Horror Hospital (1973) - full transcript

Now make a clean job of it,
Frederick.

The car was washed this morning.

Now, Frederick.

That'll teach them to
try and run away from us.

Be sure not to let it
happen again, Frederick.

♪ My blood runs stone cold

♪ I'm looking at the
golden eyes of evil ♪

♪ And the mark of death

♪ Is painted everywhere I go

♪ In the black of the night

♪ And the moon's
shimmering light ♪



♪ Something ain't right

♪ Something ain't right

♪ Something ain't right

♪ Something is wrong

Look at that.

They stole my song.

Whole week's work up the spout.

Silly little red faggot
swirling about in his own smoke.

Who does she think she is?

Greeta Garbo?

Looks more like a Lemon
Meringue Pie on heat.

What you want, faggot boy, hey?

♪ And you mind, take some
time outside ♪

Oh, I'm getting out of
this bloody music business.



All I did was make those
shits a present of a song.

- Have you been
snorting coke again, Jason?

Piss off.

You're quite right, Jason,
you should get away.

Yes Jason, go away to the
country for a few days.

You could do
with a rest.

Yes, and you'll need
the funny farm.

Hey, look at this.

A holiday.

Yeah, that's a good idea.

I think I will.

Sun and fun for the under 30's.

Well that's me, just.

Hairy Holidays.

Yeah, I fancy something
a little hairy.

Yeah, might be some nice
birds down there.

Ah, come on in.

What can I do for you?

Well it's this uh,
Hairy Holiday.

Just what do you have in mind?

How about a nice sunny
trip to the Bahamas?

Oh.

A cheap charter to the
sand dunes of the Sahara?

Ah, here we are, just the thing.

How about a few days
in the country,

fresh air, birds, flowers

and storm your way
back to health?

Ah yes, you could do with a
few early nights, couldn't you?

Yes, this is what I
was thinking of.

How much does it cost?

Well for you dear, we'll
make a special price,

25 pounds for the whole week,
all in.

Yes, well, that seems all right.

Uh, I'd like to go now, today.

Well here's the address

and the instructions
how to get there

and there's one of their cards.

Ah, thanks.

No, no, no pay when
you get there.

But if you ever change your mind

about that trip to the Bahamas,

come and see me and we'll work
something out together, eh?

Oh yes, sure.

Goodbye, young man

and enjoy yourselves.

Hi, that taste good?

It's not bad, thank
you very much.

Well you're lucky, I didn't
have time for any lunch.

Here, would you like one
of these apples?

I think I'll go and
get some coffee.

There's no need to get
so uptight about things.

I'm not gonna rape you.

I'm sorry,

but I'm always a bit timid
with people on trains.

Would you like a piece of
cheese as well?

Right, let's start again.

Where are you going?

To visit my aunt.

It's rather strange really.

I've never met her.

Well she used to run a house

in the red light
district of Hamburg

before the second World War.

But my mother had a
terrible rile with her

because of her whore house

and I was never
allowed to meet her,

but now mother's died
and Aunt Harris

is my only living relative.

Oh Harris wasn't her real name.

She always wore
Harris tweed suits.

That's how she got her nickname.

She has to execute my
mother's will.

But why can't you?

Well because,

isn't it funny how
one doesn't mind

telling strangers secrets?

You see, mother never married
and I'm well, illegitimate.

Oh hell, nobody gives a damn

about that sort of
thing now-a-days.

No, not now, but they did
in those days.

That's why mother and Aunt
Harris never saw eye-to-eye.

Aunt Harris accused my
mother of being a hypocrite,

but why shouldn't she
run a brothel

when her sister wasn't
even married?

I think that's why mother
stayed single all her life,

just to spite my aunt.

Then the war came and
Aunt Harris met up with

this strange Finnish doctor.

The brothel was bombed and she
moved to Helsinki with him.

He's a real weirdie, old Storm.

Oh so you're going to
Brittle House too?

How did you guess?

Well old Storm
advertised in the paper

for his health hotel
and I'm gonna go there

and try and get myself together.

Had a bad time with a
group I've been with.

Really, what happened?

Not much, had a rile of a
song I wrote and lost me job.

Was it a good song?

Well I thought so.

So did our manager, that's
why he slung me out.

Will you sing it for me now?

♪ No

I wrote to my aunt and asked her

to send a car to the station.

We can give you a
lift if you like.

Fantastic.

Anyway, your Dr. Storm is
supposed to have

this really weird therapy
which is supposed to

cure all your hangups in a week.

I can just imagine them getting
up to something like that.

Why?

Oh nothing.

Popular place, isn't it?

Mm.

All right.

Your tickets please.

Oh yeah,

okay?

You sure you wrote to your aunt?

Well she didn't reply,
but I did post the letter

over a week ago in London.

Well they'll be here soon.

Oh come on, let's go
and sit down.

Look, there must be a
bus or something.

I'll go and ask the old man.

Yeah, excuse me,

could you tell me how to
get to Brittle House Manor?

We were gonna be met,
but nobody came.

You go up the slope,

turn right,

it's about two miles
up the road.

There's a sign.

Right, thanks.

Hello?

Is that the manor?

Well, you have two here
and they have not been met.

Yes, I've sent them
on their way.

You sure you don't want
me to take the case?

No, no thanks.

Oh shit.

At this rate, we'll
catch pneumonia

before we even get to
the health hotel.

I'd give anything for a
nice cup of tea.

Yeah, me too.

With a touch of something in it.

Definitely.

Oh, blimey.

Oh look, look, we'll go and
shelter in that old arch, yes?

Yeah.

Oh hey, you're nice.

What's your name?

Judy, Judy Peters, what's yours?

Jason, Jason Jones,
pleased to meet you.

Oh.

Listen, Judy, let's run
back to the station.

Jesus, I'd rather
spend the night

on the platform than here, yes?

Yes.

Right.

Thank you.

Cheery, isn't it?

Jolly little place.

My you look like a couple
of drowned rats.

You'd better come inside.

- Hi, I'm Jason Jones.

Really?

You didn't reserve.

Well, I've come from
Hairy Holidays.

Oh, I can see that.

Well, I have got one room left.

But you don't understand,
we're not exactly together.

Yet.

Well what is it then?

I have only got one room.

You'll have to take it
for the night anyway.

But you don't understand, I'm
here to see my Aunt Harris.

You're,

I thought I wrote and
told you not to come.

So you're Aunt Harris?

Well I didn't get a letter.

Well, we'll talk
about that later.

You'd better go and
change your wet things.

Frederick will show you
to your room.

It's a large room.

You'll be able to
arrange something.

Just married or is it a
couple of runaways then?

We had a couple of runaways
this morning.

No games after 10:00,

if you want to get
your health back.

It's all this advertising
in the newspapers

that brings people
like you here.

It's more like a hospital
than a health spa.

I hope you'll be tidier than
the people who had that room.

Nothing to worry about.

Uh, we all have our little
accidents, you know?

Now um, you'll hear the
gong for dinner so

why don't you make
yourselves comfortable

and get settled in?

Little lack of tenants.

Won't be anywhere
left to go to soon.

Ah.

Hello?

You know who this is.

Well Pollack, I've only
had one this week.

Hm, that magazine that
you advertise in

can't have a very
large circulation.

And your husband's health thing

can't have much appeal, my dear.

Remember this time, I
want to get paid.

Anyway, my spies have told me
you've only got two, not one.

You're wrong as usual, Pollack.

The other one's a niece of mine.

I didn't know you had
any relatives

that wanted to visit you
anymore.

Neither did I.

And it's a bloody nuisance.

Certainly complicates things.

Well nevermind dear.

Take care and remember,
blood is thicker than water.

Oh go to hell.

Oh, she doesn't want them there,

I'll send 'em somewhere else,
I suppose.

Jason, pass me the towel.

How long are you going
to stay here?

Oh, don't know really.

I never think about the future.

Few days, I guess.

Here, let me dry your hair.

I'm not so sure I want
to stay here very long.

It's a very strange
feeling in this house.

Don't be so touchy.

I think I'd better
take a shower.

Thought I'd come and
chat while you splash.

Help me.

Hello little girl.

And how are you?

Hm, I am getting rather hungry.

Come on, Jason.

Let's have some of
this health food.

There's nothing
healthier than uh,

sex.

Let's save it for after dinner.

Hello, we've just arrived.

How long have you been here?

How's the food here?

Well, you two seem to have
settled in quite nicely.

Our friends here seem to have

settled in rather too nicely.

Don't you think, Jason?

Aunt Harris, what's that thing

they've all got on their heads?

Well don't concern
yourself about them.

They're very happy.

They're advanced students.

They don't speak again
until they've been cured.

Cured of what?

Of what they came here for.

It will all be explained to you

when you meet Dr. Storm.

What the fuck's going on here?

There's no need for bad
language, young man.

Millie has an acute
nervous disorder

and Dr. Storm has still to
perform his medical on her.

I think I'd like to go
to our room now.

Yes, I'll come with you.

Very well then.

Sleep well.

Don't forget to
brush your teeth.

So you lie down for a minute,
Judy.

You'll be all right.

Jason, do you really
think that girl

was suffering from a
nervous disorder?

Well she was
certainly hysterical

whatever she was suffering from.

Gave me such a shock,

especially those two men
that came to take her away.

You just stay quiet
for a minute.

I'll get a cold towel
for your head.

There we go.

Women can be very troublesome,
Mr. Jones.

But then so can little men.

Oh my goodness.

When you leave here, young lady,

this sort of thing won't
distress you anymore.

Well I want to leave right now.

Olga, who is this young lady?

She's my late sister's daughter.

I thought you wrote and
told her not to come.

Well I did.

Guess who was supposed to
have posted the letter.

You don't have to leave
here tonight.

There's no way you can
possibly go anywhere.

The grounds have been closed.

So stay in your room and
you'll be quite safe.

Don't forget to
brush your teeth.

Jason, what are
we going to do?

I'm so afraid.

I'm a little scared myself.

But I'd like to know
what's going on here.

What do you think he's
doing to those kids?

I don't know.

He seems to have them
under his control.

We'll stay here until
everyone's gone to bed,

then we'll take a look around.

Try and have a little rest now.

Don't do anything silly.

I wouldn't want anything
to happen to you.

Well I can take care of myself.

And you too.

You first.

Oh.

- Thank God I met
you on the train.

I don't know what I would have
done if I'd been here alone.

There must be a way out of
here somewhere.

Look, I'm going to take
a look around.

If you want something, shout.

Jason.

Jason,

Jason.

Jason!

Judy!

Pollack is here.

He's being difficult.

He wants more money.

Then give it to him.

But--

A man like Pollack should
always get what he deserves.

Oh very well then.

Pollack will be leaving
in five minutes.

Deal with him.

Mirror mirror on the wall,

don't say a word,
I know it all.

Here you are, Pollack.

In Hamburg, in the old days,

we had ways of dealing
with blackmailers.

Oh come now, beautiful.

Blackmail is a very strong word.

After all, none of us are
perfect, are we?

Well you'd better go now
before the dogs smell a rat.

Oh, if you really think so.

Yes.

'Til we meet again.

Good day, dear lady.

Good day.

Oh how kind.

- Morning.

Jesus.

Are you people going out
of your minds?

Why?

What have you done with Judy?

What was going on with
that girl last night?

And what goes on downstairs
behind those locked doors, eh?

It leads down to the
gymnasium and then--

Yes, and then what?

And then Dr. Storm's laboratory.

What laboratory and what
goes on in there?

That's where they do
the operation.

Operation?

I don't know.

Something to do with
their heads.

There's a lot of electrical
equipment in there.

Didn't I just see that guy,
Pollack,

being slaughtered down
there in the driveway?

Yeah, he was being difficult.

Let me go, let me go!

I'm just as much a
prisoner here as you are.

I'll talk to you later.

Good morning, Jason.

I suppose you've been
wondering what's going on here?

You're damn right I have.

Where's Judy?

All in good time, dear boy.

You deserve an explanation
and you shall have one.

Come, I'll show you around.

This is the gymnasium

where we keep our
young guests fit.

Oh you know Judy's Aunt Harris,
don't you?

Hello Jason.

Did you sleep well?

Watch Jason.

These young people are
completely under my control.

Olga.

You see?

Just like puppets and
I'm the puppet master.

Puppets who feel no pain.

Now Jason, go and look
through that grill over there.

- Judy!

Judy!

Judy!

It's no use shouting, Jason.

They can't hear you.

We've given them a
sleeping draft.

It's very simple, we
make an incision

and perform a little operation.

It's Millie's turn next,
then Judy

and yours will come soon.

Like hell it will!

It's no use, Jason!

You won't get very far!

It's no use, Jason,
you won't get very far.

Oh God, God, God.

Enough of this.

Lock him up
immediately in the cell.

Let me out of here!

If you ever change your mind

about that trip to the
Bahamas, come and see me.

We can work something
out together, eh?

- It's very
simple you see.

We make an incision.

Yes, Jason, rather more
than an incision,

a tunnel into the mind,
through which I can grab

a little thought with
my psychic hands

or put one there, make it serve
my purpose or your purpose,

make you think that my
purpose is your purpose,

but I need more subjects
to find the missing link.

It'll be Millie's turn next,
then Judy's

and your turn will come soon.

It'll be Millie's turn next.

Christian, I've been thinking.

Have you, my dear?

I've been thinking
for many years

and I've achieved quite
a lot in that time,

don't you think?

Yes, rather too much I'm afraid.

You no longer confide in me,

after that appalling
business with Pollack

and now this young man, Jason,

someone's going to
get suspicious.

Don't be ridiculous.

Anybody who's ever
had any dealings

with that scoundrel Pollack

will only be too glad
to see the back of him.

As for these young people,

they come and go like
flies these days,

dirty ones at that.

Their disappearance
will hardly be noticed.

Besides, you don't think
I've engineered

all this equipment for all
these years for nothing, do you?

Pass me the scalpel.

Well,

this is the last one I'll
help you with.

Very well, Olga.

And what will you do?

I can always go back to Hamburg.

You're too old to run
a whorehouse.

Thank you.

People twice my age have
managed to make ends meet.

Yes.

Hello?

Is that the manor?

It's old Carter down
at the station.

Well what does he want?

Hm.

He says he's just sent
someone else up.

Who?

We're not expecting anyone.

A young man.

Well you'd better get yourself
tidied up and meet him.

Thank you.

Who are you?

I'm Abraham Warren.

Well what do you want?

Um, I'm looking for
my girlfriend.

See, we had a fight a few
weeks ago and she disappeared.

I found this magazine with
your advertisement in it and,

well I wondered if she was here.

This is her photograph here.

I see.

Wait here a moment, will you?

You see, I told you so.

Things are not going as
smoothly as you think.

Lock him up with the other one.

Who knows how many people
know that he came here.

I'm getting out now and I'm
going to take Judy with me.

Send the car around
to the front.

I'm going to pack my things.

Very well, if that's
what you want.

- Hey, wake up.

Wake up, man.

Huh.

What are you doing here?

Don't quite know myself.

Came to find my chick.

What's going on around here?

Oh it's all so bloody crazy.

But the important this is,
we've got to get out of here.

The place is run by
some kooky doctor

and his wife who brainwash
a lot of young kids

and I haven't found out why yet.

Jesus Christ.

Have you seen a chick
called Millie yet?

May be too late for her.

Oh my God, if they hurt her,

if I get a hold of them,
I'll tear them to pieces!

Cool it, cool it.

Our only chance is a freaky
little dwarf they've got.

Seems he's been given a
bad time too.

Well how do we contact him?

Oh search me, he's a wily
little bugger.

He usually brings the food in,

but whatever we do,
we've got to keep cool.

They can fill this box with
some kind of knockout gas.

What happened?

You fainted, my dear.

Jason, where's Jason?

He's having a little rest.

Where's Aunt Harris?

She's gone away.

Where?

Oh well, in a way you
could say that she's

gone back to where
she came from.

That terrible face,

I saw a terrible face!

Don't get excited, my dear,

the imagination can play
strange tricks.

Come, I want to show
you something.

Bring in our pretty
little friend.

You remember our little
friend from last night?

You see how much happier
she looks now.

Come towards me, Millie.

Stop.

Start.

Stop.

Hold out your hand.

Put it down.

You see, Judy, she's
absolutely obedient.

Whatever my will desires.

What does your will desire,
doctor?

That you'll find out when
it's your turn.

♪ Goodnight

Grub up, boys,
luncheon is served.

- Boy,

what have you done to
get us out of this place?

- Yeah, what
have you done?

Patience is a virtue that
youth doesn't know much about.

I've slipped the two
guards a mickey fin.

It's should work any minute now.

How many times it's been eaten,
eh?

Throw it over to the
two wimpies.

Let me out now.

Five,

four,

three,

two,

one.

Right, well done.

Now where's Judy?

She's locked in the room,
next to the gym.

You know the way.

Judy.

Judy!

Wake up, Judy!

Judy!

Jason.

- Oh Judy.

Oh Jason, I thought I'd
never see you again.

Oh it's horrible, it's horrible
what they did to Millie.

That terrible face.

What are you talking about?

- Millie, what
do you know about Millie?

Who are you?

Oh he's Abraham.

He's a friend, came here
looking for his chick.

Sorry, there's no
time to explain.

We've got to get away
from this dreadful place.

Right, let's go, quick.

Millie,

Millie, baby.

Millie, baby.

Millie, baby, I'm sorry.

What have they done to you?

What have they done to her?

What in God's name?

How convenient to find
you all here together.

You can tell me over dinner
how you escaped from your cell.

It won't make any difference
how much of the truth

you find out now.

I wasn't always a cripple.

I was very attractive
to women once.

In the late 20's, before
Stalin came to power,

I was a disciple of
Acadamission Pavlov.

Wow.

Then when Stalin did
come to power,

he installed many
young scientists,

stupid adolescents who didn't
know what they were doing.

Very soon, my
laboratories were overrun

by these young Turks
and I was made to leave.

Being told what to do by
these stupid students,

so I went to Finland where I
started my own private zoo.

There I made
experiments with animals.

After a while, animals
were not enough.

I can't work with
animals anymore.

I must have humans!

And that, Judy, is where your
Aunt Harris was most useful.

I used to visit her
whorehouse as a student

and knew her well.

She supplied me with
young, wretched creatures

who had found their way
into her establishment,

but who redeemed themselves
by becoming my puppets.

But my technology wasn't
what it is today.

Isn't that so, Frederick?

It was simple, even crude.

In one of my experiments,

I applied Acadamission
Pavlov's Theory

of conditioned reflexes
to sexual behavior.

In my view, Freud had failed.

I succeeded in
controlling human desire,

but there was still a
missing link.

My subjects could not
yet fulfill the desires

I had created in them.

they were not a very pretty
sight after the operation.

Bastard!

Cow's brains, torn from
their mother's womb

before they were born.

Virgin brains, never had
a thought in their life.

One day, a hunting man
had the impertinence

to enter my fortress.

The fool didn't
understand what he saw.

And in his confused ignorance,

he set my zoo on fire.

I tried desperately to
put out the fire,

but I only just
managed to escape

with the injuries that
I sustain to this day.

Unfortunately not so
attractive to women.

The hunter was still
less fortunate.

He was found the next day,

among the ashes of
my laboratory,

charred and impaled on a
still smoldering stake.

Shish kabob.

Now,

tell me,

how did you manage to
drug the guards

and get out of your cell?

No!

No!

No!

Take the girl and prepare her.

I'll operate tonight.

No, no, Jason help me!

Help me!

And get these two out
of my sight.

What are we gonna do now, man?

He's already got Millie,
now he's gonna get Judy.

Not if I can help it.

Yeah and how do you think
you're gonna be able to help it?

I don't know, but there must
be a way out of here somehow.

A lot of use you were.

Anyway, how'd you get
yourself into this mess?

Me?

I was born into it.

My mother, she was shipped
to Dr. Storm by Hairy's,

like freight from Hamburg,

like little lambs to
the slaughter,

only they didn't know
she was pregnant

and I was born later.

After Dr. Storm operated on her,

they kept me and I've been
their whipping dog ever since.

You're sick, you're ill,
you're insane!

Can't possibly get away
with this forever.

That creature you've
got hidden away

will turn on you one
of these days!

Tomorrow, none of these
considerations

will have any meaning for you.

No, no!
This will calm you down.

No!

No!

Make sure you guard her
well this time.

There've been too many
mistakes for one day.

Well my friends,

there'll be three more
companions for you very soon.

Hey man, come here.

Look at this.

Look at this window here.

There's a ledge outside that
runs to the window by the hall.

Yeah, sure man and
who the hell's

gonna climb through that?

It's not even large enough
for a kid to get through.

Well Frederick, it
looks as though

you're gonna be a
hero after all.

- What?

What are you talking about?

Very simple, you see.

All you've got to do

is climb onto
Abraham's shoulders,

climb through the window,

crawl along the ledge,

enter the window by the hallway,

knock out the guard

and open the door
from the outside.

Oh no, no, I won't do it!

I won't do it.

No!

I won't do it!

I absolutely refuse!

No, I won't do it!

No!
Well, it's either that

or having you head
sliced off too.

Well, all right then.

All right.

Here you are, take this,
you'll need it.

Oh,

I was almost the hero,
wasn't I?

You sure were, man.

Wasn't he, Abraham?

Sure you were, man.

We'll fix you up.

No, there isn't time.

It's Dr. Storm.

What about him?

You don't know the whole story.

Dr. Storm is

Judy, we've got to help Judy.

That'll teach him not to
wear his crash helmet.

- Judy,

Judy, come out.

Come out of it, Judy.

Come on.

Judy!

Come on, wake up.

Judy, come on.

come on.

Jason.

They gave me some kind
of injection.

- Doesn't matter,
doesn't matter, come on.

We'll pull you out of it.

But he was going to
operate on me.

He's insane.

I'll say he's insane,
these zombies,

these ridiculous machines
and where's Millie?

Come on.

Let's get to the quick!

It's Aunt Harris.

Come on, there's nothing
we can do for her.

Jesus.

Dr. Storm!

- Millie!

Millie.

Oh Millie.

Oh, there he goes!

Leave Millie, come on!

Abraham, come on, you must go!

Quick!

Jason!

Jason!

Shit!

All right.

Quick, the guards,
around the back.

For Christ's sake, man,

the place is going up
like a haystack!

Abraham, you drive!

There he is!

Get after the son-of-a-bitch!

Okay kids, hold on.

Right Abraham, drive at
him and then past him.

What do you mean?

Just do as I say.

We're going to give him
some of his own medicine.

Your tickets, please.

It's all right, it's only me.

Really Jason, you are the limit.

Don't be so silly.

And you cheer up, eh?

Don't you think you should
have given that to the police?

Man, it's such a
fantastic story,

they'd never believe it.