He's trying to say, don't be a "punani."
-What's a "punani?"
Vagina, Asaf.
"Punani" means vagina.
Does this hurt?
Sweetie, don't worry.
You'll be fine.
Doctor, how's my son?
He has to undergo surgery in 10 days.
Oh no,
there goes New York with the girls.
Sir, the surgery will cost
10,000 dollars.
It's not covered
by your health insurance.
If we don't operate,
he might have a permanent limp.
Like "The Hunchback of Notre Dame,"
nothing serious.
Are you insane?
Of course he'll have the surgery.
Of course, sure.
Doctor, this is our son, Yam.
He's responsible for Asaf's injury.
He's the one who took him to the beach,
abandoned him in the raging sea,
he's the one I told
not to mess with the boy!
You want him to have surgery?
Cough up the cash.
No problem.
get the cash.
What did you say?
I said I'll get the cash!
I'm telling you,
take your eye off the ball for a second
and life throws you a curve ball.
Fucking Slim Fit.
Okay, talk to me,
where do things stand?
Are you serious? Nothing?
-Cut it out.
I don't have the money
and I can't ask my mom
coz she's paying for my studies.
This generation sucks their parents dry
until they're 60.
What? Don't look at me,
I'm way overdrawn.
Did I tell you I took Emma
to a cabin up north?
You'll just have to surf in the finals.
Isn't this what you've been dreaming of,
practicing for?
Im not gonna surf anymore, I can't.
I'm on sick leave starting Sunday,
you hear me?
You know what?
If we get the money,
I'm coming to Ibiza.
Hi, sweeties.
What's shakin'?
-Nothing.
Wow!
Oh my God, look at all those people!
Those buggers make tons of money
from those parties.
Reminds me of festivals
of days gone by.
Jacarepagu,? Rio de Janeiro,
Me, Nelson, Mitchel, Jack,
Slav, Donovan, Richard...
Sol°mon and PauL
All of us in one tent...
on the green grass.
Love in our hearts...
I couldn't walk for 2 weeks...
Mom!
Do they have to hear this?
He's so sensitive.
Hey.
Bye, Mrs. Pshutin,
have a good trip.
Your daughter is in good hands.
Emma. Emma is in good hands.
Bye, Mom, have fun.
Ibiza speaking, bitchin' party here.
-Bye, Dad, have fun.
That's it, the eagle has left the nest.
How great that they just left, huh?
Yam, that lucky bastard.
Listen, dude, you trash the house,
it's on you.
Why are you ticked off?
-Me?
When my boyfriend would rather go away
with his friends and not me?
Baby, come on, be a sport.
Your boyfriend wants to chill out
from all the stress 24/7
and all you can think about is sex.
You'd never open your house up
to a party
so that I could go "live my dream"
in Ibiza
and sniff panties all day.
All the women are men snatching whores.
-Emma,
you can't take it back. You agreed,
don't start in on me again.
"Touch-move,"
that's all there is to it.
Think of it
as another phase in our relationship.
As a constructive phase.
"Constructive?"
What am I, a builder?
Get off these stupid arguments already.
Do you even love me?
Give me Jager.
Now he's in the hospital.
Poor thing.
You're such a sweetheart, have a drink.
-No, thanks.
Is there anything we can do?
No.
Actually, if you each have...
200-250 bucks,
that would help me so much.
What? How rude!
No, Eran, no way.
What are you? A 5 year old?
We learned that urine
causes hair growth.
Then pee on your dad's head.
Yuck!
Hey, man, look.
He looks like Tai Museri.
Shall we go back to your place, baby?
We can play sexy accountant
and horny secretary.
What's wrong with you?
You drink oil?
Where are Yam and Eran?
Eran! Eran! Eran!
I don't get it,
you really don't remember a thing?
Ask me again, it won't help.
I said no.
Luckily Eran is studying medicine,
he bandaged me up.
Is this what it's going
to be like in Ibiza, God forbid?
Ibiza?
We used to go to the Sinai,
3 days naked in the sun,
me and Gitzi used to take off...
-Rafi!
What did I say?
I was talking about the trips.
-Sshhh.
"Good morning, world,
"how is everyone today?"
Come on, get up!
Why'd you bring me here?
We made enough money last night.
I gave it all to Garcia, the gardener.
The 2015 national championships begin!
All surfers to the water line.
Listen, Yam, you suck.
Not you again.
I wouldn't sign you up
for the national girls competition.
What's wrong
You sea sick? Chicken.
Shut the fuck up already.
Some of us were in the army...
some of us were top athletes
who scratched Kelly Slater's balls
in Australia.
The waves don't come
to those who don't paddle.
What a kook.
Listen, dude,
I've got this situation here...
you know what I mean, right?
Gimme something.
Let's hear it
for the 2015 national champion!
Bravo!
Bravo! Bravo!
Chapa, how about an envelope
with some moula...?
Forget the envelope,
you're the national champion, man.
"Moula" he says...
Well, loser, you get the cash?
Can I talk to the doctor?
Wait, you had that party,
how much did you make, 1,200?
And that medal,
you can sell it for 12 shekels.
How much more after that?
Nothing, really, just 9,987 dollars.
Surfing.
That's where the big money is.
Buy cheap,
sell high.
Get off my case already, go away!
Listen, go to this website,
www. goldenwave...
Your life's just peachy, huh?
Yeah, peaches and cream.
It's after 12:00,
you know what that means?
That 7 years ago to this day
I saw in between Rona's thighs?
What a day... She dropped
her pencil case right in front of me.
I meant that this is the first
of my sick days
and I can't get them back.
That's how it is in the adult world.
You come here to bust my balls?
I have enough on my mind.
"The Golden Wave competition in Ibiza
is open to all,
"with the finest young surfers
from all over the world.
"The surfing carnival is the perfect
combo of surfing, parties,
"young men and women
and everything in between.
"And this year too
the winner will be granted
"a gold bar worth 150,000 dollars."
I've signed you up.
Start packing, we're going to Ibiza.
Besides, Rona will be there too.
Eran, do me a favor
go buy me a giraffe.
Where do I buy a giraffe?
It sounds awesome, guys, but...
I don't think so.
Surfing is not for me anymore.
Besides, since when are there waves
in Ibiza? It's bogus.
You wanna argue with them?
Once a year they must get some waves.
Not for you? You're the one
who's always talking about signs.
How do you explain the fact that we
learned about the fuckin' 150,000 today?
They're swimming in cash over there.
Pizza costs 200 Euros!
One day after "Sensation" we come back.
-Bro, please, let it go.
Listen man, Emma wants to get married!
I'm gonna marry her because no Ibiza?
Is that what you're telling me?
How will I get it in?
"The height of a giraffe's shoulders
is 3 meters off ground,
"Its color is brown-yellow
with large, dark patches.
"Its coat pattern serves as camouflage
from its enemies in the Savannah."
I can take that mutant
24/7 here at home,
but overseas, no way.
Get outta my way.
Your mom's awesome,
arranging business class...
Who wants barbequed burgers?
All we gotta do is fire up the grill.
You brought meat to the airport,
you moron?
You gonna barbeque in here?
My mom put them in my bag,
lay off me.
I wouldn't mind.
You screwed up too now?
You don't do anything illegal on a trip
that could get you 10 years in jail.
Daniel, we're on our way to Ibiza,
just like you wanted.
Don't we deserve some snacks?
I'm hungry, so what?
Wow, this is awesome.
Can I get some more bread?
The taste of happiness.
Are you going to eat that?
Please.
-Thank you.
Whoa, try the humus with the cake.
It's scary.
Everything okay?
What about Rina,
don't you want to make a move?
I do, but what if she says "no?"
There go my future prospects.
And without a future,
what is the future?
It'll change everything.
You're crazy about her for years
and you don't even know her.
At least try to talk to her.
Time doesn't stand still.
Suddenly you're 30, with a kid,
poop, pee, Minny Mouse diapers.
You were...
blessed with the only love that's real.
Love at first sight.
It's classic, bro,
no technology, no corporations.
Don't take it for granted.
You know what?
Fuck it all.
There you go, dude,
release the beast. Focus.
Focus, release the beast.
Focus!
Come on, get up,
there's a party 5 minutes away.
Look at all these babes, motherfucker!
Now? It's only 10am.
No, tomorrow.
I wanna get laid. Get up already.
Okay, now us, okay?
I'll let my husband's mother in
with her contagious psoriasis
before I let you in.
You're good for nothing.
You don't understand the culture.
Fuck. Three nights, you know?
Three!
Stop, let nature take its course.
We'll get in eventually.
It's so hot.
I feel like a pita with humus.
You're the guys who were wasted
on the flight.
What?
-Me 30!
Everything okay.
They're with me.
Thanks!
I'm Daniel, this is Yam
and this moron is Eran.
Menashe?
-Menashe?
What does he want?
What?
You don't remember me?
I'm Josh.
Benny's brother.
Your super cool uncle from Ibiza.
You're Joshua?
Menashe?
-Yes, Menashe.
Everytime it was "Where is Menashe?"
"Menashe's at the beach."
"Where's Menashe?" "At the beach."
"Where's the kid?" "At the beach."
We started calling him "Yam."
I don't believe it, look at you,
you are a man now.
I haven't seen him since he was
the size of my ball, the small one.
Follow me, okay?
Menashe?
You see this?
For 3 years I was living
in an avocado orchard,
waiting for my commandant to pick me up.
One morning,
a truck of Colombian farmers came by.
They told me the war was over
23 months ago.
That's when I decided
to swim to Ibiza
so I can party until I forget.
In my first week here
I got into a fight with a blender.
I lost 4 pounds of blood.
I imagined it was avocado juice
coming out of my body.
Look, Ibiza is no home.
The madness, the drugs...
it can be too much,
if you can't handle it.
No, I'm here... as a tourist,
I'm chill.
And to think I was about to offer you
some girls, some parties,
the Ibiza lifestyle.
-Damn straight.
Maybe even a job,
if you like the big money.
Actually, Josh,
I'm here for a reason.
I came to surf.
Girls, drugs, parties...
I don't really care.
Never underestimate a woman's power.
A woman parks,
a woman runs you over.
True.
Now, pick one out and go dance a little.
Trust me, it will do you good.
Go, dance a little.
Menashe, take this
so you can always know how to find me.
Girls are very, very important.
Very.
Yes.
Are all Israeli men as tense as you?
I have a lot of responsibilities.
Where are you from?
-Hawaii.
You wish. We all do.
I'm from Italy,
but I'm flying to Hawaii soon.
Maybe I'll come with you.
Why not?
I'll be your arms bearer.
My name is Jennifer.
My name is... name...
Yam.
Yam.
Maybe you want to come
to the beach tomorrow?
Maybe.
"Alexandra 24?"
Hey, sexy...
-Hey.
So... what do you study?
Study, huh?
Yes.
What? No?
Grandma's naked.
Grandma's naked.
Grandma's naked!
Give money!
You have this...
Ibiza, Ibiza, Ibiza...
Hey. -Hey.
Can we?
Yes?
Yes? -Yes.
Yes! Yes.
So...
You are from here?
What?
Hey, hey...
Rich man's whores.
There is no such thing as true love.
It's all about money.
I tend to agree with you,
but I'm telling you...
Let's go,
I want to get up early tomorrow.
Where's Eran?
He went to take a piss hours ago.
So? We're in Ibiza.
He's a big boy, I'm sure he's fine.
Hey.
You pay?
I don't... what?
I don't understand.
She your girlfriend?
No?
Whoa!
You finally got here!
Sir, is all this yours?
I met this girl...
You meet a whore, bro?
My ass is showing!
Yam, get me down!
Eran, I don't know if we can,
you want us to let you loose here?
You'll traumatize the kids,
the pregnant women, the elderly...
Get me down, Yam!
You don't have to understand everything.
Look,
Yam,
this is you, this is the wave.
You come from here and give it to him.
You see?
No, he has to paddle in this angle,
it's simple math!
I'm telling you, he comes from here
and gives it to him!
But that can't be right! What about
specific gravity in the water?
How about not being a gefilte
for once in your life.
Watch out I don't specify your eye,
you twad.
Yeah, right, violence,
that's your solution to everything.
"Your solution?"
Spray me with some DDT,
why don't you.
You tool.
Yam, don't listen to this idiot...
Welcome to the only relaxing spot
in Ibiza. -Wow.
You real|y Me living in lbiza, huh?
Something in the air
makes you feel free.
"Ma ra?"
Sure, no worries, why not?
Ra-ra. Like a chicken.
You asked me what I find in Josh.
Come.
When I was a child,
my father took me surfing all the time.
He didn't care if I missed school
or anything, as long as I was happy.
That's how he was, my dad,
a free spirit.
You see, my dad,
he had a small surfboarding place,
just like this one.
The "Flash"...
Probably the most radical board
there is.
It's either the best surfboard
you'll ever try or the worst.
There is no other way.
They say only a true soul surfer
can handle it.
You sound like the surfing penguin
from the Disney movie.
To be honest,
I don't think I can surf tomorrow.
My brother almost died
because of me,
I pushed him
into this whole surfing thing.
I feel as if
it's not meant to be for me anymore.
Come with me.
What, now?
Are you serious?
What are you doing?
This is what you call a "move."
Look and learn.
"Learn"... Not as if it'll help you.
What? Explain.
Eran, you're...
How can I say this
without offending you?
Look, for people like me,
life is not a porn movie.
I have to work hard
to get some hottie to sit on my nose.
Yam... his life is a German pom film.
And for people like you...
it's an Arab documentary,
in black and white.
You're way down on the food chain.
You have to make peace with the fact
that you're not in the game anymore.
I know, Yam explained it to me.
What has to happen happens.
I guess your destiny
is to only be with Emma.
Shut up, you moron!
Go, get some more ice cream,
I hope an eagle snatches it away.
"Only Emma..." How rude.
"Not in the game," huh?
Hello, Chica.
-Hello, Gwapo.
Good.
So, what are we drinking?
400 Euros, 20 minutes, no anal,
no sagi-sagi, okay?
Only fuckin' sheikhs screw around here!
What happened?
We're out of gas.
Don't worry, someone will come soon,
okay? Keep cool.
Don't have too much fun without me.
Go find him.
Bye.
What...
What's... going on?
You got this white spot.
Are you going?
Sure... yeah... I'm going.
See, I'm going.
Where are your girlfriends?
Those divorcees?
They're at the beach all day
looking for Brazilians
to hit on.
You know,
things that happen abroad stay abroad...
What about you? Are you...
What?
I need a man.
That limits your options.
I mean a real man.
Not someone I have to hit on.
Someone who can read between the lines.
Who'll take the reins.
Who'll make a move without thinking.
I'm kidding.
What do I need?
I need some thrills.
I'm on vacation,
I want to let loose.
I'm always loose.
Loose...
A true cuckoo's nest.
No one knows the real Rona.
My mom always says everyone
is a bit Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
Totally.
Ibiza is beautiful.
You're beautiful.
Yes, it's very beautiful here.
Ibiza...
Well, I'm... going that way.
I'm seeing... I'm meeting...
See you at the Sensation?
Could be.
Hey, Baywatch, you out of gas?
The pump break down?
So, you ran away overseas.
I'm rigid, you flow.
I'm matter, you're water.
You're stuck, Yam, stuck!
You have no backbone,
your skeleton is rotten.
Nothing personal, huh?
Yam, there's no point.
It's all for nothing.
We cannot break.
Welcome to Ibiza!
"Golden Wave" 2015.
First group, right now!
Damn, where is that clown?
Where have you been, you tool?
I'm here now,
that's what counts.
Dip the sausage.
You did it, ah?
Daniel, you're letting life
take you to the dark side.
That woman is a dream.
Here we go!
Yam, you've got this.
-Round one!
For Asaf.
You've got this.
-Ready... Set,
Go!
Yam! Yam! Yam! Yam!
Yam, show those faggots who's boss!
Sshhh... Don't you get
that's an international word?
So what did I say, Nazis?
Italianos.
Pizza...
-Pizza, pasta...
Pasta.
-Pizza, pizza, pizza...
Are you guys hungry?
Pasta...
-Pizza... -Pizza.
Rona!
Vardi?
What are you doing here?
What am I doing here?
What are you doing here?
I heard there's a "kooks" competition
so I signed up.
This is my 7th year in a row,
get a grip.
Remind me how you placed
in the nationals?
I hope your surfboard cracks, you loser.
Go blow.
What do we do?
I don't have another surfboard.
I'm screwed, I can't believe it.
No sweat, I can sell my collection
of Darth Vader dolls.
And I'm getting a return on the B a tax write-off.
Well manage, bro, don't worry.
Yam, get one from Josh.
We have a winner!
What do you find in these guys?
Look what they did to the house.
Has he even said he loves you?
That's not fair,
he's emotionally withdrawn
but I know how he feels inside.
I dated Yam for a while too.
Tamar, that was in 3rd grade,
and you went out twice.
Yes, Emma, but it stretched out
over 4 months.
Okay, can I tell Pitchhada
to bring his friend?
What do you care? Give it a try.
You really think Daniel isn't partying
with all those girls over there?
Of course he isn't,
he knows that would be the end of us.
Forget those Georgian rich guys.
Is money the only thing you care about?
We're not 17 anymore
and I have to secure
my financial future.
I'm going.
You wanna come, come, if not, so not.
Pitchhada can be European too.
-Right.
Hagai! Come here boy.
Yuck, what's with his hair?
He smells like acid.
Hagai, who's my hot doggie?
I told you,
dreams only come true in Ibiza.
You were right, bro.
We're close to the sun here.
Daedalus warned Icarus
not to fly too close to the sun.
What was that?
Icarus had wings of wax, he got too
close to the sun and fell into the sea.
It's this Greek thing
about a man's soul.
Excuse me?
You're single, yes?
Why?
Because you have
a big silicone valley...
What...?
Grow up already.
I'm dying to pee.
Pee on him like you did on Emma's dog.
Tell me you didn't do that.
That was a good one,
and he was so happy...
Hey, I forgot to get chocolate for Asaf.
Hold this.
The gold's in here.
"Slim Fit?"
Wasn't he killed in battle
with the "Upper Taker?"
Dude, I can't move,
he put a spell on my legs
like he did to his rivals.
So, you think my girlfriend is plastic,
huh?!
No, no, Mister Fit.
There's been a terrible
misunderstanding!
He's hitting our shopping bags.
Get the fuck outta here!
Hey...
You see "Slim Fit?!"
Thank you.
What did you do that for?
He started.
Watch over the gold.
Put on your shirt so you don't blind
the beefcake. -Sure.
According to Murphy's Law,
you'll get the skankiest masseuse.
My money's on you.
Don't make me laugh,
I only get the Playboy bunnies.
How are you?
Johnny.
Hello.
Someone loves me too much.
What is this?
Where me?
Hello?
What is this?
This isn't fair.
Hello?
Mommy!
Cinderella, I'm starving, it's Friday!
Let's go already!
Hold your horses.
We're not all rich like you,
some of us are trying to look good
to get Rona.
To get Roma.
"To get a hot chick,
do as the Romans do,"
it's a phrase the players use.
"Rich guys like you"...
Where's the bag?
Hey, Eran, you got the bag, right?
What am I, a 4 year old,
don't you trust me?
I was just asking.
Calm down, man.
Okay, I'm ready. Zeisel?
"Sensation White." Damn!
Listen, you go,
I'll join you later.
Why not come with us?
Because... "Why?" What?"
"How?" "When?"...
Leave me alone!
gotta life besides you guys,
you know?
Your entire world
doesn't revolve around me, okay?
I guess he wants to jerk off.
Have fun.
Where's the bag?
This is aspirin...
I have a headache.
Is this okay?
More and more people are kidnapped
in foreign countries
that you won't ever hear about.
It's increasingly becoming
a crime of concern.
We're being singled out.
Tourists, small businessmen,
journalists
targeted for kidnap abroad.
Asaf,
how's it going, pal?
How are you?
-Partying big time, man.
You still in pain?
-Yeah, no big deal.
What's with you?
Not much, just wanted to tell you
that God's with us.
No way! You won?
You're kidding, right?
-I swear, 150,000.
Now I'll have surfboards
for the next year?
The next year?
The next decade, you moron.
But Yam... I'm not sure
I'll be able to surf, I mean...
Why aren't you returning
my phone calls?
Your brother's in a wheelchair
because of you and you run off to Ibiza?
Benny, lay off me, okay?
I'm not coming home.
Don't worry,
the money will be there on time.
Is this any way to live, Yam?
You wanna teach me how to live?
You wanna tell me
when's the last time you had fun,
the last time you did something
that made you smile?
What do you know?
Oh, and I met your brother, Josh,
he sends regards,
and he's ten times more successful
As you can see,
your daughter has been kidnapped.
It's not me, it's...
peer pressure,
it's me being disappointed
by who I am.
If we don't get 150,000 dollars
by tomorrow,
she's history!
No, no!
How long does it take to make pizza,
dude?
In Hebrew we say,
"Your sister's in a cast."
"Your sister's in a cast."
-Yes.
No, you say,
"My sister's in a cast."
"Your sister's in a cast."
Okay, go, douchebag.
Very good pizza, gracias.
There you are, is your right hand clean?
You use up all the soap?
Everything's A-Okay.
Where's the music,
you know, to dance, move the body?
Eran, what did you do?
Nothing, it's cool.
I found a way to get the money back.
Okay? I got this. Bon appetit.
I love you guys to death.
You're my brothers. Love.
One unit.
Who's gonna give me a hug? You?
Where's the money, Eran?
Where's the gold?
Who cares about the gold!
As long as Asaf gets his operation.
Once I dissected a frog.
Money is no more than a means to an end.
You ever give any thought to the soul?
"If the sun comes out...
"It's a sign..."
-Eran, focus!
Where's the bag?
I lost it, I lost the bag,
but I have an idea.
I solved...
I don't believe this!
I don't... Are you serious?
Tell me you're serious.
For real?
I don't believe you lost...
Check, please!
Yam, forgive me,
but you're not yourself.
What do you want to do?
-What do I want to do?
Let's go see "Swan Lake,"
I hear they got a new ballerina.
That's a great idea!
I didn't know you're into that. I...
I'd show you my video cassettes,
I took classical dance for 4 years
and modern dance for two.
You think you know someone,
you go on vacation with them
and you discover magical
sides and that...
that his name is Menashe!
I am going to slice you up,
you eggplant!
Thank you.
Yes, police?
No!
No police, no.
It's okay.
It's a game, okay, not real.
You see? Me good.
Okay?
Bye, thank you.
Hello.
-Hello, we're here to see Josh.
You can't.
It's fine, I'm family.
Alright.
Yam, we shouldn't be here.
We're no criminals
and this will end badly. -I don't care.
Money doesn't give money,
listen to someone who's been around.
Tell him, I got it all worked out.
You worked it out?
God help us.
Yam, you know Justin Bieber?
He's absolutely awesome.
He's a genius, eh?
He is the John Lennon
of the generation.
Girls, you met Yam,
he's the only family I got.
Except you, of course.
"Baby, baby..."
Josh...
Joshua!
I need to speak to you. Alone.
Of course.
Raul, fix these two gentlemen a drink.
You served in the army, right?
-Yes.
That's the only reason I can trust you.
A guy like you must have been
in some special campaigns.
Yeah, of course.
In Israel everything's "special."
You know, like two chocolate bars
for 5 shekels?
4 popsicles for 10,
3 Bazooka bubble gum for 1 shekel?
Okay, this is a unit.
Nothing compares to a good campaign
with your unit in the army.
Yes.
-Rito Carlito.
The man killed 10 people in one shot.
Bieber.
So, all you have to do
is give this to my friend.
He'll wait outside the party.
You can't miss him, he's huge.
And he'll wear... what's it called...
A gold chain with a big lion, okay?
10 thousand dollars,
cash tomorrow morning. Luck.
Yam? Yam..
What?
I'm sorry, okay?
It wasn't what it looked like, trust me.
I keep thinking about you.
Trust you?
You're just like every other girl.
I finally fall in love
and it's with someone like you.
Ciao.
Think about it,
10,000 dollars in a suitcase.
Bro, this is not the army
and we're not an army squad.
It'll end badly.
He look like a soldier to you?
You know where he was assigned?
Assistant quartermaster...
-Shut up, you idiot.
This zone is a bad force.
No place for a Jedi.
Yoda said that too.
Do you get me?
-Daniel, gimme a break!
He's not your brother, is he?
You wanna come, great.
You don't, that's good too.
Just do me a favor,
stop busting my balls
before I have you do squats
right here and now.
I can't even get an "Energy"
around here.
Forget that, I have something better.
-There he goes the 2nd exemplar.
What? Talk to me, let's hear it.
No, you know what? Let me guess.
You lost my wallet?
Don't you say a word!
There's a thin line
between courage and stupidity.
What's wrong, Daniel, you scared?
Scared to leave Emma?
All we gotta do is get down
in the gutter and float back up.
If anything happens, I'll take the heat.
Okay, Punani?
What's that?
Caffeine pills,
I took one earlier...
It made me insanely sharp.
That's why I said I figured it out.
Did you find the gold?
I got this idea
from "Battlestar Galactica."
Eran, shut up,
before I send you to the hostel
to give me five fingers???
and come back.
You know what your problem is?
-Emma? -Overweight?
Only I can straighten you out.
What have we come too?
Where's the guy?
I don't see the guy.
You see a lion around here?
You must have misunderstood,
I bet he meant the entrance.
Let's split up and find him.
I can't believe a squirt like you
will one day be a real man.
Mommy.
What will become of him?
You'll be a loser.
This is my room.
Wow, it's pink.
I love you.
I don't know what to say,
you took me by surprise.
Don't worry,
you won't say it anymore.
Curiousity killed the cat
and trauma killed the rabbit.
Didn't you know?
-What?
No? Then smell this.
Slim Fit Vader
from the farmer's market galaxy.
Why did you get messd up with him?
You ruined my life.
Why doesn't God intervene?
Stop, you sound like Arkady Duchin.
Who's that with him?
Slim Fit is here with two beefcakes.
They're gunning for us.
How am I supposed to look for the guy?
My dad has a moustache.
I just told Emma that I love her.
Arkady Duchin used to be Russian.
Emma's dad is also Russian...
He got pissed when we broke the crystal
at the party,
so he sent his friends over here
to take care of us.
Everyone wants to kill us!
In the sand I am the man!
-In the sand I am the man!
Louder!
You guys hungry?
Yeah.
What's in the suitcase?
He said not to open it.
Then we won't.
Is he for real?
I'm such an idiot.
I don't believe this.
Let's go over there.
What's up?
You look as if someone told you
MacDonalds is shutting down.
We're going to see Josh.
As you can see,
your daughter has been abducted.
A strange video has surfaced today
which police is convinced is a hoax.
"It's not me, it's the peer pressure,"
cries the kidnapper
and the world fears
a new terrorist cell from Ibiza.
We don't know who the clip is for
that was distributed on YouTube.
The question is,
is this a real abduction
or just a hoax that spun out of control?
Can't bro have a minute to eat?
What's the rush?
"Bro?"
My brother will be in a wheelchair
for months because of you.
Not to mention I hope
we're not about to go to jail.
There he goes again,
thinking about himself.
Why did you want to come to Ibiza?
Huh, Daniel, why?
To help me?
To get me money? No.
To screw someone other than Emma.
It's not my fault
that that's not where I am.
You finally found someone who loves you,
God knows why,
and you wanna screw around
coz you're afraid of feeling good.
You're disgusting.
-Did I say you could talk?
As if you didn't fly half way around
the world just to talk to Rona.
At least if you would have,
but every time you see her...
"Bros," so long.
If we don't get 150,000 by tomorrow
she's history!
What is this, the Gestapo?
This is his mother.
Where's my daughter?
You tell me
or I'm going to the police.
Excuse me, Sir, who are you?
We don't negotiate with terrorists,
you hear me?
I ain't got no cash.
Forgive me, Starsky and Hutch,
I don't know what you're talking about.
Your punk son stole my princess!
Listen to me,
you won't see a dime!
My money's tied up in stocks and bonds.
40 years, 3 exit points.
Now I remember.
When he was 3,
he stole a tangerine from Pauline.
I should have suspected then.
Well, in the meantime
have some refreshments.
It sharpens the memory.
Is it real or a dream,
is it reality or fantasy,
parallel worlds...
Two hours a day, Yankelevich,
that's all you need.
You get a hard on...
like Titanium.
You remind me of Jeannie and Mickey.
We spent a whole week
on the couch in Seattle.
They didn't let me get dressed.
A real amusement park.
Hi. What are you doing here?
The room is dusty.
Get in.
Rona?
Rona, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it.
I lost 150,000 dollars,
I didn't know what to do.
Rona!
I've been waiting for this
for a long time.
You have?
Yes.
Just don't tell your friends, okay?
No one must know.
Why?
Eran...
you're fat and horny.
It's embarrassing.
What?
Hello.
Hello, hello!
"Hello, hello!"
Where's my fucking suitcase?
What, you don't speak English now?
Where is my fucking suitcase?!
Eran...
Someone told me
it's a good place to relax.
Hawaii?
No, I decided to go back home
and finish my degree.
So you also have a flight to catch.
Yup, back to doing nothing.
In the real life I'm a nobody.
Anyway,
I need to take care of something
before I go. Josh, you know...
I was supposed to give it to his friend
but I couldn't find him, it was a mess.
I wouldn't mess with Josh
when it comes to business.
What business? He made a mistake,
there's nothing in there.
Do you really believe Josh would
let you deliver an empty suitcase?
I'll show you.
Okay.
Josh, what's up, bro, it's Yam.
Now listen to me,
you little piece of shit.
You have 3 minutes
to bring me my fucking suitcase back.
Otherwise your friends are my property.
-What?
He's lost it, bro!
The man's insane!
Three minutes, my place.
I told you.
Fuck me.
It's a sign.
The final sign of freedom.
Jenny...
Let's fly to Hawaii.
What? No, but Josh...
-Josh is not a killer.
Trust me,
I saw killers in my life.
Surf and love.
Hawaii?
Let's go.
Hello.
Tell me...
surfing and all the...
what's so good about it?
Every wave has a purpose
and every question has meaning.
Keep it real, man.
Not everyone can surf.
You gotta connect,
it's the only way.
You remind me of my wife.
Do you rent out surfboards?
No way.
-No?
I sell them for a few hours
then people bring them back.
The first sale is free,
go for it,
but it doesn't include VAT.
Gilad Yankelevich?
What the fuck?
I don't believe it.
I'm going to marry
this beautiful woman.
Yam, is everything okay?
No, nothing is okay.
Rakash,
can you take us back to the city?
I can take you to Mumbai,
as long as you pay.
Let's go, we don't have much time.
What are you doing?
-What I need to do.
I have to save my friends,
even if they're stupid.
Jenny,
I'm choosing to do and not letting karma
or some other boss decide for me.
I need you with me.
Rakash, go, go!
No...
Relax, sexy.
We're not going to hurt you.
What are you doing here?
I followed you
because I wanted to apologize.
I love your horniness,
I love this water bed
that you call a belly.
Yes, you're chunky,
but you're what I've been looking for
and I never felt as free
as I do with you.
I'm not ashamed of you.
I'm ashamed of myself.
Eran,
you're my Luke Skywalker.
All you have to do
is say the magic words.
Just say,
"fuck me."
Fucking shit!
No way, I love my girlfriend.
If I die today, I will die like a man.
This isn't your first time, huh?
I think it's better
I stay here, you go.
If I see...
"Where is Yam" after 15 minutes,
I'll call the police.
Good idea?
My idea.
I swear Rakash...
Buddha.
Forgive me for the mess, Josh.
This is not how I wanted it to end.
You know,
they say Bieber was performing,
full concert, solo, with his guitar,
when he was only 7 years old.
How do you explain it?
Hard work, maybe?
Not at this age.
What is it then?
You know, some people
are meant to do something in life.
They're like a predator.
Like my captain in Afghanistan.
He could kill in seconds,
but he never kissed a woman.
So what does a predator do
when something gets in his way?
He releases my friends,
because otherwise he won't
see his suitcase again.
You know, this is funny.
What's so funny?
That the son of the same guy
who never ate avocado
because he was afraid
of the cholesterol
now thinks he's negotiating with me.
At least your brother had the guts
to be a father.
What the fuck?
Raul,
tell Bubik and Rocksteady to bring me
Nikita and the two pussies.
Some friends on Facebook
told me I have a daughter
in Costa Rica.
A father means being with your kids,
making sure they do something
with their lives.
I should have known.
I'm sorry it didn't work out, man.
Trust me, I need that money
more than you can imagine.
Hey, hey, get the fuck out!
It's not a Bar Mitzvah.
And do it quick,
before I change my mind.
Run...
Menashe!!
Go!
-Go, Rakash, go!
Are you okay, bro?
Mama Jukara, this is for you.
Go, go...
I almost slept with someone.
I almost cheated on Emma.
Shit!
Skywalker's boxers,
they're in the hotel.
Don't worry,
we'll find you something on the way.
That's from "Call of Duty", right?
Intense.
I will never see Hawaii.
I will drink your blood, Menashe.
Police? I want to report
a huge drug deal that's going down.
Ten minutes in the airport.
Bald guy, red suit, black suitcase.
Where's my money?
Rakash, I love you.
I love you with all my heart.
Motherfucker!
So, Mr. Josh...
In the end we meet, huh?
Yeah, happy ending, yeah?
Yeah. Depends what happiness
is to you, Mr. Josh.
I see.
Wait, if Josh doesn't have
the real diamond...
Choosing your actions is awesome,
but doing the right thing...
is greatness.
You jerk,
you got a hamburger for yourself?
From now on when you have a question,
write it down and throw it away. Retard.
I'm a retard? You illiterate fool.
He can't even spell the word.
And you wanna be a doctor.
Oh yeah?
I-I-i..
So I guess this is it, huh?
You have a special soul.
You will find your true other half.
What is meant to happen, happens.
He had her for sure.
Where's your sense of romance,
Don de Ie Shmate?
Baby?
Baby!
-You almost gave me a heart attack.
What's going on, you freak?
I love you, Emma.
I don't know where all this is going,
but I love you now
and that's all that matters.
Me too.
Who told you I'm coming back?
I didn't even know you're back.
-Then why are you so wet?
Asshole!
What do you think?;
Where are they from?
They're yours.
There we go.
I got an awesome wave down south,
I'm outta here.
But first,
I have another surprise for you.
This is for you, okay?
Let Dad pay for the operation.
CNN?
Okay, okay.
With an estimated value
of over 50 million dollars,
the "Blue Glory" is finally back
with its legal owners,
thanks to this down on his luck surfer
from Israel.
Yam Cohen was thanked in person
by the princess of Spain
with the medal of heroism, the highest
honor the Spanish nation can bestow.
He also received a sizeable cash reward
for the capture
of Interpol's most wanted man,
The Avocado Ghost."
What's Ibiza gotta do with me?
A slave to life and to Yankelevich.
Trying to get clean.
Because sometimes you have
to exit through a door,
let loose, flow with nature,
that's all there is to it.
I think.
Benny, you starting again?
Take it slow
so you don't pull us back with you.
Chapa, you fiend, what's going on?
Relax.
See you in Hawaii.
Loser, you bring the cookies?
Translation: Tammy King
Subtitles: Cinematyp Studios Ltd.
Rakash, if I don't come back
in 15 minutes,
call the police.
-No problem, sir.
I go now, I call the police,
I come after 15 minutes.
No! I said, if I don't come back
in 15 minutes
then call the police.
Okay, okay.
I call the police,
if they don't come after 15 minutes,
Rakash call and say,
come on, where are you now?
Maybe my friend now...
Rakash, just don't do anything,
stay here and don't move.
5 days earlier in Israel
Looks like God is with Yam (sea) today!
After catching that wave,
no more swells in the region!
You're Yam's brother, right?
Can you take our picture?
Surfing, my friends, surfing!
Finally.
I can't take it anymore.
I'm bored shitless all day.
Nausea, "Mindsweeper."
I'm about to leave
and I get 300 pages to file. Stat!
So, do you love me?
Where's Eran?
Flirting with Rona.
That's it, Chimpanzees,
Yam makes it to the championship
finals next week!
I told you so.
This is the little leagues,
you should go international.
-Yam! Yam! Yam!
All the girls want a piece of Eran.
You get your tickets?
How could I if you haven't decided
if we're going to Ibiza or to Spain?
And his mom's a travel agent...
Ibiza is in Spain,
you white ass test tube.
I'm liking what I see so far,
everybody, keep it up!
Let's go!
Nice!
Let's do this 8 more times.
Go to break and we'll be right back!
Gilad Yankelevich? Really?
spend a few more bucks,
join a Vipassana retreat.
But I'm not going, Junior.
Dad, Tell Yam that I'm going with them.
Going where?
To Ibiza.
What did you say? -Ibiza?
Maybe he should give Joshua a call?
Are you out of your mind?
Last time I saw that anti-Semite
he aimed a semi-automatic
at a blind 72 year old lady.
Grandma Miriam,
what an amazing woman.
Who's Joshua?
Your father's brother.
What?
-You have a brother?! -No!
When the kid says "with them,"
he means Eran and Daniel, right?
One interns at an accounting firm
and the other's studying medicine!
"Studying medicine!"
Tell me, besides inheriting
my good genes,
and your mother's,
what else have you accomplished?
How about surfing with me some time.
What do you say?
We'll get him a surfboard from Chapa...
You won't regret it.
And if you'd let me get a word in
b । a s--
edgewise
I'd tell you that I qualified for the
national surfing championship finals.
Way to go!
That's amazing!
Did you hear that, Tova?
Your son qualified for the national
nebbish championships!
Good for you!
Now you're a top notch nebbish!
Listen, you do what you want,
but don't drag your little brother
into that hogwash.
Fine, whatever.
Let's go, Junior.
Isn't it about time
you opened your mind?
He doesn't earn the food he eats,
what are you going on about?—
May I?
"Sunsation White."
Once a year,
all the world's top DJs
get together for one night
of rapture in Ibiza.
This is the truth. A heart's desire.
Whoever's been says
it's a once in a lifetime experience.
And then they go back.
There's my balls...
Hey, you dick, what's up?
Ah...
Wow! This crap is delicious!
Who brought it?
Me.
You mean Emma didn't make them?
Even her omelets taste like
bottled water.
Yam, we going in?
Did you wax the board?
Did you replace the fin,
adjust the leash? -No.
Then tell me when you're done.
What's going on here?
There's oil in it
so it goes straight to your head.
Yam, I'm done.
Asaf, how about surfing without me
today?
You said I can only go in with you
when the waves are high.
I also said that dolphins
should live on land, so what?
At your age I was charging the waves,
be a pal...
Pu... pu..
He's trying to say, don't be a "punani."
-What's a "punani?"
Vagina, Asaf.
"Punani" means vagina.
Does this hurt?
Sweetie, don't worry.
You'll be fine.
Doctor, how's my son?
He has to undergo surgery in 10 days.
Oh no,
there goes New York with the girls.
Sir, the surgery will cost
10,000 dollars.
It's not covered
by your health insurance.
If we don't operate,
he might have a permanent limp.
Like "The Hunchback of Notre Dame,"
nothing serious.
Are you insane?
Of course he'll have the surgery.
Of course, sure.
Doctor, this is our son, Yam.
He's responsible for Asaf's injury.
He's the one who took him to the beach,
abandoned him in the raging sea,
he's the one I told
not to mess with the boy!
You want him to have surgery?
Cough up the cash.
No problem.
get the cash.
What did you say?
I said I'll get the cash!
I'm telling you,
take your eye off the ball for a second
and life throws you a curve ball.
Fucking Slim Fit.
Okay, talk to me,
where do things stand?
Are you serious? Nothing?
-Cut it out.
I don't have the money
and I can't ask my mom
coz she's paying for my studies.
This generation sucks their parents dry
until they're 60.
What? Don't look at me,
I'm way overdrawn.
Did I tell you I took Emma
to a cabin up north?
You'll just have to surf in the finals.
Isn't this what you've been dreaming of,
practicing for?
Im not gonna surf anymore, I can't.
I'm on sick leave starting Sunday,
you hear me?
You know what?
If we get the money,
I'm coming to Ibiza.
Hi, sweeties.
What's shakin'?
-Nothing.
Wow!
Oh my God, look at all those people!
Those buggers make tons of money
from those parties.
Reminds me of festivals
of days gone by.
Jacarepagu,? Rio de Janeiro,
Me, Nelson, Mitchel, Jack,
Slav, Donovan, Richard...
Sol°mon and PauL
All of us in one tent...
on the green grass.
Love in our hearts...
I couldn't walk for 2 weeks...
Mom!
Do they have to hear this?
He's so sensitive.
Hey.
Bye, Mrs. Pshutin,
have a good trip.
Your daughter is in good hands.
Emma. Emma is in good hands.
Bye, Mom, have fun.
Ibiza speaking, bitchin' party here.
-Bye, Dad, have fun.
That's it, the eagle has left the nest.
How great that they just left, huh?
Yam, that lucky bastard.
Listen, dude, you trash the house,
it's on you.
Why are you ticked off?
-Me?
When my boyfriend would rather go away
with his friends and not me?
Baby, come on, be a sport.
Your boyfriend wants to chill out
from all the stress 24/7
and all you can think about is sex.
You'd never open your house up
to a party
so that I could go "live my dream"
in Ibiza
and sniff panties all day.
All the women are men snatching whores.
-Emma,
you can't take it back. You agreed,
don't start in on me again.
"Touch-move,"
that's all there is to it.
Think of it
as another phase in our relationship.
As a constructive phase.
"Constructive?"
What am I, a builder?
Get off these stupid arguments already.
Do you even love me?
Give me Jager.
Now he's in the hospital.
Poor thing.
You're such a sweetheart, have a drink.
-No, thanks.
Is there anything we can do?
No.
Actually, if you each have...
200-250 bucks,
that would help me so much.
What? How rude!
No, Eran, no way.
What are you? A 5 year old?
We learned that urine
causes hair growth.
Then pee on your dad's head.
Yuck!
Hey, man, look.
He looks like Tai Museri.
Shall we go back to your place, baby?
We can play sexy accountant
and horny secretary.
What's wrong with you?
You drink oil?
Where are Yam and Eran?
Eran! Eran! Eran!
I don't get it,
you really don't remember a thing?
Ask me again, it won't help.
I said no.
Luckily Eran is studying medicine,
he bandaged me up.
Is this what it's going
to be like in Ibiza, God forbid?
Ibiza?
We used to go to the Sinai,
3 days naked in the sun,
me and Gitzi used to take off...
-Rafi!
What did I say?
I was talking about the trips.
-Sshhh.
"Good morning, world,
"how is everyone today?"
Come on, get up!
Why'd you bring me here?
We made enough money last night.
I gave it all to Garcia, the gardener.
The 2015 national championships begin!
All surfers to the water line.
Listen, Yam, you suck.
Not you again.
I wouldn't sign you up
for the national girls competition.
What's wrong
You sea sick? Chicken.
Shut the fuck up already.
Some of us were in the army...
some of us were top athletes
who scratched Kelly Slater's balls
in Australia.
The waves don't come
to those who don't paddle.
What a kook.
Listen, dude,
I've got this situation here...
you know what I mean, right?
Gimme something.
Let's hear it
for the 2015 national champion!
Bravo!
Bravo! Bravo!
Chapa, how about an envelope
with some moula...?
Forget the envelope,
you're the national champion, man.
"Moula" he says...
Well, loser, you get the cash?
Can I talk to the doctor?
Wait, you had that party,
how much did you make, 1,200?
And that medal,
you can sell it for 12 shekels.
How much more after that?
Nothing, really, just 9,987 dollars.
Surfing.
That's where the big money is.
Buy cheap,
sell high.
Get off my case already, go away!
Listen, go to this website,
www. goldenwave...
Your life's just peachy, huh?
Yeah, peaches and cream.
It's after 12:00,
you know what that means?
That 7 years ago to this day
I saw in between Rona's thighs?
What a day... She dropped
her pencil case right in front of me.
I meant that this is the first
of my sick days
and I can't get them back.
That's how it is in the adult world.
You come here to bust my balls?
I have enough on my mind.
"The Golden Wave competition in Ibiza
is open to all,
"with the finest young surfers
from all over the world.
"The surfing carnival is the perfect
combo of surfing, parties,
"young men and women
and everything in between.
"And this year too
the winner will be granted
"a gold bar worth 150,000 dollars."
I've signed you up.
Start packing, we're going to Ibiza.
Besides, Rona will be there too.
Eran, do me a favor
go buy me a giraffe.
Where do I buy a giraffe?
It sounds awesome, guys, but...
I don't think so.
Surfing is not for me anymore.
Besides, since when are there waves
in Ibiza? It's bogus.
You wanna argue with them?
Once a year they must get some waves.
Not for you? You're the one
who's always talking about signs.
How do you explain the fact that we
learned about the fuckin' 150,000 today?
They're swimming in cash over there.
Pizza costs 200 Euros!
One day after "Sensation" we come back.
-Bro, please, let it go.
Listen man, Emma wants to get married!
I'm gonna marry her because no Ibiza?
Is that what you're telling me?
How will I get it in?
"The height of a giraffe's shoulders
is 3 meters off ground,
"Its color is brown-yellow
with large, dark patches.
"Its coat pattern serves as camouflage
from its enemies in the Savannah."
I can take that mutant
24/7 here at home,
but overseas, no way.
Get outta my way.
Your mom's awesome,
arranging business class...
Who wants barbequed burgers?
All we gotta do is fire up the grill.
You brought meat to the airport,
you moron?
You gonna barbeque in here?
My mom put them in my bag,
lay off me.
I wouldn't mind.
You screwed up too now?
You don't do anything illegal on a trip
that could get you 10 years in jail.
Daniel, we're on our way to Ibiza,
just like you wanted.
Don't we deserve some snacks?
I'm hungry, so what?
Wow, this is awesome.
Can I get some more bread?
The taste of happiness.
Are you going to eat that?
Please.
-Thank you.
Whoa, try the humus with the cake.
It's scary.
Everything okay?
What about Rina,
don't you want to make a move?
I do, but what if she says "no?"
There go my future prospects.
And without a future,
what is the future?
It'll change everything.
You're crazy about her for years
and you don't even know her.
At least try to talk to her.
Time doesn't stand still.
Suddenly you're 30, with a kid,
poop, pee, Minny Mouse diapers.
You were...
blessed with the only love that's real.
Love at first sight.
It's classic, bro,
no technology, no corporations.
Don't take it for granted.
You know what?
Fuck it all.
There you go, dude,
release the beast. Focus.
Focus, release the beast.
Focus!
Come on, get up,
there's a party 5 minutes away.
Look at all these babes, motherfucker!
Now? It's only 10am.
No, tomorrow.
I wanna get laid. Get up already.
Okay, now us, okay?
I'll let my husband's mother in
with her contagious psoriasis
before I let you in.
You're good for nothing.
You don't understand the culture.
Fuck. Three nights, you know?
Three!
Stop, let nature take its course.
We'll get in eventually.
It's so hot.
I feel like a pita with humus.
You're the guys who were wasted
on the flight.
What?
-Me 30!
Everything okay.
They're with me.
Thanks!
I'm Daniel, this is Yam
and this moron is Eran.
Menashe?
-Menashe?
What does he want?
What?
You don't remember me?
I'm Josh.
Benny's brother.
Your super cool uncle from Ibiza.
You're Joshua?
Menashe?
-Yes, Menashe.
Everytime it was "Where is Menashe?"
"Menashe's at the beach."
"Where's Menashe?" "At the beach."
"Where's the kid?" "At the beach."
We started calling him "Yam."
I don't believe it, look at you,
you are a man now.
I haven't seen him since he was
the size of my ball, the small one.
Follow me, okay?
Menashe?
You see this?
For 3 years I was living
in an avocado orchard,
waiting for my commandant to pick me up.
One morning,
a truck of Colombian farmers came by.
They told me the war was over
23 months ago.
That's when I decided
to swim to Ibiza
so I can party until I forget.
In my first week here
I got into a fight with a blender.
I lost 4 pounds of blood.
I imagined it was avocado juice
coming out of my body.
Look, Ibiza is no home.
The madness, the drugs...
it can be too much,
if you can't handle it.
No, I'm here... as a tourist,
I'm chill.
And to think I was about to offer you
some girls, some parties,
the Ibiza lifestyle.
-Damn straight.
Maybe even a job,
if you like the big money.
Actually, Josh,
I'm here for a reason.
I came to surf.
Girls, drugs, parties...
I don't really care.
Never underestimate a woman's power.
A woman parks,
a woman runs you over.
True.
Now, pick one out and go dance a little.
Trust me, it will do you good.
Go, dance a little.
Menashe, take this
so you can always know how to find me.
Girls are very, very important.
Very.
Yes.
Are all Israeli men as tense as you?
I have a lot of responsibilities.
Where are you from?
-Hawaii.
You wish. We all do.
I'm from Italy,
but I'm flying to Hawaii soon.
Maybe I'll come with you.
Why not?
I'll be your arms bearer.
My name is Jennifer.
My name is... name...
Yam.
Yam.
Maybe you want to come
to the beach tomorrow?
Maybe.
"Alexandra 24?"
Hey, sexy...
-Hey.
So... what do you study?
Study, huh?
Yes.
What? No?
Grandma's naked.
Grandma's naked.
Grandma's naked!
Give money!
You have this...
Ibiza, Ibiza, Ibiza...
Hey. -Hey.
Can we?
Yes?
Yes? -Yes.
Yes! Yes.
So...
You are from here?
What?
Hey, hey...
Rich man's whores.
There is no such thing as true love.
It's all about money.
I tend to agree with you,
but I'm telling you...
Let's go,
I want to get up early tomorrow.
Where's Eran?
He went to take a piss hours ago.
So? We're in Ibiza.
He's a big boy, I'm sure he's fine.
Hey.
You pay?
I don't... what?
I don't understand.
She your girlfriend?
No?
Whoa!
You finally got here!
Sir, is all this yours?
I met this girl...
You meet a whore, bro?
My ass is showing!
Yam, get me down!
Eran, I don't know if we can,
you want us to let you loose here?
You'll traumatize the kids,
the pregnant women, the elderly...
Get me down, Yam!
You don't have to understand everything.
Look,
Yam,
this is you, this is the wave.
You come from here and give it to him.
You see?
No, he has to paddle in this angle,
it's simple math!
I'm telling you, he comes from here
and gives it to him!
But that can't be right! What about
specific gravity in the water?
How about not being a gefilte
for once in your life.
Watch out I don't specify your eye,
you twad.
Yeah, right, violence,
that's your solution to everything.
"Your solution?"
Spray me with some DDT,
why don't you.
You tool.
Yam, don't listen to this idiot...
Welcome to the only relaxing spot
in Ibiza. -Wow.
You real|y Me living in lbiza, huh?
Something in the air
makes you feel free.
"Ma ra?"
Sure, no worries, why not?
Ra-ra. Like a chicken.
You asked me what I find in Josh.
Come.
When I was a child,
my father took me surfing all the time.
He didn't care if I missed school
or anything, as long as I was happy.
That's how he was, my dad,
a free spirit.
You see, my dad,
he had a small surfboarding place,
just like this one.
The "Flash"...
Probably the most radical board
there is.
It's either the best surfboard
you'll ever try or the worst.
There is no other way.
They say only a true soul surfer
can handle it.
You sound like the surfing penguin
from the Disney movie.
To be honest,
I don't think I can surf tomorrow.
My brother almost died
because of me,
I pushed him
into this whole surfing thing.
I feel as if
it's not meant to be for me anymore.
Come with me.
What, now?
Are you serious?
What are you doing?
This is what you call a "move."
Look and learn.
"Learn"... Not as if it'll help you.
What? Explain.
Eran, you're...
How can I say this
without offending you?
Look, for people like me,
life is not a porn movie.
I have to work hard
to get some hottie to sit on my nose.
Yam... his life is a German pom film.
And for people like you...
it's an Arab documentary,
in black and white.
You're way down on the food chain.
You have to make peace with the fact
that you're not in the game anymore.
I know, Yam explained it to me.
What has to happen happens.
I guess your destiny
is to only be with Emma.
Shut up, you moron!
Go, get some more ice cream,
I hope an eagle snatches it away.
"Only Emma..." How rude.
"Not in the game," huh?
Hello, Chica.
-Hello, Gwapo.
Good.
So, what are we drinking?
400 Euros, 20 minutes, no anal,
no sagi-sagi, okay?
Only fuckin' sheikhs screw around here!
What happened?
We're out of gas.
Don't worry, someone will come soon,
okay? Keep cool.
Don't have too much fun without me.
Go find him.
Bye.
What...
What's... going on?
You got this white spot.
Are you going?
Sure... yeah... I'm going.
See, I'm going.
Where are your girlfriends?
Those divorcees?
They're at the beach all day
looking for Brazilians
to hit on.
You know,
things that happen abroad stay abroad...
What about you? Are you...
What?
I need a man.
That limits your options.
I mean a real man.
Not someone I have to hit on.
Someone who can read between the lines.
Who'll take the reins.
Who'll make a move without thinking.
I'm kidding.
What do I need?
I need some thrills.
I'm on vacation,
I want to let loose.
I'm always loose.
Loose...
A true cuckoo's nest.
No one knows the real Rona.
My mom always says everyone
is a bit Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
Totally.
Ibiza is beautiful.
You're beautiful.
Yes, it's very beautiful here.
Ibiza...
Well, I'm... going that way.
I'm seeing... I'm meeting...
See you at the Sensation?
Could be.
Hey, Baywatch, you out of gas?
The pump break down?
So, you ran away overseas.
I'm rigid, you flow.
I'm matter, you're water.
You're stuck, Yam, stuck!
You have no backbone,
your skeleton is rotten.
Nothing personal, huh?
Yam, there's no point.
It's all for nothing.
We cannot break.
Welcome to Ibiza!
"Golden Wave" 2015.
First group, right now!
Damn, where is that clown?
Where have you been, you tool?
I'm here now,
that's what counts.
Dip the sausage.
You did it, ah?
Daniel, you're letting life
take you to the dark side.
That woman is a dream.
Here we go!
Yam, you've got this.
-Round one!
For Asaf.
You've got this.
-Ready... Set,
Go!
Yam! Yam! Yam! Yam!
Yam, show those faggots who's boss!
Sshhh... Don't you get
that's an international word?
So what did I say, Nazis?
Italianos.
Pizza...
-Pizza, pasta...
Pasta.
-Pizza, pizza, pizza...
Are you guys hungry?
Pasta...
-Pizza... -Pizza.
Rona!
Vardi?
What are you doing here?
What am I doing here?
What are you doing here?
I heard there's a "kooks" competition
so I signed up.
This is my 7th year in a row,
get a grip.
Remind me how you placed
in the nationals?
I hope your surfboard cracks, you loser.
Go blow.
What do we do?
I don't have another surfboard.
I'm screwed, I can't believe it.
No sweat, I can sell my collection
of Darth Vader dolls.
And I'm getting a return on the B a tax write-off.
Well manage, bro, don't worry.
Yam, get one from Josh.
We have a winner!
What do you find in these guys?
Look what they did to the house.
Has he even said he loves you?
That's not fair,
he's emotionally withdrawn
but I know how he feels inside.
I dated Yam for a while too.
Tamar, that was in 3rd grade,
and you went out twice.
Yes, Emma, but it stretched out
over 4 months.
Okay, can I tell Pitchhada
to bring his friend?
What do you care? Give it a try.
You really think Daniel isn't partying
with all those girls over there?
Of course he isn't,
he knows that would be the end of us.
Forget those Georgian rich guys.
Is money the only thing you care about?
We're not 17 anymore
and I have to secure
my financial future.
I'm going.
You wanna come, come, if not, so not.
Pitchhada can be European too.
-Right.
Hagai! Come here boy.
Yuck, what's with his hair?
He smells like acid.
Hagai, who's my hot doggie?
I told you,
dreams only come true in Ibiza.
You were right, bro.
We're close to the sun here.
Daedalus warned Icarus
not to fly too close to the sun.
What was that?
Icarus had wings of wax, he got too
close to the sun and fell into the sea.
It's this Greek thing
about a man's soul.
Excuse me?
You're single, yes?
Why?
Because you have
a big silicone valley...
What...?
Grow up already.
I'm dying to pee.
Pee on him like you did on Emma's dog.
Tell me you didn't do that.
That was a good one,
and he was so happy...
Hey, I forgot to get chocolate for Asaf.
Hold this.
The gold's in here.
"Slim Fit?"
Wasn't he killed in battle
with the "Upper Taker?"
Dude, I can't move,
he put a spell on my legs
like he did to his rivals.
So, you think my girlfriend is plastic,
huh?!
No, no, Mister Fit.
There's been a terrible
misunderstanding!
He's hitting our shopping bags.
Get the fuck outta here!
Hey...
You see "Slim Fit?!"
Thank you.
What did you do that for?
He started.
Watch over the gold.
Put on your shirt so you don't blind
the beefcake. -Sure.
According to Murphy's Law,
you'll get the skankiest masseuse.
My money's on you.
Don't make me laugh,
I only get the Playboy bunnies.
How are you?
Johnny.
Hello.
Someone loves me too much.
What is this?
Where me?
Hello?
What is this?
This isn't fair.
Hello?
Mommy!
Cinderella, I'm starving, it's Friday!
Let's go already!
Hold your horses.
We're not all rich like you,
some of us are trying to look good
to get Rona.
To get Roma.
"To get a hot chick,
do as the Romans do,"
it's a phrase the players use.
"Rich guys like you"...
Where's the bag?
Hey, Eran, you got the bag, right?
What am I, a 4 year old,
don't you trust me?
I was just asking.
Calm down, man.
Okay, I'm ready. Zeisel?
"Sensation White." Damn!
Listen, you go,
I'll join you later.
Why not come with us?
Because... "Why?" What?"
"How?" "When?"...
Leave me alone!
gotta life besides you guys,
you know?
Your entire world
doesn't revolve around me, okay?
I guess he wants to jerk off.
Have fun.
Where's the bag?
This is aspirin...
I have a headache.
Is this okay?
More and more people are kidnapped
in foreign countries
that you won't ever hear about.
It's increasingly becoming
a crime of concern.
We're being singled out.
Tourists, small businessmen,
journalists
targeted for kidnap abroad.
Asaf,
how's it going, pal?
How are you?
-Partying big time, man.
You still in pain?
-Yeah, no big deal.
What's with you?
Not much, just wanted to tell you
that God's with us.
No way! You won?
You're kidding, right?
-I swear, 150,000.
Now I'll have surfboards
for the next year?
The next year?
The next decade, you moron.
But Yam... I'm not sure
I'll be able to surf, I mean...
Why aren't you returning
my phone calls?
Your brother's in a wheelchair
because of you and you run off to Ibiza?
Benny, lay off me, okay?
I'm not coming home.
Don't worry,
the money will be there on time.
Is this any way to live, Yam?
You wanna teach me how to live?
You wanna tell me
when's the last time you had fun,
the last time you did something
that made you smile?
What do you know?
Oh, and I met your brother, Josh,
he sends regards,
and he's ten times more successful
As you can see,
your daughter has been kidnapped.
It's not me, it's...
peer pressure,
it's me being disappointed
by who I am.
If we don't get 150,000 dollars
by tomorrow,
she's history!
No, no!
How long does it take to make pizza,
dude?
In Hebrew we say,
"Your sister's in a cast."
"Your sister's in a cast."
-Yes.
No, you say,
"My sister's in a cast."
"Your sister's in a cast."
Okay, go, douchebag.
Very good pizza, gracias.
There you are, is your right hand clean?
You use up all the soap?
Everything's A-Okay.
Where's the music,
you know, to dance, move the body?
Eran, what did you do?
Nothing, it's cool.
I found a way to get the money back.
Okay? I got this. Bon appetit.
I love you guys to death.
You're my brothers. Love.
One unit.
Who's gonna give me a hug? You?
Where's the money, Eran?
Where's the gold?
Who cares about the gold!
As long as Asaf gets his operation.
Once I dissected a frog.
Money is no more than a means to an end.
You ever give any thought to the soul?
"If the sun comes out...
"It's a sign..."
-Eran, focus!
Where's the bag?
I lost it, I lost the bag,
but I have an idea.
I solved...
I don't believe this!
I don't... Are you serious?
Tell me you're serious.
For real?
I don't believe you lost...
Check, please!
Yam, forgive me,
but you're not yourself.
What do you want to do?
-What do I want to do?
Let's go see "Swan Lake,"
I hear they got a new ballerina.
That's a great idea!
I didn't know you're into that. I...
I'd show you my video cassettes,
I took classical dance for 4 years
and modern dance for two.
You think you know someone,
you go on vacation with them
and you discover magical
sides and that...
that his name is Menashe!
I am going to slice you up,
you eggplant!
Thank you.
Yes, police?
No!
No police, no.
It's okay.
It's a game, okay, not real.
You see? Me good.
Okay?
Bye, thank you.
Hello.
-Hello, we're here to see Josh.
You can't.
It's fine, I'm family.
Alright.
Yam, we shouldn't be here.
We're no criminals
and this will end badly. -I don't care.
Money doesn't give money,
listen to someone who's been around.
Tell him, I got it all worked out.
You worked it out?
God help us.
Yam, you know Justin Bieber?
He's absolutely awesome.
He's a genius, eh?
He is the John Lennon
of the generation.
Girls, you met Yam,
he's the only family I got.
Except you, of course.
"Baby, baby..."
Josh...
Joshua!
I need to speak to you. Alone.
Of course.
Raul, fix these two gentlemen a drink.
You served in the army, right?
-Yes.
That's the only reason I can trust you.
A guy like you must have been
in some special campaigns.
Yeah, of course.
In Israel everything's "special."
You know, like two chocolate bars
for 5 shekels?
4 popsicles for 10,
3 Bazooka bubble gum for 1 shekel?
Okay, this is a unit.
Nothing compares to a good campaign
with your unit in the army.
Yes.
-Rito Carlito.
The man killed 10 people in one shot.
Bieber.
So, all you have to do
is give this to my friend.
He'll wait outside the party.
You can't miss him, he's huge.
And he'll wear... what's it called...
A gold chain with a big lion, okay?
10 thousand dollars,
cash tomorrow morning. Luck.
Yam? Yam..
What?
I'm sorry, okay?
It wasn't what it looked like, trust me.
I keep thinking about you.
Trust you?
You're just like every other girl.
I finally fall in love
and it's with someone like you.
Ciao.
Think about it,
10,000 dollars in a suitcase.
Bro, this is not the army
and we're not an army squad.
It'll end badly.
He look like a soldier to you?
You know where he was assigned?
Assistant quartermaster...
-Shut up, you idiot.
This zone is a bad force.
No place for a Jedi.
Yoda said that too.
Do you get me?
-Daniel, gimme a break!
He's not your brother, is he?
You wanna come, great.
You don't, that's good too.
Just do me a favor,
stop busting my balls
before I have you do squats
right here and now.
I can't even get an "Energy"
around here.
Forget that, I have something better.
-There he goes the 2nd exemplar.
What? Talk to me, let's hear it.
No, you know what? Let me guess.
You lost my wallet?
Don't you say a word!
There's a thin line
between courage and stupidity.
What's wrong, Daniel, you scared?
Scared to leave Emma?
All we gotta do is get down
in the gutter and float back up.
If anything happens, I'll take the heat.
Okay, Punani?
What's that?
Caffeine pills,
I took one earlier...
It made me insanely sharp.
That's why I said I figured it out.
Did you find the gold?
I got this idea
from "Battlestar Galactica."
Eran, shut up,
before I send you to the hostel
to give me five fingers???
and come back.
You know what your problem is?
-Emma? -Overweight?
Only I can straighten you out.
What have we come too?
Where's the guy?
I don't see the guy.
You see a lion around here?
You must have misunderstood,
I bet he meant the entrance.
Let's split up and find him.
I can't believe a squirt like you
will one day be a real man.
Mommy.
What will become of him?
You'll be a loser.
This is my room.
Wow, it's pink.
I love you.
I don't know what to say,
you took me by surprise.
Don't worry,
you won't say it anymore.
Curiousity killed the cat
and trauma killed the rabbit.
Didn't you know?
-What?
No? Then smell this.
Slim Fit Vader
from the farmer's market galaxy.
Why did you get messd up with him?
You ruined my life.
Why doesn't God intervene?
Stop, you sound like Arkady Duchin.
Who's that with him?
Slim Fit is here with two beefcakes.
They're gunning for us.
How am I supposed to look for the guy?
My dad has a moustache.
I just told Emma that I love her.
Arkady Duchin used to be Russian.
Emma's dad is also Russian...
He got pissed when we broke the crystal
at the party,
so he sent his friends over here
to take care of us.
Everyone wants to kill us!
In the sand I am the man!
-In the sand I am the man!
Louder!
You guys hungry?
Yeah.
What's in the suitcase?
He said not to open it.
Then we won't.
Is he for real?
I'm such an idiot.
I don't believe this.
Let's go over there.
What's up?
You look as if someone told you
MacDonalds is shutting down.
We're going to see Josh.
As you can see,
your daughter has been abducted.
A strange video has surfaced today
which police is convinced is a hoax.
"It's not me, it's the peer pressure,"
cries the kidnapper
and the world fears
a new terrorist cell from Ibiza.
We don't know who the clip is for
that was distributed on YouTube.
The question is,
is this a real abduction
or just a hoax that spun out of control?
Can't bro have a minute to eat?
What's the rush?
"Bro?"
My brother will be in a wheelchair
for months because of you.
Not to mention I hope
we're not about to go to jail.
There he goes again,
thinking about himself.
Why did you want to come to Ibiza?
Huh, Daniel, why?
To help me?
To get me money? No.
To screw someone other than Emma.
It's not my fault
that that's not where I am.
You finally found someone who loves you,
God knows why,
and you wanna screw around
coz you're afraid of feeling good.
You're disgusting.
-Did I say you could talk?
As if you didn't fly half way around
the world just to talk to Rona.
At least if you would have,
but every time you see her...
"Bros," so long.
If we don't get 150,000 by tomorrow
she's history!
What is this, the Gestapo?
This is his mother.
Where's my daughter?
You tell me
or I'm going to the police.
Excuse me, Sir, who are you?
We don't negotiate with terrorists,
you hear me?
I ain't got no cash.
Forgive me, Starsky and Hutch,
I don't know what you're talking about.
Your punk son stole my princess!
Listen to me,
you won't see a dime!
My money's tied up in stocks and bonds.
40 years, 3 exit points.
Now I remember.
When he was 3,
he stole a tangerine from Pauline.
I should have suspected then.
Well, in the meantime
have some refreshments.
It sharpens the memory.
Is it real or a dream,
is it reality or fantasy,
parallel worlds...
Two hours a day, Yankelevich,
that's all you need.
You get a hard on...
like Titanium.
You remind me of Jeannie and Mickey.
We spent a whole week
on the couch in Seattle.
They didn't let me get dressed.
A real amusement park.
Hi. What are you doing here?
The room is dusty.
Get in.
Rona?
Rona, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it.
I lost 150,000 dollars,
I didn't know what to do.
Rona!
I've been waiting for this
for a long time.
You have?
Yes.
Just don't tell your friends, okay?
No one must know.
Why?
Eran...
you're fat and horny.
It's embarrassing.
What?
Hello.
Hello, hello!
"Hello, hello!"
Where's my fucking suitcase?
What, you don't speak English now?
Where is my fucking suitcase?!
Eran...
Someone told me
it's a good place to relax.
Hawaii?
No, I decided to go back home
and finish my degree.
So you also have a flight to catch.
Yup, back to doing nothing.
In the real life I'm a nobody.
Anyway,
I need to take care of something
before I go. Josh, you know...
I was supposed to give it to his friend
but I couldn't find him, it was a mess.
I wouldn't mess with Josh
when it comes to business.
What business? He made a mistake,
there's nothing in there.
Do you really believe Josh would
let you deliver an empty suitcase?
I'll show you.
Okay.
Josh, what's up, bro, it's Yam.
Now listen to me,
you little piece of shit.
You have 3 minutes
to bring me my fucking suitcase back.
Otherwise your friends are my property.
-What?
He's lost it, bro!
The man's insane!
Three minutes, my place.
I told you.
Fuck me.
It's a sign.
The final sign of freedom.
Jenny...
Let's fly to Hawaii.
What? No, but Josh...
-Josh is not a killer.
Trust me,
I saw killers in my life.
Surf and love.
Hawaii?
Let's go.
Hello.
Tell me...
surfing and all the...
what's so good about it?
Every wave has a purpose
and every question has meaning.
Keep it real, man.
Not everyone can surf.
You gotta connect,
it's the only way.
You remind me of my wife.
Do you rent out surfboards?
No way.
-No?
I sell them for a few hours
then people bring them back.
The first sale is free,
go for it,
but it doesn't include VAT.
Gilad Yankelevich?
What the fuck?
I don't believe it.
I'm going to marry
this beautiful woman.
Yam, is everything okay?
No, nothing is okay.
Rakash,
can you take us back to the city?
I can take you to Mumbai,
as long as you pay.
Let's go, we don't have much time.
What are you doing?
-What I need to do.
I have to save my friends,
even if they're stupid.
Jenny,
I'm choosing to do and not letting karma
or some other boss decide for me.
I need you with me.
Rakash, go, go!
No...
Relax, sexy.
We're not going to hurt you.
What are you doing here?
I followed you
because I wanted to apologize.
I love your horniness,
I love this water bed
that you call a belly.
Yes, you're chunky,
but you're what I've been looking for
and I never felt as free
as I do with you.
I'm not ashamed of you.
I'm ashamed of myself.
Eran,
you're my Luke Skywalker.
All you have to do
is say the magic words.
Just say,
"fuck me."
Fucking shit!
No way, I love my girlfriend.
If I die today, I will die like a man.
This isn't your first time, huh?
I think it's better
I stay here, you go.
If I see...
"Where is Yam" after 15 minutes,
I'll call the police.
Good idea?
My idea.
I swear Rakash...
Buddha.
Forgive me for the mess, Josh.
This is not how I wanted it to end.
You know,
they say Bieber was performing,
full concert, solo, with his guitar,
when he was only 7 years old.
How do you explain it?
Hard work, maybe?
Not at this age.
What is it then?
You know, some people
are meant to do something in life.
They're like a predator.
Like my captain in Afghanistan.
He could kill in seconds,
but he never kissed a woman.
So what does a predator do
when something gets in his way?
He releases my friends,
because otherwise he won't
see his suitcase again.
You know, this is funny.
What's so funny?
That the son of the same guy
who never ate avocado
because he was afraid
of the cholesterol
now thinks he's negotiating with me.
At least your brother had the guts
to be a father.
What the fuck?
Raul,
tell Bubik and Rocksteady to bring me
Nikita and the two pussies.
Some friends on Facebook
told me I have a daughter
in Costa Rica.
A father means being with your kids,
making sure they do something
with their lives.
I should have known.
I'm sorry it didn't work out, man.
Trust me, I need that money
more than you can imagine.
Hey, hey, get the fuck out!
It's not a Bar Mitzvah.
And do it quick,
before I change my mind.
Run...
Menashe!!
Go!
-Go, Rakash, go!
Are you okay, bro?
Mama Jukara, this is for you.
Go, go...
I almost slept with someone.
I almost cheated on Emma.
Shit!
Skywalker's boxers,
they're in the hotel.
Don't worry,
we'll find you something on the way.
That's from "Call of Duty", right?
Intense.
I will never see Hawaii.
I will drink your blood, Menashe.
Police? I want to report
a huge drug deal that's going down.
Ten minutes in the airport.
Bald guy, red suit, black suitcase.
Where's my money?
Rakash, I love you.
I love you with all my heart.
Motherfucker!
So, Mr. Josh...
In the end we meet, huh?
Yeah, happy ending, yeah?
Yeah. Depends what happiness
is to you, Mr. Josh.
I see.
Wait, if Josh doesn't have
the real diamond...
Choosing your actions is awesome,
but doing the right thing...
is greatness.
You jerk,
you got a hamburger for yourself?
From now on when you have a question,
write it down and throw it away. Retard.
I'm a retard? You illiterate fool.
He can't even spell the word.
And you wanna be a doctor.
Oh yeah?
I-I-i..
So I guess this is it, huh?
You have a special soul.
You will find your true other half.
What is meant to happen, happens.
He had her for sure.
Where's your sense of romance,
Don de Ie Shmate?
Baby?
Baby!
-You almost gave me a heart attack.
What's going on, you freak?
I love you, Emma.
I don't know where all this is going,
but I love you now
and that's all that matters.
Me too.
Who told you I'm coming back?
I didn't even know you're back.
-Then why are you so wet?
Asshole!
What do you think?;
Where are they from?
They're yours.
There we go.
I got an awesome wave down south,
I'm outta here.
But first,
I have another surprise for you.
This is for you, okay?
Let Dad pay for the operation.
CNN?
Okay, okay.
With an estimated value
of over 50 million dollars,
the "Blue Glory" is finally back
with its legal owners,
thanks to this down on his luck surfer
from Israel.
Yam Cohen was thanked in person
by the princess of Spain
with the medal of heroism, the highest
honor the Spanish nation can bestow.
He also received a sizeable cash reward
for the capture
of Interpol's most wanted man,
The Avocado Ghost."
What's Ibiza gotta do with me?
A slave to life and to Yankelevich.
Trying to get clean.
Because sometimes you have
to exit through a door,
let loose, flow with nature,
that's all there is to it.
I think.
Benny, you starting again?
Take it slow
so you don't pull us back with you.
Chapa, you fiend, what's going on?
Relax.
See you in Hawaii.
Loser, you bring the cookies?
Translation: Tammy King
Subtitles: Cinematyp Studios Ltd.