Crackity Jones (2013) - full transcript

Auggie finds out his former partner, whom he loved and saw shot, is still alive. Annie works with her to locate missing weapons that Henry might be selling to terrorists. Calder learns Annie is lying about events from a previous mission.

Previously on
Covert Affairs...

I spent most of last night,

getting up to speed on an
arms dealer named Dion Stavros.

Found out exactly where
he's getting his weapons

and to whom
he's selling them.

So, I have 25 missile
launches I need to move.

You've got 24 hours
to find me a buyer.

Where are
my missile launchers?


Your count was off.

There are only 20 missile
launchers--not 25.

We might keep secrets
for a living,

but we can't keep them
from each other.

I had a partner.
Her name was Helen Hanson.

We were married
for the mission, but--

You fell in love.

The last couple of days,
I've learned quite a bit

about Auggie's ex,
Helen Hanson.

Ask him if
he's talked to her recently.

- She's dead!
- Is she? Ask him.

I could never
work for you.

I held out my hand

and pulled you
out of the fire,

and this is how
you repay me!

I have Seth Newman's
flash drive,

and I am taking you down.

♪ Covert Affairs 04x07 ♪
Crackity Jones
Original Air Date on August 27, 2013

== sync, corrected by elderman ==



You're here.

What are you doing here?
What happened with Rossabi?


What'd Henry do?

He tanked
the DNA results,

saved me from the Feds.


Then, he offered me a job
at Lexington.

When I turned him down,
he told me to

think about the people
I've aligned myself with.

Those people being me.

That's right.

Did he say
anything else?

He said to ask you if you've
spoken to Helen lately.

Why would he tell you
to ask me that?

I don't know.

What do you think?

Well, I haven't
talked to her.

How could I?
She's dead.

Is there any more
to that story?


Everything that I've told you
about Helen is the truth.

So, what do you think
is his angle here?

I don't know.

I mean, if he's trying to
drive a wedge between us,

using my dead wife seems
a clumsy way to do it.

He stood a better chance
using that file.

Do you keep
any old photos?

Uh, yeah, a few.

Do you have any
of Helen?

The woman in this photo
is Teresa Hamilton,

the go-between
for Arthur and Teo.

No, that's Helen.

Helen and Teresa
are the same person.

Helen is still alive.

You know, they say

if you throw a coin
in this fountain,

you'll have crazy sex
with me all night long.

I'm pretty sure
throwing a coin in the Trevi

means you'll return
to Rome one day.

I must be thinking
of a different fountain.

The meet's on. 12:30,
Bar Mecagni.

Looks like Teo's intel
is panning out.

You okay?


For just a second,
I let myself forget

we were here on a mission.

Then you ruined it.

Let me make it up
to you.

Now we'll come back
to Rome together.

Not for work.

Here's a little token
to remember our promise.

I love it.

You sure you're okay?

I'm fine.

I've been looking for
a hat like that.

Did you buy it here?

If you have a map,
I can show you where.

Hey! Hey!

Go that way!
Cut him off!



No. No, no.



That was the last time
I saw her.

I woke up
in a jail cell,

and two days later,
Arthur got me out.

He's the one who told me
she was dead.

You think he knew then
she was still alive?

I don't know, but he
knew at some point.

Henry had recent pictures
of them together

in that file he gave you,

I need to talk to Arthur.

I'll drive.

Annie. Auggie.
Were we supposed to meet?

We found some new intel,

and we wanted to
talk to you right away.

Was there something else
on Seth Newman's flash drive?

I know about Helen.



Helen arranged
the entire scenario.

The Colombian mark,
the police.

So, she wasn't
really shot?

Squibs and blood packs.

I didn't know
the truth myself

until she came to me
with the idea

of working
from the shadows.

I helped set her up
with a new identity.

She worked for me

No one else at the CIA
even knew she existed.

Why wouldn't you
read me in?

Because she needed the world
to believe she was dead,

and the only way to do it

was if you believed it too.

I would never compromise
a mission or another operative.

I would have
followed that protocol.

You should have trusted me.
I'm sorry.

You and Teo kept in contact
with her?

Yes, Helen's been our cutout
as needed,

passing messages
between us.

I pulled her in more fully
into Henry's situation

about a week ago.


she's been working

on sensitive
counter-proliferation missions.

She has
an extensive knowledge

of global arms
trafficking networks

and all the players

You had her look into

the five missing missiles
from Vienna.

Yes, and she found out
that Henry paid

an Interpol officer named
Sabino Laurent to steal them.

Henry's going to Lyon
on Monday to make a deal,

and Helen's going tonight
to Lyon.

You want me
to go with her.


Because Annie's
import/export NOC

combined with Helen's
experience in arms trafficking

makes you two
the ideal team for this.

It's a two-person job.

You squeeze Sabino
from both sides

and take the missiles

before Henry has
a chance to use 'em.

Use 'em? You think
he's gonna fire 'em?

Well, he doesn't need to.

He can already prove

that I've been giving money

to a known ALC terrorist.

He wants revenge
for Jai's death.

He's not interested
in taking me down.

He wants to bury me.

Imagine if he could prove

that I've been providing
arms to Teo too,

outside of normal
CIA channels?

Yeah, sounds like
you're in deep shit

get somebody else
to go to Lyon.

This affects all of us,

Henry's a scorched earth
kind of guy.

I'm going.

I was there when
the missiles were taken.

I can be on a plane

Thanks, Annie.

You want to talk about
what happened in there?

Not really.

You punched Arthur
in the face.

He's been lying to me
for years

for no good reason.

The only other time
you've done something like this

was after Parker.

I dealt with my feelings
for Helen seven years ago.

If that's true,

why do you still
have photos of her?

I don't know.
I just do.

It's not like
I look at 'em.

Would you have
told me about this

if circumstances
didn't force your hand?

Honestly, I don't know.

So it's not,
"no more secrets."

I have been in intelligence
since I got out of college.

I have secrets
even I can't remember.

I don't understand
what you want from me here.

I just want to talk
to you.

You're going on a mission
with my dead ex-girlfriend.

What more is there to say?


So, there's a lot more
to say.

You're leaving
in two hours.

You really want to
do this right now?

Hello, Auggie.


What the hell
are you doing here?

Arthur called.?

I figured since the cat
was out of the bag,

this meeting
was inevitable.

So, you broke into
my apartment

to avoid
an awkward reunion?

I couldn't exactly
wait in the hall.

You didn't have to
come here at all.

I needed to talk to you.

Seems like everyone
needs to talk these days.

I'm about to go on a mission
with your girlfriend.

Arthur tells me she's solid,

but I wanted to hear your
assessment of her fieldwork.

This is the first time
you've contacted me

after pretending to be dead
for seven years.

There's a lot of stuff
we should talk about.

A credit report
on my girlfriend

is not high on that list.

Arthur already told you
what can be declassified.

Don't hide
behind the clearance.


Here's what I can
tell you.

The work I've been doing
since going dark

has involved
inserting myself

into tactical situations
that weren't possible before.

You mean,
when we were married.

Our marriage
was for the Agency.

You got confused about what
the relationship really was.

You know, it may have
started off as a cover,

but it didn't stay
that way.

It did for me.

You would say "I love you"
when no one else was around.

How was that
part of your cover?

It was a long time ago,

Who are you?

I haven't changed.

I'm the same person
I was then.

You just saw what
you wanted to see.

You don't have to worry
about Annie.

She can keep up with you
and then some.



Sit wherever you'd like.

Our target is
Sabino Laurent,

chief munitions officer.

And the plan is?

You'll appraise your NOC
as Annie Walker.

and confront Sabino

about your missing missiles.

And what are you
gonna do?

I'll pose
as an MI6 officer

the missiles.

He'll be desperate to unload
them long before Monday.

Why'd you go dark
seven years ago?

Unless it's about
this mission,

I'd rather not talk.

I like to keep focused.

It's just that I've never
heard of a person

doing what you did.

I'm curious.


You were wondering how
I could do it to Auggie.

You're protecting him.

But as long as we're talking,
you should know,

I have serious concerns
about your ability

to make objective decisions
in the field.

Henry Wilcox offered you a job
at his consulting firm.

You turned it down.

How do you know that?

Does it matter?

I made a judgment call.

You had a prime opportunity
to embed yourself

right beside your target,
and you turned it down

because you despise him.

You made
an emotional decision.


Henry wanted me to see it

as a chance
to spy on him,

but I saw it for what
it really was--

a ploy to keep me close.

an interesting decision.

Don't worry
about my decisions.

They've served me well
so far.

Hey, Auggie,
sorry we're late.

We had to stop
for a milkshake.

Breakfast of champions.

I got you one.
That's a chocolate explosion.

Whoa, nice digs!

Where should we
set up?

What are you guys
doing here?

You emailed us yesterday

and invited us over,

Something about
a super secret project?

Yeah, right. Sorry.

You can set up
on the credenza.

Are you all right,


Just didn't sleep
very well.

Nothing a few gallons
of coffee can't cure.

Hey, listen,
before you get set up,

you guys should know,
this is off-book

and unsanctioned,

so if anyone
finds out about this,

we could lose our jobs,
maybe worse.

You had me at pizza.

I assume there will be
pizza, right?


Now, this is
a 1.8 gigapixel image

taken by
a surveillance drone.

Nothing's happening.

When you click on
this image,

it should automatically
zoom in.

We should be able
to click on those trees

until we can count
the veins in the leaves.

It's a lot of data
to rebuild.

Offbook and on-point.
This is awesome.

Hey, there's nothing
awesome about this, Eric.

We are risking our careers
and our freedoms

because people's lives
are at stake.

I'm really sorry, man.

I mean, I'm here to help,
whatever it takes.

All right,
let's get to work.

I informed Tarel Birkin

that I was aborting
the mission.

He left the hotel first.

I waited 15 minutes,

and then I exited
through the front entrance.

Outside, I was overpowered
by Gunter Schmid.

He took me
to Stavros' apartment.

I believed that they
were going to kill me.

I fought them both off until
I could get Gunter's gun,

and I used it against them.

I left the scene
immediately and flew out of--

Robert Bernard.

Robbie B.

Calder Michaels.

Calder Michaels.

You sound like hell.

Because I've been here
all night.

It's called dedication.

You should look it up sometime.
It's under "D."

You finally got
that big promotion

and now you actually have to
work for a living, huh?


What can I do for you?

I'm going through
my operative's report

from the Dion Stavros mission,

and I wanted to take a look
at the crime scene photos,

but your lazy ass hasn't
uploaded them to the server yet.

Let's look at them

What exactly
are we looking for?

Well, nothing specific.

I was just curious
about their injuries.

Wounds look big.

You know the caliber yet?

Well, the victims were
shot with a .45.

What were they packing?

Stavros was unarmed.

The big fellow
was carrying a 9-millimeter.

I take it that means the .45
belongs to your operative?

I fought them both off

until I could get
Gunter's gun,

and I used it against them.

Robert, can you get me
security camera footage

from the Imperial Hotel?

- Yeah, you bet.
- Thanks, brother.



Do I know you?


I'm the owner of the
missile launchers you stole.

I want them back,
and I'm willing to pay.

You must have me

with someone else,

Uh, no.
You're Sabino Laurent.

You're in control of Interpol's
munitions clearinghouse.

You're the only man with
the means and opportunity

to turn a van
of 25 missile launchers

into a van of 20.

And you can do it without
anyone else knowing,

but the thing is...
I know.

And what is this
incriminating information

you claim to have?

You had two opportunities
to return to the DGSE,

and you turned them
both down.

Nobody chooses to stay
at Interpol.

The pay's a joke.
And the work's boring.

But you chose to stay
because you're making a mint...

Stealing impounded weapons
and selling them.

Like my missile launchers.

My card.

There's a number
for a crime tip line on back.

Feel free to call anytime.

I'm sure my superiors will have
no issue taking my word

over that
of an admitted arms trafficker.

I don't want to make trouble
for you.

I make a deal.

I set him up.

Get ready to knock him down.

- Bonjour.
- Bonjour.

Emily Howard.

What is this regarding?

Five stolen Stinger missiles.

Forgive me, mademoiselle,

but how does this fall under
MI-6 purview?

We've had eyes
on Dion Stavros

since he was dealing
to the I.R.A.

Now he sells
to numerous terror groups

operating within the U.K.

So if weapons he owns
have suddenly vanished,

we'd like to know who has them.

This is the first time
I'm hearing

of anything being missing.

I find that
deeply concerning,

considering the missiles

while under your supervision.

I need to see every scrap
of paper you have

regarding those missiles

and then you and I are going to
inventory the clearinghouse.

You have no authority
to order such an action.

Your boss Benoit Collet does.

He's already given
his approval

and assured me you'd be
at my full disposal

until my investigation
is complete.

Perhaps I should call
Monsieur Collet myself.

You're about to call
your boss's boss

at home on the weekend
to question his directives?

We have a phrase for that
at MI-6.

Incredibly bloody stupid.


My apologies, Ms. Howard.

Monsieur Collet has just
explained the situation to me.

I'd like to offer my full
attention to your investigation.

We could meet later for dinner
to discuss your needs.

8:00, Les Adrets?


Ms. Walker.
Sabino speaking.

Perhaps we can do business
after all.

Arthur. Your pal Collet
came through in a big way.

Whatever favor he owed you--
consider it paid in full.

Hey, what's Annie
up to tonight?

She's working.


Oh, cool.



Is there something
you two wanna ask me?

- It's just--
- N-no.

It's...just there's
this rumor...

Going around that, um,

you and Annie started dating.


You hear this rumor, Hollman?
I want no part of this.

You want to know
if it's true.

I don't mean to overstep...

But, yes, I want to know
if it's true, please.

What's the consensus
at Langley?

- 60/40 in favor of.
- Where do you fall in there?

Ah, see, honestly...

I'm not sure.

I mean, I'd like to think

that you guys are together,
but if you're not,

I hope you are doing
everything humanly possible

to make it happen, 'cause...

'Cause you hit the jackpot.

You did.
You hit the jackpot

when you got assigned
to be her handler.

When are you ever gonna find
another girl like that?

Are you guys hungry?

- Constantly.
- Let's get that pizza.

You're not coming?

No. Bring me back a slice.

I gotta go into Langley
for something.

Joan, you got a minute?

Yeah, sure.
Come in.

What's up?

I'm wondering...

How do you determine...

Pairings for operations?

Well, we take into account
the Myers-Briggs assessment,

personal background,
interests, work experience.

Standard compatibility
regression matching.

You're wondering why
I assigned Annie to you.

I'm just curious
how these decisions are made.

Annie needed someone
to ground her.

And you needed someone to force
you out of your comfort zone.

- Comfort zone.
- Yeah.

You constantly push each other,
and as a result,

you continue to evolve
as people and operatives

in ways that never cease
to impress me.

But the truth is...

You were also the guy
available that day.

Do any of these pairings
ever go the distance?

In this line of work...

We're good liars to begin with.

The Agency trains us
to be better liars.

We use lies to protect
our friends

and fool our enemies, but...

At the end of the day,
a lie is still a lie.

Some relationships
can survive in these conditions,

the reality is most don't.


You find what you need
at the office?

Not sure.
How's it going?

I think...We've...Got it.

Now we go through
every last pixel.

What are we looking for,

Anything that doesn't belong
in a jungle.


Do humans fit that bill?

I say so.
What'd you find?

Two men.
One looks...


The other--whoa!

You are not gonna believe
who it is.

Henry Wilcox.

First you miss the meet

we were supposed to have
an hour ago,

then you show up
at my safe house?

We're not supposed to
know each other.

If anybody saw you
come in here,

you could have blown
the entire mission.

Henry's here.
We need to leave Lyon ASAP

and reassess.
I can't cut bait and run.

I'm meeting Sabino
at a dock on the Rhone.

What part of "he's here"
don't you understand?

It's a setup.
To do what? Kill me?

I don't think so.
If Henry wanted me dead,

he's had plenty
of opportunities.

Then why is he here
two days early?

Henry Wilcox doesn't just
drop everything on a whim.

And get on a plane.
I can't leave-not yet.

I can turn Sabino--I can get him
to sell me these missiles.

Why are you being
so obstinate?

If I ran every time
my life was in danger,

I'd never complete a mission.

I know where
those missiles are today.

If I don't act,
I lose them forever.

Ever win for Henry
is another log on the fire.

He's building to burn
the people I care about,

and I am not gonna
let that happen.

That's exactly why
you're gonna fail.

Two weeks before I went dark,

Auggie and I went
to plant a bug,

in the office of a man
we believed

was laundering money
for Dev Sol.

Auggie was planting a
listening device in the office.

I was supposed to install
a signal relay

across the street.

The target
was a dangerous man.

If there was even
the suspicion

that someone
in his organization

was working against him...
they disappeared.

The situation of protocol
is to never risk

revealing yourself unless
your life is at risk...

and you have no choice.

But in that moment,

I didn't care about
preserving the mission.

The only thing I cared about
was saving Auggie.


Turns out
he had no intention

of going up to the office.

He was just picking up
a package he left behind.

Had I just kept my cool
and stayed on the roof,

he never would have known
we were there.

But I made
an emotional decision.

In trying to save Auggie,
I endangered both of us.

A week later,
I saw the target on the campus

where Auggie and I were posing
as married grad students.


I was blown.

I couldn't stay in Rome.

But Auggie's cover
was still intact.

The target
never knew he was there.

But every second
I stayed with Auggie,

I put him in danger.


What's wrong?


That night,
I realized what I had to do.


I knew if I could
make it through that moment...


I could do anything.

If you loved Auggie,

why didn't you
tell him all of this?

You could have left and been
reassigned somewhere together.

You know what getting burned
does to an operative's career.

It ends it.

Going dark freed me up

to become an operative
I never imagined was possible.

What about the tradeoffs?

Only a handful of people
even know you exist.

It's true.
Relationships are a liability.

You have any regrets?

I've been able to do
a lot of good things

in this world.

But leaving Auggie changed
the course of both our lives.

And I have to live with that
every day.

Do you still love him?

I don't even know what
that word means anymore.

Yes, you do.

Know the stakes
are high for you

and the people you care about,

and I know you think
leaving Lyon

means all hope is lost.

But there are other ways
to beat Henry.

Losing one battle
doesn't mean the war is over.

But if you die,
there is no war.

I've come too far.

I'll be smart,
but I'm not backing down.

That's an emotional decision.

I can't be any part of that.

I didn't ask you to be.

The missile launchers
are in the plane.

Did you bring the money?

After this,

my business with Henry Wilcox
is finished.

You know what happens
to people

after they finish their
business with Henry Wilcox.

They die.

He doesn't leave loose ends.

The missiles were never here.

Henry probably has them
halfway across the world by now.

Yeah. The question is
which half?

What time
will the jet be ready?

I'm not going back to D.C.

I hope this won't offend you,

but when we met,
I didn't think much of you.

No. How could anyone
take offense to that?

But I saw something in you
this weekend.

You will run through
brick walls for Auggie...

And Henry will use that against
you every chance he gets.

Seven years ago,
I learned

the most dangerous thing
a spy can do

is fall in love.

I had to make a choice.

Like it or not,
you do too.

Decide what it is
you really wanna do here.

Be with Auggie,
or stop Henry.

There may come a time
when you'll be forced

to choose between the two,

and if you can't...
You're gonna fail at both.

- Auggie.
- We found something.

The Colombian
is Eduardo Vargas..

He's one of Teo's ALC comrades.

He was detained
when Annie and Calder

raided their stronghold.

Henry's been having secret
meetings with ALC rebels.

It's no wonder he had Seth
sneak this out of the building.

It's a safe bet it's been purged
from the CIA database.

still in CIA custody.

Hopefully we can get him
to tell us

why Henry was in Colombia.

There's something
I need to tell you, Auggie.

When I supported
Helen's choice,

I was making a decision
to help her,

not hurt you.

I'm sorry for the pain
it's caused you over the years.

But I still stand
behind my decision.

So you're sorry,
but you have no regrets.


since Helen went dark,

the things she's been able
to accomplish are astounding.

Yeah. She's been
a big help to Teo.

- What's that mean?
- You trusted me

to train Teo
and keep your secret.

But when Helen went dark,
you had a choice.

You could be honest
with me or help your son.

You chose Teo.

This is a job of hard choices.

You made those decisions

because you felt
they were for the better good.

But you should know this.

I can't ever trust you again.


You're back.

It wasn't fair of me

to challenge you about
where your head is at.

No, no, come on.

I flew off the handle
at Arthur, I...

I definitely
have some things to think about.

Well, the truth is that--

I'm not totally clear
about my feelings.

I have a lot that I need
to think about too.

Meaning what?

The last few days
with Helen have been...


After a couple days
with Helen,

you're thinking...

You're feeling
like you can't have love

and be a spy.

Like you have to choose.

This is the part where you're
supposed to refute all that.

Helen is wrong
about a lot of things.

I don't know...
Maybe she's right about that.

Meaning what?

I wanna be with you,

I have from the second
you walked into my life.

But since we started this...

It's like we
have never had time...for us.

First Henry and the file

and then Teo and then Helen...

Yeah. And I just keep thinking
that it's gotta stop.

It has to end.
We have to find

someplace more normal,

For people like us,
there is no normal.

What do we do?

I don't know.

I don't know either.

But I know that...
If the only thing

we can agree on
is the fact that we don't know,

that's not good enough.

So is that it, is this...

The end?

I think so.

== sync, corrected by elderman ==