Dom, kotoryy postroil Svift (1982) - full transcript
An immaculate, vivid and breathtaking implementation of Swift's romanticism.
Attention, we're starting.
Silence in the studio, attention.
Swift!
Let's have the portrait.
- Maybe another picture?
- Why? It looks like him.
- But it shouldn't look like him.
We don't need an accurate depiction,
we're not making a biography.
Music!
Now this is much better.
You think he looks more like Swift now?
Yes, he had quite the imagination and loved to clown around.
Get rid of the eyes, that's enough.
Right.
Zoom in, show the carriage.
The doctor exits.
He's looking around.
He's riding on.
He's having breakfast and looking around.
Looking around.
He's never been here before.
Prepare for Dublin.
Bells!
Hey, gentlemen!
Tell me what happened. Who died?
Swift died.
- Who?
- The dean of St Patrick's Cathedral.
What a pity.
When did this happen?
Today.
At five o'clock, as usual.
What do you mean, "as usual"?
You know, as usual.
Do you know what you're saying, dolt?
Sir, you must be from far away,
you don't know our dean.
He is a very punctual man,
organized and neat in all he does,
and when he passes to the next world,
he does it precisely at five.
So he's alive?
Who?
Swift.
How can he be alive
if we just told you he died?
The newspapers already published the news
and the bell has been tolling for an hour.
Here he comes.
Who?
Swift.
Ask him if you don't believe us.
Is he blind?
Not at all, sir.
The dean's vision is excellent.
But he often sees everything inside out.
That's why he wears a mask -
to avoid disturbing others with the look in his eyes.
Excuse me, sir.
I'm Dr Simpson. I've been sent to you from London
by request from the Board of Trustees.
And now these people tell me
that you have, pardon me, died.
Very amusing!
But if you will allow me to say so, this is nonsense.
Just a flight of fancy, which I will attempt to cure.
I'm a doctor,
Here's a letter confirming my appointment.
Who are you?
Us?
We're Mr Swift's guests.
We have been kindly invited into his home
to keep him company at his own wake.
So you're all freeloaders?
Of course, sir! Aren't you one as well?
When there isn't enough wine on the table,
Let the downpour fall!
When there is too much intelligence in your head,
Let the downpour fall!
As soon as all your thoughts and dreams
drown in the rainwater,
You will feel such joy!
Don't think about anything,
Don't think, don't think, don't think!
Let the downpour fall!
Let the wind howl!
Let the downpour fall!
Let it fall in a torrent!
Forget and don't think about your death.
Let the downpour fall!
The shorter your weekdays,
the longer your holiday.
Let the downpour fall!
Who knows what will happen
when the appointed hour comes,
And what the last threshold will be like,
And whether any reward awaits beyond it -
Don't think about it!
Don't think, don't think, don't think!
Let the downpour fall!
Let the wind howl!
Let the downpour fall!
Let it fall in a torrent!
Let the downpour fall!
Let the wind howl!
THE HOUSE THAT SWIFT BUILT
This is the fourth one this week.
Shall I throw it out or preserve it as a historical monument?
Preserve it.
What do you think, Patrick,
who could have done this?
One of the guests.
Are there many guests today?
As usual, ma'am.
Who is here?
The giant. The people from the floating island.
The what do you call them, the horses.
The Houyhnhnms.
I've told you before, Patrick, they are Houyhnhnms.
Forgive me, ma'am, the Houy-
And that gentleman who lives forever.
Mr Someone.
Him.
And the lilliputians.
The lilliputians are darting around the house
all the time. All the time.
They're always in the way.
Direct everyone to the garden.
I wish Mr Swift to have his tea in peace.
I keep telling them, but do you think they listen?
They peer in at the windows,
barge in at the doors,
And butlers have feelings too.
I keep that in mind when I pay your salary.
Good evening, Patrick.
Good evening sir. You were asked to go to the garden.
- Or is it still morning?
- Very possible. To the garden, please.
- In that case, good morning.
- Good morning! To the garden!
- And the date? What date is it?
- October 5th.
- And the year?
- You asked me that yesterday.
- And what year was it yesterday?
- The same one as today, 1745.
- Pardon, is that before Christ or after?
- Patrick, did you prepare the tea?
- No, ma'am.
Thus far I only prepared the cup.
Have I warned you that we expect a new doctor?
Not yet, ma'am.
- Lancelot! Lancelot!
- Well? Are we going to keep yelling all day?
- Lancelot!..
- Hello.
- Hello. What do you want?
I am Gluum the Giant.
I need Lancelot.
Everyone needs Lancelot.
Remind me, who is that?
A brave knight,
the glorious and fearless saviour of England.
A saviour? We haven't had one of those yet, thank God.
I suppose he is still on his way.
As I was saying, we are expecting a new doctor.
Forgive me, ma'am, I'm very busy right now.
Please warn me about it later.
He said "Lancelot"? Why Lancelot?
Are we in the Middle Ages already?
That seems probable.
Patrick, please don't be angry with me.
When one lives as long as I do, time seems to compress,
the years begin to overlap, and sometimes
I simply can't understand what century we are in.
Where are we now?
Do you see that oak tree, sir? That huge oak over there?
Go talk to it.
It will be wonderful company for you.
It, too, must be about 500 years old.
500 years old? Already?
Patrick, I remember when it was still an acorn.
Didn't you hear me?!
But Patrick, it's true, I remember when it was an acorn!
- I'm Dr Simpson-
- I have no patience left to deal with you, scumbag.
Pardon, what did you say?
- Dr Simpson.
- Please come in, doctor, we've been eagerly expecting you.
I don't understand anything.
We were wondering when you'd get here.
- What's going on here?
- A madhouse, sir, as you can see. An ordinary madhouse.
I don't think so.
I'm well acquainted with the subject in question.
This is different.
These people don't look like asylum patients.
I have suspected the very same thing.
Crooks and vagabonds.
Why do you let them in?
It's the dean's order.
When he died for the first time and his will was announced,
his house and all of his property was to be used
to benefit the insane.
Sir, can you imagine what ensued?
Freeloaders from the whole of Ireland came flooding in.
- Giants, horses.
- Who?
- Houyhnhnms, whole families of them, can you imagine?
- And worst of all, the liliputians.
- Who?
The house is crawling with liliputians this big.
See? There he goes.
We walk like herons in a swamp.
God forbid, what if we step on one?
And butlers have feelings too.
Calm down, I will bring this place to order.
How old are you?
Thirty. What does it matter?
The last doctor was thirty as well.
But he was seventy when he left.
And only worked a week.
Shall I announce your arrival?
If I may... I was hoping to observe first...
Bravo, sir. We needed a man like you.
Please, Your Reverence.
Your tea.
The doctor has not arrived yet?
He did arrive, Ms Vanessa.
I wanted to announce him but the doctor forbade it.
He said he wants to look around first.
What does this mean, Patrick?
You are obligated to follow my orders.
I explained that to the doctor. But he informed me that
when the doctor is here, the nurse's orders no longer apply.
Is that so?
How interesting.
Patrick, did you think the doctor
had the face of a fool?
I would not say so.
He looks foolish and arrogant, at least
that's what everyone who saw him says.
And the dean thinks so too.
Isn't that so, Your Reverence?
Yes, I agree with you entirely.
Though if he was approved by the Board of Trustees,
we can't expect much from him.
Isn't that so, sir dean?
Yes, a very astute observation.
If I may be so bold, sir dean, the new
doctor made a good impression on me.
An open and confident look, a determined face,
hopefully acute hearing as well.
- May I go?
- You may.
If you have no objection, sir, I will begin.
Thank you.
Today's mail mostly consists of responses
to your latest passing.
The newspapers confirm that your departure this year
is having an especially turbulent effect.
Yes, gentlemen, I accuse Jonathan Swift of
offenses against religion, politics, laws and morals -
that is, all the values most central to the British Kingdom.
I mean, first and foremost, his notorious "Gulliver's Travels".
Your Reverence, the game has gone too far.
You turned your house into a circus.
These pagan carnival processions
are undermining your good name.
- Mommy, give me that book.
- No, my boy, don't touch it.
It's a horrible book, written by a horrible man
in a horrible time.
There have been riots in Dublin.
In this regard, deputy Ornerry addressed the Parliament thus:
"How long will dean Swift make a mockery of Britain?"
He even proposed a bill forbidding you to die.
The bill was rejected.
The representative of the Opposition stated:
"England is a democratic nation. If one can't live freely
here, at least one is free to die whenever one pleases."
Jonathan Swift is a monster that will doom Ireland,
and all of England along with it.
Why, I wonder, is such a man not dead yet?
He has been rehearsing his death for five years,
yet never works up the courage to take the final step.
In this house you can't believe anything.
It's all lies.
There's no such thing as lilliputians!
There's no such thing as giants!
There's only people of average size.
"He never thought an honour done him,
Because a duke was proud to own him,
Despised the fools with stars and garters,
So often seen caressing Chartres."
What is this, did he write it about himself?
Who is this man? Who is he? Who?
A glum misanthrope, consumed by his boundless pride.
Envious and intolerant to people's imperfections.
A stone-hearted egotist who destroyed the two
women who loved him.
Incapable of love.
Unable to love even himself and his fame.
...consumed by boundless pride...
...I accuse Jonathan Swift of offenses
against religion, politics, laws, morals...
A letter from France.
One of your fans sends you Voltaire's response to your pamphlet.
"The great irony of the great satirist.
To him, satire was not a genre, but the only way
to have an earnest conversation with this world."
What is your opinion, sir?
I think that's shrewd and accurate.
Why do you cover your face? Why do you hide your eyes?
What kind of ludicrous performance is this?
Poor Ireland, you confess to a comedian!
Why do you cover your face? Why do you hide your eyes?
What kind of ludicrous performance is this?
Conscience is not clean!
Your conscience is not clean!
Rising to the heavens - that's the work.
Rising to the heavens - that's the true toil.
A message from Manchester:
Astronomers observed a strange oval object in the sky,
resembling a floating island.
The newspapers presume it is on its way to visit you, sir.
What foolishness!
There is so much ignorance and barbarism all around.
Today someone broke another window with a stone.
Ms Johnson, be so kind as to go to the garden.
Good day, sister.
I'm very glad to see you.
So am I. Please go to the garden.
The dean will visit you there later.
I brought him flowers.
Very kind of you, but there's more than
enough flowers in the house.
These are wildflowers.
The dean loved wildflowers best of all.
You are distracting the dean, dear Esther.
You're not letting him have his tea in peace.
How many times must I say it?
Let go of the curtains.
You will rip them, Ms Johnson.
It's alright, sister.
I will sew new ones for you, blue with polka dots.
They will cheer you up when you look at them.
I know your vulgar tastes, my dear,
I pity you, but there's nothing I can do to help.
Go to the garden, or I will call the servants
and they will take you there by force.
What is it, dean?
I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt this woman.
You know we have nothing but sympathy towards each other.
Esther, can you confirm-
You are pale.
Agitation is bad for you.
Please, calm yourself.
That's not Stella.
I told you before - it's one of your hysterical fans.
Stella died many years ago, you know that.
This woman does not look like Stella.
And even if she does, what of it?
In fact, I could never understand
how you could like a woman who looked like that.
You have good taste, you- you are a great English writer.
How could you forget that?
Oh, forgive me, sir-
I- I'm horrible.
I'm tactless.
I- don't know what I'm saying.
Patrick! He doesn't want to see me!
Patrick, he is refusing to see me again!
Shoo! Shoo! Accursed things.
Darting around all day long.
The scoundrels! Just you wait,
you haven't got long, you know!
(indistinct)
Indulging your sweet tooth?
Who's there?
Is that you, Relb?
That sounds like a joke.
There's only two lilliputians in the house.
They meet on the table and one asks the other:
"Is that you?"
I'm asking, is that you, Relb?
Why did you climb up there, Flim?
- I was thirsty.
- U-huh.
I saw the unfinished tea on the table,
and I wanted to drink it.
- And what's that on your belt?
- A flask.
A flask...
What for?
Why are you interrogating me?
Because you're lying and don't want to tell the truth.
You never meant to drink the tea, Flim.
You wanted to bring it for Betty.
What of it?
You lied, Flim.
Another man is having tea with my wife,
and when I catch them red-handed,
they tell me: "what of it?"
She's unwell, she needs lemon tea.
You weren't there.
Even more so. Another man should not have tea
with a woman when her husband is not home.
Did she call you?
Yes.
What do you mean?
She was moaning.
That's different, Flim!
When you call, it's for someone, for a specific person.
And when you moan, it's in general, to no one!
Fine, let's move the sugar.
Look at them, building kitchenware that tall...
Come on, help me out!
Move over a bit.
And, lift.
These damn English!
Think of the number of normal people you could
feed with a chunk of sugar this big.
Or the amount of candy you could make,
lollipops for the girls...
Or those... do you remember,
back home they used to make them,
those brown-coloured ones, so good.
- Stretchies.
- Yeah. They don't make them here.
No, don't get me wrong.
Their country is advanced, prosperous.
Can't argue with that.
It's an advanced country.
The roads are straight.
And the houses, the cabs...
- What's that?
- The carriages.
Listen... Did you ever think about going back?
No.
Who knows, maybe the king forgave you by now.
I said "no"!
And besides, what do you mean, "forgave"?
It's ME who hasn't forgiven HIM!
And that's why I'm not going back!
The past is done with!
And now I live here!
I'm an Englishman!
And I like it here!
Why are you laughing?
I'm not laughing.
I'm an Englishman!
Yes, of course. No need to yell.
And I like it here very much!
Yes, alright, you're an Englishman.
Yes, an Englishman.
Listen to you talk! HIM forgiving ME!
Alright, I'm sorry.
Maybe he did forgive me.
And why aren't you returning, Flim?
I have an idea how to get the tea.
One of us needs to stand on the other's shoulders.
I can stand on the bottom, since I'm taller.
You? Taller? You taller than me?
Stop that, I've always been taller than you.
Remember, in the army? And at the balls?
I was always in the first rows.
- Many years have passed.
- Alright, let's check.
OK, but it's hard to do without an arbiter.
Let's go ask Betty.
Why bring Betty into it?
What kind of shoes are you wearing?
Same kind as yours.
We've checked numerous times,
and every time you're looking for some excuse.
Fine, fine, fine.
I'll stand on the bottom, because I'm stronger.
If you like. But keep in mind I'll be forced to walk over you.
It's not like I expect anything better of you,
you wretched lilliput.
- Me? A lilliput?
- A lilliput.
- I'm the lilliput?
- So you are.
And who's calling me that? Who? Huh?
Also a lilliput.
- You fool. What a fool you are.
- I'm a lilliput, I'm a lilliput too.
I was wondering when you'll regain your sense of humour.
Your wonderful sense of humour.
Alright, that's enough. Let's climb.
- Are you sure you won't drop me?
- I don't know, we'll see.
Let's go.
Onwards! Keep going!
Wow...
What a view!
Well?
What's up there?
The owner drank half the cup.
And?
So what?
What now?
We'll think of something.
Be careful up there.
If you fall, I'll get the blame.
Don't worry about me, Relb.
What a view!
It's an unforgettable sight, Relb.
When Betty is well again,
we'll need to climb up together,
up on the cupboard.
This view is really something!
You know, you can see the cupboard corner.
Enough talking already. Get down.
Hold on, the flask is still filling.
Flim!
- Can I ask you a question?
- Well?
Do you really like my wife?
Why aren't you answering?
I'm trying to think of a good answer.
If I say "yes, very much", you'll be jelous.
If I say "not really", Betty will be hurt.
I'll be leaving you soon, Relb.
Where will you go?
I'll move to another town.
What for?
We've got to end this, haven't we?
We're only causing each other grief,
traveling together like this.
I'll leave.
You'll perish alone.
I'll think of something to do.
I'm a pianist after all, Relb.
And not a bad one, either.
Don't talk nonsense.
Have you seen the local musical instruments?
Every key is the size of a log.
How do you intend to play?
With my feet, Relb.
I already figured it out.
If I jump fast enough from key to key,
the melody comes out pretty good.
I already rehearsed.
I mean, you can't play any complex pieces,
but the popular jingles come out pretty decent.
Stop that! You're a good musician,
you shouldn't degrade your art by playing primitive jingles.
Who here knows I'm a good musician?
I know it.
And Betty.
That's why I want to get away from you.
Come on, don't talk nonsense!
It's demeaning to jump from key to key
like a flea!
You're a human being!
You shouldn't lose your dignity.
Besides, you're my friend.
And you like my wife.
And most importantly, we're from over there.
Three normal people in this enormous,
god-forsaken country.
We've got to stick together.
And you can't abandon us, Flim.
Yes, alright, Relb.
I was just daydreaming.
And you should come over,
even when no one calls you.
When we don't call you - you should come anyway.
Thank you.
I dropped my shoe.
One second.
What's that in your shoe?
I'm asking, what's in your shoe?
Give it a rest, what's it to you?
You son of a bitch!
The insoles.
You've got lifted insoles and hidden heels.
Betty!
Stop yelling, you fool.
What's the matter?
So there's insoles, so what?
Betty!
Come here!
Here, look at this!
He's got hidden heels!
He's got hidden heels! He's a scumbag!
He's a liar!
Silence! I won't have this in front of Betty!
Scumbag! Thrice-damned scumbag!
And Betty should know!
I always checked our height honestly.
- Betty, I was always honest, and he, the reprobate!
- Stop it!
In all our disputes he won by trickery!
And back in the army. And at court.
And before you! Before you, Betty, do you hear?
Enough now, come on.
You are no longer my friend, Flim.
You deceived me.
You deceived my wife.
She's a trusting woman!
I saw the admiration in her eyes when she looked at you.
- You looked at him, didn't you? Didn't you?
- Yes.
She admits it! Did you hear?
She admits it!
She would say to me:
"Look, Relb, Flim grows taller every day!"
If she only knew! Oh, if she only knew.
I did know.
Yes, she did know!
She knew because she saw me with no shoes on!
What?
She saw! Do you understand?
She saw!
With no shoes on?
You mean with nothing on?
- Is that true?
- Yes.
It's true.
Leave her alone, you truth-seeker!
If you love truth so much, listen to this:
me and Betty have loved each other for a long time!
And I enter your room because she calls me!
- Shut up.
- She calls me! Yes, she calls me, you understand?
- I'll kill you, Flim.
- I was always above you.
And I'm not talking about the heels.
I always reached greater heights.
Even now, I stand on the very edge of the glass.
Under me, the abyss of the unfinished tea,
and I don't care!
Come join me up here, Betty!
- No, no...
- I'll show you the moon's reflection in the inkpot!
- I'll get you, Flim.
- You won't reach me, you wretched lilliput!
Lilliput! Lilliput!..
Help!
Help!
Flim!
- Help him! He can't swim!
- Try to swim, Flim!
- You can't abandon us, Flim!
- Please!
- Try to get out!
- Flim! Somebody!
- Please!
- Save him! Somebody!
I had a sad dream
in the midnight darkness.
All I remember
is that in the dream we parted forever.
And I cried in my sleep,
And I was very frightened
when I awoke at dawn.
And yet it is even more frightening
When you have no dreams at all,
No dreams at all...
Let's get the case history.
Full name.
Full name.
Can you tell me your name, sir?
I repeat.
Your full name.
Jonathan Swift.
With an "F"?
- What?
- I'm asking, is "Swift" spelled with an "F"?
Yes, doctor, obviously.
- Year of birth?
- 1667.
Occupation?
Clergyman, philosopher, writer.
Writer?
So our dean also writes?
Interesting.
- Are you joking, sir?
- I never joke, especially not during work.
You have not read Mr Swift's books?
I don't read fiction.
I barely have enough time for professional literature.
And you have not heard about his pamphlets,
or his famous "Gulliver's Travels"?
Why... of course I have....
It's about that fat one, who eats a lot?
That's "Gargantua", sir. By Rabelais.
- "Gulliver" is entirely different.
- In that case I don't recall.
Forgive me, Mr Simpson, but I don't think you can help Mr Swift.
To treat an artist without knowing his creations?
I'll be forced to write to the Board of Trustees
and request another doctor.
Yes, write the request, nurse.
That's within your rights.
But I fear the Board of Trustees will
find it easier to replace the nurse.
Oh yes, I remember!
Gulliver, that's a children's book.
The book was written for adults, sir.
I remember now. It's about a doctor who went to the
land of the lilliputians, and... some other such place.
Not "someplace". Laputa, Balnibarbi, Luggnagg,
Glubbdubdrib, and finally the country of the Houyhnhnms.
These are all very serious matters, sir.
I see no sense in presenting a vulgar and crude summary.
It will serve you much better to read it.
Now the dean is tired, he finds this discussion unpleasant.
Please.
Doctor, please don't be angry at Vanessa.
She is ill-mannered, but she loves the dean.
And does that gladden or upset you?
That doesn't matter.
Vanessa helps Mr Swift in his work.
She handles his correspondence.
So you are defending her?
I have to be forgiving toward her.
She lost her head.
Was it you singing by the window?
Many years ago, the dean knew a woman named Vanessa.
He even dedicated a poem to her.
Vanessa mistakenly thought that she is
the same woman he wrote about.
It's a beautiful poem.
But how can you trust poetry?
When the dean was on a roll, he could write
poems even to a broomstick.
No, doctor.
He loved another woman all his life.
He wrote letters to her.
And what letters...
Over a thousand of them remain.
Well then!
I hope she did not bear YOUR name?
He called her Stella.
That was also a name he made up.
Our dean had quite the imagination.
So who was this dean of yours married to?
He was not married at all.
There were two women in his life, but his sense of honour
did not allow him to wound either of them.
So did they both die?
Yes.
At the same time?
Why did you think that?
Because otherwise he could marry the surviving one.
Excuse me, sir, are you from Nottinghamshire?
Yes. Why?
I thought so.
So did they die or didn't they?
I'm asking you!
Mark my words, sir...
...in this house everyone dies and no one dies.
The damned lilliputians!
- You can't take a step without... and the flying island...
- That's enough!- enough with the lilliputians!- enough!
What lilliputians? What flying islands?
Or did you dream them up in a nightmare?
- And you?
- What about me?
Did you also dream them up?
Two of them, by the glass of tea?
One's a pianist, the other's married.
The one with the insoles is taller. Right?
- The taller one is the one WITHOUT insoles.
- See?
See what nightmare we're living?
Everyone dreams the same dreams here!
It's all because of that dean Swift.
It's his bad influence.
How can it be his influence? He doesn't speak a word!
That's right.
He preaches silently.
Even at the pulpit. You know? He'll stand there
in front of the congregation and be silent.
And they're silent too.
Then he'll go like this,
and that's it, suddenly the Irish dislike the governor,
they are unnerved by poverty and don't want to go hungry.
I think your dean is just trying
to pull wool over everyone's eyes.
I agree with you entirely.
He's like Hamlet.
Remember, he played the flute and everything seemed fine,
then one day he got over-agitated and cut everyone
to pieces, including Guildenstern and Rosencrantz.
- What is it?
- Don't forget Polonius.
I don't feel sorry for Polonius.
But the other two suffered for no good reason.
Pardon... I didn't understand.
Who were you talking about?
Didn't you read Sheakspeare?
- I only read professional literature, you see...
- You are a great man, sir, untarnished by culture!
You'll bring this place to order.
Do you hear that?
A perfect example of his bad influence.
You know what that is? The insane giant Gluum
wants to have a death battle with the knight Lancelot.
What I want to know is, why does he need it,
and WHERE I'm supposed to get him a Lancelot.
Would you like a look?
Yes.
He's tall like this.
Let's go.
- Lancelot! Lancelot!
- Quiet down now! Calm down!
- Quiet!
- Lancelot!
Who is that man on stilts?
So you think?..
You mean those are just stilts?!
Sir, you are absolutely correct, he's on stilts.
Of course you'll say you didn't know that.
I did. I knew it. I sensed, I suspected it.
But to tell with such certainty at a single glance - brilliant!
Tell that bloke on stilts
that sir Lancelot has arrived and wishes to fight him.
Right!
Now we'll see what kind of giant he is.
Now we'll see!
- Take a weapon and armour.
- There's no need.
Yes, there is!
May I sound the signal?
That's not necessary.
Yes, it is!
Everything has to be like in a real tourney!
Long live the traditions
of not-so-long-bygone days!
The knights go into battle with swords drawn.
The heralds sound the trumpets.
It is time to start.
Let's see how well heroes can die!
Onwards, mylords!
Onwards with no fear!
Pierce the armour with a powerful strike!
A sword across the throat, a spear into the belly!
Let me introduce you.
Sir Lancelot.
And this is Gluum.
Gluum the Giant.
Sir Lancelot, I'm glad you accepted my challenge,
very glad.
I hope the battle will be fair and merciless.
I don't like foolish jokes.
I came here to fight a giant,
and you're a man of less than average height,
Five feet at most.
Five foot seven.
But I really am a giant.
It might be hard to believe, but it's true.
It's just that I've sunk low.
How did it happen?
- I could tell you...
- But make it brief.
Certainly.
A glass of wine, if I may.
Yes. And don't let anyone in.
How long have you been drinking?
It's my medication.
Medication...
Sir, I can tell you the whole story.
- I really am a giant, though nowadays
it might be hard to believe.
- Excuse me!
Not so with my father.
Gluum Senior. He was 200 feet tall.
He was taller than the Dublin Cathedral.
And that, as it turns out, was blasphemy.
The local bishop demanded that father should
always walk bent over.
So the poor man stooped all his life,
as though he had radiculitis.
He was from Brobdingnag.
The land of the giants,
which dean Swift described so well.
You've read about it, I hope?
What's the matter?
Don't get distracted, sir.
I'm listening. Go on.
My father ended up in England after a shipwreck.
He did not live long here. He suffered greatly
from the mismatch between his size and the local standards.
Where is Patrick, damn it?
How long does it take to get a glass of wine?
Quiet down, quiet down, sir.
You are not in a pub.
You are here for a battle, so mind your manners.
- Alright, I'm sorry.
- Here you are.
Quiet, quiet, calm down.
They'll begin in a minute.
I said they'll begin in a minute!
See, they're warming up.
Sir, you are looking upon
the most unfortunate of all creatures.
And my misfortune lies in the fact that besides a
great height, I also inherited an enormous brain.
And so I started to develop rapidly.
Yes.
I started to speak when I was five days old.
And in several languages simultaneously.
Started reading, writing and counting while still in the crib.
Completed high school in three days,
college in one month.
In a year, exclusively through self-study, reached the
level of knowledge of a member of the British Academy.
All of that started to irritate my compatriots.
And that's when I started to grow.
Yes, I grew incredibly fast.
Foot by foot, I rose higher and higher
above my fellow countrymen.
Soon I had a bird's eye view of the earth.
Sir, I saw how beautiful it is.
The picturesque hills and mountains.
But I saw also how it was suffering.
The forests being burned.
The people killing each other over a plot of land.
Unfortunately, with giants everything is over the top -
eyesight, hearing, moral sense...
Every gunshot echoed in my ears.
Every death tore my heart to pieces.
And I decided to make my country happy.
I thought I could convince everyone to make peace,
I thought I knew the meaning of existence...
I went to the king.
And he wouldn't see me.
Sir, would you order the servant to bring another glass?
We are coming to the sad part.
- That's excessive.
- Do it, Patrick.
Go on.
- An interesing tourney indeed!
- Our king said, "isn't there anyone who will
teach this upstart a lesson?"
They declared war on me.
I could have killed all the king's knights
with one swipe of the hand.
But how could I do that to my fellow countrymen?
I realized: the stronger man has to yield.
I thought: "Let me die, if that will serve my country."
The knights turned out to be useless.
Their horses threw them, their arrows missed the mark.
Their lances could not even pierce my breeches.
The king agreed to meet me and said: "Don't make
a fool of yourself. Shrink down, make yourself lower."
"Be like everyone else."
This is the last one, sir.
That's it, don't ask for any more.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
And so, I started to shrink.
Don't ask me, sir, how I did it, you won't need it.
There's a set of special exercises -
bowing in different ways, squatting down...
Gradually I descended,
every day coming closer to the level of my compatriots.
Shrinking my brain was more difficult.
But alcohol helped.
Taking alcohol three times a day clears your head
of excess knowledge and unnecessary thoughts.
In the first year I struggled to forget
everything I learned since the academy.
Then it became easier.
It took me a month to forget college.
A week to forget high school.
Philosophy took me a day or maybe three, I don't recall.
History took a day.
The, what do you call it,..
Whatever it is, I forgot it without effort in two hours.
Then suddenly dean Swift began to ring the church bells,
gather the insane, everyone together... And I, you know...
wanted to come, like everyone... with the people...
you know... like that, as they say...
the people, the laughter...
But then this thought came into my head:
"Why not return to the good old days, Gluum?"
"Why not rise up there again, right to the clouds?"
I felt the urge to do something for my country.
I can't be successful as a giant in life -
but maybe in death?
And that's why I sent you the challenge.
I'm very grateful that you responded.
I heard that you are a brave and fearless knight,
and you won't refuse to battle me.
Unfortunately, that is impossible.
- Why?
- Well, firstly, I don't feel any enmity towards you.
And second, I don't approve of duels.
It- it's not a duel. It's a tourney.
It's about the triumph of courage, of skill.
No, sir Lancelot.
See, the people are waiting for heroic deeds.
It's been too long since the people saw brave fighters.
We need heroes.
Hey, hey now! Stop!
I'm not Lancelot. I'm a doctor.
Dr Simpson. I want to help you.
Patrick!
I don't like foolish jokes!
You could say that I'm insane, that you're a doctor...
...but I'll get on my stilts, you'll take up a sword,
and the giant will meet Lancelot in battle!
- Quiet, calm down...
- Get away from me!
You coward! You brag in pubs about past victories, and
when the hour comes to test your strength, you hide!
Oh England, you have no heroes left!
Let's go, let's go.
Hey! Why'd you do that!
If your hand forgot how to hold a sword,
at least mine won't hesitate!
Doctor! We need to catch him.
- You won't even have to mar your hands.
- Easy now!..
- No, stop!
- All you need to do is take the credit!
All hail brave Lancelot!
Doctor! Doctor!
It was an accident. Not your fault! By no means.
Quick, wash the blood off.
Destroy the evidence. Quickly now.
Why destroy the evidence?
Huh, my friend?
It's not blood.
It's cranberry juice.
Get up, Mr Gluum. Do you hear me?
Get up, get up!
It's not blood!
It's cranberry juice!
What's going on, sir judge?
What is the meaning of this?
By what rights? This is a private residence!
Beg pardon, ma'am, but when a private residence is
invaded by crooks, sooner or later law must follow.
This is cruel.
Doctor, how can you allow our patients-
They are actors.
Only traveling actors.
And they will be punished according to law.
They turned this house into a circus.
Do you see, honoured dean, how these people
exploited your benevolent will?
You thought to ease the suffering of the unfortunate,
and instead sheltered charlatans.
This is the scoundrel who tricked you.
Here he is.
Forgive me, sir, I never thought it would turn out
this way. I only wanted what's best.
It's all because of the will.
When sir Swift made it, I thought - what will happen...
...if our house really becomes filled with the insane?
I'm a butler, not a saint. Butlers have feelings too.
- Scumbag.
- And that's when this traveling troup showed up in Dublin.
I came to them and said:
gentlemen, I have a good job offer for you.
You live in dean Swift's house, we provide you
food and drink, and in exchange you clown around.
I mean, sir, that they were to play various
funny people that His Reverence invented.
- What vileness.
- Vileness? Not at all! The dean always loved pranks.
At first everything went well.
It was amusing.
One would pretend to be a lilliput, another a giant...
All good fun.
But then these scoundrels got carried away.
Started to drown each other.
Bloodshed started.
They got the whole town in an uproar.
Riots started in the streets, it spread like an epidemic.
- What will happen to these people?
- Prison, ma'am. That's the best place for them.
Art like theirs needs to be protected and kept under guard.
Don't be lenient with them, sir. They're actors.
Deception is their trade. Each is a Hamlet at heart.
Everything that happens in the house is responsibility
of the administrator. Patrick was only following my orders.
There! I was waiting for that confession, ma'am.
A half-literate servant couldn't come up with
such an elaborate scheme on his own.
It was not a scheme. I was carrying out the dean's will.
You are fired, Ms Vanessa.
The Board of Trustees frees you of all your duties.
Be so kind as to give the keys to the new nurse.
Ms Esther Johnson.
Now she will be managing the household.
The doctor and I are already acquainted.
Though he took me for a madwoman.
- Only for an actress.
- I, at least, never had any doubts as to who you are.
You have too little talent for an actress,
and too little sincerity for a madwoman.
But I'm glad the Board chose you. I hope the time
you spent eavesdropping has done you good.
Do you have any requests for me?
Of course. Don't hang up curtains with flowers.
The dean will not stop you, but it will pain him.
He can't stand banality.
Very well, sister, I will remember your request.
But I will get rid of these curtains for certain.
As well as these suits of armour, the pistols,
and the masks too.
Patrick, why are you not writing that down?
- How?
- That does not concern me.
All I need is for you to follow my orders exactly.
Take off his handcuffs.
The scoundrel, using any excuse not to work!
- Start writing, Patrick.
- I'm writing.
- Move the desk to the cabinet, the cabinet to the fireplace.
- To the fireplace...
- But the fireplace is over there.
- Then we will move it here.
- The fireplace?
- Yes.
Get rid of these curtains immediately.
I want the dean to see his actors.
The actors are about to be taken away.
No, sir judge. Didn't you hear the dean's request?
He is asking you not to take them away today.
He wants to say goodbye.
Let them stay till morning.
The wake is not yet over.
Alright - on your responsibility.
And no performances! Keep the actors under guard.
That's it.
Where is that fine line,
Imperceptible to the eye,
Where the mind so easily
Slips beyond sanity?
The heart bursts, and out spills-
is that blood or berry juice?
Believe me, it makes no difference.
Either way, our hearts are pierced
by a violent pain -
maybe anger, maybe love.
Dolls can cry real tears,
words can burn like fire,
The drum explodes, the audience gives an ovation,
And to the sound of applause
new decorations are being put up -
A new farce is about to begin.
Listen closely, sir.
In this house every sound is the start of a melody.
And every seed here must take root.
Stop that singing!
Let them be, they're not being loud.
Stop, that's enough!
No performances allowed. That goes for all of you.
And don't crowd in the front.
You're right. But it's kind of a shame.
I saw some of their stuff, I liked it.
Especially about the lilliputians.
- When one of them drowned in the glass?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, it was pretty dramatic.
- And the one about the giant wasn't bad.
And especially with that bloke - hilarious!
The one who lives forever.
Which one is that?
The one who forgot himself. He's like: the oak is
500 years old, and I remember when it was an acorn.
There he is.
Hey! You, come here!
- What are you doing, leave 'em be.
- Come on, just a chat.
Let's see you!
There you are.
Did you want me, gentlemen?
Look at how he's dressed - hilarious!
What's your name?
I'm asking you, what's your name?
You see... I've lived on Earth such a long time... that I
forgot my name, so please, just call me Someone.
"Someone". Hear that?
So how long DID you live, "Someone"?
A few thousand years.
A few thousand, he says! Hilarious!
There is no reason to laugh, gentlemen.
Every person lives on Earth for a few thousand years.
Sometimes more.
But you've lost your memory.
By the way, I remember meeting you before, sir.
About fifty years ago, I think.
Fifty? Liar!
I'm only thirty-five.
That's in this life.
We've met in your other life, your previous one.
I recall it vividly.
You were standing at your post in Market Square,
by the city jail.
- But that's where he's posted now!
- This is now, and that was then. During George I's reign.
- Wha?
- I'm sure it was you. I noted your red mustache and freckles.
You can recall it yourself, if you just try a little.
Well well, and how do I do that?
Close your eyes. Concentrate.
I'll help you. We'll try this together.
OK, let's try.
Well?
Now calmly, without rush,
try to look over the whole life you've lived.
- Well?
- And now try to recall yourself at thirty years old.
- Do you remember?
- Yeah.
- And at twenty?
- Yeah. That's when I married Polly.
- Wonderful. And now - at ten. Do you remember?
- We lived near Glasgow, in a little village...
Stay focused. We are coming to the most important part.
You are five... Do you remember?
- Vaguely.
- Now you are four... three... two... one...
Now you're in the womb.
- Where?
- In the womb.
You lie there, curled in the fetal position.
Your mother's blood flows through you.
Try to remember. Come on, just try!
And now you pass from this life - into the previous one.
And there you are, in your uniform and helmet,
standing in the Market Square of Dublin, by the city jail.
The carriages drive by you, the pigeons fly overhead,
and you stand there and stare at them.
I remember.
Listen, I remember!
- You're lying.
- I swear it! There I am, in Market Square!
- But that's where you're posted now!
- This is now. And that was then!
Good Lord and Virgin Mary, I always had the feeling
that I lived before!
All people lived before.
You just need to learn to remember it.
Dean Swift preached as much.
- Alright, quiet now, enough. Let's go, Jack.
- There I am, in Market Square!
Yeah yeah, in Market Square, calm down! Let's go.
Sir dean, your vow of silence is getting old.
You must put a stop to this.
Sir Someone... are you asleep?
It's OK, get some rest.
I mean, pardon me for disturbing you...
But I was wondering if I could go a little deeper.
How do you mean?
To remember my past life. So, uh... We got to the point
where I stand by the jail in Market Square, right?
- That's during King George's reign?
- Yes.
- Try to remember more.
- Here I am at 30, at 20, I get married to Polly...
- And in your past life you were also married to Polly?
- Looks like it.
That other Polly was a little younger though,
cooked better... didn't take all my money...
In short, she was a little more like Kathy,
you know, this other girlie.
I met her on a trip to Manchester, we visited relatives...
Don't get distracted. Focus and try to remember.
You're twenty, and you are marrying Polly who is like Kathy.
Then you're ten... then five...
Four... three... two... one...
Now you're in the womb...
Now go back. Back, just a little more!
And you're in your pre-previous life.
- That would be during King Edward?
- Yes.
- Got it.
- I remember.
- What?
I'm posted by the jail in Market Square.
Maybe you're getting mixed up?
- I'm standing by the jail. On guard duty.
- I feared as much.
Hold on, what do you mean, sir?
No sense trying to remembering more, Jack.
I'm afraid you will only get more of the same.
The times will change, and you'll still be standing
at your post in Market Square.
- Why?
- I guess... that's your fate, Jack.
But... but that's such a shame, sir.
Well, what can you do?
That... is such a shame, sir.
I mean, I suspected that I've never been a... you know,
any great lord... or a dean like your Swift...
But like this?
What did I do to deserve it?
I stand there, year after year, and nothing changes.
Excuse me, sir, but I must stop you.
Conversations like this are dangerous.
I'm afraid this might end badly.
Something's not right here!
I... need to... change something.
Hey! Jack, what are you doing?
Do not come closer!
I, a man named Jack Smith, consider these people innocent,
and I give them freedom!
What are you doing? Have you gone mad?!
Don't come closer!
I'm setting these people free.
They may go, they have not done anyone harm.
You will be punished, idiot!
- I don't care!
- Jack, you'll go on trial! Think what you're doing!
Think what YOU're doing!
Stop! Don't do this, Jack!
Jack, stop!
Forgive me, but this was my duty.
Duty!
Alert!
Get out, all of you, quick!
There, that's it. That's it, sir.
See how easy it is?
Now... everything will be different for me... right?
Yes. Now everything will be different.
Now a new leaf has been turned.
A new leaf has been turned.
Well, I don't want a completely new one.
Let Polly still be there. And Kathy.
Yes. Yes, of course.
Let them still be there.
But the ending... let the ending be different.
The ending will be different.
But this is blood.
This is blood!
But it's real blood!
Cast:
Swift - Oleg Yankovskiy
Dr Simpson - Aleksandr Abdulov
Patrick - Vladimir Belousov
Gluum - Evgeniy Leonov
Vanessa - Marina Ignatova
Esther - Aleksandra Zakharova
Someone - Aleksandr Sirin
Relb - Aleksandr Zbruev
Flim - Nikolay Karachentsov
Betty - Tatyana Rudina
Jack - Viktor Proskurin
(and others...)
Screenplay by Grigori Gorin
Directed by Mark Zakharov
(and others...)
(Translated for you by Naireth)
End of Part 1
Silence in the studio, attention.
Swift!
Let's have the portrait.
- Maybe another picture?
- Why? It looks like him.
- But it shouldn't look like him.
We don't need an accurate depiction,
we're not making a biography.
Music!
Now this is much better.
You think he looks more like Swift now?
Yes, he had quite the imagination and loved to clown around.
Get rid of the eyes, that's enough.
Right.
Zoom in, show the carriage.
The doctor exits.
He's looking around.
He's riding on.
He's having breakfast and looking around.
Looking around.
He's never been here before.
Prepare for Dublin.
Bells!
Hey, gentlemen!
Tell me what happened. Who died?
Swift died.
- Who?
- The dean of St Patrick's Cathedral.
What a pity.
When did this happen?
Today.
At five o'clock, as usual.
What do you mean, "as usual"?
You know, as usual.
Do you know what you're saying, dolt?
Sir, you must be from far away,
you don't know our dean.
He is a very punctual man,
organized and neat in all he does,
and when he passes to the next world,
he does it precisely at five.
So he's alive?
Who?
Swift.
How can he be alive
if we just told you he died?
The newspapers already published the news
and the bell has been tolling for an hour.
Here he comes.
Who?
Swift.
Ask him if you don't believe us.
Is he blind?
Not at all, sir.
The dean's vision is excellent.
But he often sees everything inside out.
That's why he wears a mask -
to avoid disturbing others with the look in his eyes.
Excuse me, sir.
I'm Dr Simpson. I've been sent to you from London
by request from the Board of Trustees.
And now these people tell me
that you have, pardon me, died.
Very amusing!
But if you will allow me to say so, this is nonsense.
Just a flight of fancy, which I will attempt to cure.
I'm a doctor,
Here's a letter confirming my appointment.
Who are you?
Us?
We're Mr Swift's guests.
We have been kindly invited into his home
to keep him company at his own wake.
So you're all freeloaders?
Of course, sir! Aren't you one as well?
When there isn't enough wine on the table,
Let the downpour fall!
When there is too much intelligence in your head,
Let the downpour fall!
As soon as all your thoughts and dreams
drown in the rainwater,
You will feel such joy!
Don't think about anything,
Don't think, don't think, don't think!
Let the downpour fall!
Let the wind howl!
Let the downpour fall!
Let it fall in a torrent!
Forget and don't think about your death.
Let the downpour fall!
The shorter your weekdays,
the longer your holiday.
Let the downpour fall!
Who knows what will happen
when the appointed hour comes,
And what the last threshold will be like,
And whether any reward awaits beyond it -
Don't think about it!
Don't think, don't think, don't think!
Let the downpour fall!
Let the wind howl!
Let the downpour fall!
Let it fall in a torrent!
Let the downpour fall!
Let the wind howl!
THE HOUSE THAT SWIFT BUILT
This is the fourth one this week.
Shall I throw it out or preserve it as a historical monument?
Preserve it.
What do you think, Patrick,
who could have done this?
One of the guests.
Are there many guests today?
As usual, ma'am.
Who is here?
The giant. The people from the floating island.
The what do you call them, the horses.
The Houyhnhnms.
I've told you before, Patrick, they are Houyhnhnms.
Forgive me, ma'am, the Houy-
And that gentleman who lives forever.
Mr Someone.
Him.
And the lilliputians.
The lilliputians are darting around the house
all the time. All the time.
They're always in the way.
Direct everyone to the garden.
I wish Mr Swift to have his tea in peace.
I keep telling them, but do you think they listen?
They peer in at the windows,
barge in at the doors,
And butlers have feelings too.
I keep that in mind when I pay your salary.
Good evening, Patrick.
Good evening sir. You were asked to go to the garden.
- Or is it still morning?
- Very possible. To the garden, please.
- In that case, good morning.
- Good morning! To the garden!
- And the date? What date is it?
- October 5th.
- And the year?
- You asked me that yesterday.
- And what year was it yesterday?
- The same one as today, 1745.
- Pardon, is that before Christ or after?
- Patrick, did you prepare the tea?
- No, ma'am.
Thus far I only prepared the cup.
Have I warned you that we expect a new doctor?
Not yet, ma'am.
- Lancelot! Lancelot!
- Well? Are we going to keep yelling all day?
- Lancelot!..
- Hello.
- Hello. What do you want?
I am Gluum the Giant.
I need Lancelot.
Everyone needs Lancelot.
Remind me, who is that?
A brave knight,
the glorious and fearless saviour of England.
A saviour? We haven't had one of those yet, thank God.
I suppose he is still on his way.
As I was saying, we are expecting a new doctor.
Forgive me, ma'am, I'm very busy right now.
Please warn me about it later.
He said "Lancelot"? Why Lancelot?
Are we in the Middle Ages already?
That seems probable.
Patrick, please don't be angry with me.
When one lives as long as I do, time seems to compress,
the years begin to overlap, and sometimes
I simply can't understand what century we are in.
Where are we now?
Do you see that oak tree, sir? That huge oak over there?
Go talk to it.
It will be wonderful company for you.
It, too, must be about 500 years old.
500 years old? Already?
Patrick, I remember when it was still an acorn.
Didn't you hear me?!
But Patrick, it's true, I remember when it was an acorn!
- I'm Dr Simpson-
- I have no patience left to deal with you, scumbag.
Pardon, what did you say?
- Dr Simpson.
- Please come in, doctor, we've been eagerly expecting you.
I don't understand anything.
We were wondering when you'd get here.
- What's going on here?
- A madhouse, sir, as you can see. An ordinary madhouse.
I don't think so.
I'm well acquainted with the subject in question.
This is different.
These people don't look like asylum patients.
I have suspected the very same thing.
Crooks and vagabonds.
Why do you let them in?
It's the dean's order.
When he died for the first time and his will was announced,
his house and all of his property was to be used
to benefit the insane.
Sir, can you imagine what ensued?
Freeloaders from the whole of Ireland came flooding in.
- Giants, horses.
- Who?
- Houyhnhnms, whole families of them, can you imagine?
- And worst of all, the liliputians.
- Who?
The house is crawling with liliputians this big.
See? There he goes.
We walk like herons in a swamp.
God forbid, what if we step on one?
And butlers have feelings too.
Calm down, I will bring this place to order.
How old are you?
Thirty. What does it matter?
The last doctor was thirty as well.
But he was seventy when he left.
And only worked a week.
Shall I announce your arrival?
If I may... I was hoping to observe first...
Bravo, sir. We needed a man like you.
Please, Your Reverence.
Your tea.
The doctor has not arrived yet?
He did arrive, Ms Vanessa.
I wanted to announce him but the doctor forbade it.
He said he wants to look around first.
What does this mean, Patrick?
You are obligated to follow my orders.
I explained that to the doctor. But he informed me that
when the doctor is here, the nurse's orders no longer apply.
Is that so?
How interesting.
Patrick, did you think the doctor
had the face of a fool?
I would not say so.
He looks foolish and arrogant, at least
that's what everyone who saw him says.
And the dean thinks so too.
Isn't that so, Your Reverence?
Yes, I agree with you entirely.
Though if he was approved by the Board of Trustees,
we can't expect much from him.
Isn't that so, sir dean?
Yes, a very astute observation.
If I may be so bold, sir dean, the new
doctor made a good impression on me.
An open and confident look, a determined face,
hopefully acute hearing as well.
- May I go?
- You may.
If you have no objection, sir, I will begin.
Thank you.
Today's mail mostly consists of responses
to your latest passing.
The newspapers confirm that your departure this year
is having an especially turbulent effect.
Yes, gentlemen, I accuse Jonathan Swift of
offenses against religion, politics, laws and morals -
that is, all the values most central to the British Kingdom.
I mean, first and foremost, his notorious "Gulliver's Travels".
Your Reverence, the game has gone too far.
You turned your house into a circus.
These pagan carnival processions
are undermining your good name.
- Mommy, give me that book.
- No, my boy, don't touch it.
It's a horrible book, written by a horrible man
in a horrible time.
There have been riots in Dublin.
In this regard, deputy Ornerry addressed the Parliament thus:
"How long will dean Swift make a mockery of Britain?"
He even proposed a bill forbidding you to die.
The bill was rejected.
The representative of the Opposition stated:
"England is a democratic nation. If one can't live freely
here, at least one is free to die whenever one pleases."
Jonathan Swift is a monster that will doom Ireland,
and all of England along with it.
Why, I wonder, is such a man not dead yet?
He has been rehearsing his death for five years,
yet never works up the courage to take the final step.
In this house you can't believe anything.
It's all lies.
There's no such thing as lilliputians!
There's no such thing as giants!
There's only people of average size.
"He never thought an honour done him,
Because a duke was proud to own him,
Despised the fools with stars and garters,
So often seen caressing Chartres."
What is this, did he write it about himself?
Who is this man? Who is he? Who?
A glum misanthrope, consumed by his boundless pride.
Envious and intolerant to people's imperfections.
A stone-hearted egotist who destroyed the two
women who loved him.
Incapable of love.
Unable to love even himself and his fame.
...consumed by boundless pride...
...I accuse Jonathan Swift of offenses
against religion, politics, laws, morals...
A letter from France.
One of your fans sends you Voltaire's response to your pamphlet.
"The great irony of the great satirist.
To him, satire was not a genre, but the only way
to have an earnest conversation with this world."
What is your opinion, sir?
I think that's shrewd and accurate.
Why do you cover your face? Why do you hide your eyes?
What kind of ludicrous performance is this?
Poor Ireland, you confess to a comedian!
Why do you cover your face? Why do you hide your eyes?
What kind of ludicrous performance is this?
Conscience is not clean!
Your conscience is not clean!
Rising to the heavens - that's the work.
Rising to the heavens - that's the true toil.
A message from Manchester:
Astronomers observed a strange oval object in the sky,
resembling a floating island.
The newspapers presume it is on its way to visit you, sir.
What foolishness!
There is so much ignorance and barbarism all around.
Today someone broke another window with a stone.
Ms Johnson, be so kind as to go to the garden.
Good day, sister.
I'm very glad to see you.
So am I. Please go to the garden.
The dean will visit you there later.
I brought him flowers.
Very kind of you, but there's more than
enough flowers in the house.
These are wildflowers.
The dean loved wildflowers best of all.
You are distracting the dean, dear Esther.
You're not letting him have his tea in peace.
How many times must I say it?
Let go of the curtains.
You will rip them, Ms Johnson.
It's alright, sister.
I will sew new ones for you, blue with polka dots.
They will cheer you up when you look at them.
I know your vulgar tastes, my dear,
I pity you, but there's nothing I can do to help.
Go to the garden, or I will call the servants
and they will take you there by force.
What is it, dean?
I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt this woman.
You know we have nothing but sympathy towards each other.
Esther, can you confirm-
You are pale.
Agitation is bad for you.
Please, calm yourself.
That's not Stella.
I told you before - it's one of your hysterical fans.
Stella died many years ago, you know that.
This woman does not look like Stella.
And even if she does, what of it?
In fact, I could never understand
how you could like a woman who looked like that.
You have good taste, you- you are a great English writer.
How could you forget that?
Oh, forgive me, sir-
I- I'm horrible.
I'm tactless.
I- don't know what I'm saying.
Patrick! He doesn't want to see me!
Patrick, he is refusing to see me again!
Shoo! Shoo! Accursed things.
Darting around all day long.
The scoundrels! Just you wait,
you haven't got long, you know!
(indistinct)
Indulging your sweet tooth?
Who's there?
Is that you, Relb?
That sounds like a joke.
There's only two lilliputians in the house.
They meet on the table and one asks the other:
"Is that you?"
I'm asking, is that you, Relb?
Why did you climb up there, Flim?
- I was thirsty.
- U-huh.
I saw the unfinished tea on the table,
and I wanted to drink it.
- And what's that on your belt?
- A flask.
A flask...
What for?
Why are you interrogating me?
Because you're lying and don't want to tell the truth.
You never meant to drink the tea, Flim.
You wanted to bring it for Betty.
What of it?
You lied, Flim.
Another man is having tea with my wife,
and when I catch them red-handed,
they tell me: "what of it?"
She's unwell, she needs lemon tea.
You weren't there.
Even more so. Another man should not have tea
with a woman when her husband is not home.
Did she call you?
Yes.
What do you mean?
She was moaning.
That's different, Flim!
When you call, it's for someone, for a specific person.
And when you moan, it's in general, to no one!
Fine, let's move the sugar.
Look at them, building kitchenware that tall...
Come on, help me out!
Move over a bit.
And, lift.
These damn English!
Think of the number of normal people you could
feed with a chunk of sugar this big.
Or the amount of candy you could make,
lollipops for the girls...
Or those... do you remember,
back home they used to make them,
those brown-coloured ones, so good.
- Stretchies.
- Yeah. They don't make them here.
No, don't get me wrong.
Their country is advanced, prosperous.
Can't argue with that.
It's an advanced country.
The roads are straight.
And the houses, the cabs...
- What's that?
- The carriages.
Listen... Did you ever think about going back?
No.
Who knows, maybe the king forgave you by now.
I said "no"!
And besides, what do you mean, "forgave"?
It's ME who hasn't forgiven HIM!
And that's why I'm not going back!
The past is done with!
And now I live here!
I'm an Englishman!
And I like it here!
Why are you laughing?
I'm not laughing.
I'm an Englishman!
Yes, of course. No need to yell.
And I like it here very much!
Yes, alright, you're an Englishman.
Yes, an Englishman.
Listen to you talk! HIM forgiving ME!
Alright, I'm sorry.
Maybe he did forgive me.
And why aren't you returning, Flim?
I have an idea how to get the tea.
One of us needs to stand on the other's shoulders.
I can stand on the bottom, since I'm taller.
You? Taller? You taller than me?
Stop that, I've always been taller than you.
Remember, in the army? And at the balls?
I was always in the first rows.
- Many years have passed.
- Alright, let's check.
OK, but it's hard to do without an arbiter.
Let's go ask Betty.
Why bring Betty into it?
What kind of shoes are you wearing?
Same kind as yours.
We've checked numerous times,
and every time you're looking for some excuse.
Fine, fine, fine.
I'll stand on the bottom, because I'm stronger.
If you like. But keep in mind I'll be forced to walk over you.
It's not like I expect anything better of you,
you wretched lilliput.
- Me? A lilliput?
- A lilliput.
- I'm the lilliput?
- So you are.
And who's calling me that? Who? Huh?
Also a lilliput.
- You fool. What a fool you are.
- I'm a lilliput, I'm a lilliput too.
I was wondering when you'll regain your sense of humour.
Your wonderful sense of humour.
Alright, that's enough. Let's climb.
- Are you sure you won't drop me?
- I don't know, we'll see.
Let's go.
Onwards! Keep going!
Wow...
What a view!
Well?
What's up there?
The owner drank half the cup.
And?
So what?
What now?
We'll think of something.
Be careful up there.
If you fall, I'll get the blame.
Don't worry about me, Relb.
What a view!
It's an unforgettable sight, Relb.
When Betty is well again,
we'll need to climb up together,
up on the cupboard.
This view is really something!
You know, you can see the cupboard corner.
Enough talking already. Get down.
Hold on, the flask is still filling.
Flim!
- Can I ask you a question?
- Well?
Do you really like my wife?
Why aren't you answering?
I'm trying to think of a good answer.
If I say "yes, very much", you'll be jelous.
If I say "not really", Betty will be hurt.
I'll be leaving you soon, Relb.
Where will you go?
I'll move to another town.
What for?
We've got to end this, haven't we?
We're only causing each other grief,
traveling together like this.
I'll leave.
You'll perish alone.
I'll think of something to do.
I'm a pianist after all, Relb.
And not a bad one, either.
Don't talk nonsense.
Have you seen the local musical instruments?
Every key is the size of a log.
How do you intend to play?
With my feet, Relb.
I already figured it out.
If I jump fast enough from key to key,
the melody comes out pretty good.
I already rehearsed.
I mean, you can't play any complex pieces,
but the popular jingles come out pretty decent.
Stop that! You're a good musician,
you shouldn't degrade your art by playing primitive jingles.
Who here knows I'm a good musician?
I know it.
And Betty.
That's why I want to get away from you.
Come on, don't talk nonsense!
It's demeaning to jump from key to key
like a flea!
You're a human being!
You shouldn't lose your dignity.
Besides, you're my friend.
And you like my wife.
And most importantly, we're from over there.
Three normal people in this enormous,
god-forsaken country.
We've got to stick together.
And you can't abandon us, Flim.
Yes, alright, Relb.
I was just daydreaming.
And you should come over,
even when no one calls you.
When we don't call you - you should come anyway.
Thank you.
I dropped my shoe.
One second.
What's that in your shoe?
I'm asking, what's in your shoe?
Give it a rest, what's it to you?
You son of a bitch!
The insoles.
You've got lifted insoles and hidden heels.
Betty!
Stop yelling, you fool.
What's the matter?
So there's insoles, so what?
Betty!
Come here!
Here, look at this!
He's got hidden heels!
He's got hidden heels! He's a scumbag!
He's a liar!
Silence! I won't have this in front of Betty!
Scumbag! Thrice-damned scumbag!
And Betty should know!
I always checked our height honestly.
- Betty, I was always honest, and he, the reprobate!
- Stop it!
In all our disputes he won by trickery!
And back in the army. And at court.
And before you! Before you, Betty, do you hear?
Enough now, come on.
You are no longer my friend, Flim.
You deceived me.
You deceived my wife.
She's a trusting woman!
I saw the admiration in her eyes when she looked at you.
- You looked at him, didn't you? Didn't you?
- Yes.
She admits it! Did you hear?
She admits it!
She would say to me:
"Look, Relb, Flim grows taller every day!"
If she only knew! Oh, if she only knew.
I did know.
Yes, she did know!
She knew because she saw me with no shoes on!
What?
She saw! Do you understand?
She saw!
With no shoes on?
You mean with nothing on?
- Is that true?
- Yes.
It's true.
Leave her alone, you truth-seeker!
If you love truth so much, listen to this:
me and Betty have loved each other for a long time!
And I enter your room because she calls me!
- Shut up.
- She calls me! Yes, she calls me, you understand?
- I'll kill you, Flim.
- I was always above you.
And I'm not talking about the heels.
I always reached greater heights.
Even now, I stand on the very edge of the glass.
Under me, the abyss of the unfinished tea,
and I don't care!
Come join me up here, Betty!
- No, no...
- I'll show you the moon's reflection in the inkpot!
- I'll get you, Flim.
- You won't reach me, you wretched lilliput!
Lilliput! Lilliput!..
Help!
Help!
Flim!
- Help him! He can't swim!
- Try to swim, Flim!
- You can't abandon us, Flim!
- Please!
- Try to get out!
- Flim! Somebody!
- Please!
- Save him! Somebody!
I had a sad dream
in the midnight darkness.
All I remember
is that in the dream we parted forever.
And I cried in my sleep,
And I was very frightened
when I awoke at dawn.
And yet it is even more frightening
When you have no dreams at all,
No dreams at all...
Let's get the case history.
Full name.
Full name.
Can you tell me your name, sir?
I repeat.
Your full name.
Jonathan Swift.
With an "F"?
- What?
- I'm asking, is "Swift" spelled with an "F"?
Yes, doctor, obviously.
- Year of birth?
- 1667.
Occupation?
Clergyman, philosopher, writer.
Writer?
So our dean also writes?
Interesting.
- Are you joking, sir?
- I never joke, especially not during work.
You have not read Mr Swift's books?
I don't read fiction.
I barely have enough time for professional literature.
And you have not heard about his pamphlets,
or his famous "Gulliver's Travels"?
Why... of course I have....
It's about that fat one, who eats a lot?
That's "Gargantua", sir. By Rabelais.
- "Gulliver" is entirely different.
- In that case I don't recall.
Forgive me, Mr Simpson, but I don't think you can help Mr Swift.
To treat an artist without knowing his creations?
I'll be forced to write to the Board of Trustees
and request another doctor.
Yes, write the request, nurse.
That's within your rights.
But I fear the Board of Trustees will
find it easier to replace the nurse.
Oh yes, I remember!
Gulliver, that's a children's book.
The book was written for adults, sir.
I remember now. It's about a doctor who went to the
land of the lilliputians, and... some other such place.
Not "someplace". Laputa, Balnibarbi, Luggnagg,
Glubbdubdrib, and finally the country of the Houyhnhnms.
These are all very serious matters, sir.
I see no sense in presenting a vulgar and crude summary.
It will serve you much better to read it.
Now the dean is tired, he finds this discussion unpleasant.
Please.
Doctor, please don't be angry at Vanessa.
She is ill-mannered, but she loves the dean.
And does that gladden or upset you?
That doesn't matter.
Vanessa helps Mr Swift in his work.
She handles his correspondence.
So you are defending her?
I have to be forgiving toward her.
She lost her head.
Was it you singing by the window?
Many years ago, the dean knew a woman named Vanessa.
He even dedicated a poem to her.
Vanessa mistakenly thought that she is
the same woman he wrote about.
It's a beautiful poem.
But how can you trust poetry?
When the dean was on a roll, he could write
poems even to a broomstick.
No, doctor.
He loved another woman all his life.
He wrote letters to her.
And what letters...
Over a thousand of them remain.
Well then!
I hope she did not bear YOUR name?
He called her Stella.
That was also a name he made up.
Our dean had quite the imagination.
So who was this dean of yours married to?
He was not married at all.
There were two women in his life, but his sense of honour
did not allow him to wound either of them.
So did they both die?
Yes.
At the same time?
Why did you think that?
Because otherwise he could marry the surviving one.
Excuse me, sir, are you from Nottinghamshire?
Yes. Why?
I thought so.
So did they die or didn't they?
I'm asking you!
Mark my words, sir...
...in this house everyone dies and no one dies.
The damned lilliputians!
- You can't take a step without... and the flying island...
- That's enough!- enough with the lilliputians!- enough!
What lilliputians? What flying islands?
Or did you dream them up in a nightmare?
- And you?
- What about me?
Did you also dream them up?
Two of them, by the glass of tea?
One's a pianist, the other's married.
The one with the insoles is taller. Right?
- The taller one is the one WITHOUT insoles.
- See?
See what nightmare we're living?
Everyone dreams the same dreams here!
It's all because of that dean Swift.
It's his bad influence.
How can it be his influence? He doesn't speak a word!
That's right.
He preaches silently.
Even at the pulpit. You know? He'll stand there
in front of the congregation and be silent.
And they're silent too.
Then he'll go like this,
and that's it, suddenly the Irish dislike the governor,
they are unnerved by poverty and don't want to go hungry.
I think your dean is just trying
to pull wool over everyone's eyes.
I agree with you entirely.
He's like Hamlet.
Remember, he played the flute and everything seemed fine,
then one day he got over-agitated and cut everyone
to pieces, including Guildenstern and Rosencrantz.
- What is it?
- Don't forget Polonius.
I don't feel sorry for Polonius.
But the other two suffered for no good reason.
Pardon... I didn't understand.
Who were you talking about?
Didn't you read Sheakspeare?
- I only read professional literature, you see...
- You are a great man, sir, untarnished by culture!
You'll bring this place to order.
Do you hear that?
A perfect example of his bad influence.
You know what that is? The insane giant Gluum
wants to have a death battle with the knight Lancelot.
What I want to know is, why does he need it,
and WHERE I'm supposed to get him a Lancelot.
Would you like a look?
Yes.
He's tall like this.
Let's go.
- Lancelot! Lancelot!
- Quiet down now! Calm down!
- Quiet!
- Lancelot!
Who is that man on stilts?
So you think?..
You mean those are just stilts?!
Sir, you are absolutely correct, he's on stilts.
Of course you'll say you didn't know that.
I did. I knew it. I sensed, I suspected it.
But to tell with such certainty at a single glance - brilliant!
Tell that bloke on stilts
that sir Lancelot has arrived and wishes to fight him.
Right!
Now we'll see what kind of giant he is.
Now we'll see!
- Take a weapon and armour.
- There's no need.
Yes, there is!
May I sound the signal?
That's not necessary.
Yes, it is!
Everything has to be like in a real tourney!
Long live the traditions
of not-so-long-bygone days!
The knights go into battle with swords drawn.
The heralds sound the trumpets.
It is time to start.
Let's see how well heroes can die!
Onwards, mylords!
Onwards with no fear!
Pierce the armour with a powerful strike!
A sword across the throat, a spear into the belly!
Let me introduce you.
Sir Lancelot.
And this is Gluum.
Gluum the Giant.
Sir Lancelot, I'm glad you accepted my challenge,
very glad.
I hope the battle will be fair and merciless.
I don't like foolish jokes.
I came here to fight a giant,
and you're a man of less than average height,
Five feet at most.
Five foot seven.
But I really am a giant.
It might be hard to believe, but it's true.
It's just that I've sunk low.
How did it happen?
- I could tell you...
- But make it brief.
Certainly.
A glass of wine, if I may.
Yes. And don't let anyone in.
How long have you been drinking?
It's my medication.
Medication...
Sir, I can tell you the whole story.
- I really am a giant, though nowadays
it might be hard to believe.
- Excuse me!
Not so with my father.
Gluum Senior. He was 200 feet tall.
He was taller than the Dublin Cathedral.
And that, as it turns out, was blasphemy.
The local bishop demanded that father should
always walk bent over.
So the poor man stooped all his life,
as though he had radiculitis.
He was from Brobdingnag.
The land of the giants,
which dean Swift described so well.
You've read about it, I hope?
What's the matter?
Don't get distracted, sir.
I'm listening. Go on.
My father ended up in England after a shipwreck.
He did not live long here. He suffered greatly
from the mismatch between his size and the local standards.
Where is Patrick, damn it?
How long does it take to get a glass of wine?
Quiet down, quiet down, sir.
You are not in a pub.
You are here for a battle, so mind your manners.
- Alright, I'm sorry.
- Here you are.
Quiet, quiet, calm down.
They'll begin in a minute.
I said they'll begin in a minute!
See, they're warming up.
Sir, you are looking upon
the most unfortunate of all creatures.
And my misfortune lies in the fact that besides a
great height, I also inherited an enormous brain.
And so I started to develop rapidly.
Yes.
I started to speak when I was five days old.
And in several languages simultaneously.
Started reading, writing and counting while still in the crib.
Completed high school in three days,
college in one month.
In a year, exclusively through self-study, reached the
level of knowledge of a member of the British Academy.
All of that started to irritate my compatriots.
And that's when I started to grow.
Yes, I grew incredibly fast.
Foot by foot, I rose higher and higher
above my fellow countrymen.
Soon I had a bird's eye view of the earth.
Sir, I saw how beautiful it is.
The picturesque hills and mountains.
But I saw also how it was suffering.
The forests being burned.
The people killing each other over a plot of land.
Unfortunately, with giants everything is over the top -
eyesight, hearing, moral sense...
Every gunshot echoed in my ears.
Every death tore my heart to pieces.
And I decided to make my country happy.
I thought I could convince everyone to make peace,
I thought I knew the meaning of existence...
I went to the king.
And he wouldn't see me.
Sir, would you order the servant to bring another glass?
We are coming to the sad part.
- That's excessive.
- Do it, Patrick.
Go on.
- An interesing tourney indeed!
- Our king said, "isn't there anyone who will
teach this upstart a lesson?"
They declared war on me.
I could have killed all the king's knights
with one swipe of the hand.
But how could I do that to my fellow countrymen?
I realized: the stronger man has to yield.
I thought: "Let me die, if that will serve my country."
The knights turned out to be useless.
Their horses threw them, their arrows missed the mark.
Their lances could not even pierce my breeches.
The king agreed to meet me and said: "Don't make
a fool of yourself. Shrink down, make yourself lower."
"Be like everyone else."
This is the last one, sir.
That's it, don't ask for any more.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
And so, I started to shrink.
Don't ask me, sir, how I did it, you won't need it.
There's a set of special exercises -
bowing in different ways, squatting down...
Gradually I descended,
every day coming closer to the level of my compatriots.
Shrinking my brain was more difficult.
But alcohol helped.
Taking alcohol three times a day clears your head
of excess knowledge and unnecessary thoughts.
In the first year I struggled to forget
everything I learned since the academy.
Then it became easier.
It took me a month to forget college.
A week to forget high school.
Philosophy took me a day or maybe three, I don't recall.
History took a day.
The, what do you call it,..
Whatever it is, I forgot it without effort in two hours.
Then suddenly dean Swift began to ring the church bells,
gather the insane, everyone together... And I, you know...
wanted to come, like everyone... with the people...
you know... like that, as they say...
the people, the laughter...
But then this thought came into my head:
"Why not return to the good old days, Gluum?"
"Why not rise up there again, right to the clouds?"
I felt the urge to do something for my country.
I can't be successful as a giant in life -
but maybe in death?
And that's why I sent you the challenge.
I'm very grateful that you responded.
I heard that you are a brave and fearless knight,
and you won't refuse to battle me.
Unfortunately, that is impossible.
- Why?
- Well, firstly, I don't feel any enmity towards you.
And second, I don't approve of duels.
It- it's not a duel. It's a tourney.
It's about the triumph of courage, of skill.
No, sir Lancelot.
See, the people are waiting for heroic deeds.
It's been too long since the people saw brave fighters.
We need heroes.
Hey, hey now! Stop!
I'm not Lancelot. I'm a doctor.
Dr Simpson. I want to help you.
Patrick!
I don't like foolish jokes!
You could say that I'm insane, that you're a doctor...
...but I'll get on my stilts, you'll take up a sword,
and the giant will meet Lancelot in battle!
- Quiet, calm down...
- Get away from me!
You coward! You brag in pubs about past victories, and
when the hour comes to test your strength, you hide!
Oh England, you have no heroes left!
Let's go, let's go.
Hey! Why'd you do that!
If your hand forgot how to hold a sword,
at least mine won't hesitate!
Doctor! We need to catch him.
- You won't even have to mar your hands.
- Easy now!..
- No, stop!
- All you need to do is take the credit!
All hail brave Lancelot!
Doctor! Doctor!
It was an accident. Not your fault! By no means.
Quick, wash the blood off.
Destroy the evidence. Quickly now.
Why destroy the evidence?
Huh, my friend?
It's not blood.
It's cranberry juice.
Get up, Mr Gluum. Do you hear me?
Get up, get up!
It's not blood!
It's cranberry juice!
What's going on, sir judge?
What is the meaning of this?
By what rights? This is a private residence!
Beg pardon, ma'am, but when a private residence is
invaded by crooks, sooner or later law must follow.
This is cruel.
Doctor, how can you allow our patients-
They are actors.
Only traveling actors.
And they will be punished according to law.
They turned this house into a circus.
Do you see, honoured dean, how these people
exploited your benevolent will?
You thought to ease the suffering of the unfortunate,
and instead sheltered charlatans.
This is the scoundrel who tricked you.
Here he is.
Forgive me, sir, I never thought it would turn out
this way. I only wanted what's best.
It's all because of the will.
When sir Swift made it, I thought - what will happen...
...if our house really becomes filled with the insane?
I'm a butler, not a saint. Butlers have feelings too.
- Scumbag.
- And that's when this traveling troup showed up in Dublin.
I came to them and said:
gentlemen, I have a good job offer for you.
You live in dean Swift's house, we provide you
food and drink, and in exchange you clown around.
I mean, sir, that they were to play various
funny people that His Reverence invented.
- What vileness.
- Vileness? Not at all! The dean always loved pranks.
At first everything went well.
It was amusing.
One would pretend to be a lilliput, another a giant...
All good fun.
But then these scoundrels got carried away.
Started to drown each other.
Bloodshed started.
They got the whole town in an uproar.
Riots started in the streets, it spread like an epidemic.
- What will happen to these people?
- Prison, ma'am. That's the best place for them.
Art like theirs needs to be protected and kept under guard.
Don't be lenient with them, sir. They're actors.
Deception is their trade. Each is a Hamlet at heart.
Everything that happens in the house is responsibility
of the administrator. Patrick was only following my orders.
There! I was waiting for that confession, ma'am.
A half-literate servant couldn't come up with
such an elaborate scheme on his own.
It was not a scheme. I was carrying out the dean's will.
You are fired, Ms Vanessa.
The Board of Trustees frees you of all your duties.
Be so kind as to give the keys to the new nurse.
Ms Esther Johnson.
Now she will be managing the household.
The doctor and I are already acquainted.
Though he took me for a madwoman.
- Only for an actress.
- I, at least, never had any doubts as to who you are.
You have too little talent for an actress,
and too little sincerity for a madwoman.
But I'm glad the Board chose you. I hope the time
you spent eavesdropping has done you good.
Do you have any requests for me?
Of course. Don't hang up curtains with flowers.
The dean will not stop you, but it will pain him.
He can't stand banality.
Very well, sister, I will remember your request.
But I will get rid of these curtains for certain.
As well as these suits of armour, the pistols,
and the masks too.
Patrick, why are you not writing that down?
- How?
- That does not concern me.
All I need is for you to follow my orders exactly.
Take off his handcuffs.
The scoundrel, using any excuse not to work!
- Start writing, Patrick.
- I'm writing.
- Move the desk to the cabinet, the cabinet to the fireplace.
- To the fireplace...
- But the fireplace is over there.
- Then we will move it here.
- The fireplace?
- Yes.
Get rid of these curtains immediately.
I want the dean to see his actors.
The actors are about to be taken away.
No, sir judge. Didn't you hear the dean's request?
He is asking you not to take them away today.
He wants to say goodbye.
Let them stay till morning.
The wake is not yet over.
Alright - on your responsibility.
And no performances! Keep the actors under guard.
That's it.
Where is that fine line,
Imperceptible to the eye,
Where the mind so easily
Slips beyond sanity?
The heart bursts, and out spills-
is that blood or berry juice?
Believe me, it makes no difference.
Either way, our hearts are pierced
by a violent pain -
maybe anger, maybe love.
Dolls can cry real tears,
words can burn like fire,
The drum explodes, the audience gives an ovation,
And to the sound of applause
new decorations are being put up -
A new farce is about to begin.
Listen closely, sir.
In this house every sound is the start of a melody.
And every seed here must take root.
Stop that singing!
Let them be, they're not being loud.
Stop, that's enough!
No performances allowed. That goes for all of you.
And don't crowd in the front.
You're right. But it's kind of a shame.
I saw some of their stuff, I liked it.
Especially about the lilliputians.
- When one of them drowned in the glass?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, it was pretty dramatic.
- And the one about the giant wasn't bad.
And especially with that bloke - hilarious!
The one who lives forever.
Which one is that?
The one who forgot himself. He's like: the oak is
500 years old, and I remember when it was an acorn.
There he is.
Hey! You, come here!
- What are you doing, leave 'em be.
- Come on, just a chat.
Let's see you!
There you are.
Did you want me, gentlemen?
Look at how he's dressed - hilarious!
What's your name?
I'm asking you, what's your name?
You see... I've lived on Earth such a long time... that I
forgot my name, so please, just call me Someone.
"Someone". Hear that?
So how long DID you live, "Someone"?
A few thousand years.
A few thousand, he says! Hilarious!
There is no reason to laugh, gentlemen.
Every person lives on Earth for a few thousand years.
Sometimes more.
But you've lost your memory.
By the way, I remember meeting you before, sir.
About fifty years ago, I think.
Fifty? Liar!
I'm only thirty-five.
That's in this life.
We've met in your other life, your previous one.
I recall it vividly.
You were standing at your post in Market Square,
by the city jail.
- But that's where he's posted now!
- This is now, and that was then. During George I's reign.
- Wha?
- I'm sure it was you. I noted your red mustache and freckles.
You can recall it yourself, if you just try a little.
Well well, and how do I do that?
Close your eyes. Concentrate.
I'll help you. We'll try this together.
OK, let's try.
Well?
Now calmly, without rush,
try to look over the whole life you've lived.
- Well?
- And now try to recall yourself at thirty years old.
- Do you remember?
- Yeah.
- And at twenty?
- Yeah. That's when I married Polly.
- Wonderful. And now - at ten. Do you remember?
- We lived near Glasgow, in a little village...
Stay focused. We are coming to the most important part.
You are five... Do you remember?
- Vaguely.
- Now you are four... three... two... one...
Now you're in the womb.
- Where?
- In the womb.
You lie there, curled in the fetal position.
Your mother's blood flows through you.
Try to remember. Come on, just try!
And now you pass from this life - into the previous one.
And there you are, in your uniform and helmet,
standing in the Market Square of Dublin, by the city jail.
The carriages drive by you, the pigeons fly overhead,
and you stand there and stare at them.
I remember.
Listen, I remember!
- You're lying.
- I swear it! There I am, in Market Square!
- But that's where you're posted now!
- This is now. And that was then!
Good Lord and Virgin Mary, I always had the feeling
that I lived before!
All people lived before.
You just need to learn to remember it.
Dean Swift preached as much.
- Alright, quiet now, enough. Let's go, Jack.
- There I am, in Market Square!
Yeah yeah, in Market Square, calm down! Let's go.
Sir dean, your vow of silence is getting old.
You must put a stop to this.
Sir Someone... are you asleep?
It's OK, get some rest.
I mean, pardon me for disturbing you...
But I was wondering if I could go a little deeper.
How do you mean?
To remember my past life. So, uh... We got to the point
where I stand by the jail in Market Square, right?
- That's during King George's reign?
- Yes.
- Try to remember more.
- Here I am at 30, at 20, I get married to Polly...
- And in your past life you were also married to Polly?
- Looks like it.
That other Polly was a little younger though,
cooked better... didn't take all my money...
In short, she was a little more like Kathy,
you know, this other girlie.
I met her on a trip to Manchester, we visited relatives...
Don't get distracted. Focus and try to remember.
You're twenty, and you are marrying Polly who is like Kathy.
Then you're ten... then five...
Four... three... two... one...
Now you're in the womb...
Now go back. Back, just a little more!
And you're in your pre-previous life.
- That would be during King Edward?
- Yes.
- Got it.
- I remember.
- What?
I'm posted by the jail in Market Square.
Maybe you're getting mixed up?
- I'm standing by the jail. On guard duty.
- I feared as much.
Hold on, what do you mean, sir?
No sense trying to remembering more, Jack.
I'm afraid you will only get more of the same.
The times will change, and you'll still be standing
at your post in Market Square.
- Why?
- I guess... that's your fate, Jack.
But... but that's such a shame, sir.
Well, what can you do?
That... is such a shame, sir.
I mean, I suspected that I've never been a... you know,
any great lord... or a dean like your Swift...
But like this?
What did I do to deserve it?
I stand there, year after year, and nothing changes.
Excuse me, sir, but I must stop you.
Conversations like this are dangerous.
I'm afraid this might end badly.
Something's not right here!
I... need to... change something.
Hey! Jack, what are you doing?
Do not come closer!
I, a man named Jack Smith, consider these people innocent,
and I give them freedom!
What are you doing? Have you gone mad?!
Don't come closer!
I'm setting these people free.
They may go, they have not done anyone harm.
You will be punished, idiot!
- I don't care!
- Jack, you'll go on trial! Think what you're doing!
Think what YOU're doing!
Stop! Don't do this, Jack!
Jack, stop!
Forgive me, but this was my duty.
Duty!
Alert!
Get out, all of you, quick!
There, that's it. That's it, sir.
See how easy it is?
Now... everything will be different for me... right?
Yes. Now everything will be different.
Now a new leaf has been turned.
A new leaf has been turned.
Well, I don't want a completely new one.
Let Polly still be there. And Kathy.
Yes. Yes, of course.
Let them still be there.
But the ending... let the ending be different.
The ending will be different.
But this is blood.
This is blood!
But it's real blood!
Cast:
Swift - Oleg Yankovskiy
Dr Simpson - Aleksandr Abdulov
Patrick - Vladimir Belousov
Gluum - Evgeniy Leonov
Vanessa - Marina Ignatova
Esther - Aleksandra Zakharova
Someone - Aleksandr Sirin
Relb - Aleksandr Zbruev
Flim - Nikolay Karachentsov
Betty - Tatyana Rudina
Jack - Viktor Proskurin
(and others...)
Screenplay by Grigori Gorin
Directed by Mark Zakharov
(and others...)
(Translated for you by Naireth)
End of Part 1