Chameleon (2008) - full transcript
The protagonist of this film is a con artist with ability to change depending on the environment and emotions of those around him. He leads of a group of street crooks, one day they witnesses the kidnapping of a man at the hands of a suspicious group of individuals.
''The characters and events of
this story are entirely fictional''
l'm a serious Astrologist.
l don't hold hands to read palms
l'm not here to be harassed.
Go away
l have this little problem
What is it?
Aging
Aging?
The problem with aging...
What star sign are you?
Oh, l'm hardly a star,
l'm from nowhere...
Get lost
l'm worried...
about premature aging
l get wasted on 3 drinks
and buy up lottery tickets...
About your little problem.
Can you still get it up?
You're fine
l'm the one worried...
about aging
l'm starting to sag a little.
Know what l mean?
Getting up in the morning
is a real drag...
Starting to feel my age...
Don't you worry.
You're still really hot
lf you can be such a sweetheart,
why didn't you just seduce me?
Man, you're moody
How to deal with my
many moods...
For your pension plan
Wow, so much?
Hey!
l figured out your sign
You're a Chameleon
''CHAMELEON''
The moment we've
all been waiting for
Here come the bride and the groom
Please give them a warm welcome!
No way. The guy's super hot
Unbelievable
With that old bag?
For her daddy's money
-A gigolo
-Her whole family's tacky
Which is what bring us here
The honorable father of the bride,
Midorikawa Hisanori,
is the fabled inheritor
from Tokyo...
lnvestor
The fabled investor,
and his daughter, Yukie,
while serving for many years
as her father's accomplice...
Accountant
Accountant,
drove her beloved Jaguar,
and traveled the world...
l'm Sakai Kenzo,
Marketing Director,
Yamamura Trading
About the bridegroom,
Harukawa Kosuke
Although losing his parents
and orphaned in this world,
he has matured into
a fine citizen,
distinguishing himself in my...
Now it's time to cut
the wedding cake...
Just a minute.
Come closer, everybody
You in the back, hurry up!
Still ordering us around...
May the happy couple
launch their love...
Not so fast!
Wedding cake, darn!
Turn on the lights!
Harukawa, if you
can afford all this crap,
you can sure pay me back, now!
Hey! Lights on, now!
Please, not here
Just who are you?
l'll tell you
l have the singular honor of
representing the Kikuei Clan
Harukawa here, is a moron,
who borrowed 5 million yen
from our loan shark operation,
without paying back
a yen of interest!
l'll pay you, l will!
Just go home...
Shut up! Hurry up and pay!
Daddy!
Dear...
Harukawa! How stupid can you be,
borrowing money from a gang!
l have no use for
an employee like you!
Noriko, we're going home.
Sakai, fire Harukawa!
Right! Your judgment is correct
Sir, are you really going home?
Madam!
Sir!
Kosuke, you can't let this happen!
Dear guests, please remain calm.
As long as their love is strong...
Who asked you!
You can't even keep your
insults consistent!
Darn!
Please, stop!
Darn you!
-Don't touch her!
-Let go, pay up!
Stop!
Stupid!
That's enough!
Get outside!
Don't worry, everyone
Come out!
Sure, Daddy, l loaned Kosuke money
But that was because l knew
how much he relied on me
His love for me was so pure
he barely held my hand...
You're the one that's too pure!
You're not legally married yet
Who knows how much
they'll blackmail him for
Take all the cash wedding gifts
as your severance pay!
l'm very sorry
My apologies
l detested you from the start!
You're a lowlife that
stinks like rotten fish!
Go away
Now!
-Nice job
-Nice job
Here's our ''severance pay''
Hey, a real stash of cash!
ldiot
Act normal
They're cops
They knew
They're not cops
How can you tell?
Wait!
l was tricked! l was tricked!
That's not true. Please, calm down
Let's go
Oh, hello.
Yes, we're on for tomorrow
Darn you!
What the heck was that about?
They didn't look like yakuza
You're a yakuza, right?
No, you're just a thug
Shut up
From Yamada Miho
10,000 Yen. Cheap guest
Matsunaga...
Can't read it
Nice job
No wrap party?
My idiot Bro's waiting
l want to drink
Sorry, 4 hours left
on the slot machines
Hey, Blackie!
l miss the good old days
What?
''Loyal to None Entertainment''
Morning
Morning
Good morning, everyone
Hey, Goro, did l play it
a little over the top yesterday?
Not at all.
You're always very impressive
Good morning
Your fee for
yesterday's performance
Always appreciated
That's right, we're just happy
to still have roles to play
Thank you for yesterday, sir
Nice job. Thanks
Noriko san, here's yours
Thanks
The breakdown on yesterday's take,
was 4 million yen in cash gifts,
and 1 .5 million for the honeymoon
and apartment rental
Which means each of us
get 780,000 yen
Kosuke, you're saving up, right?
Keep more for yourself,
you're the lead
No, l get my fair share
Now, about the next job
Which one?
Today, l'm meeting the mark
for that wedding, next month
The next troupe performance,
will be at the Toyu Supermarket,
starting at 1 1AM. Sorry it's early
The Tenku Theater Troupe?
We're still negotiating
a guest appearance for you
Sorry you have to handle
our performances
Hey, consider me your manager
Our manager...
Manager
Hey, manager
''Yamamura Theater Troupe''
Grandpa Shu,
Grandma Nori,
Grandpa Ken
Want to take my meds?
You haven't taken any in a while
Actually, mine ran out, too
lf you're that worried about
throat cancer,
quit smoking
Leave me alone
Goro
l'm in bad shape
Go get some medication
That woman we're meeting
with today
That woman? You mean, the mark
l'm in love with her
Let me be clear
You mean, personally?
l'm serious, l'm in love with her
Leave all this behind?
l thought you were saving money
to follow in your dad's footsteps
Whatever. What about money?
Neither of us can make it
in the real world anymore
Anymore!
Welcome
Sorry l'm late.
l couldn't get away
That's fine...Let me introduce...
Hello, l'm Noda Goro
l'll be master of ceremonies at
your wedding. Congratulations
l'm telling you the truth today
l'm...
Actually, l suffer from depression
l came here from a small
fishing village and found a job
But l really struggled
He and l met, waiting in one of...
those long lines
at a psychiatric clinic
You could say we're the
Depressed Dudes
Just like today,
l always depend on Goro,
because l can turn into...
a different person
at a moment's notice
Um...
No, please hear him out
Honestly...Honestly...
l want to start over with you
Take you with me and go back
to the sea
Listen, l didn't know
how to tell you, either
l kept trying to tell you
but never could
l was never serious about us
You seemed so serious and quiet,
l felt so bad for you
lf we go any farther,
l'll break your heart
Sorry.
l know you paid for the dates
Find someone terrific. Bye!
Hey wait! You conned him!
''Kinouchi Psychiatric Clinic''
Thank you
You should wait 'til after you eat
What's up, Jun?
Listen to me! l saw it on TV...
Gosh! You couldn't even
collect today
100,000 yen only? ldiot!
And you want to join us?
l'm sorry!
Yesterday's basement garage!
Who you talking to!
That guy!
That guy!
Kosuke
Kosuke
Let's go home
Tatsuo
Let's go out
Tatsuo!
Hey, what?
We're going to go ahead and eat
Sure, go ahead
l'm sure hungry
We start with a report on
testimony at
a Parliamentary Hearing
Witness Atsugi
l stand here before you today,
not to respond to any allegations,
but in order to establish whether
or not these allegations
carry any truth at all
Getting to the point,
l have absolutely
no knowledge of this matter
Transportation Minister Atsugi was
scheduled to testify in Parliament
regarding allegations of bribery
Due to the
extraordinary disappearance...
of another key witness,
lshibashi Tomoyasu,
the Hearing was postponed
lshibashi, the planning director
for Japan Real Estate Corp,
has simply disappeared...
lt's him, right!
l couldn't believe it!
The Police have determined that
lshibashi is in some troubles
and have been investigating
his activities from yesterday...
They say the Minister's secretary
killed himself,
but they killed him
They killed that guy, too?
We're witnesses, right?
Think there's money in a tip-off?
Money?
Money...
Think we could get
1 million yen for a tip-off?
lf we do, they'll wipe us out
Then it's the cops
Like we can just go report
to the cops
Then it's off?
Forget it!
l'll be back, in due course
What's ''in due course'' mean?
Hey, watch it
''lf you're going to dance...''
''Dance the tap, tap,
wiretap dance''
''lf l don't make it back,
use this''
''Goro''
He knows
He's no dummy
Take me to your boss.
l want to talk to him
Yes, so,
you'll be in touch with the local
risk assessment section,
and we'll hire
an anti-terrorism specialist...
So l hear you're vegetarian
When Noda Goro was 10,
his parents lost their
interior decorating business
and walked out on
50 million yen in debt
and killed themselves
Goro was placed in what they
used to call an orphanage
When he was 1 4,
he slashed a contractor who
owed his parents with a knife,
landing him in reform school
That's where he met Ookita Tatsuo
and Yoshida Jun
After reform school,
he joined martial arts school,
got kicked out, hired by yakuza,
got kicked out, wound up
in Chinatown in L.A.,
as a bodyguard for the
Asian mafia, but after a year...
Let's not go that route
Paper-scissors-rock!
You got back to Japan...
3 years ago?
Yeah, well
You were 25
Since then?
l'd had a pretty active life,
so l became a regular slacker
A slacker,
who's depressed
and cons weddings
Which is why l've got
no credibility whatsoever
Even if l told them
l saw you there,
they'd ask me what l was doing
l'll shut up my 3 guys
No matter what,
l won't let them talk
So can't you leave us alone?
What do you mean,
''No matter what?''
You drugged or tortured
that witness, right?
He'll be dumped somewhere
tomorrow. Total amnesia
He'll never testify in Parliament
Where did you fight?
What?
Ex-fighters rub
their hands like that
To keep their heart
and lungs in shape
So, you were a fighter?
l only trained
You breathe even a word,
and you do know what
the punishment will be
To the marrow of my bones.
There's no way out
lt's not much, but take it
You've spared us the trouble
of executing you...
Not that we would
Who do you think l am?
Don't look down on me...
ls what l'd like to say,
but can't. How pathetic
Could l take 4 or 5 bills
for carfare?
''Who's behind me...''
l'm a serious Astrologist
l don't hold...
You're the chameleon...
How's your aging problem been?
Yourself?
Doesn't matter. You paid me
but l never told your fortune
Your birth date?
l think it was September 22...
More or less
More or less?
Won't work?
lt's fine, you're a Virgo. Hold on
Listen, if you have to
look it up in some books...
Look how thick this book is
lf l had the brains to memorize
this, l'd be in another business
Unbelievable
Shall l call an ambulance?
l'm fine.
l haven't eaten in a while
You're my first customer in 5 days
lt's hard to read
Want to go eat?
Don't order anymore eggs, please
That's your 7th or 8th egg
And stop mixing mustard
into your drink
lt's totally addictive
Can l ask your name?
What? My name?
Goro
Goro?
Rhymes with Gogo girl
Mine's Koike Keiko.
My name's all K's
l don't mean you,
but l have lousy luck with men
The guy l considered marrying
was a marriage con man
My parents said l was the fool
and cut me off
So now l'm broke
l decided to join the cons
That's why l tell fake fortunes
Keep the change
Thanks
Use this to go home
Hey! Don't insult me
ls what l'd like to say,
but can't. How pathetic
Hey!
Don't worry about me.
All of Tokyo's my pad
l can always crash
a massage parlor
Are you...
ls there...
a reason you don't
want to sleep with me?
The man taken into custody
on this bridge early this morning,
has been identified
as lshibashi Tomoyasu,
the missing Japan Real Estate
Corporation executive
Mr. lshibashi appears physically
unharmed and healthy,
but suffers from amnesia,
and is unresponsive to questions
from the police and his family
As a result,
the recently postponed...
l'm with the news desk.
Can l help?
Parliamentary Hearings will be
delayed further
Unbelievable
lt's good. Let's go with it!
Where was this?
The Oriental Plaza Hotel basement
When?
The afternoon before the Hearing.
You'll pay me right away, right?
l asked you to wait on that
10 million.
lf not, l'll take 1 million
l'll talk to my boss,
but you agree to
go on the show, right?
We'll conceal your face
and alter your voice
We'll shoot him in there
With the monitors behind him
The chair goes...
Goro, zip up your fly
lt hurts!
Hang in there, Granny
No, call the hospital
Hey, what's up!
This looks bad
Your son's car hit her at that
crosswalk with no streetlights
l asked a friend in the...
Department of Transportation,
who found out it's your son's car
He could be charged
with hit-and-run
Shall l call the police?
The timing's all wrong
What's going on?
According to Kosuke,
we don't have any marks
lined up for wedding fraud
Jun had a great idea
Just the sort of idea from
a yakuza in training
l'm not really into it.
lt's a one-note drama
l considered the ''fake-son'' con,
but it's not exactly our style
We put the mark on
some new millionaire,
and when his kid drives out
in some fancy car, bingo!
We offer a friendly settlement,
for at least 1 million
Who's she?
l heard you have a spare room
on the 2nd floor, practically free
She cons people, too
That's a little harsh
But your little scheme won't work
-Why not?
-Listen, with wedding fraud,
the marks have no idea
they've been tricked
With your scheme they'll know
they've been tricked
when the son comes
Oh, guess you're right
No, please hold on
This new millionaire with
the kid and the fancy car
Say, l stuff a pillow up
my dress and...
''lt's true!''
''He is your son, right?''
''He's definitely
my baby's father!''
''How can you be so cold?''
That's the pitch
All of you, Granny, Grandpa, too,
start crying
All my brothers are furious
and then it's your turn
You're training to be
a yakuza, right?
Yo, my older sister here...
Younger sister
Younger...
You think you can
get off knockin' up
my younger sister without paying?
This way, even when the son
comes home
after the panicked parents
have paid money,
they won't figure it out because
the son plays with lots of girls
And they won't go to the cops
Sounds like a really meaty role
Sounds like we got ourselves
a new young actress
A genius!
Being called a genius
is a little...
You had a hard time, didn't you?
Have you prayed for the baby?
l've been praying for mine,
all these 50 years
Grandma Nori, are you nuts?
lt's just a story she made up
lt's all right
Women use tears
to flush their pain
Then you'll be ready for new pain
OK?
What's all this about?
l want to party hard tonight
lt's time we all got
drunk together
What! For real!
lt's true!
For real!
l'll die, l'll die on you!
That's how they crashed
into our car
That's back when they were
seriously depressed
Kosuke and Goro were
And that's how we all
started living together here
ldiots!
l'm depressed!
Depressed! Depressed!
Enough to shoot you!
So, Kosuke's going back to the sea
to become a fisherman
lt'll fix his depression
lt's fixable!
A man of the sea!
Who? Who goes there?
Shut up
Who? Who goes there?
''As requested, l presumptuously
announce myself''
''l hail from the village
of Kunisada...''
Boss!
Hey Asa!
Should l die in obscurity here,
Kunisada Chuji's name
would be dishonored
''lf you're going to dance
the dance,''
''dance to the Song of Tokyo''
''ln the glorious capital''
''ln the middle of
the glorious capital...''
See ya
See ya
See ya
Hey, Jun, this way
Hey, Blackie
Kosuke
''Witness Saw lshibashi Kidnapped''
''Midtown Hotel
Afternoon before Hearing''
Hey, kitty, hey
''Witness to Kidnapping
in Hotel Basement Lot''
''Mystery Man
Delivers Evidence to TV Station''
''A man delivered
recorded evidence to NMN TV,''
''shortly before lshibashi...''
lt's me. l'm the one that did that
From that drawer
l didn't give it to them.
l ran away
Kosuke...
Money... l needed a lot
of money right away
What's the rush?
l got a call from Mom yesterday
Dad can't raise the money
to buy his boat back
They're both sick and broke
So you sold us out?
Tried to
You sold out our lives
ls it that bad?
We're leaving here. Get ready
We're being evicted?
That's right
We didn't pay into
our pension plans
We need to find ourselves
a cheap nursing home
Can't rely on the government now
l'll go see what l can find
Hold onto this.
lf things get really bad,
you take it to the cops
-Just me?
-Goro!
Jun and Tatsu...
You can't reach them?
Darn
Did you grab the cash?
You're the only one who saved up
l can't make it. What did l do!
Take your meds. Let's go
The cops
Should we confess?
lt's just a cover.
So they can walk right in
l'm sorry... l got you involved
Kosuke, look after her
Anybody home?
You already rub out
Tatsuo and Jun?
Speak proper Japanese
Say
Who is Goro, really?
l've never figured him out either
Run!
Hurry
Let's go!
Over there
Goro
What!
This card...
Look after it
Let's go
Kosuke?
No!
Guys...
Kosuke!
Hey!
Kosuke!
Buckle up
Let's go
What's an
''ecological'' dress code...
You kept us waiting 1 hour.
Bet things are crazy around here
lt's the media that's going crazy
R.C.A.
What?
We checked the vehicles visible
on that surveillance video
and found one vehicle,
registered to R.C.A., so they say
R.C.A. Risk Coverage Agency
Covert ops that handle discord
at the center of power
A shadow military, so they say
The boss?
Kijima Ko
What? No ''so they say''?
You can have your picture back
lt's blurry.
lt's probably a look-alike
No smoking
That day, we were at that hotel...
We scoped you out
You squeak by on some
two-bit scams, right?
l'm the only one left.
Just arrest me
Use this to indict that Kijima guy
l want to make sure
nothing happens to her
l want you both to go home
There'll be no record of
your visit to this station
or what you told me
Oh, yeah?
Let's go
The chief only cares
about his career!
lf l get us in over our heads,
his future is over!
What an idiot
Minister, can we have a word?
A word!
Minister Atsugi, please
Do you really know nothing
about R.C.A.?
l know nothing
But the allegations against you
will remain
Japanese bureaucrats
may be cowards,
but when provoked,
turn into monsters. That's all
So, Vice Minister. That's his move
So, l'm a monster?
The sly fox himself,
telling it like it is
lf he's backed against the wall,
his plan is to blame it all on you
He already has
l was supposed to get
30% of his take
And now l'm the cash delivery guy.
Here's your final payment
As usual, l can't write a receipt
You won't mess up
this time, right?
What?
You had witnesses to the scene and
your car recorded by surveillance
Those risk factors
are all covered,
by the extra fees R.C.A. charges
Monster
Cremate all of them
Yes, sir
The young folk all ran off
just when we need them
Don't break your hip
l won't
Next...Hurry up
Forget the trophy
Oh, load the trophy up
''Should auld
acquaintance be forgot''
''And never brought to mind''
''Should auld acquaintance
lose their minds''
''And wind up in a ditch''
Kosuke said, 4, 6, 4, 9
Come on
Please take your card and receipt.
Thank you
Go straight and right at the hill
Thank you
That way
''Harukawa Kenichi,
Yoshiko, Kosuke''
A pen
''From Kosuke''
Kosuke made it back to the sea
Where's the Chameleon star?
You can't see it
in the bright of the day
You've got a point
Actually...
-Not true
-Not true
lt's on the far side of the Earth,
visible from the
Southern Hemisphere
For real?
The Chameleon star's always trying
to catch the Fly star
ln the North, the Fly's
catching the Chameleon
The matches Kosuke gave me
won't light
-Let's...
-l'm Goro
l'm Goro,
and Goro is me
Living like cinders and ash...
and imagining you'll die,
But then the weak flame
glows again
The flame flickers out
and turns to ash again
Let's split up here
l want to thank you...
For sticking around
Oh, yeah?
l get it
ls what l'd like to say,
but can't. How pathetic
Keiko
''Who's behind me...''
Who the heck are you!
What the heck you doin'!
Where the heck
do you think you are!
What the heck are you doin'!
Who are you!
Are you crazy!
Stay back!
Where's your boss?
l was waiting for you
Time for you and your
darling girlfriend to finally die
Amazing...
The boss is...
Witness Kijima
Our firm is no more
than a security company
We had no involvement
Chairman
Abe Teppei
Kijima,
do you really have no
involvement with Minister Atsugi?
lf you're exposed later,
you'll be up for more than perjury
Witness Kijima
No involvement at all
We're sick of that line!
-You're in on it!
-For how much!
Chairman
Abe Teppei
Going back to my earlier question,
you abducted lshibashi
at the hotel, right?
Admit it!
Admit it!
Witness Kijima
Regarding the question
of whether l,
or someone involved
with my company
had contact with or possibly
kidnapped lshibashi
at the Oriental Plaza Hotel,
on the date and time stipulated,
there is not a shred of evidence
lf anything, M.P. Abe,
l am struggling to comprehend
on what basis you imagined
such a wild scenario...
Chairman
Chairman!
Look at this photo
Here's your evidence
He's in the picture!
Kijima's in the picture!
Minister!
You put him up to it!
l've been framed, haven't l?
What the heck would happen
to this country without us
My right arm and l will be
waiting for you outside
What'll we do now?
Go back to slacking...
this story are entirely fictional''
l'm a serious Astrologist.
l don't hold hands to read palms
l'm not here to be harassed.
Go away
l have this little problem
What is it?
Aging
Aging?
The problem with aging...
What star sign are you?
Oh, l'm hardly a star,
l'm from nowhere...
Get lost
l'm worried...
about premature aging
l get wasted on 3 drinks
and buy up lottery tickets...
About your little problem.
Can you still get it up?
You're fine
l'm the one worried...
about aging
l'm starting to sag a little.
Know what l mean?
Getting up in the morning
is a real drag...
Starting to feel my age...
Don't you worry.
You're still really hot
lf you can be such a sweetheart,
why didn't you just seduce me?
Man, you're moody
How to deal with my
many moods...
For your pension plan
Wow, so much?
Hey!
l figured out your sign
You're a Chameleon
''CHAMELEON''
The moment we've
all been waiting for
Here come the bride and the groom
Please give them a warm welcome!
No way. The guy's super hot
Unbelievable
With that old bag?
For her daddy's money
-A gigolo
-Her whole family's tacky
Which is what bring us here
The honorable father of the bride,
Midorikawa Hisanori,
is the fabled inheritor
from Tokyo...
lnvestor
The fabled investor,
and his daughter, Yukie,
while serving for many years
as her father's accomplice...
Accountant
Accountant,
drove her beloved Jaguar,
and traveled the world...
l'm Sakai Kenzo,
Marketing Director,
Yamamura Trading
About the bridegroom,
Harukawa Kosuke
Although losing his parents
and orphaned in this world,
he has matured into
a fine citizen,
distinguishing himself in my...
Now it's time to cut
the wedding cake...
Just a minute.
Come closer, everybody
You in the back, hurry up!
Still ordering us around...
May the happy couple
launch their love...
Not so fast!
Wedding cake, darn!
Turn on the lights!
Harukawa, if you
can afford all this crap,
you can sure pay me back, now!
Hey! Lights on, now!
Please, not here
Just who are you?
l'll tell you
l have the singular honor of
representing the Kikuei Clan
Harukawa here, is a moron,
who borrowed 5 million yen
from our loan shark operation,
without paying back
a yen of interest!
l'll pay you, l will!
Just go home...
Shut up! Hurry up and pay!
Daddy!
Dear...
Harukawa! How stupid can you be,
borrowing money from a gang!
l have no use for
an employee like you!
Noriko, we're going home.
Sakai, fire Harukawa!
Right! Your judgment is correct
Sir, are you really going home?
Madam!
Sir!
Kosuke, you can't let this happen!
Dear guests, please remain calm.
As long as their love is strong...
Who asked you!
You can't even keep your
insults consistent!
Darn!
Please, stop!
Darn you!
-Don't touch her!
-Let go, pay up!
Stop!
Stupid!
That's enough!
Get outside!
Don't worry, everyone
Come out!
Sure, Daddy, l loaned Kosuke money
But that was because l knew
how much he relied on me
His love for me was so pure
he barely held my hand...
You're the one that's too pure!
You're not legally married yet
Who knows how much
they'll blackmail him for
Take all the cash wedding gifts
as your severance pay!
l'm very sorry
My apologies
l detested you from the start!
You're a lowlife that
stinks like rotten fish!
Go away
Now!
-Nice job
-Nice job
Here's our ''severance pay''
Hey, a real stash of cash!
ldiot
Act normal
They're cops
They knew
They're not cops
How can you tell?
Wait!
l was tricked! l was tricked!
That's not true. Please, calm down
Let's go
Oh, hello.
Yes, we're on for tomorrow
Darn you!
What the heck was that about?
They didn't look like yakuza
You're a yakuza, right?
No, you're just a thug
Shut up
From Yamada Miho
10,000 Yen. Cheap guest
Matsunaga...
Can't read it
Nice job
No wrap party?
My idiot Bro's waiting
l want to drink
Sorry, 4 hours left
on the slot machines
Hey, Blackie!
l miss the good old days
What?
''Loyal to None Entertainment''
Morning
Morning
Good morning, everyone
Hey, Goro, did l play it
a little over the top yesterday?
Not at all.
You're always very impressive
Good morning
Your fee for
yesterday's performance
Always appreciated
That's right, we're just happy
to still have roles to play
Thank you for yesterday, sir
Nice job. Thanks
Noriko san, here's yours
Thanks
The breakdown on yesterday's take,
was 4 million yen in cash gifts,
and 1 .5 million for the honeymoon
and apartment rental
Which means each of us
get 780,000 yen
Kosuke, you're saving up, right?
Keep more for yourself,
you're the lead
No, l get my fair share
Now, about the next job
Which one?
Today, l'm meeting the mark
for that wedding, next month
The next troupe performance,
will be at the Toyu Supermarket,
starting at 1 1AM. Sorry it's early
The Tenku Theater Troupe?
We're still negotiating
a guest appearance for you
Sorry you have to handle
our performances
Hey, consider me your manager
Our manager...
Manager
Hey, manager
''Yamamura Theater Troupe''
Grandpa Shu,
Grandma Nori,
Grandpa Ken
Want to take my meds?
You haven't taken any in a while
Actually, mine ran out, too
lf you're that worried about
throat cancer,
quit smoking
Leave me alone
Goro
l'm in bad shape
Go get some medication
That woman we're meeting
with today
That woman? You mean, the mark
l'm in love with her
Let me be clear
You mean, personally?
l'm serious, l'm in love with her
Leave all this behind?
l thought you were saving money
to follow in your dad's footsteps
Whatever. What about money?
Neither of us can make it
in the real world anymore
Anymore!
Welcome
Sorry l'm late.
l couldn't get away
That's fine...Let me introduce...
Hello, l'm Noda Goro
l'll be master of ceremonies at
your wedding. Congratulations
l'm telling you the truth today
l'm...
Actually, l suffer from depression
l came here from a small
fishing village and found a job
But l really struggled
He and l met, waiting in one of...
those long lines
at a psychiatric clinic
You could say we're the
Depressed Dudes
Just like today,
l always depend on Goro,
because l can turn into...
a different person
at a moment's notice
Um...
No, please hear him out
Honestly...Honestly...
l want to start over with you
Take you with me and go back
to the sea
Listen, l didn't know
how to tell you, either
l kept trying to tell you
but never could
l was never serious about us
You seemed so serious and quiet,
l felt so bad for you
lf we go any farther,
l'll break your heart
Sorry.
l know you paid for the dates
Find someone terrific. Bye!
Hey wait! You conned him!
''Kinouchi Psychiatric Clinic''
Thank you
You should wait 'til after you eat
What's up, Jun?
Listen to me! l saw it on TV...
Gosh! You couldn't even
collect today
100,000 yen only? ldiot!
And you want to join us?
l'm sorry!
Yesterday's basement garage!
Who you talking to!
That guy!
That guy!
Kosuke
Kosuke
Let's go home
Tatsuo
Let's go out
Tatsuo!
Hey, what?
We're going to go ahead and eat
Sure, go ahead
l'm sure hungry
We start with a report on
testimony at
a Parliamentary Hearing
Witness Atsugi
l stand here before you today,
not to respond to any allegations,
but in order to establish whether
or not these allegations
carry any truth at all
Getting to the point,
l have absolutely
no knowledge of this matter
Transportation Minister Atsugi was
scheduled to testify in Parliament
regarding allegations of bribery
Due to the
extraordinary disappearance...
of another key witness,
lshibashi Tomoyasu,
the Hearing was postponed
lshibashi, the planning director
for Japan Real Estate Corp,
has simply disappeared...
lt's him, right!
l couldn't believe it!
The Police have determined that
lshibashi is in some troubles
and have been investigating
his activities from yesterday...
They say the Minister's secretary
killed himself,
but they killed him
They killed that guy, too?
We're witnesses, right?
Think there's money in a tip-off?
Money?
Money...
Think we could get
1 million yen for a tip-off?
lf we do, they'll wipe us out
Then it's the cops
Like we can just go report
to the cops
Then it's off?
Forget it!
l'll be back, in due course
What's ''in due course'' mean?
Hey, watch it
''lf you're going to dance...''
''Dance the tap, tap,
wiretap dance''
''lf l don't make it back,
use this''
''Goro''
He knows
He's no dummy
Take me to your boss.
l want to talk to him
Yes, so,
you'll be in touch with the local
risk assessment section,
and we'll hire
an anti-terrorism specialist...
So l hear you're vegetarian
When Noda Goro was 10,
his parents lost their
interior decorating business
and walked out on
50 million yen in debt
and killed themselves
Goro was placed in what they
used to call an orphanage
When he was 1 4,
he slashed a contractor who
owed his parents with a knife,
landing him in reform school
That's where he met Ookita Tatsuo
and Yoshida Jun
After reform school,
he joined martial arts school,
got kicked out, hired by yakuza,
got kicked out, wound up
in Chinatown in L.A.,
as a bodyguard for the
Asian mafia, but after a year...
Let's not go that route
Paper-scissors-rock!
You got back to Japan...
3 years ago?
Yeah, well
You were 25
Since then?
l'd had a pretty active life,
so l became a regular slacker
A slacker,
who's depressed
and cons weddings
Which is why l've got
no credibility whatsoever
Even if l told them
l saw you there,
they'd ask me what l was doing
l'll shut up my 3 guys
No matter what,
l won't let them talk
So can't you leave us alone?
What do you mean,
''No matter what?''
You drugged or tortured
that witness, right?
He'll be dumped somewhere
tomorrow. Total amnesia
He'll never testify in Parliament
Where did you fight?
What?
Ex-fighters rub
their hands like that
To keep their heart
and lungs in shape
So, you were a fighter?
l only trained
You breathe even a word,
and you do know what
the punishment will be
To the marrow of my bones.
There's no way out
lt's not much, but take it
You've spared us the trouble
of executing you...
Not that we would
Who do you think l am?
Don't look down on me...
ls what l'd like to say,
but can't. How pathetic
Could l take 4 or 5 bills
for carfare?
''Who's behind me...''
l'm a serious Astrologist
l don't hold...
You're the chameleon...
How's your aging problem been?
Yourself?
Doesn't matter. You paid me
but l never told your fortune
Your birth date?
l think it was September 22...
More or less
More or less?
Won't work?
lt's fine, you're a Virgo. Hold on
Listen, if you have to
look it up in some books...
Look how thick this book is
lf l had the brains to memorize
this, l'd be in another business
Unbelievable
Shall l call an ambulance?
l'm fine.
l haven't eaten in a while
You're my first customer in 5 days
lt's hard to read
Want to go eat?
Don't order anymore eggs, please
That's your 7th or 8th egg
And stop mixing mustard
into your drink
lt's totally addictive
Can l ask your name?
What? My name?
Goro
Goro?
Rhymes with Gogo girl
Mine's Koike Keiko.
My name's all K's
l don't mean you,
but l have lousy luck with men
The guy l considered marrying
was a marriage con man
My parents said l was the fool
and cut me off
So now l'm broke
l decided to join the cons
That's why l tell fake fortunes
Keep the change
Thanks
Use this to go home
Hey! Don't insult me
ls what l'd like to say,
but can't. How pathetic
Hey!
Don't worry about me.
All of Tokyo's my pad
l can always crash
a massage parlor
Are you...
ls there...
a reason you don't
want to sleep with me?
The man taken into custody
on this bridge early this morning,
has been identified
as lshibashi Tomoyasu,
the missing Japan Real Estate
Corporation executive
Mr. lshibashi appears physically
unharmed and healthy,
but suffers from amnesia,
and is unresponsive to questions
from the police and his family
As a result,
the recently postponed...
l'm with the news desk.
Can l help?
Parliamentary Hearings will be
delayed further
Unbelievable
lt's good. Let's go with it!
Where was this?
The Oriental Plaza Hotel basement
When?
The afternoon before the Hearing.
You'll pay me right away, right?
l asked you to wait on that
10 million.
lf not, l'll take 1 million
l'll talk to my boss,
but you agree to
go on the show, right?
We'll conceal your face
and alter your voice
We'll shoot him in there
With the monitors behind him
The chair goes...
Goro, zip up your fly
lt hurts!
Hang in there, Granny
No, call the hospital
Hey, what's up!
This looks bad
Your son's car hit her at that
crosswalk with no streetlights
l asked a friend in the...
Department of Transportation,
who found out it's your son's car
He could be charged
with hit-and-run
Shall l call the police?
The timing's all wrong
What's going on?
According to Kosuke,
we don't have any marks
lined up for wedding fraud
Jun had a great idea
Just the sort of idea from
a yakuza in training
l'm not really into it.
lt's a one-note drama
l considered the ''fake-son'' con,
but it's not exactly our style
We put the mark on
some new millionaire,
and when his kid drives out
in some fancy car, bingo!
We offer a friendly settlement,
for at least 1 million
Who's she?
l heard you have a spare room
on the 2nd floor, practically free
She cons people, too
That's a little harsh
But your little scheme won't work
-Why not?
-Listen, with wedding fraud,
the marks have no idea
they've been tricked
With your scheme they'll know
they've been tricked
when the son comes
Oh, guess you're right
No, please hold on
This new millionaire with
the kid and the fancy car
Say, l stuff a pillow up
my dress and...
''lt's true!''
''He is your son, right?''
''He's definitely
my baby's father!''
''How can you be so cold?''
That's the pitch
All of you, Granny, Grandpa, too,
start crying
All my brothers are furious
and then it's your turn
You're training to be
a yakuza, right?
Yo, my older sister here...
Younger sister
Younger...
You think you can
get off knockin' up
my younger sister without paying?
This way, even when the son
comes home
after the panicked parents
have paid money,
they won't figure it out because
the son plays with lots of girls
And they won't go to the cops
Sounds like a really meaty role
Sounds like we got ourselves
a new young actress
A genius!
Being called a genius
is a little...
You had a hard time, didn't you?
Have you prayed for the baby?
l've been praying for mine,
all these 50 years
Grandma Nori, are you nuts?
lt's just a story she made up
lt's all right
Women use tears
to flush their pain
Then you'll be ready for new pain
OK?
What's all this about?
l want to party hard tonight
lt's time we all got
drunk together
What! For real!
lt's true!
For real!
l'll die, l'll die on you!
That's how they crashed
into our car
That's back when they were
seriously depressed
Kosuke and Goro were
And that's how we all
started living together here
ldiots!
l'm depressed!
Depressed! Depressed!
Enough to shoot you!
So, Kosuke's going back to the sea
to become a fisherman
lt'll fix his depression
lt's fixable!
A man of the sea!
Who? Who goes there?
Shut up
Who? Who goes there?
''As requested, l presumptuously
announce myself''
''l hail from the village
of Kunisada...''
Boss!
Hey Asa!
Should l die in obscurity here,
Kunisada Chuji's name
would be dishonored
''lf you're going to dance
the dance,''
''dance to the Song of Tokyo''
''ln the glorious capital''
''ln the middle of
the glorious capital...''
See ya
See ya
See ya
Hey, Jun, this way
Hey, Blackie
Kosuke
''Witness Saw lshibashi Kidnapped''
''Midtown Hotel
Afternoon before Hearing''
Hey, kitty, hey
''Witness to Kidnapping
in Hotel Basement Lot''
''Mystery Man
Delivers Evidence to TV Station''
''A man delivered
recorded evidence to NMN TV,''
''shortly before lshibashi...''
lt's me. l'm the one that did that
From that drawer
l didn't give it to them.
l ran away
Kosuke...
Money... l needed a lot
of money right away
What's the rush?
l got a call from Mom yesterday
Dad can't raise the money
to buy his boat back
They're both sick and broke
So you sold us out?
Tried to
You sold out our lives
ls it that bad?
We're leaving here. Get ready
We're being evicted?
That's right
We didn't pay into
our pension plans
We need to find ourselves
a cheap nursing home
Can't rely on the government now
l'll go see what l can find
Hold onto this.
lf things get really bad,
you take it to the cops
-Just me?
-Goro!
Jun and Tatsu...
You can't reach them?
Darn
Did you grab the cash?
You're the only one who saved up
l can't make it. What did l do!
Take your meds. Let's go
The cops
Should we confess?
lt's just a cover.
So they can walk right in
l'm sorry... l got you involved
Kosuke, look after her
Anybody home?
You already rub out
Tatsuo and Jun?
Speak proper Japanese
Say
Who is Goro, really?
l've never figured him out either
Run!
Hurry
Let's go!
Over there
Goro
What!
This card...
Look after it
Let's go
Kosuke?
No!
Guys...
Kosuke!
Hey!
Kosuke!
Buckle up
Let's go
What's an
''ecological'' dress code...
You kept us waiting 1 hour.
Bet things are crazy around here
lt's the media that's going crazy
R.C.A.
What?
We checked the vehicles visible
on that surveillance video
and found one vehicle,
registered to R.C.A., so they say
R.C.A. Risk Coverage Agency
Covert ops that handle discord
at the center of power
A shadow military, so they say
The boss?
Kijima Ko
What? No ''so they say''?
You can have your picture back
lt's blurry.
lt's probably a look-alike
No smoking
That day, we were at that hotel...
We scoped you out
You squeak by on some
two-bit scams, right?
l'm the only one left.
Just arrest me
Use this to indict that Kijima guy
l want to make sure
nothing happens to her
l want you both to go home
There'll be no record of
your visit to this station
or what you told me
Oh, yeah?
Let's go
The chief only cares
about his career!
lf l get us in over our heads,
his future is over!
What an idiot
Minister, can we have a word?
A word!
Minister Atsugi, please
Do you really know nothing
about R.C.A.?
l know nothing
But the allegations against you
will remain
Japanese bureaucrats
may be cowards,
but when provoked,
turn into monsters. That's all
So, Vice Minister. That's his move
So, l'm a monster?
The sly fox himself,
telling it like it is
lf he's backed against the wall,
his plan is to blame it all on you
He already has
l was supposed to get
30% of his take
And now l'm the cash delivery guy.
Here's your final payment
As usual, l can't write a receipt
You won't mess up
this time, right?
What?
You had witnesses to the scene and
your car recorded by surveillance
Those risk factors
are all covered,
by the extra fees R.C.A. charges
Monster
Cremate all of them
Yes, sir
The young folk all ran off
just when we need them
Don't break your hip
l won't
Next...Hurry up
Forget the trophy
Oh, load the trophy up
''Should auld
acquaintance be forgot''
''And never brought to mind''
''Should auld acquaintance
lose their minds''
''And wind up in a ditch''
Kosuke said, 4, 6, 4, 9
Come on
Please take your card and receipt.
Thank you
Go straight and right at the hill
Thank you
That way
''Harukawa Kenichi,
Yoshiko, Kosuke''
A pen
''From Kosuke''
Kosuke made it back to the sea
Where's the Chameleon star?
You can't see it
in the bright of the day
You've got a point
Actually...
-Not true
-Not true
lt's on the far side of the Earth,
visible from the
Southern Hemisphere
For real?
The Chameleon star's always trying
to catch the Fly star
ln the North, the Fly's
catching the Chameleon
The matches Kosuke gave me
won't light
-Let's...
-l'm Goro
l'm Goro,
and Goro is me
Living like cinders and ash...
and imagining you'll die,
But then the weak flame
glows again
The flame flickers out
and turns to ash again
Let's split up here
l want to thank you...
For sticking around
Oh, yeah?
l get it
ls what l'd like to say,
but can't. How pathetic
Keiko
''Who's behind me...''
Who the heck are you!
What the heck you doin'!
Where the heck
do you think you are!
What the heck are you doin'!
Who are you!
Are you crazy!
Stay back!
Where's your boss?
l was waiting for you
Time for you and your
darling girlfriend to finally die
Amazing...
The boss is...
Witness Kijima
Our firm is no more
than a security company
We had no involvement
Chairman
Abe Teppei
Kijima,
do you really have no
involvement with Minister Atsugi?
lf you're exposed later,
you'll be up for more than perjury
Witness Kijima
No involvement at all
We're sick of that line!
-You're in on it!
-For how much!
Chairman
Abe Teppei
Going back to my earlier question,
you abducted lshibashi
at the hotel, right?
Admit it!
Admit it!
Witness Kijima
Regarding the question
of whether l,
or someone involved
with my company
had contact with or possibly
kidnapped lshibashi
at the Oriental Plaza Hotel,
on the date and time stipulated,
there is not a shred of evidence
lf anything, M.P. Abe,
l am struggling to comprehend
on what basis you imagined
such a wild scenario...
Chairman
Chairman!
Look at this photo
Here's your evidence
He's in the picture!
Kijima's in the picture!
Minister!
You put him up to it!
l've been framed, haven't l?
What the heck would happen
to this country without us
My right arm and l will be
waiting for you outside
What'll we do now?
Go back to slacking...