9 Kere Leyla (2020) - full transcript

NETFLIX PRESENTS

The whole place is a big bloodbath
all over again.

The discovery of murder.

Come to think of it, some guy discovered
how to commit murder.

He killed his brother.

Some discovery!

All they know is how to kill.

If there was no one left to kill,
they'd kill themselves...

whereas women discovered love.

What did men do?

Love is not enough for them.



They must trick a woman into believing
they would die for her

just to prove themselves.

"I loved her a lot, so I killed her."

"She didn't love me, so I killed her."
"She loved someone else, so I killed her."

Love should not lead to murder
but only to making love.

And how!

Oh dear. I got so used to death
that I don't feel sad anymore.

But being forgotten hurts.

Nobody remembers my name.

My name is Lilith.

Lilith.

The ginger witch.

The first woman. The one before Eve.

The serpent's servant.



The hideous, home-wrecker, jealous,
woman-hater, man-eater, female spider.

Do I look like that?

I was Adam's first wife,

but I became humankind's first witch.

Look at those paintings and manuscripts.

They are all about Adam's heroic deeds.

Nobody asked me what I did.

Adam made the world a better place,
and I haunted the women, right?

Get out of here!

This is a man's world.

It was me who invented writing.

I was the first to learn
and teach how to farm.

I've domesticated animals,
invented the wheel.

To hell with the "women make homes" fable.

They didn't know how to build houses.

Let's get right down to the other issue.

I remember the moment
we squirmed out of the mud.

We were bewildered and naked.

Everything was so beautiful!

Until I said that I would not yield.

What happened next?

I still had a fire burning in me.

Shouldn't I have quenched it?

I've dried up seven faucets.

Some men are indeed keepers.

So I'll have to try again...

again and again and again,

until I find my deepest desire.

Your deepest desire,
that's what you have to find.

I'm not telling you just as your therapist
but also as your friend.

NERGIS
MARRIAGE COUNSELOR

Mrs. Leyla, what is your deepest desire?

What could my deepest desire possibly be?

-My Adem, of course.
-Very interesting.

What does Mr. Adem mean to you?

ADEM EVLIYAOGLU
ARCHAEOLOGIST

LEYLA EVLIYAOGLU
HOUSEWIFE

He's my life.

I freak out that he might
drop dead right here--

What makes... What?
What makes you say that?

Why talk about death? Totally irrelevant.

You see how he panics instantly?
He simply can't take care of himself.

If I left him alone for two weeks,
he'd end up dead--

Why dead? Come on.

Mr. Adem, this fear of death
comes out in the open each time we talk.

This fear of death restricts your life.
Since hunter societies...

He's no hunter. Let me explain.

When Adem was a child, his uncle
fell on top of him from the balcony.

Yes, and as a result of this...

-Trauma.
-Nice. Trauma.

This is the result of that trauma.

Uncle...

-I understand.
-Well, you can't. It was my great uncle.

-Whatever.
-He was huge.

Nobody understands.

Thanks to modern science,
people can live up to 150 years.

-Yeah, right.
-Those with money, of course.

Well, praise be, you got plenty.

Sorry for interrupting,
but Adem has nothing to do with money.

The mansion,
the bank accounts, the safe deposit...

He doesn't deal with all that.
It's all under my control.

These are all earthly things to him.

Oh, honey, you didn't eat all day.
You should eat something, dear.

Here, eat this.

-I don't want it.
-Your stomach acid...

I don't want any. I don't eat breakfast.

An apple is enough.

I'm just bored of marriage.

So, you mean, you won't marry ever again?

Well...

I'm still young.

Let's say

some young, beautiful,

light skinned, smart, flirty girl
with pink lips seduces you.

Adem, watch it. It's a trick question.

Of course, all old men...
I mean, mature men have some fantasies.

Speaking of fantasies,
how is Mr. Adem in bed?

This is the trick question.

First of all,
Adem and I married out of love.

And, I mean, making love, you know...

If only the walls
of the mansion could talk.

One day, he felt like it again
and came home early from work.

He was young and lively back then.

-Gosh, Mrs. Leyla.
-Well, he just wouldn't stop.

-Well, he shouldn't stop.
-I don't want to go into detail.

-He shouldn't stop.
-Seems you can't stop either.

He shouldn't stop.

Don't stop! Don't!

Raspberry chocolate.

What?

You taste like raspberry chocolate.

I wanted to say that,
but can't finish a sentence.

Adem?

Don't you like my nose?

I love it.

You had two nose jobs and I loved both.

Yes, I have a beautiful nose indeed.

It's beautiful.

Maybe you don't love my soul.

Why shouldn't I, my cherry pie?

Your soul is as beautiful as your nose.

-It's my sign then.
-Leo. Such a good sign.

If you don't like it,
we'll get you a new one.

What is it that you don't like about me?
Obviously, something is missing.

I like everything about you, my red apple.

You don't.

You know what? Let's wait for Leyla here.

She could tell
what you don't like about me.

I told you that I would find a way,
my sweet pudding.

Yes, but you didn't.

Maybe Leyla will find a way.

Maybe you should counsel us less.

Say, "It's no good."

"Give him half of the property
and divorce him."

You say that.
Should I go and tell her that?

Oh, your guests are here,
and you're still in bed.

It's auction day.

If I were someone else...

We need to get up.

...would I love myself?

Sure I would. I would be me after all.

Everybody loves me.

For example, Haris.

Harris is here again?

-Haris.
-Harris.

Harris.

HARIS ADIVAR
LAWYER

How are you? Fine, I hope.

FARUK GARIPOGLU
MAHDUM'S FOLLOWER

HARUN GARIPOGLU
MAHDUM'S FOLLOWER

Where do you think you're going?
Just wait. Wait.

Greetings, Mr. Mahdum.

What? Stop that. This is no good.

Is this necessary?

It's a matter of principle.

Come over to my house when you have time.

When I'm not home, please.

MAHDUM AKSAMAN
COLLECTOR

ARTIFACT SPECIALIST
GRIEVING SON

My guys here

will give you my two-volume book
My Principles and Zen.

You'll read it twice.

Don't read it three times. Twice is good.

-How are you?
-I'm fine.

You and your obsession with two.

Sir...

the sales permit
for Mr. Adem's collection.

This is the list. Signature.

If you could just sign...

Should I read this?

Yes. Not reading is the plight of our age.

You don't know Mr. Adem.
It's your first time working with him.

He would write "Ancient Rome" here
and then the artifact...

turns out to be fake.

-Let's go by the book.
-Where's Mr. Adem?

At home, of course. What a ruffian!

Adem?

Me and Haris,
what kind of a couple would we be?

No good at all, my Italian compote.

This is where you say,
"I should talk with Leyla."

Don't even think about it.

I don't like to think.
It's not good for my brain.

I feel depressed when I think
about anything except myself.

I don't like getting depressed.
I tense up and it's not good for my skin.

Don't get depressed, honey.

My maple syrup,
we're going to get married instantly...

as soon as I divorce.

I mean, when Leyla
accepts the divorce. Pretty soon.

She doesn't want a divorce.
It's complicated.

There's so much property.

Alright, Adem!
This has dragged on for too long.

I don't like things to drag on.

Give me some time.
I'll handle this, my maple syrup.

Leyla.

Leyla is here. Leyla. Hurry.

Hurry. Get up.

Adem?

Leyla?

Adem?

-Adem?
-Leyla!

I can explain... Probably.

I can explain, I will.

Explain what exactly?

Well...

-I--
-What is there to explain?

You should've told me
you had a private session at home.

I wouldn't have interrupted.

I was prancing around and dancing.

Feels like I'm putting my own marriage
on the line here.

-Nergis was here to--
-To save our marriage, of course.

Yes! This looks so odd, right?

Almost as if Mr. Adem and I
were doing weird stuff upstairs

and you just walked in on us.

The sanction... Suction...

Oh, you have an auction.

What are you waiting for? Get going.

-Come on.
-Let's go. Yeah.

Darling, please don't buy anything silly
and bring it home.

-I won't. Alright.
-I don't want those things.

Miss Nergis, this way if you please.

-Yes.
-Mr. Adem?

Yes?

In the backyard.

Yes. Backyard.

I told you to bring two pairs of these.

Go and get one more pair.

The Lilith Manuscript.

Lilith Manuscript.

Where did Adem dig this up?

Mr. Mahdum, are you talking to yourself
or did you ask a question?

Would you like to join the auction, Harun?

I don't want to. Harun, would you?

He doesn't want to either.

-Oh, yes, he is...
-You get confused.

My socioeconomic status won't allow it.

I could raise the bid as a joke
and end up with the item.

-That would be bad.
-Listen to me.

A lousy mug was sold for five--

Look at me!

When... this Lilith Manuscript
is opened to bidding...

enter the auction,

bid up if necessary and buy this.
Alright?

I've been chasing this for 20 years.

Got it? I'll pay.

-Is that clear?
-Yes.

-Raise your right hand.
-Right hand.

-Remember, your right hand.
-Right hand.

-Go and get ready.
-Fine.

-Here are the letters of attorney.
-Come, dear.

Let me see.

-What did he buy?
-Land.

This time, it's a rational investment.
Very unexpected of Adem.

-That's too expensive, right?
-It is.

It's kind of an archaeological site.

I figured he'll do excavations, dig out
whatever he can and then we'll sell it.

Good. Still, let me know
about such investments beforehand.

He shouldn't have his own way.

I keep telling him but each time he says,
"Haris, I'll fire you."

He's a jerk.

You fight like cats and dogs
but can't be apart.

Honey, him and I are like...

-Like what? An apple?
-Worm... Apple worm and...

-Caterpillar?
-Forget it.

Anyway, he's just a jerk!

Just divorce him.

We'll kick him out without paying a dime.

No way. You share everything in marriage.

-Have some. Fresh out of the oven.
-I didn't have breakfast.

Mr. Mahdum, one last thing.
You're going to pay for what I buy, right?

I just wanted to be clear on that.

Oh, you're the one
who set up this auction.

The donations are so nice.
It's really going to make history.

-Congratulations.
-Want some?

-No, thanks.
-I think you do.

Trust me, they are delicious. Have one.

They are delicious and I...
Please, have one.

Since you love it, you should eat.

Let me help you. Your hands are full.

I don't know what's in it but...

You're a movie maker. You must be hungry.

-One more.
-Because I won't eat any.

Got it? So, you should eat them!
Got it? I won't eat!

Fucking rococo.

Mate? What happened?

911? Someone's choking.

Yes, we need an ambulance, please.

Come on, it's alright.

You are beautiful.

I swear.

Thank you.

But... tell me something I don't know.

Ladybugs can fly at 60 km/h.

If you were a pirate and me a parrot...

would you prefer
that I land on this shoulder or this one?

Adem would rip off your wings.

What's taking him so long?
What time is it?

Adem bought this.

Adem says that just the minute hand
is worth your monthly salary.

Mr. Adem? Adem said that?

I know what to do to him.

I was just wondering if you and I

could meet at some cozy place...

under different conditions?

I'll have to ask Adem about that.

Adem?

Adem.

That Adem...

AMBULANCE

Are you alright?

Look at me. Open your eyes.

Buddy?

You're lucky we have medical training.

HIZIR
MEDICALLY TRAINED, FULLY VACCINATED

ILYAS B.
MEDICALLY TRAINED, NOT FULLY VACCINATED

Who's the douche who called 911?

He's choking. And you hit me!

So now we're to blame, huh?

Any pre-existing conditions?

He's suffocating. That's his condition!

The more you can tell us about him
the better.

-Tell us his pre-existing conditions.
-He's choking. That's it!

He's choking! Just take a look!

Excuse me.

It's better this way.

What were you doing inside?
Why were you in there?

I explained to her
how you squander away your fortune.

What do you care about my fortune?
Are you a fortune hater?

Love is the one and only fortune.

If you keep going like this,
you'll end up stone broke, dear Adem.

-You're lucky to have Leyla.
-What do you care? I'll fire you.

-No, you can't.
-Why can't I?

You and I are like wind energy and...

What? We are what? Tell me.

I can't find the right word for you.

Since I'm not an unqualified upstart
like you.

Excuse me, I have to start the auction.

I'm going to fire you in such a way

that they will teach it
in economics departments.

I'm going to ignore you in such a way
that you'll doubt your own existence,

you waste of oxygen, third wheel,

waste of space on the planet.

I'm deeply sorry.

As a lawyer who holds the Foundation
of Turkish Cinema Center very dear,

I would like to thank Mr. Adem
for his donations

and for opening his backyard to us.

Yet I won't thank him too much.

He has set up too few heaters.
He's being a little stingy here.

And many thanks to our cinema workers.
Bon appétit.

Bon appétit.

I hope that today's donations…

will support the film industry workers
to make new feature films.

Our special thanks go to...

the person who organized this event,
an expert in the history of archaeology,

a real collector.

His books have been translated
into 22 languages and I repeat,

for the second time, his books
have been translated into 22 languages,

Mr. Mahdum.

Let's start right away.

Arts and crafts and charity

have again brought us together,
the finest people on earth.

Faruk, where are you?

Our first item is...

a bitten apple,
symbolizing Eve's expulsion from Paradise.

The artist is unknown,

but all the scientific tests show
that it was made 300, 500 years ago.

It may have been bitten last week.

Any bidders?

Yes! Sold!

-Next item.
-I wanted to bid.

I've kept asking the whole time!

Next! And now we have this horse head.

Any bidders? Yes. Sold.

The next item is called
Earth Caught Between Two Arrows.

Who wants to buy it?

Sold, mate. Yes. Next.

Yes.

Next one is the Lilith Manuscript.

The ginger woman. So nice.

This is such an important artifact...

that I can't lower my right hand.

I'm sure that Mr. Faruk
would be very interested in this.

You have to let go of the dead.

May he rest in peace. It's a mortal world.

May he rest in peace. I should go.

-Thanks.
-Why can't I get more screen time?

Sir, just sit and finish your coffee.

I should go. I have things to do. Thanks.

The manuscript of the first woman,
namely Lilith.

It's such a special item that…

$10,000.

-...I can't lower my hand.
-$15,000.

Faruk would be interested--

$15,500.

Damn. Mr. Faruk, would you like to bid?

$30,000.

-Oh, Adem!
-$30,000 was the last bid.

What's next? Maybe Faruk will bid higher.

-$30,250.
-$50,000.

We have $50,000.

Mr. Faruk, you might want to bid.

$50,050.

-$100,000.
-Oh, Adem!

And sold, with pleasure.

Give Mr. Adem two sets of my book
Frustration and Zen. Both volumes.

He needs medical attention,
but he wants to go.

Is he dead?

Don't think about your uncle. Don't!

Persuasion, it's the sole solution

It's persuasion to the death

Persuasion, it's the sole solution
It's persuasion to the death

But I'm afraid of death.

It's persuasion to the death

Stop the music, please!

-What's up, dude?
-Who the hell are you?

Why do you all look like me?

We're the inside of your mind.

When you were little,
you saw horses when you fainted.

We're like an upgraded version.

I'm the Devil Adem.

He is the lesser devil.

This is Wussy Adem.

-I'm a delicate soul.
-You mean that I have a woman in me?

-That's not relevant.
-A wussy Adem in me?

Some kind of repressed emotions?

The subject at hand is,
"How can I get rid of my wife?"

I say she should die.

You mean...

-I have a killer in me?
-Dude.

If everyone who committed murder
was a killer...

-I can't believe it. No way.
-You're funny.

-Yes way.
-She could die.

Change, change
The right time for change

She won't divorce
We need to find a way

She could fall, die, break

Finally, Adem will get a break

Persuasion, it's the sole solution

It's persuasion to the death

Persuasion, it's the sole solution

It's persuasion to the death

Persuasion, it's the sole solution

And if persuasion brings you to no end
The only solution is an accident

You're telling me
that my wife should die in an accident.

Convince her to die
No way

Try again, if you fail
Murder

Convince her to fall
She won't fall for that

So push her then

Murder
Make it look like an accident

She won't go for that
She'll go in the end

Make it look like an accident

Accident
Make it look like an accident

Yes, dude
Make it look like an accident

Accident
Make it look like an accident

It's best
If you make it look like an accident

It's alright
If you make it look like an accident

Accident, make it look like an accident

Make it look like an accident.

You don't shock an unconscious man!

Are you insane?

Like an accident.

Wait. He's coming around.

Well, I saw the dead guy and...

It's very common to be scared.

Fear of dead people is quite normal.

It's not fear, actually.
My granduncle fell on top of me.

I don't like to bend over.
Sit him upright.

Ilyas...

What a pity that he's dead.

-What if I died? I'm glad I did not.
-You were going to drive me home. Can you?

Should I take a cab?

Oh, no.

I will give you a ride, Miss Nergis.

I have to tell you something.
Something important happened. Come.

-I was about to come--
-I'll get it from you, Adem.

-An accident happened--
-It's a family heirloom. Nobody listens.

Everyone is a maniac, a maniac.
Twice the maniac!

-Does that also include me?
-Whoa!

Coffee?

My sweet caramel,
you want me to get divorced, right?

Yes!

What if I don't get divorced
but Leyla dies and then we...

Yeah, right. We'll wait for 30 years.

I'll marry Haris and have two kids.
No breastfeeding. My tits would get saggy.

What if she had a little home accident?
Then, it would be just you and me.

Me and you... Me first.

-That makes me a home-wrecker.
-Let's go home and make love.

-Where did that come from?
-It's my first murder. I'm aroused.

Why wait till home?

It's funny, right?

It is.

All the history of civilization
wasted on ironing our clothes.

That's right.

It was a man who invented the iron.

How come women ended up doing it?

Yes, right.

-That...
-Yes?

The music.

-Why don't you get a maid?
-A maid?

Yes.

A maid?

No way, dear.
I won't let anyone touch your stuff.

-Leyla.
-Yes?

I want to break up.

What did you say?

Break... Turn off that music!

I can't hear myself think.

We have to split up.

Why, honey? Is someone chasing us?

They say that in movies.
"Let's split up. We're being followed."

-That's why.
-I don't love you anymore.

Adem, you're going through andropause.

It's not andropause.

The foundation of marriage
is property, dear.

Wealthy people like us don't break up
over things like andropause.

Fine, you asked for it.

Come on, let me tuck you in.
Get some rest. Come on.

You've gone through a lot lately.
Let's go to bed.

Come, honey. Watch it.

Adem, honey.
You're pushing Haris too much.

-Harris.
-He came to me and complained.

I say we should find a beautiful,
nice, innocent girl and get him wed.

He's goofy but a nice guy.

For example, Nergis.

-How would that be?
-Hell no!

Whoa! Well done!

I faint when I see dead people.

You're the man! Way to go!

My man!

Thanks.

She should be dead, right?

You're vicious
Unconscientious

You hypocrite
Degenerate

All you care about is six and more six

Woman killer
You are toxic

Adem, you are a prick
A prick you are

May your demons
Take your soul to a hellhole

All you care about is six and more six

Why do you even exist?

Six and six with young ladies

-More ladies, more six and six
-Hey, mates!

Six and six with Nergis

And more six with Leyla...

-Let me kiss you.
-Graceless.

Six and six with young ladies

Six and six

What are you doing here?
Where are the Adems?

He's still in shock.

Think of us as a public service.

Are you nuts?

Forget about our nuts.

Your wife is passing away.

She's as good as dead.
If we chat more, she'll die for sure.

Oh no!
Sit, tell me everything from the start.

Speak clearly. I don't quite understand.
I haven't recovered yet.

-What happened?
-She fell. I'm leaving.

Don't go. Just explain it to me.

I didn't get it right.

AMBULANCE

Look at this beauty!

She's like a doll.

Get her mummified, put her in your house,
and then watch her all day.

In the name of God.

Six and six with young ladies

More ladies, more six and six

Six and...

-Mr. Adem, you're very lucky!
-Why are you here?

-I was going to come to the hospital.
-Mrs. Leyla is alive!

Oh, Leyla is back.

Oh dear. He's in shock again, see?

He's all torn up with sorrow.

Leyla, when you fell...

-I thought you were... And I fainted.
-Just let me sit here, Adem.

-Just as I was falling...
-I couldn't catch you.

Yes, you couldn't. As I was falling...

I don't know how, but somehow,

I held onto something
that slowed my fall.

So, I kept holding on till the last step
and twisted my ankle there.

And I also hit my head.
I woke up in the ambulance.

-Thank God, they took me in...
-Yes.

That's where I woke up.
I'm fine, thank God.

Medical science can be wrong,
but she's definitely alive.

Yes, I said, "Adem must be worried sick.
Take me home."

But they checked me from head to toe.
There's nothing to worry about.

-Good.
-Oh, honey.

He's put together everything
that would remind him of me

to put them away.

Because they remind me of you.

DARLING

I'm so sorry. I don't like to take calls
during a session but...

I'm in the middle of a session.
Is it urgent?

Fine, I'm listening.

The ambulance brought her back.

So, you failed.

We'll talk later.

-What were we saying?
-I just can't thank you enough.

Thanks to you,
I made peace with my husband,

and we fell in love again.

I love my wife
as much as I did on day one.

You two have to divorce.

See how he looks at me?

If I flirted with him,
he would try to kill you.

Heaven forbid he failed,
he is a man after all,

and you might end up crippled.

Well, this is my professional opinion.

-How come?
-Get divorced.

Well, if she says so... it must be true.

I don't know.

Thanks for accepting my invitation
on such short notice, Mr. Adem.

Invitation?

I see.

Such accidents can happen to anyone.

I want the Lilith Manuscript
that you bought yesterday.

Money is no issue here.

I descend from an established family.

It is technically ours.

-What do you mean by "family"?
-Let me put it like this.

Anything that belongs to Lilith...

is mine.

I see.

She's like a mother to me.

Like my... Like a... mother.

I don't get it, but...

I won't sell.

I don't feel like selling.

Why did you have me brought over?

Well...

in case you file a complaint,

you wouldn't be able to tell anyone
about my whereabouts.

-Makes sense.
-It does, right?

-What's all that in those showcases?
-Those are logs.

-As our ancestors said--
-Shut up, idiot! Ignorant fool.

It's because of you we're in this mess.

The toxic journey of love.

These are crossties.
Not simple "logs" as that idiot said.

They were taken from railroads
and are 100 to 150 years old.

Inside a showcase?

They are toxic.

Their surface is treated with creosote.
If you breathe long enough next to them...

What would happen?

You'll die.

Don't be stupid.
Don't you know what toxic is?

Are you pulling my leg?

Are those for sale?

If... If you want, I can...

have some stolen, taken for you.

I'll get you some.

And the price?

Never mind. It's an act of our goodwill.

An act of your goodwill.

When can I get it?

-We'll have it to you tomorrow.
-Great.

Shall I send two?

No. One.

What about complaints?

No. I don't need the trouble
at the station.

Makes sense.

Two is better.

How's that?

You love my gift, don't you?

-A log.
-Yes!

I love all your gifts, my Adem.

If only I had been as wise back then...

Anyway, once you start something,
you have to go all the way.

-I don't understand.
-You will.

Look, this is...

this is a bridge
from the past to the future.

Think of it as a metaphor
instead of a present.

-Metaphor?
-Metaphor, yes.

It means, "The to--
The tasteful journey of love."

"The delight of union runs through love."

It means just the opposite.

"Love is the union of delight."

"The delight of love is..."
Let me put it this way.

"Being united comes from
the delightful journey of love."

-That says all that?
-Yes.

It's that kind of a metaphor.

-I see.
-Now...

-Yes.
-A nice accessory for yoga, right?

You could do yoga right under it. Om.

No, it's not "om." Let's do yoga together.

No, thanks. I...

I've opened my chakras.

-Om.
-There is no "om." OK.

-So, thanks again.
-You are most welcome. Come on.

Have some nice chakras.

Hello, 112 emergency?
My wife won't wake up!

Please, hurry!

Where were you
at the time of the incident?

Incident? What incident?

The unfortunate passing of your wife.

And your great passing to bachelor life.

I... I was in my office...

Why would they ask that?

Did your wife have any enemies?

She sometimes argued
with salespeople while shopping.

Why would they ask that?
It's an accident, not a murder.

Accident.

What's up, dude? When is the wedding?
You've buried your wife.

Some strange cop.

Look, Mr. Adem is performing.
He's playing a king, I think.

A kingly guy.

You again?

-Are you the only paramedics in Turkey?
-Think of us as the family doctor.

The family ambulance.

So, are you going to faint
or is there something else?

Oh, no! It's my wife! She won't wake up!

My sweet wife.

Leyla!

Mr. Adem, I have good news.
Mrs. Leyla is in good health.

-Good how? What do you mean?
-She's awesome.

Super hot.

-Leyla?
-Adem?

Mr. Adem said something happened to you
and called us.

-What happened to me?
-My bad.

I knocked on the door...

and you didn't...

It's...

Why did you break the door?
Why didn't you open it normally?

-I got carried away.
-Look at that mess!

Gross.

Creoso...

I'll ask a question,
but don't get offended.

Are you some kind of a moron?

Why did you smell that log?

That's not a log. It's a crosstie.

Don't get distracted now.
I'm trying to tell you something.

Om.

You are so ignorant. You don't say "om."

It's a special breathing technique.

Don't get me started with your "om."
This is an emergency.

I'm doing that to annoy Leyla.

If the world burnt down
Right in front of you

You wouldn't keep your word

You are a moron at heart

Adem, move on
Om, om, om

All you care about is being alive

What did you give back to life?

You were poison
And you got poisoned

You're doomed, Adem
Om, om

When you find a new love

Just call the love fairy

You are that lousy

Yoghurt Adem
Om, om, om

Yoghurt Adem
Om, om, om

Yoghurt Adem

Om

Leyla?

Did both of us die?

Why did these idiots die?

Ilyas...

how many grams of yoghurt
did you give him per kilo?

Yoghurt is important. It's medicinal.

I suppose they died of stupidity.

He's in shock again.

-You're OK, right?
-My dear Adem.

Honey, that log was toxic. Did you know?

-Oh?
-Yes.

Why are you OK?

I was just doing yoga.

It was nice outside.

So I went out.
It's better to meditate in fresh air.

You are quite alright.

I fell asleep on the couch.

Thank God.

Thank God is right.

You should sue that place
that you got the log from.

The log was toxic.

They ripped off my husband!
They sold him a toxic log.

Ilyas, grab him by the other end.

Why doesn't he talk?

Ilyas? He was some kind of a screenwriter.

The director told him
that his dialogues were too long.

He hasn't spoken since.

Great.

Just grab the stretcher, Ilyas. Let's go.

Leyla is fine as well.

She's fit as a fiddle.

If I can't have you... no one can!

I don't have the time
to explain it all... Mr. Haris.

Give Mr. Haris two volumes of my book
An Invitation to a Meeting and Zen.

Yes, sir. Harun! Get the books ready.

Mr. Mahdum, shall I give him
volume one or volume two?

Just give him both volumes!

Anyway... Now...

You may be asking yourself

why your head hurts and why you are here.

Read that book
and you'll understand what I mean.

I...

I'm going to ask you two questions...

before I get even more pissed off.
That's why your mouth is shut.

-Should we uncover his mouth?
-No!

Black mambo.

I want the Lilith Manuscript
that Mr. Adem bought.

Money is no issue here.
These are important artifacts for me.

You look like a lowlife as well.
I thought you would help me.

They are family heirlooms. Is that enough?

Thank you.

Thank you.

Mr. Mahdum,
I think you could communicate better

if we uncovered his mouth.

It's up to you.

What's that? I said rook.

-Rook, sure. If you say rook, rook it is.
-I don't like rooks at all.

They can't move like the queen, Haris.

Why are you with Adem all the time?

Just another bad move.
It's because I'm saving Adem's marriage.

What if you don't save Adem's marriage

and live in your own mansion
instead of Leyla's?

Oh, you mean I should save you.

Such things don't happen over one session.

Besides, can you afford that?

-That knight will take your queen.
-Right away.

You know that manuscript
that Adem bought for you...

Adem is a true gentleman.

Right...

I mean,
that manuscript could change our lives.

-"Our"?
-Yes.

My life.

Change my... I should think it through.

Of course, think about it,
but Adem is not getting younger.

Checkmate again.

-Adem plays very well, you know.
-I wasn't focused. Once more?

DARLING

Adem is calling.

I don't take calls during sessions
on principle. Please, pick it up.

-Yes?
-Why did you pick up Nergis' phone?

-She's in a session now.
-You're in a session?

I pay you peanuts
and you waste it on sessions?

Cut the chitchat. Put Nergis on.

I'm in a session, dear. I can't talk.

She's in a session.
She can't talk during a session. Sorry.

-I'll fire you, Harris.
-She says, "May Haris fall on your head."

She says, "You're not the only one
who's afraid of death."

"I'm going to save Haris."
That's what she said.

Tell Nergis I've figured out a way.

None of your business.
Just tell her. She will understand.

Moron.

He said, "I've figured out a way.
Nergis will get it."

Haris, our session is over.

You overcame your existential crisis?
Feel better now?

Yes, I feel much better.
I now know all about why I exist.

Adem, don't go out.
I'm cooking something delicious.

-It will be ready in half an hour.
-Half an hour?

Fine.

I'll stay at home.

What an ugly crash that was.

I feel bad.

She must be dead, right?

Maybe today is no more

Many wait for tomorrow

Come on, reach out and take it

Come on, just grab it

Come on, take it

Don't look so stupid

Stupid

Time will take away your love

You ladies' fool

Don't stop
It's the right time

Don't look so stupid

Don't stop
Just take it

Don't look so stupid

Stupid

Come on, do it

Don't stop
Take it

You have an iron will
And strong you are

Your voice is deep
Don't stop

Come on, take it

Don't stop
Do it

Come on, grab it

Don't stop
Do it

Come on, do it

Don't stop
Grab it

Come on, do it

Don't stop
Grab it

Get up now.
I hope that poor woman is fine.

Leyla, you're alright?

A clock fell on your head.

-Something must have happened to you.
-Oh, my head!

Stop staring and take this off.

Oh, Leyla... Mrs. Leyla...

We came and checked.
You were certainly dead.

And so innocent.

-Medical science does not lie.
-I've talked with the Adems.

Talked with who?

He's in shock again.

Why don't you knock me out?
I have to talk with the Adems.

Ilyas, no. We can't do it just like that.

-That's too much.
-Back off.

-Enough!
-Leyla.

Why are you not dead?

Come on, not everyone
who gets smashed by clocks ends up dead.

-Clearly.
-I got hit by the empty part.

I don't know.

I'm having a streak of bad luck.

Adem passes out when he sees a corpse,
so he wouldn't understand.

But how come I didn't get it?

Why are you not dead?

Pure luck.

Oh, Mahdum.

Oh, yes, your techniques
are well-established.

Yes.

Is this for the Lilith Manuscript?

We're going to take care of that
the way we are used to.

Don't you worry.

Forgive me for asking,
but why did you abduct me?

I abduct people on a regular basis

so they won't feel that I kidnap them
only when I need them.

That's it. For small talk.

-Makes sense.
-It does, right?

Yes.

I've never seen
such a big collection on Lilith.

I said they were family heirlooms.

Are you not listening to me, Mr. Adem?

Nice.

Give Mr. Adem two volumes
of The Inexplicable Genius and Zen.

-Yes.
-I don't like to write about myself.

I had this written.

Weapons...

animals...

poisons...

-Oh dear.
-It's the history of our race.

Cutting and stabbing tools.
Blood and poison.

Is the sale of those not prohibited?

Nothing is prohibited
if you know the right people.

Especially if you abduct the right people.

Where can we get such items?

Two volumes of The Human Landscape
of My Country and Zen for Mr. Adem.

Thank you very much.

We've abducted three more guys.

-We have a busy schedule.
-I guess so.

The guys should drop me off then.

-Sure. Guys, knock him out.
-Here, please.

I sold one of those to Prince Charles
back in the day.

Diana was still alive.

The accident happened later.

You know what I mean.

-This?
-That?

Yes.

I wouldn't recommend it.

Is it a quick animal? It is.

But is it effective?
You should think about that.

I don't get the bitten apple.

This apple?

It's from my late wife.

Oh, my late wife! Some wife she was.

Apple. Late...

You get it.

-Let's keep the apple out of this.
-Always go with the classics.

Classic how?

Even Usain Bolt couldn't catch this.

It's sly.

Very sly when attacking its adversary.

Well...

Adem, honey... let's buy them all.

We'll release the rest into the woods.
I'm against keeping animals in cages.

That's right. We'll take the classic.

And release the rest.

Let's do that.

-What's up, dude?
-What?

-Is there some--
-My lips?

I just had botox from the snake.
It will pass soon.

-Get well soon.
-Thanks.

I can't forget that year.

I had a very high score
in the university entry exams.

I was in the top thousand in Turkey.

That high.

My father was sitting over there,
smoking a pipe.

He said to me,

"You can't even get into my ass
with those scores."

He was such a refined man.

I studied archaeology just out of spite.

I'd become Indiana Jones,
and he'd fall flat on his face.

It didn't work out, of course.

I ended up at the company.

Anyway, fuck it.

Well...

listen...

I have to kill Leyla.

She won't divorce me. What can I do?

I'm going to lose Nergis.

I feel like I am 20
when I'm around Nergis, I swear.

No problems with a divorce.

I would not need you
if I could get a divorce, right?

Did you ever get married?

Oh, wait.

You can't get married.

Your wife would eat you
on the wedding night.

You should be careful.

Leyla is quite unpredictable.

She could sit on you.

Alright?

No shit. He bit her.

Leyla?

Leyla? Are you dead?

No.

She's not dead.

Just in case...

Hello?

Hello? Ambulance?

Oh, my...

A spider bit my wife.

What's worse...

I think it's about to bite me.

It bit me.

Feed the spider,
and it will bite your butt.

What the hell?

She didn't die, but I did.

-What on earth?
-You deserve much worse.

Oh, you're gross.

You couldn't take care of a spider.

You brute!

This is no good at all.

-What if I die?
-Just cut the crap.

Say something.
Nothing's going to happen, right?

-Die!
-Well, shit happens. We're all human.

It just happens.

What could happen, man?

I'm a son of Adam

Born in Istanbul

I have weaknesses, of course

I'm fit to be a man

Due to natural process

And natural operation

I'm going to die in the end

I'm a son of Adam as well

Adem, Adem, Adem
I'm a son of Adam

I believe true I am

You are the truest of them all
And you're wrathful

Adem, Adem, Adem
You are a son of Adam

God has created you

Nature has raised you

Inside your veins

You carry the poison of women

I'm Adem

Adem, Adem, Adem
I'm a son of Adam

I'm a son of Adam

I'm a son of Adam

I'm the man

I'm a son of Adam

Hello.

Hizir?

-Are you a woman now?
-Anaphylactic shock.

Let's treat that first,

then we'll take you two to cast lead
to repel evil eyes.

It's a pity.

Why are you a woman now?

If they paid a bonus for each patient,
Mr. Adem would make me rich.

Is there a woman inside you too?

No, it's not like that.

That's my big sister. Hatice.

She's principal at the nursing school.
This is a family business.

Great.

By the way, my dad is a circumciser.

Leyla!

-Adem? Honey?
-Leyla.

Did the spider not bite you?
Did that prick only bite me?

Of course it bit me, honey.

I'm not reckless like you.

We have a garden.
There could be scorpions, bugs...

I regularly take pills.
Who knows what could happen?

You're right. You never know.

That's right.

My ginger pudding.

What's that? Use that in a sentence.

Your skin...

I mean as an emotion.

Don't think of it as food.
That's how it feels.

You know what I saw in my dream?

We were making love just like this.
Then your head falls on my lap.

And then I take a hammer and a nail...

And?

Then I affectionately bang the nail
through your temple.

-I just bang it.
-Oh, no.

You could have said it
without acting it out.

You know... my granduncle.

Forget it!

Let death come from your hands,
my pineapple-flavored lemur.

-Let death come from you.
-I feel down. I won't tell you the rest.

-There was also sex but never mind.
-Tell me.

-Come to the ginger part.
-Oh, no.

-The ginger part, please.
-No.

I feel down. I won't tell the ginger part.

-Fine. What happened next?
-What do you think, Adem?

Your head explodes, and I marry Haris.

Harris? What's he doing in your dream?

I think you're taking advantage of me
by telling me you'll divorce your wife.

Starting from here, down to my shoulders,

and down to my waist...

I believe you're using my body.

She just won't die. What can I do?

I'm really against
people killing each other.

Everybody should kill themselves.

Murder is easy.

Making it look like an accident is hard.

Then find a stake,
encourage Leyla to jump on it.

Get her to jump on it.

That's possible.

And since you gave me that idea,
you'd be the one who committed the murder.

I would burst out laughing.
I can't commit murder.

I'm going to meet Haris.

I'm not going to ask you if you're nuts,
but what's with the gestures?

Adem came to mind for a second.
That's why.

-So, did you bring the manuscript?
-I have it with me.

Welcome.

You are so light-handed.
He didn't feel being knocked out.

I'm experienced now.

I work on paintings, books and art
and do research on Lilith.

A Lilith mirror to frame beautiful faces.

Thank you so much. You are so kind.

Enjoy looking.
I'll put you on ice, my dear.

Yes, what was I saying?

Reproduction.

So, I didn't have a chance
to get married, and...

it's hard to find twins.

I'm not against polygamy. Look at me.

Oh, Mr. Mahdum!
Is that why you never married?

I suppose so.

If you had married,
I would have saved your marriage.

Mr. Mahdum, I think he wants us
to uncover his mouth.

Sure, take it off.

That's rude. You can't do that to a guest.

Thanks.

Are you alright?

I was... until you interrupted our chat.

-Fine.
-I mean...

He gets his guys to knock you out.
We could sue him right now.

Get a load of that guy.
What's he talking about?

Sue me?

Hilarious.

Listen to me.

If I wasn't in a good mood,
I would do bad things to you. Got it?

You wouldn't dare to sue me then.
But why? Forget about that.

Mr. Mahdum, let me give you this.

Yes.

The Lilith Manuscript.

Guys, get the keys to the mansion.

Give Miss Nergis a car or something.
Just do something.

It's fake.

Haris?

Adem? Adem!

Adem…

-This is just a photocopy, you ass.
-No need to call me an ass.

That's too bad.

Guys...

-Yes, sir?
-Take Miss Nergis out.

Haris stays here.

Let her stay. Just let her sit.

-Alright. Have a nice day.
-No. We were comfy like this.

Oh dear...

You're done for.

We could come to an arrangement.

Listen, I'd be of good use to you. I'm...

You are going to climb over that wall.

What do you mean, "The door is open.
Why should I go over the wall?"

Burglary in broad daylight?

-I could go right through the door.
-Don't you have any sense of aesthetics?

I've spent $20,000 just to dress you
like a decent burglar.

Get a gun, threaten them,
and get the manuscript while you're at it.

Gosh. He wants to go through the door.

-Do something right for a change.
-As you wish, Mr. Mahdum.

-Is that a leg? What's that? 
-Leyla.

Wait. Don't go in.

That's Leyla. She's a cuckoo.
She can pop up anywhere.

-But...
-Why don't you shut up?

This is all because of you,
or Faruk, or Harun.

I don't know.

You called me a legal genius
when you wanted to get the manuscript.

You were nice,
asked for my opinion. Now this?

Listen to me.

I'll cut off your face. Sleazebag!

How could I have known
that Adem sold me a fake manuscript?

But it's good that I found out.
I'm going to turn him in.

I'll just go and turn him in.

There's no video.

Oh, it's back.

Oh, Faruk. He's dead. Faruk, are you dead?

Harun. Brother?

Which one of you is dead?
I'm confused. Faruk?

-He can't be dead.
-I told Faruk to go. I'm lost now.

You looked at Harun and said,
"Faruk should go." So, Harun went in.

Adem.

Oh, she fell down. That's gravity for you.

Who's that guy?

A corpse!

Dude, what's up? You're lost in thought.

Man is a thinking animal.

You really are animals.

I wonder if she's dead.

-Oh, you're thinking about that?
-What else should I think?

I said persuasion
And persuasion it is

You should only kill...

Yourself

That's much more humane

-Did you get scared Adem?
-Did you?

What's done is done
Did you freak out?

What's haunting you in your dreams?

What's disturbing you?

What's done is done

You're not afraid of anything

You are rich

You have a silver spoon in your mouth

Nothing could happen to you

Don't be afraid

Mr. Adem, your addiction to fainting
will get you into trouble someday.

I want to see my wife's body.

-What do you mean by "body"?
-Show me Leyla's corpse.

No, let me explain.

You know the verse,

"Mr. Adem tops the list
when it comes to crazy."

"Yet Mrs. Leyla is as fresh as a daisy."

-Very healthy.
-What are you talking about?

That line doesn't go like that, Hizir.

Leyla.

"Stop with the wining. It will end badly."

"If you want eternal love,
obedience is the only remedy."

"Remedy?"

No, Mrs. Leyla means you should stop
drinking and partying,

or it will end badly.

If you're looking for an eternal friend,
you have to be loyal.

Why do you talk now?

-Why is he talking?
-This is an interesting occasion.

I mean it.

When we look
at the change process of language,

we see that meaning is independent
from the object and occasion.

-He's better off not talking, right?
-Why?

What are you babbling about?

The guy is dead outside. We forgot him.
We should call the police.

-That's right. I'll call the police.
-Do it.

He died, but how come you are alright?

I fell on top of the guy.

-What?
-Thank God.

I should go and change.

-Mrs. Leyla--
-He won't shut up.

The stakes?

Chief, we are in a mountainous spot.

The bears have started coming into town
because of the plastic waste.

-How come?
-Nobody gives those poor animals water.

I did prune the trees a bit...

as a service to the motherland--

We should talk to your wife
for a rational explanation.

What a mess! Shame!

It's one thing after another.

-You're going to make me blow.
-You axis of evil. How dare you?

How dare you come here?

-Police!
-What police? What are they going to do?

-Poor Faruk died because of you.
-Harun.

-Who?
-It was Harun.

Harun? Faruk... Ha...

"Farun" then.

He doesn't know the dead man's name.

Moron.

Don't make it necessary for us
to do a burglary in broad daylight.

-Sell it.
-I'm not selling. I won't!

-I don't hand out favors today.
-Never mind.

The manuscript you bought for Nergis
is fake, antiquity scammer Adem.

Are you not ashamed of selling us
counterfeit artifacts at auctions?

Just a second. They were fake?

Oh dear.

Leyla would take their photocopies
occasionally.

Did I sell myself a fake manuscript?

Cut it out! You sham!

It's none of your business! You're fired!

Oh, no. He didn't mean that.

That's not possible
because you and I are like...

fish bait... and...

Come on, try harder.

Fish bait and overfed fish.

-Not a hook?
-No, fish eat too much and get sick.

-Stop trying.
-Fine.

I'll tell the police about your burglary.

I would be sad if you don't tell them.
You know?

Mrs. Leyla was kind enough
to explain it all.

We'll call you in if we need
more information. Don't leave town.

Funny cops. I'm always home.

I'm sorry about what happened.

Why this sudden interest in painting,
my raspberry Frida?

I don't believe in photos, Adem.

Photos just break off the entire universe
from its momentary existence.

-Photos and paintings are both duplicates.
-Paintings are nothing like that.

Paintings create a new existence
throughout the universe.

For example, photos...

are like Leyla and you.

But a painting is like me and my future.

Like you and me?

Not exactly.

It's just the way I want to paint it.
How should I put it?

When I paint,
you may be a part of my future...

or you may not.

Don't move your mouth. Keep the posture.

By the way,
you bought me a fake manuscript.

I'll get the original.

I'll handle that.

I would have had a nice mansion now.

No fathers, husbands, state, sticks!

We rebel!

Freedom!

I don't like yearning at all,

but I'm going to miss
this nice mansion, this home.

Why, Nergis? Miss Nergis?

We are at the end
of your marital therapy, Mr. Adem.

I checked your homework.

Mrs. Leyla did a perfect job,
as she always does.

Thank you so much.
It's you who is perfect.

Yes, I'm perfect… Anyway--

What? Is the therapy ending?

So, you mean,
it's best for us to get divorced.

We should divide the property
and get divorced.

-Now, now--
-An expert's opinion.

My health is important.

As far as my health goes,
if I don't divorce Leyla, I'll die--

-Mr. Adem, could I finish my sentence?
-Please, go ahead.

We are at the end of the marital therapy
because you don't need it anymore.

You are the perfect couple to me.

-You are so perfect--
-What "perfect"?

What?

Such nice words, like a poem.

Let me put it like this.

Your marriage has been an example to me.

So, I decided to get married.

-To Haris.
-That's impossible.

What is, Adem?

It can't be over. It should not be.

The therapy.

We haven't fixed my fear of death yet.

Did we overcome my fear of death?
We did not.

-We have to overcome it.
-Let's do it like this.

Get an appointment from my secretary.

You'll come over and we'll fix that
with hypnosis. It's easy.

Miss Nergis, I'm so happy
to hear about your engagement.

Let's have the ceremony at the mansion.
"No" is not an option.

Great!

What can I say? Perfect!

Burn with your looks

Stab your dagger

Spread the power of men

All over the world

Shoot around with your honey gun

Adem, you're so special

You're special
Even when you go in for the kill

You'll find your partner

You'll start a family

You should never stop

You'll continue your lineage

-Shoot around with your honey gun
-You're good for nothing.

Adem, you are special

You are special when you shoot
And when you go in for the kill

You'll have a son

And release him into the world

And if someone objects

You'll smash their face in

-Shoot around with your honey gun
-Shoot!

-Adem, you are special
-Shame on you!

You are special when you shoot
And when you go in for the kill

You thought you would succeed

You built castles in the air

You thought you would celebrate

And bought champagne

Just recently

You made vacation plans...

-You scum!
-Ill-bred!

Evil-minded guy! Shame on you!

Shoot around with your honey gun

Adem, you are special

You are special when you shoot
And when you go in for the kill

Shoot around with your honey gun

Adem, you are special

You are special when you shoot
And when you go in for the kill

-We're just useless.
-That's perfect.

Do it!

-Do it!
-Calm down!

I'll handle it.

I have a big family.

Children of Lilith.

My condolences, mate.
We couldn't talk that night.

I blacked out.
It was Faruk who died, right?

No, sir. I'm Faruk. Harun passed away.

Was it Harun?

Fuck it. It's no big deal.

I mix them up all the time. No worries.
Will you sell the manuscript?

You said you would kill
for this manuscript, right?

Of course I would. It's a piece of cake.

Should I kill this fool?

Would you, in return for the manuscript...

Excuse me?

Would you also kill a woman?

Of course. That's nothing.

Technically speaking, they are the same.

No to sex discrimination,
yes to equal opportunities.

Makes sense.

So...

kill my wife
and you'll have the manuscript.

Sure, can do. Of course.

Everybody will die one day.

We're just bringing the date
forward a bit, that's all.

But there is a problem.

My wife won't die.

Mr. Adem, I've been doing this for years.
I've never seen anyone who wouldn't die.

Oh.

OK...

Then you should excuse me.
Get the guys to knock me out.

So...

kill my wife
and you'll have the manuscript.

We're accomplices now.

You are free to go.

Great.

And one, and two.

Ilyas, don't forget.

You'll be among rich people
at the engagement.

Your moves should be smooth.

You have to float as you dance.

You can't fight death,
unless you understand and love it.

And one, and two.

Right now, somewhere in the world,

there is a little worm
who has a shared life with an algae, Adem.

Think of that worm.

Sleep.

Sleep.

Great!

It's not.

This goes on till the digestion ends.

Why should we care, Nergis?

Come on, why should we care?

Listen.

You're not going to get engaged
to that parasite.

Since the worm needs the algae
for digestion,

the worm dies when its need is met.

I'll hire a hitman, he'll come,
shoot her and leave. That's it.

No need to mess with spiders.
I'll black out and wake up.

It's not that easy.

Why?

Because you are under hypnosis, Adem.

You will never black out again.

That is an order.

Nice.

I'll get rid of those Adems.

Everything will be just mine.

Mine, you mean.

So, you say it should be over
after the engagement.

Of course. For sure.

A young girl should pick
the right guy to marry.

I think I don't get along very well
with Haris.

Maybe you should count to three
and wake me up.

I am sitting here like a jerk.

How about it, my coconut pie? My flower.

Well, we've been through bad days,
but it's over now.

It should be over.

It should be over.

Do you still want a divorce?

No. It was probably due to andropause.

What andropause? Nonsense.

You're still better than young lads.

Yes.

We are so happy in our cozy home.

Isn't this why we settled down?

So that we would have a cozy,
peaceful, happy home.

We can open our door
and go out whenever we feel like it.

And close your door to be alone,
whenever you feel like it.

I explained that to Adem today.

You said it so well, my nutty pastry.

They should be on their own.

Tomorrow, I'll have lead cast
against evil eyes.

There have been so many accidents
and calamities.

I don't like to postpone things.
Let's have that lead cast tonight.

-Don't you agree?
-But we are celebrating.

Let's not talk about such things now.

The cake is here. Let's just stop it.

Hizir, Ilyas, Harris.

-Ilyas, Harris.
-Hello. Congratulations.

Do you know what I found out
after all the bad days we've had?

Even death can't break up a happy family.

I want dear Haris and Nergis
to be as happy as we are.

I met Nergis
thanks to my dear friend Adem.

Victory is mine.

I would like to make a toast to Adem.

The Lilith Manuscript.

Adem?

You sold the photocopies I made
at the auction.

I would like to give you
the original manuscript

as a wedding present
to my dear Haris and Nergis.

Let me get it now,
then we'll get the party started.

Save her the trouble, Adem.
Go get the manuscript.

My honey pie is the key to the safe.
I couldn't open it even if I wanted to.

This is as fun as Doctor's Day--

What's going on?

That's how you make an entrance.
I don't care if the door is open.

I'll blast it open.
A little aesthetics, a little spirit.

Did Mrs. Leyla invite you, Mr. Mahdum?

What Mahdum?

I'm not Mahdum! I'm a thief!

We are two thieves. He's the other one.

-I can't see with this on.
-Where's the safe?

There's no safe. I think you should go.

Great. Well played.

Where is the safe?

Here's the deal.

Give me a list
of the items you want to steal,

I'll have them sent over tomorrow.

How about it?

The safe is downstairs,
and Mrs. Leyla went to open it!

Lead the way!

Go on.

Don't be stupid.
She'll die, and I'll have the manuscript.

I've changed my mind. Don't you get it?

You can't change your mind just like that!

Where is this woman?
Where is the manuscript?

Leyla?

Mom?

Mahdum?

Mom!

Leyla!

There goes my cherry muffin.

Damn! You killed the fair lady!

You scum!

-We shouldn't... Let's call the police.
-How is Leyla your mother?

I'm going to kill you!

She is my mother!

Watch it! Drop it!

That's very dangerous.
You could hurt someone.

My... brother.

Hizir, it was an accident!
I was aiming at Mahdum but shot you.

Murder. I'm screwed!

First my brother died,
and now I'm a killer!

I quit!

I quit. You are a maniac! Psycho!

I've had all sorts of traumas
because of him.

You maniac! What are you doing?

Take your manuscript and fuck off!

He's annoyed me
ever since there was only one of him.

-Which one was he?
-I think Faruk.

Why did you kill Faruk?

He would have served
only a couple of months.

Wait. Don't shoot me.
You may need a lawyer.

The law is under attack...

Mr. Adem, we must write the book,

Mahdum's Love for His Mother
and How He Killed Everyone.

We'll do that later. We're in no rush.

We're still here. Hang around with Ilyas.

I was going to kill you last,
but things are in a mess.

I'll just shoot you once, then again.

So, I'll shoot you two times in all.

-Mahdum!
-Yes?

Twice... is good.

Leyla is dead.

I got rid of that dumb Harris too.

Nergis?

Yes.

What are you doing? It could be loaded.

You and I are like...

You and I...

are like...

the bullet...

Yes, try harder. You'll find something.

I can't find anything for you.

What happened?

Why is Mahdum here?

What's all this mess?

Leyla?

How do they manage to kill each other
every single time?

Mrs. Leyla, you're not dead?

I saw you get shot.

That's what sucks most
about being immortal.

You can't die.

The rest is the same.

Oh, poor Adem.

Oh, honey. Why?

Isn't that Hizir?

How did he die?

Haris?

-Did Adem kill him?
-No.

Did he kill Adem?

Everything happened suddenly.

He got mad at him and shot him.

Then he shot the other one and...

I killed Mahdum.

I killed Mahdum. I'm a killer now.

So, this is what it feels like.

Your wounds are healing.

These kinds of wounds heal quickly.

But the wounds
of having to abandon my children...

Mahdum...

my sweet son.

I've killed your son.

He died of manhood disorder.

Let me explain.

I abandon my children when they turn 18,

so that they don't find out
who I really am.

Mahdum,

he was always obsessive.

He got suspicious of me
when he was a child.

He was after the manuscript.
The Lilith Manuscript.

There's nothing in it.

Just some notes I didn't want to forget.

Like some advice for women on child labor,

a few recipes...

But that's nothing.

They have burnt down cities for less.

Come, Nergis. Come sit across from me.

Don't be afraid of me.

Oh...

death is tiring me out.

I got so used to death
that I don't feel sad anymore.

Who are you?

Immortality and this...

-How's this possible?
-I'm Leyla.

Lilith.

Only a few know my name.

The first woman.

The one before Eve.

The serpent's servant.

The hideous, home-wrecker,
jealous, woman-hater...

man-eater, female spider.

-Do I look like that?
-No.

No.

If you don't mind me asking,

how old are you?

As old as the soil. Do the math.

Paradise?

We used to call the place
you were born in, the Earth, Paradise.

And who do you mean by "we"?

Everything was so beautiful
in the beginning.

Adam and I are from the same mud.

So, I said,

"We're spouses. We are equal. How nice."

I don't know what got into Adam,

but he started to claim,
"I'm a man, I am this, I am that."

Gosh, you should have seen him.

And then everything got out of hand.

What's going on?

What are they doing here?

Where are the Adems?

Dumb Ilyas put an arrow through my neck.

Why did you kill me?

Stop it, Adem. We're dead already.

Don't depress us any further.

Nergis killed him.
She speared him through the chest.

I shot my own mother.

Don't have pity on me in here.

-Where's Mom?
-Hold on. Where's Leyla?

Leyla is missing.

I've tried nine times, but she didn't die.

What are you doing here?

I've had too much snake.

Oh, Ilyas.

Ilyas is not dead.

Oh, Ilyas.

Ilyas, what are you doing?

-Ilyas, Hizir is dead.
-No.

Come on!

Life is just a smile between two breaths.

I'm Ilyas.

From life.

I'm dragging it out.

Game over.

Ilyas, wait.

He killed himself.

All men know is how to kill.

If there is nobody to kill,
they kill themselves.

There! Ilyas has arrived.

-Hizir.
-Ilyas, who killed you, brother?

I killed you, so how could I stay behind?

We tried to kill the broad
but ended up dead. Some fate!

Could Hell be a place where
you imprison yourself in your own mind?

It's getting warmer.

Yes, guys, yes.

We can't wait forever. Please enter.

Let's take you in.

Yes.

What's in there?

Shit.

Hold on.

Have a nice day.
We've come to the wrong place.

Which way is Paradise?

Just go over there.

-My condolences.
-Move.

It really stinks inside. May God save you.

Yes, there's eau de cologne, tissues.

Wash your hands first.
Cleanliness is next to godliness.

-There.
-Thank you.

I'd like to exercise my right
to a defense if I have one.

-Clean your hands.
-So justice is the same here.

-Clean your hands well.
-How much?

This is on the house.

Wipe your face too. Do it. Yes, move.

Well, I never did it.
I mean, I died a virgin.

So, I wonder, are there any houri?

Dude, this is Hell.

Why am I going to Hell?

Hold on, let me check
if there's a mistake.

Yes.

So, you are a screenwriter.
Get in there, screenwriter.

-Did you escape again?
-Yeah.

The killer and victim
of this murder is obvious.

And there is me, "victimess,"
the murdered woman.

We are in different categories
even in death. Yes.

Did you ever hear things like
a male pilot, male author, male doctor?

They almost had the audacity
to say "female human."

I'm repulsed by that.

I could die of this repulsion…
that is, if I could die.

Mrs. Leyla, I...

What are we doing? I don't get it.
And I think I'm going slightly mad.

Calm down. You don't have to be afraid.

First, get rid of that stupid face
that says,

"I've seen an immortal witch,
and I'm freaking out."

I'll do it.

Your hair is beautiful.

Is the color natural?

No, hair dye.

Right. I thought so.

I badly need to dye my roots.

I've neglected myself lately.

Something's happening.

Your skin, your hair.

When the men I'm having a relationship
with die, be it my husbands or lovers,

I return to my twenties.

That's my curse.

There's something that bugs me.

Did you know
that Adem was trying to kill me?

Yes.

I'm deeply sorry. I really am.

I didn't know what death was.

It is really bad.

Being ugly and ceasing to exist is so bad.

I'm surprised. Usually they attempt it
a couple of times and give up.

But Adem tried nine times.

What did you expect from Adem?

That is, if I could die.

I would have had a man
who would love me forever.

And then?

For Adem,

or Adems,

love is not enough.

They need a woman to prove themselves.

They must trick a woman into believing
they would die for her.

Then it's,
"I loved her a lot, so I killed her."

"She didn't love me, so I killed her."

"She loved someone else, so I killed her."

Why didn't you divorce Adem?

This time...

I followed expectations of me.

The lady of the house.

Like...

a woman who satisfies her husband's needs,

who obeys him,

to see if he would settle down.

I thought this could be a new way of life

and that we'd walk hand in hand, but...

it didn't turn out well.

In the end, we locked horns.

What now?

Obstinacy and hope.
They are the same. We'll start again.

Yes. You and I.

You and I?

I've started over a hundred times.

Fine. Being a man is an innate defect.

Such a shame.

They get it all wrong.

But we can't do without them.

Don't you hate them
after all these things?

No way.

This is not about sexuality.
It's about mentality.

I still watch in amazement
what's happening around me.

Men have glaring hopes when they say,

"You're not alone.
We'll do everything together."

But when they take up arms,
that hope vanishes.

When you're tired,
you can rest on their shoulders.

They have a heart that grows bigger
with a little compliment.

Is it possible?

I'll teach you what I know,
and you'll teach me.

-Do you know this song?
-I love it.

You are so young today, my child

Let this be the last.

So be it. Let this be the last.

Life promises you happy days

What are you doing?
There are corpses everywhere.

In ancient times,
we used to dance for our dead

so that they might come back in envy.

Man has cried at birth

Let this be the last

Man has cried at birth

Let this be the last

No song is without you

No flowers would bloom

You are the future already

Scorch the covers of your heart

No shame, no fear
Should hold you back

Woman has cried at birth

Let this be the last

Woman has cried at birth

Let this be the last

No shame, no fear
Should hold you back

Woman has cried at birth

Let this be the last

Woman has cried at birth

Let this be the last

Woman has cried at birth

Let this be the last

Woman has cried at birth

Let this be the last

Woman has cried at birth

Let this be the last

Woman has cried at birth

Let this be the last

Any believers in love at first sight?

You get charmed, you know

That was my love for you

Trust me
There was nobody but you

Cool men don't fall in love

Men just don't look around like teens

I just want a beauty by my side

Just to show off to others

She should set a perfect table

If anything is missing
She'd go and get it

Does marriage kill love?

Does marriage make love smile?

Does marriage extinguish love?

Does marriage make love crawl?

We are the ideal in marriage

We swear that we're in love

What would I do without him?

I'll find a new one
If she is no more

Don't leave
Stand by me

I have a little crazy blood in me

Even a male fly would do for me

You should be as lucky as me

It's like I didn't have a life before you

I couldn't get over emotional stress

If I could start life over again

And have another husband again

I would want someone just like you

I would stick to you and not let go

I prefer women who are witty

When I get bored, I drink whisky

Get a chair and sit, woman

I felt a connection between us

Just clear your mind of all troubles

Yet iron my dark green suit tomorrow

Does marriage kill love?

Does marriage make love smile?

Does marriage extinguish love?

Does marriage make love crawl?

Does marriage kill love?

Does marriage make love smile?

Does marriage extinguish love?

Does marriage make love crawl?

Listen, ladies, what's with the airs?

Even if you claim him
They'll take him from you

I'm on my own against all of you

How ugly you are without makeup

When I enter, all doors just blast
I step in and take down all walls

I'll pinpoint the guy that I'm after

Don't look for me

I will find you

You and I together are not worth much

We are quite the same

Just like tires and a car

Like cocoa and sugar

If you should get in trouble

Don't be shy and call me

Mark my words

Women are the worst

Does marriage kill love?

Does marriage make love smile?

Does marriage extinguish love?

Does marriage make love crawl?

Does marriage kill love?

Does marriage make love smile?

Does marriage extinguish love?

Does marriage make love crawl?

Any believers in love at first sight?

You get charmed, you know

That was my love for you

Trust me, there was nobody but you

Cool men don't fall in love

Men just don't look around like teens

I just want a beauty by my side

Just to show off to others

She should set a perfect table

If anything is missing
She'd go and get it

Does marriage kill love?

Does marriage make love smile?

Does marriage extinguish love?

Does marriage make love crawl?

We are the ideal in marriage

We swear that we're in love

What would I do without him?

I'll find a new one if she is no more

Don't leave
Stand by me

I have a little crazy blood in me

Even a male fly would do for me

You should be as lucky as me

Does marriage kill love?

Does marriage make love smile?

Does marriage extinguish love?

Does marriage make love crawl?

Does marriage kill love?

Does marriage make love smile?

Does marriage extinguish love?

Does marriage...