Darkness Before Dawn (1993) - full transcript

(soft piano music)

- Morning.
- Morning.

- [Receptionist] Mary Ann,
why does he look familiar?

- Oh, you must stay up late.

He has that carpet store.

He does those
horrible commercials.

You know, I'll stand on my head,

give you a really good deal.

- You're right.

And my mother was worried
about the kind of people

I'd meet working at
a methadone clinic.



Half of these guys
could run for Congress.

- Think how much money we'd
make if we were into blackmail.

- Well, good idea,
I need new carpet.

- Hmm.

- [Receptionist] God, he's cute.

- Who's that?

- Your boyfriend.

- Hmm?

Guy, he's just friendly.

- He was never that
friendly to me.

- Morning, sunshine.

Fascinating, reads like one

of your finer
Airport paperbacks.

- I was checking your dosage.



- Come on, you were
looking at my picture.

I clean up pretty nice, huh?

- Are we going to
lower our dosage?

- Someday, you'll be
the first to know.

- Well, make your
contribution to society.

- You know, this is gonna
be such a romantic story

when we tell our grandkids.

- Just do it.

- You have never
told me your name.

- Maybe I like being
called sunshine.

It's Mary Ann.

- It's perfect.

- And you're from Kansas, right?

- Iowa.

- Same thing.

Don't go away

- Guy.

Um, can I ask you something?

- [Guy] Ask me anything.

- Um, do you have a girlfriend?

- No, well, I did
but we broke up.

Why?

- Would you like to go to
a movie with me sometime?

- Um, is that okay,
going out with a patient?

- Well, I wasn't gonna
put it in your chart.

- Are you sure you're from Iowa?

(soft music)

- [Guy] Hi.

- Hi.

- I saw your parking.

I can't let you see
what a mess my place is,

you'd lose all respect for me.

- What made you think I had any?

- Oh, sarcasm, hmm.

It's my favorite
thing in a woman.

Come on, let's go

- We have lots of time.

- Yeah, well, I'm a
forward moving type of guy.

- You look terrific.

- Thank you.

- Are you one of those
women who get offended

if I do open the
door or if I don't?

- I'm not one of those
women who get offended.

- That's a good thing.

Oh.

- What?

- Linda, what are
you doing here?

- I live here.

Did he mention that?

It slips his mind sometimes.

- Linda, this is Mary Ann.

She's a nurse at the
methadone clinic.

I couldn't get over there
today and she was kind enough

to drop my stuff off
for me on her way home

which I really appreciate.

Did I say that?

I was just seeing
the lady to her car.

I'll be up in a minute.

- You said you didn't
have a girlfriend

and you're living with somebody?

- I don't want to
be living with her.

I've been trying to break
it off for months now.

- Why don't you
call me when you do?

- No, look, I really
want to go out with you.

Um, let me clean this up
and I'll meet you over

at Lassos in a couple of hours?

- Oh, I don't know.

- [Guy] Come on, please

- It really bothers me
the way you're able to lie

at a moment's notice like that.

- Yeah, well, it's
my one true talent

so don't hold it against me.

Nine o'clock?

(country music)

You're here.

That's great.

I was afraid you might not be.

- I almost gave up on you.

- Never give up on me.

That's rule number one.

I hope this place isn't
too lowbrow for you.

- I don't have a
problem with lowbrow.

It's the other end that
makes me uncomfortable.

- Me too.

See, we're meant for each other.

I'm usually going to places

where I'm the only Mercedes
in the parking lot.

- I thought you
didn't have a car?

- I did til a few days ago.

450SL.

Nice car till I totaled it.

- What happened?

- Some guy cut me
off on the freeway.

I thought it was really
rude so I rammed him.

I guess I wasn't thinking
too clearly at the time.

I was in no mood to
deal with the cops

so I just got out and took off.

- You just left it?

- Hey, you don't think I
ended up in a methadone clinic

because I'm a sane person?

- No, I don't suppose you did.

I don't suppose you did.

- This is your daughter?

- [Mary Ann] Yeah, that's Jenny.

- She's cute.

You think she's too old for me?

- Oh, I think you're
probably about the same age.

- Yeah, yeah, talk tough.

You like me?

- Do I?

- I don't know.

Do you?

- Yeah.

Don't let it go to your head.

- No, just making sure you're
not after me for my money.

- Oh.
- Ho, ho.

What's so funny?

I own the biggest
clothing store in Vegas.

- You're losing the largest
clothing store in Vegas.

- Yeah, well, if you want
to get technical about it.

- [Mary Ann] Oh, you
sure find it amusing.

- I'm in a program.

What else do you want
from me, sunshine?

- You've been in the
program for three years

and you've never
lowered your dose once.

You're just substituting
methadone for heroin

on days you can't
find your dealer.

I may be from Iowa but
I didn't just fall off

the turnip truck, you know.

- Getting late, huh.

I guess I better
be calling a cab.

- I'm sorry, I didn't
mean to preach a sermon.

- No, you're entitled
to your opinion.

(dramatic music)

(gun firing)

- Can we watch something--

- Shh, this is the best part!

- What's so good about it?

- Mary Ann, go get
the potato chips.

- Give me the flashlight.

- [Sandra] How come the
Indians never get to win?

- [Boy] How can
you be so stupid?

- Oh no!
- Right, you did it!

- [Mary Anne] It
was an accident.

- So what we're
still gonna get it!

Mary Anne, don't do that!

- We have to see
how to get them out.

- He drives by here and
checks, I've seen it.

- So hurry!

- You guys be careful, if
there's even a crumb left,

Mom will see it.

- You should've thought of
that when you spilled 'em.

- John L. I tripped.

Why do you have to
be such a jackass?

- You swore, I'm gonna tell!
- Shh!

Quiet.

(door slamming)

(footsteps echoing)

- Who turned on the light?

I said who turned on the light!

Okay.

Every one of you
is gonna get it.

(belt snapping)

Let's go, John L.

- I did it.

I won't do it again, I promise.

None of my friends have
to keep their lights off.

- [Man] Friends don't
pay my electric bills.

(belt thwacking)

- [Mary Ann] Stop
it, stop it please!

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!

I won't do it again, I promise.

(doorbell ringing)

- [Guy] Hi.

- [Mary Ann] Hi.

- Okay, I haven't
been very serious

about cleaning up my act.

I paid a lot of lip service
to it but that's about it.

I don't know why.

Maybe I just haven't found
a good enough reason?

Can I tell you something?

And this is the truth.

You have been on my mind

since the very first
time I saw you.

I remember you were sitting
there in your white uniform,

sunlight on your hair.

You were so pretty.

So pure.

- Guy, don't make me out
to be some kind of saint.

- Yeah, well, I'll match
records with you any time.

See, what I'm saying
is that if it meant

that I could be with you,
I think I could do it.

I think I could.

Give me a chance.

Clean slate.

- Okay.

Clean slate.

- There's one other thing.

I can't go home.

See everything in that
apartment is about drugs.

That's what she's about

If the phone rings
that's what it's about.

It's been my whole
life for years

and I just don't trust
myself if I go back there.

I'd go to a motel but the
cab driver took my last dime.

- Okay.

You can sleep on the couch.

- I never imagined
it any other way.

(children chattering)

You're a great cook.

- Guy, it's a baloney sandwich.

- Yeah, but it's the
best baloney sandwich
I've ever eaten.

Jenny look!

Want a balloon?

- Can I?
- Yeah.

- Mommy, how long is
he gonna stay with us?

- [Mary Ann] I don't
know, we'll have to see.

- I like him.

- I know, so do I.

- Okay, I owe you one, man.
- Yeah, okay.

- See ya.
- Later.

- He's got them all!

Ha, ha, ha!

Here you go, princess.

- [Jenny] All right!

- Guy, I thought you were broke.

- Yeah, well, I know the guy.

- How?

- He sells more than balloons.

- Did you buy more
than balloons?

- Course not.

I made you promise, didn't I?

- You keep the
promises you make?

- I'll keep any promise
I ever make to you.

(soft music)

Hey sunshine.

Would you care to
join me on the sofa?

It's pretty comfy.

- That's not exactly
what I had in mind.

- So?

What'd you have in mind?

(soft music)

- Do you, Mary Ann, take
Guy to be your lawful

wedded husband, to
love and to cherish him

from this time forward,
for richer, for poorer,

in sickness and in health as
long as you both shall live?

- Oh, I do.

- [Justice Of The Peace]
By the power vested in me

by the state of Nevada, I
declare you husband and wife.

You may kiss the bride.

(crowd clapping)

(crowd gasping)

- Come on, everybody,
grab a glass.

- I don't know how much longer
this smile is gonna last.

- He seems okay.

A little hyper, but he's
probably just nervous

about getting married.

- So it doesn't bother you
that your sister-in-law

is marrying an
unemployed heroin addict?

- Former heroin addict.

- Yeah right.

- I want to propose
a toast, everybody.

To my bride and to my
beautiful daughter,

may we have many, many
happy years before Mary Ann

realizes what a big
mistake she's made.

- Oh no!

(crowd clapping)

(phones ringing)

- Here are the charts
for this morning.

- Already?

I don't know where
you worked before

but they were crazy
to let you leave.

- Private methadone clinic.

I was ready for a change.

- To a psych ward?

- Bastard to the
Bahamas was taken.

- Listen, Mr Hobbs
needs his Demerol.

Could you take care of that?

- Oh, I'm on my way.

Morning, Mr Hobbs.

(suspenseful music)

(dramatic music)

- [Women On P.A.] Dr
Michalson to cardiology.

Dr Michalson to cardiology.

- Ah!
- Hi!

- Oh Guy, you scared me.

- [Guy] I'm a scary guy.

- Are these for me?

- No, they're for Princess
Diana but I wanted you

to have a look at 'em first.

- Why did you do this?

- Because I love you.

- I love you too.

What did you have too
hawk to buy these?

- Nothing, I just lifted
'em from the gift shop.

- Oh Guy, you're kidding.

- I am kidding.

I got a job.

- Oh, oh, that's great!

- Don't get so excited.

It's in a movie theater, I'm
assistant manager trainee

which means I think I'm
in charge of scraping

the bubble gum off the
bottom of the seats.

- Oh.

Oh honey, I'm so proud of you.

It must be so hard after
running your own business.

- Yeah, well, recovering
heroin addict does cast

a certain pall on the
resume, but wait til you get

a load of me in my
little red vest.

- Oh, I can't wait.

- So how you like working here?

- Beats unemployment.

- Not by much.

Mr Conklin said you used to
own some big clothing store.

- Yep.

- So what happened?

- [Guy] Went out of business.

- Yeah, how come?

- Byron, my failure
in life is not exactly

my favorite topic
of conversation.

- I'm sorry, I was just curious.

Just surprised you couldn't
get a better job than this.

(phones ringing)

- Mary Ann, have you seen
the key to the pharmacy?

- No, is it missing?

- I can't find it.

This is really gonna
raise some hell.

- Maybe someone
left in the door.

I'll go look.

- [Woman On P.A.]
Dr Franklin, 5321.

Dr Franklin, 5321.

(suspenseful music)

Key was in the door

I'm just checking to make
sure that nothing's missing,

but it seems fine.

- I can't believe anybody
could be so careless.

You take your time.

Check everything

- I will.

(suspenseful music)

(rock music blaring)

- [Woman] Hi.

- Well.

Now, I've seen it all

- Dino, what are you doing here?

- I was in the neighborhood.

I had an urge for some
stale, overpriced popcorn.

Look at you, very sharp.

All you need now is a
monkey and a tin cup.

- Yeah, yeah, come
on, let me have it.

- You know, I heard
you were working here,

but I didn't believe it.

- It's not so bad.

A lot of stuff
caught up with me.

It was time to clean up my act.

- Yeah, well, whatever
it takes, huh?

- That's right.

- So, uh, is there
anything I can do for you?

- No.

I'm clean

I've been clean for six months.

- So you're a citizen.

I mean is one hit gonna kill ya?

- Guy.

I don't pay you to
gab with your friends.

- Ha, ha!

What are we in high school?

- Ignore him.

- Come on, show me
how clean the can is.

- Hey Deano, I just told you.

It's worth it to me, man.

I'm getting a little
honesty in my life.

- Guy, you got a
hearing problem?

- Hey, if you talk to him
like that for minimum wage,

this honesty, you can have it.

Hey, if you change your mind
you know where to find me.

(suspenseful music)

- Yes, just a second

Mary Ann, your landlady.

- Thanks.

Hello.

Really?

Well, I'm sure it's
been a mix up the bank.

If you'll put it through again.

Oh, well I'll look into it.

I'm sure it's just a mix-up.

Okay.

- Hi.

Sorry I'm late.

Some old lady, she
slipped and fell.

I had to write a whole novel
for the insurance company.

What's wrong?

- Where's the money, Guy?

- What money?

- My money.

The rent check bounced.

The lady at the bank
said that the money

in the savings account was gone.

She closed the
account a week ago.

- Mary Ann.

- It was almost $10,000, Guy.

Do you know how long it
took me to save that much?

It was for our future,
for Jenny's future.

And don't you think for a minute

that I don't know
what happened to that.

You come home at night
and you get in bed with me

and it's like everything's fine.

What did you think?

Did you think I wouldn't notice?

- I was gonna put it back.

- How?

You don't make enough money
to put gas in the car.

How you gonna put
back my life savings?

- I ran into this guy.

It was just gonna be one
time and before I knew it,

I was back in it all over again.

Look, my brother, Steve,
owes me some money.

Maybe I'll just go stay with
him for a few weeks, huh?

I'll tell him what happened
and we'll see what he can do.

- Fine.

- So then I'll come back
and I'll check myself

into a detox and I'll get clean.

- Oh, I know.

Clean slate.

(suspenseful music)

- [Boy] Mom, mom, can we
open the presents now?

- Can we just get started?

- Mary Ann, you know your
father, he won't let me

have anything to do
with the presents.

- He's taking forever.

(man whistling)

- [Man] All right,
where is everybody?

(children laughing)

(soft music)

Let's see.

Daryl.

- [Daryl] All right a big one.

- [Man] And this
one's for Sandra.

- Thanks.

What about Mary Ann?

- Well, didn't you get one?

Hmm.

I guess I forgot to
get you anything.

- What?

Well, you two can go shopping
for something tomorrow.

How's that?

(soft music)

- You can play with mine.

(dramatic music)

(doorbell ringing)

(doorbell ringing)

- [Mary Ann] Who is it?

- [Man] Police, open up.

- [Mary Ann] Oh.

- I'm Detective Bayer,
this is my partner.

- [Mary Ann] What is it?

- We're looking for Guy Grant.

May we look around?

- He, I...

He's not here.

I don't know where he is.

What's this--

- [Detective Bayer]
Are you Mrs Grant?

- [Mary Ann] Yes.

- You don't know
where your husband is?

- Well, we had a
fight and he left.

Can you tell me
what this is about?

- Someone cleaned out the safe

at the movie theater
over the weekend.

Your husband is the only
one with a combination.

- No.

- We have a warrant
for his arrest.

- Mommy, a man
came into my room.

Mommy, what's going on?

- Please.

- I don't get it.

You're the best employee
I've had in years.

I thought you wanted
to go somewhere.

I know you're too
smart to be mixed up

in something like this.

You've got a lovely family.

I mean is it worth
wrecking your life

to feel good for a few minutes?

- Mr Conklin, uh,
Guy already feels

really bad about what he did.

His brother lent us some money.

You said you would drop the
charges if we paid you back.

- All right.

You know, I don't know
if I'm doing you a favor

letting you think that you
can pull something like this

with no consequences.

Nadine, give me that Sergeant
Oakland on the phone.

- [Mary Ann] Finished
with your sandwich?

- Mm-hm.

- [Mary Ann] Drink your milk.

- [Guy] I'm going out.

- No, you're not.

- Where are the car keys?

- You're not going
anywhere, Guy.

- What you hide them?

Great, that's just great.

Am I being grounded, mom?

Just going round to the store.

- I know where you want to go.

- Mary Ann, would you
just give me the keys?

(door slamming shut)

- Jennifer, go over
to Mrs Lindy's and ask

if you can stay there
for a while, okay?

- What's wrong with Daddy?

- He's having a bad day.

Look, take your crayons.

I'll come get you in a
couple of hours, all right.

- Mm-hm.

(dramatic music)

- What is that?

- What?

- [Guy] What is
this on the floor?

- There's nothing on the floor.

- [Guy] What are these pills?

Where'd they go?

- There's nothing there, Guy.

- What did you do
with these pills?

- There are no pills,
you're hallucinating.

- You think that this is funny?

You put them there and
then you take them away.

You think that this
is cute or something.

Huh?

- I think you should
go back to bed.

- No, I'm not going to stay
here with you and your games.

Mary Ann, now, you're gonna
give me the damn keys!

- No.

- Fine.

I'll walk.

(dramatic music)

Where's my money?

I had some money.

- You gave it to
Mr Conklin, Guy.

He was there.

(glass shattering) Oh!

- Where's your money?

- I don't have any.

- Give me every...

- I don't have any.

I don't!

Guy!

I don't have any.

I don't have any!

- Liar!

- No!

Stop!

Stop it!

Okay.

At the hospital, my cheque.

- All right.

Let's go to the hospital.

(dramatic music)

- Jane!

- Mary Ann, what's wrong?

- I need your help.

My husband is in the car.

He's a heroin addict.

- What?

- And he's in withdrawal
and he's psychotic.

(dramatic music)

Guy.

- Got it?

- You have to come in with me.

They won't give me the cheque
unless you go sign for it.

- For God's sake!

Okay, where?

- Mr Grant, I'm Dr Gordon.

Can we talk for a minute?

- Why?

What's this about?

- [Dr Grant] We want
you to stay here.

We want to help you.

- Get your hands off me.

- Okay, we're just
gonna take a walk.

- Like hell!

- [Man] Grab him!

(dramatic music)

- [Man] Grab him!

- You bitch!

You tricked me, Mary Ann.

I'll kill ya!

I'll kill you, Mary Ann.

I'll kill ya.

(dramatic music)

(machine beeping)

(dramatic music)

- Mary Ann, Guy's conscious.

He's asking for you.

(somber music)

- [Mary Ann] Guy?

- How long I've been here?

- [Mary Ann] Two weeks.

(somber music)

- Doc, thanks a lot.

- Sure.
- Appreciate it.

- You take care.
- You bet I will.

- Mary Ann, you're a nice lady.

You're a terrific nurse.

You don't need this.

- What do you mean?

He's fine now.

- Don't sell yourself
some fantasy.

Once a junkie always a junkie.

(horn honking)

- Come on!

Can't wait til somebody asks
me what I've been doing.

Haven't you heard?

I'm the world's oldest
living movie usher.

I might make night manager.

It's between me and the
captain of the swim team.

- Tell 'em you sell
life insurance.

That'll shut 'em up.

- Ha, ha, ha, ha.

That's not bad.

- Hey, look at this.

I'm glad you came, man.

This must be your
beautiful wife.

- Mary Ann, this is Nick.

- Hi.

- Hey, come on in.

(soft piano music)

Probably know some people here.

- [Guy] Okay.

- Listen, um, down that
hall, last door on the left,

help yourself, okay.

- No, no, I don't consume.

- Come on, Guy, don't
give me that I'm clean

this week garbage, huh.

- I am.

Well.

- What?

- What?

You need permission?

Honey, it's a party.

Now, one head is not gonna
turn him back into a junkie.

Okay?

- Why's everyone looking at me?

- [Guy] I've been
clean for a long time.

- I know.

- [Guy] So it's not
like I can't do it.

- I know.

- I'm gonna have one
here but that's all.

I promise.

- [Nick] Yeah, well,
everybody believes you, Guy.

Go on down.

- I'm gonna be the only
one here who isn't high.

- Yeah, well, nobody
hangs out with Nick

for his wit and charm.

- What's it feel like?

- Oh.

It's really no way
to describe it.

Really.

There's just no
way to describe it.

- I wanna try it.

- What?

- Yeah, I wanna see
what it feels like.

Just once.

- But, Mary Ann, you?

- Yeah me.

Guy, it's been a
big part your life

I've always been left out of.

- Yeah, well, it's not a
part of my life anymore.

- Why are we standing here?

Just once, if it's
not gonna hurt you,

it won't hurt me either.

- Okay, if you're sure.

- I'm sure.

- Hold it.

(suspenseful music)

Hmm.

Nothing like virgin veins.

- Hmm.

How long will it take?

- As long as it takes
me to answer you.

- I don't feel anything.

- You don't?

My turn.

- [Mary Ann] Hello, Mrs Fuller.

Hi.

Hi, this is Mary Ann.

Um, I wanted to know,

Guy and I are gonna be
out a lot later tonight

than we thought.

- [Guy] All night.

- All night and I was
wondering if maybe, um,

Jennifer could spend
the night with you?

Thank you.

Thank you, I really
appreciate it.

I...

I really appreciate it.

I'm sorry.

I'll pick her up first
thing in the morning.

- [Guy] Yeah.

- Okay, thank you.
- Thank you, good night.

- You make it so hard.

- Well, what do you
think she was gonna say?

Hey, they're laughing, they're
out having a good time,

they must be stoned.

I better call the
social workers.

- Well, she might.

- Mary Ann, we don't
look like junkies.

We look like Ken and Barbie.

(dramatic music)

- [Jane] Do you?

- Oh God, I'm sorry.

- Are you okay?

- Yeah, slow blood sugar.

I'll get a cookie.

- [Woman On P.A. System]
Dr Murphy, neurology.

Dr Murphy, neurology.

- Thanks again.
- Okay, man.

See you tomorrow.

- [Guy] Hey!

- Guy, we gotta talk.

- Sure, what do want
to talk about what?

- I'm pregnant.

- What?

- I'm pregnant.

I took a home test
and I'm probably

a couple of months along.

I thought it was just
all this dope in my body.

- Mary Ann, I
don't believe this.

This is great!

- Great?

- You know how long I've
wanted to have a son?

Since I was 16 years old.

Oh Mary Ann, I
don't believe this.

- How do you know
it's gonna be a boy?

- Because I know it is.

Oh, this is wonderful.

- What if something's
wrong with it?

- Nothing's gonna
be wrong with it.

- But we took all that stuff.

- No, listen to me.

Everything's gonna be just fine.

We're both gonna get
clean and you're gonna eat

all the right
stuff, healthy stuff

and everything is gonna be fine.

I promise you.

Ho, ho!

A son, huh?

Let me get those.

- [Mary Ann] They're not heavy.

- I'll get them.

You buy anything green?

- Yeah, mouthwash.

- Asparagus.

I'll make you an omelet.

- With asparagus?

- Iron and protein.

I'm gonna have you in
great shape in no time.

Made a doctor's appointment
for you day after tomorrow.

- Guy!

- It's time.

You've been clean for weeks.

- But I'll have to
take off my clothes.

I still got track marks.

- We'll figure something out.

Mary Ann, you're
going to the doctor.

- Well, everything looks fine.

Heartbeat's fine, your
blood count is fine.

- Good.

- Of course, you should
have started prenatal care

as soon as you found
you were pregnant.

You're a nurse, Mary
Ann, you know that.

- Well, I haven't
had any problems.

- You haven't had any
that you know about.

What happened here?

- I burned it cooking with oil.

- Have you been
getting enough rest?

- Well, with a husband and
a job and a small child.

- I know.

Well, just do the best you can

and make sure you
get enough to eat.

I want to see some weight
on you your next visit.

- Okay.

- Mary Ann, did you
have any questions?

- No.

- You just don't
seem like yourself.

- Well, you've never
seen me pregnant before.

I'm fine.

- Okay, call me if
you need anything.

- Okay.

Oh.

Damn.

- There you go, you got it!

I can't believe that!

My mother could have
caught that pass.

Honey, you look tired.

Did you have your protein drink?

- Yes.

- Mary Ann.

What's the matter?

- I can't stand it.

- Can't stand what?

- The way I feel.

I want to die.

- Oh, honey, it's
gonna be alright.

- It's not gonna be alright.

Guy, I need something.

Just, just a little something,
but I need a break, okay.

Just for a little while.

- Mary Ann, what about the baby?

- The doctor said
the baby's fine.

I just need one hit.

How much could it hurt, please.

Just a little bit please, Guy.

Please.

I just need--

- All right, all right.

All right, we'll get some.

Shh.

I'll get you something.

- Uh.

Well, did you get it?

How much?

Good, okay, where are you now?

Well, come straight home, okay.

Don't stop anywhere.

Okay, bye.

- [Jenny] Mommy, look.

- Hmm.
- Look.

(dramatic music)

- What's on your arm?

- [Jenny] I drew it.

- Why?

- I wanted to be
like you and Daddy.

(dramatic music)

- You go in the bathroom
and you wash this off.

And don't you ever
do this again!

Just go!

(Jenny sobbing)

- Oh, oh, will you look at that!

Honey, you did it.

Mary Ann, you did it.

Look at it.

That's my son.

Look at that.

That's my son.

I called it, didn't I call it?

- [Doctor] Mr Grant, please.

- Guy, Guy, is he all right?

- Oh, he is gorgeous.

Looks just like me.

- What is it, is he gorgeous
or he looks just like you?

- Hey, cute.

He's perfect.

I counted everything,
it's all there.

- Oh.

Thank God.

- Thank you.

I'll be back.

- Oh my boy.

- [Guy] Oh, look at him!

(baby crying)

- He doesn't seem hungry.

Some babies just
don't like bottles.

Oh, there, there, sweetie.

It's okay.

He's been crying for
an awful long time.

Why don't you take
him for a minute?

I'm just gonna go get the
doctor to come look at him,

just see that
everything is all right.

(baby crying)

- We don't have much time.

Do you have the stuff?

- It's in my pocket.

I don't wanna do this.

- Well, do you think I do?

Look, we just do it once, okay.

As soon as my milk comes
in, I will lower my dosage

and we will wean him gradually.

He will be fine.

- He's so tiny.

- But if he goes
into withdrawal,

then they'll call
the social workers.

- Maybe they won't know
that anything is wrong?

- They'll know.

And they'll take him away and
we'll never see him again.

Just do as I told you.

We will never have
to do this again.

- Okay.

(dramatic music)

Hey Jenny, you wanna take
a ride on the rocket?

- Yeah!

- Excuse me, sir.

I'm interested in looking
at some portable TVs,

do you think you could explain

some of the difference
in prices to me?

- [Worker] Oh, certainly.

(piano music)

(baby crying)

- I'm sorry.

(dramatic music)

- Excuse me.

How old is your baby?

- Six months.

- Hi there.

I got an 18 month-old
grandchild at home.

Seems like she was
this little a week ago.

Have a nice day.

(Guy and Mary Ann laughing)

- What's so funny?

- Hey kiddo.

I got another quarter, you
want to ride the rocket again?

- Yeah.

- Maybe you can help me?

My brother gave me this
for our anniversary,

but I already have one and I
didn't want to embarrass him

by asking for a receipt.

(baby crying)

- Mommy, wake up.

- [Mary Ann] Mmm.

- Mommy, the baby's wet.

Daddy, wake up.

Daddy.

Mommy.

(baby crying)

Hi, Sonny.

Don't worry, I'm going to be
changing your diaper, okay.

Don't worry.

Mom's too tired.

Mom's sleeping.

So is daddy.

Come on.

- [Woman On P.A. System]
Dr Jergenson, 3562.

- Denise, my husband
is supposed to come by.

If you see him, could you tell
him I'm in the utility room?

- No problem.

(knocking on door)

- What took you so long?

- It's not my fault.

The guy I was meeting was late.

I'm not exactly dealing
with model citizens here.

- Give me as much as
you give yourself.

- No.

- Why is it I never get as much?

- Mary Ann, you weigh 50
pounds less than I do.

- I'm a nurse.

I know how much I can take.

It's more than half my
money, I want my fair share.

- Fine.

I'll give you some more.

(thudding)

Ladies.

(dramatic music)

- Hey Denise, did I
leave a chart out...

(dramatic music)

- Mary Ann, what's wrong?

(dramatic music)

- Mary Ann!

Are you okay?

- [Mary Ann] No, don't, don't!

- Hold still.

I need a cart.

Hold still.

I just wanna get your...

Hold still.

- [Denise] Hold still

- Just rip it, Denise, rip it.

Where's that cart?

Oh my God.

Get a crash cart over here now!

Page the doctor fast!

- No, Sandra, I'm fine.

I didn't quit, I took a leave.

Oh no.

I'm tired.

I was working forever.

I don't know what
you're talking about.

- I'm standing here
looking at these photos

that you sent of
you and the baby.

- [Mary Ann] So?

- Well, you look horrible.

You're thin as a rail.

You've got circles
under your eyes.

You look like a refuge
from a concentration camp

so don't you tell me
there's nothing wrong.

I'm your sister.

I love you.

If something's wrong,
I wanna know about it.

- No, no light.

- That was Sandra.

She wanted to know
why I look so bad

in those pictures I sent.

- [Guy] Did you look bad?

- She thinks so.

I thought I'd look great.

- What'd you tell her?

- [Mary Ann] Told her the truth.

- What?

- Told her I'm an anorexic.

(Guy laughing)

Told her I had to leave
work, I got so sick.

She wants us to come up to
Oregon till I get better.

- What'd you say?

- I said sure.

I mean what the hell.

We can get clean on
the way to Oregon.

- Hmm, not like we got
anything better to do.

- No.

No.

♪ Pine tree, pine tree, pine
tree, pine tree, pine tree

♪ Pine tree, pine tree, pine
tree, pine tree, pine tree

♪ Pine tree, pine tree

♪ Oak tree, oak tree, oak
tree, oak tree, oak tree

♪ Oak tree, oak tree, oak tree

- Jennifer, would you
stop the damn singing?

(baby crying)

What Sonny?

What for crying out loud?

- Will ya give him
something to quiet him down?

- What, I gave him everything!

- Give him something.

- I don't have anything.

- Give him a bottle, will ya.

- I think he has a bottle.

(baby screaming)

Here we are.

Hold on.

Get it Jenny.

Hold on.

You're a great (mumbles)

Watch your head,
watch your head.

Come on.

Never getting in that car again.

Hope they're still awake.

(doorbell ringing)

- Hey you guys,
where have you been?

You were supposed to
be here five days ago.

- [Sandra] We've
been worried sick.

- We made bad time.

- Well, you didn't call either.

- Well, we didn't
have money to call.

Sandra, find me a place
for Sonny to sleep.

- [Sandra] Sure, sure.

Come on Jenny, let me
show you your rooms.

- Hey Jack.

- [Sandra] Hey Sonny, are
you a sleepyhead, huh?

- What's wrong with you two?

You look terrible

- Well, we've been
driving for days.

We had to sleep in the car.

I was sick, how do
you expect us to look?

Jack, where's the bathroom?

- Down the hall to the left.

Mary Ann.

- I don't want to talk.

- Well, maybe I should
call the doctor.

- Don't call the...

I'm fine!

Don't call the doctor.

- Mary Ann, what's wrong?

- Mary Ann, we'll pay for it.

- Would you please tell
me what is going on.

- She won't tell
me what's wrong.

I'm gonna call the doctor.

- Don't, don't!

You can't call the doctor.

- Mary Ann.

- I am a heroin addict.

I'm in withdrawal.

So is Guy.

I don't think I can
take this much longer.

If I don't get something soon
I think I want to kill myself.

- It's okay.

We'll get you some help.

I'm really sorry, Mary Ann.

I don't want to do
this but I don't know

where else to take you.

The emergency room told us
to go to a treatment center,

but none of them would take
her without the insurance.

- [Receptionist] Sign here.

(dramatic music)

- Just give me a
little something to
make me feel better.

Just a little something.

(door slamming shut)

No!

Come back, don't close me in!

Come back!

Don't leave me here!

Oh, please don't do that!

Don't do that!

Please I need it!

Oh, you don't know!

Please.

Oh God!

No!

Come back!

God!

(somber music)

- Get up!

Get up!

- What?

What?

- Here.

It's a flight schedule.

Pick a city and I'll book
you a flight one way.

I want you out of my house
and I want you out now.

- What about Mary Ann?

What about my kids?

- Forget it, pal, you're
never gonna see them again

as long as there's
a breath in my body.

You are a liar, a
thief, a dope fiend.

You got Mary Ann hooked on
drugs and I'm shipping you

the hell out of here
instead of killing you.

So just pick up the phone
and book yourself a flight

before I change my mind.

Do it!

- Are you ready to
get out of here?

- Oh yeah.

How are the kids?

- Oh fine.

- Can't wait to see 'em.

- I'm sure they'll be
glad to see you too.

- Why didn't Guy come with you?

Sandra?

- Mary Ann, Guy's gone.

- What do you mean he's gone?

- Well, he left right after I
checked you into the hospital.

- Well, where'd he go?

- I don't know, he didn't say.

- Well, when's he coming back?

I can't believe that,
he wouldn't just leave.

- Mary Ann, Guy is a junkie,
he doesn't care about you

or the kids or anything
except his dope.

He got you hooked on heroin.

Is that something
you do to somebody

you're supposed to love?

You're a good person, Mary Ann.

This didn't happen because
you did something bad.

It happened because
you fell in love

with that slick-talking bastard.

He dragged you down with him

so he'd have some
company in his slime.

- I can't believe
he'd just leave us.

- [Jack] Morning.

- Morning.

- [Sandra] So how
was the meeting?

- What?

- Last night, how was it?

- Uh, that, I didn't make it

- Oh, well, there's probably
another one tonight.

I'll just check the
schedule that they gave us.

- Sandra.

I don't want to go
to those meetings.

I don't want to sit there
and tell my life story

to a bunch of strangers.

It's just the last
thing I need right now.

- Well, you said you'd go.

They wouldn't have let you out.

- Yeah, well, they
did let me out.

- Mary Ann.

- I didn't say I
was never gonna go.

I just don't want
to go right now .

Yeah, maybe when I
have my new place.

- Mary Ann, if you can't even
handle going to a meeting,

I'm not so sure that you're
ready to have your own place.

- I am ready.

I'm fine.

Would you at least let
me do something wrong

before you start convicting me!

- [Man] So where would
you like these, ma'am?

- [Mary Ann] Uh, both of these

go in the back bedroom, please.

- [Man] Okay.

- [Jenny] Mommy, is daddy gonna
come here and live with us?

- No, I don't think so.

- Why not?

- Well, he has to be
somewhere else right now.

Let's go to your room
and put your bed.

(somber music)

(soft music)

(somber music)

(phone ringing)

- Hello.

- [Mary Ann] Mrs Grant?

Hi, this is Mary Ann.

- Mary Ann?

- [Mary Ann] I'm
looking for Guy.

I was wondering if you knew
where I could reach him.

- Just a minute.

Guy, it's Mary Ann, she
wants to talk with you.

- Mary Ann?

- Guy.

- [Guy] It's really you.

- Last time I looked.

- [Guy] I was starting to think

I'd never hear from ya again.

- Well, phones work
both ways, you know.

- I figured you'd
just hang up on me.

- [Mary Ann] You
could have tried.

- I know.

It's just you know.

You never answered
any of my letters.

- What letters?

- You mean you
haven't gotten them?

I've written a letter
every single day

since Jack put me on that plane.

Sometimes I wrote two or three.

You haven't gotten any of them?

- Jack put you on the plane?

- He gave me my
complimentary one-way ticket.

- I don't believe this.

Sandra told me
that you just left

and nobody knew where you were.

I could kill her!

- No, they were just
trying to protect you.

I've got so much to tell you.

I've been clean for five months.

I'm going to a lot of meetings.

I've been doing all right.

I'm gonna be okay.

But I miss you so much
and I miss the kids.

But please tell them
I didn't just leave.

God, I can't even believe
I'm talking to you.

- I miss you so much.

- I miss you too.

Listen, why don't you come here?

I'll send the plane
tickets and we can live

with my mom until we
get back on our feet.

- [Mary Ann] When?

- There's just one thing.

- [Mary Ann] What?

- I can't risk it
unless you're clean.

- I am!

I've been clean for five months!

- God, I don't believe it.

I love you.

- I love you so much.

Oh.

- [Woman On P.A. System]
Flight 183, your service

has been delayed, we're now
ready for boarding at gate 24.

- Daddy.

- Jenny!
- Daddy!

- Hey!

Oh Jenny.

Hi.

- [Mary Ann] Hi.

- Oh God, I missed you.

Hey.

Got a good job in
a travel agency.

I'm actually saving money.

It's amazing how much
money you can save

when you're not shooting
it into your arm.

We ought to be able to
rent a house pretty soon.

I think it's not gonna
be long before we begin

to get on my mother's nerves.

- Well, I intend to look for
a job first thing tomorrow.

- No way.

Sweetheart, I want you
to rest and get adjusted.

I don't want any pressure on you

until you're feeling rock solid.

- Guy, I'm broke.

If I don't get a job
I don't have a cent.

- We don't need money.

Meetings are free,
resting is free, I'm free.

- Are you worried about what
I'm gonna spend the money on?

- No.

Look, you just got here,

let's worry about
this later, huh?

I'm just glad to have you home.

(dramatic music)

- Excuse me!

Excuse me, sir.

Would you have any spare change?

- Check.

- Thank you.

- Hello.
- Daddy!

- Hey!

Where's mom?

- I don't know.

- She's been gone since
right after lunch.

- Say where she was going?

- She didn't even say goodbye.

(dramatic music)

- Uh, oh.

(glass shattering)

- [Guy] What happened?

Did something happen
that I don't know about?

- No.

- [Guy] What made you
start drinking again?

- [Jenny] Mommy, can I go
with Suzy to the store?

- Yeah, sure.

- [Jenny] She said yes.

- So?

- I didn't start drinking again.

I never stopped.

- Mary Ann, you told
me you were sober.

- I said I was clean.

- Oh, give me a break.

- Well, I'll get sober.

- When Mary Ann?

- Mommy, I can't find
Sonny's diaper bag.

- I'll be there in a minute.

Guy, it's not that easy for me.

- You think it was easy for me?

That's cancer.

This is the address
of a meeting.

It starts at 10:30.

Get dressed now, you
can make it, okay.

Mary Ann.

- All right.

- You're not gonna
fool anyone anymore.

Those days are over.

(door slamming shut)

(doorbell ringing)

- Is this the Grant residence?

- Yeah.

- Um, I found this lady
passed out in the park

and her ID had
this address on it.

You guys missing somebody?

- What are you doing?

- Packing your things.

You're moving out.

- What?

- I found you an apartment.

I'll pay the rent until
you can get a job.

When you get yourself
into a program and show me

you can stay sober,
you can move back in.

Until then I don't want you
anywhere near me and the kids.

- What gives you the right?

- I'll tell you what!

Six months of staying
clean and sober.

The hell I went through
putting my life back together,

that's what gives me the right.

- I'm not gonna leave my kids.

- Our kids have
been through enough.

They're not gonna sit here
every night and watch you

brought home by whatever
stranger happens to find you

wherever you happen to pass out.

Mary Ann, how do you think
it feels seeing you that way?

- You can't do this to me.

- You're doing it to yourself.

- What did I do?

Please.

- Mary Ann.

I'm Al Van Petten.

It's nice to meet you.

I just finished reading
your life story.

- Then you must know how many
times I've flunked therapy.

- Yeah.

- I don't see why this time
should be any different.

- I know how you feel.

- No, you don't.

You guys just say
that cuz some book

said you're supposed to, but
you haven't lived my life.

- I was a heroin
addict for 11 years.

My life was in smoking
ruins by the time

I got into serious recovery.

I was broke, unemployed
and unemployable.

Took me a few false starts too.

- Yeah, well.

That's you.

- And what, you're more
screwed up than I was?

This is my son Michael.

He was born addicted to heroin.

His mother and I were shooting
up about five times a day.

He spent his first
couple of days in agony

going through withdrawal.

We almost lost him.

You didn't invent
anything new, Mary Ann.

- [Guy] So you like this guy?

That's good.

- [Mary Ann] Yeah, it
should help, I guess.

- [Guy] Been going to meetings?

- [Mary Ann] Mm-hmm.

I found one in a
church in Santa Monica.

- [Guy] I thought
you were gonna go

to the one I told you about.

- [Mary Ann] It's
too hard-nosed, I
couldn't deal with it.

- [Guy] It's supposed
to be hard-nosed.

See that's why it works.

- That's why it works for you.

- Hmm.

You know, I thought you
were serious this time.

- Don't start on me, Guy.

I have a right to
find my own way.

- Yeah, certainly
worked last time.

- Don't do this.

God, do you see what you do?

Yeah, I can't even
recover to suit you.

(water splashing)

- I'm sorry.

I mean it.

You're right.

I just want you to
hurry up and get well.

I want you back with us.

And I feel very guilty.

- For what?

- For getting you hooked.

- You didn't.

- Of course I did.

- You didn't get me hooked.

I was hooked for years.

I just didn't think
I was an addict

cuz I didn't shoot
anything into my veins.

That's the only thing
you introduced me to.

- What are you saying?

- Before I knew you, I
was on Valium, Demerol,

Dilaudid, Morphine, Methadone.

- No way.

I would have known.

- How?

You were too out of
it to notice anything.

- All these years
you never told me.

- I didn't want you to know.

I was embarrassed.

- Embarrassed?

You know what you're telling me?

I mean all this time I
thought that Jack was right.

I thought that I
ruined your life.

I mean I was ready
to give up my kids

because I thought
that's what I deserved

and you just let me think it.

- I'm sorry.

- You're sorry?

(door slamming shut)

It's like every time
I turn over a rock,

there's another pack of lies.

I mean who knows what
else she hasn't told me.

- [Mary Ann] There's
nothing else.

I was being honest, I
thought it was supposed

to be cleaning all this up.

- [Al] You are.

- Well, how with that kind
of support that I'm getting?

- How can you say that?

I have given her
nothing but support.

I pay the rent, I
take care of the kids.

- You tell me what
meeting to go to.

You breathe down my neck.

- Yeah, like you haven't
given me any reason to

and then you sit there!

How can you be so
self-righteous?

- I'm self-righteous!

- Okay, okay, just calm down.

Guy, you know what Mary
Ann's going through.

You've been there.

- So it's my fault?

- It's no one's fault, we're
not talking about fault.

Mary Ann needs a
safety of knowing

that you're still committed
to this relationship.

Can you let her know that?

- No.

- So what are we gonna do?

- I don't know.

- Do you want to--

- I don't know, Mary Ann.

I can't think right now.

(tires screeching)

(somber music)

(dramatic music)

(phone ringing)

(dramatic music)

(siren blaring)

Excuse me, what happened?

- You live here?

- My wife does, apartment B.

Is that her?

- She tried to kill herself.

Neighbors smelled
gas and called 911.

Close call.

She'll be okay.

(dramatic music)

(somber music)

- Okay, why don't you tell me
again what you promised me?

- [Mary Ann] I
won't do anything.

- The whole thing.

- I won't do anything
to hurt myself

accidentally or on purpose.

- What else?

- I'll call you
if I want to talk.

- And if you can't find me?

- I'll call someone else.

- [Al] Do you have a sponsor?

- Not yet, I'll get one.

- Today.

- Yeah.

- Have you heard from Guy?

- I really think I've
lost him this time.

- Maybe you have.

Maybe you've lost Guy.

Maybe you've lost your kids,
maybe you've lost everything.

You're better off
looking that in the face

than having it sneak
up on you in the dark.

There's one good
thing about having

everything stripped away.

It forces you to
look at what's left.

- There's nothing left.

- You're left.

(dramatic music)

- Guy.

(dramatic music)

(glass shattering)

(dramatic music)

Okay God, help me now.

I don't know how to
live and you won't

let me die so help me.

(somber music)

Hello, is this Dorothy?

This is Mary Ann, I met you at
the Thursday morning meeting

and you said you'd be my
sponsor if I wanted one.

Would you meet me someplace?

Uh-huh.

After I became a
nurse, I did everything

I could get my hands on.

No one knew because I was
a master at hiding it.

I was so busy being super
nurse that no one could get

close enough to me to
see my bloodshot eyes

and notice that my
speech was slurred.

I didn't believe I was addicted.

I mean I know what a junkie
looks like and that wasn't me.

But it was me.

Even after I figured that
out I couldn't ask for help

because I didn't
want anyone to know.

All my life I'd
felt I was horrible,

that I wasn't worth anything.

And drugs were the only way I
could get rid of that feeling.

I didn't care if they killed me,

as long as the drugs
got rid of that feeling.

After I stopped running
from my feelings,

I found that dealing with
them wasn't nearly so hard

as trying to run from
them all the time.

I thank God for making
me figure that out

before it was too late.

And I thank my husband, Guy,
for having the guts to stop

trying to save me so
I could save myself.

Thank you for letting
me share my story.

(audience clapping)