60 Seconds to Live (2022) - full transcript
From the studio that brought you 60 seconds to Die, 60 seconds to Sleep, and 60 second Abs.
What is that?
Blood?
What is that box?
"Do not open"?
Holy fuck, it smells!
What?
Fuck, where are the lights?
Welcome back.
Pretty,
pretty thing.
All innocent in white.
Don't you wish to join the
creatures of the night?
They say you should be good,
and they tie you up in rules,
but your mommy didn't have
you by being a good girl.
Ignore that.
Thou shalt not.
It only leads to
torture and war.
Embrace what thou wills,
and discover yourself and more.
So, break the bones and dance.
Just follow your
heart's desires.
Let your passions
blow wild and free,
and set the world on fire!
This is my moment.
Looking good!
Fire!
What the hell are
you doing in here?
This is the coroner report
of county coroner Michael Smith.
Patient is a white male,
approximately 46 years old.
No apparent signs
of strangulation.
Toxicity report
came back negative.
Organ analysis shows no sign
of other interior disease,
and there did not appear to be
any outward sign of struggle.
According to
the police report,
the patient was found on
the living room floor,
and there were no
signs of forced entry.
In my professional opinion,
this patient died
of natural causes.
And that's all anyone's
ever gonna know.
Jenny, I need to talk to you!
Leave me the fuck alone.
- No, it's important!
- Leave me alone, weirdo.
Reports
of pets in the area
going missing in the night.
Locals authorities
suggest, if you have a pet-
Good night, dad.
Good night, pudding.
Gotcha!
Ah, perfect.
There, there, child.
Hi, we're back.
We had such a lovely
time at the park.
It's a pity you missed it.
Who's we?
Huh?
Huh?
What the?
Oh my God.
Sit down!
Sit down, sit down!
Shut up, shut
up, hand it over!
What?
What do you think?
Let go and hand it over, now!
What makes you think
I won't use this?
It's not that easy to kill
someone with that thing.
Certainly not the first one.
You can have your
finger on that trigger,
and your finger is
squeezing real hard like,
but then, your finger
and your brain,
that all-important
connection, then-
Oh my God, oh my God!
Oh my God, oh my God,
oh my God, oh no!
Do you confess to the
murder of Amber Smith?
Yes.
Did you know the
victim personally?
No.
Then why did you do it?
It's the blood.
It's all about the blood, man.
Do you want to
know if they're mine?
I'll tell you what you
really want to know.
You want to know
how long it took for me to
drain the blood from their body.
You want to know.
All the juicy, gory details,
like how I ripped
out their hearts.
Don't tell me what I did.
I'll tell you what I did.
That's how this goes.
I'm the only one that knows.
Me!
No one else!
No one else.
Do you want to know their names?
Well, then fetch me my hat.
This isn't a discussion!
Get me
my hat!
Hat.
Fucking bitch.
I hope you don't
have any kids.
My savior!
Oh, honey.
Hey.
Hey, have you
seen Dan anywhere?
No, I haven't.
Oh, he's always late.
Do you know where my purse is?
Uh, yeah, inside
the bedroom, I think.
Emily.
Open the door!
Open the door!
There's someone in here!
Open the door, please!
Open the door!
Open it, please,
there's someone in here!
Open the door!
Hey, what's going on?
I just heard screaming.
It's just a Halloween prank.
Oh.
Yeah, Dan's inside,
scaring her with some
stupid mask or something.
Oh.
What?
- Dan?
- Hey.
Sorry I'm late.
Where's Emily?
Shit.
Get off my lawn, you
man bun wearing assholes!
Man buns, be a real
man and grow a beard!
You're a fucking scumbag,
so I need the money now.
All right, I got it.
Yeah, it won't be a problem.
Oh, I'm dead.
Do you agree? He does agree.
What the fuck was that?
If you're buying street drugs,
watch out for the mushrooms
that have the little
red dots on them.
I know I'm tripping balls.
Die, die, die!
You want some more?
Die, die, die, die!
You want some more?
A truly great
thing he has done.
Hello, Karl. Remember me?
Picture the face.
Yeah, you remember.
It's not a very good thing
when you laugh in my face.
Fuck off, whatever.
It brings me to this
horrible boiling point,
and I just erupt.
It makes me very, very angry.
Really?
I know where this
fuck-up of a man
that I'm starting at,
right before me, lives,
and I will come for you, Karl.
You ain't coming here.
You will really,
really regret the day
that you ever laughed
in my fucking face.
Where the fuck are you?
This ain't real.
This ain't real.
It's happening.
No, no, no!
Come on, no, no!
No, no, leave me alone!
What do you want? No!
Oh, baby!
Hey, baby, do you
want to get kinky?
Fuck yeah!
The safe word is "muffin lived".
Muffin, oh...
Okay, strike that
from the record.
You like that?
All right, yeah.
What are you doing, honey?
Oh, shit, muffin, muffin lived,
muffin lived, muffin lived!
Okay.
I don't want to
get kinky anymore.
Don't touch the coin.
Put it back.
Stay out. Stay out.
Stay out!
Stay out!
Get out.
Get out. Stay out.
Leave the woods.
Don't touch the coin, run!
Get out!
Get out, get out!
Run, don't touch the coin!
Stay out, stay out!
Run.
Help me.
Help me.
She's beautiful,
And she was beautiful
when she died 300 years ago.
Well, hold the stake
above her heart,
and I will end her unholy-
- Whoa, whoa, when do I
get to use the mallet?
What?
Well, it's just, you know,
I'm always stuck
holding the stake,
and let's be honest, your aim
isn't as good as it used to.
One mistake, once!
How am I ever going to learn
if you won't give me a chance?
Oh, so now you're the
master vampire hunter.
Is that it?
Old Man Herdenburg can't
cut the mustard anymore.
Is that what people are saying?
Sir, I meant no disrespect.
No, it is I who
should apologize.
You serve me faithfully
and well these many years.
You've earned it.
To you goes the
honor of the kill.
Oh, where did she go?
Oh, where did she go?
Jeez.
Cut.
Ah!
Blood?
What is that box?
"Do not open"?
Holy fuck, it smells!
What?
Fuck, where are the lights?
Welcome back.
Pretty,
pretty thing.
All innocent in white.
Don't you wish to join the
creatures of the night?
They say you should be good,
and they tie you up in rules,
but your mommy didn't have
you by being a good girl.
Ignore that.
Thou shalt not.
It only leads to
torture and war.
Embrace what thou wills,
and discover yourself and more.
So, break the bones and dance.
Just follow your
heart's desires.
Let your passions
blow wild and free,
and set the world on fire!
This is my moment.
Looking good!
Fire!
What the hell are
you doing in here?
This is the coroner report
of county coroner Michael Smith.
Patient is a white male,
approximately 46 years old.
No apparent signs
of strangulation.
Toxicity report
came back negative.
Organ analysis shows no sign
of other interior disease,
and there did not appear to be
any outward sign of struggle.
According to
the police report,
the patient was found on
the living room floor,
and there were no
signs of forced entry.
In my professional opinion,
this patient died
of natural causes.
And that's all anyone's
ever gonna know.
Jenny, I need to talk to you!
Leave me the fuck alone.
- No, it's important!
- Leave me alone, weirdo.
Reports
of pets in the area
going missing in the night.
Locals authorities
suggest, if you have a pet-
Good night, dad.
Good night, pudding.
Gotcha!
Ah, perfect.
There, there, child.
Hi, we're back.
We had such a lovely
time at the park.
It's a pity you missed it.
Who's we?
Huh?
Huh?
What the?
Oh my God.
Sit down!
Sit down, sit down!
Shut up, shut
up, hand it over!
What?
What do you think?
Let go and hand it over, now!
What makes you think
I won't use this?
It's not that easy to kill
someone with that thing.
Certainly not the first one.
You can have your
finger on that trigger,
and your finger is
squeezing real hard like,
but then, your finger
and your brain,
that all-important
connection, then-
Oh my God, oh my God!
Oh my God, oh my God,
oh my God, oh no!
Do you confess to the
murder of Amber Smith?
Yes.
Did you know the
victim personally?
No.
Then why did you do it?
It's the blood.
It's all about the blood, man.
Do you want to
know if they're mine?
I'll tell you what you
really want to know.
You want to know
how long it took for me to
drain the blood from their body.
You want to know.
All the juicy, gory details,
like how I ripped
out their hearts.
Don't tell me what I did.
I'll tell you what I did.
That's how this goes.
I'm the only one that knows.
Me!
No one else!
No one else.
Do you want to know their names?
Well, then fetch me my hat.
This isn't a discussion!
Get me
my hat!
Hat.
Fucking bitch.
I hope you don't
have any kids.
My savior!
Oh, honey.
Hey.
Hey, have you
seen Dan anywhere?
No, I haven't.
Oh, he's always late.
Do you know where my purse is?
Uh, yeah, inside
the bedroom, I think.
Emily.
Open the door!
Open the door!
There's someone in here!
Open the door, please!
Open the door!
Open it, please,
there's someone in here!
Open the door!
Hey, what's going on?
I just heard screaming.
It's just a Halloween prank.
Oh.
Yeah, Dan's inside,
scaring her with some
stupid mask or something.
Oh.
What?
- Dan?
- Hey.
Sorry I'm late.
Where's Emily?
Shit.
Get off my lawn, you
man bun wearing assholes!
Man buns, be a real
man and grow a beard!
You're a fucking scumbag,
so I need the money now.
All right, I got it.
Yeah, it won't be a problem.
Oh, I'm dead.
Do you agree? He does agree.
What the fuck was that?
If you're buying street drugs,
watch out for the mushrooms
that have the little
red dots on them.
I know I'm tripping balls.
Die, die, die!
You want some more?
Die, die, die, die!
You want some more?
A truly great
thing he has done.
Hello, Karl. Remember me?
Picture the face.
Yeah, you remember.
It's not a very good thing
when you laugh in my face.
Fuck off, whatever.
It brings me to this
horrible boiling point,
and I just erupt.
It makes me very, very angry.
Really?
I know where this
fuck-up of a man
that I'm starting at,
right before me, lives,
and I will come for you, Karl.
You ain't coming here.
You will really,
really regret the day
that you ever laughed
in my fucking face.
Where the fuck are you?
This ain't real.
This ain't real.
It's happening.
No, no, no!
Come on, no, no!
No, no, leave me alone!
What do you want? No!
Oh, baby!
Hey, baby, do you
want to get kinky?
Fuck yeah!
The safe word is "muffin lived".
Muffin, oh...
Okay, strike that
from the record.
You like that?
All right, yeah.
What are you doing, honey?
Oh, shit, muffin, muffin lived,
muffin lived, muffin lived!
Okay.
I don't want to
get kinky anymore.
Don't touch the coin.
Put it back.
Stay out. Stay out.
Stay out!
Stay out!
Get out.
Get out. Stay out.
Leave the woods.
Don't touch the coin, run!
Get out!
Get out, get out!
Run, don't touch the coin!
Stay out, stay out!
Run.
Help me.
Help me.
She's beautiful,
And she was beautiful
when she died 300 years ago.
Well, hold the stake
above her heart,
and I will end her unholy-
- Whoa, whoa, when do I
get to use the mallet?
What?
Well, it's just, you know,
I'm always stuck
holding the stake,
and let's be honest, your aim
isn't as good as it used to.
One mistake, once!
How am I ever going to learn
if you won't give me a chance?
Oh, so now you're the
master vampire hunter.
Is that it?
Old Man Herdenburg can't
cut the mustard anymore.
Is that what people are saying?
Sir, I meant no disrespect.
No, it is I who
should apologize.
You serve me faithfully
and well these many years.
You've earned it.
To you goes the
honor of the kill.
Oh, where did she go?
Oh, where did she go?
Jeez.
Cut.
Ah!