A Kid in Aladdin's Palace (1997) - full transcript
A teenager goes back in time to help the legendary Ali Baba save Aladdin and his kingdom from an evil villain.
Mmm. A well-deserved
vacation.
Give me the sunscreen.
Hey.
Hey! Wait a minute.
You said we were going
to the colossus of Rhodes
and then hanging
at the hanging gardens
of Babylon.
Not the cave of wonders.
I'm not liking this.
It cannot be helped.
This wouldn't have
anything to do
with your bonehead
brother, would it?
Alas, yes.
His evil plan
is finally complete.
Al, you can't let him
get to me.
You know his tent flaps
are not nailed down.
He still believes that
the Nile runs that way.
If something should happen,
and I do not return...
You know what to do.
Yeah. Right.
I'm sure the bats and I
will be very happy.
Give me the key...
Brother.
As usual,
you come too late,
brother.
The cave is sealed,
and only the deliverer
can open it.
The deliverer
is a fairy tale.
I will find the key
and take the lamp
for myself.
You could search
for a thousand lifetimes
and never find it.
The power of the genie
will never be yours.
You speak
of a thousand lifetimes.
How would you like
a thousand deaths?
[Gasps]
[Moans]
Fear not, brother.
Your wife and daughter
will be well taken care of.
It's the least I can do.
Why do we not
just kill him?
Because if he dies,
his first blood
inherits the throne.
And we can't have
that sniveling little Princess
telling us what to do,
can we?
So we just
let him sleep.
Precisely.
Is he...
Dead, my queen?
Worse.
He sleeps the sleep
of a thousand deaths.
I warned him.
When one rules,
one makes many enemies.
But the people
love my father.
Evidently not all of them,
Princess.
Leave us.
I want to be alone
with my husband.
As you wish,
your highness.
I must attend
to my duties as...
Sultan.
At least until
my dear brother awakens.
Princess Sheherazade:
I don't trust him, mother.
Oh, it's here.
Your uncle is
so consumed with power
he misses the obvious.
What is it?
Shh. Shh. Shh.
It's a map
to the pieces of a key.
Key?
To the cave of wonders.
Your father told me
if anything happened to him
to keep this safe,
and someone would come
for it.
Who?
The deliverer.
The deliverer?
She's here.
Who, Calvin?
Valery Broushard.
The ivory tower
of Reseda high.
Oh, man, she comes in here
every Friday after ballet class,
and every Friday you say
the same thing.
Why don't you do something
different this time, Calvin?
Calvin: Like what?
Charley:
Like ask her out.
She's the most popular girl
in school.
She's not gonna go for me.
Trust me.
I got the answer
to all your prayers right here.
Bam.
There you go,
partner dude.
Sun-dried tomatoes
and goat cheese.
No, thanks.
I'm not hungry.
It's not for you.
It's for her.
But she hasn't
ordered yet.
Calvin...
This is what
she always orders.
Ok, now...
One slice of sun-fried
goat-cheese tomatoes.
Here.
Oh. How sweet.
I didn't even
have to order.
But aren't you
forgetting something?
Forgetting something?
Yeah. We've got
the small pizza,
sun-dried tomatoes,
goat cheese...
Diet coke.
Diet coke.
Yeah.
I forgot the diet coke.
Hey. Hold up a sec,
Einstein.
Think you're up
for the question of the day?
You're gonna give me
a shot
at the question
of the day?
That's cute.
Anyway, see that killer
'vette out there?
Know who owns it?
Love to go to the dance
in a car like that.
It's mine.
Really?
Yeah, really.
I, uh, I always drive
the 'vette on Fridays.
So, uh,
what do you say...
Calvin...
Is it a date?
Yes! Ho! My man, Calvin!
Way to go, way to go,
way to go!
Whoo!
Whoo!
Boom boom!
Boom boom!
♪ Calvin gonna have
some fun tonight ♪
♪ Calvin gonna have
some fun tonight ♪
No.
What? What's the matter,
your John Travolta
suit's in the wash?
Worse.
I told her I'd take her
to the dance in the 'vette.
In Elliot's car?
Oh, Calvin, are you
out of your mind?
Tell us something
we don't know, Charley.
But you can chill
on this one, full burp.
I'm gonna get you
off the hook.
Really? You're gonna
loan me your car?
You moron.
I'm going to the dance
with Valery...
In my car.
Ok, guys, listen up.
I gotta get to the bank
before it closes.
Elliot,
I want you to wash up
that box of old pots
I bought at the auction.
Calvin,
you're out of here.
Have a good time
at the dance.
But, dad, I was gonna
go to the dance.
Oh, gee,
let me think about this.
B-plus average.
D-minus average.
He goes. You stay.
Bye, Mr. Knockbest.
Where do you think
you're going?
The dance.
Um, I brought
all my stuff
to go from here
and everything.
Let me explain something
to you, full dork.
I am a senior.
You are a waste
of high school
gymnasium space.
Ergo, you stay here
and wash the pots,
and I'm gonna
go fix my hair.
Mmm!
Finally someone
rubbed the lamp.
Quick, I have
to save Aladdin.
But first,
I want a piece of that.
Mmm. Oily, but good.
I was having a little bit
of a sugar dip...
But I'm back in the zone.
Ok, camel kid,
go get the guy
who rubbed the lamp.
I rubbed the lamp.
[Plop]
No.
I hate my life.
Ugh.
Ok...
My name is achmed,
and I am the genie
of the lamp.
And I've been in there...
On vacation...
For...
What millennium is it?
Um, it's the 20th century.
Get out a Baghdad.
You mean I've been locked
in that crappy little tchatchka
for 1,200 years?
What are you
talking about?
We're going back in time.
We're gonna save Aladdin.
No. Not me.
Not again.
I'm not going.
There's nothing
you can do to make me.
Ooh! Aah.
Ooh. Aah!
Ooh. Aah.
Except maybe that.
Now, listen.
Aladdin has
an evil brother Luxor
who has gone postal.
You have to get me
out of the lamp
so I can stop him.
But you're already
out of the lamp.
Now.
But...
1,200 years ago,
which is my now...
Not your now.
My now then...
I am in
that Verkhahkta cave
stuck in that lamp.
Now, in case
you haven't noticed,
I am a genie.
There are rules.
There are regulations.
I cannot change history.
And that...
That's where you come in.
Get me out of that cave,
Calvin,
and together
we can stand up
and save Aladdin.
Stand up together.
I can't even stand up
for myself.
Stop with
the insecurity thing.
It's very annoying.
You have got to take
responsibility
for rubbing the lamp.
Ok?
Now pay
very close attention.
An important word is going
to be uttered by moi.
It's your...
Destiny.
Destiny?
But where do I go?
What am I gonna do?
Oh, did I forget to tell you
the best part?
You're the deliverer.
Whoo!
Oh!
Whoa!
Sire,
considering the sentiment
of the people,
I do not think it wise
to be out on the street.
Nonsense.
I love being out
among my people...
Taking whatever
I want.
Please, I barely have enough
to feed my family.
And that is too much.
My money.
My money.
Hmm. How agreeable.
Now whose turn?
A thousand pardons,
effendi.
Get away from me,
you leper!
Guards! Seize him!
This is no leper.
He's only a thief.
Mmm. Kill him.
Rishad:
Certainly, sire.
Oh!
The deliverer!
The evil brother!
Seize him!
[Sniffing]
Interesting entrance.
Yeah.
How do I explain that?
You may start
by telling me
your business
here in Basra.
Um, school field trip?
I think not.
Shall I kill him?
Yes.
No.
On second thought,
take them both
to the house
of pain.
Ooh. Good.
[Snaps]
Calvin: I knew
this was a bad idea.
Hey, is anyone
listening to me?
At last,
the lamp is finally
within my grasp.
So what is
this house of pain, anyway?
It is where
you will be one
with the rats.
Ha ha ha!
Seems our friend
has been kicked
by one
too many camels.
It's too crazy.
What is too crazy?
Nothing. I mean...
Get ready.
Hope this works.
Obi wan Kenobi on computer:
Luke, behind you!
Luke, use the force.
The force?
I'll explain later.
Move!
Out of my way!
Get out of my way!
Come here!
You're not from here.
Oh, you could tell, huh?
Calvin Fuller
from Reseda.
My friends call me
Ali baba.
Ali baba?
The great Ali baba?
Yes.
The man with a thousand
prices on his head.
After them!
I want them!
Come,
let's have some fun.
Out of my way,
you fools!
Get out! This way!
Stop! You there!
After them!
After them!
Lunch.
There they are!
Whoa!
Quick! After them!
I want them!
I want to kill them
myself!
I want to kill!
I want everything!
Don't just lie there!
Get after them,
you dogs!
Get out of my way!
Out! Out!
Look.
Hmm.
Now...
They must be here
somewhere.
[Bleating]
The guards are unusually
persistent today.
It's me.
They must know
I'm here to save Aladdin.
You?
How can you
save Aladdin?
You're just a boy.
A boy?
Uh-oh.
It's them!
After them!
Let's get out of here.
Come, Calvin.
Out of my way!
This way.
Out of my way!
Aah!
Quick.
Oof.
Oh.
Great. Dead end.
Aah!
Ooh.
Oh.
Aah.
Ooh!
After them!
After them,
you fools!
Follow me.
Whoa!
Whoa!
Aah!
That was close.
You did well.
Hurry.
Over this wall
lies our freedom.
I can't.
I have to go
to the palace.
The palace?
How else am I gonna get
to the cave of wonders?
The cave of wonders?
Right.
But first I really gotta
see the queen.
I said I need
to seethe queen,
not Bethe queen.
Only a sultan
or a handmaid
may enter
the royal quarters.
[Giggling]
Thank you,
achmed.
Girls, girls.
Hello, Ali.
Who's
your friend?
Why do I get the feeling
you've been here before?
How dare you frolic while
the palace is in mourning?
Have you no respect?
Why do you not bow?
[High-pitched voice]
Uh, my knees pop.
It's really
embarrassing.
I know every face
in this palace,
and I do not recognize
either of you ladies.
Whoa. Hold it.
Um, the genie
sent me here.
Genie?
Yeah. You know, big guy,
lots of smoke.
It's all true,
Princess.
Silence.
I did not address you.
Who are you?
I asked you
a question.
The deliverer.
Surely you cannot be
the deliverer.
Well, that's what
the genie told me.
Princess!
Why do you enter
my private quarters?
Pardon my intrusion.
I am looking for a thief
and a boy.
Look around.
I see only girls here.
Hello.
I have not seen you
before.
Oh, god.
Allow me
to introduce you
to our newest flower
in the garden...
Fatima.
She has just arrived
on the galley from...
[High-pitched voice]
Sheboygan.
Sheboygan.
Sheboygan?
Perhaps you would like
to get to know her better.
[Whispering]
What?
Just go.
[High-pitched voice]
Um, yes.
Yes, come. Come.
Go. You may use
my private quarters.
Mmm.
You smell divine.
Um, old spice.
Oh, please, just one kiss
for little Hassim?
Ok, but first close
those beady little eyes.
Hurry.
Hassim does not
like to wait.
Now, now,
you naughty boy.
Close those eyes.
Give it to me,
my little puppet.
Mmm.
You got it!
Unh!
Calvin:
He doesn't look so good.
He sleeps the sleep
of a thousand deaths.
You'd think after 5 or 6
he wouldn't care.
He is the one I spoke of,
mother.
The one who says
he is the deliverer.
Welcome.
We have waited a long time
for you to come.
Not him,
mother.
Him.
Ahem.
You?
I find it hard to believe
myself.
I find it impossible.
And yet, daughter,
the legend states
the deliverer
will come from a land
we least expect.
Calvin: It's a map.
Queen Jasmine:
To the cave of wonders.
What are, um,
these doohickeys?
This is where
you will find
the pieces
of the key.
The key?
Your journey will take you
far beyond the sea of sand
to the valley of death.
Death?
Surely the deliverer is not
afraid of his own death?
Well, his,no.
Mine, yeah.
Come, deliverer.
Time to start our quest.
Mother...
You're not going to allow
that thief to accompany us.
The journey
is far too dangerous
for the heir
to the throne.
What?
Ali baba will protect
the deliverer.
Yes, but who will protect
the deliverer from Ali baba?
Come.
You haven't much time.
Allah works
in mysterious ways.
If a boy
is to deliver us...
Then so be it.
Ali: Come, Calvin.
We have a long journey
ahead of us.
Your excellency.
Mmm.
Colorful entrance.
Oh.
Thank you, master.
Uh, the...
Don't tell me.
The prisoners
have escaped.
Well, yes.
I will call
the palace guard.
Rishad...
Yes, your magnificence?
Who knows of this?
No one.
That is how
it shall remain.
There you are.
I was beginning to wonder
how long I'd have to wait.
Camels.
Bitchin'.
These camels
belong to me.
Where they go,
I go.
Or you may try
the royal stables
down the road.
I'm sure the guards would
love to show you theirs.
I'll take this one.
Very well.
You shall ride
sirocco.
Oh, sirocco.
Like the car?
[Breaks wind]
No...
Like the wind.
Sire...
They flee
into the desert.
Your powers of observation
astound me.
I will go after them
and kill them.
Not today,
rishad.
It is all part
of my plan.
It is?
Only that witless boy
can get me the lamp.
And with it,
I shall be the most
powerful man on earth.
Zah! Zah!
Hey, Ali,
check it out!
Zah! Zah! See?
I almost got it.
Hey, cool hat.
When do I get one?
This turban
marks our clan.
It is not given freely.
It is earned.
Earned?
If you really want one of
those silly looking things,
wait until he's sleeping
and steal it from him.
That is how you join
a clan of thieves.
Here...
To give you strength.
Mmm.
Beef jerky.
Gecko.
Gecko?
You mean those
cute little lizards?
Ali:
Mmm.
Much better
than snake.
So the deliverer
does have human needs.
Look, Princess...
Isn't there something
else I can call you
besides Princess?
My name
is Sheherazade.
Um...
How about I just
call you Sherry?
You are the deliverer.
You may call me
what you wish.
Hey, Ali, in my time,
we call this a dead end.
In mine,
we call it home.
Behold...
The incredible power
of Ali baba.
Hey, wait a minute, Ali.
What is it?
I've always wanted
to do this.
Open sesame!
How could you know
the secret?
I'm the deliverer...
Remember?
Hey, just like
summer camp.
So this is where I meet
the 40 thieves, right?
Ha. 40 thieves.
I have only
my 3 brothers.
Ali! Brother,
you have returned!
Ali baba
and the 3 thieves?
Ali: Hummis,
kous kous,
and Bob.
Well, at least
he's not named after food.
Bob...
Short for kebab.
Gather your things,
my brothers,
for we ride on the greatest
adventure of a lifetime.
We are going to Aqaba
to look for girls?
No, we ride
for the cave of wonders.
Ahh! Then we are
after the treasure!
No. We ride to save
our beloved sultan...
Aladdin.
Huh?
Eh?
Just gather
our supplies.
Ali?
Yes, brother?
Aladdin is our enemy.
Why would we want
to save him?
We ride for treasure,
not for a sultan.
We will make our move
when the time is right.
Jasmine:
You asked to see me?
Ah, my queen.
You have never looked
more radiant.
Your perception
needs an education...
My husband's brother.
Indeed I am, but
I am also your sultan.
And a sultan has...Needs.
I'm not interested
in your needs, sir.
You will be soon.
This used to be
such a happy place.
I hate happy.
Ya-Hoo!
Ya-Hoo!
Calvin: An oasis. You think
they have a hot tub?
[Laughter]
For a lamp, it does not
burn very long.
Oh, it's not a lamp.
Here, I'll show you.
It's called a camera.
See? It takes
your picture.
It is a moment capturer.
[Singing]
[Whirring]
Problem gums.
Haven't you ever seen anyone
brush their teeth before?
I guess not.
[Snoring]
Ali?
What's wrong?
I thought I heard something,
but it was nothing.
Go back to sleep.
Ali?
You're not just in this
for the treasure, are you?
I give you my word, Calvin.
Oh! Hey!
I warned you about him.
Now what's wrong?
My father's life
is in the hands
of a thief and boy.
What could be right
about that?
Look, all I wanted to do
was go to a dance.
I didn't ask
to be here, either.
You mean you are here
against your will?
Well, I...
I thought I was.
I gotta climb that?
You are the deliverer.
The minaret of Allah.
But, brother, no one
has ever climbed it
and lived
to tell about it.
Shh. Shh. Someone's
got to do it.
Calvin,
it cannot be done.
My father has hidden
the key too well.
You'll need wings
to reach it.
Wings, right.
Really big wings.
Yeah. Really big wings.
Sherry, you're a genius!
May Allah
guide your path.
As long as it's
not straight down.
I'll see you
at the bottom.
Remember what I told you.
When we get close,
you reach out with this
and snag the key.
Calvin, are you sure
this will fly?
Hey, if it doesn't,
you can scatter my ashes
over the harem.
Aah!
My god,
we're going to die!
Calvin!
Whoa!
Oh, Calvin!
Help!
Oh, no! Aah!
Lean right!
[Gasping]
Hey, you can open
your eyes.
Oh, my goodness!
We're flying!
This is amazing!
We're actually flying!
Calvin, I've always
wanted to do this!
This is my dream!
I think
it's right over there!
Straight ahead.
All right.
Look, there it is.
That thing's bigger
than I thought.
Ok?
Let's see if we can't
get some altitude, huh?
It's the key!
You see it?
Yes, I see it.
Here. Get ready.
Take the stick.
I've got it. Ok.
Oh!
Ok, what?
Lean. We've got to
straighten out a bit.
All right.
You ready?
Yes.
Now!
I got it!
Pull it up!
We got it! Ha ha!
We got it!
Yes!
Yes!
All right!
That was bitchin'!
All right!
[Giggling]
Now we celebrate our victory
with a special treat.
What's that, Ali?
Dessert.
Those...those are bugs.
My brothers will be
supremely insulted
if you refuse.
Right.
[Crunch]
[Chuckling]
How does it taste,
Calvin of Reseda?
Like, um, chicken.
Slimy...white...chicken.
Princess?
I have no time
for your games.
We still have
a long way to go.
You like her, yes?
I don't know.
You should tell her.
Are you crazy?
She's...
Guys like me
don't get girls like her.
As long as you
think that way
it will be that way.
Yeah, but we're
too different.
We speak
different languages.
There is only one
language of the heart.
Speak to her in it,
and she will listen.
Calvin...
Calvin...
Calvin...
Aah! Oh, yuck!
Oh, gross.
It seems sirocco has
finally found his mate.
Oh, great.
Wait.
What?
You have much to learn
about our land.
Um, how deadly
is that thing?
You would not have had time
to scream in agony.
That long, huh?
[Giggling]
What are you laughing at?
He just saved my life.
But how do you know he did
not put it there himself?
Calvin: That's
a big sandbox.
Ali: It is
the sea of sand.
No food, no water,
no living thing
until the other side.
What's on
the other side?
The valley of death.
Great.
Water.
Water.
Haagen Dazs.
Haagen Dazs.
Do you see that?
What?
I'll race you. Zah!
Calvin, no!
Zah!
Calvin, stop!
Stop! It's not real!
Oh, I don't care!
I got to have a whopper!
[Brays]
Sherry: Zah!
Let's go, sirocco.
Zah!
Zah!
Oh! Uhh!
Ohh.
Are you all right?
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
I could've sworn it was
right over there by that dune.
There is nothing.
The desert plays tricks
on your mind.
Oh, you mean a mirage?
Uh-huh.
So that's not
a hurricane, right?
[Wind blowing]
Oh, by Allah.
Calvin!
Calvin, get down!
It's too late!
Calvin!
Don't leave me!
Sherry!
Calvin, where
are you going?
Where's Ali?
Calvin, don't leave me!
[Wind howling]
Help!
Be careful, Calvin!
Help!
Help me!
Calvin: Sherry?
Yes?
Is that your hand?
No.
[Blows]
[Blows]
[Coughs]
[Laughs]
[Laughs]
[Tosses]
[Camels bray]
Come on.
We got to find Ali.
Calvin: Do you see
anybody?
They got to be here
somewhere.
There!
There they are!
I got an idea.
Come on.
Let's go.
Let's rock.
Ha ha!
Aah! Aah!
Sherry: Aah!
Ha ha!
Whoo!
Whoo!
You all right?
My brothers.
Hurry. Help them.
Sherry: Your riding has
much improved, Calvin.
Yeah, I can almost
keep up.
Sherry?
Yes?
Do you have a boyfriend?
If you mean a prince,
I have not yet met one
who is my equal.
In other words, no.
And yourself?
How many are
in your harem?
My harem?
I wish.
I can't even get a date
to the dance.
A date?
But why would you dance
with a date?
No, no, I...I mean...
I haven't met anyone,
either.
Oh, you're alone.
I know what that's like.
But you're a Princess.
Everybody wants
to go out with you.
Don't they?
[Clicks tongue]
Please.
Please wake up.
Return to us
before it's too late.
Luxor: You rise early,
my queen.
Just as my dear brother
remains...
Unrisen.
I still have hope.
And I grow impatient.
I will never
forsake him.
A word of advice, my nearly
departed brother's wife...
Rule with me
or die with my enemies.
Don't tell me...
The valley of death.
We'll make camp here
and begin our search
at first light.
Why must we wait,
thief?
It is unwise to disturb
the dead at night.
Scissors cuts paper.
What are scissors?
It's like 2 knives.
They kind of hin...
[Distant howling]
Do you hear that?
It seems to be
calling your name.
Oh, really?
Like I know anyone
in the valley of death.
We must follow it.
Yeah, sure...
First thing in the morning.
Calvin.
I know the thief
has no courage,
but I hope the deliverer
is not counted with him.
All right, I'm with you.
[Wind blows]
Calvin:
What is this place?
It's the final home for
those who die in battle.
Some say there's an army
of ghostly warriors
that guard the dead.
Great. 1,001 nights
of the living dead.
[Camel breaks wind]
Sirocco...
What are you doing here?
He misses you.
All right.
Come on.
That's it.
What's it?
The moon.
It's just like
the amulet, see?
[Moaning]
Come on. The sound's
coming from over here.
[Moaning]
Here.
Hold this.
Sherry: The key.
Uhh!
[Thunder]
What's that?
[Neighing]
The guardians of the dead.
New rule...
Never take jewelry
off a dead guy.
Sherry: Oh, my gosh!
Uhh!
Fire gets them?
Sherry: They're coming back!
Come on. There's
still 2 left.
They're coming back,
Calvin!
Come on.
I've got
an idea.
[Sirocco brays]
Sirocco, now!
[Breaks wind]
Sherry: It worked!
[Sirocco brays]
Maybe you are
the deliverer.
You all right?
I was making a wish.
Really?
Can you tell me, or...
Do you have
to keep it a secret
for it to come true?
No, I may share it with you,
because it will never
come true.
Remember when you asked me
if I had a boyfriend?
Yeah.
That was
pretty lame, huh?
I was just a kid then.
That was yesterday.
Well, yesterday
and 1,200 years.
It matters not.
Your question
was no more lame
than my reply.
Calvin...
Yeah?
Why could you not
have been a prince?
Ali: Are you sure
this is the way?
Calvin: That's what
the map says.
We're going to make it,
Sherry.
Calvin: It's got to be
around here somewhere.
I just hope
we're not too late.
This is it.
Now what?
The key?
Oh, yeah. Right.
[Rumbling]
Did I do that?
Fulfill your destiny.
Yeah!
[Excited chatter]
Oh, my god!
Calvin, there.
By all the grains of sand
in all the deserts
of the world...
Hey, Ali...
Remember why we're here?
Of course, Calvin.
How could I forget?
It is time, my brothers.
[Others laugh]
[Lava bubbling]
Calvin: Ali, no!
A thousand pardons,
Calvin...
But here is
where we must part.
You can't do this.
You gave me your word.
You have fulfilled
your destiny.
It is time for me
to fulfill mine.
You were right.
It matters not.
Rub the lamp.
The genie
can help us.
He can't.
His powers don't work
in the cave of wonders.
What is it, brother?
[Sighs]
It is the boy.
Leave if you must,
brothers...
But I cannot.
We are united
in this, brother.
Bob: Wherever you go,
we go.
There will be
other treasures.
There's no way
out of here.
There's gotta be.
I will never
save my father.
We'll never get
out of here.
Yeah, we will.
What is it?
Fishing line.
300-pound test.
Here.
I use it
to tie pizzas
to my bike,
like this.
What's that?
Swiss army knife.
[Gasp]
Chicks dig 'em.
300-pound test...
Fishing line...
Pizza?
You come from
very interesting times.
It's a laugh a minute.
Come on.
The crowd's on their feet.
Fuller's going for 3.
He's up...
He shoots...He scores!
Yes! Nothing but net.
Impossible.
That's why I'm here,
to make the impossible
possible.
Hold on.
Calvin, uh...
Let's go.
Aah!
Whoo!
That was incredible.
You are finer
than any prince,
Calvin Fuller,
and greater
than any king.
Let's go get your dad.
Uhh!
[Gasp]
Calvin: Luxor.
The deliverer.
How nice
to see you again.
Thank you
for the lamp.
I was wrong, Calvin.
Forgive me.
So you can
betray us again?
As usual, Princess,
you are wrong.
They were on their way
to save you.
Can't think why.
Let go of me.
Calvin!
Let her go, Luxor.
She is no longer
your concern.
At last...
The genie is mine!
A thousand pardons,
Calvin.
10,000 pardons,
Calvin.
100,000?
Yes, exactly.
Search the cavern.
See if there's
any way out of here.
Ali...
You planned it
all along, didn't you?
You were just in it
for the treasure.
I've dreamed
of this treasure
my entire life,
and now I have it.
All of it.
And it pleases me not.
[Throws coins into chest]
Is it true that...
You were coming back
to warn us?
Or was that just
a mirage, too?
My head told me
to forget you,
but my heart
would not allow it.
Before you came,
I was nothing.
A thief...
And I was
glad in it.
But you raised me on
a cloud of courage.
You spoke of me
as if I was
some great warrior.
You called me
a hero.
I have spent
a lifetime running.
That is what
makes a good thief,
and I am the best.
Hey...
Anyone can run.
I ought to know.
But it takes a hero
to stand up
and face his fears.
I am no hero.
Yeah, you are.
You just don't know it yet.
Ali! Ali!
We found
the passage!
Come!
Let's go.
Looks like a way out.
Over there.
Do you hear water?
[Screaming]
Calvin: Sirocco!
Let's go save
the Princess.
Ok, ok, ok. I'm coming.
Keep your shorts on.
Yo.
Oh...great.
More bad news.
Genie...
Make me
the most powerful man
in the world.
Done.
Make me the richest man
in the world.
Done.
Well?
Well what?
Your third wish.
How about a vacation?
Herculaneum?
Pompeii?
I heard Vesuvius was hot.
I think I'll keep it.
[Door creaks]
Back in the lamp.
[Groans]
Your
worshipfulness?
Yes?
The palace
is filled
with gold
and jewels.
And?
And...
All the leaders
of all the lands
are here,
begging to pledge
their allegiance to you.
I want you to do
something for me.
Anything, your most
magnificent excellence.
Build a gallows.
A beheading?
My favorite holiday.
Who is the guest
of honor?
The Princess.
[Laughing]
[Camel brays]
You ready to go, Ali?
Something
is missing.
Yeah, about
100 more men.
No, it's not that.
How can you ride
with us
looking like someone
from Reseda?
There.
With this, you are
truly our brother.
Now we are Ali baba
and the 4thieves.
[Cheering]
Cool.
[Shouting]
Today I wipe the last trace
of my brother
from the face
of this earth.
Wait.
Yes?
You win.
Free my daughter,
and I will consent
to rule by your side.
I no longer
need you, madam.
I have the lamp.
[Crowd gasps]
For crimes
against the kingdom...
For high treason...
For consorting
with the enemy...
For willfulness
and disobedience...
For stealing
the royal camels...
[Camel
breaks wind]
Ew!eww!
Luxor Al Hasred,
supreme ruler
of the universe,
does hereby proclaim
Princess Sheherazade
a traitor.
The sentence is...
Death.
I never liked you.
[Brays]
Do something.
I knew you'd come.
Of course.
Rishad: Guards!
After them!
Let's go.
My toes.
Ohh.
Master,
they're escaping.
Find them...
And kill them!
After them! They're
getting away! Come on!
Go! Move!
Go! Move!
Get them! Get them!
Do not let them get away!
Thank you, Ali baba.
I'm forever
your servant.
We will save
your father,
or we will
die trying.
And I was worried about
asking a girl to dance.
Let's go.
Hey, back there...
What did you whisper
in sirocco's ear?
I told him I would
light the next one.
[Gasp]
Well?
The passage
is heavily guarded.
Then we'll have to
go in another way.
There is no other way.
[Donkey braying]
Calvin: Sherry...
What's that?
A trader with oil
for the palace. Why?
Think it's time to do
a little trading of our own.
Die, infidel.
Heh heh heh.
Oil for the supreme
ruler of the universe.
Hurry. Time's wasting.
Yeah.
Yeah.
[Whistles]
Let's go.
I'll eat it
on the way.
[Gasp]
Sorry, boys.
Kitchen's closed.
[Sniffs]
Old spice?
Oh, no.
Get him!
[Yelling]
Heh heh heh heh.
Huh?
Uhh.
Aah!
Strike!
Aah! Aah!
Ha ha!
Kick him!
Good shot.
Shall we?
Let's go.
Come on!
[Chuckling]
This is it,
the door to Luxor's tower.
Any chance of you guys
giving up peacefully?
Go! Rrr!
I guess not.
Get the lamp.
We'll hold them off.
Sir, we are defeated!
Be quiet,
you miserable worm.
Oh, now what?
Genie, I command you,
kill the deliverer.
Why do you
laugh at me?
That was your third wish,
but you're not
gonna get it.
Genies can't kill.
Genie rules.
Next time...
Read the manual.
I don't have the boy...
But I still have you,
and that means
Aladdin will die.
They'll never
get the lamp.
Sire, please
take me with you!
You may have saved
the Princess,
but you will
never save Aladdin.
Hurry!
He's getting away!
He has the lamp!
Without it,
my father will die!
We must stop him!
How?
I know.
A magic carpet?
Hurry!
Well, how do you
start this thing?
You command it.
Giddyup.
Not again.
[Horse neighs]
[Whistles]
Ha ha.
Where is that boy?
Ohh!
Uh-oh.
Uhh!
Give me back
my lamp.
Whoa. Are you nuts?
Possibly.
You miserable specimen.
You've ruined
everything.
Does that hurt?
I never want to
forget this moment.
You won't.
Aah!
[Screaming]
Aah!
Oh, no.
[Breaks wind]
Ohh.
Mother.
You're safe.
Yo, Calvin.
Good to see you, homes.
You made it,
and you were worried
you weren't good enough.
Look at you.
[Sniff sniff]
When was the last time
you changed that shirt?
Hey, it wasn't exactly
a 3-hour tour, ok?
All right, all right.
Shake it out.
The important thing
is you did it,
and you did it well.
I thought I’d
never see you again.
Father.
Daughter.
[Groaning]
Much has happened.
Don't ask.
I do not know
who you are,
and yet I feel...
We've been friends
for eternity.
You slept
through most of it.
The deliverer.
The deliverer.
Calvin Fuller,
sir,
from Reseda.
Thank you,
Calvin Fuller,
for bringing
us all together.
Ali baba, sire.
Once a thief,
now at your service.
Thank you, Ali baba.
Come. Our people
are waiting.
Hey. Don't everybody
thank me at once.
[Cheering]
It is time?
I have to go home,
Sherry.
Then it is true?
You are leaving us?
Yeah.
Every hero ought to
have one of these.
Swiss army knife.
Chicks dig 'em.
Oh.
Thank you, brother.
I will never forget you.
I would give you
my word,
but what good
is the word of a thief?
Very good.
I thought you
could use this.
I'll never forget you.
No matter where...
No matter when...
I will find you.
Calvin, my boy!
I am at your disposal
to take you anywhere
that you want at any time.
You want to see
the pyramids go up,
you got it.
What about the ice age?
It's awesome.
What do you think?
I hear Reseda is nice
this time of year.
Yeah.
Yee-ha!
Very funny,
achmed.
Elliot.
Fuller.
Hey, um,
nice zit.
Say hello to the afterlife.
[Groans]
Hey, Elliot, can I
borrow your car tonight?
Gee, thanks.
Go on, Calvin.
Do the right thing.
Thanks, Charley.
I will.
Hey, Valery, look, um,
about tonight...
You're never
gonna forget it.
Look, Valery....
That 'vette
out there, it...
It's not mine.
Not yours?
Nope.
Then you can forget
about tonight.
That's what I thought.
Hey, Charley.
Give those back to Elliot
when he wakes up.
You don't want to
go to the dance
in that old thing.
Sherry!
Ohh.
What are you
doing here?
Let's just say
you're my first wish.
First? What about
the rest?
You'll see.
vacation.
Give me the sunscreen.
Hey.
Hey! Wait a minute.
You said we were going
to the colossus of Rhodes
and then hanging
at the hanging gardens
of Babylon.
Not the cave of wonders.
I'm not liking this.
It cannot be helped.
This wouldn't have
anything to do
with your bonehead
brother, would it?
Alas, yes.
His evil plan
is finally complete.
Al, you can't let him
get to me.
You know his tent flaps
are not nailed down.
He still believes that
the Nile runs that way.
If something should happen,
and I do not return...
You know what to do.
Yeah. Right.
I'm sure the bats and I
will be very happy.
Give me the key...
Brother.
As usual,
you come too late,
brother.
The cave is sealed,
and only the deliverer
can open it.
The deliverer
is a fairy tale.
I will find the key
and take the lamp
for myself.
You could search
for a thousand lifetimes
and never find it.
The power of the genie
will never be yours.
You speak
of a thousand lifetimes.
How would you like
a thousand deaths?
[Gasps]
[Moans]
Fear not, brother.
Your wife and daughter
will be well taken care of.
It's the least I can do.
Why do we not
just kill him?
Because if he dies,
his first blood
inherits the throne.
And we can't have
that sniveling little Princess
telling us what to do,
can we?
So we just
let him sleep.
Precisely.
Is he...
Dead, my queen?
Worse.
He sleeps the sleep
of a thousand deaths.
I warned him.
When one rules,
one makes many enemies.
But the people
love my father.
Evidently not all of them,
Princess.
Leave us.
I want to be alone
with my husband.
As you wish,
your highness.
I must attend
to my duties as...
Sultan.
At least until
my dear brother awakens.
Princess Sheherazade:
I don't trust him, mother.
Oh, it's here.
Your uncle is
so consumed with power
he misses the obvious.
What is it?
Shh. Shh. Shh.
It's a map
to the pieces of a key.
Key?
To the cave of wonders.
Your father told me
if anything happened to him
to keep this safe,
and someone would come
for it.
Who?
The deliverer.
The deliverer?
She's here.
Who, Calvin?
Valery Broushard.
The ivory tower
of Reseda high.
Oh, man, she comes in here
every Friday after ballet class,
and every Friday you say
the same thing.
Why don't you do something
different this time, Calvin?
Calvin: Like what?
Charley:
Like ask her out.
She's the most popular girl
in school.
She's not gonna go for me.
Trust me.
I got the answer
to all your prayers right here.
Bam.
There you go,
partner dude.
Sun-dried tomatoes
and goat cheese.
No, thanks.
I'm not hungry.
It's not for you.
It's for her.
But she hasn't
ordered yet.
Calvin...
This is what
she always orders.
Ok, now...
One slice of sun-fried
goat-cheese tomatoes.
Here.
Oh. How sweet.
I didn't even
have to order.
But aren't you
forgetting something?
Forgetting something?
Yeah. We've got
the small pizza,
sun-dried tomatoes,
goat cheese...
Diet coke.
Diet coke.
Yeah.
I forgot the diet coke.
Hey. Hold up a sec,
Einstein.
Think you're up
for the question of the day?
You're gonna give me
a shot
at the question
of the day?
That's cute.
Anyway, see that killer
'vette out there?
Know who owns it?
Love to go to the dance
in a car like that.
It's mine.
Really?
Yeah, really.
I, uh, I always drive
the 'vette on Fridays.
So, uh,
what do you say...
Calvin...
Is it a date?
Yes! Ho! My man, Calvin!
Way to go, way to go,
way to go!
Whoo!
Whoo!
Boom boom!
Boom boom!
♪ Calvin gonna have
some fun tonight ♪
♪ Calvin gonna have
some fun tonight ♪
No.
What? What's the matter,
your John Travolta
suit's in the wash?
Worse.
I told her I'd take her
to the dance in the 'vette.
In Elliot's car?
Oh, Calvin, are you
out of your mind?
Tell us something
we don't know, Charley.
But you can chill
on this one, full burp.
I'm gonna get you
off the hook.
Really? You're gonna
loan me your car?
You moron.
I'm going to the dance
with Valery...
In my car.
Ok, guys, listen up.
I gotta get to the bank
before it closes.
Elliot,
I want you to wash up
that box of old pots
I bought at the auction.
Calvin,
you're out of here.
Have a good time
at the dance.
But, dad, I was gonna
go to the dance.
Oh, gee,
let me think about this.
B-plus average.
D-minus average.
He goes. You stay.
Bye, Mr. Knockbest.
Where do you think
you're going?
The dance.
Um, I brought
all my stuff
to go from here
and everything.
Let me explain something
to you, full dork.
I am a senior.
You are a waste
of high school
gymnasium space.
Ergo, you stay here
and wash the pots,
and I'm gonna
go fix my hair.
Mmm!
Finally someone
rubbed the lamp.
Quick, I have
to save Aladdin.
But first,
I want a piece of that.
Mmm. Oily, but good.
I was having a little bit
of a sugar dip...
But I'm back in the zone.
Ok, camel kid,
go get the guy
who rubbed the lamp.
I rubbed the lamp.
[Plop]
No.
I hate my life.
Ugh.
Ok...
My name is achmed,
and I am the genie
of the lamp.
And I've been in there...
On vacation...
For...
What millennium is it?
Um, it's the 20th century.
Get out a Baghdad.
You mean I've been locked
in that crappy little tchatchka
for 1,200 years?
What are you
talking about?
We're going back in time.
We're gonna save Aladdin.
No. Not me.
Not again.
I'm not going.
There's nothing
you can do to make me.
Ooh! Aah.
Ooh. Aah!
Ooh. Aah.
Except maybe that.
Now, listen.
Aladdin has
an evil brother Luxor
who has gone postal.
You have to get me
out of the lamp
so I can stop him.
But you're already
out of the lamp.
Now.
But...
1,200 years ago,
which is my now...
Not your now.
My now then...
I am in
that Verkhahkta cave
stuck in that lamp.
Now, in case
you haven't noticed,
I am a genie.
There are rules.
There are regulations.
I cannot change history.
And that...
That's where you come in.
Get me out of that cave,
Calvin,
and together
we can stand up
and save Aladdin.
Stand up together.
I can't even stand up
for myself.
Stop with
the insecurity thing.
It's very annoying.
You have got to take
responsibility
for rubbing the lamp.
Ok?
Now pay
very close attention.
An important word is going
to be uttered by moi.
It's your...
Destiny.
Destiny?
But where do I go?
What am I gonna do?
Oh, did I forget to tell you
the best part?
You're the deliverer.
Whoo!
Oh!
Whoa!
Sire,
considering the sentiment
of the people,
I do not think it wise
to be out on the street.
Nonsense.
I love being out
among my people...
Taking whatever
I want.
Please, I barely have enough
to feed my family.
And that is too much.
My money.
My money.
Hmm. How agreeable.
Now whose turn?
A thousand pardons,
effendi.
Get away from me,
you leper!
Guards! Seize him!
This is no leper.
He's only a thief.
Mmm. Kill him.
Rishad:
Certainly, sire.
Oh!
The deliverer!
The evil brother!
Seize him!
[Sniffing]
Interesting entrance.
Yeah.
How do I explain that?
You may start
by telling me
your business
here in Basra.
Um, school field trip?
I think not.
Shall I kill him?
Yes.
No.
On second thought,
take them both
to the house
of pain.
Ooh. Good.
[Snaps]
Calvin: I knew
this was a bad idea.
Hey, is anyone
listening to me?
At last,
the lamp is finally
within my grasp.
So what is
this house of pain, anyway?
It is where
you will be one
with the rats.
Ha ha ha!
Seems our friend
has been kicked
by one
too many camels.
It's too crazy.
What is too crazy?
Nothing. I mean...
Get ready.
Hope this works.
Obi wan Kenobi on computer:
Luke, behind you!
Luke, use the force.
The force?
I'll explain later.
Move!
Out of my way!
Get out of my way!
Come here!
You're not from here.
Oh, you could tell, huh?
Calvin Fuller
from Reseda.
My friends call me
Ali baba.
Ali baba?
The great Ali baba?
Yes.
The man with a thousand
prices on his head.
After them!
I want them!
Come,
let's have some fun.
Out of my way,
you fools!
Get out! This way!
Stop! You there!
After them!
After them!
Lunch.
There they are!
Whoa!
Quick! After them!
I want them!
I want to kill them
myself!
I want to kill!
I want everything!
Don't just lie there!
Get after them,
you dogs!
Get out of my way!
Out! Out!
Look.
Hmm.
Now...
They must be here
somewhere.
[Bleating]
The guards are unusually
persistent today.
It's me.
They must know
I'm here to save Aladdin.
You?
How can you
save Aladdin?
You're just a boy.
A boy?
Uh-oh.
It's them!
After them!
Let's get out of here.
Come, Calvin.
Out of my way!
This way.
Out of my way!
Aah!
Quick.
Oof.
Oh.
Great. Dead end.
Aah!
Ooh.
Oh.
Aah.
Ooh!
After them!
After them,
you fools!
Follow me.
Whoa!
Whoa!
Aah!
That was close.
You did well.
Hurry.
Over this wall
lies our freedom.
I can't.
I have to go
to the palace.
The palace?
How else am I gonna get
to the cave of wonders?
The cave of wonders?
Right.
But first I really gotta
see the queen.
I said I need
to seethe queen,
not Bethe queen.
Only a sultan
or a handmaid
may enter
the royal quarters.
[Giggling]
Thank you,
achmed.
Girls, girls.
Hello, Ali.
Who's
your friend?
Why do I get the feeling
you've been here before?
How dare you frolic while
the palace is in mourning?
Have you no respect?
Why do you not bow?
[High-pitched voice]
Uh, my knees pop.
It's really
embarrassing.
I know every face
in this palace,
and I do not recognize
either of you ladies.
Whoa. Hold it.
Um, the genie
sent me here.
Genie?
Yeah. You know, big guy,
lots of smoke.
It's all true,
Princess.
Silence.
I did not address you.
Who are you?
I asked you
a question.
The deliverer.
Surely you cannot be
the deliverer.
Well, that's what
the genie told me.
Princess!
Why do you enter
my private quarters?
Pardon my intrusion.
I am looking for a thief
and a boy.
Look around.
I see only girls here.
Hello.
I have not seen you
before.
Oh, god.
Allow me
to introduce you
to our newest flower
in the garden...
Fatima.
She has just arrived
on the galley from...
[High-pitched voice]
Sheboygan.
Sheboygan.
Sheboygan?
Perhaps you would like
to get to know her better.
[Whispering]
What?
Just go.
[High-pitched voice]
Um, yes.
Yes, come. Come.
Go. You may use
my private quarters.
Mmm.
You smell divine.
Um, old spice.
Oh, please, just one kiss
for little Hassim?
Ok, but first close
those beady little eyes.
Hurry.
Hassim does not
like to wait.
Now, now,
you naughty boy.
Close those eyes.
Give it to me,
my little puppet.
Mmm.
You got it!
Unh!
Calvin:
He doesn't look so good.
He sleeps the sleep
of a thousand deaths.
You'd think after 5 or 6
he wouldn't care.
He is the one I spoke of,
mother.
The one who says
he is the deliverer.
Welcome.
We have waited a long time
for you to come.
Not him,
mother.
Him.
Ahem.
You?
I find it hard to believe
myself.
I find it impossible.
And yet, daughter,
the legend states
the deliverer
will come from a land
we least expect.
Calvin: It's a map.
Queen Jasmine:
To the cave of wonders.
What are, um,
these doohickeys?
This is where
you will find
the pieces
of the key.
The key?
Your journey will take you
far beyond the sea of sand
to the valley of death.
Death?
Surely the deliverer is not
afraid of his own death?
Well, his,no.
Mine, yeah.
Come, deliverer.
Time to start our quest.
Mother...
You're not going to allow
that thief to accompany us.
The journey
is far too dangerous
for the heir
to the throne.
What?
Ali baba will protect
the deliverer.
Yes, but who will protect
the deliverer from Ali baba?
Come.
You haven't much time.
Allah works
in mysterious ways.
If a boy
is to deliver us...
Then so be it.
Ali: Come, Calvin.
We have a long journey
ahead of us.
Your excellency.
Mmm.
Colorful entrance.
Oh.
Thank you, master.
Uh, the...
Don't tell me.
The prisoners
have escaped.
Well, yes.
I will call
the palace guard.
Rishad...
Yes, your magnificence?
Who knows of this?
No one.
That is how
it shall remain.
There you are.
I was beginning to wonder
how long I'd have to wait.
Camels.
Bitchin'.
These camels
belong to me.
Where they go,
I go.
Or you may try
the royal stables
down the road.
I'm sure the guards would
love to show you theirs.
I'll take this one.
Very well.
You shall ride
sirocco.
Oh, sirocco.
Like the car?
[Breaks wind]
No...
Like the wind.
Sire...
They flee
into the desert.
Your powers of observation
astound me.
I will go after them
and kill them.
Not today,
rishad.
It is all part
of my plan.
It is?
Only that witless boy
can get me the lamp.
And with it,
I shall be the most
powerful man on earth.
Zah! Zah!
Hey, Ali,
check it out!
Zah! Zah! See?
I almost got it.
Hey, cool hat.
When do I get one?
This turban
marks our clan.
It is not given freely.
It is earned.
Earned?
If you really want one of
those silly looking things,
wait until he's sleeping
and steal it from him.
That is how you join
a clan of thieves.
Here...
To give you strength.
Mmm.
Beef jerky.
Gecko.
Gecko?
You mean those
cute little lizards?
Ali:
Mmm.
Much better
than snake.
So the deliverer
does have human needs.
Look, Princess...
Isn't there something
else I can call you
besides Princess?
My name
is Sheherazade.
Um...
How about I just
call you Sherry?
You are the deliverer.
You may call me
what you wish.
Hey, Ali, in my time,
we call this a dead end.
In mine,
we call it home.
Behold...
The incredible power
of Ali baba.
Hey, wait a minute, Ali.
What is it?
I've always wanted
to do this.
Open sesame!
How could you know
the secret?
I'm the deliverer...
Remember?
Hey, just like
summer camp.
So this is where I meet
the 40 thieves, right?
Ha. 40 thieves.
I have only
my 3 brothers.
Ali! Brother,
you have returned!
Ali baba
and the 3 thieves?
Ali: Hummis,
kous kous,
and Bob.
Well, at least
he's not named after food.
Bob...
Short for kebab.
Gather your things,
my brothers,
for we ride on the greatest
adventure of a lifetime.
We are going to Aqaba
to look for girls?
No, we ride
for the cave of wonders.
Ahh! Then we are
after the treasure!
No. We ride to save
our beloved sultan...
Aladdin.
Huh?
Eh?
Just gather
our supplies.
Ali?
Yes, brother?
Aladdin is our enemy.
Why would we want
to save him?
We ride for treasure,
not for a sultan.
We will make our move
when the time is right.
Jasmine:
You asked to see me?
Ah, my queen.
You have never looked
more radiant.
Your perception
needs an education...
My husband's brother.
Indeed I am, but
I am also your sultan.
And a sultan has...Needs.
I'm not interested
in your needs, sir.
You will be soon.
This used to be
such a happy place.
I hate happy.
Ya-Hoo!
Ya-Hoo!
Calvin: An oasis. You think
they have a hot tub?
[Laughter]
For a lamp, it does not
burn very long.
Oh, it's not a lamp.
Here, I'll show you.
It's called a camera.
See? It takes
your picture.
It is a moment capturer.
[Singing]
[Whirring]
Problem gums.
Haven't you ever seen anyone
brush their teeth before?
I guess not.
[Snoring]
Ali?
What's wrong?
I thought I heard something,
but it was nothing.
Go back to sleep.
Ali?
You're not just in this
for the treasure, are you?
I give you my word, Calvin.
Oh! Hey!
I warned you about him.
Now what's wrong?
My father's life
is in the hands
of a thief and boy.
What could be right
about that?
Look, all I wanted to do
was go to a dance.
I didn't ask
to be here, either.
You mean you are here
against your will?
Well, I...
I thought I was.
I gotta climb that?
You are the deliverer.
The minaret of Allah.
But, brother, no one
has ever climbed it
and lived
to tell about it.
Shh. Shh. Someone's
got to do it.
Calvin,
it cannot be done.
My father has hidden
the key too well.
You'll need wings
to reach it.
Wings, right.
Really big wings.
Yeah. Really big wings.
Sherry, you're a genius!
May Allah
guide your path.
As long as it's
not straight down.
I'll see you
at the bottom.
Remember what I told you.
When we get close,
you reach out with this
and snag the key.
Calvin, are you sure
this will fly?
Hey, if it doesn't,
you can scatter my ashes
over the harem.
Aah!
My god,
we're going to die!
Calvin!
Whoa!
Oh, Calvin!
Help!
Oh, no! Aah!
Lean right!
[Gasping]
Hey, you can open
your eyes.
Oh, my goodness!
We're flying!
This is amazing!
We're actually flying!
Calvin, I've always
wanted to do this!
This is my dream!
I think
it's right over there!
Straight ahead.
All right.
Look, there it is.
That thing's bigger
than I thought.
Ok?
Let's see if we can't
get some altitude, huh?
It's the key!
You see it?
Yes, I see it.
Here. Get ready.
Take the stick.
I've got it. Ok.
Oh!
Ok, what?
Lean. We've got to
straighten out a bit.
All right.
You ready?
Yes.
Now!
I got it!
Pull it up!
We got it! Ha ha!
We got it!
Yes!
Yes!
All right!
That was bitchin'!
All right!
[Giggling]
Now we celebrate our victory
with a special treat.
What's that, Ali?
Dessert.
Those...those are bugs.
My brothers will be
supremely insulted
if you refuse.
Right.
[Crunch]
[Chuckling]
How does it taste,
Calvin of Reseda?
Like, um, chicken.
Slimy...white...chicken.
Princess?
I have no time
for your games.
We still have
a long way to go.
You like her, yes?
I don't know.
You should tell her.
Are you crazy?
She's...
Guys like me
don't get girls like her.
As long as you
think that way
it will be that way.
Yeah, but we're
too different.
We speak
different languages.
There is only one
language of the heart.
Speak to her in it,
and she will listen.
Calvin...
Calvin...
Calvin...
Aah! Oh, yuck!
Oh, gross.
It seems sirocco has
finally found his mate.
Oh, great.
Wait.
What?
You have much to learn
about our land.
Um, how deadly
is that thing?
You would not have had time
to scream in agony.
That long, huh?
[Giggling]
What are you laughing at?
He just saved my life.
But how do you know he did
not put it there himself?
Calvin: That's
a big sandbox.
Ali: It is
the sea of sand.
No food, no water,
no living thing
until the other side.
What's on
the other side?
The valley of death.
Great.
Water.
Water.
Haagen Dazs.
Haagen Dazs.
Do you see that?
What?
I'll race you. Zah!
Calvin, no!
Zah!
Calvin, stop!
Stop! It's not real!
Oh, I don't care!
I got to have a whopper!
[Brays]
Sherry: Zah!
Let's go, sirocco.
Zah!
Zah!
Oh! Uhh!
Ohh.
Are you all right?
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
I could've sworn it was
right over there by that dune.
There is nothing.
The desert plays tricks
on your mind.
Oh, you mean a mirage?
Uh-huh.
So that's not
a hurricane, right?
[Wind blowing]
Oh, by Allah.
Calvin!
Calvin, get down!
It's too late!
Calvin!
Don't leave me!
Sherry!
Calvin, where
are you going?
Where's Ali?
Calvin, don't leave me!
[Wind howling]
Help!
Be careful, Calvin!
Help!
Help me!
Calvin: Sherry?
Yes?
Is that your hand?
No.
[Blows]
[Blows]
[Coughs]
[Laughs]
[Laughs]
[Tosses]
[Camels bray]
Come on.
We got to find Ali.
Calvin: Do you see
anybody?
They got to be here
somewhere.
There!
There they are!
I got an idea.
Come on.
Let's go.
Let's rock.
Ha ha!
Aah! Aah!
Sherry: Aah!
Ha ha!
Whoo!
Whoo!
You all right?
My brothers.
Hurry. Help them.
Sherry: Your riding has
much improved, Calvin.
Yeah, I can almost
keep up.
Sherry?
Yes?
Do you have a boyfriend?
If you mean a prince,
I have not yet met one
who is my equal.
In other words, no.
And yourself?
How many are
in your harem?
My harem?
I wish.
I can't even get a date
to the dance.
A date?
But why would you dance
with a date?
No, no, I...I mean...
I haven't met anyone,
either.
Oh, you're alone.
I know what that's like.
But you're a Princess.
Everybody wants
to go out with you.
Don't they?
[Clicks tongue]
Please.
Please wake up.
Return to us
before it's too late.
Luxor: You rise early,
my queen.
Just as my dear brother
remains...
Unrisen.
I still have hope.
And I grow impatient.
I will never
forsake him.
A word of advice, my nearly
departed brother's wife...
Rule with me
or die with my enemies.
Don't tell me...
The valley of death.
We'll make camp here
and begin our search
at first light.
Why must we wait,
thief?
It is unwise to disturb
the dead at night.
Scissors cuts paper.
What are scissors?
It's like 2 knives.
They kind of hin...
[Distant howling]
Do you hear that?
It seems to be
calling your name.
Oh, really?
Like I know anyone
in the valley of death.
We must follow it.
Yeah, sure...
First thing in the morning.
Calvin.
I know the thief
has no courage,
but I hope the deliverer
is not counted with him.
All right, I'm with you.
[Wind blows]
Calvin:
What is this place?
It's the final home for
those who die in battle.
Some say there's an army
of ghostly warriors
that guard the dead.
Great. 1,001 nights
of the living dead.
[Camel breaks wind]
Sirocco...
What are you doing here?
He misses you.
All right.
Come on.
That's it.
What's it?
The moon.
It's just like
the amulet, see?
[Moaning]
Come on. The sound's
coming from over here.
[Moaning]
Here.
Hold this.
Sherry: The key.
Uhh!
[Thunder]
What's that?
[Neighing]
The guardians of the dead.
New rule...
Never take jewelry
off a dead guy.
Sherry: Oh, my gosh!
Uhh!
Fire gets them?
Sherry: They're coming back!
Come on. There's
still 2 left.
They're coming back,
Calvin!
Come on.
I've got
an idea.
[Sirocco brays]
Sirocco, now!
[Breaks wind]
Sherry: It worked!
[Sirocco brays]
Maybe you are
the deliverer.
You all right?
I was making a wish.
Really?
Can you tell me, or...
Do you have
to keep it a secret
for it to come true?
No, I may share it with you,
because it will never
come true.
Remember when you asked me
if I had a boyfriend?
Yeah.
That was
pretty lame, huh?
I was just a kid then.
That was yesterday.
Well, yesterday
and 1,200 years.
It matters not.
Your question
was no more lame
than my reply.
Calvin...
Yeah?
Why could you not
have been a prince?
Ali: Are you sure
this is the way?
Calvin: That's what
the map says.
We're going to make it,
Sherry.
Calvin: It's got to be
around here somewhere.
I just hope
we're not too late.
This is it.
Now what?
The key?
Oh, yeah. Right.
[Rumbling]
Did I do that?
Fulfill your destiny.
Yeah!
[Excited chatter]
Oh, my god!
Calvin, there.
By all the grains of sand
in all the deserts
of the world...
Hey, Ali...
Remember why we're here?
Of course, Calvin.
How could I forget?
It is time, my brothers.
[Others laugh]
[Lava bubbling]
Calvin: Ali, no!
A thousand pardons,
Calvin...
But here is
where we must part.
You can't do this.
You gave me your word.
You have fulfilled
your destiny.
It is time for me
to fulfill mine.
You were right.
It matters not.
Rub the lamp.
The genie
can help us.
He can't.
His powers don't work
in the cave of wonders.
What is it, brother?
[Sighs]
It is the boy.
Leave if you must,
brothers...
But I cannot.
We are united
in this, brother.
Bob: Wherever you go,
we go.
There will be
other treasures.
There's no way
out of here.
There's gotta be.
I will never
save my father.
We'll never get
out of here.
Yeah, we will.
What is it?
Fishing line.
300-pound test.
Here.
I use it
to tie pizzas
to my bike,
like this.
What's that?
Swiss army knife.
[Gasp]
Chicks dig 'em.
300-pound test...
Fishing line...
Pizza?
You come from
very interesting times.
It's a laugh a minute.
Come on.
The crowd's on their feet.
Fuller's going for 3.
He's up...
He shoots...He scores!
Yes! Nothing but net.
Impossible.
That's why I'm here,
to make the impossible
possible.
Hold on.
Calvin, uh...
Let's go.
Aah!
Whoo!
That was incredible.
You are finer
than any prince,
Calvin Fuller,
and greater
than any king.
Let's go get your dad.
Uhh!
[Gasp]
Calvin: Luxor.
The deliverer.
How nice
to see you again.
Thank you
for the lamp.
I was wrong, Calvin.
Forgive me.
So you can
betray us again?
As usual, Princess,
you are wrong.
They were on their way
to save you.
Can't think why.
Let go of me.
Calvin!
Let her go, Luxor.
She is no longer
your concern.
At last...
The genie is mine!
A thousand pardons,
Calvin.
10,000 pardons,
Calvin.
100,000?
Yes, exactly.
Search the cavern.
See if there's
any way out of here.
Ali...
You planned it
all along, didn't you?
You were just in it
for the treasure.
I've dreamed
of this treasure
my entire life,
and now I have it.
All of it.
And it pleases me not.
[Throws coins into chest]
Is it true that...
You were coming back
to warn us?
Or was that just
a mirage, too?
My head told me
to forget you,
but my heart
would not allow it.
Before you came,
I was nothing.
A thief...
And I was
glad in it.
But you raised me on
a cloud of courage.
You spoke of me
as if I was
some great warrior.
You called me
a hero.
I have spent
a lifetime running.
That is what
makes a good thief,
and I am the best.
Hey...
Anyone can run.
I ought to know.
But it takes a hero
to stand up
and face his fears.
I am no hero.
Yeah, you are.
You just don't know it yet.
Ali! Ali!
We found
the passage!
Come!
Let's go.
Looks like a way out.
Over there.
Do you hear water?
[Screaming]
Calvin: Sirocco!
Let's go save
the Princess.
Ok, ok, ok. I'm coming.
Keep your shorts on.
Yo.
Oh...great.
More bad news.
Genie...
Make me
the most powerful man
in the world.
Done.
Make me the richest man
in the world.
Done.
Well?
Well what?
Your third wish.
How about a vacation?
Herculaneum?
Pompeii?
I heard Vesuvius was hot.
I think I'll keep it.
[Door creaks]
Back in the lamp.
[Groans]
Your
worshipfulness?
Yes?
The palace
is filled
with gold
and jewels.
And?
And...
All the leaders
of all the lands
are here,
begging to pledge
their allegiance to you.
I want you to do
something for me.
Anything, your most
magnificent excellence.
Build a gallows.
A beheading?
My favorite holiday.
Who is the guest
of honor?
The Princess.
[Laughing]
[Camel brays]
You ready to go, Ali?
Something
is missing.
Yeah, about
100 more men.
No, it's not that.
How can you ride
with us
looking like someone
from Reseda?
There.
With this, you are
truly our brother.
Now we are Ali baba
and the 4thieves.
[Cheering]
Cool.
[Shouting]
Today I wipe the last trace
of my brother
from the face
of this earth.
Wait.
Yes?
You win.
Free my daughter,
and I will consent
to rule by your side.
I no longer
need you, madam.
I have the lamp.
[Crowd gasps]
For crimes
against the kingdom...
For high treason...
For consorting
with the enemy...
For willfulness
and disobedience...
For stealing
the royal camels...
[Camel
breaks wind]
Ew!eww!
Luxor Al Hasred,
supreme ruler
of the universe,
does hereby proclaim
Princess Sheherazade
a traitor.
The sentence is...
Death.
I never liked you.
[Brays]
Do something.
I knew you'd come.
Of course.
Rishad: Guards!
After them!
Let's go.
My toes.
Ohh.
Master,
they're escaping.
Find them...
And kill them!
After them! They're
getting away! Come on!
Go! Move!
Go! Move!
Get them! Get them!
Do not let them get away!
Thank you, Ali baba.
I'm forever
your servant.
We will save
your father,
or we will
die trying.
And I was worried about
asking a girl to dance.
Let's go.
Hey, back there...
What did you whisper
in sirocco's ear?
I told him I would
light the next one.
[Gasp]
Well?
The passage
is heavily guarded.
Then we'll have to
go in another way.
There is no other way.
[Donkey braying]
Calvin: Sherry...
What's that?
A trader with oil
for the palace. Why?
Think it's time to do
a little trading of our own.
Die, infidel.
Heh heh heh.
Oil for the supreme
ruler of the universe.
Hurry. Time's wasting.
Yeah.
Yeah.
[Whistles]
Let's go.
I'll eat it
on the way.
[Gasp]
Sorry, boys.
Kitchen's closed.
[Sniffs]
Old spice?
Oh, no.
Get him!
[Yelling]
Heh heh heh heh.
Huh?
Uhh.
Aah!
Strike!
Aah! Aah!
Ha ha!
Kick him!
Good shot.
Shall we?
Let's go.
Come on!
[Chuckling]
This is it,
the door to Luxor's tower.
Any chance of you guys
giving up peacefully?
Go! Rrr!
I guess not.
Get the lamp.
We'll hold them off.
Sir, we are defeated!
Be quiet,
you miserable worm.
Oh, now what?
Genie, I command you,
kill the deliverer.
Why do you
laugh at me?
That was your third wish,
but you're not
gonna get it.
Genies can't kill.
Genie rules.
Next time...
Read the manual.
I don't have the boy...
But I still have you,
and that means
Aladdin will die.
They'll never
get the lamp.
Sire, please
take me with you!
You may have saved
the Princess,
but you will
never save Aladdin.
Hurry!
He's getting away!
He has the lamp!
Without it,
my father will die!
We must stop him!
How?
I know.
A magic carpet?
Hurry!
Well, how do you
start this thing?
You command it.
Giddyup.
Not again.
[Horse neighs]
[Whistles]
Ha ha.
Where is that boy?
Ohh!
Uh-oh.
Uhh!
Give me back
my lamp.
Whoa. Are you nuts?
Possibly.
You miserable specimen.
You've ruined
everything.
Does that hurt?
I never want to
forget this moment.
You won't.
Aah!
[Screaming]
Aah!
Oh, no.
[Breaks wind]
Ohh.
Mother.
You're safe.
Yo, Calvin.
Good to see you, homes.
You made it,
and you were worried
you weren't good enough.
Look at you.
[Sniff sniff]
When was the last time
you changed that shirt?
Hey, it wasn't exactly
a 3-hour tour, ok?
All right, all right.
Shake it out.
The important thing
is you did it,
and you did it well.
I thought I’d
never see you again.
Father.
Daughter.
[Groaning]
Much has happened.
Don't ask.
I do not know
who you are,
and yet I feel...
We've been friends
for eternity.
You slept
through most of it.
The deliverer.
The deliverer.
Calvin Fuller,
sir,
from Reseda.
Thank you,
Calvin Fuller,
for bringing
us all together.
Ali baba, sire.
Once a thief,
now at your service.
Thank you, Ali baba.
Come. Our people
are waiting.
Hey. Don't everybody
thank me at once.
[Cheering]
It is time?
I have to go home,
Sherry.
Then it is true?
You are leaving us?
Yeah.
Every hero ought to
have one of these.
Swiss army knife.
Chicks dig 'em.
Oh.
Thank you, brother.
I will never forget you.
I would give you
my word,
but what good
is the word of a thief?
Very good.
I thought you
could use this.
I'll never forget you.
No matter where...
No matter when...
I will find you.
Calvin, my boy!
I am at your disposal
to take you anywhere
that you want at any time.
You want to see
the pyramids go up,
you got it.
What about the ice age?
It's awesome.
What do you think?
I hear Reseda is nice
this time of year.
Yeah.
Yee-ha!
Very funny,
achmed.
Elliot.
Fuller.
Hey, um,
nice zit.
Say hello to the afterlife.
[Groans]
Hey, Elliot, can I
borrow your car tonight?
Gee, thanks.
Go on, Calvin.
Do the right thing.
Thanks, Charley.
I will.
Hey, Valery, look, um,
about tonight...
You're never
gonna forget it.
Look, Valery....
That 'vette
out there, it...
It's not mine.
Not yours?
Nope.
Then you can forget
about tonight.
That's what I thought.
Hey, Charley.
Give those back to Elliot
when he wakes up.
You don't want to
go to the dance
in that old thing.
Sherry!
Ohh.
What are you
doing here?
Let's just say
you're my first wish.
First? What about
the rest?
You'll see.