Cat and Mouse (2003) - full transcript
Zhan Zhao is a deputy to the wise Judge Bao. When Zhan heads back home for a vacation, he uncovers a plot to assassinate Bao so that a rebel group can overthrow the Emperor.
In the Song Dynasty
there lived a famous Judge
Bao Qing Tian
He's got an elite team
featuring legendary Zhan Zhao
Bao has the license to kill
He's renowned for
his dedication and fairness
These are peaceful times
Today is November 7th
A bad day
I can't pull out my sword
Zhan, hurry up. We've got work to do
Zhan, drink your soya milk
before Zhang Long drinks yours too
If you didn't eat my cruller
I wouldn't be drinking soya milk
You don't think he's gone mad?
Damn. What's wrong with it?
Leave it
Judge will be mad if we don't go now
Are you talking about me?
Judge Bao
We're just talking about Zhan
Inspector Zhan
let the proceedings begin
Judge Bao speaks
It is our duty
to relieve His Majesty's burdens
Please
As imperial officials
citizens are our own children
Let's proceed
Justice Bao rules the district court
Justice prevails under Iron Face
Brave men come to promote his cost
Wang and Ma are at his side
Flying Mouse is light as wind
Striding Mouse is a good chap
Drilling Mouse has fists of steel
Diving Mouse fights with might
Court
Judge Bao, two hours have passed
Boring
Not bad
There had not been a case
for three months
It's a blessing
Gongsun, what's to bless?
The Guizhou magistrate rapes
The Xuzhou magistrate robs
Judge Bao
please let me go after them
Xuzhou and Guizhou
are not our jurisdiction
Judge, we can't interfere
I knew you'd say that
I'll go arrest them now
and bring them here
and make this our case
Don't
Why not?
The Xuzhou magistrate. Coward
Silence
You can stop now
Judge Bao is really busy
I've known him as a child
of course I can see him
What's up?
Judge Bao, I've known you long enough
you must help me
He's the one you want
Judge Bao, I've known you long enough
you must help me
Judge Bao, I've known you long enough
you must help me
Grandma Heung, tell me your grievance
I need rhino skin
for my husband's skin disease
This rhino skin is too tough
Can I borrow
Inspector Zhan's sword to help me cut it?
That's Zhan over there
Inspector Zhan
may I borrow your famous sword
Judge Bao
You're joking?
Grandma Heung, but his sword is for...
Judge Bao will not
let my husband itching for life
Inspector Zhan
Judge Bao
Since this is the only case
in the district
What do you say?
OK
Weng, Ma
Here
I know I owe you
Ten years
I know
Blackie
I said I know
Blackie, ten long years
We've put away many criminals
Everyone knows
our great names
What have we done the last few years?
Nothing
We've turned into garbage
Useless
We are not garbage
This city is like the dipper
We're the water in it
One drop less will make a huge
difference
Doesn't it feel warmer in a tub?
OK. Sit down
Sit down
Good
Do I have a choice?
No choice
Just like you must use soap
when you wash
Just let it go
Alright
Why don't you take a vacation
and go see some friends
When you've had enough fun
come back to the dipper
Good idea
Wait for me
Hurry back. Yes, sir
I haven't shown my face
for ten years now
They'll be shocked to see me
I, Chang the Flying Spider
paid a surprise visit
to the Judge's court alone
Guess whom I bummed into?
It is Bao's top man
Zhan
We fought for
300 rounds
Bullshit
Why didn't the other guards come?
Listen
It was before dusk
We fought on the street. Shop, roof
so no one saw us
We had fireworks that night
at the magistrate court
There are people everywhere
How come
no one heard a thing?
Who are you?
Never seen your face before
Where are you come from?
What's your name?
Why are you here?
Call me Pedestrian A
Pedestrian A? Go away
You don't know whom you're talking to
I'm not bluffing. It's true
He is lying
Chang, stop lying
I
300 rounds?
You creamed Zhan
in less than 100 rounds
I saw it clearly that night
Brother Bai saw everything
I have a solid witness
Great, huh?
Go away kid
Today's the Martial Arts Forum
let's not talk about that old-timer Zhao
Waiter. Yes sir
Tonight's my treat. Everyone must drink
Great
Cheers
This Bai from Cave Island
He's one of the best
One of the best
Grandpa. Grandpa
Good
Grandpa
You still have to pay me back
I've already repaid you
Do you know who I am?
I'm the son of Imperial Councilor Pang
Who dared to hit me?
Great leg work
Of course
If you don't want your leg
like this forever
I'll repay the $50 he owes
You've got $50, you've got women
Yi Hong Night Club is on sale
Sure
Good
I figure Bai will go to
the Imperial Councilor's house
this evening
I thought I was the smart one
What's wrong with this world?
Give me a skewer
Sugar beetlenut
Sugar beetlenut
Are you new in town?
What do you want?
Keep your voice down
Look below
Raise your foot. Can you see it?
Can you see it or not?
See what?
That leaf is my reservation
Go away
Stupid
How much did you spend this month?
Dad. I didn't spend a lot
Dad. I'm a loan shark
I've earned $50 today
Idiot
I've earned at least $10,000
on every loan
And you're satisfied at $50?
If you want to be evil
you have to do it right
Dad. You're a genius
Satisfied at $50?
Where's the quotation?
Got it right here
Look
Dad
Judge Bao's head is only worth $300?
Idiot. Come here
Come here. Why did you hit me?
Look
Weng, Ma, Zhang and Zhao tallied
to $8000
Zhan alone is another $100,000
With Zhan out of the way
Bao is mine
Don't you get it?
Dad, I never learned to read
I can't read, you know that
You're such a disgrace
Why hit me again?
East Wing is on fire
Fire's escalating
Coming to the West Wing
It's gonna burn the concubines
Where's the 72nd concubine?
Dad. Wait for me
I want to get my 42nd
and 36th
So quick?
You again
Dad. Not again
Bai
Over here
Bai, his money is all here
You know about the Hebei Drought
I'll make sure it gets there tomorrow
So long
Pedestrian A
Good partner
Always
It is freezing, why does he want a fan?
To block the wind
Nothing is what it seems, right?
Right
Eunuch Kuo, is His Majesty up yet?
Say no more
His Majesty will see no one today
Judge Bao needs to see His Majesty
Go home
Stop
Judge Bao, why don't we...
No
I'm the Head Eunuch
do you really want to hit me?
Yes, I do
Inspector Zhan
Don't, please
Judge Bao
Your Royal Highness
It's been a long time
Please accept my bow
Please, I'm too honored
You definitely deserve it
Without you, there will be no justice
in this country
Mr. Gongsun. Inspector Zhan
Your Royal Highness
Bao, have you met my adopted sister
Yue Hua?
Ms. Yue Hua, an honor
The honor is all mine
I've heard from Eunuch Chen
that you'll be blocked today
I'm here to unblock it
Thanks, Your Highness
Greetings to the Royal Highness
Save it
Eunuch Guo
Where's His Majesty?
Inside
Judge Bao, please
Your Royal Highness
His Majesty
will not see any visitors today
Are you minding my business?
As the Empress-appointed Head Eunuch
I've got to intervene
I'll have your head now
even the Empress can't save you
Judge Bao, the same old dirty trick
Your Majesty
Long live Your Majesty
Long live Your Majesty
Long live Your Majesty
You may rise
Thank you. Thank you
Stupid Chen
His Majesty is listening to the music
How dare you bring these intruders?
How ridiculous
Are you trying to cause trouble?
This is not trouble
I'll take the blame
Judge Bao has urgent matters
to report to His Majesty
That's why it's here
Please forgive me
Bullshit
If Bao says it's urgent, it's urgent
Don't worry
Thank you, Your Majesty
Judge Bao, what is the matter?
Your Majesty
Inspector Zhan overheard that
Councilor Pang is scheming
to assassinate me
Your Majesty
As a loyal servant
and father of the Empress
how can this be possible?
Inspector Zhan has got
a target quotation
How dare you
If I attempt such devious acts
I'm guilty as charged
As the Economics Councilor
it's imminent that
I know all the existing rates
The quotation is for my reference
Of course. A quotation means nothing
My name is not here
That's a serious crime
Judge Bao, are you trying
to frame my father?
Everyone just calm down
Let me show you my l-ching plate
it can reveal the past and future
Bao and brother, come with me
Stir it up
Judge Bao, help me
You stir it
Help you with what? Your Majesty
How? Stop stirring up this mess
You're no match for the Empress
But they really want to assassinate me
Pang is my father-in-law
I'm the one who will suffer
You see her once every few months
but I'm stuck with her every night
Come stir it too
Slowly
You wanna stir me up for good?
If Pang wants you dead
you better be really careful
I've stirred up this verdict
Last night, Inspector Zhan searched
Imperial Councilor's house
he discovered the quotation
But as a good citizen, he returned this
to the appropriate owner
Good job
Learn from Zhan, return all found items
to their rightful owners
Resume the music
I'm bored with music
Zhan is an excellent swordsman
Why doesn't he demonstrate it for us?
Your Majesty
May I sing instead?
Who wants to hear you sing?
My Empress, I'll dance for you instead
Allow me
I want to watch Zhan
Bao
Say something
So Zhan is nothing but a clown
Who hit me?
Impressive
Let me see how I should reward you
You're promoted to Imperial Cat
Imperial Sword Guard, 4th Class
Thank you, Your Majesty
You don't like it?
Why aren't you smiling?
Gongsun, I think I'm hurt
His Majesty is here
Long live His Majesty
Take me to this famous
Yi Hong Night Club
We're all here
why don't we go tonight?
Should I ask the imperial doctor to come?
He likes to go clubbing too?
Hurry, go and get him
Night clubs are HIV-infested
I just want to be cautious
You always spoil the fun
Let's go
Move aside
I've devised a plan to eradicate Pang
Who would guess
we're plotting in a night club?
This is the perfect cover-up
You think I really want to go?
How painful this must be for you
Your Majesty
You too
Cheers
Let's go after this drink
Your Majesty
I've shut down Yi Hong Club
three months ago
Don't they have any branches?
My incompetent hands have
dimmed my great sword
Can you smell anything special?
Smell it yet?
I can hear the sword's mourning that
it's not serving its purpose
How can this sword be able to
compare with your legendary
Swift sword?
It's no more than a broken sword
Sword has a gentle appearance
but it's light as the wind
Truly a gentleman's weapon
Now I have the pleasure
to meet the true sword of ladies
If you like it, please have it
Really?
Of course not
Zhan, as my gift to you
choose any sword here
But definitely not Yue Hua's
Sorry
This is not like you
You're always so generous
Your Majesty
This sword
is Yue Hua's dowry
It is meant
for Yue Hua and her future husband
If not
Just like this. Take this
The whore and her pimp
Your Majesty
Freudian slip
It's fair lady and her prince
Inspector Zhan
take my advice, choose one from these
Brother, I think Swift Sword
has found its rightful master
If Zhan will exchange his sword
it won't matter if it's the dowry
Yue Hua, how generous of you
Inspector Zhan
you're a man, accept with grace
If this is His Majesty's order
Inspector Zhan
Thank you, Ms. Yue Hua
Oh no. The Imperial Cat is here
Those rats at Cave Island are doomed
Fatso, fiddling with that thing so early?
I've dubbed this the ''Morning Glory''
a.k.a. ''Lethal Weapon''
My latest invention
Look how thick the cannon is
When I fire this
all the targets will be blown away
That Imperial Cat will become shreds
With this, we'll definitely get Zhan
Sure. He's as good as dead
Not again. Who are you to say anything?
What have you ever done?
What's going on?
Marvelous!
Who?
We'll go find Zhan Zhao
Looking for Zhan? We'll die
Wait. Let me do it
The Imperial Cat
What kind of title is that?
What did Zhan do to deserve it?
Agree
Go to the Emperor to file your complaint
The Emperor?
He'll kill us
Zhan is the root of all problems
He is in trouble this time
Let's go
Should we go together?
Come on
Want to die?
I don't want to die. Not yet
Cheers
So soon?
Let's get our weapons
What a piece
Smells great
We'll fulfill our end of the bargain
We'll leave in an hour
What's up?
I've got to fetch some anesthesia
to knock him out
Good idea. Go get it
I've left it with little sister
I'll get it from her
Told you not to leave things with her
What to do now?
Did you drink it?
Yes
Stop thinking about your country
Think about me
Come on
Careful
Told you
You
Yue Hua
me
His Royal Highness
and His Majesty against Councilor Pang
A brilliant plan
That's my old friend
You'll have to make some sacrifices
Judge Bao, save me
Judge Bao
Eunuch Chen is in trouble
Slow down and tell me
I've heard that Eunuch Guo
will assassinate Eunuch Chen tonight
I escaped in time
But it's hard to say
if Eunuch Chen will survive the night
What did he say?
He said Eunuch Chen is in trouble
Assassins
Watch out
Who do they think they are
A letter?
Please lend me the three treasures
Shining Mouse
Three treasures are in danger
Zhang, go check it out
Don't go
The three treasures are still here
The three treasures are still here
Judge Bao, please forgive me
Not your fault
Shining Mouse is just too cunning
Shining Mouse wouldn't have discovered
the three treasures
if it weren't for Gongsun
It's the oldest trick in the world
This Shining Mouse
I've met Shining Mouse
Let me get the three treasures back
Let's catch this mouse
and we'll rendez-vous at the palace
Got it
Bai
Pedestrian A?
You came at the right time
Really?
I have something to show you
Stole them from the Judge's court
I'm Inspector Zhan from the court
You're the Imperial Cat
Sorry that I've lied to you
You're under arrest
Don't fight
Come and get the treasures
if you can
You are not my league
Forget it
What are you doing?
That's cheating
Cheating?
I didn't even draw my sword
Retaliate
See you later
Still waiting?
I'll wait for the assassin here
If they do anything to Eunuch Chen
we'll catch him red-handed
Tackle the problem at its roots
let me go and kill Eunuch Guo
No
Assassin
Who killed Eunuch Guo?
Don't look at me. I was here with you all
Before that?
What are you mumbling about?
Don't let His Majesty find out
Who's talking about me?
Stop mimicking His Majesty
Long live Your Majesty
Bao, what's this place?
This is my neighborhood
You think you can keep a secret from me?
You take me for a fool?
Rise
Thank you, Your Majesty
Your Majesty. I do think
murder investigation is always my duty
If Your Majesty finds out
you may solve this before I do
then what'd that leave me?
You flatter well
Your diplomacy
has improved immensely
Bao has become a much better politician
Come, I've got to show you something
What a hypocrite
Look
We've got to snatch
Shining Mouse
What's so special?
Good presentation
You don't say
What a Shining Mouse
He must be so incredible to write
these words on such a high wall
If only he'll help us
to get Councilor Pang
I order you to capture Shining Mouse
within 20 days
Your Majesty, twenty days?
Sorry. I meant ten days
Sorry. I meant ten days
Inspector Zhan
You're the only one who met
Shining Mouse
Make good use of these ten days
In the meantime, only you've met
Shining Mouse
would you like to do a sketch of him?
Sure
A corrupt official for sure. No doubt
Look. These eyes
Look how they glow
Look at his brows
It's the perfect color. Perfect shape
That's what I call perfect
And the nose
Look how straight it is. Perfect shape
I like the lips best
Cherry-shape mouth
That's a feminine man
That's our little sister
Really, it's our sister. Wow. Yes
What to do?
Let me hold this. Let me do this
I love the sound of this
Are you joking?
How can you do this here?
Sister is here
Hey
What a treat to be here
Let's make this a memorable visit
Tonight we'll
start with the East End
What'll we do?
Like this
East End, freeze
OK
Louder. One more time
No. I want a bit more quiet
East End, freeze
Up
Up
Hurry
Hurry
What a sister
It's bloody cold and she's not coming
She's cheating us
Just write something and go
It's so damn cold
OK, this is the last stroke
Done
With your calligraphy
who're you trying to scare?
Give me
What's your plan?
Look. This is more ferocious
Agree
That's better
What are you doing?
You should write, ''Zhan Zhao eats shit''
Give me
OK, you do it
How do you write ''Zhan Zhao''?
I'll show you
He knows. Ask him. Sure
Hey. It's just the two of them
Don't hit my head
I don't believe this
You guys should be punished
for trespassing
in the Judge's Court at night
Guillotine
Judge Bao, not the death sentence
What about that Bai intruding my court
what kind of punishment
should I give him?
Wait a second, my brother
He stole my sword
Zhan gave it to me
I did not. I did not
Bai would not do that?
You see
Judge Bao, you see
Lend me your sword
If you want it back
Inspector Zhan should come to
Cave Island alone
Shining Mouse
Inspector Zhan. Yes
Will you go?
With pleasure
Judge Bao
I want to go too
This will be a dangerous journey
Judge Bao
You shouldn't be fooled by her looks
she is very smart indeed
Inspector Zhan, take her with you
Watch out. This place is full of traps
I've set it all up
Really?
Thanks
No need to thank us
You've helped us too
Our little brother is into poisons
these days
Let's take some antidote first
or else we would all be like you last time
Teasing me? Yes
What's going on?
Really cool here
Ms. Yue Hua
I've told you not to eat everything
that people offer
It's good that I'm here
Don't be afraid
Bai is a true gentleman
He won't touch my woman
I'll do it
I'll slash her pretty face now
Sir
Sir what? Get in line
Bing from Honor Court to see Mr. Bai
I told you to line up
I have my master's order
to invite Mr. Bai to join Honor Court
I've brought $500,000
as a token of our sincerity
Told you to line up
Also this virgin here
She's not bad
Who's your master?
I can't say
Master says
he really admires
your recent ''masterpiece'' in the East End
If you'll join Honor Court
to eradicate Bao
you'll be handsomely rewarded
Treason?
I only want to get
the Imperial Cat right now
I'll speak to you tomorrow
Mr. Bai
One more word and
I'll chop off your head
What about me?
What's going to happen to me?
Let me... Sit down
You still have your limbs
The exit is that way
Do you want me to show you the way out?
What are you laughing at?
Zhan thinks highly of you
He thinks you are a good man
If you change your ways now
your future is bright
Honor Court
is openly challenging His Majesty
Bai
pick up your sword
and join us
Worry about yourself first
You still have 3 more days
to deliver me to the Emperor
I will convince you
in three days
Go to bed
What should we do?
He's a good man
Give him some time
I know him
Fatso. What are you doing?
Nothing. Look at this fat pigeon
If it can fly, maybe I can too
Why do you say that?
If the mouse can love the cat
why can't I fly?
Sure?
Very sure
That sure?
How do I know?
Zhan
Are you ok?
Here's your sword
I'm coming with you
Thank you
Your Majesty
We've all Five Mice here
Bring them to me
Bring the Five Mice
Five Mice of Cave Island
to see Your Majesty
Who is Shining Mouse?
I'm Shining Mouse, Your Majesty
Five Mice. To reward your loyalty
I make Bai Imperial Sword Guard
4th Class
The rest of you will be Trainers
of the Imperial Army
Rise
Thank you, Your Majesty
Inspector Zhan
Yes, Your Majesty
Your achievement deserves a 2nd Class
Thank you
Ms. Yue Hua
You've also done your part
is there anything you want?
You two have been engaged
long enough
You two exchange
your swords as love gifts
I think we should not postpone
the wedding anymore
Inspector Zhan, you would not refuse?
No
Then the wedding will be
on the First of the coming Lunar Year
Brother, you're in charge of this
With pleasure
Thank you, Your Majesty
Court is recessed
Bai, you're a girl?
How come I couldn't tell
That day at the restaurant
Ms. Yue Hua, congratulations
Congratulations
Congratulations. Thanks
You're welcome
Can I ask you a question?
Sure
What is the first thing you do
when you wake up every morning?
Reflect on the mistakes
I've made the previous day
Wrong
Wrong?
Start the court proceedings?
No
What'd I do?
Open your eyes
Inspector Zhan
I've finally found someone
who's more ridiculous than me
Judge Bao, you have to see this
Judge Bao. Look
Look. What's this?
Good luck and good fortune
Since we're having fun, let me
demonstrate my calligraphy to you guys
Ms. Bai taught me a new trick
Isn't this fantastic?
Definitely
Really?
Sure
Is it cold?
Freezing
I've made you soup
Come and drink it
Sure. I'll go inside soon
You see, what a shame
Women shouldn't have physical contacts
with men
Kitty, good morning
Kitty?
I out-rank you
Leader of the pack, good morning
What are you up to?
Disguising as a man again
Bai is so much fun and articulate
But a bit strange
I have such fun with her
I can see
I feel sorry for her future husband
behaving improperly all the time
Whoever marries her
Yue Hua, now that's a lady, right?
Sure. Sure
She's from a good family
and with good upbringing
Agree
A chicken egg is an egg
A duck egg is an egg
You can choose
This theory again?
It works, right?
No
Sounds reasonable to me?
No
Help me. Choose for me
I'm only good at solving cases
I'm no good when it comes to women
If you call off the wedding now
you may offend His Majesty
I understand that
But to have fun
An egg is an egg. Hey
You're not allowed to see each other
until the wedding day
If you two got anything to say
just say it now
Judge Bao, please
Remember the past
forget all quarrels
I miss the times we're together
I'm unable to slow down
will I ever forget him?
Will I ever forget him?
This one is really good
Who are you talking about?
Zhan, are we brothers?
Yes
Can I ask you a question?
Sure
Do you love me?
If I say I don't, would you believe me?
Don't sidetrack
And you? If I ask
I do
I'll never lie to you
Thank you for your love
What's that sentence?
I'm useless
Not only I failed to invite Bai
but let him chased us in return
It's not your fault
I misjudged Bai
Let it be for now
But
if Zhan has found out about Honor Court
we will be doomed
In order to smoothen everything
we've got to kill him
Honor Court's fighters
will overthrow the useless Emperor
and restore harmony to the land
Honor Court's fighters
will overthrow the useless Emperor
and restore harmony to the land
Where's Ms. Bai?
Ms. Bai?
I don't think she can make it
Let's go. Go
Yes sir
Let's go. Let's go
Do you think Sister will
I do. What'll she do?
Whatever women do
when they are rejected
She's lost the guy, not her cherry
Hard to say
Take care
Bingo. One dot
Red Dragon
Bingo. Bingo
Three at a go
A Trio Flush too
Trios
How come you've all got flushes
but I have nothing?
Forget it
It's just a one-time thing
There is always hope
Don't be sad
If you can't be the wife
settle for the concubine
Yes, you can still be his concubine
Right
Where is your dignity?
I love him is my own business
He doesn't love me
is also my own business
Being a concubine?
I can't share him with others
Chang the Flying Spider
Why didn't you use the front door?
Don't you know there are
two guards at the front?
You know
I'm not used to the front door
Who knows it's so slippery here?
Goodbye
No, I've come to report
Prince Xiangyang
wants to kill everyone
at the wedding feast tonight
Are you kidding?
I am serious
He's already pre-ordered
the imperial robe
And I know that Mona
No, that Honor Court
That's the basement at his house
Also
there are maps already
Ms. Bai
Judge Bao, don't attend the wedding
It's Prince Xiangyang's trap
He's using his sister's wedding
and he'll kill everyone tonight
He's pre-ordered an imperial robe
Brilliant plan
How detailed. Yes
I told you not to exaggerate
What if it comes back to haunt us?
Ms. Bai
Ms. Bai. We've settled this, right?
Even you don't believe me?
I thank you for your love
Mr. Gongsun
Brother Bai
Why are you here?
Why are you wandering around?
How come the map
has written instructions?
Certainly, I'm sophisticated
I can only write
but can't draw
Why can't we find our way?
Coz you're reading it the wrong way
Let me show you
First, walk 30 steps to your left
Then, turn right for another 30 steps
Left, right
Yes
This is left
Then this is right, of course
You know that, right?
No problem. Let's go
Brother Bai
What's up?
Not like this
Like that
1, 2
3, 4
5, 6
7, 8
Bai, do you want to go in alone?
Together. You and me
Wait a minute. I thought you'd
recruit at least a few hundred men
This place is full of traps
and full of guards
No one has ever escaped
You've been there before? No
How do you know then?
I heard
Cheers everyone
Cheers
Your Majesty
Judge Bao, you'll have to
bottoms up all the way
I can get drunk
but he can't
Yes, Your Majesty
I haven't slept for three days
investigating this Honor Court
I can't work if I get drunk
I remember that
You've been investigating
the Honor Court for a long time
Any news so far?
What should I punish you?
I deserve the death sentence
for my inefficiencies
Not the death sentence
There's a saying
the blind leads the blind
Bao, I'm not surprised you have no leads
Your joke is not funny
I'm not joking
Look what you've done to the empire
How can I laugh in this moment?
Brother
It's poison
Your Majesty. Your Majesty
Zhan
Protect His Majesty
Take them out to the guillotine
Brother, stop
His Majesty has been kind to us
You can't do this
Shut up
Kill me first if you want to kill the others
Alright
Killing hundreds
can save the whole world
If you want to die first, I'll help you
Brother
Ms. Yue Hua
Thank you
Brother, we're of the same parents
Why do you hate me so much?
No need to pretend any more
You didn't take our antidote first
That's why you're feeling so sick
Our antidote can neutralize all poisons
If you use it as face cream
it even prevents wrinkles
Antidote can prevent poisons
and wrinkles
Where can I buy some?
Everywhere, only you can't have any
Treason is the worst crime
You have to suffer death sentence
for the entire family
Brother, do you feel guilty?
I underestimated you, Bao
Come people
Protect the Emperor
Protect the Emperor
Hurry
Zhan, your sword
Protect the Emperor.
What's up, Your Majesty?
Where's Zhan?
Watch out, Your Majesty
Judge Bao
I deserve to die
Protect the Emperor
Fatso
Where are you?
Judge Bao
there are so many people below
can Zhan really fight them all?
You're sure he doesn't need any help?
No problem. Look
Sharp shooter, get that emperor
Zhan
Miss has gone to get the list
Zhan
Hurry
Thanks
Useless
The Fortune God is here
It's not the New Year yet
It's the code
Why didn't you write it on the map?
Codes should be memorized
Where's he?
Traps everywhere
You think I was joking?
Watch out
Bai, be careful
Can you come out?
Get out of here
Come on
Please
No
Ms. Bai
No
Don't try it. Get out of here
The list is here
Don't you believe me?
Get out. Hurry
I believed you
Are you OK?
Why are you still here?
You think I want to stay?
How can I leave. Emperor?
It's here
It's here
Good, open the door
I can't. Judge Bao
He needs the code
I said Kung Hei Fat Choy
Happy New Year
But he won't open
OK
I know a popular code
from the Westerners
Let me try
Open Sesame
Doesn't work
Why don't we blow it up?
Good plan
OK
Wrong code
you've got to answer the question
to get in
OK. Shoot
How many words in ''the dictionary''?
Two
How come no one got wet when
five people are sharing an umbrella?
It's not raining
Looks like we'll live happily ever after
Watch where you put your hand
What's wrong?
Can't you be gentle?
Like this?
No need to be scared
I'm not scared
Why wouldn't the cow plow the fields?
It's a milk cow
Why didn't the fall hurt?
It's a waterfall
What kind of melon doesn't grow
on land?
A watermelon
Which kind of door never opens?
Outdoor
If no one turns up
what kind of meeting can they have?
Answer me
Postponed meeting
Take him
Don't move
Take him
I'm hiding well. How to tke me?
You take the upper body
I take the lower
I found the name list
What have you got to say?
There will be no rebels
if His Majesty serves his people
This name list is really good
Hundreds of officials have come together
We've got no choice
Your Majesty
I thought laissez-faire
would be good
to my people
I can't imagine it will turn you against me
Brother
I want you to help me rule the lands
Brother
I'll spare your life
Your Majesty, you can't let him off
Really. Your Majesty
You're the worst. Shut up
I know you've gathered
$179,504,000.00
All come from corruption
I am too generous not killing you
and your company
Otherwise, all of these wouldn't happen
If I'm not forgiving, I'll execute you first
Why are you coughing?
Where's my allowance
that you've been secretly
keeping from me?
Don't you know it's our people's money?
You have no right to do that
Judge Bao. Yes
Do you think I am too lenient?
Your Majesty is truly forgiving
it's for the best
Rise
I have my faults
From now on
tell me if I make a mistake
Also
I'll spare no corrupt officials
from now on
Stop corruption. Good
Your Majesty
Please take my life
Sister
Shining Mouse has been killed
in the basement
There is no Shining mouse from now on
so I can walk the earth anew
You are free to go
I'll not retain you anymore
Thank you
We've been through a lot
Tell me what's on your mind
Don't sulk, I'll order a good banquet and
we'll have some fun
You're the best
We're brothers
Even if they all abandon you
I'll be by you side
What if I give you one more chance?
I'm Inspector Zhan from Judge's Court
Brothers always
Your Majesty, I've something to report
Your Majesty, Yue Hua has a request
There are so many guys in the world
but Zhan is really unique
He's too fussy at his age
I am afraid I can't stand Zhan anymore
Actually, I can't stand him right now
So, Your Majesty, please allow me
to cancel the wedding
Thank you for your love
I choose you
Don't you have something to say to me?
None
What a special way to start the new year
especially when a mouse loves a cat
there lived a famous Judge
Bao Qing Tian
He's got an elite team
featuring legendary Zhan Zhao
Bao has the license to kill
He's renowned for
his dedication and fairness
These are peaceful times
Today is November 7th
A bad day
I can't pull out my sword
Zhan, hurry up. We've got work to do
Zhan, drink your soya milk
before Zhang Long drinks yours too
If you didn't eat my cruller
I wouldn't be drinking soya milk
You don't think he's gone mad?
Damn. What's wrong with it?
Leave it
Judge will be mad if we don't go now
Are you talking about me?
Judge Bao
We're just talking about Zhan
Inspector Zhan
let the proceedings begin
Judge Bao speaks
It is our duty
to relieve His Majesty's burdens
Please
As imperial officials
citizens are our own children
Let's proceed
Justice Bao rules the district court
Justice prevails under Iron Face
Brave men come to promote his cost
Wang and Ma are at his side
Flying Mouse is light as wind
Striding Mouse is a good chap
Drilling Mouse has fists of steel
Diving Mouse fights with might
Court
Judge Bao, two hours have passed
Boring
Not bad
There had not been a case
for three months
It's a blessing
Gongsun, what's to bless?
The Guizhou magistrate rapes
The Xuzhou magistrate robs
Judge Bao
please let me go after them
Xuzhou and Guizhou
are not our jurisdiction
Judge, we can't interfere
I knew you'd say that
I'll go arrest them now
and bring them here
and make this our case
Don't
Why not?
The Xuzhou magistrate. Coward
Silence
You can stop now
Judge Bao is really busy
I've known him as a child
of course I can see him
What's up?
Judge Bao, I've known you long enough
you must help me
He's the one you want
Judge Bao, I've known you long enough
you must help me
Judge Bao, I've known you long enough
you must help me
Grandma Heung, tell me your grievance
I need rhino skin
for my husband's skin disease
This rhino skin is too tough
Can I borrow
Inspector Zhan's sword to help me cut it?
That's Zhan over there
Inspector Zhan
may I borrow your famous sword
Judge Bao
You're joking?
Grandma Heung, but his sword is for...
Judge Bao will not
let my husband itching for life
Inspector Zhan
Judge Bao
Since this is the only case
in the district
What do you say?
OK
Weng, Ma
Here
I know I owe you
Ten years
I know
Blackie
I said I know
Blackie, ten long years
We've put away many criminals
Everyone knows
our great names
What have we done the last few years?
Nothing
We've turned into garbage
Useless
We are not garbage
This city is like the dipper
We're the water in it
One drop less will make a huge
difference
Doesn't it feel warmer in a tub?
OK. Sit down
Sit down
Good
Do I have a choice?
No choice
Just like you must use soap
when you wash
Just let it go
Alright
Why don't you take a vacation
and go see some friends
When you've had enough fun
come back to the dipper
Good idea
Wait for me
Hurry back. Yes, sir
I haven't shown my face
for ten years now
They'll be shocked to see me
I, Chang the Flying Spider
paid a surprise visit
to the Judge's court alone
Guess whom I bummed into?
It is Bao's top man
Zhan
We fought for
300 rounds
Bullshit
Why didn't the other guards come?
Listen
It was before dusk
We fought on the street. Shop, roof
so no one saw us
We had fireworks that night
at the magistrate court
There are people everywhere
How come
no one heard a thing?
Who are you?
Never seen your face before
Where are you come from?
What's your name?
Why are you here?
Call me Pedestrian A
Pedestrian A? Go away
You don't know whom you're talking to
I'm not bluffing. It's true
He is lying
Chang, stop lying
I
300 rounds?
You creamed Zhan
in less than 100 rounds
I saw it clearly that night
Brother Bai saw everything
I have a solid witness
Great, huh?
Go away kid
Today's the Martial Arts Forum
let's not talk about that old-timer Zhao
Waiter. Yes sir
Tonight's my treat. Everyone must drink
Great
Cheers
This Bai from Cave Island
He's one of the best
One of the best
Grandpa. Grandpa
Good
Grandpa
You still have to pay me back
I've already repaid you
Do you know who I am?
I'm the son of Imperial Councilor Pang
Who dared to hit me?
Great leg work
Of course
If you don't want your leg
like this forever
I'll repay the $50 he owes
You've got $50, you've got women
Yi Hong Night Club is on sale
Sure
Good
I figure Bai will go to
the Imperial Councilor's house
this evening
I thought I was the smart one
What's wrong with this world?
Give me a skewer
Sugar beetlenut
Sugar beetlenut
Are you new in town?
What do you want?
Keep your voice down
Look below
Raise your foot. Can you see it?
Can you see it or not?
See what?
That leaf is my reservation
Go away
Stupid
How much did you spend this month?
Dad. I didn't spend a lot
Dad. I'm a loan shark
I've earned $50 today
Idiot
I've earned at least $10,000
on every loan
And you're satisfied at $50?
If you want to be evil
you have to do it right
Dad. You're a genius
Satisfied at $50?
Where's the quotation?
Got it right here
Look
Dad
Judge Bao's head is only worth $300?
Idiot. Come here
Come here. Why did you hit me?
Look
Weng, Ma, Zhang and Zhao tallied
to $8000
Zhan alone is another $100,000
With Zhan out of the way
Bao is mine
Don't you get it?
Dad, I never learned to read
I can't read, you know that
You're such a disgrace
Why hit me again?
East Wing is on fire
Fire's escalating
Coming to the West Wing
It's gonna burn the concubines
Where's the 72nd concubine?
Dad. Wait for me
I want to get my 42nd
and 36th
So quick?
You again
Dad. Not again
Bai
Over here
Bai, his money is all here
You know about the Hebei Drought
I'll make sure it gets there tomorrow
So long
Pedestrian A
Good partner
Always
It is freezing, why does he want a fan?
To block the wind
Nothing is what it seems, right?
Right
Eunuch Kuo, is His Majesty up yet?
Say no more
His Majesty will see no one today
Judge Bao needs to see His Majesty
Go home
Stop
Judge Bao, why don't we...
No
I'm the Head Eunuch
do you really want to hit me?
Yes, I do
Inspector Zhan
Don't, please
Judge Bao
Your Royal Highness
It's been a long time
Please accept my bow
Please, I'm too honored
You definitely deserve it
Without you, there will be no justice
in this country
Mr. Gongsun. Inspector Zhan
Your Royal Highness
Bao, have you met my adopted sister
Yue Hua?
Ms. Yue Hua, an honor
The honor is all mine
I've heard from Eunuch Chen
that you'll be blocked today
I'm here to unblock it
Thanks, Your Highness
Greetings to the Royal Highness
Save it
Eunuch Guo
Where's His Majesty?
Inside
Judge Bao, please
Your Royal Highness
His Majesty
will not see any visitors today
Are you minding my business?
As the Empress-appointed Head Eunuch
I've got to intervene
I'll have your head now
even the Empress can't save you
Judge Bao, the same old dirty trick
Your Majesty
Long live Your Majesty
Long live Your Majesty
Long live Your Majesty
You may rise
Thank you. Thank you
Stupid Chen
His Majesty is listening to the music
How dare you bring these intruders?
How ridiculous
Are you trying to cause trouble?
This is not trouble
I'll take the blame
Judge Bao has urgent matters
to report to His Majesty
That's why it's here
Please forgive me
Bullshit
If Bao says it's urgent, it's urgent
Don't worry
Thank you, Your Majesty
Judge Bao, what is the matter?
Your Majesty
Inspector Zhan overheard that
Councilor Pang is scheming
to assassinate me
Your Majesty
As a loyal servant
and father of the Empress
how can this be possible?
Inspector Zhan has got
a target quotation
How dare you
If I attempt such devious acts
I'm guilty as charged
As the Economics Councilor
it's imminent that
I know all the existing rates
The quotation is for my reference
Of course. A quotation means nothing
My name is not here
That's a serious crime
Judge Bao, are you trying
to frame my father?
Everyone just calm down
Let me show you my l-ching plate
it can reveal the past and future
Bao and brother, come with me
Stir it up
Judge Bao, help me
You stir it
Help you with what? Your Majesty
How? Stop stirring up this mess
You're no match for the Empress
But they really want to assassinate me
Pang is my father-in-law
I'm the one who will suffer
You see her once every few months
but I'm stuck with her every night
Come stir it too
Slowly
You wanna stir me up for good?
If Pang wants you dead
you better be really careful
I've stirred up this verdict
Last night, Inspector Zhan searched
Imperial Councilor's house
he discovered the quotation
But as a good citizen, he returned this
to the appropriate owner
Good job
Learn from Zhan, return all found items
to their rightful owners
Resume the music
I'm bored with music
Zhan is an excellent swordsman
Why doesn't he demonstrate it for us?
Your Majesty
May I sing instead?
Who wants to hear you sing?
My Empress, I'll dance for you instead
Allow me
I want to watch Zhan
Bao
Say something
So Zhan is nothing but a clown
Who hit me?
Impressive
Let me see how I should reward you
You're promoted to Imperial Cat
Imperial Sword Guard, 4th Class
Thank you, Your Majesty
You don't like it?
Why aren't you smiling?
Gongsun, I think I'm hurt
His Majesty is here
Long live His Majesty
Take me to this famous
Yi Hong Night Club
We're all here
why don't we go tonight?
Should I ask the imperial doctor to come?
He likes to go clubbing too?
Hurry, go and get him
Night clubs are HIV-infested
I just want to be cautious
You always spoil the fun
Let's go
Move aside
I've devised a plan to eradicate Pang
Who would guess
we're plotting in a night club?
This is the perfect cover-up
You think I really want to go?
How painful this must be for you
Your Majesty
You too
Cheers
Let's go after this drink
Your Majesty
I've shut down Yi Hong Club
three months ago
Don't they have any branches?
My incompetent hands have
dimmed my great sword
Can you smell anything special?
Smell it yet?
I can hear the sword's mourning that
it's not serving its purpose
How can this sword be able to
compare with your legendary
Swift sword?
It's no more than a broken sword
Sword has a gentle appearance
but it's light as the wind
Truly a gentleman's weapon
Now I have the pleasure
to meet the true sword of ladies
If you like it, please have it
Really?
Of course not
Zhan, as my gift to you
choose any sword here
But definitely not Yue Hua's
Sorry
This is not like you
You're always so generous
Your Majesty
This sword
is Yue Hua's dowry
It is meant
for Yue Hua and her future husband
If not
Just like this. Take this
The whore and her pimp
Your Majesty
Freudian slip
It's fair lady and her prince
Inspector Zhan
take my advice, choose one from these
Brother, I think Swift Sword
has found its rightful master
If Zhan will exchange his sword
it won't matter if it's the dowry
Yue Hua, how generous of you
Inspector Zhan
you're a man, accept with grace
If this is His Majesty's order
Inspector Zhan
Thank you, Ms. Yue Hua
Oh no. The Imperial Cat is here
Those rats at Cave Island are doomed
Fatso, fiddling with that thing so early?
I've dubbed this the ''Morning Glory''
a.k.a. ''Lethal Weapon''
My latest invention
Look how thick the cannon is
When I fire this
all the targets will be blown away
That Imperial Cat will become shreds
With this, we'll definitely get Zhan
Sure. He's as good as dead
Not again. Who are you to say anything?
What have you ever done?
What's going on?
Marvelous!
Who?
We'll go find Zhan Zhao
Looking for Zhan? We'll die
Wait. Let me do it
The Imperial Cat
What kind of title is that?
What did Zhan do to deserve it?
Agree
Go to the Emperor to file your complaint
The Emperor?
He'll kill us
Zhan is the root of all problems
He is in trouble this time
Let's go
Should we go together?
Come on
Want to die?
I don't want to die. Not yet
Cheers
So soon?
Let's get our weapons
What a piece
Smells great
We'll fulfill our end of the bargain
We'll leave in an hour
What's up?
I've got to fetch some anesthesia
to knock him out
Good idea. Go get it
I've left it with little sister
I'll get it from her
Told you not to leave things with her
What to do now?
Did you drink it?
Yes
Stop thinking about your country
Think about me
Come on
Careful
Told you
You
Yue Hua
me
His Royal Highness
and His Majesty against Councilor Pang
A brilliant plan
That's my old friend
You'll have to make some sacrifices
Judge Bao, save me
Judge Bao
Eunuch Chen is in trouble
Slow down and tell me
I've heard that Eunuch Guo
will assassinate Eunuch Chen tonight
I escaped in time
But it's hard to say
if Eunuch Chen will survive the night
What did he say?
He said Eunuch Chen is in trouble
Assassins
Watch out
Who do they think they are
A letter?
Please lend me the three treasures
Shining Mouse
Three treasures are in danger
Zhang, go check it out
Don't go
The three treasures are still here
The three treasures are still here
Judge Bao, please forgive me
Not your fault
Shining Mouse is just too cunning
Shining Mouse wouldn't have discovered
the three treasures
if it weren't for Gongsun
It's the oldest trick in the world
This Shining Mouse
I've met Shining Mouse
Let me get the three treasures back
Let's catch this mouse
and we'll rendez-vous at the palace
Got it
Bai
Pedestrian A?
You came at the right time
Really?
I have something to show you
Stole them from the Judge's court
I'm Inspector Zhan from the court
You're the Imperial Cat
Sorry that I've lied to you
You're under arrest
Don't fight
Come and get the treasures
if you can
You are not my league
Forget it
What are you doing?
That's cheating
Cheating?
I didn't even draw my sword
Retaliate
See you later
Still waiting?
I'll wait for the assassin here
If they do anything to Eunuch Chen
we'll catch him red-handed
Tackle the problem at its roots
let me go and kill Eunuch Guo
No
Assassin
Who killed Eunuch Guo?
Don't look at me. I was here with you all
Before that?
What are you mumbling about?
Don't let His Majesty find out
Who's talking about me?
Stop mimicking His Majesty
Long live Your Majesty
Bao, what's this place?
This is my neighborhood
You think you can keep a secret from me?
You take me for a fool?
Rise
Thank you, Your Majesty
Your Majesty. I do think
murder investigation is always my duty
If Your Majesty finds out
you may solve this before I do
then what'd that leave me?
You flatter well
Your diplomacy
has improved immensely
Bao has become a much better politician
Come, I've got to show you something
What a hypocrite
Look
We've got to snatch
Shining Mouse
What's so special?
Good presentation
You don't say
What a Shining Mouse
He must be so incredible to write
these words on such a high wall
If only he'll help us
to get Councilor Pang
I order you to capture Shining Mouse
within 20 days
Your Majesty, twenty days?
Sorry. I meant ten days
Sorry. I meant ten days
Inspector Zhan
You're the only one who met
Shining Mouse
Make good use of these ten days
In the meantime, only you've met
Shining Mouse
would you like to do a sketch of him?
Sure
A corrupt official for sure. No doubt
Look. These eyes
Look how they glow
Look at his brows
It's the perfect color. Perfect shape
That's what I call perfect
And the nose
Look how straight it is. Perfect shape
I like the lips best
Cherry-shape mouth
That's a feminine man
That's our little sister
Really, it's our sister. Wow. Yes
What to do?
Let me hold this. Let me do this
I love the sound of this
Are you joking?
How can you do this here?
Sister is here
Hey
What a treat to be here
Let's make this a memorable visit
Tonight we'll
start with the East End
What'll we do?
Like this
East End, freeze
OK
Louder. One more time
No. I want a bit more quiet
East End, freeze
Up
Up
Hurry
Hurry
What a sister
It's bloody cold and she's not coming
She's cheating us
Just write something and go
It's so damn cold
OK, this is the last stroke
Done
With your calligraphy
who're you trying to scare?
Give me
What's your plan?
Look. This is more ferocious
Agree
That's better
What are you doing?
You should write, ''Zhan Zhao eats shit''
Give me
OK, you do it
How do you write ''Zhan Zhao''?
I'll show you
He knows. Ask him. Sure
Hey. It's just the two of them
Don't hit my head
I don't believe this
You guys should be punished
for trespassing
in the Judge's Court at night
Guillotine
Judge Bao, not the death sentence
What about that Bai intruding my court
what kind of punishment
should I give him?
Wait a second, my brother
He stole my sword
Zhan gave it to me
I did not. I did not
Bai would not do that?
You see
Judge Bao, you see
Lend me your sword
If you want it back
Inspector Zhan should come to
Cave Island alone
Shining Mouse
Inspector Zhan. Yes
Will you go?
With pleasure
Judge Bao
I want to go too
This will be a dangerous journey
Judge Bao
You shouldn't be fooled by her looks
she is very smart indeed
Inspector Zhan, take her with you
Watch out. This place is full of traps
I've set it all up
Really?
Thanks
No need to thank us
You've helped us too
Our little brother is into poisons
these days
Let's take some antidote first
or else we would all be like you last time
Teasing me? Yes
What's going on?
Really cool here
Ms. Yue Hua
I've told you not to eat everything
that people offer
It's good that I'm here
Don't be afraid
Bai is a true gentleman
He won't touch my woman
I'll do it
I'll slash her pretty face now
Sir
Sir what? Get in line
Bing from Honor Court to see Mr. Bai
I told you to line up
I have my master's order
to invite Mr. Bai to join Honor Court
I've brought $500,000
as a token of our sincerity
Told you to line up
Also this virgin here
She's not bad
Who's your master?
I can't say
Master says
he really admires
your recent ''masterpiece'' in the East End
If you'll join Honor Court
to eradicate Bao
you'll be handsomely rewarded
Treason?
I only want to get
the Imperial Cat right now
I'll speak to you tomorrow
Mr. Bai
One more word and
I'll chop off your head
What about me?
What's going to happen to me?
Let me... Sit down
You still have your limbs
The exit is that way
Do you want me to show you the way out?
What are you laughing at?
Zhan thinks highly of you
He thinks you are a good man
If you change your ways now
your future is bright
Honor Court
is openly challenging His Majesty
Bai
pick up your sword
and join us
Worry about yourself first
You still have 3 more days
to deliver me to the Emperor
I will convince you
in three days
Go to bed
What should we do?
He's a good man
Give him some time
I know him
Fatso. What are you doing?
Nothing. Look at this fat pigeon
If it can fly, maybe I can too
Why do you say that?
If the mouse can love the cat
why can't I fly?
Sure?
Very sure
That sure?
How do I know?
Zhan
Are you ok?
Here's your sword
I'm coming with you
Thank you
Your Majesty
We've all Five Mice here
Bring them to me
Bring the Five Mice
Five Mice of Cave Island
to see Your Majesty
Who is Shining Mouse?
I'm Shining Mouse, Your Majesty
Five Mice. To reward your loyalty
I make Bai Imperial Sword Guard
4th Class
The rest of you will be Trainers
of the Imperial Army
Rise
Thank you, Your Majesty
Inspector Zhan
Yes, Your Majesty
Your achievement deserves a 2nd Class
Thank you
Ms. Yue Hua
You've also done your part
is there anything you want?
You two have been engaged
long enough
You two exchange
your swords as love gifts
I think we should not postpone
the wedding anymore
Inspector Zhan, you would not refuse?
No
Then the wedding will be
on the First of the coming Lunar Year
Brother, you're in charge of this
With pleasure
Thank you, Your Majesty
Court is recessed
Bai, you're a girl?
How come I couldn't tell
That day at the restaurant
Ms. Yue Hua, congratulations
Congratulations
Congratulations. Thanks
You're welcome
Can I ask you a question?
Sure
What is the first thing you do
when you wake up every morning?
Reflect on the mistakes
I've made the previous day
Wrong
Wrong?
Start the court proceedings?
No
What'd I do?
Open your eyes
Inspector Zhan
I've finally found someone
who's more ridiculous than me
Judge Bao, you have to see this
Judge Bao. Look
Look. What's this?
Good luck and good fortune
Since we're having fun, let me
demonstrate my calligraphy to you guys
Ms. Bai taught me a new trick
Isn't this fantastic?
Definitely
Really?
Sure
Is it cold?
Freezing
I've made you soup
Come and drink it
Sure. I'll go inside soon
You see, what a shame
Women shouldn't have physical contacts
with men
Kitty, good morning
Kitty?
I out-rank you
Leader of the pack, good morning
What are you up to?
Disguising as a man again
Bai is so much fun and articulate
But a bit strange
I have such fun with her
I can see
I feel sorry for her future husband
behaving improperly all the time
Whoever marries her
Yue Hua, now that's a lady, right?
Sure. Sure
She's from a good family
and with good upbringing
Agree
A chicken egg is an egg
A duck egg is an egg
You can choose
This theory again?
It works, right?
No
Sounds reasonable to me?
No
Help me. Choose for me
I'm only good at solving cases
I'm no good when it comes to women
If you call off the wedding now
you may offend His Majesty
I understand that
But to have fun
An egg is an egg. Hey
You're not allowed to see each other
until the wedding day
If you two got anything to say
just say it now
Judge Bao, please
Remember the past
forget all quarrels
I miss the times we're together
I'm unable to slow down
will I ever forget him?
Will I ever forget him?
This one is really good
Who are you talking about?
Zhan, are we brothers?
Yes
Can I ask you a question?
Sure
Do you love me?
If I say I don't, would you believe me?
Don't sidetrack
And you? If I ask
I do
I'll never lie to you
Thank you for your love
What's that sentence?
I'm useless
Not only I failed to invite Bai
but let him chased us in return
It's not your fault
I misjudged Bai
Let it be for now
But
if Zhan has found out about Honor Court
we will be doomed
In order to smoothen everything
we've got to kill him
Honor Court's fighters
will overthrow the useless Emperor
and restore harmony to the land
Honor Court's fighters
will overthrow the useless Emperor
and restore harmony to the land
Where's Ms. Bai?
Ms. Bai?
I don't think she can make it
Let's go. Go
Yes sir
Let's go. Let's go
Do you think Sister will
I do. What'll she do?
Whatever women do
when they are rejected
She's lost the guy, not her cherry
Hard to say
Take care
Bingo. One dot
Red Dragon
Bingo. Bingo
Three at a go
A Trio Flush too
Trios
How come you've all got flushes
but I have nothing?
Forget it
It's just a one-time thing
There is always hope
Don't be sad
If you can't be the wife
settle for the concubine
Yes, you can still be his concubine
Right
Where is your dignity?
I love him is my own business
He doesn't love me
is also my own business
Being a concubine?
I can't share him with others
Chang the Flying Spider
Why didn't you use the front door?
Don't you know there are
two guards at the front?
You know
I'm not used to the front door
Who knows it's so slippery here?
Goodbye
No, I've come to report
Prince Xiangyang
wants to kill everyone
at the wedding feast tonight
Are you kidding?
I am serious
He's already pre-ordered
the imperial robe
And I know that Mona
No, that Honor Court
That's the basement at his house
Also
there are maps already
Ms. Bai
Judge Bao, don't attend the wedding
It's Prince Xiangyang's trap
He's using his sister's wedding
and he'll kill everyone tonight
He's pre-ordered an imperial robe
Brilliant plan
How detailed. Yes
I told you not to exaggerate
What if it comes back to haunt us?
Ms. Bai
Ms. Bai. We've settled this, right?
Even you don't believe me?
I thank you for your love
Mr. Gongsun
Brother Bai
Why are you here?
Why are you wandering around?
How come the map
has written instructions?
Certainly, I'm sophisticated
I can only write
but can't draw
Why can't we find our way?
Coz you're reading it the wrong way
Let me show you
First, walk 30 steps to your left
Then, turn right for another 30 steps
Left, right
Yes
This is left
Then this is right, of course
You know that, right?
No problem. Let's go
Brother Bai
What's up?
Not like this
Like that
1, 2
3, 4
5, 6
7, 8
Bai, do you want to go in alone?
Together. You and me
Wait a minute. I thought you'd
recruit at least a few hundred men
This place is full of traps
and full of guards
No one has ever escaped
You've been there before? No
How do you know then?
I heard
Cheers everyone
Cheers
Your Majesty
Judge Bao, you'll have to
bottoms up all the way
I can get drunk
but he can't
Yes, Your Majesty
I haven't slept for three days
investigating this Honor Court
I can't work if I get drunk
I remember that
You've been investigating
the Honor Court for a long time
Any news so far?
What should I punish you?
I deserve the death sentence
for my inefficiencies
Not the death sentence
There's a saying
the blind leads the blind
Bao, I'm not surprised you have no leads
Your joke is not funny
I'm not joking
Look what you've done to the empire
How can I laugh in this moment?
Brother
It's poison
Your Majesty. Your Majesty
Zhan
Protect His Majesty
Take them out to the guillotine
Brother, stop
His Majesty has been kind to us
You can't do this
Shut up
Kill me first if you want to kill the others
Alright
Killing hundreds
can save the whole world
If you want to die first, I'll help you
Brother
Ms. Yue Hua
Thank you
Brother, we're of the same parents
Why do you hate me so much?
No need to pretend any more
You didn't take our antidote first
That's why you're feeling so sick
Our antidote can neutralize all poisons
If you use it as face cream
it even prevents wrinkles
Antidote can prevent poisons
and wrinkles
Where can I buy some?
Everywhere, only you can't have any
Treason is the worst crime
You have to suffer death sentence
for the entire family
Brother, do you feel guilty?
I underestimated you, Bao
Come people
Protect the Emperor
Protect the Emperor
Hurry
Zhan, your sword
Protect the Emperor.
What's up, Your Majesty?
Where's Zhan?
Watch out, Your Majesty
Judge Bao
I deserve to die
Protect the Emperor
Fatso
Where are you?
Judge Bao
there are so many people below
can Zhan really fight them all?
You're sure he doesn't need any help?
No problem. Look
Sharp shooter, get that emperor
Zhan
Miss has gone to get the list
Zhan
Hurry
Thanks
Useless
The Fortune God is here
It's not the New Year yet
It's the code
Why didn't you write it on the map?
Codes should be memorized
Where's he?
Traps everywhere
You think I was joking?
Watch out
Bai, be careful
Can you come out?
Get out of here
Come on
Please
No
Ms. Bai
No
Don't try it. Get out of here
The list is here
Don't you believe me?
Get out. Hurry
I believed you
Are you OK?
Why are you still here?
You think I want to stay?
How can I leave. Emperor?
It's here
It's here
Good, open the door
I can't. Judge Bao
He needs the code
I said Kung Hei Fat Choy
Happy New Year
But he won't open
OK
I know a popular code
from the Westerners
Let me try
Open Sesame
Doesn't work
Why don't we blow it up?
Good plan
OK
Wrong code
you've got to answer the question
to get in
OK. Shoot
How many words in ''the dictionary''?
Two
How come no one got wet when
five people are sharing an umbrella?
It's not raining
Looks like we'll live happily ever after
Watch where you put your hand
What's wrong?
Can't you be gentle?
Like this?
No need to be scared
I'm not scared
Why wouldn't the cow plow the fields?
It's a milk cow
Why didn't the fall hurt?
It's a waterfall
What kind of melon doesn't grow
on land?
A watermelon
Which kind of door never opens?
Outdoor
If no one turns up
what kind of meeting can they have?
Answer me
Postponed meeting
Take him
Don't move
Take him
I'm hiding well. How to tke me?
You take the upper body
I take the lower
I found the name list
What have you got to say?
There will be no rebels
if His Majesty serves his people
This name list is really good
Hundreds of officials have come together
We've got no choice
Your Majesty
I thought laissez-faire
would be good
to my people
I can't imagine it will turn you against me
Brother
I want you to help me rule the lands
Brother
I'll spare your life
Your Majesty, you can't let him off
Really. Your Majesty
You're the worst. Shut up
I know you've gathered
$179,504,000.00
All come from corruption
I am too generous not killing you
and your company
Otherwise, all of these wouldn't happen
If I'm not forgiving, I'll execute you first
Why are you coughing?
Where's my allowance
that you've been secretly
keeping from me?
Don't you know it's our people's money?
You have no right to do that
Judge Bao. Yes
Do you think I am too lenient?
Your Majesty is truly forgiving
it's for the best
Rise
I have my faults
From now on
tell me if I make a mistake
Also
I'll spare no corrupt officials
from now on
Stop corruption. Good
Your Majesty
Please take my life
Sister
Shining Mouse has been killed
in the basement
There is no Shining mouse from now on
so I can walk the earth anew
You are free to go
I'll not retain you anymore
Thank you
We've been through a lot
Tell me what's on your mind
Don't sulk, I'll order a good banquet and
we'll have some fun
You're the best
We're brothers
Even if they all abandon you
I'll be by you side
What if I give you one more chance?
I'm Inspector Zhan from Judge's Court
Brothers always
Your Majesty, I've something to report
Your Majesty, Yue Hua has a request
There are so many guys in the world
but Zhan is really unique
He's too fussy at his age
I am afraid I can't stand Zhan anymore
Actually, I can't stand him right now
So, Your Majesty, please allow me
to cancel the wedding
Thank you for your love
I choose you
Don't you have something to say to me?
None
What a special way to start the new year
especially when a mouse loves a cat