De-Lovely (2004) - full transcript

(PIANO PLAYING)

GABE: Hello, Cole.

I let myself in.

We're not late, are we?
I hate to be late.

No, no, we're fine.

That sounded lovely.

I hate funeral music.

Though,
under the circumstances,

I suppose
I should say my prayers.

Why start now?

Exactly.



If I believed in God,
he would be
a song-and-dance man.

He would have to
carry a tune.

Preferably one of mine.

Do you think
he would like this?

(PIANO PLAYING)

♪.In the still of the night

♪.As I gaze from my window

♪.At the moon in its flight

♪.My thoughts
all stray to you♪

GABE:
You wrote that
about Linda, of course.

Did I?

Songs don't have to be
about someone, you know.

We should start.

I thought we had.



Cole, you have
to play us into it.

It's your life.
Your music will be our guide.

Swell.

♪.In the still of the night

♪.As I gaze from my window

Oh, my God,
that's me!
I'm so young.

You satisfied?

♪.At the moon in its flight

He's very good.

Not much
of a singer.

You never were.

♪.In the still of the night

The words,
I can't hear the words.

♪.While the world
is in slumber♪

(BLOWS WHISTLE)

What's the matter,
can't he take direction?

Cole, talk to me,
I'll pass your
thoughts along.

He can't hear you.

In a musical,
everyone works
for the composer.

Yes, well,
times have changed.
May I borrow this?

(BLOWS WHISTLE)

♪.Times have change

Never open with a ballad.

This isn't one of those
avant-garde things, is it?

It's got to be entertaining,
it's a musical.

And a love story,
of course.

A little unconventional,
but honest.

You're playing with my life.

It's my show.

(YOUNG COLE CONTINUES)
♪.Stead of landing

♪.on Plymouth rock

♪.Plymouth rock

♪.Would land on them

CHORUS:
♪.In olden days

GABE:
It's your life, Cole.

♪.Was looked on
something shocking

Oh, my God.

It's an opening number,
of course.

♪.Anything goes

It's the Berlins.

Irving, Ellin.

Irving gave me my start.
This is my whole life.

There's Monty Woolley
from Yale.

Look at Monty.

That costume is all wrong.
He never wore that.

That's all wrong. Change it.

♪.And black's white today
and day's night today

ELDERLY COLE:
L. B. Mayer
and the gang from MGM.

Oh, the Hollywood years.

♪.When folks who still
can ride in jitneys

♪.Found out that
Vanderbilts and Whitneys

♪.lack baby clothes

♪.Anything goes

Boris and Jack.

GABE:
Bill, Bill Wrather.

Gerald, Sara, Honoria,
where are the boys?

Boys. Boys.

♪.Anything goes

KID:
Hi, Mom.

♪.And every night,
the set that's smart

♪.Is intruding on
nudist parties in studios

♪.Anything goes

ELDERLY COLE:
Fantastic.

♪.So though I'm not
a great romancer

♪.I know that
you're bound to answer

♪.when I propose

♪.Anything goes

LINDA:
♪.If saying your
prayers you like

♪.If green pears you like

♪.If old chairs you like,
if backstairs you like,

♪.if love affairs you lik

Stop, stop, stop,
this is wrong for Linda.

She should sing
a different part, stop.

Is it me?

Oh, no, dear.

It's backstairs
and love affairs.

It's too early
for complications.

Now, we're gonna
get ready for Paris.

If you're not in Paris,
I'll see you later.

Come on, move along.

You're doing beautifully.
But then, you always do.

Remember,
it's your story, too.
It's a love story.

That's why
I'm frightened.

Don't be.

Have you ever seen a musical
without a happy ending?

All right, then.

So, we've just
heard Anything Goes

as if it's Cole's
declaration of independence.

Independence from whom?

Never mind.

Don't argue
with the director, love.

Leave that to me.
He's very strict.

She can't hear you.

I know.

Now, you're seeing Cole
for the first time.

You start to move
towards him

because there's
a spirit in his eye.

Go ahead.

Move slowly.

You'll be fine.

♪.Weren't we fools
to lose each other?

♪.Weren't we fools
to say goodbye?

God, she was beautiful.

She could
stop your heart.

No, start it.

♪.You chose another

♪.So did I

♪.If we'd realized
our love was worth defending

♪.Then the story's
broken threads

♪.we might be mending

They're so good,

it's a shame
more people aren't
paying attention.

Cole can
take care of that.

Which one
is Cole Porter?

The one who's standing,
who's being

so serious
about being playful,

that's my husband, Gerald.

And the one who's
playing at not being
serious at all,

that's Cole Porter.

Hmm.

Has somebody died?

I think it was us, Cole.

Linda Lee.
Sara Murphy.

We met at Lady Mendel's.
Yes, indeed.

Is that Linda Lee Thomas
with Sara?

I really couldn't say.

No, it is, and just
as they described her,

the most beautiful
divorcee in Paris.

My God, she's ravishing.

Is this gonna be another
Porter fascination?

An obsession
without preliminaries?

Obsessions don't
have preliminaries.

Will you join me?
I'm a married man.

No, come on. Grab a chair.

Let's really light a fire
under these deadbeats.

(PLAYING RAPIDLY)

You begin.

♪.I have heard,
among this clan

♪.You are called
"The forgotten man"

♪.Well, did you ever?

♪.Ha, what a swell party
this is

♪.Have you heard
that Mimsie Starr

♪.Just got pinched
in the Astor Bar?

♪.Well, did you ever?

BOTH:
♪.What a swell party this is

Take over.

You won't
pinch her in the ass,
are you?

I might.

♪.Reggie's rather
scatterbrained

♪.He dove in when
the pool was drained

♪.Well, did you ever?

♪.What a swell party this is

♪.It's great, it's grand

♪.It's wonderland

♪.It's tops,
it's first

♪.It's DuPont,
it's Hearst

♪.What clothes,
quel chic

♪.What pearls,
they're the peak

♪.What glamour,
what cheer

♪.This will
simply slay you, dear

♪.Have you heard

♪.the coast of Maine
just got hit by a hurricane?

ALL:
♪.Well, did you ever?

♪.What a swell party this is

♪.Have you heard
that poor dear Blanche

♪.Got run down
by an avalanche?

ALL:
♪.Well, did you ever?
What a swell party this is

♪.What daiquiris

♪.What sherry, please

♪.What burgundy

♪.What great pommery

♪.What brandy, wow

♪.What whiskey,
here's how

♪.What gin and what beer

♪.Will you sober up,
my dear?

(ALL LAUGHING)

♪.Have you heard,
Professor Munch

♪.Ate his wife and
divorced his lunch?

ALL:
♪.Well, did you ever?
What a swell party this is

♪.Have you heard,
it's in the stars

♪.Next July,
we collide with Mars?

ALL:
♪.Well, did you ever?
What a swell party

♪.A swell party,
a swellegant, elegant party

♪.This is

(ALL CHEERING)

God, we're a hit!

Now we have a party.

(PEOPLE EXCLAIMING)

Shall we?
Yes, let's.

Oh!
Oh, my God!

Grace personified.

Does that... Does that mean,
did I sweep you
off your feet?

Because I really hadn't
the intention to do
that for quite a while.

You really are
rather smooth, aren't you,
Mr. Porter?

Never till now,
Mrs. Thomas.

Your song was
absolutely delirious.

Well, thank you.
I'm never sure
if they get the joke.

Especially when
it's on them.

Learn to trust
your audience.

Oh, I trust it, I just
wish I could expand it.

ELDERLY COLE:
He seems a bit calculating,
don't you think?

GABE:
Well, weren't you?

Not entirely.

I said I was ambitious,
but I was anything
but an opportunist.

After all,
I spent 10 years in Paris

just having fun.

So what are
we talking here,
a love affair?

A business proposition

or a social arrangement?

There was nothing arranged

or negotiated
about our relationship.

It was...

Our own.

(LINDA CHUCKLING)

What about these gloves?
Is it really true

that you only wear them
once and then
you discard them?

Yes.

To where do you
discard them
when you're finished?

I send them to
a cousin in Louisville.

Not this one, all right?
Let me keep this.

Well, well.

Look at that hand.
You should never
cover your hands,

they're beautiful.

They're ungainly.

No, they're strong.

No one's ever thought of me
as strong before.

Oh, I think of you
as strong
and down to earth

and solid.
I think of you
in many ways.

You're sweet.

Isn't that
Diaghilev and his boy
from the Ballets Russes?

That's his
premier danseur.

Would you like
to meet them?

Don't know, would I?

Perhaps another time.
Bonjour.

DIAGHILEV:
He is an acquaintance
from yesterday.

An unmanned piano.
Come on.

(LAUGHING)

♪.I know you hate to hear

♪.That I adore you, dear

Not you, dear.

♪.But grant me,
just the same

♪.I'm not entirely to blame

♪.For

♪.You'd be

♪.So easy to love

ELDERLY COLE:
Christ, that cue is
as loud as my whistle.

And it's too early
for another song.

If you can say it better than
you write it, fine.
Otherwise, Cole sings.

Oh, all right.

♪.The yearning for

♪.So swell to keep
every home fire

Thank you.

♪.Burning for

♪.We'd be so grand
at the game

♪.So carefree together

♪.That it does
seem a shame

♪.If you can't see

♪.Your future with me

♪.'Cause you'd be

♪.Oh, so easy to love

(LAUGHING)
Oh, dear Cole.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

You have so much nerve,
Mr. Porter.

God, I'd be frightened.

I'm just showing off.

There are much worse
things to be afraid of.

You have a dazzling gift
and a life to go with it.

What could you
possibly be afraid of?

Myself.

I'm not afraid of that.

I hope you never will be.

Even when you
really get to know me.

COLE:
♪.We'd be so grand

♪.At the game

♪.So carefree together

♪.That it does seem a shame

♪.If you

♪.Can't see

♪.Your future with me

♪.'Cause you'd be

♪.Oh, so easy

♪.To love

(PEOPLE APPLAUDING)

(NEIGHING)

I thought you would be
tired of your apartment.

GABE:
You're gonna have
to help me out here.

I mean,
if this is really you.

Why?

This is how it was.
This is how I was.

I wanted every kind of love
that was available.

I could never find them
in the same person.

Or the same sex.

You know, I've never
had the urge
to be completely honest

with anyone until you.

It's quite disturbing.

Especially
since I haven't been
totally honest.

(LAUGHING)

You knew so much about me
when we met, Cole,

don't you think I'd heard
a thing or two about you?

Then you know about...

Well, that I can be...

(SIGHS)

That I have
other interests.

Interests,
the pursuit of which

some people might
find cruel to you.

You mean men?

Yes, men.

Let's just say you
like them more than I do.

Nothing is cruel that
fulfills your promise.

Oh, God.

I've been promising
all my life.

I've got a notebook
full of promise. Trunks full.

I want to be more
than promising to you.

We could fulfill
your promise together.

We could be
singular as a couple.

Would you stay for dinner?

It will be just us.

I'd like that.

GABE:
So, did you love her then?

ELDERLY COLE:
Then? I don't know.

I thought I might
discover what love was.

The physical side
was always...

Well, we could take it
or leave it.

It was pleasant enough.

But the intimacy
was stunning.

Good morning.

What's that?

Um, it's, uh, an idea
for a song.

(HUMMING)

This part, right here,
I think would go nicely with

"I love you."

What do you think?

I think that
would be beautiful.

I do, you know.

(SIGHING)

You don't have to love me
the way that I love you, Cole.

Just love me.

It's so easy.

Mmm.

(PIANO PLAYING)

♪.This verse you've started
seems to me

♪.The tin pan-tithesis
of melody

♪.So to spare you
all the pain

(EXCLAIMS)

Monty.

I almost didn't
recognize you
under all that hair.

We've all matured
since school, Coley.

At Yale, the only grooms
that interested you
were in the stables.

Monty, behave yourself.

This is the happiest day
of my life.

♪.The night is young,
the skies are clear

♪.So if you wanna
go walking, dear

LINDA:
Along with the bluebird,
the dogwood is

the great harbinger
of the Kentucky spring.

Oh, they're beautiful.
Thank you.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

I'm ready.

Ma'am.

Where is he?

You might prefer privacy.

I would not.

To holy matrimony, then.

And whatever
further perforations
you may put in it.

Excuse me.
What?

♪.Let yourself go

Sorry, Monty.

CODY:
It's good to see you again,
Mrs. Thomas.

It's Mrs. Porter.
Not yet.

Now don't blame poor Cody,

he was only doing
what I told him.

My name never suited?
Thomas not proper enough?

It's another
name for "shame."

Oh, so now you're all
snug and proper, are you?

Marrying this fawn?

Why are you here,
Edward?

Well, there's a certain
section of the bar here.

The left side, I think,
significantly enough,

where your groom
and his gentleman friends

like to call
on each other.

I assumed, for
symbolic purposes at least,

that the wedding
would be held there.
I had to assume, you see,

since my invitation
never arrived.

I would invite you
to hell.
No need.

Already there. Too bad
you never cared for it.

In spite of
caring for you once...

Oh, my fault, then.
You offered care,
I needed passion.

What does the fawn need?

Can you supply him?

Surely not with everything.

And what can
he give you?

Pride.

Don't turn your back
on me, Mrs. Thomas.

That's so funny.

From what I remember,
it was the position
you most favored.

Are you all right?
I'm fine.

EDWARD:
Wait.

Mr. Thomas, you have
the most peculiar
sense of timing.

You think
you can make her happy

just because you won't
violate her delicacy?

Because you don't
need her as a woman?

Ah, um...

I think maybe we define
"woman" differently.

I don't define it
as "punching bag,"
for instance.

Cole's not like you.

He creates,
you destroy.

And as you can see,
you're a failure
even at that.

Let's get married.

♪.See the crowd
in that church

♪.See the proud parson
plopped on his perch

♪.Get the sweet beat
of that organ

♪.Sealing our doom

♪.Here goes the groom, boom!

♪.How they cheer
and how they smile

♪.As we go galloping
down the aisle

♪.It's divine,
dear, it's diveen, dear

♪.It's de-wunderbar,
it's de-victory

♪.It's de-vallop,
it's de-vinner

♪.it's de-voiks

Mrs. Murphy?
Absolutely.

♪.The knot is tied
and so we take

♪.A few hours off
to eat wedding cake

♪.It's delightful,
it's delicious

♪.It's de-lovely

♪.It feels so fine

Thank you, dearest.
For what?

For all of this,
for our future.

For being with me
just now with Edward.

That was nothing.
That was pest control,
that's all.

♪.To the pop of champagne

♪.Off we hop in our
plush little plane

♪.Till a bright light
through the darkness

They seem so happy.

Let's hope
he doesn't misbehave.

♪.Our day's complete

♪.and what a beautiful
bridal suite

♪.It's dreamy, it's drowsy

♪.It's de-reverie,
it's de-rhapsody

♪.It's de-regal,
it's de-royal

♪.It's de-ritz,
it's de-lovely

♪.We settle down

♪.As man and wife

♪.To solve the riddle
called married life

♪.It's delightful

♪.It's deliciou

Now you love her, yes?

I said the words.

I meant them.

I wanted to mean them.

God knows I wrote them
often enough.

And even more
after we were married.

Maybe that
says something.

They did always sound better
with music under them.

God, she was beautiful.

Ah, Venice.

We had such parties.

We had a floating dance floor
on the grand canal.

You know that Robert Browning
once lived in that palazzo?

He got a lot more
written than I did,

but he didn't
have half the fun.

LINDA:
There they are.
Hello, Berlins.

Welcome to Palazzo Rezzonico.

I got so out of hand
that finally

Linda had to bring
in reinforcements.

And being Linda,
she brought the best.

She single-handedly
orchestrated my reformation.

I have to say,
the music is not bad, either.

Is that Cole?
Yes, it is.

♪.This funny thing

♪.Called love

♪.Just who can
solve its mystery?♪

Cole?

You're Irving Berlin.

IRVING:
Am I interrupting?

No, no, I mean, yes.
But it's an honor
to be interrupted

by America's
greatest songwriter.

What a pleasure.

Well, the most publicized,
that's for sure.

And rightfully so.

You know,
Linda has told me and Ellin
so much about you,

she's left out
the most important stuff.

What would that be?

Your songs.

I heard about them,

but I've never actually
heard one played before.

You were listening
to that, huh?
That's a bit daunting.

I think I need a drink.
Can I offer you something?

No, it's ok.

I'm gonna let you
get back to your work.

I'd love to hear the tune
when it's done.

Cole, it's a real pleasure.
A real, real pleasure.

Pleasure's mine,
welcome to Venice.

Thank you very much.

We'll have
some fun later.

IRVING:
Oh, I look forward
to that, Cole.

(PLAYING PIANO)

♪.I was a humdrum person

♪.Leading a life apart

♪.When love flew in
through my window wide

♪.And quickened
my humdrum heart

♪.Love flew in
through my window

♪.I was so happy then

♪.But after love

♪.Had stayed a little while

♪.Love flew out again

♪.What is this thing
called love?

♪.This funny thing

♪.Called love?

♪.Just who can
solve its mystery?

♪.Why should it make

♪.A fool of me?

MALE PERFORMER:
♪.I saw you there

♪.One wonderful day

♪.You took my heart

♪.And threw it away

♪.That's why I ask the Lord

♪.In heaven above

♪.What is this thing

♪.Called love?

♪.What is this thing
called love?

♪.This funny thing

♪.Called love?

♪.Just who can
solve its mystery?

♪.Why should it make

♪.A fool of me?

♪.I saw you there

♪.One wonderful day

♪.You took my heart
and threw it away

COLE:
♪.That's why I ask the lord

♪.In heaven above

♪.What is this thing

♪.Called love

(PEOPLE APPLAUDING)

GERALD:
Bravo, Cole.

You know, Cole,
you're spoiling us.

And, excuse me,
you're pampering yourself.

You have far too much talent
to waste as an amateur.

And we must do
something about that.

I think it may be
the most beautiful
love song you've written yet.

Why, thank you.
There's, uh, quite a bit
of you in it.

What do you think
you'll call it?

I don't know,
something about confusion.

Alors, dinner is served.

COLE:
Yes, let's eat.

Thank you for
your indulgence.

ELDERLY COLE:
That was the truth,
for the most part.

There was a lot of
Linda in that song.

I wish there
could have been more.

BORIS:
We are leaving soon, you know.

The tour begins.

I heard.

(BELLS TOLLING)

I don't like it one bit.

I don't know
what I'm going
to do without you.

Of course, you know,

it is only
a European tour,

and I can travel.

I could
mysteriously appear

in certain European cities
from time to time.

But you are a married man.

What about Mrs. Porter?

Boris, I've told you,

Mrs. Porter

tries very hard
to want what I want.

Surely not everything.

Whatever I need.

As long as she knows
the rest belongs to her.

And what is the rest?

Everything that
happens in the daylight.

Which is why
I have to go.

I'll see you there?
Of course.

(BOTH SPEAKING ITALIAN)

MALE PERFORMER:
♪.You could have
a great career

♪.And you should,
yes, you should

♪.Only one thing
stops you, dear

♪.You're too good,
way too good

♪.If you want
a future, darling,

♪.why don't you get a past?

♪.'Cause that fatal moment's
coming at last

♪.We're all alone,
no chaperone

♪.Can get our number

♪.The world's in slumber

♪.Let's misbehave

♪.There's something wild
about you, child,

♪.it's so contagious

♪.Let's be outrageous

♪.Let's misbehave

♪.When Adam won Eve's hand

♪.He wouldn't stand
for teasing

♪.He didn't care about
those apples out of season

♪.They say that spring
means just one thing

♪.To little lovebirds

♪.We're not above birds,
Let's misbehave♪

I'm being hailed.

(SPEAKING ITALIAN)

It's from Irving.

Irving?
Mmm-hmm.

(MUSIC CONTINUES PLAYING)

(EXCLAIMS)

You knew.

I had hoped.

You knew.

Okay, well, I didn't know
what the show
was to be called.

It's to be called Paris.

And Irving has
assured the producer

that I'm the only one with
the suitable sophistication

to do the show.

So it seems
that we would be
leaving Venice

to go to New York
to do a show called Paris.

Well, we'll go,
won't we?

Darling,
what do you think?

I know you would like to.

You orchestrated
the whole thing,
you willed it into being.

I'm just not sure
I'm ready.

Cole, I promise you,
you are ready.

Irving Berlin believes
in your talent.

He wouldn't recommend you
simply out of friendship.

No, I suppose not.

Cole, it will be
a wonderful chance for you,
and a good change for us.

Yes.

Yes, we'll go?

Yes, it will be a big change.

(CHATTERING)

I think
we need a change.

I never intended this
to cause a breach between us.

It hasn't, it just...

Cole, we never had
a formal agreement,
we don't need one now.

It's done.

I can't promise you that.

Just so it doesn't
put us in jeopardy.

Or your music.

You really love me
that much?

You are
the rhythm of my heart.

They're playing your song.
Would you care to dance?

Why not?

♪.They say that bears
have love affairs

♪.And even camels

♪.We're merely mammals,
Let's misbehave♪

See, true love.

I'm not so sure
about true.

Linda played
that beautifully.

I think that's when I began
to really love her.

All right, Linda, Cole, smile
if you're in love, please.

GABE:
Didn't that make things
even more complicated?

ELDERLY COLE:
What things?

Your other relationships.

No, why should it?

Isn't that why
birds do it, bees do it?

♪.Even educated fleas do it

♪.Let's do it

♪.Let's fall in love

FEMALE PERFORMER:
♪.In Spain,
the best upper sets do it

♪.Lithuanians and Letts
do it

♪.Let's do it

♪.Let's fall in love

♪.The Dutch
in old Amsterdam do it

♪.Not to mention the Finns

MAN:
Welcome, sir.

♪.Folks in Siam do it

♪.Think of Siamese twins

Say hello to Mrs. Porter.

LINDA:
Richard, would you please
take my hat?

♪.People say in Boston,
even beans do it

♪.Let's do it,
let's fall in love

♪.Cold cape cod clams

♪.Against their wish, do it

♪.Even lazy jellyfish do it

♪.Let's do it,
let's fall in love

♪.Electric eels,
I might add, do it

♪.Though it shocks them,
I know

♪.Why ask if shad do it?

♪.Waiter, bring me shad roe

♪.In shallow shoals,
English soles do it

♪.Goldfish in
the privacy of bowls do it

♪.Let's do it

♪.Let's fall in love

♪.The dragonflies
in the reeds do it

♪.Sentimental centipedes
do it

♪.Let's do it

♪.Let's fall in love

♪.Mosquitoes,
heaven forbid, do it

♪.So does every katydid
do it

♪.Let's do it

♪.Let's fall in love

CHORUS:
♪.The most refined

♪.Ladybugs do it

♪.When a gentlemen calls

♪.Moths in your rugs do it

♪.What's the use
of mothballs?

♪.Locusts in trees do it

♪.Bees do it

♪.Even overeducated fleas
do it

♪.Let's do it,
let's fall in love

♪.Let's do it,
let's fall in love

♪.Let's do it,
let's fall in love♪

Very cheeky.
Excellent.

That's so far.

GERALD:
Listen to them.

(APPLAUSE CONTINUES)

One act down,
one to go.

Darling, for you.

God, Linda.

It's exquisite.

Just a little memory.

There are no little memories
with you.

(AUDIENCE CHEERING)

SARA:
Patrick, you all right?

Is he all right
doing that? I mean,
his doctors approve?

Probably not,
but he's got to
have a childhood.

His sickness
seems to come and go.

Patrick, Patrick,
let me give you, uh,
the key to the cartwheel.

It's all mental.

Keep your arms straight.
You're bending your arms.

Here comes trouble.

Straight, you plant it,
watch this, ready?

And plant it
like that. See?

SARA:
Wow!

Good catch.

I always thought so.

♪.Sun-tanned, wind-blown

♪.Honeymooners
at last alone

(WHISPERING)
You know,
this was written as a duet.

Thanks.

♪.Oh, how lucky we are

BOTH:
♪.While I give to you

♪.and you give to me

♪.True love, true love

♪.So on and on
it will always be

♪.True love, true love

Cole, I know
this is your song,

but it just
doesn't sound like you.

Linda thinks it does.

♪.With nothing to do

You could put it
in the new show
you're working on.

♪.Give to you
what you give to me

Why not?

Because it doesn't
sound like me.

♪.Love forever true

(ALL APPLAUDING)

Bravo!

Oh, my goodness,
could you be
any more wonderful?

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Come in.

Hello.

Hi.

I was lying in my bed
just now, thinking

I don't want to stay
in that room.

I want to stay here tonight,
is that all right?

Of course it is, darling.
Is everything all right?

Are you... Are you lonely?

No, no, no, no,
I'm, I'm fine.

Um, it's just that, um...

Well, it's funny,
this afternoon, I was...

I was watching you

and watching you
watching the Murphys' kids,

and I thought
about how happy we are
and how much we have

and then I thought
about the Murphys
and how happy they are

and, uh, I think
we could be...

I mean, we are as happy
as the Murphys,

but we could be
happy in the way
that the Murphys

are happy
if we had what
the Murphys have.

They bring them
so much happiness.

I'm so glad I'm not trying
to write this as a song.

It would be
a beautiful serenade.

(CHUCKLING)

Well, um...

Uh, champagne,
or how do you
wanna play this?

Comedy, tragedy?
Musical comedy, farce?

Why don't we just play?

Good idea.

JACK:
♪.Night and day

♪.You are the one

♪.Only you beneath the moon

♪.And under the sun

♪.Whether near to me or far

♪.It's no matter,
darling, where you are

♪.I think..

Oh! Stop!

It's impossible,
I just can't do it.

Cole. Coley.

He is only an actor,
but he still maybe right.

He's tried it seven times.

The song is a problem.

Now, I told you,
we should have given it
to Astaire.

Beard,
the song is not a problem,
it's a challenge.

All right? Just give me
a moment, all right?

Jack, Jack, dear boy,

what can I do to help?

Anything, just name it.

Write another song.

Oh, God, that cuts me
right to the quick.

I know it's god-awful,
but it's the best I can do.

And we open in three days.

Look, Mr. Porter,
the song goes

so high and so low,
it is impossible.

It's not impossible.
Jack, I wrote it
with you in mind.

I know you've got it
in your voice.

I can sing it,
and I have
a range of three notes.

Where did you
come up with it?

Well, I get all my ideas
from a little Chinese man
in Poughkeepsie.

Listen, you can sing this.

The problem is,
you're not having
any fun.

Just don't think
about the melody.

Just think
about the words.

It's about obsession.

It's about being in love.

You've been in love?

All right,
obsess about it.

Just sing it with me.

Think about the lyrics
and just look at me.

One more time. Jimmy?

♪.Like the beat, beat, beat
of the tom-tom

BOTH:
♪.When the jungle
shadows fall

♪.Like the tick, tick, tock
of the stately clock

♪.As it stands
against the wall

It's relentless,
it's obsessive.

♪.Like the drip, drip, drip
of the raindrops

♪.When the summer shower
is through

♪.So a voice within me
keeps repeating

♪.You, you, you

♪.Night and day

♪.You are the one

♪.Only you beneath the moon

♪.And under the sun

That's beautiful.

♪.Whether near to me or far

♪.It's no matter,
darling, where you are

♪.I think of you

♪.Night and day

Jimmy, try "E" flat.

♪.Day and night

♪.Why is it so

♪.That this longing for you

♪.Follows wherever I go?

♪.In the roaring
traffic's boom

♪.In the silence
of my lonely room

♪.I think of you

JACK:
♪.Night and day

♪.Night and day

♪.Under the hide of me

♪.There's an,
oh, such a hungry yearning

♪.Burning inside of me

♪.And this torment
won't be through

♪.Till you let me
spend my life

♪.Making love to you

♪.Day and night

♪.Night and day

Bravo. Bravo.

ELDERLY COLE:
I never believed in anything,

least of all myself,
until Linda.

She restored me
to myself.

And I gave her back

me.

(COLE CHUCKLES)

Hardly payment in kind.

COLE:
Irving swears
that The Times critic

was dancing all the way
up the aisle.

Of course,
our esteemed producer

was still standing
in the front row, applauding.

(CHUCKLING)
Yes.

Oh, darling.

No triumph
complete without this.
Thank you.

You're welcome.
Let's not be late.

Well, actually,
I'm gonna ride with Monty
if it's all right with you.

He says
the London producers
are dying to talk to me

about the West End transfer.

Is it all right
if I join you later?

Well, can't you speak
with him at the party?

Oh, no business
at the party, only fun.

It's all right,
I'll be there soon.

All right.

Bye-bye.

COLE:
Beard, you know,
you're very dear to me,

always have been,
but these opening
night gifts of yours

are becoming more
and more intricate.

It's not as elegant
as one of Linda's
cigarette cases, I know,

but I believe
it may be better suited

to the daring
side of your nature.

Oh, Monty, you've always
been so solicitous

vis-a-vis my nature.
You pamper me.

I have to, my boy.
Nature is a nasty bitch.

If nature were fair,
I'd be Marlene Dietrich.

♪.If you wake up and dream

♪.Life will suddenly seem
as gay as it used to be

♪.Never mind what they say
let your dreams dream away

♪.And you'll still be alive
when they're dead♪

Your words, Coley.

Yes, Monty, but it's a song,
it's not a call to arms.

Arms weren't
what I had in mind.

I wanted to
tell you privately

how much all your attention
did for me.

And Night and Day,
how much it means to me.

From here on,
you two will have
to improvise.

I'm gonna find
some trouble of my own
in the ramble.

(MONTY SPEAKING FRENCH)

(COACH DOOR CLOSING)

(HORSE NEIGHING)

Well, Jack,

shall we have a cigarette?

(PIANO PLAYING)

(DOOR CLOSING)

Good morning.

This is something new.

To be inconsiderate,
to ignore your obligations.

(WHISPERING)
I know.

I'm so sorry,
I really am.
That was unforgivable.

Cole, you disappointed
a lot of people last night.

The London producers
were there.

Some Hollywood
people were most anxious
to speak with you.

I don't want to
go to Hollywood,
and I don't want to fight.

I don't want to fight.

And I don't want to blame.

Thank you for that, dear.

But if things are
gonna be different,

I'd like to know.

I'll tell you
as soon as I know.

GABE:
You must have known already.

I got the ending.

ELDERLY COLE:
I didn't know how much
my happiness would hurt us.

We couldn't
hear the songs
the same way anymore.

Suddenly the lyrics
all sounded like code.

FEMALE PERFORMER:
♪.In olden days,
a glimpse of stocking

♪.Was looked on as
something shocking

♪.Now heaven knows

♪.Anything goes

♪.Good authors, too,
who once knew better words

♪.Now only use
four-letter words

♪.Writing prose

♪.Anything goes

♪.If saying your prayers
you like

They love your song.

♪.If green pears you like

♪.If green pears you like

♪.If old chairs you like

♪.If old chairs you lik

Don't you?

♪.If backstairs you like

♪.If love affairs you like

♪.If love affairs you like

♪.If love affairs you like

♪.With young bears you like

♪.Why, nobody will oppose

♪.So though I'm not
a great romancer

♪.I know that
I'm bound to answer

♪.When you propose

♪.Anything goes

Ellin says Irving
is having a great run
up there in Hollywood.

The Gershwin's are there...

Do you want me to leave
at the top of my game?

♪.If old hymns you like

♪.If old hymns you like

♪.If bare limbs you like

♪.If bare limbs you like

♪.If Mae West you like

♪.If Mae West you like

♪.Or me undressed you lik

I'll give this to you now
in case

Monty has more producers
for you to visit.

♪.The set that's smart
is intruding on nudist parties

♪.in studios

♪.Anything goes

♪.Anything goes

♪.Anything goes

By the way,
do you want one?

No, thank you.

Oh, that's beautiful.
From Linda?

Yeah, of course,
opening night.

Linda must be keeping
Cartier in business
all by herself.

She does spoil me.
I don't deserve it.

No, you probably don't.

Which reminds me,
how's Linda?

COLE:
She's all right.

A bit more fragile than usual,
but all right. How's Patrick?

Well, there's
a doctor in Zurich
who may give us more time.

GERALD:
They don't give you much hope
with tuberculosis.

So sorry.

Does Linda know?
She hasn't said anything.

Yeah.

GERALD:
She said, "We live in castles
built on sand."

I just think
that life has been
one great carnival

and now we're teetering
on the high wire.

Yes, but you've got Sara
to catch you,
and I have Linda.

Ever wonder who's there
to catch them?

♪.When they begin

♪.The beguine

♪.It brings back the sound

♪.Of music so tender

♪.It brings back a night

♪.Of tropical splendor

♪.It brings back a memory

♪.Evergreen

♪.I'm with you once more

♪.Under the stars

♪.And down by the shore

♪.An orchestra's playing

♪.And even the palms

♪.Seem to be swaying

♪.When they begin

♪.The beguine

♪.To live it again

♪.Is past all endeavor

♪.Except when that tune

♪.Clutches my heart

♪.And there we are

♪.Swearing to love forever

♪.Promising never

♪.Never to part

♪.What moments divine

♪.What rapture serene

♪.Till clouds came along
to disperse

♪.The joys we had tasted

♪.And now when I hear
people curse

♪.The chance that was wasted

♪.I know but too well

♪.What they mean

♪.So don't let them begin

♪.The beguine

♪.Let the love
that was once a fire

♪.Remain an amber

♪.Let it sleep
like the dead desire

♪.I only remember

♪.When they begin

♪.The beguine

♪.When they begin

♪.The beguine

I am so terribly sorry,
darling.

I know how late I must be.

Late?

Linda,
you missed the whole thing.

I misplaced
the cigarette case.

I'd rather have had you.

It would have been
bad luck.

To hell with luck.

ELDERLY COLE:
This feels very wrong.

I don't like bringing up
this whole thing.

It happened and it was over,
and that was that.

We never brought it up again.

Finished, done.

Done, maybe. Finished?

I won't have it.

It's not your choice.

Anyway, I hope you like it.

Linda,
what were you thinking?

You wouldn't...

You wouldn't have lost it.

(CHUCKLES)

I had hoped not.

What are you
talking about?

Nothing!

Absolutely nothing.
Definitively nothing.

Shall we go now?

I would hate to
compound the felony

by making us late
for the party.

That would be terrible,
dreadful.

A tragedy too great
to bear.

(GASPS)

God, Linda,
what's happened?

I, uh...

Nothing, just a small thing.
It's just not like

being late
or missing an opening.

A very small thing

That stopped growing.

My sweet girl, I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry.

I didn't want
to tell you like this.

I just went to the doctor,
and he said I should rest,
and it got so late.

I'm sorry.

I wanted it so, Cole.

I wanted it for us.

I know. I know.

(SOBBING)

I want to take you home now.
All right?

I don't want to go home.

I don't even feel like
we have a home.

Then we'll find a new one.

We'll get out of town,
we'll travel.
We'll...we'll...

We'll find a new place.

Some place good for you
and good for me.

If everyone's moved
to Hollywood,

then we'll go there, too.
We'll try it.

We'll make a fresh start.

Let's just get
the doctor in tonight,

just to make sure
you're all right.

No more doctors.

(SIGHS)

I already know
I'm not all right.

Linda, then it wasn't
meant to be, that's all.

So, fine,
we'll be all right.

We'll be just fine
with what was meant to be.

That's you and that's me.

That's what was meant to be.

(SOBBING)

I love you, Linda Porter.

I love you so much.

COLE:
Okay, darling,
now, don't cheat.

It's not in my nature
to cheat.

All right, okay.
But I will pinch
if pushed to it.

All right, all right.
Ready?

I'm ready.

Oh, my goodness.

Is it all right?

No, I'd like something
a little bigger, please.

It's Hollywood, darling,
we do things big out here.

LINDA:
This is beautiful.
Look at the bow.

COLE:
Richard!

Let me show you the inside.

MAYER:
Well, all of metro

is proud to have you
as part of our family, Cole.

COLE:
You said that, L.B.
Thank you, I appreciate it.

I wanted to tell you again,
just to be sure you know.

We know you'll be happy here.

I'm already happy.

Swell. That makes me happy,
you're happy.

You know who else
makes me happy?

Irving Berlin.

Every song Irving Berlin
writes, I love. You know why?

Because his songs sound like
what people who aren't clever

say to each other
when they're in love.

Real love songs.

Not clever love songs.

Could you write
real love songs?

When you write funny songs,
I want funny-funny,
not clever-funny.

Could you do that for me?

Huh?

GABE:
You're stronger
if you're not angry.

Tickle their ribs
as you slide in the knife.

Try it.

♪.I'll remember forever
when I was but three

♪.Mama, who was clever,
remarking to me

♪.If, son,
when you're grown up

♪.You want everything nice

♪.I've got your future sewn up
if you take this advice

♪.Be a clown

♪.Be a clown

♪.All the world
loves a clown

♪.Act the fool,
play the calf

♪.And you'll always
have the last laugh

♪.Wear the cap and the bells

♪.And you'll rate
with all the great swells

♪.If you become a doctor,
folks'll face you with dread

♪.If you become a dentist,

♪.they'll be glad
when you're dead

♪.You'll get a bigger hand

♪.if you can stand
on your head

ALL:
♪.Be a clown,
be a clown, be a clown

♪.Be a clown

ALL:
♪.Be a clown

♪.All the world

ALL:
♪.Loves a clown

♪.Show 'em tricks

ALL:
♪.Tell 'em jokes

♪.And you'll only stop
with top folks

♪.Be a crack jackanapes

♪.And they'll imitate you
like apes

♪.Why be a great composer
with your rent in arrears?

♪.Why be a major poet
and you'll owe it for years

♪.When crowds
will pay to giggle

♪.if you wiggle your ears?

ALL:
♪.Be a clown, be a clown,
be a clown

(ALL CHEERING)

♪.Be a clown, be a clown

♪.All the world
loves a clown

♪.If you just make them roar

♪.Watch your
mountebank account soar

♪.Wear a painted mustache

♪.And you're sure
to make a big splash

♪.A college education,
I should never propose

♪.A bachelor's degree

♪.won't even keep you
in clothes

♪.But millions you will win
if you can spin on your nose

ALL:
♪.Be a clown, be a clown,
be a clown

(ALL CHEERING)

♪.Give 'em quips

ALL:
♪.Give 'em quips

♪.Give 'em fun

ALL:
♪.Give 'em fun

♪.And they'll pay
to say you're A-one

♪.If you become a farmer,
you've the weather to buck

♪.If you become a gambler,

♪.you'll be stuck
with your luck

♪.But, Jack, you'll never lack
if you can quack like a duck

Quack, quack, quack.

ALL:
♪.Be a clown

♪.Be a clown

♪.Be a clow

Jesus, though,
it was a relief
just to have fun

and do something trite
and not care a damn

and get paid a hundred times
what you'd be paid
for something good.

♪.I love you under my ski

MONTY:
They'll never know
the difference.

What's it going to be called?

What's the dreariest
title ever, eh?

I bet Coley $5

that he could never
write a song called
I Love You.

Get your money out.
I'm telling you,

Louis B. Mayer
is going to love this.

He's going to weep.

COLE:
Uh, I need a time of year.
A month, a month, a month.

All right, April.
June.

Perfect cliche, April.

♪."I love you"
hums the April breeze

♪.I love you under my skin

(MONTY CHUCKLING)

♪.I love you

♪.Is it a sin?

Certainly not.

♪."I love you"

♪.Hums the April breeze

♪."I love you"

♪.Echo the hills

♪."I love you"

♪.The golden dawn agrees

♪.As once more she sees

♪.Daffodils

♪.It's spring again

♪.And birds
on the wing again

♪.Start to sing again

♪.The old melody

♪."I love you"

♪.That's the song of songs

♪.And it all belongs
to you and me♪

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)

(AUDIENCE CHEERING)

♪.It was just

♪.One of those things

♪.Just one of those
crazy flings

MRS. MAYER:
It's a real pearl.

Go ahead, dear, take it.

It's tiny, but trust me,
it's still the biggest thing

you can get
your fingers around
in this crowd.

You'll make
big bucks on this.

That's swell.

It's something,
isn't it, hmm?

Yes, it's lovely.
It's lovely.

It's so, uh, imaginative
to actually have the party
at the studio.

Is absolutely
everything in Hollywood
connected to movies?

(LAUGHING)
Everything good.

That's why we're trying
to coax Cole into
permanent residency, you know?

How would half
of every year be?

I think
Hollywood's fantastic,
it's like living on the moon.

Or 20,000 leagues
under the sea.

(CHUCKLING)

♪.When we started
painting the town

Can you believe this?

Linda, Hollywood was
your idea, not mine.

Now you're acting like
it's the worst place
on earth.

I had thought that
the change of weather
might be good for us both.

I had no idea how hot
the climate would really be.

The climate is good
for growing flowers.

Everything grows wild, Cole.

And the pickings
are far too easy.

♪.Now and then
it was great fun

♪.But it was just
one of those things♪

Mr. Porter, how are you?

Oh, Mr. Nelson.

What you did with that song
is just splendid.

I'd love to introduce you
to my wife.

Cole,

I hope we could
coax you into a song.

ALL: Yes.

Be right back.

Good song.

Thank you.

There's a plan for later.

Ooh, Linda's being
very prickly tonight,
but, um, I'll try to get away.

Have you got
plenty of company lined up?

Good company, I promise.

COLE:
Thank you all. Thank you.

(CHUCKLING)
This is, uh, indeed
an honor and a surprise.

Um, obviously L.B. wants
you all to get home early,

that's why
he's asked me to sing.

So here goes.

♪.Before you leave
these portals

♪.To meet
less fortunate mortals

♪.There's just
one final message

♪.I would give to you

♪.Now you all
have learned reliance

♪.On the sacred teachings
of science

♪.So I hope through life
you never will decline

♪.In spite of
philistine defiance

♪.To do what all
good scientists do

♪.Experiment

♪.Make it your motto
day and night

♪.Experiment

♪.It will lead you
to the light

♪.If this advice
you'll only employ

♪.The future can offer you
infinite joy

♪.And merriment

♪.Experiment

♪.And you'll se

Goodnight.

Thank you.

(ALL APPLAUDING)

What a marvelous song.

I don't know it, do you?

Intimately.

You seem very happy, dear.

COLE:
I am, darling.
I wish you were.

(COUGHING)

Excuse me.

The springs
will take care of that.

I was actually thinking
of going to Arizona.

It's so much further.

I don't mind.

I expect I'll be gone
by the time you come home.

♪.Love for sale

♪.Appetizing young love

♪.For sale

♪.Love that's fresh
and still unspoiled

♪.Love that's only
slightly soiled

♪.Love

♪.For sale

♪.Who

♪.Will buy?

♪.Who would like to sample

♪.My supply?

♪.Who's prepared
to pay the price

♪.For a trip to paradise?

♪.Love

♪.For sale

♪.Let the poets pipe of love

♪.In their childish way

♪.I know every type of love

♪.Better far than they

♪.If you want
the thrill of love

♪.I've been through
the mill of love

♪.Old love, new love

♪.Every love but true love

♪.Love for sale

♪.Appetizing young love

♪.For sale

♪.If you want
to buy my wares

♪.Follow me
and climb the stairs

♪.Love

♪.For sal

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

Aren't there always copies
of those sorts
of photographs anyway?

Cole wanted
a set for himself.

These are not
blackmail pictures,
Linda, they're...

Mrs. Porter.

They were taken
for recreational purposes.

Cole has a heedless appetite
for life.

I'm sure we agree
he needs to be protected.

You became devoted
so very quickly, Mr. Reed.

He is, uh, so easy to love.

Beyond devotion,
what are your ambitions?

I have thought
of my own theatrical agency.

It would be
a company that would

keep their
clients' best interests
close to heart, always.

As you and I do Cole's.

Of course.
And how many backers
do you require?

Only one, Mrs. Porter.

Just let me know how much.

I'll leave these with you.

You don't sweat, do you?
Not a drop.

I don't believe
in wasting my resources.

Goodbye, Linda.

♪.It's the wrong song
in the wrong style

♪.Though your smile is lovely,
it's the wrong smile

♪.It's not her smile,
but such a lovely smile

♪.But it's all right
with me♪

Welcome home.

Aren't you pleased?

About the roses?

Yes.

They're glorious.
Are they for me?

Who else?

One never knows.

What's wrong, Linda?

Your friend Bobby Reed
has been to see me

with his nefarious portfolio.

Yes, he told me.

He told you?
Yes.

I paid him, too, you know.

No, I didn't know.

Yes, he's an...
An ambitious fellow.

It's all right.

I don't think
it's all right, Cole.

I think it's disgusting.

He's exploiting both of us.

Well, yes.

I like to look at it
as a kind of luxury tax.

A luxury tax?

What an extraordinary thing
to say.

Do you have any idea
how much you've changed?

How much your behavior
has changed?

You have put everything
that you've accomplished

with your music at risk.

Darling, my work
has never been better.

It's flourishing.
Even if we're not.

Your music comes
from your talent,
not from your behavior.

It's all the same thing.
I can't put

my talent here
and my behavior here

and my eating, sleeping,
and drinking habits.

It's all me.

I have never asked you
to change.

Just be discreet.

Linda,
I have never been discreet.

What is discretion

but dishonesty wrapped up
in a little good breeding?

I don't think you
want me to be discreet,
Linda,

I think you want me
to be different.

I am partially responsible
for all of this

because I have spoiled you,
I have indulged you.

But so has
the entire goddamned world.

And for what?

Just a little music.

ELDERLY COLE:
Linda hated being late
for anything.

And the next day
she was late for lunch.

I only had to hear
the clock strike

and look at her empty place
at the table to know
she was gone.

Gone back to Paris.

It's quite simple, really.

Two people who wanted too much
from each other.

(PHONE RINGING)

Porter residence.

Hold one moment.

Sir.

Not now.

It's urgent, sir.

Yes?

ELDERLY COLE:
All the money, all the music

had deflected reality
for so long,

I didn't know that
everything we had
was so fragile.

GABE:
Hold it loose, hold it tight.

Everything breaks.

I'm going to take them
to Paris next week.

All of this is just...

(SIGHS)
Got to get back
to a better place.

And, uh, it would be good
to see Linda.

(PIANO PLAYING)

IRVING:
Morning, Cole.

Are we the only ones up?

Our hostess just retired.

I've been up since 5:00.

(CHUCKLING)

Writing another hit,
I'm sure.

I wish it was that easy.

Nothing comes easy anymore.

And when it does, it's lousy.

I write better
in my own place
or the Murphys'.

I'm going to swear off
these house parties
until I finish this score.

Remind me I said that,
will you?

That melody sounds like
it could go somewhere.

Yeah, like out for a drink.

Have you heard from Linda?

No.

No. I've written, I've wired,
I've called. Nothing.

I'm sorry, Cole,
I'm really sorry.

Maybe, uh, you know,
with time...

It'll take more than time.

(CLEARS THROAT)

I, uh...

I'll be back
before breakfast.

(WIND WHISTLING)

Just seemed so much
to ask children to bear.

How long will you stay?

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

No idea.

(HORSE NEIGHING)

(COUGHING)

(HORSE NEIGHING)

(SCREAMING)

Let's go inside,
it's getting cold.

(HORSE SNUFFLING)

(NEIGHING)

(SCREAMING)

(NEIGHING)

COLE:
You see how far I'll go
to get you back?

I think you've gone too far
this time,

but I ought to be
used to it by now.

MOORHEAD:
I'm afraid his right leg
should be amputated.

Perhaps the left as well.
There's really no alternative.

If you amputate his legs,
you will cut out his pride.

You'll break his spirit,
he would never work again.

He'll have nothing
without his music,
it's the essence of him.

He'd have nothing
to live for.

He would have his life,
his friends, you.

Nothing. He would just be
living out his death.

You're asking a lot of him.

We are accustomed to asking
a lot of one another.

So what did the sawbones say?

You get to keep
the old things.

And he expects you to walk,
and so do I.

But only if I can walk to you.

As far as Williamstown?

Williamstown?

Massachusetts.
I found a very pretty home.

LINDA:
It's on a hill,
it has a work space.

Thinking of buying it.

LINDA:
A little bump.

Oh.

All right.

Now?
Yes.

COLE:
Oh, a grand piano.

That is grand.

(CHUCKLES)

That's not quite right.

So shall I leave you to it?

Guess you'd better.

God, I can't work the pedal...

Can't work the pedals, dear.

(PLAYING PIANO)

(EXCLAIMS)

Goddamn it!

(SOBBING)

COLE:
I can't work the pedals!

GABE:
And what did it take

to finally work the pedals?

Oh, a few years.

A pharmacopoeia of pills.

A reservoir of scotch
and 20 more operations.

Nonstop fun.

But over time,
you got five shows
up and running.

Up? Yes. Running? Barely.

COLE:
At least,
according to the critics.

"Not up to Mr. Porter's
usual standards,"

was the refrain.

So when Hollywood
finally called again?

Oh, I was on the train
before the second ring.

PRESENTER:
He is the same.

One of Yale's sons
of whom we are all proud.

Cole Porter.

♪.There's an,
Oh, such a hungry yearning

♪.Burning inside of me

♪.And its torment
won't be through

♪.Till you let me
spend my life making love

♪.To you

♪.Day and night

♪.Night and day

If I can survive this movie,
I can survive anything.

And you shall,
darling, beautifully,
like everything else.

Hmm.

Thank you.

LINDA:
The movie will do very well,
and you'll be encouraged.

COLE:
I wonder,
it seems like every time

they operate, I lose songs
as well as blood.

Remind me to call
the studio and tell them

how much we
"absolutely loved the movie."

LINDA:
Naturally.

(GROANS)

Sorry. I'm all right.

Why on earth
does Linda come back
to Cole anyway?

Because he's Cary Grant.

And she misses the music,
as do I.

I must say,
going down in history
as Cary Grant is not too bad.

COLE: Not for a
boy from Indiana.

LINDA: We should be
grateful to them, they
found us a happy ending.

COLE: Ah, yes,
happy endings.

Well, you don't get
many of those, do you,
in Hollywood?

COLE: So this promises
what, surgery
number 25?

Twenty Six.

Oh, good God.
And how long will I have
to wear the cast this time?

A few months,
we'll see how you mend.

What's that?

It's Linda.

It's gotten that bad now?

Even if she'd agree,
I don't think
surgery would help.

The lungs are too damaged.

Dr. Moorhead,
are you saying
that Linda is dying?

God,
what a swell party this is.

♪.Four weeks,
you rehearse and rehearse

♪.Three weeks,
and it couldn't be worse

♪.One week,
will it ever be right?

♪.Then out of the hat,
it's that big first night

♪.The overture
is about to start

♪.You cross your fingers
and hold your heart

♪.It's curtain time
and off we go

♪.Another opening
of another show♪

Miss Morrison,
the line is "away we go,"
not "off we go," dear.

You couldn't manage
to make me hear you before,

and now that I can hear you,
you've got it wrong.

So shall we do it again?

Let's pick it up,
dust it off, and get it right.

The tempo...
The tempo was good.

All right, everyone,
let's go.

♪.One week,
will it ever be right?

♪.Then out of the hat,
it's that big first night

♪.The overture
is about to start

♪.You cross your fingers
and hold your heart

♪.It's curtain time
and away we go

♪.Another opening

♪.Just another opening
of another show♪

Very good.
Thank you. Thank you, all.

Carry on. And chorus,

keep those consonants crisp.

Don't want the audience
to think you're saying,

"An annoying opening
for an ugly show."

They'll come
to that conclusion
on their own.

Please stop that knocking.

Mr. Porter.

What?

Your wife sent me
to fetch you.

Fetch me for what?

BILL: For tea.

I don't like tea.

It's just a few steps.
She's waiting.

Fine, come in.
Fetch me, for Christ's sake.

Who are you, anyway?

Bill, Bill Wrather.

Bill rather? Rather what?

Oh.

Bill Wrather.
Yes, you're Linda's, uh,

decorating wizard. Yes.

It's a great pleasure
for me, Mr. Porter.

Oh, the pleasure is mine.

Can I?
No, no.

Are you sure?

No. Lots of practice.

(SIGHS)

I will take an arm, actually.
Thank you.

Well, I'll be making my way.

Linda, a pleasure as always.

LINDA:
Indeed.

I'll see you soon.

And Cole,
that tune you were playing
was just beautiful.

I can't wait
to hear that in the show.

Goodbye now.

LINDA:
Safe drive.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

Isn't he delightful?

Lovely.

We've become
such fast friends.

I was hoping that
you might as well.

He'd be a good companion
for you.

Linda?

I don't want you
to be lonely.

(LINDA COUGHING)

I'm worried about you.

You don't need to worry
about me, or your show,

it's all taken care of.

I'm in God's hands,
the show is in yours.

I do wish it were
the other way round, though.

Give me that cigarette.

♪.Strange, dear

♪.But true, dear

♪.When I'm close
to you, dear

♪.The stars fill the sk

This really needs
a proper singer.

I really can't
do it justice.

Wait till opening night,
hear it sung well.

I think it sounds fine
right now.

And I won't be there, dear.

What are you talking about?
Why wouldn't you be?

You know the doctors, honey,
they're so boring.

I don't think I would
add very much to it.

I'm sure it will be
a great occasion.

It won't be any occasion
if you're not there.

Darling,
Bill will be with you.

He'll help you.

I wrote this for you.

What's the point of doing it
if you're not gonna be there?

Well, that's why I want you
to play it for me.

All the way through.

All right.

I won't do it justice,
but I'll do it.

(COUGHING)

♪.Strange, dear,
but true, dear

♪.When I'm close
to you, dear

♪.The stars fill the sky

♪.So in love with you am I

♪.Even without you

♪.My arms fold about you

♪.You know, darling, why

♪.So in love with you am I

♪.In love with
the night mysterious

♪.The night when
you first were there

♪.In love
with my joy delirious

Wait, wait, wait.

Are you all right?

A few people
may have been carried
out of my shows,

but no one's
ever been carried in.

♪.So taunt me and hurt me

♪.Deceive me, desert me

♪.I'm yours till I die

♪.So in love

♪.So in love

♪.So in love with you,
my love

Think of Linda a little
and applaud a lot.

♪.In love with
the night mysterious

♪.The night when
you first were there

♪.In love

♪.With my joy delirious

♪.When I knew
that you could care

♪.So taunt me

♪.And hurt me

♪.Deceive me

♪.Desert me

♪.I'm yours till I die

♪.So in love

♪.So in love

♪.So in love with you

♪.My love, am I

♪.In love with
the night mysterious

♪.The night when
you first were there

♪.In love
with my joy delirious

♪.When I knew
that you could care

♪.So taunt me

♪.And hurt me

♪.Deceive me

♪.Desert me

♪.I'm yours till I die

♪.So in love

♪.So in love

♪.So in love

♪.My love

♪.Am

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)

MAN: Bravo!

MAN: Bravo!

(AUDIENCE CHEERING)

Sorry, we have to move on.

Please, please,
let me enjoy this.

It took two years
to get the backers
interested in this show.

No one wanted
anything to do with it,
they thought I was finished.

We have to move on.

(SIGHS)

Very well.

We make quite a pair,
don't we?

(COLE SIGHS)

We're still
les colporteurs of Paris.

Plying our humble trade.

I could hear the score.

Darling, it's a goody.

It's all about Paris.

Brings back fond memories.

Those were fine days.

Yes, they were.

And we were fine.

We were fine.

Finding each other.

Taking care of each other.

I have a little something
for you.

It's a whole new flower.

A gentleman in Spain
did it up for me.

It's a hybrid
of two varieties of rose

thought to be
completely incompatible.

Yet look at it, it's perfect.

The Linda Porter Rose.

Exquisite.

It's just a pale reflection
of our life together.

It wasn't all beautiful.

You were always
my life to be.

I remember that song.

It was about you.

They were all about you.

Not all of them.

But some, I hope.

How I have loved you, Cole.

I don't know
how much longer I can stay.

Would you mind terribly
if I went just a little early?

♪.Every time

♪.We say goodbye

♪.I die a little

♪.Every time

♪.We say goodbye

♪.I wonder why a little

♪.Why the gods above me

♪.Who must be in the know

♪.Think so little of me

♪.They allow you to go

♪.When you're near

♪.There's such an air

♪.Of spring about it

♪.I can hear

♪.A lark somewhere

♪.Begin to sing about it

♪.There's no love song finer

♪.But how strange the change

♪.From major to minor

♪.Every time

♪.We say

♪.Goodbye

♪.Goodbye

BILL: Sara.

Hello, darling.

Gerald.

How is he?

BILL: Cole is already seated.

He doesn't want anyone
to feel awkward about the leg.

GERALD:
He would still have the damn
thing if Linda were here.

And Monty was by
for a visit.

He asked to be remembered,
of course.

Good old Monty.

Hmm.

Noted.

So, Cole, when are
we gonna get another
lyric from you, huh?

I haven't the wit
nor the will to
write any more.

Cole, you can write
from everything
you remember.

You've had
the most fascinating life.

Oh, Sara, Sara.

(SIGHING)
Memories.

(CHUCKLING)
It's like the phantom pains
I get in my missing leg.

They're not real
and they hurt too much.

I'm a toy balloon
that's fated soon to pop.

Cole, please. Don't.

COLE:
Oh, my God.

My dear friends,
I'm boring you.

Let us repair
to the living room
for some goodbyes

and some coffee
and some traveling
music, shall we?

COLE:
Bill is all packed,

and you all have
a long drive ahead of you.

The invitation
was for the weekend.

Let's pretend it's Sunday.

We'll be right there.

GERALD:
Sara.

All right, dear.

I wish you'd let me
stay with you, Cole.

I want to stay.

(CHUCKLING)
Bill, Bill.

Bill, please, let me at least
try to do something noble,
all right?

Uh, what I'm trying to do
is best for both of us.

Well, then can't both of us
decide, not just you?

My sweet boy,
there's nothing for you here.

Come on now,
get the wheelchair.

♪.It's the wrong time

♪.And the wrong place

♪.Though your face
is charming

♪.It's the wrong face

♪.It's not her face

That was evil. I'm sorry.

I think you're trying
very hard to misbehave.

And you used to be
a better actor.

Oh, I used to be better
at a lot of things.

♪.At words poetic,
I'm so pathetic

♪.That I always
have found it best

♪.Instead of getting them
off my chest

♪.To let them rest,
unexpressed

♪.You're the top

♪.You're the coliseum

♪.You're the to

(SIGHS)

Go on, get out of here.

Cole.

♪.Get outta town

Cole, by all means.

♪.Before it's too late,
my love

Take it easy,
old friend.

♪.Get outta town

♪.Be good to me please

♪.Why wish me harm?

SARA:
Take care of him.

♪.Why not retire to a farm

♪.And be contented to charm

♪.The birds off the trees

We love you.

Cole.

♪.It's done

♪.The little dream,
it's done

♪.So bid me a fond farewell,
we both had our fun

Cole.

♪.Was it Romeo
or Juliet who said

♪.When about to die

♪."Love is not all
peaches and cream"

♪.Little dream

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

♪.Goodbye

ELDERLY COLE:
Lonely, miserable, melancholy.

What a perfect musical finale.

Don't worry.

Never open on a ballad,
never end on one either.

(TRUMPET PLAYING)

♪.Do you hear that playing?

VOICES:
♪.Yes, we hear that playing

♪.Do you know who's playing?

VOICES:
♪.No, who is that playing?

♪.Well it's Gabriel,
Gabriel playing,

♪.Gabriel, Gabriel saying

♪."Will you be ready to go
when I blow my horn?"

ALL:
♪.Oh, blow, Gabriel, blow

♪.Go on and blow,
Gabriel, blow

♪.I've been a sinner,
I've been a scamp

♪.But now
I'm willing to trim my lamp

♪.So blow, Gabriel, blow

♪.Oh, I was low,
Gabriel, low

♪.Mighty low, Gabriel, low

♪.But now since
I have seen the light

♪.I'm good by day
and I'm good by night

♪.So blow, Gabriel, blow

♪.Go on and blow,
Gabriel, blow

♪.I want to join
your happy band

♪.And play all day
in the promised land

♪.So blow, Gabriel, blow

♪.Blow, Gabriel, blow

♪.Blow, Gabriel, blow

♪.Blow, Gabriel, blow

♪.Blow, Gabriel,
blow, blow, blow

♪.I want to join
your happy band

♪.And play all day
in the promised land

♪.So blow, Gabriel, blow

♪.Blow, Gabriel, blow

♪.Blow, Gabriel, blow

(GROANS)

(SIGHS)

♪.In the still of the night

♪.As I gaze from my window

♪.At the moon in its flight

♪.My thoughts
all stray to you

♪.In the still of the night

♪.While the world
is in slumber

♪.Oh, the times
without number

♪.Darling, when I say to you

BOTH:
♪."Do you love me

♪."As I love you?

♪."Are you my life to be

♪."My dream come true?"

♪.Or will this dream of mine

♪.Fade out of sight

♪.Like the moon

♪.Growing dim on the rim

♪.Of the hill, in the chill

♪.Still of the night?

♪.Like the moon

♪.Growing dim on the rim

♪.Of the hill, in the chill

♪.Still of the night?

♪.At words poetic,
I'm so pathetic

♪.That I always
have found it best

♪.Instead of getting them
off my chest

♪.To let them rest,
unexpressed

♪.I hate parading
my serenading

♪.As I'll probably miss
a bar

♪.But if this ditty
is not so pretty

♪.At least it'll tell you
how great you are

♪.You're the top

♪.You're the coliseum

♪.You're the top

♪.You're the Louvre museum

♪.You're the melody
from a symphony by Strauss

♪.You're a Bendel bonnet,
a Shakespeare sonnet

♪.You're Mickey Mouse

♪.You're the Nile

♪.You're the tower of Pisa

♪.You're the smile

♪.On the Mona Lisa

♪.I'm a worthless check,
a total wreck, a flop

♪.But if baby I'm the bottom,
you're the top

♪.You're romance

♪.You're the steppes
of Russia

♪.You're the pants
on a Roxy Usher

♪.I'm a lazy lout
that's just about to stop

♪.But if, baby,
I'm the bottom

♪.You're the to

♪.The night is young
the skies are clear

♪.So if you wanna go
walking, dear

♪.It's delightful,
it's delicious

♪.It's de-lovely

♪.I understand
the reason why

♪.You're sentimental
'cause so am I

♪.It's delightful,
it's delicious

♪.It's de-lovely

♪.You can tell at a glance

♪.What a swell night this is
for romance

♪.You can hear
dear mother nature

♪.Murmuring low,
"Let yourself go!"

♪.So please be sweet,
my chickadee

♪.And when I kiss you
just say to me

♪."it's delightful,
it's delicious

♪."it's delectable,
it's delirious

♪."it's dilemma,
it's de-limit

♪."It's deluxe,
it's de-lovely"♪

♪.But, that's why
birds do it

♪.Bees do it

♪.Even educated fleas do it

♪.Let's do it

♪.Let's fall in love

♪.In Spain,
the best upper sets do it

♪.Lithuanians and Letts
do it

♪.Let's do it

♪.Let's fall in love

♪.The Dutch
in old Amsterdam do it

♪.Not to mention the Finns

♪.Folks in Siam do it

♪.Think of Siamese twins

♪.Some Argentines
without means do it

♪.People say in Boston
even beans do it

♪.Let's do it

♪.Let's fall in lov

♪.You could have
a great career

♪.And you should,
yes, you should

♪.Only one thing
stops you, dear

♪.You're too good,
way too good

♪.If you want
a future, darling

♪.Why don't you get a past?

♪.'Cause that fatal moment's
coming at last

♪.We're all alone,
no chaperone

♪.Can get our number

♪.The world's in slumber

♪.Let's misbehave

♪.Every time

♪.We say goodbye

♪.I die a little

♪.Every time

♪.We say goodbye

♪.I wonder why a little

♪.Why the gods above me

♪.Who must be in the know

♪.Think so little of me

♪.They allow you to go

♪.When you're near

♪.There's such an air

♪.Of spring about it

♪.I can hear

♪.A lark somewhere

♪.Begin to sing about it

♪.There's no love song finer

♪.But how strange the change

♪.From major to minor

♪.Every time

♪.We say

♪.Goodbye

♪.Goodbye