Coming to America (1988) - full transcript

Translation and subtitles by
PEPPER & LALASPAIN
*** SONG LIVES FOR EVER ***

Good morning,

Your Highness.

Good morning,

Your Highness.

Good morning,

Your Highness.

Happy Birthday,

Your Highness.

Yes, it is my birthday.

Oha, it is



my 21st birthday.

Just once, might I use

the bathroom by myself?

Most amusing, sir.

Wipers!

The royal penis

is clean,

Your Highness.

His highness must be

excited today.

Why?

Today is

your 21st birthday.

You meet



your wife-to-be.

How can a man

get excited

about a woman

he's never seen?

He certainly is quiet

this morning.

He looks sad.

Is something

troubling you, son?

No, father.

Son, please.

I'm more than the exalted

ruler of this land

and master

of all I survey.

I'm also

a concerned dad.

Well, father...

Just a moment.

What?

I think

he's coming to talk.

Wait, akeem.

Rose bearers!

Akeem, come sit.

Now, my son...

You've grown a mustache.

Jaffe...

It's been a year.

So, what is it, my son?

First,

it is things like this.

What?

The rose petals.

You're the son

of a king.

Why not walk

on the petals of roses?

Without rose petals,

I'd still be

the king's son.

It is settled.

From this day forth,

anyone who throws roses

at my son's feet

will answer to me.

Father, it is not just that.

It's everything,

the cooking, the pampering,

the dressing, the bathing.

Actually, I rather enjoy

the bathing,

but just for once,

I'd like to cook

for myself, dress myself,

wipe my own backside.

Why can't I

find my own wife?

Aha, so that's it.

We have gone

to a great deal of trouble

to select for you

a very fine wife.

Since the day she was born,

she was taught to...

Walk, speak

and think as a queen.

What if

I do not love her?

It's normal to feel anxiety

about your queen.

When I met your father,

I was terrified.

I must admit,

I was frightened, too.

I was so nervous

I became nauseous,

but over the years,

I have grown to love

your father very much.

So, you see,

there is a fine line

between love and nausea.

I understand,

father,

but when I marry,

I want the woman to love me

for who I am.

Who?

I am a man

who's never tied his shoes.

Wrong.

You are a prince

who has never tied his shoes.

Believe me,

I tied my own shoes once.

It is overrated.

Good morning,

your majesty.

It is beautiful

in Zamunda.

And, semmi,

what is it now?

You look especially radiant,

your grace.

Is that so?

I was remarking

the other day

what lovely skin

the queen has.

Semmi, do you not

have somewhere you should go?

Yes!

I'm taking the birthday boy

for his workout.

Excuse me, father...

And mother.

Have a good day,

my son.

Akeem, what happened

to the rose bearers?

Defend yourself,

you sweat

from a baboon's balls.

You can have a woman

who'll obey you,

but you'd rather

have a woman

who has an opinion?

Only dogs obey.

If you love

your wife,

you will value

her opinion.

Hippopotamus shit!

You're the heir

to the throne of Zamunda.

Your wife need only have

a pretty face, a firm backside,

and big breasts

like casaba melons.

You'd share your bed and fortune

with a beautiful fool?

That's how it is

with men of power.

It is tradition.

It is also tradition

that times must

and always do change, my friend.

Get your royal engagement

t-shirt!

Step forth! Get your

royal engagement t-shirt!

These really are

delicious.

Yes, thank you.

Here,

try our vintage.

Your majesty.

I am colonel izzi,

and today,

with your blessing,

I offer my daughter

to your son.

My blessing is granted.

Let the courtship commence.

Pardon me.

Step aside, please.

Coming through!

Excuse me!

Out of the way!

Greetings, great prince.

Presenting

miss Imani izzi.

♪ She's your queen-to-be ♪

♪ a queen-to-be forever ♪

♪ a queen who'll do whatever ♪

♪ his highness desires ♪

♪ she's your queen-to-be ♪

♪ a vision of perfection ♪

♪ an object of affection ♪

♪ to quench your royal fire ♪

♪ completely free

from infection ♪

♪ to be used

at your discretion ♪

♪ waiting only

for your direction ♪

♪ your queen-to-be ♪♪

May I talk to you alone

for a moment, please?

Excuse us...

For a moment.

So...

Am I not all

you dreamed I would be?

You're fine.

Beautiful.

It's just if we're

going to be married,

I thought we should

get acquainted.

I've been trained

to serve you

since I was born.

I would like

to know about you.

What do you like?

Whatever you like.

What kind of music

do you like?

Whatever kind

of music you like.

I know what I like,

and I know you know what I like

because you are trained

to know what I like.

But I'd like to know

what you like.

Do you have a favorite food?

Yes.

Good! What is

your favorite food?

Whatever food

you like.

This is impossible.

From this moment on,

I command you

not to obey me.

No.

Are you saying that no matter

what I tell you to do,

you will do?

Yes, Your Highness.

Anything I say,

you'll do?

Yes, Your Highness.

Bark like a dog.

Arf arf arf arf

arf arf arf.

A big dog.

Woof woof woof woof.

Hop on one leg.

Woof woof woof

woof woof woof.

Make a noise like

an orangutan.

Ooh ooh ooh ooh

ooh ooh ooh ooh.

I see the two of you

are getting along.

Ooh ooh ooh

ooh ooh ooh.

Excuse me

for a moment.

Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh.

Fine girl, isn't she?

I told you not to worry.

Father.

About this wedding...

Ahem.

The guests are waiting,

your majesty.

Let them wait!

I'm talking

to my son.

Come...

Let's go

for a stroll.

Hello, barbar.

Time does fly fast,

my son.

It seems only yesterday

I ordered your

first diaper changed.

Now you're a man

about to be married.

She will give you

much pleasure,

don't you think?

I am not sure

if I am ready.

Son, I know we never

talked about this,

but I always assumed

you had sex

with your bathers.

I know I do.

It's not that, father.

It's just that

I'm 21 years old,

and I've never

left Zamunda.

I have yet to experience

the outside world.

So you want to

sow your royal oats.

No, it's not that...

You're right!

Get out,

see the world,

fulfill every

erotic desire.

In 40 days, you

will come back

and marry Imani.

But, father...

It is settled.

May I have

your attention, please?

The wedding

will proceed in 40 days.

You may go now.

Good night.

Oha, prepare

the royal baggage.

My son's

going on a trip.

Prepare the royal baggage!

This trip is

an excellent idea.

40 days of fornication.

Semmi. I have

something else in mind.

Tell no one of this.

I intend to find my bride.

What's wrong with

the one you have now?

Didn't you want

to rip her clothes off

right then and there?

I want a woman that will arouse

my intellect and my loins.

Where will you

find her?

In America!

The land is so big.

The choice is so infinite.

Where shall we go,

Los Angeles

or New York?

Fate will decide.

Heads, New York.

Tails, Los Angeles.

We go to New York.

Where in New York can

one find a woman with grace,

elegance, taste and culture?

A woman suitable

for a king.

Queens.

No one can know

I am royalty.

We must seem no different

than the average man.

I won't say anything.

Halt!

You dumb fuck!

Take us to queens

at once!

Are you sure you guys

want to go to queens?

Rich fellows like you

should be in Manhattan,

staying at the Waldorf

or the palace.

The palace sounds good.

Take us there.

No. I want queens.

We're not rich.

We're ordinary

African students.

Whatever you say.

What part of queens

you want?

Take us to

the most common part.

That's easy. If there's anything

queens has a lot of,

it's common parts.

What does

dumb fuck mean?

This shitty enough for you?

Yes, this is perfect.

Fascinating!

Semmi, look at this.

America

is great indeed.

Imagine a country so free,

one can throw glass

on the streets.

You must be

out of your minds!

You're crazy!

You're crazy!

Listen. Real Americans!

Sugar ray Robinson's

the greatest fighter

that ever lived.

What about Joe Louis?

The brown bomber!

That was

a great boxer!

Damn right!

I suppose nobody's

ever heard of Cassius Clay?

Got a point.

He was a bad motherfucker.

I ain't saying

Clay ain't bad.

I stopped liking him

once he changed his name

to Muhammad Ali.

Wait a second.

A man has a right

to change his name

to whatever he wants

to change it to.

If a man wants

to be called Muhammad Ali,

this is a free country.

You should respect his wishes,

and call him

Muhammad Ali.

I'm going

to call him Clay.

That's right.

I say Clay.

Get out.

He always be Clay to me.

I don't care what

he changed his name to.

Then you're a putz,

all three of you.

You should change

the name outside

to the three putzes.

What the fuck

do you want?

We desire a room.

Better not

waste my time.

You got money?

Come on in,

gentlemen.

Yo, man,

get the big bag!

Yeah!

Excuse me

if I was brusque.

Sometimes we get boo-boos

in here without a dollar

to their name.

Obviously you came

on another boat.

We seek meager

accommodations.

Excuse me?

We require a room

that is very poor.

Hey, stu!

Your rent's due,

motherfucker!

Don't be pulling that falling

down the stairs shit on me!

Are you conscious?

Every month,

the same damn thing.

I'm telling you

the truth.

All right,

here we are.

There's only one bathroom

on this floor,

so you're going

to have to share it.

We got

an insect problem,

but you boys from Africa

are used to that.

And another thing,

don't use the elevator.

It's a death trap.

This is the place

I was telling you about.

It's real fucked up.

Got just one window

facing a brick wall.

Used to rent it

to a blind man.

Damn shame what they did

to that dog.

We will take the room.

Yes!

Behold, semmi.

Life. Real life!

A thing we

have been denied

for far too long.

Good morning,

my neighbors!

Hey, fuck you!

Yes, yes!

Fuck you, too!

Ha ha! Mighty fine!

Yeah.

Come to my house!

I'm beginning to suspect

these are the people

that stole our luggage.

You want to buy

some toothbrushes?

This is some fly

personal hygiene equipment.

I've got

a hell of hair dryer.

Thief!

Stop, thief!

Come back!

Let him go.

But those things

belong to us.

We're well rid

of them.

Let them wear

our princely robes.

Let us dress

as new yorkers.

♪ You know what I'm saying? ♪

♪ You know

I know it's real ♪

♪ but they don't know

that you know I know the deal ♪♪

I feel like

a complete idiot.

Do not

be ridiculous.

You can be all the things

you've always wanted to be.

Beautiful. Sexy.

It's easy as 1, 2, 3.

♪ Just let your soul glow ♪

♪ just let it shine through ♪

♪ just let

your soul glow, baby ♪

♪ feel it so silky smooth ♪

♪ just let it shine through ♪

♪ just let

your soul glow ♪♪

Soul glo.

Perhaps I should cut off

my prince's lock.

No!

Yes.

You must be crazy!

Joe Louis was

the greatest boxer ever!

I'll be with you

in a minute.

He was badder than

Cassius Clay or sugar ray.

He was badder

than Mike Tyson.

He could whip

all their asses!

What about

rocky marciano?

There they go!

Every time I start

talking about boxing,

a white man got to

pull out rocky marciano!

That they one!

Rocky marciano!

Rocky marciano!

Let me tell you something!

He was good,

but compared to Joe Louis,

he ain't shit!

He beat Joe Louis' ass.

That's right,

he did whoop him.

Joe Louis was 75

when they fought!

He got

his ass whooped.

Joe Louis come

out of retirement

to fight him.

He was 76!

He always lied

about his age.

One time frank Sinatra

came and sat in this chair.

I asked him,

"how old is Joe Louis?"

You know what

frank told me?

"Joe Louis

is 137 years old."

Man,

you ain't never meet

no frank Sinatra.

Fuck you, fuck you,

and fuck you!

Who's next?

Is that some kind

of a weave or something?

It's natural.

It's been growing since birth.

What kind of chemical

you got in there?

I have put

no chemicals,

only juices

and berries.

How do you

want it cut?

Just make it

nice and neat.

That will be $8.00.

Tell me, semmi,

honestly.

How do I look?

I think it is time

to find your queen.

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ yeah ♪

I'm going to get

on out of your way.

I'll talk to you later.

♪ What you want ♪

♪ I know I got it ♪

♪ what you need ♪

♪ I know I got it ♪

♪ what you need ♪

♪ what you need, ♪

♪ what you want ♪

♪ I know I got it ♪

♪ what you need ♪

♪ I know I gots it, girl ♪

♪ what's you want ♪

♪ what you need ♪

♪ yeah ♪♪

I've got a secret.

I worship the devil.

See, that's the problem.

I can't find a man

that can satisfy me!

Some guys go an hour,

hour and a half, that's it.

A man's got to

put in overtime for me

to get off.

I'm not interested

unless the man drives a BMW.

I'm almost single.

My husband's

on death row.

This is the first date

Theresa and I have been on

since the doctor

separated us.

I'm into the group thing.

I was Joan of arc

in my former life.

♪ Ka-bup-bup-cha

ka-bup-bup ♪

♪ my name is peaches,

and I'm the best ♪

♪ all the d.J.S want

to feel my breasts ♪

♪ op op op ♪

♪ op op

eeh eeh ♪♪

I want to work

on videos.

I want to star in them.

I want to become

a pop singer and a rock singer.

Then I'll try acting.

People tell me

how natural I am.

Then I'll write my own stories,

direct my own stories,

produce my own movies...

I hope you don't mind me

coming over and sitting down.

I've been

watching you all evening.

I want to

tear you apart.

And your friend, too.

Is it my imagination,

or does every woman in New York

have a severe

emotional problem?

I doubt we'll ever

find your queen.

Mr. Clarence.

Hey! The boys

from Africa!

How you doing

this evening?

Sir, where can one go

to find nice women here?

You got to look.

We have been to

many bars.

That's where you messed up.

You can't go to no bar

to find a nice woman.

You got to go

to a nice place.

Like this place I'm going,

the black awareness rally.

There gonna be

fine women there.

That's where

I'm goin'. Shit.

I didn't come here

to preach to you today.

But, you know...

When I look at

these contestants

for the miss black awareness

pageant,

I feel good!

I feel good

'cause I know there's a god!

There's a god somewhere.

Turn around, ladies.

You know

there's a god

who sits on high

and looks down low.

Man cannot make it

like this.

Larry flynt, Hugh Hefner,

they can take the picture,

but they can't make it.

Only god above

can make it for you.

Apparently, these are

the best women in queens.

Pick one,

and let's go home.

Be patient,

my friend.

Do you love him?

Do you feel joy? Say joy!

Joy! Joy!

Joy!

Joy!

Joy!

Joy!

Joy! Joy!

Amen!

Amen!

Amen!

Amen, brother!

Don't be ashamed

to call his name!

Yes, lord!

Only god can give her

that kind of joy!

Yes!

Amen!

Make a joyful noise

unto the lord!

I am very happy

to be here!

Amen!

Amen!

Yes, sir!

Can I get

an amen?

Amen!

Yes!

I don't know

what you come to do,

but...

♪ I... ♪♪

Come to praise

his name.

Lord, lord.

Girls, you can leave now.

Thank you very much.

There's a god

somewhere.

I got a special treat

for you this evening.

A young man that you all

know as Joe the policeman

from the "what's going down"

episode of that's my mama.

I want you

to put your hands together

and welcome him

to the stage.

A big round of applause

for Jackson height's own...

Mr. Randy Watson!

Yes!

Randy Watson! Ha ha!

That boy

is good!

Good and terrible.

And reverend brown!

This man's

been my reverend

since I was

a little boy,

and I love him dearly.

You're a special man.

Reverend brown!

Reverend brown!

It's so lovely

to be here.

Give yourselves

a round of applause.

You're so lovely.

While you're

in the clapping mood,

give a round of applause

to my band,

sexual chocolate!

Sexual chocolate!

They play fine,

don't you agree?

♪ I believe that

children are our future ♪

Thank you!

♪ Teach them well

and let them lead the way ♪

♪ show them all the beauty

they possess inside ♪

♪ give them a sense ♪

♪ of pride ♪

Some of

the good stuff, right?

Want a coke?

Enjoying the show?

Enjoy, young man.

♪ I decided

long ago ♪

♪ never to walk

in anyone's shadow ♪

♪ if I fail, if I succeed ♪

♪ you can't take away

my dignity ♪

♪ because the greatest ♪

♪ love of all ♪

♪ inside of me-e-e-e ♪

♪ ye-ye-♪♪

Sexual chocolate!

Sexual chocolate!

God damn,

that boy can sing!

You crazy.

Put you hands together

for Mr. Randy Watson.

Yeah! One more time,

Randy Watson!

How about it?

Before we go

any further,

I'd like to thank.

Mr. Cleo McDowell

who is responsible

for the fine food and beverages.

Cleo, I know you proud

of your lovely daughters,

we are, too.

Please welcome

one of tonight's organizers,

miss Lisa McDowell!

Come up here,

baby girl.

Plug the new

salad bar.

I'm not mentioning

the restaurant.

At least give them

the address.

Girl, you look so good

somebody ought to

put you on a plate,

sop you up with a biscuit.

You know...

Black awareness week

is an opportunity

for self-expression.

May we leave now?

Wait!

Randy attempted

to express himself

through song,

in his own unique way,

but the song

makes a good point.

The children

are our future.

It's up to all of us

to provide a place

where children

can express themselves.

We need to rebuild

Lincoln park.

Ushers are passing through

the aisles

with donation baskets.

Please, give all you can.

We're happy to get

the kind of money that jingles,

but we'd rather get

the kind that folds.

Donations!

I thought

it was the trash!

Don't be hitting

on me!

Stupid ass!

I'll whop

your ass!

Tall, black

motherfucker.

There's women

up inside.

Thank you.

She is wonderful.

Akeem...

Shhh!

You can see Lisa

and Mr. McDowell

at McDowell's restaurant,

8507 queens boulevard.

8507 queens boulevard.

All right, fellas.

Every morning you'll

sweep this walkway.

Then I want you

to wash all the windows.

And don't leave

no streaks.

Hey!

What are you doing?

Get the hell out of here

before I bust that camera!

Look...

Me and the McDonald's people

got this little

misunderstanding.

See, they're McDonald's...

I'm McDowell's.

They got

the golden arches,

mine is

the golden arcs.

Heh, heh.

They got the big Mac,

I got the big Mick.

We both got

two all-beef patties,

special sauce, lettuce,

cheese, pickles and onions,

but they use

a sesame seed bun.

My buns have no seeds.

I got it.

Now...

You gotta mop this area

twice a day.

You know how to mop?

Yes,

of course.

There you go.

Don't use the bucket,

it'll just confuse you.

When you get through here,

you take out the trash.

Come with me.

I've got an easy job for you.

Hi!

Hello.

Hello!

Hi.

I am akeem.

It's nice to meet you,

akeem.

I have recently been placed

in charge of garbage.

Do you have any?

No. It's totally empty.

When it fills up,

don't be afraid to call me.

I will take it out

most urgently.

That's good to know.

When you think of garbage,

think of akeem!

Well, um...

I have to get back

to my sanitation duties.

Maybe we'll have a chance

again to talk

on a professional level.

Good-bye, akeem.

♪ Just let

your soul glow, baby ♪

♪ feeling

so silky smooth ♪

♪ just let it shine through ♪

♪ just let

your soul glow ♪♪

Soul glo.

Darryl!

Cleo.

You're looking sharp,

kid.

How about

a Mick shake?

I believe strawberry

is your favorite.

Straw.

Lisa is in the back.

She's waiting

for you.

Come on.

So how's everything

over at soul glo?

Fine.

Our home weave products

are taking off.

Good.

Dad isn't using

the company tickets

to the jets game.

I thought

you might enjoy them.

That's very considerate.

Thank you.

Lisa!

Look who's here, honey.

Hi!

You two kids

have a good time, you hear?

Ready?

Sure.

Listen, I want to

ask you something.

The other day

at the rally,

somebody stuffed

a large amount of cash

into one of the boxes.

You wouldn't know

who that was, would you?

Well, I......

I thought it was you!

You know me...

Anything for

the kids.

Hi, guys!

Hello!

I got four tickets

to the St. John's game.

Maybe your sister

will bring somebody.

Hey, take this,

will you?

Excuse me.

Hey!

It's kunta kinte!

Ha ha!

Ha ha!

Ha ha!

What can I do

for you, boy?

Can you make my hair

look like this?

What do you want

your hair to look

like that for?

I like the way

you wear your hair.

I wish more children

would wear their hair

like Martin Luther King.

You ain't never seen Dr. king

with no messy jeri curl.

Right? Dr. king ain't come

walkin' around like that.

You know, I met.

Dr. Martin Luther King once.

You lying.

You never met him.

Yes, I met him in 1962

in Memphis, Tennessee.

I was walking,

minding my own business.

I walk around the corner,

man walk up,

hit me in my chest.

I fall on the ground,

look up,

it's Dr. king.

He said, "oops, I thought"

you were somebody else."

You never met him!

Yes!

No! No!

Yes!

Why worry

about how you look?

I am trying to interest

a young lady.

No woman loves a man

'cause of his hair.

That's right!

An American girl?

Yes.

You got to

go through her papa.

Ain't got nothing to do with

your hair or your pocket.

Get in good with her father.

Ain't that right?

Right.

Get in good with the father,

you home free.

Home free.

Like a bird.

Mr. McDowell!

What is it?

Sir, I was wondering,

did you catch

the professional

football contest

on television

last night?

No, I didn't.

The giants of New York took on

the packers of green bay.

The giants triumphed

by kicking a pigskin ball

through a big "h".

A most ripping victory.

Son, I'm just going to tell you

this one time.

Yes?

You want to keep working,

stay off the drugs.

Yes!

I don't know

how it is in Africa,

but here rich guys

get all the chicks.

Yes, he must

work very hard.

The prince

of soul glo

work hard?

No way!

He lives off

his father's invention.

He could buy her

anything he wants.

How are you gonna

compete with that?

♪ You're on my mind ♪

♪ morning, noon,

and nighttime ♪

♪ the way

you touch my body ♪

♪ girl, it felt so fine ♪

♪ a little lower ♪

♪ yeah,

that drives me crazy ♪

♪ do your own wicked

thing to me ♪

♪ come on,

blow my... ♪

♪ Mind ♪

I'll get it!

♪ I like it

like that ♪

♪ seven days a week ♪

♪ till you get weak ♪

♪ I like it

like that... ♪

Delivery for

miss Lisa McDowell.

I'll take it.

I'm her sister.

Would you sign here,

please?

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ I like it

like that ♪

♪ ooh ♪

What is it?

Something for you.

Do you mind

if I open it?

Whoa!

Think they're real?

They couldn't be.

"From an admirer,

not Darryl."

Somebody

is messing around!

I am not.

An admirer is not going to

give you earrings like that

unless you give him

some Booty!

Not everybody

thinks like you, patrice.

Yes, they do.

They just

don't admit it.

♪ When you scream ♪

♪ I like it ♪

♪ I like it...

Like it ♪♪

I have not had sex

since we got to America.

Semmi, look.

There she is.

I am going to

talk to her.

Tell her you sent

the $500,000 earrings.

Then she will fall

into your arms,

and we can leave.

I cannot do that,

but I have a plan.

You'll mop your way

into her heart?

That is not fair.

Doing manual labor

is not fair.

I badly need

a manicure.

Listen to you!

"I badly need

a manicure."

Are you going to speak?

Hey, akeem!

Yes!

This is my sister,

patrice.

Hello!

Akeem is from Africa.

Why are you

in New York?

I'm a student.

What school?

I go to the university.

Which one?

The university

of the United States.

I never heard

of that.

It is

a small university.

We do not have

a basketball team.

We got an extra ticket

for the St. John's game.

Want to come?

Yes.

You can double date

with me and Darryl.

Yeah!

Put it!

Yeah!

Yes! Yes!

In his face!

Yes! In the face!

Take off

your jacket, akeem.

Put it

in the face, right?

I like this.

Isn't that better?

Yes. Thank you

very much.

Wearing clothes must be

a new experience for you.

Are you able

to follow the game, akeem?

Yes!

I am following

the game quite well.

What kind of games

do you play

in Africa?

Chase

the monkey?

No. Football.

You call it soc! Cer.

Yeah.

Soccer.

That's a real

cute sport...

Especially the way

you bounce that ball

off your heads.

I don't like sports

where you don't

use your hands.

Yes!

Yes!

What are you doing?

It's just halftime.

This is my favorite

part of the game.

Will you excuse me

for a moment?

I'll be back in a minute.

My goodness!

My goodness,

it is you!

I cannot

believe it!

Greetings,

Your Highness.

Please, please,

stop bowing.

I'm a loyal citizen

of Zamunda.

You'll spill

your beverages.

This is the greatest

day of my life.

Yes. It was very nice

meeting you, too.

Excuse me.

Please! Please!

May I just have

my picture taken with you?

I will Cherish

this experience

for the rest

of my life.

Thank you.

The rest of my life.

Who was that?

Just a man I met

in the restroom.

Sweetheart, why don't

you quit this job?

Because

I like it here.

But you're my lady.

My lady doesn't

have to work.

I'll take care

of you.

I'll get you

anything you want.

What can I get you?

Nothing!

I'll get you some...

Coffee.

I'll be

right back.

Ok.

Akeem,

did you have

a good time

at the game?

Yes, thank you.

I hope Darryl

didn't offend you.

Sometimes he

can be obnoxious.

He cannot help it.

Sit down.

Take a break.

Thank you.

You know, you're

a very unusual guy.

I've never seen

anybody take

so much pride

in mopping

a floor.

"He who would learn"

to fly one day

must first learn

"to stand and walk."

One cannot fly into flying.

That's Nietzsche.

That's what I mean.

The guys who work here

don't quote Nietzsche.

Everybody shut up

and do like I say!

Get the money out!

Stay cool!

Nobody gets hurt!

Take the money out!

Don't stall me, fat boy!

Let's go!

Come on!

You're wasting my time!

Come on!

Anybody move, I'll blow

your fucking head off.

What are you looking at?

Come on!

Stop stalling!

Come on!

Don't stall me!

Come on! Come on!

Excuse me

for a moment.

It would

be wise to put

the weapon down.

Who the fuck

is this asshole?

Refrain from using any further

obscenities in the presence

of these people.

What?

I'll be forced

to thrash you.

Fuck you!

Freeze, you diseased

rhinoceros pizzle!

Hey, fellas.

I'm real proud of the job

you did in there today.

We've been hit

by that guy five times.

I got a feeling

he won't come back,

thanks to my...

African connection.

Ha ha ha!

Leave Sunday

night open.

I'm having a little

get-together at my house.

You see?

It is working!

He has accepted us

as equals.

Just give them a ticket,

take their keys,

park the cars

down the street.

When you're finished,

come inside and help

in the kitchen.

Akeem, I want to

show you the inside

of McDowell's

little castle.

This here is

my showplace.

I think it pretty much

speaks for itself.

You know something, akeem?

When I was growing up,

nine of us lived in a shack

no bigger than this room.

Look what

I have today.

Only wish Mrs. McDowell

could have lived to see it.

You have

a fine house, sir.

Thank you.

In 20 or 30 years,

with hard work,

maybe you can have

a place like this

for yourself.

That would be something.

Wouldn't it?

This is where

you'll be working tonight.

Ever open

a champagne bottle?

I have seen it

done before.

Good. Make sure you keep

all the glasses full.

I better get dressed.

Make yourself comfortable

till the guests arrive.

You see, I love the lord.

You understand

what I'm sayin'?

I love the lord.

If lovin' the lord

is wrong,

I don't wanna

be right.

Glad you could

make it.

Drink up.

Lots more where

that came from.

Randy,

how's everything?

Good to see you.

Watch out

for this guy.

Big ed!

My man!

I can appreciate

the way

you handled that dude

with the gun.

I would have

helped you myself,

except I was holding

a cup of coffee.

You understand,

right?

I bet you learned that

fighting lions and

tigers and shit.

Yes. Where I'm from,

we have to be

very aggressive.

I'm all for that.

Especially

with women.

They may not

admit it,

but they all

want a man to...

Take charge...

Tell them

what to do.

♪ You pick me up ♪

♪ pick me up ♪

♪ when I'm down... ♪♪

That's one thing

I wanted to talk to you...

Darryl, your mother

gets lovelier

every time I see her.

I'd like to talk to you

alone for a minute.

Excuse us.

Mom, dad,

grandma.

Sure, son.

McDonald's

has better fries,

but I'd never tell.

Mr. McDowell that.

Akeem, make sure everybody's

glass is kept full.

We're about to make

a very special announcement.

Yes, sir.

May I have everyone's

attention, please?

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

Mr. and Mrs. jenks,

please join me.

And mother jenks,

you come up here, too.

I've just heard news

that makes me

a very happy man.

Semmi, please.

Champagne.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Ok. Go on.

Get out of here.

As you all know,

Darryl and Lisa have been

going together

for quite some time.

I'm pleased to announce

that a few moments ago,

Darryl popped

the big question...

And Lisa happily accepted.

So as it turns out,

this has become

an engagement party.

Amen! Praise

the lord!

Ha ha ha!

Married?

To the bride

and groom.

To the bride and groom!

To the bride

and groom!

I want you

and that young man

to tie that knot.

I'm gonna pray for you.

Hold onto god's

unchanging hand

because he helped

Joshua fight the

battle of Jericho!

He helped Daniel get

out of the lion's den!

He helped gilligan get

off the island! Lord!

I want to talk

to you now.

The next time you and my father

decide to plan my life,

let me in on it!

It's not...

Don't touch me!

Baby, it's our

engagement party.

Thanks.

Would you like

some champagne?

No, thanks. I really

don't feel like celebrating.

Wait.

Sit down and

keep me company.

If you're going

to hang out with me,

you gotta loosen up.

I can be loose.

See?

Much better.

Are you all right?

I'm fine.

I won't be

pressured into marriage,

not by Darryl

or my father or anybody.

I understand completely.

In my country,

they arrange many marriages.

No one should get married

out of obligation.

Right. How could

I have considered

marrying a guy

like Darryl?

I wondered

the same thing.

He just made me

so furious back there.

You don't think

I overreacted, do you?

The first reaction

is usually the correct one.

You know, you're

very easy to talk to.

I feel like I could

tell you anything.

Akeem, we need some more

champagne over here.

I almost forgot that I was here

in a domestic capacity.

Thanks for

listening to me.

I really

appreciate it.

Anytime,

Lisa McDowell.

Hey, be careful.

I think my sister

likes you.

Semmi.

Semmi.

Come now, my friend,

you'll be late

for work.

So what if I am?

We cannot afford

to anger Mr. McDowell now.

Especially since things

are going well with Lisa.

I do not care.

I'm not going

to work today.

Yes, you are.

I'm sick of

living like a peasant.

Look at this filth!

You want

to live better? Fine.

Fix this place up.

But you are

going to work today.

Hello!

Hi!

I started on cleanup

just like you guys,

but now

I'm washing lettuce.

Soon I'll be on fries,

then the grill.

A year or two,

I make

assistant manager.

That's where

the big bucks start

rolling in.

Just two years?

Maybe I stayed

with him because

everyone expected me to.

You know what I mean?

You must be tired of hearing

about my problems with Darryl.

No, not at all.

I feel like

I owe you a favor.

Come to my house.

I'll fix you dinner.

Patrice

will be there.

Let us go

to my house.

Why?

I'd like

to cook for you.

You? Cook?

I dabble a little.

Great! I'll buy

the groceries.

Fine. But I have to

warn you...

My home is very poor.

I don't care

about that.

I'd love to see

where you live.

Welcome to

my humble abode.

This is 2-1-2.

Akeem!

What's wrong?

Nothing's wrong.

Everything's fine.

Excuse me for a moment.

What have you done?

You told me

to fix up the place.

I should kill you!

Why?

I'm supposed to be poor!

Akeem?

Is everything

all right?

Everything

is fine.

Excuse me.

I have to tidy up.

Hey, do you smoke?

Take care of your lungs.

They're only human.

What are you doing?

Do not take

my pocket money.

If you have

no more money,

you can cause

no more mischief.

You're unreasonable!

If you have ruined

my chances with Lisa,

I will never forgive you!

I am very sorry.

Can we go in now?

No.

Why not?

There is

a big rat inside.

I think

there is no rat.

I think

you're so ashamed

of your apartment,

you can't even

let me see it.

Once again,

you have judged correctly.

If it bothers you

that much,

we can go out to eat.

That would be much better.

Excuse me

for a moment, please.

What did you give him?

I just gave him

some pocket change.

Randolph!

Leave me alone,

Mortimer.

Randolph! Randolph!

I'm still not

talking to you.

Look!

Mortimer...

We're back.

Yeah.

To America.

♪ I can't stop trying... ♪

Why'd you come here?

To find

something special.

It's an awfully

long way to travel.

No journey is too great

when one finds

what he seeks.

Does everyone in Africa

talk like you?

Do you not like it?

No, I love it.

It's nice to be

with a man

who knows how

to express himself.

Thank you! Thank you!

Let's have lunch.

♪ Oooh, baby, baby... ♪

You have the most

amazing effect on people.

No, I don't.

It's true. Look at that guy

at the basketball game.

People love you.

♪ Ooh, ooohh... ♪♪

I bet

where you're from

women practically

throw themselves

at your feet.

Why do you say that?

Because you have

a kind of inner glow,

like... you're

above anything petty.

It's almost regal.

So what did you do

back home?

Back home

I was... I...

I was in

the family business.

What's that?

Goat herding.

Yes, yes.

Really?

Does this

surprise you?

No. It's just

that you seem

so educated.

The life of a goat herd

is not that demanding.

Goats take care

of themselves,

leaving a man

with time to read.

Please let me.

That's not right.

I should pay.

You should stop worrying

about being poor.

If I wanted a wealthy guy,

I'd be with Darryl,

not you.

Would you like

to dance?

Yes.

♪ Someone to care ♪

♪ someone to share ♪

♪ lonely hours ♪

♪ and the moments

of despair ♪

♪ to be loved,

to be loved ♪

♪ ooh, ♪

♪ what a feeling ♪

♪ to be loved ♪

♪ someone to kiss... ♪

What about patrice?

I am not interested

in patrice.

♪ When you're away... ♪

What about Darryl?

I am not interested

in Darryl, either.

♪ Ooh,

what a feeling ♪

♪ to be loved ♪

♪ some wish to be... ♪♪

You actually

want to send this?

Why? What is wrong?

Read it to me.

"To his majesty"

king jaffe joffer,

"the royal palace,"

Zamunda.

"Sire, akeem and i"

have depleted our funds.

"Kindly send"

300,000 American dollars

immediately,

"as we are"

in dire straits.

Your humble servant,

"semi."

Semmi.

Semmi.

Should I make it

400,000?

You think

that'd be enough?

You are right.

500,000.

As long as you're asking,

go for a cool million.

You do not think

that would be too much?

Naah.

Ok. What's going on?

Patrice!

I came to see akeem.

What are you two

involved in?

You can't afford

all this stuff

on your salary.

♪ Someone to kiss ♪

♪ someone to miss ♪

♪ when you're away ♪

♪ through here,

gone each day ♪

♪ to be loved,

to be loved ♪

♪ wow! What a feeling ♪

♪ to be loved ♪

♪ some wish to be

a king or a queen ♪

♪ some wish

for fortune and fame ♪

Shut up!

♪ But to be truly ♪

♪ truly, truly,

truly loved... ♪

♪ ...of these things ♪

♪ whoa ♪

♪ someone to care ♪

♪ someone to share ♪

♪ lonely hours ♪

♪ and moments

of despair... ♪

♪ To be loved,

to be loved ♪

♪ wow! What a feeling ♪♪

Semmi, I had

the most wonderful...

Hi, akeem.

Semmi told me

everything.

Sorry things

didn't work out

between you

and me, but...

You understand.

Good night...

Sweet prince.

Remember,

you must not

tell a soul.

Your secret is safe

with me, Your Highness.

Bye.

If you're the prince,

then who am I?

My servant?

Boy, they smell good!

That Darryl must be spending

a fortune on flowers.

Stay out of this, dad.

Where you going?

To a museum

with akeem.

I don't like that

one bit.

What's wrong with akeem?

Lisa, you told me

yourself.

He's a goat herder.

Why don't you

marry Darryl?

He dresses real nice,

treats you real good.

You only like Darryl

because he's rich.

I don't want you to struggle

the way your mother and I did.

I know.

Bye, daddy.

Bye.

Come in.

You boys wanted

to see me?

Mr. townsend, we would

like to change apartments.

God damn!

What the hell have you

done in here?

Semmi has altered

the apartment.

We'd like

to exchange it.

Is this stuff hot?

No. I'm going to bring

a young lady up,

and I can't let her

see me living like this.

I'm going to let you boys

stay in my apartment,

and I'll move up here.

Does your apartment

look poor?

Yeah, it's a real

shit-hole. You'll love it.

Here are the keys.

It's apartment 1A,

downstairs, first floor.

Thank you.

You are too kind.

Semmi,

move our things.

I have a date with Lisa!

Isn't that wonderful?

Who in the hell

is that?

Hey, what's up,

brother?

You a little late

for the Christmas

pageant.

I'm king jaffe joffer,

ruler of Zamunda.

Have a seat.

Chair number two will be

ready in a second.

This is beautiful!

What is that?

Velvet?

I have come

for my son akeem.

Come for who?

You know, kunta

from up...

Kunta.

The boy upstairs.

Yeah, him!

He live upstairs

on the fifth floor.

Hey! Who gonna clean up

all these flowers?

You may enter.

You are not akeem.

I know that.

What is this?

A photograph.

What is this McDowell's?

It's a place over

on queens boulevard.

He works there.

My son works?

Where is he now?

I don't know.

He moved downstairs,

apartment 1A.

Aah!

Your majesty...

What are you doing here?

I received your telegram.

Where is akeem?

He went out.

How was your flight?

Your only job

was to look

after akeem.

How could you

let him come

to such a pass?

Akeem will not listen.

He's gone quite mad.

Semmi...

You have

disgraced yourself,

and you must

be punished.

Confine yourself

to our royal suite

at the Waldorf-astoria.

And see that he puts on

some decent attire.

And I want you

to bathe him thoroughly.

Thank you,

your majesty!

Look, Zamunda!

Isn't that

where you're from?

Yes.

What's it like?

You would love it there.

It's the most beautiful

place on earth

the people

are very friendly,

and you... you

they would treat

like a queen.

Akeem.

People are

going to see us.

Let them see.

Lisa, let us go.

Now?

Yes.

Right now.

Yeah, well,

look, Darryl.

Why don't you come by

the house tonight?

Yeah, about 9:00.

Lisa will be home

by then.

Yeah, look. Don't worry

about it, buddy.

We'll work something out.

Ok, see you later.

Mr. McDowell?

Yeah?

There's some people

to see you.

They're not

from McDonald's,

are they?

I don't think so.

How can I help you?

Oha.

This is king

jaffe joffer,

ruler of Zamunda.

He is searching

for his son akeem.

Your son?

Yes, my son

the prince.

A prince?

Are you serious?

Prince akeem is heir

to the throne of Zamunda.

I knew there was

somethin' special

about that boy.

You know

where he is?

Yes, he's out

with my lovely

daughter Lisa.

I'm staying at

the Waldorf-astoria.

Call if you see him.

I'll tell him

you're here.

Do not alert him to my presence.

I'll deal with him.

For your trouble.

Well,

thank you,

your royalness.

A prince! Ha!

Wait!

What?

We cannot go in.

Why not?

Wait in the car.

I will be right back.

We must leave.

I don't care

about the apartment.

I just feel like

I'm rushing you.

No, you're not.

It's better

if we take our time.

But I want to.

It's better

if I take you home.

Look

who's here!

Akeem, it's good

to see you!

It is good to

see you, too, sir.

Come inside.

Have a drink.

I have to get going.

You got time

for one drink.

Get out

of here, dog.

We don't spend

enough time talkin'.

Perhaps some

other time.

I have to go.

I'll be right back

with that drink.

Yeah, king jaffe joffer's

room, please.

Yeah, hello, king.

Yeah, Cleo McDowell here.

Yeah, king, both the kids

are here... together.

Right.

2432 derby Avenue,

Jamaica estates.

Right.

Now, king,

I was wondering if...

Hello, king.

I really

have to go, sir.

No, no.

Have a seat.

Did you want ice?

I'll be back.

Well,

who was that?

...jehovah's witness.

Excuse me.

Look. The girl

doesn't like you anymore!

Get that through

your greasy head!

You said

to come over...

Where were we?

I warned you,

didn't I?

Dottie, get him!

Hey!

Stop!

Get down!

Sir, I really appreciate

your hospitality,

but I have to get going.

You can stay

a little longer.

I put some delicious

hors d'oeuvres

in the oven... son.

Let me see

if they're ready.

Lisa, I must leave.

Is something

wrong, akeem?

I will tell you

when the time

is right.

Tell your father

good-bye for me.

Where's akeem?

He said

he had to leave.

He can't leave!

What is going on,

and why are you

suddenly being

so nice to akeem?

I like the boy!

What are you up to?

What? Nothing!

A man's got a right

to change his mind.

Daddy...

You two make

a beautiful

couple, Lisa.

Daddy!

He's a real

fine young man!

Dad!

Ok, Lisa, he's rich!

He is rich!

What?

He's got

his own money,

and when I say he's

got his own money,

I mean the boy has

got his own money!

A prince!

He's a prince!

Lisa, you did it

this time!

You hit the jackpot!

Your goat herder

makes Darryl look

like a welfare case!

I will get out here.

That will be

nine bucks.

Semmi!

Good news, akeem.

We've been rescued.

Where are my parents?

They've gone

to the McDowell's house.

Come with me.

Where we going?

Back to queens.

Well, look who's here!

Come in! Come in!

Welcome to

casa de McDowell's.

Just come right in.

Where is akeem?

He just

stepped out.

He went for a pizza.

You know these youngsters.

This must be

your lovely wife.

How are you?

Very well,

thank you.

Should I

shake your hand

or bow or what?

I feel like

break-dancin'.

Come in.

Have a seat.

Take a load off.

Akeem will be back soon.

Here. Try the la-z-boy.

It is very nice.

Put your feet up.

Try a pig in a blanket.

They're the frozen kind,

but you'd never know it.

You said

my son was here!

My daughter Lisa

might know

where he went.

Akeem and Lisa

have gotten close.

I must speak to

your daughter at once!

Lisa?

There's someone

here to see you.

This is

akeem's father,

the king!

Leave us.

I understand

you're seeing

my son.

I was seeing him.

Then you know

about his wife.

He's married?

He will be.

We've already

chosen his bride.

So you see,

akeem could not

be at all serious

about you.

Akeem came

to America

to sow

his royal oats.

Excuse me.

I need to be alone.

Are you comfortable,

miss...

What should

I call you?

My name's Cleo.

It is nice

meeting you.

My name is aoleon.

A-oleon...

A-aleon, a...

Lisa,

where you goin'?

Come meet the queen.

Are you all right, dear?

I'm sorry...

I have to

get out of here.

What's the matter, baby?

Hey, what did you say

to my daughter?

I told her

the truth...

Akeem is not

interested in her.

You can't be sure.

Our son cannot

consort with

such a girl.

Wait a minute!

Oha.

I know you have

been inconvenienced.

I am prepared

to compensate you.

Shall we say

one million

American dollars?

No way!

Then two million.

You can't buy

my daughter off.

Nonsense!

Jaffe, apologize

to Mr. McDowell.

The man

is beneath me

and so is

his daughter.

I don't care

who you are!

Say another word

about Lisa,

and I'll break

my foot off

in your royal ass!

Pardon me?

What's everybody

yelling about?

The prince

loves Lisa,

but the king

can't handle it!

The prince loves me.

Are you all right?

Yes, mother,

I am fine.

You're hugging

the servant.

He's the prince.

Who told you that?

You mean akeem's

the prince?

Yeah, and

he loves Lisa.

How come she always

gets the good ones?

Where is Lisa?

Your daddy here

just ran her off!

What did

you tell her?

It is of no

consequence.

We shall return

to Zamunda.

I will not leave

without Lisa.

You do care?

Mother... I love her.

Then go after her.

Akeem!

Akeem, I forbid you!

Put a sock in it.

He's in love.

Darryl,

what happened?

Lisa dumped me.

I know.

You poor thing.

Let's get you

out of these

wet clothes.

Stop!

Lisa!

Lisa!

I will be fine

by myself.

Lisa, please.

I did not mean

to hurt you.

Well, at least

I know who

gave me these.

Well, you can keep them

because I don't want them

and I don't

want you!

Lisa. Lisa.

Look, just

leave me alone!

Lisa, please.

I love you.

What about the woman

you're marrying?

I do not love her.

Why do you think I'm here?

Your father told me...

To sow your royal oats!

I came to America

to find my bride.

I came to queens

to find you.

Why didn't you

just tell me

you were a prince?

So you'd love me

for myself.

I'm not sure

who you are.

I'm the man

you fell in love with.

Should it matter

that I'm a prince?

It shouldn't,

but I...

Say you didn't love me

when you thought

I was a goat herder,

and I won't

bother you again.

It just

wouldn't work out.

We're too different.

You're royalty,

for god's sake!

I will renounce

my throne.

I renounce my throne!

I'm no longer

prince of Zamunda!

I renounce my throne!

Does this

make you happy?

I can't let you

do that.

I do not care

about my crown.

All I care about

is you.

Marry me, Lisa.

So what do

you think?

Go on, honey!

Take a chance!

Look. I'm sorry.

I can't.

Good-bye, akeem.

If you're really a prince,

I'll marry you.

Look at it this way.

At least we learned

how to make French fries.

You're still

not speaking to me?

I only want our son

to be happy.

So do I. Aoleon, please.

It is out of our hands.

The girl told him no.

After the way

you treated her,

who blames her?

They could not

marry anyway.

It is against

the tradition.

Well, it is

a stupid tradition.

Who am I

to change it?

I thought

you were the king.

Your Highness...

We have not

come to that part yet.

Your Highness...

Your Highness...

Would you have given up

all of this for me?

Yes. If you like,

we can give it up now.

Nah!

Wait a minute.

Wait. Stop right there.

Listen. Stop

right there a minute.

Man goes into a restaurant...

You listenin'?

A man goes

into a restaurant.

He's having

a bowl of soup.

He says to the waiter,

"taste the soup."

Waiter says,

"is there something wrong?"

He says,

"taste the soup."

He says, "is it too hot?"

He says, "will you"

just taste the soup?"

"All right,"

I'll taste the soup.

"Where's the spoon?"

"Aha!

Aha!"

What do you know

from funny, you bastard?

♪ Say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ America ♪

♪ America ♪

♪ America ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ I took a plane

to sunny Spain ♪

♪ I crossed the desert

in the camel train ♪

♪ had to see the sights

in gay Paris ♪

♪ but there's a land

more wonderful to me ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ hey! ♪

♪ I've been to Kenya ♪

♪ and walked

in Hyde park ♪

♪ I've seen Copenhagen ♪

♪ after dark

with my baby ♪

♪ I met the pope

at the Vatican ♪

♪ I've seen Ghana, Tijuana,

and the sea of Japan ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ you can travel

'round the world ♪

♪ see lots of boys

and girls ♪

♪ meet different people

on the way, yeah! ♪

♪ But there's nothing

like the U.S.A. ♪

♪ Say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ coming to America ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ first stop

New York City ♪

♪ all the girls

are pretty ♪

♪ next stop Miami ♪

♪ everybody was jammin' ♪

♪ I bought a ticket to L.A. ♪

♪ That's the perfect way ♪

♪ everyone in the world

is coming to the U.S. ♪

♪ "A" ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ the land

of opportunity ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ hold on,

I'm coming ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ coming to America ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ coming to America ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ land of opportunity ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ say can you see ♪

♪ I'm coming to America ♪

♪ hold on,

I'm coming ♪

Translation and subtitles by
PEPPER & LALASPAIN
*** SONG LIVES FOR EVER ***