Cease Fire (1985) - full transcript
Tim Murphy is a Vietnam Vet. When he loses his job he starts to relive all the pain and horror of his time in Vietnam. The stresses and strains nearly destroy his marriage and his family. Only after joining a veterans' therapy group does Tim find relief from his nightmares. With the support of his fellow vets and the love of his wife, Tim recovers.
(dramatic music)
(intense music)
(heavy breathing)
- How long have you been unemployed?
Have you been actively looking
for employment this past month?
Have you been offered employment?
Next.
You have to finish filling out the back.
There's a counter over there.
- Uh, do you have a pen I could use?
- There's pens on the counter.
- Well do I have to
wait in that line again?
- Look, just finish filling out the form
then you can bring it
right back to me, okay?
- Hey man.
- Thanks.
- We have schedules, we
have schedules to keep,
you can't be coming every
time you're scheduled.
- I'm asking, I'm asking.
- Excuse me, excuse me a second.
Excuse me.
Uh the lady that was here before,
she said I could bring
this right back up to her.
- You're going to have to wait
in line like everyone else.
- No, you see I already waited in line.
- What makes you so special?
- There she is.
Excuse me, Senorita, could you?
- Look, I'm not going to do
anything about your application
until you get back to the end of the line.
- Look, I already waited in line once.
- Well I got a hair appointment.
- I got a job interview and I.
- Sir.
I'm sorry, you're gonna have to
step to the back of the line.
- Just take this and shove it up your ass.
- Stole my pen.
- Don't give me the sorry bit,
don't give me the sorry bit.
Pick up your orders,
get 'em out to the
customers before they leave.
- Boy he's in a good mood today.
- Will you just move it?
Move it.
- Ah he's a pussy cat.
Cute.
The old spoon trick huh?
- Oh it ain't too far for
you to reach, is it mama?
I left ya a tip.
- Well thank you.
- I didn't have to.
It's just ah, just a way of, you know,
trying to tell ya something, you know.
- Like you're sorry?
- Well kinda.
I am okay, sorry.
- Okay you're forgiven.
- Okay, bye.
- Bye.
Ronnie open your mouth.
Open your mouth!
Ronnie please take the medicine.
Come on it's good for you,
it'll make you feel better.
Ronnie open your mouth, open it.
Open your mouth.
- It's good for you Ronnie,
it tastes like candy.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Where's the rubber bands?
- In the junk drawer.
- Big junk drawer or little junk drawer?
- Little junk drawer.
How was that?
- Yuck!
- Ha ha, tricked you.
- I think it's time for bed.
(growling)
- Bed time!
- [Ronnie] Do we have to?
- [Tim] Yes you have to.
- Yes.
- Goodnight Mom.
Goodnight Mom.
- Goodnight.
- Goodnight Mom.
(yelping)
Will they catch him?
- [Ronnie] I'm gonna get you,
you'll forget by tomorrow.
- Nobody's gonna get
anybody, you're going to bed.
Ellen take your barrettes out.
That's probably not too
good on your tummy, is it?
Night night.
Hop up.
In you go.
- Goodnight Daddy.
- Goodnight sweetheart.
We're going to sleep now right?
No parties, no games.
On three you're asleep.
One, two, three, sleep.
You're not asleep.
Goodnight, I love you.
- I love you too.
Hey!
- Oh yeah I forgot.
You know there's nothing to be afraid of.
- I know.
- Gum.
Ugh.
(giggling)
Goodnight.
- Goodnight.
- Goodnight.
Oh I forgot, I have a headache.
(laughing)
- Okay, fine.
What the?
- What's that?
My goodness there's a tennis
shoe under your pillow.
- Yeah with two tickets on it.
Nassau.
Are these for us?
- No, no, I bought them
for Bill and Beverly.
- Oh my god.
We can't afford this.
Can we afford this?
- No, but we're going anyway.
(lip smacking)
My headache just went away.
- [Paula] Oh good.
(moaning)
(mellow country music)
- Things are definitely looking up.
Hi Patty.
All teased up.
- Mm hmm.
- Um let me have a nice uh tall cool one.
Hey how ya doing?
Boy that was some bullshit down there.
- I'm sorry, I don't know what you mean.
- I was there the other day,
down at the Unemployment Office.
The other day.
The other day when you went
down to sign up for unemployment.
- Oh yeah, you were in the other line.
- Yeah, right, that's when
you noticed my jacket.
- Yeah I did, didn't I.
I think I owe you a pen.
- Ah that's no problem, you can keep it.
So, how long were you in country?
- What makes you think I was?
- You got a familiar look.
Can I buy you a beer?
Don't let the earring fool yah, sailor.
- Yeah, sure.
(laughing)
We laughed 'til we
thought we were gonna die.
Oh man.
- Oh.
Boy that is Army, that is Army.
(laughing)
Here's more Army for ya.
It's Easter time and I'm
still real green, right.
We're expecting our hot
meal in for the day.
So these guys run down to
the slick when it comes in
and there's incoming all over.
They drop the meal onto
some other crate there
and they give us a box of
Halloween costumes and decorations.
You think these guys tossed them away?
They were out there on the LZ with bunting
and throwing streamers
around like a parade.
And there's Jimmy Hendrix
blasting all over the place.
I kept wondering.
My problem was I was
wondering what the VC was
gonna think about us, like
we went nuts or something.
Oh god I just couldn't
help but dream about home,
that's all I could think about.
I kept thinking okay, somebody
just yell out timeout,
start this dream over.
And I'd be in it.
Home.
- Yeah.
There wasn't anything to
think about but to go home.
- Hey Badman, what you
gonna do when get home baby?
- Man he's coming with me to Miami.
- Shit yeah man.
Me and Tim here, we're gonna
buy ourselves a fuckin' boat
and open ourselves up a
charter fishing service, man.
Permanent R&R in the sun.
- Right on.
- What the fuck do you know about boats?
You're from Pennsylvania.
- Man you don't have to
know nothing about boats.
You just gotta lay back
between the controls
and rake in all that money from all them
fat cat Yankees that come on down.
(cheering)
- Yes!
- Shit man, I don't envy the
Coast Guard or nothing man.
They're gonna be busy as hell
saving your balls everyday.
- Check this out.
- One foxy lady man.
- I tell you though, her
little sister's the one.
Paula.
- She's got a sister?
- Yeah right there.
There she is, that's the one.
She writes to me more than Renee does.
She's uh, Paula Murphy.
(loud explosion)
- God damn, fucking generator again.
- Shit.
- When it rains like this,
it reminds me of a spring day back home.
- Home.
(yelling)
I can't wait!
- Man, you know what I'm gonna do
when I get back to the world?
- Say what?
- I'm gonna go and I'm
gonna buy me a VW man.
Then I'm gonna pick up my girl,
man we're gonna go travel
around the whole country.
You know maybe someday
I'll come visit you guys.
- Hey.
- Hear that Rafer man,
god damn reeking in a bug.
- Fuck you Badman.
- A fucking reeker!
Right on.
(laughing)
- Damn man, why don't you
guys just cut it out man.
Fuck all of you guys man.
- What happened man?
I thought you'd be halfway
to California by now.
- Plane got hit coming in this morning.
Four of them bought the farm.
Which ends all the flights out today.
- Hey Hart, you ever
gonna leave this country?
Or are you planning on being
buried in this shit hole?
- Bullshit man.
(upbeat rock music)
♫ Could you please take me there someday
♫ Alone I'll just get lost
- Honey.
Hun?
- Hmm?
- We got our third notice.
- What third notice?
- The TV people.
- What about it?
- Well you said you were
gonna take care of it.
Are you?
- There, it's taken care of.
- Hey, I was watching that.
- No you weren't, you
were playing that game.
Here, send that with the next payment.
Ellen go see about Ronnie.
Well what was that stunt all about?
- I'm tired of hearing
about that goddamn TV.
I'm tired of people fuckin' with me.
- Oh don't give me that.
I know there's something
else bothering you
and I wanna know what it is.
- Don't start with me Paula.
Don't start with me.
- I'm not, I don't wanna fight,
I just wanna know what's going on.
(somber music)
(loud explosion)
(screaming)
- Hey, hey man, stay
down here and get down.
Stay down.
What's the matter with you?
- Oh Christ.
- You okay?
- Yeah sure, sure I'm okay.
Sure.
- Man, you promise you won't
laugh if I tell you something?
- What is it?
- I'm scared.
I'm scared shitless.
- Oh yeah.
Well if you want to man
you can hold my hand.
(loud explosion)
- It's okay man, it's okay.
Everything's gonna be alright.
(upbeat music)
(groaning)
So this is your art?
- This is definitely early Lukeian.
- That's some weird shit man.
- It is weird shit.
- Whoa, look at this.
Silver Star, a Bronze Star,
two Bronze Stars with valor.
Purple Heart, and an Air Medal.
Got a real fuckin' hero.
- Up yours too.
It doesn't buy a cup of coffee.
- Yeah no shit.
Nice frame though.
- You still got yours?
- Oh no.
I must've lost 'em or something.
- Well my wife she just wanted me
to keep 'em for the kid, so.
Then she put 'em in this
thing, she kind made it, yanno.
I've even got some of my pictures still.
Catch.
- [Tim] Vet center?
- Yeah well, they uh
kinda helped at one time.
- What for?
- Helped me find a job
once, then uh I went down
to help out with some of
the guys who were a mess.
They just had to talk, you know,
so they just liked to
talk, rap, they gotta rap.
- Having all this shit
around, doesn't it make ya?
Damn, I just wanna forget about it.
Viet fucking Nam, what a fucking jerk off.
- Yeah well that's pretty specific.
I'll drink to that.
- [Woman] We are happy to
present our child to be baptized.
- You have asked to have
your child baptized.
In doing so, you are
accepting the responsibility
of training him in the
progress of the faith.
It will be your duty to
bring him up to keep God's
commandments as Christ does by
loving God and our neighbor.
Do you clearly understand
what you are undertaking?
- We do.
- [Priest] Are you ready to
help the progress of the child
in the duty of Christian of parents.
- We are.
(baby crying)
- We do.
We do.
(baby crying)
(ominous music)
(loud explosion)
- [Priest] Parents and Godparents,
this light is entrusted to you
to be kept burning brightly.
This child of yours has
been enlightened by Christ.
- What happened?
- I dunno, uh.
I dunno it just got on my nerves.
It was so hot in there, you know?
- It wasn't that hot.
Hey is something wrong?
- Yes, something is wrong.
- Okay.
- I just don't feel good, okay?
- Fine.
Sorry.
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Look it's just, I dunno
it just got on my nerves.
The baby was crying and.
I guess I kinda messed things up, huh?
- No, no you didn't.
Honey it was just a baby crying, you know?
You've heard babies cry before.
- I know.
- I just want you to be honest with me.
- I'm alright.
I just haven't been feeling very good.
Maybe I'm catching Ronnie's bug.
- Look at how green that field is.
It reminds me of Nam.
Boy all they had was rocks,
no grass, when I played on it.
You know what my first
impression of Nam was?
It was that I'd never
seen anything so green.
I couldn't figure out how could anything
with so much life hold so much death.
- You played ball?
- Yeah, sure.
Come on man we better get some work
or we can both go on welfare together.
- That's not funny man.
- I know it's not, but
you gotta lighten up.
- I can't afford to lighten up.
- Okay.
Give me 50 cents, I'll go make some calls.
- Here, Paula gave me a
dollar, you can have half.
- All I want is half.
Oh, give me the number
down by the airport.
- Paula?
Hi.
- Hey.
- How are you doing?
- Oh fine.
- You got time to get a bite or something?
- Sure, why not.
- Well you know, it's probably temporary.
I mean I'm sure as soon as
he gets a job he'll be fine,
he'll snap right out of it.
- God I hope you're right.
Listen I gotta tell you something, okay?
See it's not just this time, I mean,
something else happened too.
- What?
- See I remember when
we first started dating,
we'd be like laying out at the park,
you know making out and all that.
Any little noise, I mean
anything, he would jump.
And then right after we got married,
he would wake up in the middle
of the night in like a sweat.
You know?
- Did he say anything?
- Well he said it was just nightmares.
Anyway everything just
stopped after awhile.
The kids came and everything.
He never said anything about it.
I dunno, I didn't wanna push it.
Maybe that was a mistake
on my part, I don't know.
- Hey, listen it's gonna be okay huh?
It'll be fine.
- I'm sorry.
- [Wendy] It's okay.
- Thanks.
- [Wendy] Yeah.
- There's my boy.
Hey Ronnie, come here, I
want you to meet somebody.
Hey, Ronnie.
- No let him be man, he's just scared.
Stranger and all that, let him be.
- Yeah sure.
Kids.
Come on, dinner must be almost ready.
- Thanks.
- You haven't tasted the food yet man.
- Hey, do you snore at night?
- No.
- How do you know?
If you're asleep, how can you tell?
- My ears are open.
- Ah, but how do you know?
- [Ronnie] 'Cause my ears are open.
- Okay I'll buy that.
Okay I'm gonna give you
another piece of gum
if you pop your muscles and
show 'em to me one time.
Let me see.
OH, oh, we are in trouble.
But you won, I'll give you the gum.
Here's one for you.
And one for you.
- He must miss his kid.
- Are you in the Scouts yet?
- No, he's too young.
- Oh really, what are you the big girl?
Huh?
Gonna hide from me?
I'll rub my whiskers on you.
What are you looking at?
I'll get you too huh.
- Get him.
- Hey, hey, hey, that's enough.
- Well you've done it now Luke.
- Come on, come on.
- [Ellen] Can't Luke tuck us in?
- No, Luke can't tuck you in.
- [Ellen] Why?
- I don't mind, I don't mind.
- You sure?
- Sure.
- Okay, they're yours.
- Okay.
- Come on kids.
Are these gonna go away some day?
- No, they won't go away.
They'll always be there.
- I love you.
- I love you.
(intense music)
(heavy breathing)
(somber music)
(intense music)
(suspenseful music)
(distant rattling)
- Look I don't even know if
I'm in the right place, so.
- Well maybe it isn't and maybe it is,
but let's talk about it anyway.
What made you think about coming here?
- Well, I um, I found
this in my husband's coat.
- Can you be a little more
specific about your husband?
Do you think that he is going through
changes now that are related to Nam?
- Well I wouldn't be here if
I didn't think that would I?
I told ya I found that in his pocket.
And the other morning when I
was taking out the garbage,
I found his medals and uh,
he was throwing them away.
- That's uh, not unusual.
A lot of the Vets will try to throw away
anything that reminds them of Nam.
What's his name?
- I'm not gonna tell you his name.
I don't want you calling him
up, telling him I came here.
- Do you think that he would be
willing to come down to a meeting?
- No.
- Would you be willing to come down
to a meeting of the wives?
It'll help you to understand
your husband a lot better
if you can sit down and have
communication with women
who have had a very,
very similar experience.
Yeah?
- If it'll help my
husband, I'll do anything.
- Looks good.
I think we can use you.
- Man it's good to hear those words again.
- Yeah I bet things have
been hard out there.
- You ain't a kidding.
- Yeah how about uh, can
you start next Monday?
- Man I can start today,
I got no problems at all.
- Fine, fine, how about a cup of coffee.
- Uh no, no thanks.
- Well you know I noticed
on your application
that you were in Vietnam.
- Yes sir I was.
- Was in the Core myself.
Yeah now that was a real war.
- I'm sure it was.
- Yeah.
I landed on Iwo Jima.
Second wave in.
You know I went to basic training
for 10 weeks with a kid called Eli Kyle.
He was the first one to get it,
as soon as the doors opened
on that landing craft.
Do you know what the
tragedy is about Vietnam?
Nobody really knew why
the hell we were there.
- Yes well uh, I guess.
- You know I got a kid,
just about your age.
You know how he got outta that war?
Smart kid.
He went out and found a
doctor, had him write a letter
saying he had a bad back
and that's how he got out.
First of course, you
know, I was really pissed.
I mean when you get called to
serve your country, you go,
just like I did.
Sorry to have to say it
but, the old US government,
Johnson, Nixon, you know they
really had you pulled in,
they really sucked you in.
Nobody honestly wanted to go to Vietnam.
There was nothing there.
It was nothing but a suckers
war, that's all it was.
(intense music)
(loud smashing)
- Ted!
Ted what's going on?
What the hell did you do?
Okay game time, you wanna take it out,
you wanna take this place out?
- No.
No.
No, come on man.
Come on.
- Oh you, you're lucky.
(screaming)
Hey see this man.
- What?
- This man is the very
site of my greatest moment.
We were up 20 to 16 with about
a minute left to play in the game.
Century, they were driving,
they had the ball right on the 12.
Oh man I gotta show you this.
I gotta show you this.
- [Ted] What?
- [Luke] Alright, you're
that guy from Century.
- [Ted] No I don't wanna be that.
- [Luke] Yeah you gotta
be the guy from Century,
he's just a candy ass.
- [Ted] I don't wanna be.
- [Luke] His name is Weber.
And he's got a big winning smile.
The biggest hotdog you ever saw.
Okay, alright.
Now you stand there.
Okay.
I'm playing safety and
they send their guy out.
That's you.
- Me?
- Get over there.
Okay, now I'm in the
middle, I'm in the middle,
I look over, I look over,
and you've just faked out
a man that's covering you.
- I just faked you out man.
- And I haul ass after ya,
quarterback releases the ball,
and Weber's with his arms out waiting.
Lift your arms and smile, smile you fuck!
(screaming)
And I grab the ball and it
popped free, I got the sucker,
and I waltz 102 yards for a touchdown.
And the crowd, they went nuts.
- You made me spill my beer, you fuck.
- Fuck your beer.
I just told you the
greatest moment of my life.
And I lied about the touchdown.
17 years it's been.
So long ago it was.
And I haven't had anything like it since.
Dammit.
It was supposed to be like this, you know?
It was supposed to be different.
It was supposed to be better.
I mean I didn't expect
much, I didn't expect.
I mean, no horseshit parade.
Besides when I got back from Nam
my fuckin' feet were killin' me.
I expected to live, I just
expected to live my life.
I have the love of my wife and son.
But somebody, some
asshole changed the rules
to the game in the middle
of the fuckin' play.
Nobody dropped the flag.
I wanna tell ya man,
sometimes I think that the guys
we lost over there have it better off.
- Surviving, coming back,
that's the real hell.
- Well they came through
the wire one night,
I don't know how many.
Boy we fired and fired.
There was just this big
wall of people coming at us.
And they overran our position.
(somber music)
I don't know what happened after that.
I still have dreams.
They said that we were overrun
and that we fought hand
to hand for four hours.
I don't know if that's true or not.
And the next day they found me alive.
I was the only one there
and I was still hugging this sapper.
I mean I was still hugging him
and I just like held him,
kept jamming my knife into him.
Every now and then I wake up
in the middle of the night
and I see his face, his eyes are open,
and he's begging me.
(crying)
- Come on Luke, let's go home.
Let's go home.
- Home.
- I'm home.
Hey, I said I was home.
- You're late.
- Well I'm hungry.
- Well then you should've come
home when it was dinner time.
- Honey don't give me any shit,
just make me something to eat, alright?
- Stop it.
- Well what the hell is wrong with you?
- Oh there's nothing wrong with me.
- Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.
What the hell is wrong with you?
- Would you just leave me alone?
Just go fall asleep somewhere.
Take your drunken stupor somewhere else.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, listen, lady,
I don't have to take any shit from you.
- Let go of me.
- Would you just tell
me what's wrong then?
- Nothing is wrong.
Tim is this gonna be the new thing now,
you coming home drunk every night?
- Oh Jesus, I don't need
this shit, I don't need it.
- [Paula] Well neither do I.
- Well then let's just forget
it alright, just forget it!
- No I'm not gonna forget it.
I wanna know what the hell you think
you were doing the other night.
- What night?
- The night your son saw his father
crawling around the
living room with a knife!
That night!
Dammit what is wrong with you?
- I don't know what you're talking about.
- You know damn well
what I'm talking about.
- [Tim] I don't know what
you're talking about.
- You're gonna answer me.
You are!
- I don't wanna talk about it.
- You had your son scared half to death.
- I don't wanna, let go.
- You gotta talk about it.
- I don't want, dammit let go of me.
(loud thudding)
(screaming)
Paula.
- Don't touch me.
- Paula.
I'm sorry.
- Get away from me.
- Oh no, my god.
Paula.
- [Paula] Get away from me!
- [Tim] Paula.
- Go away.
(crying)
Ronnie, come on Ronnie.
Ronnie.
Ronnie, come on.
(calm country music)
Well?
(somber music)
I still have some dinner
left if you're hungry.
I haven't put it up yet.
Tim I was worried about you.
I even called around
looking for you, you know.
I'm just glad you came home.
- I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
- I know.
- I've been thinking about things,
I've been thinking a lot about it.
At first I, I thought I could say it was,
you know an accident, I was drunk.
But it was no accident.
I'm sorry for hurting you.
- [Paula] Oh I love you.
I love you so much.
- I'm thinking and going over and over
and I don't know how or what it is.
Something so deep, so deep inside of me.
Sometimes I just pray to
God that he would just.
Oh Paula I need help.
- Hi I'm Larry uh I was in Vietnam 67,68,
uh I was with the First Air Cav.
- Uh Bill West, Third Marine
Division, force recon.
I was stationed at Pleiku, 70, 71.
That's about it.
- Charles P. Harris.
- [Rob] You ever find out
what the P stands for?
- Not exactly.
Anyway, stationed in Cam
Ranh Bay, truck driving
all the way to Saigon, Phan
Thiet, partial the way.
And that was in 70 to 71 but it was
a trying time in my life, you know.
- Name's Eric, Third Marines.
68, February, when uh, when
the good times used to roll.
- Uh Tim Murphy, First
Cav, High Core, 70, 71.
Did our part in uh An Khe.
- Sergeant Gerald Stanley,
you can call me Gerry.
- [Rob] Oh good.
- Ninth Infantry Division,
reconnaissance, lurps, 67, 68.
- There is no way that we can forget Nam.
Not unless we get a lobotomy or something.
We have got to learn how
to use our experience.
We've gotta use the negative
and we've gotta use the positive
and we've gotta make it work
for us in our daily life now.
(somber music)
- I know I should give
these cigarettes up,
I don't even like 'em.
Sometimes I think they're the
only thing that keeps me going.
He never hit me.
I mean it was never anything like that.
My husband and I really tried.
At least I think we did.
Sure hasn't been easy.
Then again maybe it's not supposed to be.
But I know that I tried
and I still don't
understand what's happening.
- It's not so easy.
I mean what have we experienced
that we could ever compare it to?
- You know I'm not really scared
of him, I never have been.
But I guess what I am
scared about is how, well,
what he would do to himself
and like how he was affecting us.
But I still loved him and that's
the part that really hurts.
Sometimes I wish that love
was like a faucet, you know,
how you could just turn it on and off.
I'm sorry.
- Here you go.
- Thank you.
I get so tired of what's going on.
I get so tired of watching him destroy all
the wonderful things about
him that I love so much.
And my kid, he idolizes him.
And I can see the pain in his
eyes and I know that he knows.
I know that he knows that his father is.
I am so tired of it.
I am so tired of what's going on.
I don't know if we're gonna
get back together again,
but sometimes I don't really care.
I am so tired of Vietnam.
- You're late.
(giggling)
What?
- What?
- What was that for?
- What?
- That?
What is it?
You're hiding something
from me, what is it?
- Oh well you know me so well,
why don't you figure it out?
- Did you get a job?
- Mm hmm.
(squealing)
- [Paula] That's wonderful!
Where!?
Wait I'm sitting on a plate.
Oh I don't care.
- [Tim] I'm working at
Madam Woo's Sex Shop.
(laughing)
- How's the group going?
- Fine.
- Yeah?
- Yeah I'm learning.
- The other day I had a
woman Vet come in and we were
just talking and she said
to me, I wanna go back.
And I said to her why?
She said to me, I wanna go back
and find something that I left there.
I said what is it you wanna find?
She said, I wanna find the
me that I was before Vietnam.
And every one of us has something
that we have left there.
Paula we gotta talk.
Tim is not opening up and I don't think
he has any intention at all of opening up.
He's faced the fact that he has a problem,
but that's all he's gonna face.
He's frustrating me.
- Did he tell you that he got a job?
- No.
I'm glad.
- Listen Rob, I think everything's
gonna go back to normal now.
I really do.
- Bullshit.
You think it's that simple?
You think he can just get
a nice job, fall right into
the flow of society and
everything's gonna be wonderful?
- Well all I know is he didn't have
this problem before he lost his job.
- He had this problem long
before he met you Paula.
- We'd been out about 10 days.
We were checking out these hoochers
about four clicks from the LZ.
Nothing special.
Just a bunch of fucking gook hoochers.
You've seen them, hundreds
of them, nothing special.
Bobby, he was my pal,
we went through ITR together
before we got shipped over.
I mean we'd been together
in country from the first.
- What about the hoochers?
- We cleared out the
locals, moved 'em up away
from the village so we could
do a house to house check.
Bobby, he was by the
door of this one hooch,
calls out to me, someone
left a baby in here.
I can hear it crying.
I can hear the baby crying.
I looked at him, you know,
like he was full of shit or something.
That baby was just crying.
So Bobby goes in the hooch
and he calls out to me
that there's a baby.
Oh Jesus.
The baby, the hooch, it blew up.
It was all booby trapped.
He was just trying to help the baby.
- Get some Koolaid.
- Okay.
- Whew!
- Whoa what's all this about?
- This is definitely not early Lukian.
Just thought it was
time to clean up my act.
- You look like a used car salesman.
- Oh give me a break,
this is my new jacket.
This is my only jacket.
Anyway I thought I'd just
drop by and say hello.
I haven't seen your face,
not since we've been hustling jobs.
- You found something?
- Eh, it looks that way.
No I start next week.
- Good news!
Well looks like things
are turning around for us.
What uh?
- Yeah but that's not the real news.
I mean what all this get up is for.
Tonight, the night, me and my
old lady, just the two of us.
- Well that's great man.
- Yeah we're going down to
Mike Gordon's at the bay.
- Nice place.
- Yeah, yeah, that's where we
used to go when we were dating
and then we're gonna do a
little two footin' and then.
Oh I tell ya it's just like
old times, that feeling's back.
- So you're pulling out all the stops huh?
You're not nervous are you?
- You can tell huh?
It's been awhile.
- Well listen man, you know how I feel,
I hope everything goes great.
- Thanks.
Alright.
(laughing)
Alright give me a call later, will ya?
- I'll do it, I'll do it.
- Oh, I got a surprise for you.
- What?
Oh man, come on.
What?
Man.
What am I gonna do with this?
- Marry it.
- How's it going?
- I'll be damned.
I at least got the radio to work.
- Good.
It's nice and warm tonight.
- You know what this reminds me of?
- What?
- Nights like this we
used to go to the beach,
park and spark.
- Yeah after you went out
carousing with your buddies.
You remember that time
that Renee caught us.
- Oh yeah.
- Boy I had one pissed off sister.
- Well especially since I stood her up.
- You know I always
knew if I could get you
to go out with me just
one time, I had you.
- Oh really?
Huh?
Really uh, sure of ourselves weren't we?
- Well let's just say that
I knew what you needed.
You know I remember all of our dates.
You used to tell me how much you loved me.
- I had to say something so
I could get in your pants.
- Didn't work did it?
- Not all the time.
- I sure am glad I married you.
- I'm glad you married me too.
You know uh, I know
things haven't been so.
- Shh.
- [Ellen] Mommy, Ronnie's
flooding the bathroom.
- Right on cue.
Never fails.
I don't know how we ever had Ronnie.
(phone ringing)
Luke?
Hello?
- Hey buddy.
- Hey man, how'd it go?
- What's the word?
- Tell me, what happened,
how'd it go with your wife?
- The word's out, Charlie's coming,
but Charlie's coming tonight.
- What's going on man?
- She went and did it.
I never thought she would do it.
- What happened?
- She uh, she went and
filed for divorce and stuff.
She uh, she said she met someone,
someone else, someone that she can love.
- Oh man I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
- It's no problem man, it's
just no problem at all.
- Luke, do you wanna go have a beer?
How's that sound man, huh?
Yeah come go out with me,
we'll have a couple beers.
- The word's out man,
I said the word's out.
- Please Luke uh, come on go out with me
and have a couple beers.
Come out with me tonight man.
- I'm at the wire man.
- No man there is no wire.
- I can see Charlie.
I can see it coming through the wire.
- It's over Luke, it's all
over, you're not in Nam.
- It's gonna overrun us.
- [Tim] Please Luke don't.
- It's gonna overrun us again.
- Oh dear god Luke,
please listen to me man.
(gun shot blasting)
(intense music)
(explosions blasting)
- Tim!
(somber music)
- Well there you are.
Where'd you go?
Are you not gonna talk to me?
What happened?
I'm not gonna go back in the house.
I'll sit out here all night
if that's what you want.
I wanna know what happened.
- Do you wanna know what happened?
Luke just blew his fucking brains out.
- [Paula] Oh god.
- Just talked on the phone,
talked about his wife,
talked about Vietnam, then
he just blew his brains out.
When I got there they were
already taking him away.
- Oh honey I'm so sorry.
- God I don't want your sympathy.
I don't want your sympathy.
I don't need it!
- Tim, stop it, you're scaring me.
- Scared?
You know what scares me?
I'm scared when you can't see
'em and you know they're out
there, you know they're out
there, but you can't see 'em.
And then they, and then they
start walking those mortars
in on ya, they start bringing
'em in, walking 'em over ya.
Nothing can stop 'em.
- I wanna help you, but I don't know how.
I don't understand.
- Oh god get out of here!
(whimpering)
You don't understand.
None of you people understand!
You're going to the prom,
we're going out in the fucking bush.
- Stop it.
- Jesus I can't take the pressure.
(whimpering)
Make 'em stop please.
Help please.
Shh, shh, shh.
Did you hear that?
They're coming through the wire man.
Get down, they're coming through the wire.
Oh Jesus I can smell 'em, I can smell 'em,
I can always smell 'em.
We'll waste 'em, we'll waste 'em all.
Rafer?
Rafer, where's the cover man?
Where's the cover man?
Rafer, where's the cover man?
Oh my god, oh my god.
- No!
- Where's my gun, where's my gun?
- Stop it!
- No.
- Stop it!
- Where's my gun?
- Stop it!
You're not gonna do this to me!
I'm not gonna let you
do this to my family!
You're not in this by yourself, I'm here!
Listen to me!
I love you.
(sobbing)
- Oh my god.
Oh god.
- Present arms.
Port arm.
Prepare to fire.
Fire.
(gun shots cracking)
(military taps music)
- I heard you were his good friend.
Paula, thank you very much for being here.
- She's in my group.
I didn't know.
Tim, I didn't.
She never mentioned him by name.
- I'll meet ya at the car.
- Tim.
He didn't have to die.
Did he?
(somber music)
- Everyday I could feel
the seconds, the minutes.
Everything around you meant something.
You felt and heard everything.
The air, sun shining on your
face, nothing was lost to you.
Funny isn't it?
There's death all around you.
You never felt more alive in your life.
When someone bought it,
it hurt,
but you just kinda tried to laugh it off,
turn your back on it.
You say, it was his turn, hell with it.
You even start to believe
that you're invincible.
Nothing was gonna get you.
Sons of bitches still hadn't invented
the bullet that was gonna get you.
(ominous music)
There was a village.
Intelligence said that it
was a NVA stopover point.
Maybe even a POW camp.
We went in before sunrise,
landing a few clicks from the village.
It was a two company operation,
us from the southeast,
the other company from the north and west.
My fire team was just
entering the village area.
It was me, Sanchez, Rafer, and the Badman.
(intense music)
- [Rafer] Shit man I told you guys
Charlie had booked on outta here.
- [Sanchez] Yeah he knows I got
three days to go and
I'm kicking ass, Jack.
- Fuckin' A.
- Hey what's that sound?
It's a buzzing from over there.
- Fuck it looks like a well.
- Let's check it out.
- Stay away from there man.
- Ready, go.
(loud buzzing)
Man I told you to stay away from there.
- Oh no!
No!
- I told you to stay away from there.
(gun shots blasting)
- Stay down man, get back.
(yelling)
Get out!
(loud explosions)
(screaming)
- Help me!
Don't leave me here.
Don't leave me here.
- No way I'm leaving you.
Come on.
(screaming)
- Come on!
(intense music)
- No, no wait man.
Wait Badman, he's coming man.
I can see him, there he
is, he's crawling man.
He's alive, dammit he's alive.
(loud explosion)
Get him.
- [Soldier] Forget it man,
they're gonna shoot us down.
- Look, look I can see him crawling man.
He's alive!
He's alive, please sweet Jesus.
- Tim!
- Please, please don't let him die.
I saw in the well man, I
know what they'll do to him.
I saw in the well.
Please don't let him die.
Jesus.
- Tim!
- Badman forgive me.
Forgive me.
(gun shots echoing)
(sobbing)
I'm sorry.
(crying)
(peaceful music)
- Welcome home.
(dramatic music)
♫ I've tried to forget the pain inside
♫ Tried everyway I know how
♫ But the memory burns deep in my soul
♫ All I want is to really live again
♫ I can see a certain look in your eyes
♫ I can tell that you've been there too
♫ I can tell that you hurt just like me
♫ And you know
♫ All I want is to really live again
♫ As long as we've got each other
♫ And nobody seems to care
♫ We've got someone who knows
♫ Someone who cares
♫ We've got each other
♫ When the rest of the world turns away
♫ We've got each other
♫ To carry the pain
♫ Can't say it's gotten much easier
♫ Wounds heal, but the scars remain
♫ I don't have to tell you
how empty I feel sometimes
♫ 'Cause you know
♫ All I want is to really live again
♫ As long as we've got each other
♫ And nobody seems to care
♫ We've got someone who knows
♫ Someone who cares
♫ We've got each other
♫ When the rest of the world turns away
♫ We've got someone who
understands just how hard it is
♫ To carry the pain
♫ As long as we've got each other
♫ We've got each other
♫ To carry the pain
(intense music)
(heavy breathing)
- How long have you been unemployed?
Have you been actively looking
for employment this past month?
Have you been offered employment?
Next.
You have to finish filling out the back.
There's a counter over there.
- Uh, do you have a pen I could use?
- There's pens on the counter.
- Well do I have to
wait in that line again?
- Look, just finish filling out the form
then you can bring it
right back to me, okay?
- Hey man.
- Thanks.
- We have schedules, we
have schedules to keep,
you can't be coming every
time you're scheduled.
- I'm asking, I'm asking.
- Excuse me, excuse me a second.
Excuse me.
Uh the lady that was here before,
she said I could bring
this right back up to her.
- You're going to have to wait
in line like everyone else.
- No, you see I already waited in line.
- What makes you so special?
- There she is.
Excuse me, Senorita, could you?
- Look, I'm not going to do
anything about your application
until you get back to the end of the line.
- Look, I already waited in line once.
- Well I got a hair appointment.
- I got a job interview and I.
- Sir.
I'm sorry, you're gonna have to
step to the back of the line.
- Just take this and shove it up your ass.
- Stole my pen.
- Don't give me the sorry bit,
don't give me the sorry bit.
Pick up your orders,
get 'em out to the
customers before they leave.
- Boy he's in a good mood today.
- Will you just move it?
Move it.
- Ah he's a pussy cat.
Cute.
The old spoon trick huh?
- Oh it ain't too far for
you to reach, is it mama?
I left ya a tip.
- Well thank you.
- I didn't have to.
It's just ah, just a way of, you know,
trying to tell ya something, you know.
- Like you're sorry?
- Well kinda.
I am okay, sorry.
- Okay you're forgiven.
- Okay, bye.
- Bye.
Ronnie open your mouth.
Open your mouth!
Ronnie please take the medicine.
Come on it's good for you,
it'll make you feel better.
Ronnie open your mouth, open it.
Open your mouth.
- It's good for you Ronnie,
it tastes like candy.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Where's the rubber bands?
- In the junk drawer.
- Big junk drawer or little junk drawer?
- Little junk drawer.
How was that?
- Yuck!
- Ha ha, tricked you.
- I think it's time for bed.
(growling)
- Bed time!
- [Ronnie] Do we have to?
- [Tim] Yes you have to.
- Yes.
- Goodnight Mom.
Goodnight Mom.
- Goodnight.
- Goodnight Mom.
(yelping)
Will they catch him?
- [Ronnie] I'm gonna get you,
you'll forget by tomorrow.
- Nobody's gonna get
anybody, you're going to bed.
Ellen take your barrettes out.
That's probably not too
good on your tummy, is it?
Night night.
Hop up.
In you go.
- Goodnight Daddy.
- Goodnight sweetheart.
We're going to sleep now right?
No parties, no games.
On three you're asleep.
One, two, three, sleep.
You're not asleep.
Goodnight, I love you.
- I love you too.
Hey!
- Oh yeah I forgot.
You know there's nothing to be afraid of.
- I know.
- Gum.
Ugh.
(giggling)
Goodnight.
- Goodnight.
- Goodnight.
Oh I forgot, I have a headache.
(laughing)
- Okay, fine.
What the?
- What's that?
My goodness there's a tennis
shoe under your pillow.
- Yeah with two tickets on it.
Nassau.
Are these for us?
- No, no, I bought them
for Bill and Beverly.
- Oh my god.
We can't afford this.
Can we afford this?
- No, but we're going anyway.
(lip smacking)
My headache just went away.
- [Paula] Oh good.
(moaning)
(mellow country music)
- Things are definitely looking up.
Hi Patty.
All teased up.
- Mm hmm.
- Um let me have a nice uh tall cool one.
Hey how ya doing?
Boy that was some bullshit down there.
- I'm sorry, I don't know what you mean.
- I was there the other day,
down at the Unemployment Office.
The other day.
The other day when you went
down to sign up for unemployment.
- Oh yeah, you were in the other line.
- Yeah, right, that's when
you noticed my jacket.
- Yeah I did, didn't I.
I think I owe you a pen.
- Ah that's no problem, you can keep it.
So, how long were you in country?
- What makes you think I was?
- You got a familiar look.
Can I buy you a beer?
Don't let the earring fool yah, sailor.
- Yeah, sure.
(laughing)
We laughed 'til we
thought we were gonna die.
Oh man.
- Oh.
Boy that is Army, that is Army.
(laughing)
Here's more Army for ya.
It's Easter time and I'm
still real green, right.
We're expecting our hot
meal in for the day.
So these guys run down to
the slick when it comes in
and there's incoming all over.
They drop the meal onto
some other crate there
and they give us a box of
Halloween costumes and decorations.
You think these guys tossed them away?
They were out there on the LZ with bunting
and throwing streamers
around like a parade.
And there's Jimmy Hendrix
blasting all over the place.
I kept wondering.
My problem was I was
wondering what the VC was
gonna think about us, like
we went nuts or something.
Oh god I just couldn't
help but dream about home,
that's all I could think about.
I kept thinking okay, somebody
just yell out timeout,
start this dream over.
And I'd be in it.
Home.
- Yeah.
There wasn't anything to
think about but to go home.
- Hey Badman, what you
gonna do when get home baby?
- Man he's coming with me to Miami.
- Shit yeah man.
Me and Tim here, we're gonna
buy ourselves a fuckin' boat
and open ourselves up a
charter fishing service, man.
Permanent R&R in the sun.
- Right on.
- What the fuck do you know about boats?
You're from Pennsylvania.
- Man you don't have to
know nothing about boats.
You just gotta lay back
between the controls
and rake in all that money from all them
fat cat Yankees that come on down.
(cheering)
- Yes!
- Shit man, I don't envy the
Coast Guard or nothing man.
They're gonna be busy as hell
saving your balls everyday.
- Check this out.
- One foxy lady man.
- I tell you though, her
little sister's the one.
Paula.
- She's got a sister?
- Yeah right there.
There she is, that's the one.
She writes to me more than Renee does.
She's uh, Paula Murphy.
(loud explosion)
- God damn, fucking generator again.
- Shit.
- When it rains like this,
it reminds me of a spring day back home.
- Home.
(yelling)
I can't wait!
- Man, you know what I'm gonna do
when I get back to the world?
- Say what?
- I'm gonna go and I'm
gonna buy me a VW man.
Then I'm gonna pick up my girl,
man we're gonna go travel
around the whole country.
You know maybe someday
I'll come visit you guys.
- Hey.
- Hear that Rafer man,
god damn reeking in a bug.
- Fuck you Badman.
- A fucking reeker!
Right on.
(laughing)
- Damn man, why don't you
guys just cut it out man.
Fuck all of you guys man.
- What happened man?
I thought you'd be halfway
to California by now.
- Plane got hit coming in this morning.
Four of them bought the farm.
Which ends all the flights out today.
- Hey Hart, you ever
gonna leave this country?
Or are you planning on being
buried in this shit hole?
- Bullshit man.
(upbeat rock music)
♫ Could you please take me there someday
♫ Alone I'll just get lost
- Honey.
Hun?
- Hmm?
- We got our third notice.
- What third notice?
- The TV people.
- What about it?
- Well you said you were
gonna take care of it.
Are you?
- There, it's taken care of.
- Hey, I was watching that.
- No you weren't, you
were playing that game.
Here, send that with the next payment.
Ellen go see about Ronnie.
Well what was that stunt all about?
- I'm tired of hearing
about that goddamn TV.
I'm tired of people fuckin' with me.
- Oh don't give me that.
I know there's something
else bothering you
and I wanna know what it is.
- Don't start with me Paula.
Don't start with me.
- I'm not, I don't wanna fight,
I just wanna know what's going on.
(somber music)
(loud explosion)
(screaming)
- Hey, hey man, stay
down here and get down.
Stay down.
What's the matter with you?
- Oh Christ.
- You okay?
- Yeah sure, sure I'm okay.
Sure.
- Man, you promise you won't
laugh if I tell you something?
- What is it?
- I'm scared.
I'm scared shitless.
- Oh yeah.
Well if you want to man
you can hold my hand.
(loud explosion)
- It's okay man, it's okay.
Everything's gonna be alright.
(upbeat music)
(groaning)
So this is your art?
- This is definitely early Lukeian.
- That's some weird shit man.
- It is weird shit.
- Whoa, look at this.
Silver Star, a Bronze Star,
two Bronze Stars with valor.
Purple Heart, and an Air Medal.
Got a real fuckin' hero.
- Up yours too.
It doesn't buy a cup of coffee.
- Yeah no shit.
Nice frame though.
- You still got yours?
- Oh no.
I must've lost 'em or something.
- Well my wife she just wanted me
to keep 'em for the kid, so.
Then she put 'em in this
thing, she kind made it, yanno.
I've even got some of my pictures still.
Catch.
- [Tim] Vet center?
- Yeah well, they uh
kinda helped at one time.
- What for?
- Helped me find a job
once, then uh I went down
to help out with some of
the guys who were a mess.
They just had to talk, you know,
so they just liked to
talk, rap, they gotta rap.
- Having all this shit
around, doesn't it make ya?
Damn, I just wanna forget about it.
Viet fucking Nam, what a fucking jerk off.
- Yeah well that's pretty specific.
I'll drink to that.
- [Woman] We are happy to
present our child to be baptized.
- You have asked to have
your child baptized.
In doing so, you are
accepting the responsibility
of training him in the
progress of the faith.
It will be your duty to
bring him up to keep God's
commandments as Christ does by
loving God and our neighbor.
Do you clearly understand
what you are undertaking?
- We do.
- [Priest] Are you ready to
help the progress of the child
in the duty of Christian of parents.
- We are.
(baby crying)
- We do.
We do.
(baby crying)
(ominous music)
(loud explosion)
- [Priest] Parents and Godparents,
this light is entrusted to you
to be kept burning brightly.
This child of yours has
been enlightened by Christ.
- What happened?
- I dunno, uh.
I dunno it just got on my nerves.
It was so hot in there, you know?
- It wasn't that hot.
Hey is something wrong?
- Yes, something is wrong.
- Okay.
- I just don't feel good, okay?
- Fine.
Sorry.
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Look it's just, I dunno
it just got on my nerves.
The baby was crying and.
I guess I kinda messed things up, huh?
- No, no you didn't.
Honey it was just a baby crying, you know?
You've heard babies cry before.
- I know.
- I just want you to be honest with me.
- I'm alright.
I just haven't been feeling very good.
Maybe I'm catching Ronnie's bug.
- Look at how green that field is.
It reminds me of Nam.
Boy all they had was rocks,
no grass, when I played on it.
You know what my first
impression of Nam was?
It was that I'd never
seen anything so green.
I couldn't figure out how could anything
with so much life hold so much death.
- You played ball?
- Yeah, sure.
Come on man we better get some work
or we can both go on welfare together.
- That's not funny man.
- I know it's not, but
you gotta lighten up.
- I can't afford to lighten up.
- Okay.
Give me 50 cents, I'll go make some calls.
- Here, Paula gave me a
dollar, you can have half.
- All I want is half.
Oh, give me the number
down by the airport.
- Paula?
Hi.
- Hey.
- How are you doing?
- Oh fine.
- You got time to get a bite or something?
- Sure, why not.
- Well you know, it's probably temporary.
I mean I'm sure as soon as
he gets a job he'll be fine,
he'll snap right out of it.
- God I hope you're right.
Listen I gotta tell you something, okay?
See it's not just this time, I mean,
something else happened too.
- What?
- See I remember when
we first started dating,
we'd be like laying out at the park,
you know making out and all that.
Any little noise, I mean
anything, he would jump.
And then right after we got married,
he would wake up in the middle
of the night in like a sweat.
You know?
- Did he say anything?
- Well he said it was just nightmares.
Anyway everything just
stopped after awhile.
The kids came and everything.
He never said anything about it.
I dunno, I didn't wanna push it.
Maybe that was a mistake
on my part, I don't know.
- Hey, listen it's gonna be okay huh?
It'll be fine.
- I'm sorry.
- [Wendy] It's okay.
- Thanks.
- [Wendy] Yeah.
- There's my boy.
Hey Ronnie, come here, I
want you to meet somebody.
Hey, Ronnie.
- No let him be man, he's just scared.
Stranger and all that, let him be.
- Yeah sure.
Kids.
Come on, dinner must be almost ready.
- Thanks.
- You haven't tasted the food yet man.
- Hey, do you snore at night?
- No.
- How do you know?
If you're asleep, how can you tell?
- My ears are open.
- Ah, but how do you know?
- [Ronnie] 'Cause my ears are open.
- Okay I'll buy that.
Okay I'm gonna give you
another piece of gum
if you pop your muscles and
show 'em to me one time.
Let me see.
OH, oh, we are in trouble.
But you won, I'll give you the gum.
Here's one for you.
And one for you.
- He must miss his kid.
- Are you in the Scouts yet?
- No, he's too young.
- Oh really, what are you the big girl?
Huh?
Gonna hide from me?
I'll rub my whiskers on you.
What are you looking at?
I'll get you too huh.
- Get him.
- Hey, hey, hey, that's enough.
- Well you've done it now Luke.
- Come on, come on.
- [Ellen] Can't Luke tuck us in?
- No, Luke can't tuck you in.
- [Ellen] Why?
- I don't mind, I don't mind.
- You sure?
- Sure.
- Okay, they're yours.
- Okay.
- Come on kids.
Are these gonna go away some day?
- No, they won't go away.
They'll always be there.
- I love you.
- I love you.
(intense music)
(heavy breathing)
(somber music)
(intense music)
(suspenseful music)
(distant rattling)
- Look I don't even know if
I'm in the right place, so.
- Well maybe it isn't and maybe it is,
but let's talk about it anyway.
What made you think about coming here?
- Well, I um, I found
this in my husband's coat.
- Can you be a little more
specific about your husband?
Do you think that he is going through
changes now that are related to Nam?
- Well I wouldn't be here if
I didn't think that would I?
I told ya I found that in his pocket.
And the other morning when I
was taking out the garbage,
I found his medals and uh,
he was throwing them away.
- That's uh, not unusual.
A lot of the Vets will try to throw away
anything that reminds them of Nam.
What's his name?
- I'm not gonna tell you his name.
I don't want you calling him
up, telling him I came here.
- Do you think that he would be
willing to come down to a meeting?
- No.
- Would you be willing to come down
to a meeting of the wives?
It'll help you to understand
your husband a lot better
if you can sit down and have
communication with women
who have had a very,
very similar experience.
Yeah?
- If it'll help my
husband, I'll do anything.
- Looks good.
I think we can use you.
- Man it's good to hear those words again.
- Yeah I bet things have
been hard out there.
- You ain't a kidding.
- Yeah how about uh, can
you start next Monday?
- Man I can start today,
I got no problems at all.
- Fine, fine, how about a cup of coffee.
- Uh no, no thanks.
- Well you know I noticed
on your application
that you were in Vietnam.
- Yes sir I was.
- Was in the Core myself.
Yeah now that was a real war.
- I'm sure it was.
- Yeah.
I landed on Iwo Jima.
Second wave in.
You know I went to basic training
for 10 weeks with a kid called Eli Kyle.
He was the first one to get it,
as soon as the doors opened
on that landing craft.
Do you know what the
tragedy is about Vietnam?
Nobody really knew why
the hell we were there.
- Yes well uh, I guess.
- You know I got a kid,
just about your age.
You know how he got outta that war?
Smart kid.
He went out and found a
doctor, had him write a letter
saying he had a bad back
and that's how he got out.
First of course, you
know, I was really pissed.
I mean when you get called to
serve your country, you go,
just like I did.
Sorry to have to say it
but, the old US government,
Johnson, Nixon, you know they
really had you pulled in,
they really sucked you in.
Nobody honestly wanted to go to Vietnam.
There was nothing there.
It was nothing but a suckers
war, that's all it was.
(intense music)
(loud smashing)
- Ted!
Ted what's going on?
What the hell did you do?
Okay game time, you wanna take it out,
you wanna take this place out?
- No.
No.
No, come on man.
Come on.
- Oh you, you're lucky.
(screaming)
Hey see this man.
- What?
- This man is the very
site of my greatest moment.
We were up 20 to 16 with about
a minute left to play in the game.
Century, they were driving,
they had the ball right on the 12.
Oh man I gotta show you this.
I gotta show you this.
- [Ted] What?
- [Luke] Alright, you're
that guy from Century.
- [Ted] No I don't wanna be that.
- [Luke] Yeah you gotta
be the guy from Century,
he's just a candy ass.
- [Ted] I don't wanna be.
- [Luke] His name is Weber.
And he's got a big winning smile.
The biggest hotdog you ever saw.
Okay, alright.
Now you stand there.
Okay.
I'm playing safety and
they send their guy out.
That's you.
- Me?
- Get over there.
Okay, now I'm in the
middle, I'm in the middle,
I look over, I look over,
and you've just faked out
a man that's covering you.
- I just faked you out man.
- And I haul ass after ya,
quarterback releases the ball,
and Weber's with his arms out waiting.
Lift your arms and smile, smile you fuck!
(screaming)
And I grab the ball and it
popped free, I got the sucker,
and I waltz 102 yards for a touchdown.
And the crowd, they went nuts.
- You made me spill my beer, you fuck.
- Fuck your beer.
I just told you the
greatest moment of my life.
And I lied about the touchdown.
17 years it's been.
So long ago it was.
And I haven't had anything like it since.
Dammit.
It was supposed to be like this, you know?
It was supposed to be different.
It was supposed to be better.
I mean I didn't expect
much, I didn't expect.
I mean, no horseshit parade.
Besides when I got back from Nam
my fuckin' feet were killin' me.
I expected to live, I just
expected to live my life.
I have the love of my wife and son.
But somebody, some
asshole changed the rules
to the game in the middle
of the fuckin' play.
Nobody dropped the flag.
I wanna tell ya man,
sometimes I think that the guys
we lost over there have it better off.
- Surviving, coming back,
that's the real hell.
- Well they came through
the wire one night,
I don't know how many.
Boy we fired and fired.
There was just this big
wall of people coming at us.
And they overran our position.
(somber music)
I don't know what happened after that.
I still have dreams.
They said that we were overrun
and that we fought hand
to hand for four hours.
I don't know if that's true or not.
And the next day they found me alive.
I was the only one there
and I was still hugging this sapper.
I mean I was still hugging him
and I just like held him,
kept jamming my knife into him.
Every now and then I wake up
in the middle of the night
and I see his face, his eyes are open,
and he's begging me.
(crying)
- Come on Luke, let's go home.
Let's go home.
- Home.
- I'm home.
Hey, I said I was home.
- You're late.
- Well I'm hungry.
- Well then you should've come
home when it was dinner time.
- Honey don't give me any shit,
just make me something to eat, alright?
- Stop it.
- Well what the hell is wrong with you?
- Oh there's nothing wrong with me.
- Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.
What the hell is wrong with you?
- Would you just leave me alone?
Just go fall asleep somewhere.
Take your drunken stupor somewhere else.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, listen, lady,
I don't have to take any shit from you.
- Let go of me.
- Would you just tell
me what's wrong then?
- Nothing is wrong.
Tim is this gonna be the new thing now,
you coming home drunk every night?
- Oh Jesus, I don't need
this shit, I don't need it.
- [Paula] Well neither do I.
- Well then let's just forget
it alright, just forget it!
- No I'm not gonna forget it.
I wanna know what the hell you think
you were doing the other night.
- What night?
- The night your son saw his father
crawling around the
living room with a knife!
That night!
Dammit what is wrong with you?
- I don't know what you're talking about.
- You know damn well
what I'm talking about.
- [Tim] I don't know what
you're talking about.
- You're gonna answer me.
You are!
- I don't wanna talk about it.
- You had your son scared half to death.
- I don't wanna, let go.
- You gotta talk about it.
- I don't want, dammit let go of me.
(loud thudding)
(screaming)
Paula.
- Don't touch me.
- Paula.
I'm sorry.
- Get away from me.
- Oh no, my god.
Paula.
- [Paula] Get away from me!
- [Tim] Paula.
- Go away.
(crying)
Ronnie, come on Ronnie.
Ronnie.
Ronnie, come on.
(calm country music)
Well?
(somber music)
I still have some dinner
left if you're hungry.
I haven't put it up yet.
Tim I was worried about you.
I even called around
looking for you, you know.
I'm just glad you came home.
- I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
- I know.
- I've been thinking about things,
I've been thinking a lot about it.
At first I, I thought I could say it was,
you know an accident, I was drunk.
But it was no accident.
I'm sorry for hurting you.
- [Paula] Oh I love you.
I love you so much.
- I'm thinking and going over and over
and I don't know how or what it is.
Something so deep, so deep inside of me.
Sometimes I just pray to
God that he would just.
Oh Paula I need help.
- Hi I'm Larry uh I was in Vietnam 67,68,
uh I was with the First Air Cav.
- Uh Bill West, Third Marine
Division, force recon.
I was stationed at Pleiku, 70, 71.
That's about it.
- Charles P. Harris.
- [Rob] You ever find out
what the P stands for?
- Not exactly.
Anyway, stationed in Cam
Ranh Bay, truck driving
all the way to Saigon, Phan
Thiet, partial the way.
And that was in 70 to 71 but it was
a trying time in my life, you know.
- Name's Eric, Third Marines.
68, February, when uh, when
the good times used to roll.
- Uh Tim Murphy, First
Cav, High Core, 70, 71.
Did our part in uh An Khe.
- Sergeant Gerald Stanley,
you can call me Gerry.
- [Rob] Oh good.
- Ninth Infantry Division,
reconnaissance, lurps, 67, 68.
- There is no way that we can forget Nam.
Not unless we get a lobotomy or something.
We have got to learn how
to use our experience.
We've gotta use the negative
and we've gotta use the positive
and we've gotta make it work
for us in our daily life now.
(somber music)
- I know I should give
these cigarettes up,
I don't even like 'em.
Sometimes I think they're the
only thing that keeps me going.
He never hit me.
I mean it was never anything like that.
My husband and I really tried.
At least I think we did.
Sure hasn't been easy.
Then again maybe it's not supposed to be.
But I know that I tried
and I still don't
understand what's happening.
- It's not so easy.
I mean what have we experienced
that we could ever compare it to?
- You know I'm not really scared
of him, I never have been.
But I guess what I am
scared about is how, well,
what he would do to himself
and like how he was affecting us.
But I still loved him and that's
the part that really hurts.
Sometimes I wish that love
was like a faucet, you know,
how you could just turn it on and off.
I'm sorry.
- Here you go.
- Thank you.
I get so tired of what's going on.
I get so tired of watching him destroy all
the wonderful things about
him that I love so much.
And my kid, he idolizes him.
And I can see the pain in his
eyes and I know that he knows.
I know that he knows that his father is.
I am so tired of it.
I am so tired of what's going on.
I don't know if we're gonna
get back together again,
but sometimes I don't really care.
I am so tired of Vietnam.
- You're late.
(giggling)
What?
- What?
- What was that for?
- What?
- That?
What is it?
You're hiding something
from me, what is it?
- Oh well you know me so well,
why don't you figure it out?
- Did you get a job?
- Mm hmm.
(squealing)
- [Paula] That's wonderful!
Where!?
Wait I'm sitting on a plate.
Oh I don't care.
- [Tim] I'm working at
Madam Woo's Sex Shop.
(laughing)
- How's the group going?
- Fine.
- Yeah?
- Yeah I'm learning.
- The other day I had a
woman Vet come in and we were
just talking and she said
to me, I wanna go back.
And I said to her why?
She said to me, I wanna go back
and find something that I left there.
I said what is it you wanna find?
She said, I wanna find the
me that I was before Vietnam.
And every one of us has something
that we have left there.
Paula we gotta talk.
Tim is not opening up and I don't think
he has any intention at all of opening up.
He's faced the fact that he has a problem,
but that's all he's gonna face.
He's frustrating me.
- Did he tell you that he got a job?
- No.
I'm glad.
- Listen Rob, I think everything's
gonna go back to normal now.
I really do.
- Bullshit.
You think it's that simple?
You think he can just get
a nice job, fall right into
the flow of society and
everything's gonna be wonderful?
- Well all I know is he didn't have
this problem before he lost his job.
- He had this problem long
before he met you Paula.
- We'd been out about 10 days.
We were checking out these hoochers
about four clicks from the LZ.
Nothing special.
Just a bunch of fucking gook hoochers.
You've seen them, hundreds
of them, nothing special.
Bobby, he was my pal,
we went through ITR together
before we got shipped over.
I mean we'd been together
in country from the first.
- What about the hoochers?
- We cleared out the
locals, moved 'em up away
from the village so we could
do a house to house check.
Bobby, he was by the
door of this one hooch,
calls out to me, someone
left a baby in here.
I can hear it crying.
I can hear the baby crying.
I looked at him, you know,
like he was full of shit or something.
That baby was just crying.
So Bobby goes in the hooch
and he calls out to me
that there's a baby.
Oh Jesus.
The baby, the hooch, it blew up.
It was all booby trapped.
He was just trying to help the baby.
- Get some Koolaid.
- Okay.
- Whew!
- Whoa what's all this about?
- This is definitely not early Lukian.
Just thought it was
time to clean up my act.
- You look like a used car salesman.
- Oh give me a break,
this is my new jacket.
This is my only jacket.
Anyway I thought I'd just
drop by and say hello.
I haven't seen your face,
not since we've been hustling jobs.
- You found something?
- Eh, it looks that way.
No I start next week.
- Good news!
Well looks like things
are turning around for us.
What uh?
- Yeah but that's not the real news.
I mean what all this get up is for.
Tonight, the night, me and my
old lady, just the two of us.
- Well that's great man.
- Yeah we're going down to
Mike Gordon's at the bay.
- Nice place.
- Yeah, yeah, that's where we
used to go when we were dating
and then we're gonna do a
little two footin' and then.
Oh I tell ya it's just like
old times, that feeling's back.
- So you're pulling out all the stops huh?
You're not nervous are you?
- You can tell huh?
It's been awhile.
- Well listen man, you know how I feel,
I hope everything goes great.
- Thanks.
Alright.
(laughing)
Alright give me a call later, will ya?
- I'll do it, I'll do it.
- Oh, I got a surprise for you.
- What?
Oh man, come on.
What?
Man.
What am I gonna do with this?
- Marry it.
- How's it going?
- I'll be damned.
I at least got the radio to work.
- Good.
It's nice and warm tonight.
- You know what this reminds me of?
- What?
- Nights like this we
used to go to the beach,
park and spark.
- Yeah after you went out
carousing with your buddies.
You remember that time
that Renee caught us.
- Oh yeah.
- Boy I had one pissed off sister.
- Well especially since I stood her up.
- You know I always
knew if I could get you
to go out with me just
one time, I had you.
- Oh really?
Huh?
Really uh, sure of ourselves weren't we?
- Well let's just say that
I knew what you needed.
You know I remember all of our dates.
You used to tell me how much you loved me.
- I had to say something so
I could get in your pants.
- Didn't work did it?
- Not all the time.
- I sure am glad I married you.
- I'm glad you married me too.
You know uh, I know
things haven't been so.
- Shh.
- [Ellen] Mommy, Ronnie's
flooding the bathroom.
- Right on cue.
Never fails.
I don't know how we ever had Ronnie.
(phone ringing)
Luke?
Hello?
- Hey buddy.
- Hey man, how'd it go?
- What's the word?
- Tell me, what happened,
how'd it go with your wife?
- The word's out, Charlie's coming,
but Charlie's coming tonight.
- What's going on man?
- She went and did it.
I never thought she would do it.
- What happened?
- She uh, she went and
filed for divorce and stuff.
She uh, she said she met someone,
someone else, someone that she can love.
- Oh man I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
- It's no problem man, it's
just no problem at all.
- Luke, do you wanna go have a beer?
How's that sound man, huh?
Yeah come go out with me,
we'll have a couple beers.
- The word's out man,
I said the word's out.
- Please Luke uh, come on go out with me
and have a couple beers.
Come out with me tonight man.
- I'm at the wire man.
- No man there is no wire.
- I can see Charlie.
I can see it coming through the wire.
- It's over Luke, it's all
over, you're not in Nam.
- It's gonna overrun us.
- [Tim] Please Luke don't.
- It's gonna overrun us again.
- Oh dear god Luke,
please listen to me man.
(gun shot blasting)
(intense music)
(explosions blasting)
- Tim!
(somber music)
- Well there you are.
Where'd you go?
Are you not gonna talk to me?
What happened?
I'm not gonna go back in the house.
I'll sit out here all night
if that's what you want.
I wanna know what happened.
- Do you wanna know what happened?
Luke just blew his fucking brains out.
- [Paula] Oh god.
- Just talked on the phone,
talked about his wife,
talked about Vietnam, then
he just blew his brains out.
When I got there they were
already taking him away.
- Oh honey I'm so sorry.
- God I don't want your sympathy.
I don't want your sympathy.
I don't need it!
- Tim, stop it, you're scaring me.
- Scared?
You know what scares me?
I'm scared when you can't see
'em and you know they're out
there, you know they're out
there, but you can't see 'em.
And then they, and then they
start walking those mortars
in on ya, they start bringing
'em in, walking 'em over ya.
Nothing can stop 'em.
- I wanna help you, but I don't know how.
I don't understand.
- Oh god get out of here!
(whimpering)
You don't understand.
None of you people understand!
You're going to the prom,
we're going out in the fucking bush.
- Stop it.
- Jesus I can't take the pressure.
(whimpering)
Make 'em stop please.
Help please.
Shh, shh, shh.
Did you hear that?
They're coming through the wire man.
Get down, they're coming through the wire.
Oh Jesus I can smell 'em, I can smell 'em,
I can always smell 'em.
We'll waste 'em, we'll waste 'em all.
Rafer?
Rafer, where's the cover man?
Where's the cover man?
Rafer, where's the cover man?
Oh my god, oh my god.
- No!
- Where's my gun, where's my gun?
- Stop it!
- No.
- Stop it!
- Where's my gun?
- Stop it!
You're not gonna do this to me!
I'm not gonna let you
do this to my family!
You're not in this by yourself, I'm here!
Listen to me!
I love you.
(sobbing)
- Oh my god.
Oh god.
- Present arms.
Port arm.
Prepare to fire.
Fire.
(gun shots cracking)
(military taps music)
- I heard you were his good friend.
Paula, thank you very much for being here.
- She's in my group.
I didn't know.
Tim, I didn't.
She never mentioned him by name.
- I'll meet ya at the car.
- Tim.
He didn't have to die.
Did he?
(somber music)
- Everyday I could feel
the seconds, the minutes.
Everything around you meant something.
You felt and heard everything.
The air, sun shining on your
face, nothing was lost to you.
Funny isn't it?
There's death all around you.
You never felt more alive in your life.
When someone bought it,
it hurt,
but you just kinda tried to laugh it off,
turn your back on it.
You say, it was his turn, hell with it.
You even start to believe
that you're invincible.
Nothing was gonna get you.
Sons of bitches still hadn't invented
the bullet that was gonna get you.
(ominous music)
There was a village.
Intelligence said that it
was a NVA stopover point.
Maybe even a POW camp.
We went in before sunrise,
landing a few clicks from the village.
It was a two company operation,
us from the southeast,
the other company from the north and west.
My fire team was just
entering the village area.
It was me, Sanchez, Rafer, and the Badman.
(intense music)
- [Rafer] Shit man I told you guys
Charlie had booked on outta here.
- [Sanchez] Yeah he knows I got
three days to go and
I'm kicking ass, Jack.
- Fuckin' A.
- Hey what's that sound?
It's a buzzing from over there.
- Fuck it looks like a well.
- Let's check it out.
- Stay away from there man.
- Ready, go.
(loud buzzing)
Man I told you to stay away from there.
- Oh no!
No!
- I told you to stay away from there.
(gun shots blasting)
- Stay down man, get back.
(yelling)
Get out!
(loud explosions)
(screaming)
- Help me!
Don't leave me here.
Don't leave me here.
- No way I'm leaving you.
Come on.
(screaming)
- Come on!
(intense music)
- No, no wait man.
Wait Badman, he's coming man.
I can see him, there he
is, he's crawling man.
He's alive, dammit he's alive.
(loud explosion)
Get him.
- [Soldier] Forget it man,
they're gonna shoot us down.
- Look, look I can see him crawling man.
He's alive!
He's alive, please sweet Jesus.
- Tim!
- Please, please don't let him die.
I saw in the well man, I
know what they'll do to him.
I saw in the well.
Please don't let him die.
Jesus.
- Tim!
- Badman forgive me.
Forgive me.
(gun shots echoing)
(sobbing)
I'm sorry.
(crying)
(peaceful music)
- Welcome home.
(dramatic music)
♫ I've tried to forget the pain inside
♫ Tried everyway I know how
♫ But the memory burns deep in my soul
♫ All I want is to really live again
♫ I can see a certain look in your eyes
♫ I can tell that you've been there too
♫ I can tell that you hurt just like me
♫ And you know
♫ All I want is to really live again
♫ As long as we've got each other
♫ And nobody seems to care
♫ We've got someone who knows
♫ Someone who cares
♫ We've got each other
♫ When the rest of the world turns away
♫ We've got each other
♫ To carry the pain
♫ Can't say it's gotten much easier
♫ Wounds heal, but the scars remain
♫ I don't have to tell you
how empty I feel sometimes
♫ 'Cause you know
♫ All I want is to really live again
♫ As long as we've got each other
♫ And nobody seems to care
♫ We've got someone who knows
♫ Someone who cares
♫ We've got each other
♫ When the rest of the world turns away
♫ We've got someone who
understands just how hard it is
♫ To carry the pain
♫ As long as we've got each other
♫ We've got each other
♫ To carry the pain